Ode to Cabbage

by | Nov 29, 2021 | Cooking, Food & Drink, Recipes | 249 comments

I love cabbage, but recently I had groceries delivered.Ā  I failed to specify the shopper should buy a small one.Ā  Instead, I got one the size of a soccer ball.

That's a lot of cabbage

Cabbage keeps really well.Ā  It can last several weeks in the refrigerator and be fine as long as you havenā€™t cut it. Once you cut it, it needs to be used in few days. Ā Luckily, cabbage is an extremely versatile vegetable.

Here are some of the various ways I prepared this cabbage.

Braised

I love braised cabbage.Ā  Just sautĆ© in bacon fat with onions and garlic, then add caraway seeds, white wine and apple cider vinegar (red wine & red wine vinegar for red cabbage). Cover with a lid and cook until tender.Ā  Serve with brats or sausage or a pork chop.

Soup

Cabbage is great in soup.Ā  In the winter I often make a vegetable soup and eat it instead of a salad.Ā  The original recipe I use is from Weight Watchers, but I lost it long ago, and just wing it.Ā  It has onion, garlic, celery, carrots, green beans, zucchini and cabbage.Ā  Itā€™s delicious and freezes well.

Salad

One of my favorite salads is Peanut Lime Cabbage salad from Simple Fresh Southern.Ā  The cabbage is salt wilted (chop cabbage and toss with some salt, let it sit in a colander for about 2 hours) and tossed with spinach, sections of lime, and chopped peanuts in a dressing made of lime juice, cumin, mustard and oil. I love the freshness the limes bring and the extra crunch from peanuts.

I also make a salad with shredded cabbage, shredded carrots, green onions, and bell peppers (and whatever else I have in the fridge) and cold ramen noodles in a peanut butter siracha dressing.Ā  Sometimes I add leftover chicken or pork. Excellent cold.

Yakisoba

Stir fried cabbage and other vegetables with stir fried udon noodles and yakisoba sauce.Ā  Yakisoba sauce is made of soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce, sugar, tomato sauce, a little rice vinegar, and oyster sauce. If I donā€™t have udon noodles, I use ramen noodles or whatever I have on hand.Ā  It isnā€™t true yakisoba, but it is delicious.Ā  I usually add leftover cooked pork or chicken.

Stir Fried Cabbage:

This is an easy recipe.Ā  Chop carrots, celery, and cabbage then fry in a skillet and add soy sauce and hot sauce along with some kind of ground meat.Ā  I often use ground pork.

Sauerkraut

I made two quarts of sauerkraut (with onions and carrots) from that cabbage.Ā  Sauerkraut is also a versatile ingredient.

So, what are your favorite cabbage recipes?

About The Author

Tulip

Tulip

She is mythical.

249 Comments

    • LCDR_Fish

      I think you or Tulip linked that one a few weeks ago. Used it twice to get through a single cabbage (first time i chopped mine up, I had way too much to fit in the pan, but kept just fine in gladware in the fridge. First time I used 4 strips of bacon and most of a kielbasa (added after bacon part) – and wound up a little too greasy. 2nd time I just used about 6 strips of bacon and most of the rest of my cabbage (smallish cabbage still had too much bulk to fit everything in a *larger* pan.

      Turned out better. Will definitely do again in the future. Always loved fried cabbage growing up but never thought to look up a recipe for it.

  1. Grummun

    Wife makes Colcannon, an Irish mashed potatoes dish with chopped cabbage in. Very tasty.

    Taters
    Butter
    Milk
    Chives
    Cabbage
    S & P
    Nutmeg

    • Tulip

      Ooh, nutmeg. I’ll have to add that next time I make bubble and squeak (similar to colcannon).

  2. UnCivilServant

    I think the last cabbage recipe I made was the make a macaroni salad slaw, where the cabbage provided the crunch to the macaroni salad. It worked because the base dressing/flavoring ingredients had so much overlap.

  3. Gustave Lytton

    Shredded cabbage w/ kewpie. Going to have it for dinner tonight.

    • Tulip

      Kewpie? I’m not familiar with that.

      • Tulip

        Are you in Japan?

      • Gustave Lytton

        No, but kewpie is readily available in Asian food stores here.

        They’re ruining their brand by making some versions here in the US, but commercial eggs here do not get enough carotenoids. DSM YolkFan 16 or go home.

    • Chafed

      Jesus Gustave. How much cabbage do you eat?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Not that much, but I like it shredded! No different than someone stuffing Wolfe and Subzero in their kitchen. Besides, if you’re going to dream, dream big!

