Good morning from the moldy, condensation dripping home of your favorite furry green muppet! I’m pinch hitting, well, because SP threatened to sharpen my trash can lid and I don’t need sharp metal objects laying around while Mrs. trshmnstr is lamenting my avoidance of the snip snip surgery. She may get…ideas. *shudder*

Just thinking about it makes my felt retract within itself. My pal Kermit used to be a baritone until Miss Piggy got ahold of the tadpoles, if you get my drift. Speaking of Miss Piggy, how ’bout the links?

I’m sure it’s somebody’s birthday today, but I don’t care about that trash.

Sports… Hockey is coming up on the Stanley Cup, right? The Stanley Cup looks like a giant trash can, so i approve. Horses race each other and some are injected with trash, so I approve. Indy 500 is coming up, and they release a bunch of balloons that turn into trash, so I approve. Pro disc golf has the week off, but the baskets look kinda like trash cans, so I approve. Pro basketball is trash, but not the good kind, so I disapprove. The trash family is going to a baseball game on Sunday, where I expect to eat trash and throw trash on the ground, so I approve. Soccer is for Eurotrash, so I approve.

Now, let me rummage through the ol’ can here and see what I can scare up…

One man’s treasure is another man’s trash.
Dr. Jekyll may be nice, but Hyde will spit on you and call you trash.
Mushrooms to help clean up this trash?
Guess who ended up in my trash.
People don’t want it, so throw the extras in the trash.

This song probably sounds like trash.