Another week, another month, another year, another decade. What does any of this actually matter? It doesn’t. Nothing matters, all is shit. But that’s OK, the news has been vastly entertaining.

But we need to look at birthdays first, because after all, what is life without ritual and consistency? Today marks the birth anniversaries of a guy who apparently pissed off the Clintons; one of the few adults to fuck Michael Jackson; a chick who could kick your ass and not even exert herself; a chick who was inspired by Mary Jo Kopechne; a guy who… wait, didn’t he just croak?; a very, very underrated drummer; a guy with great hair and a delightfully deteriorated liver; a guy who made some really fun movies; and a guy reputed to have the smallest dick in Hollywood but didn’t give a damn.

News!

 

“Why bother? She’ll be committing suicide next week anyway.”

 

It’s fun seeing shit like this. No pretense.

 

Cool story, bro.

 

Hell freezes over. Literally.

 

This is the kind of thing that makes life worth living.

 

Another cool story, bro.

 

Piece of shit survives.

 

Old Guy Music today is just… delightful. One more example of bad vocals that somehow are perfect, along with the expected insane playing.