  4. rhywun

    I have the gene that converts all brassica into ?.

    • Chafed

      Doesn’t everyone?

  5. DEG

    So, what are your favorite cabbage recipes?

    Whatever turns it into Sauerkraut.

    • Swiss Servator

      *sadly shakes head*

      Kimchi, or GTFO.

  6. Count Potato

    “Once you cut it, it needs to be used in few days.”

    I wrap it in plastic and it lasts way longer. Sometimes I just have to trim off the cut end.

    “So, what are your favorite cabbage recipes?”

    I don’t know if it’s my favorite, but it’s easy, cheap, and been in my family for a long time.

    Chop one cup each of carrots, celery, and onion. Sweat in olive oil. Add 4 cups cabbage. Continue sweating. Add one 8 oz. can tomato sauce, and a good teaspoon of dried basil. Stir, cover, and simmer until done.

    • Tulip

      That sounds good. I’ll have to try it.

    • MikeS

      Sweat in olive oil. Add 4 cups cabbage. Continue sweating.

      Could someone explain sweating to me?

      In the context of meal preparation, smartasses.

      • Tulip

        Cooking at a lower heat than a saute. The vegetables release moisture, hence sweating.

      • MikeS

        Ah! Thanks, Tulip.

      • Spudalicious

        What you do every time you get your fat ass out of the chair.

      • MikeS

        Whatever, fart sniffer.

      • Swiss Servator

        NODAK/IDAHO FIGHT!

        *sits back, grinning*

      • Spudalicious

        I’m the one farting, dude. On NoDak.

      • Spudalicious

        Not that you would notice the smell of sulfur and petroleum products.

  7. Tonio

    Yum.

    And yet again, yum.

    And after that, out of all yumming.

  8. UnCivilServant

    I used to hate cabbage. Turns out I hate boiled cabbage. Other preparations are just fine. But I’d only had it when we had corned beef and cabbage so it was always boiled.

    • rhywun

      But Iā€™d only had it when we had corned beef and cabbage so it was always boiled.

      Same. Plus the occasional sauerkraut.

      I will admit I can tolerate sauerkraut and cole slaw but I really don’t like the taste of cabbage itself.

    • mikey

      Me too.
      As a kid weā€™d always have boiled cabbage. I hated it then and I hate it now.

      Otherwise, I now love the stuff. Braised, slaw (vinegar or mayo), stir fired, sour kraut. Itā€™s a staple and keeps for quite awhile in the fridge wrapped in plastic wrap.

  9. Mojeaux

    Yeah, so, sauerkraut and cole slaw.

    • UnCivilServant

      Sauerslaw sounds awful.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      Wife’s got a mixup of sauerkraut, shredded cabbage and sausage she does up in the Instant Pot. Fantastic. I dress it up with mustard and some Thousand Islands dressing. Next time I’ll add in caraway seeds.

      • R C Dean

        Mrs. Dean does a kielbasa and sauerkraut in the Instapot. Served with mashed sweet potatoes. Polish peasant comfort food. One of my faves.

    • Zwak, sensual panzer

      You forgot the Kimchee.

      Go for the threesome.

  10. Spudalicious

    Sauerkraut, coleslaw, sauteed, many good uses. It makes a great stir fry, too.

  11. Fourscore

    I like to grow cabbage. Easy to grow in cool climes, although over watering can be a problem. A cabbage cut off above the first leaves will grow more little cabbages. In the fall I’ll find a number of smaller ones, some baseball size, some softball size. I plant 2-3 different varieties so they don’t all head at the same time. A Dutch flat is gigantic, 20 lbs easily and stores well.

    For eating I want fresh, in a salad or cole slaw. Cabbage rapped in newspaper will last several months in a refrig, we’ve had our own into January, I’ll harvest in October, put 4-5 in storage in the garage refrig.. Best of all, it’s low calorie. I had a cabbage salad tonight.

    Thanks, Tulip

    • Tulip

      Thank you for the storage tips.

    • Spudalicious

      I grow cabbage for kraut, and then the secondary heads become slaw over the summer. Although I’ve developed a pretty bad earwig problem with cabbage.

      • Fourscore

        I have cabbage worms, cabbage is the only thing I use insecticides on. The dust, I forget which one. I start my own seeds, often I’ll leave 2 plants together, one becomes the dominant head, after its cut the secondary head will grow better and be available later. Saves space in the garden and spreads out the season.

      • hayeksplosives

        House I had in Cali had some kale left from the previous owners.

