Happy Thursday!  Well the parents made it into town safe and sound. And I’m already down $20 to my dad on the golf course.  But that’s fine.  I’ve got a chance to get it back tomorrow. But we can worry about tomorrow tomorrow. This is today.  But first let’s talk about yesterday. Then we can talk about today.  And speaking of yesterday, you baseball winners were: New York (NL), Texas, Pittsburgh, Arizona, Anaheim, Atlanta, BALTIMORE!!!!!!!!!!, Boston, Cleveland, St Louis, New York (AL), Milwaukee, Kansas City, and Oakland.  The world champion Houston Astros had the day off.

The last golf major of the year starts today, as the best players in the game tee off in St Louis.  My expected contenders:  Dustin Johnson, Rory McIlroy, Rickie Fowler (until he starts to realize he has a chance and then he will fold up like a lawn chair) and Brooks Koepka.  They’re all high ball hitters, and with a soft course taking some of the roll out, they’re the guys most likely to be hitting shorter irons into the greens.

Happy Birthday, mustache man

Let’s see who was born on this date, shall we:  molecular scientist Amedo Avogadro, Russian novelist Leo Tolstoy, actor Robert Shaw who did a scene not even OMWC can deny as brilliant, basketball star Bob Cousy, tennis great Rod Laver, rocker Billy Henderson, boxer Ken Norton, another genius actor Sam Elliott, Trivial Pursuit creator Chris Haney, once-attractive Melanie Griffith, early rapper Kurtis Blow, designer Michael Kors, singer and crack aficionado Whitney Houston, expectation-missing Brett Hull, bassist Kyle Kyle, Neon Deion Sanders, prostitute and fan of Hugh Grant Divine Brown, asshole Chris Cuomo and NFL flop JaMarcus Russell.

Its also the date on which Caesar routed Pompey at Pharsalus, the Sistine Chapel was opened, Cromwell divided England into 11 districts, Robert Fulton tested his first steam paddle boat (it sank), Napoleon annexed Westphalia, five years later on this date he set sail for exile on St Helena, Thoreau published Walden, Rudolhp Diesel was granted a pretty important patent, “Betty Boop” made her debut, Jesse Owens (arguably the greatest athlete of all time) won his fourth gold medal of the 1936 Olympic Games, Fat Man arrived in Nagasaki, Singapore became an independent nation, Nixon resigned from office as Gerald Ford assumes the position, and in a day all Canadians will remember as their darkest, Wayne Gretzky was traded from Edmonton to Los Angeles.

Ok, that was better than yesterday.  Now on to…the links!

Get this man a Xanax!

Rudy Guiliani goes off the rails in an interview. I’m pretty sure he’s right in that he thinks the entire reason for interviewing Trump is to catch him in a perjury trap. Not so sure the rest isn’t all bluster, although its becoming pretty widely known that the FBI was using the unsubstantiated info from a foreign agent (who was paid by a political party to collect info from Russian spies) to obtain warrants to spy on a presidential campaign and that was not disclosed to the secret court they used to obtain them.

I guess Hamas forgot that when you shoot rockets indiscriminately into the country that provides all of your water and electricity, there will possibly be a reckoning.  What a bunch of dumbasses.

YouTube continues their crusade against wrongthink.  But let’s give them credit: at least they aren’t planning on unpersoning* everyone who doesn’t think as they do, which we’ve seen them do recently.  (*And yes, I do mean “unperson”. Because literally memory-holing content that they don’t like but in no way can substantiate how it violates their terms of service is a deliberate attempt to quash those views, no matter how idiotic or unhinged they are.)

Please, Trump, pardon this man!

Wikileaks is saying Julian Assange has been asked to testify for the Senate Intelligence Committee.  That would be an interesting, and relevant, development.  I wonder if Diane Feinstein’s driver has volunteered to pick him up and take him to the Chinese Embassy in London for the interview.  You know, since she was employing a spy for over 20 years as her driver.

If you’re single and suffer from a form of yellow fever, then you may want to read this. What a sad state of affairs this is.  300 million members on a singles dating site.  That’s more than there were SoCons on Ashley Madison!

Convicted rapist in California who got off a lot easier than he should have has lost his appeal.  He was sentenced to 6 months in jail for the conviction, the judge was recalled and a raft of new rape laws in California were enacted in the wake of the original case.

And you’re in a gang, and you’re in a gang, and you’re in a gang. You too. There’s another one! And he’s stealing a football!!!
-Chicago cops

I’m shocked! Shocked to find out that Chicago police pretty much named every single kid they came in contact with as a gang member from certain neighborhoods over a 10 year period. 30,000 of them, to be exact.  Including almost 400 that were 12 and under.  I’m sure it was a deliberate decision and in no way just their default position in order to fuck with people.  That’s not like them. They’re professionals, goddammit! And if you don’t believe them, they’ll crack your skull until you do…or until you’re dead. What do they care?

What kind of asshole uses a stun gun on an 11-year old girl that’s caught shoplifting? A Cincinnati cop does, apparently. The cop charged her with theft and obstruction of justice, but the mayor has intervened and the charges dropped.  “An investigation is underway”, which means a sweet vacation followed by additional training (while receiving overtime pay) for the idiot who thought this was a good exercise of judgment.

And the Army has suspended the discharge of immigrant recruits. For now, anyway. Because we should let people in our military (all the stories I read were for people being discharged before they even attended basic training) from foreign nations who can’t pass a background check in order to kowtow to political opposition.

Slim pickings today. But I dedicate this song to all the Glibs out there.

Now go out there and have a great day!