Hey guys, how’s your Wednesday? I’ve just about managed to soft-land my BAC at zero. So that’s good. For Lachowsky and other TOOL fans on this site, I meant to tell you: Suck it! I saw the new music first!

Lizzy Warren has a new plan to spend other people’s money! For $100B lets just give free pills to everyone who wants them and solve the fetanyl problem.

Wow, 17.6M government workers in the US. Imagine if they were all libertarians doing the Ron Swanson.

There was an Exorcist conference in Rome. St. John the Revelator would find that appropriate.

Hey guys, ABC has finally come around to the idea that maybe Teddy Kennedy was a manslaughtering, lying piece of shit. 50 years after Chappaquidick.


Here’s a little song for bacon-magic. Here’s the backstory.

Do you really want to pay for that Snickers with your ass?