        We loved it; ate every hit. We had to inspect and rinse thoroughly for tiny slugs though.

      • Spudalicious

        With kale, I end up with an aphid metropolis. I have to harvest what I want well before it warms up.

  12. The Bearded Hobbit

    Once you cut it, it needs to be used in few days.

    Odd. I remarked a while back that I could understand why cabbage was the choice for non-industrial people. We had a head in our fridge that lasted for several months (even cut).

    • Tulip

      Maybe it’s just me? I wrap it tightly in plastic and it turns brown in about three days once cut.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Maybe it’s the plastic wrap?

      • Tulip

        How do you store your cut cabbage?

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Simply in the vegetable drawer in the fridge.

        I’m surprised that this is not well-known. We didn’t do anything special, yet our cabbage lasted several months.

        Hence, my comment about long-term storage.

      • Spudalicious

        In a zip lock back in the fridge. It will easily last at least a week. Just trim the exposed sides.

  13. Surly Knott

    There’s an Ethiopian restaurant in East Lansing (Altu’s) whose braised cabbage is *amazing*. I have no idea what the spices are, but it’s unearthly good. Sadly, my IBS prevents me from indulging any more, but if you’re in the vicinity, it’s well worth a visit.

  14. Chipping Pioneer

    Kimchi FTW.

    • pistoffnick

      Can’t get enough of kimchi. I just bought another half gallon when I went through the Twin Cities this past weekend.

      Sadly my own is not as good as store bought. I need Mrs. Pope Jimbo to teach me how.

    • one true athena

      Biggest Napa cabbage I ever saw was in a Korean market. You could’ve carved that monstrosity into a jack-o-lantern.

      (and meanwhile I couldn’t even get my dumb bok choy plants to not bolt. very sad)

      • pistoffnick

        I also have not had any luck getting bok choy not to bolt.

      • Fourscore

        Bok choy is a really short season thing for me too. After a couple weeks of bok choy other green stuff is growing and trying to eat everything is a real chore, the bok choy doesn’t like warmer weather.

  15. Yusef drives a Kia

    Just no, Gross and slimy, I’ll go back to my hole now,

    • MikeS

      Understood. But what are your thoughts on cabbage?

  16. The Bearded Hobbit

    I grew up with cabbage rolls and love them to this day. Curiously, the mixture in cabbage rolls is the same that we put into stuffed bell peppers.

    • pistoffnick

      I used to work overnights at a group home. One of my jobs was meal prep and the dietician was a goddamned stickler for sticking to the recipes. All the residents hated Tuesday nights (cabbage rolls) before I started. They loved my cabbage rolls though. I didn’t follow the recipe.

    • pistoffnick

      Pretty sure he’s high.

      • db

        I would say so. He’s got a quirky style.

      • pistoffnick

        He’s a quirky kid.

    • rhywun

      * A proof of vaccination card or negative COVID-19 test within the last 72 hours is required to gain entry*

      [redacted]

  17. Tundra

    I love sauerkraut. I bought all the equipment after one of your articles and have yet to try it.

    Otherwise, my cabbage is limited to chopping for tacos, etc.

    Thanks, Tulip!

    • Tulip

      What are you waiting for? Get chopping!

      • Tundra

        For you.

        OK, fine. I will!

      • rhywun

        Yaaaas!

        Knew it.

      • Chafed

        I missed by a mile. I just assumed The Replacements or The Suburbs had a song with chopping in the title.

      • pistoffnick

        “…assumed The Replacements or The Suburbs…”

        *raises cabbage chopping knife menacingly towards Chafed*

      • Chafed

        I admitted I was wrong.

  18. Jerms

    I make a simple salad that is diced cabbage with lemon and a bunch of crumbled feta. A little olive oil garlic powder and salt and pepper. Cleans you out like a wire brush.

    • Tulip

      Sounds good – the salad, not the wire brush thing *shudders*

  19. Ownbestenemy

    There is a novelty restaurant in SoCal that makes a killer red cabbage salad. Pretty sure it is just red cabbage and vinegar but it is glorious.

    • Fourscore

      My wife made pickled red cabbage one year, refrigerated. By the time we ate it (a few months) it was rubbery. Failed experiment. She gave up on making kimchi as well, though she sent some to fish camp one year and it disappeared quickly.

  20. db

    I like all manner of stuffed cabbage / halupki. My GF’s aunt brought some to Thanksgiving dinner, made by her Hungarian mother, for a little variety. That was quite good. My family’s variation was less tomato-y than the Hungarian version. I like them both!

