MERCURY RETROGRADE, I repeat, we are in a time of MERCURY RETROGRADE.  This particular periods will be characterized by abnormally high rates of spillage, breakage and other forms of alcohol abuse.

Other than that, there’s not a lot.  On Tuesday there will be change/chaos/disorder (but not necessarily malice) in domestic matters thanks to a brief hookup between the moon and MERCURY RETROGRADE.

The Moon in Virgo declares that this is the Week of the Woman(tm), so half the world (but unfortunately no libertarians) will have a good time.  While Aquarius will have a bit of a disruption thanks to MERCURY RETROGRADE, on Monday, it will add Venus to its harem of planets, so literally everything will be awesome, unless you’re a boxer.

So while the stars are saying everything is going to be great, the cards are saying “yeah right, bitch.”  Divinatory technique smackdown week is a go!  Just FYI, any time a wands card is reversed, there’s also a suggestion of erectile dysfunction.  Enjoy!

Aquarius:  Ace of Wands reversed – Fall, decadence, ruin, perdition, to perish

Pisces:  Page of Swords reversed – The evil side of authority, spying, what is unforeseen, unprepared state, sickness

Aries:  Knight of Wands reversed – Rupture, division, interruption, discord.

Taurus:  5 of Swords reversed – Degradation, destruction, revocation, infamy, dishonor, loss

Gemini:  2 of Cups – Love, passion, friendship, affinity, union, concord, sympathy

Cancer:  The Hanged Man – Wisdom, circumspection, discernment, trials, sacrifice, intuition, divination, prophecy

Leo:  King of Wands reversed – Good people being severe, the downside of honesty

Virgo:  3 of Wands – Established strength, enterprise, effort, trade, commerce, discovery, able co-operation in business

Libra:  The Chariot reversed – Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat

Scorpio:  Ace of Cups reversed -House of the false heart, mutation, instability, revolution.

Sagittarius:  Queen of Swords – Widowhood, female sadness and embarrassment, absence, sterility, mourning, privation, separation

Capricorn:  9 of Cups –  Concord, contentment, physical bien-être, victory, success, advantage, satisfaction