This post is based on a talk by Evan Sayet some years ago called “Understanding How Modern Liberals Think.” After giving his talk, Sayet received numerous comments that he had discovered the grand unified theory of liberalism. The talk is good, although he goes off on a few too many Team Red tangents for my taste. So this is my modified version of his idea.
When hearing prog opinions, the natural reaction of everyone else is to think that progs must be evil or stupid to believe such things. True, some of them are. But there is a problem here. For example, whatever you think about Michael Moore, he is definitely not stupid. Stupid people don’t make millions of dollars with documentaries. And whatever else you think about Ben Cohen and Jerry Greenfield, they are not evil. They make ice cream with silly names.
Alright, so if they aren’t evil and they aren’t stupid, what is going on? As it turns out, the heart of it is an extremely convoluted thought process that goes like this: of all the different systems people have tried over history, none have created a society devoid of crime, poverty, war, and so on. So, the modern prog concludes from this that the desire to be right is the source of evil. For if no one thought they were right, no one would argue or fight or go to war and so on. If people gave up the search for truth and right, we could all join hands and live happily ever after in the Kindergarten of Eden.
So if no one is better than anyone else, if someone *is* better than someone else, it must be because that they cheated somehow. Therefore, the prog will always side with what is evil, failed, and wrong over what is good, right, and successful. It’s like life is a big roulette wheel, and if the same number comes up over and over, it must be that the wheel is biased.
And the more successful a person or group is, then the greater they must have cheated to get there. This is explains the great hatred most progs have for the US. Only a prog could look at the US, the most prosperous society in history, and see nothing but poverty. Only a prog could look at the US, the least racist society in history, and see nothing but bigotry. Only a prog could look at the US, the most technologically advanced society in history, and see nothing but ignorance. Only a prog could look at the US, the least sexist society in history, and see nothing but misogyny.
How did such an idiotic idea gain widespread adherence? Well, for most of history, you had to be smart and/or lucky to avoid hunger, disease, and poverty. After WW2, these things were largely banished. An entire generation in the US grew up under the illusion that the near paradise they were born into was a fallen world instead of the result of thousands of years of intense effort and numerous setbacks. And even more incredibly, they thought that this state of affairs was so bad that it had to be demolished. That generation has been in charge of the the US government, media, and academia for about 30 years now.
There is hope however. Since progs will inevitably make a mess of things wherever they have control (Sweden, California, Zimbabwe, Venezuela, Detroit, Greece…), it is only a matter of time before their rule crumbles.
So take heart, my friends. For though the progs may seem mighty now, they planted the seeds of their own destruction long ago. And those seeds are beginning to sprout.