    My Mom used to make a quick dinner of sausage browned, then boiled with cabbage leaves. Kind of a really simple soup, it can be made more of a stew with less water. I think that must have been some sort of Depression-era recipe she picked up from her mother or grandmother.

  21. The Hyperbole

    Didn’t we do this before, or was that part of an unrelated thread? anyway, Haluska, fried cabbage and noodles and sausage. One of the owners of my go-to drinking establishment is of Croatian descent and they sometime (not often enough) have his grandma’s Haluska recipe as the lunch special, they also occasionally do “Sarma”, but honestly cabbage rolls are cabbage rolls every culture does one so it’s not as interesting. .

  22. KSuellington

    Cabbage slaw is really good on tacos, especially Baja style fish tacos. Thin sliced cabbage (usually purple), shredded carrot, green onion, chopped jalapeƱo, cilantro, lime juice, and salt, pepper and cumin.

  23. db

    I also love sauerkraut. One of my favorite meals of the year is pork roast, kielbasa, mashed potatoes, and sauerkraut, which is the standard New Year’s Day (and Eve) meal where I grew up. I’m not sure if that is a general tradition or just in my home region. There are a number of superstitions in my hometown about New Year’s, and eating pork and sauerkraut is one of them. Another is that a man must be the first person to enter the house after the new year turns, to ensure good luck in the new year. I learned that one from my high school girlfriend’s grandmother, who insisted that I walk out and then back in after the clock struck midnight.

    • UnCivilServant

      Once you stepped outside, did she lock the door?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        My first thought…

      • db

        Actually she had all the women follow me out, and then follow me back in.

        but, yeah, that would have been funny.

    • Mojeaux

      Kielbasa + sauerkraut = heaven

      • Tundra

        Bratwurst.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        this, with grilled onions, on a roll with Mustard, for get all the other cabbage crap rabbit food,

      • MikeS

        Indeed. For a little extra fun, add a side of spaetzle.

      • UnCivilServant

        I have two different types of kielbasa in the fridge, but no saurkraut.

        I need to visit the grocery store.

    • rhywun

      I’ve never heard of any of that. Did you grow up in rural Poland or something?

      • db

        Central Pennsylvania. But my then-girlfriend’s grandmother was pretty much pure German, I think.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        Alberta.ā€‚Ukrainian country!ā€‚Almost identical food, slightly different English spellings.ā€‚Real ditchdigger food.ā€‚Yum.

      • rhywun

        I’m watching Intervention now. Why is every episode in Alberta?

      • rhywun

        Oh, and nine out of ten of the interventions (ballparking…. I’ve seen maybe ten episodes by now) are complete failures. Oh well.

      • db

        hmm, let me see…

        Lebanon
        Bay of Pigs
        Libya
        Syria
        Yemen
        Somalia
        Iraq
        Afghanistan
        Vietnam

        What’s the successful one?

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        Those all happened in Alberta?

        Man, my knowledge of history is worse than I thought.

      • Fourscore

        We kicked ass in Grenada, 82nd Airborne got to make a combat jump and everything. Noriega in Panama was a cake walk, only 23 American GIs killed.

      • l0b0t

        Fun Fact – During Grenada, several SEALs died when they attempted a nighttime parachute jump into the ocean. Also, Army found they had no maps of the island; a platoon leader from the 82nd had to locate a payphone at the airport and call back to Ft. Bragg to obtain directions to the ambassador’s residence.

      • hayeksplosives

        Didnā€™t the delicious red wheat that grows so well in Oklahoma/Nebraska etc come from Ukrainian strains brought from Ukrainian immigrants, including Mennonite and others?

        Winter wheat is the bomb.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And Volga Germans! My people immigrated first to Canada, then moved south into the US.

  24. hayeksplosives

    I donā€™t know any name for it other than ā€œsausage-cabbage-potato skillet.ā€

    As the name implies, slice cabbage (you can halve the slices if you donā€™t want long pieces), slice potatoes or use shredded hash browns, crumble raw pork sausage, slice onion, and through it all in a big skillet to cook down and brown. Spice with black pepper and fresh ground nutmeg.

    Eat as-is or use as Bierox stuffing.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      You had me until the Cabbage, blech

      • hayeksplosives

        I wonder if you are one of those people who donā€™t like any cruciferous veggies? Itā€™s a genetic quirk that makes some people hate crucifers, just like the genetic thing about cilantro tasting like soap to some people.

      • kinnath

        I can tolerate broccoli in Asian food. But that’s about it.

