VE HAF VAYS OF MAKINK YOU VEAR THE MASK!

Since Some Republicans Still Refuse to Wear Masks in Congress, Now Nancy Pelosi Is Requiring It

Wearing a mask to prevent the spread of the coronavirus is an act of citizenship. It is also, of course, an act of self-preservation, but because mask-wearing appears more effective at preventing transmission of the virus than preventing your catching it yourself, wearing a face covering amounts to a small self-sacrifice in service of the greater good of communities, states, and, in aggregate, the country. Dr. Anthony Fauci articulated why he wears a mask this way: “I wear it for the reason that I believe it is effective,” he said. “It is not 100 percent effective—I mean, it’s sort of respect for the other person and have that other person respect you. You wear a mask. They wear a mask. You protect each other.” Many Americans, however, particularly those on the God-fearing, freedom-idolizing political right, refuse to wear masks, including the president of the United States. President Donald Trump’s signaling has been clear: He’s not only refused to wear a mask, he’s mocked those who do. Others in Congress have followed the president’s lead, refusing to wear a mask in the cramped corridors of the Capitol. The GOP’s “no-mask caucus” is an outlier even in its own party, but as virus rates continue to climb in portions of the country, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi made a move Tuesday to require House members to don a mask in committee hearings.

This preamble of question-begging and base-stealing is exactly why Slate is the premier infotainment site on Paywall Alley. Without viewers like [reads off card] Arnold Dipshit of Fuckwit, Maryland, they might have to work for a living.

Nancy Pelosi, seen here not wearing her stagecoach robbin’ mask on the House floor.


EXCLUSIVE: ‘He’s a real man.’ Melania bragged about the size of Donald Trump’s manhood to friends and was so distraught over cheating scandal, she fled to a hotel to ‘get away from him’, new bio reveals

Jordan writes when Melania was dating Trump in the late 1990s she would chat about him with her former roommate Matthew Atanian, a retired fashion photographer.

Atanian recalled he and Edit Molner, the girlfriend of model scout Paolo Zampolli, were once joking about Trump having a small penis.

Melania cut in and said: ‘Don’t say this – he’s a real man’.

Melania told Atanian similar things about Trump’s over-the-top, gilded apartment atop Trump Tower.

She gushed: ‘Oh it’s so beautiful. So much class. This is the way real men live’.

Still no word on which mushroom his penis resembles. I’ve got my money on a bundle of enoki.


 

What about changing to “Frog Face and The Who Gives A Shits?”

 


“Call in the airstrike
“with a poison kiss”