      • Fourscore

        No Brussels sprouts, thank you, but broccoli and/or cauliflower raw in a salad. Please don’t steam mine but stir fried with pea pods is good, speaking of which, I like pea pods in salads or stir fry too.

      • rhywun

        *raises hand*

        Brussels sprouts are the worst but they all taste like vomit to a greater or lesser extent to me.

      • pistoffnick

        I will make you some Brussel sprouts that will change your mind. Butter, garlic, bacon, and balsamic vinegar. Come to Dooloot!

      • hayeksplosives

        I will pretend to be anti-Brussels sprouts if you promise to cook that to change my mind. šŸ™‚

        My problem with spinach and Brussels sprouts is that they were typically sold in little frozen bricks wrapped in white cardboard. The spinach looked like wet grass clippings; the texture of the sprouts was equally bad.

        Fresh (even grocery store fresh) makes all the difference.

        But I might have to lower my expectations due to supply chain issues.

    • hayeksplosives

      How ā€œthrowā€ became ā€œthroughā€ is beyond meā€¦

    • hayeksplosives

      By the way: Tulip, if you havenā€™t tried to make Bierox, I suggest you give it a go. So easy! Make a yeast dough and roll/press into squares, fill with meat/tater/cabbage of whatever you like best, fold the four corners into the center to make an X, brush with egg and bake.

      Then dip in mustard. Hot or cold.

      This is how I won my stepsonsā€™ hearts many years ago.

      • Tulip

        Sounds good – I’ll give it a try. I used to take frozen dough, thaw it and stuff with various leftovers and cheese, and bake. My homemade version of hot pockets.

      • hayeksplosives

        There are lots of recipes online as ā€œBieroxā€ or ā€œBierocksā€. My mom learned the recipe as an army wife in 1960s Germany.

        In the 1990s I always made them for the Electrical Engineering honor society bake sales. Everyone loved them but no one had heard of them. The rudimentary Internet back then turned up no results.

        Now a ton of recipes show up. Since you are an accomplished cook Iā€™m sure you could read a couple of recipes and just wing it.

  25. The Bearded Hobbit

    Kielbasa + sauerkraut = heaven

    Oh, yes.

    Mrs. Hobbit can’t take the flatulence so I have to consume rarely, and by myself.

    • Spudalicious

      Her flatulence, or your flatulence?

      • db

        Yes?

      • Spudalicious

        I’m pretty okay with my flatulence.

      • pistoffnick

        “Iā€™m pretty okay with my flatulence.”

        Smells like roses!

  26. Yusef drives a Kia

    I got nothing nice to say so I’m out, enjoy your Rabbit food…

  27. The Bearded Hobbit

    Along these lines, when growing up I detested Brussel Sprouts. I avoided them until a few years back a friend made them as part of a meal. I kept my mouth shut and, to my surprise, I quite enjoyed them. I understand that there is a cultivar that is much milder than the ones that I had as a kid.

    • Spudalicious

      It’s also based on how it’s cooked. Not too mention, our tastebuds as kids were much more sensitive than they are now.

    • Chafed

      I had a similar experience. It turns out some simple seasoning makes a world of difference.

      • hayeksplosives

        Caraway is a wonder drug for cabbage.

      • mikey

        Celery seeds also.

      • Chafed

        You are both right.

      • hayeksplosives

        True that!

    • J. Frank Parnell

      Apparently they’ve bred the bitterness out of them.

      after Dutch scientists identified exactly what made these veggies bitter in the 1990s, seed companies in the Netherlands began searching through their extensive collections of older varieties of Brussels sprouts for ones that have a lower concentration of glucosinolates. Once the most promising varieties were identified, plant breeders crossed them with newer varieties that had other desirable characteristics such as higher yields and excellent disease-resistance. The resulting varieties have proven popular with both farmers and chefs, and ultimately anyone who eats them.

  28. Chafed

    That peanut salad looks delicious Tulip.

    I don’t cook with cabbage very much. I have made cole slaw using America Test Kitchen’s recipe. It’s very good.

  29. creech

    All this Kraut talk makes me want to invade Belgium or Poland.

  30. MikeS

    Does cabbage freeze well? I know you probably wouldn’t want it in a salad after freezing, but if it’s end use would be in things like soup, or stir-fry, or similar?

  31. Suthenboy

    I will eat cabbage but it isn’t on my list of choice foods.
    Aside from asparagus, mustard greens and spinach I don’t much like vegetables that produce asparagine.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      Beet greens? Swiss chard?

    • Spudalicious

      You don’t have to be pissy about it.

  32. Mojeaux

    Got a bill for some lab work my doc did before my aborted ulcer surgery. It was itemized. Included A1c. Since they never called me to tell me my A1c was out of whack, I will assume I am not diabetic or even pre-diabetic. Yay!

    • MikeS

      That is good news! *high five*

    • MikeS

      My clinic uses “My Chart” which is nice, you can go online and see the test results practically real-time. Maybe your clinic uses it as well?

      • Mojeaux

        I’m going to call and ask. I need to get an ETA on ulcer surgery take 2 anyway.

      • rhywun

        My hospital has that or something similar. I could check all the test results from my many adventures last year. There were so many of them that I wondered if any of them were checking for stuff like the ‘beetus. I figured they would have told me about anything amiss and they didn’t so I must be golden? I dunno.

  33. Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

    Cabbage (Savoy, if you please, sliced thinly) and glass noodle stir-fry.ā€‚Works really well with chopped raw shrimp, about a tablespoon of grated or paste ginger, green onions, your favourite soy sauce, a dash of sesame oil and just enough stock (fish, crustacean or chicken) to “wet” and “transparentize” the glass noodles in the last stages of the fry.ā€‚The cabbage gets sweated first, shrimp next (briefly), and then the remaining ingredients, with the noodles going in last for only long enough for the magic to happen (they should be pre-soaked in lukewarm water for ten minutes first and cut into two-inch lengths with kitchen shears before being added to the fry).ā€‚I could eat this dish until I’m sick.ā€‚Quantities of almost everything can be “to taste,” although I do have a specific recipe which I occasionally even follow.

    In a similar vein, Haluski (Polish/Slovakian) which is basically fried cabbage and wheat or egg noodles.ā€‚Yeah, baby.

  34. Lady Z

    Oh I love cabbage, thanks for the recipes! I’m usually pretty lazy about it – I just saute shredded cabbage with onions in bacon grease with smoked salt & pepper.

    • Festus

      ^^^ mind reader up there. She forgot the fresh peas, though.

    • rhywun

      FWIW, all the headhunting I see is for remote jobs. I know if I lose my current job, I won’t even consider anything that isn’t remote. Not in the current era of stupidity.

      • db

        Neat. My Dad lived in San Francisco for a couple of years when he was in the Navy in the early/mid 1960s. He certainly saw some of the same exact sights as on those films.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I don’t go back that far, but watching the street scenes in Star Trek IV reminds me of visiting my grandparents in the Bay Area in the 80’s. Was closer to the above than what Chafed posted, at least the parts I saw and went to.

      • rhywun

        I lived there for one year in the late 90’s. It was already turning to shit so bad I moved to NYC for relief.

    • KSuellington

      Late stage progressivism.

  35. Trigger Hippie

    I like cabbage in small doses.

    Egg rolls/random Asian cuisine, Corn beef/Irish, certain Germanic cuisine…

    The flavor must be mellowed after a good boiling/steam and mixed with other tastes for me to enjoy it.

    • rhywun

      Yeah, egg rolls are one of the few tolerable applications for me. Basically, anything that buries the taste of the cabbage.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Sauerkraut is a non-starter for me.

        That being said: I just had an extremely middle aged moment.

        I’ve smoke a few bowls and had one too many beers for a Monday night so I just cooked up some munchies… I steamed a plate full of broccoli and cauliflower with black pepper and salted butter…rock & roll, motherfucker.

      • rhywun

        Dude. Bag of Doritos or GTFO.

      • slumbrew

        Crunchy Cheetos.

  36. Brochettaward

    Cabbage is an abomination against The Great Firster.

  37. Brochettaward

    With my new computer, I can First even faster. I know some of you probably didn’t think that was possible. It almost feels like a cheat. As if I needed the help.

    • db

      With computers, it’s all about parallel processing, so Firsting is an outdated benchmark.

      • Brochettaward

        You take that back! I’ll cut you!

      • Mojeaux

        LOL

  38. Timeloose

    Halushki is great. Buttered noodles and cabbage cooked in said butter with garlic.
    Egg rolls
    Sauerkraut
    German purple cabbage with caraway seeds.
    Cabbage rolls or hallupki

    • db

      whoa, did a rip in the space-time fabric bring ’80s hair metal into the 2020s?

      • db

        wtf are the words to that song–it sounds awesome but I can’t make out what I think are some of the best passages

      • Chafed

        db you have just experienced the sight and sound of Steel Panther. They are well worth a trip down the YouTube rabbit hole.

        As slumbrew said, they are hilarious and great musicians. Watch some of their interviews. They don’t need instruments or a stage to be funny.

      • slumbrew

        Steel Panther are both hilarious and good musicians.

      • Chafed

        ??

    • rhywun

      Um… OK. I would not know who he is if not for the tabloids following his various exploits over the years.

      Less than zero interest in golf.

      • Chafed

        It’s not golf that makes him interesting (to me.) It’s the off the course exploits.

      • rhywun

        TBH, I couldn’t care less about his tabloid exploits either. ??ā€ā™‚ļø

      • Chafed

        I admit I was fascinated he cheated on his wife. I think she is beautiful. Maybe it was boredom. Maybe he is just lecherous. Maybe she is a pain in the ass. I don’t care about any of it but I did have a prurient interest.

  39. slumbrew

    Does choucroute garnie count as a cabbage dish? Because that would be my vote.

    • Spudalicious

      I was going to add that, but you have to start with a base sauerkraut.

  40. Gender Traitor

    I don’t care what falls out of my ass if it’s already made the rounds, this is funny!

    • Gender Traitor

      And for the record, I use cabbage for cole slaw and tortellini soup.

      I’m going to bed now. Nighty night!

    • rhywun

      I see it’s next to the railroad tracks… please please be the Amtrak route to Wilmington.

    • mikey

      Into the recipe folder!

    • Chafed

      That looks good.

    • Chafed

      I think I’m starting to recognize some of the women.

      • limey

        I think Iā€™m starting to recognize some of the women.

        , said the eccentric financier to his trusted business associate.

        “Bring me a fresh batch!”

      • Festus

        I’m starting to recognize their lower lips.

  41. limey

    If you read anything about Jeffrey Epstein, such as any coverage of him the MSM, or his wikipedia article, they all really hammer on, and put right front and center, his “long term relationship” with Donald Trump. Right.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      They certainly were friendly to a certain extent for a bit but the relationship was superficial from what I can tell and Trump ended the relationship by banning him from his hotel complex for hitting on someoneā€™s daughter. Clinton, certain royals, and various titans of industry and technology seemed to be much tighter with him but the mediaā€™s gonna media.

  42. Sean

    Where my bok choy at?

    • rhywun

      I hope they got the right “two persons of interest”.

    • db

      How do you get shot nearly twenty times? You either get shot 20 times or you get shot some other number of times. It’s kind of quantized.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Why shoplift in Georgia when you can engage in consequence free theft tourism in California?

    • Sean

      Err…nm. Says in the article. $800.

      Need moar coffee.

      • limey

        Ha! Morning!

    • limey

      The library said the book’s overdue fees would have amounted to $800 at the 2-cents-per-day rate from 1911, but the library system’s fee policy has since changed.

      “The book was originally $1.50, so that would have been the cost we would have charged. We never charge more than the cost of the book for the fine,” Martin said.

    • Tres Cool

      sup’ cuh

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, U, homey, limey, Sean, & Stinky!

      Yesterday marked the beginning of my Hell season at work – lots of things that have to be done by year-end, then a bunch more that need to be done ASAP after the first of the year.

      Yippee.

      • UnCivilServant

        Yesterday we had another meeting where people panicking keep insisting we do something to ‘stabilize’ one of the most stable servers in the infrastructure because a human dun fucked up at the start of november. All of their options are either expensive, take vital people off the replacement project for months on end, or both.

      • Gender Traitor

        “Here’s an idea – howzabout someone back up ALL the stuff that’s supposed to be backed up on a regular basis?”

      • UnCivilServant

        The diplomatic businessspeak version of that was in our recommendation.

  43. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    *no (x)Cans for me yet. I have a doc appointment, and it likely would be best if I didnt present smelling like Milwaukee’s Beast

    • Festus

      Doc is a stick in the mud. Do better!

      • Tres Cool

        Being lazy, I havent taken the time to “prep” for my bloodwork. So they’ll a snapshot of actual conditions since in Jugsy’s absence I allow myself too many not-low-carb cheat days.
        I expect my cholesterol will be reported with an exponent.

      • westernsloper

        It’s not the not low carb days that jack cholesterol. Just being low carb will do it and unfortunately most Docs still use outdated science concerning cholesterol. Cheat days may well lower your cholesterol. My Doc said mine was borderline and if it went up he would prescribe a staten. I told him he could prescribe whatever he wanted I wasn’t going to take it. My cholesterol is fine.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Getting a spare liver installed?

      • Tres Cool

        I joke that since my body has duplicates, any organ I have two of, one is for sale.
        But DO NOT touch my liver. I need every last bit.

        Hell, my liver is so black it still rides in the back of the bus.

      • Festus

        My liver is so black that Mom makes it wear a paper bag over its head out in public.

      • Tres Cool

        My liver is so fat & black, it could have starred in the movie “Precious”.

      • Tulip

        So your liver turns you on?

      • Tres Cool

        You took that to a strange place quite quickly.

      • Festus

        But she cut to the quick, did she not?

  44. Festus

    On topic – Easy cabbage recipe. Bacon, onions, shelled green peas, salt and pepper to taste. Shred cabbage very finely, mince bacon to 1/4′ pieces, cut onion into half slices about 1/8′ thick. Cook bacon in a large skillet until crisp. Remove the bacon from the fat. Drop in the shredded cabbage and onion and salt to taste. Stir and cover, stir and cover. When the onion has caramelized add the fresh peas and cover again. After a minute or two add the bacon and fresh cracked pepper to the mix. Stir a few times and let it set for a minute or two. It’s quite delicious! All of this is done at medium to high heat.

    • Festus

      Off Topic – I’m still employed!

      • l0b0t

        HUZZAH!! Festus lives to fight anew.

      • Festus

        I had to send screen grabs to prove that I wasn’t lying about the client’s covid strategery but I managed to save my shitty job. Yay? My word wasn’t enough, I had prove it which was a pain in the ass trying to find the relevant documents. Now I’m subject to rapid testing which is better than destitution.

      • Tres Cool

        Illegitimi non carborundum !

      • Gender Traitor

        That’s great news! Are you just on double secret probation?

      • Festus

        I get the feeling that my Corp wishes that I would just go away. The beauty of it is that they have no one else. I’m a stubborn duck.

      • Tres Cool

        A former supervisor of mine was big on saying “always make yourself indispensable”.

      • UnCivilServant

        I tried that.

        It also makes you unpromotable.

      • Festus

        My days of wishing for promotion are long past. I tried that cut throat stuff and it wasn’t for me. I’m just riding it out until the inevitable. My needs are few and my tastes are simple.

      • UnCivilServant

        I apparently have a lot of expensive hobbies.

        I need the money.

      • Festus

        Yup. Learn all of the ins and outs and share the trade secrets with no one. No One! Mwuahahaha!

      • Gender Traitor

        Since I’m helping to fill in the payroll budget, I’ve already seen the evaluation scores for me and for my boss’s other subordinates without having to sit through the evaluation. We all got good scores, but mine is a fraction higher than the others. I’m dying to see on which item I scored one more point on than my co-workers. (There are only four of us.)

      • Festus

        Duh! Xe has a thing for Gingers. Who doesn’t?

      • Gender Traitor

        By rights, it should be something along the lines of “puts up with supervisor’s shit.”

      • Ghostpatzer

        Outstanding!

      • Sean

        Iā€™m still employed!

        Yay!

        Keep sticking it to the (wo)man, Festus.

      • Festus

        Even the “Men” are women nowadays. I don’t do that stuff!

  45. l0b0t

    Good morning everyone. I love cabbage. I shred it to top burgers. Also, cabbage steaks; slice the cabbage into thick rounds, salt and pepper to taste, drizzle with olive oil, and bake until crispy on the edges.

  46. Tres Cool

    Im off to let the VA healthcare system make another attempt at killing me.
    They’re certainly dragging the process out.

  47. Not Adahn

    Easiest Cabbage Recipe:

    1. Chop cabbage, put in a heavy pot with a stick of butter.

    2. Put pot over low flame.

    3. Check/stir every half hour until sufficiently browned to your taste.

  48. UnCivilServant

    šŸ™

    I don’t want to deal with any of the shit on my calendar today. I was actually making writing progress last night, now I gotta stop and argue with morons.

    • Sean

      argue with morons.

      Meh. I’m herding cats. Arguing can be a fun sport.

      • UnCivilServant

        So’s the .308 .

        So far the cheap to feed guns don’t seem to be as fun.

      • Not Adahn

        Autoloading shotguns are fun and cheap(ish). šŸ™‚

      • UnCivilServant

        speaking of, ever figure out what ammo feeds properly in yours?

  49. Ghostpatzer

    “Never argue with morons. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.”

    • Sean

      Arguing is easy.

      Supply chain issues are killing me. šŸ™

  50. Festus

    I can’t rest on my laurels just yet. Every victory so far has been a holding action. I feel like a home-guard soldier looking down from the Zeelow Heights at the advancing might of the Red Army. Quite a few of us share that same sentiment.