All Purpose Emergency Post

by | Jun 29, 2022 | Open Post | 232 comments

Well, well.  Looks like nobody submitted anything… So it’s mine!

 

In all seriousness, all you fat cats need to rise up and hand in some work to keep this place running.  Unlike a PBS station, when people stop donating we actually go off air.  There are no damn dirty commies with blank checks financing our questionable coverage.

So write!  Or Don’t!  Everything is voluntary.  But failure to act can have consequences.  Namely, you have to read my crap.

So, open post with a twist!  The snowflakes made a singles ad for Old Man with Candy. It looks like this:

The words others use to describe me are: elderly, fat, balding, and broke. But to make up for that, I have an abrasive personality, fascist political beliefs, and smell funny. I was just in a 15 year marriage to Superwoman, so you will always fall short of my expectations and disappoint me, which I will be unable to hide.

Do you have unresolved grandpa issues? Substance abuse? A history of bad choices? If yes to all of these, you have found your Mr. Right.

I’m old and decrepit, but potentially fun.

We, the island of misfit toys, must do better. Only two rules:

  • Be kind and thoughtful
  • Don’t trigger anyone or abuse your privilege.

Ha!  Gotcha! Post what you want.  But don’t blame me if you get banned today.

About The Author

R.J.

R.J.

Hello. My name is R.J. I am a Tulpa with extra cheese and sour cream.

232 Comments

  1. Don escaped Texas

    napping in a GA hotel watching Sloopy troop around SAT

    RJ: what part of TX ?

    • R.J.

      Dfw

      • Don escaped Texas

        I lived in Colleyville for 20 years: good place to raise kids

      • R.J.

        I was also napping.

  2. DEG

    We, the island of misfit toys, must do better.

    Honestly, I couldn’t do better than that

    • Chafed

      I can’t tell if this will blow up on unqualified buyers or the lender first.

    • Rat on a train

      How about interest-only balloon loans?

      • UnCivilServant

        I have no interest in balloon loans.

  3. Mustang

    Today I learned .gov is trying to transition the entire Federal vehicle fleet to electric as fast as possible. I can’t wait until all of the patrol vehicles run out of charge mid-response. The current argument is whether or not they should purchase the vehicles first in order to justify buying the charging stations, or vice versa.

    I was literally laughing out loud in the meeting, clown music running through my head. So glad I’m getting off this Titanic.

    • Sensei

      In urban areas with lots of idling an EV wouldn’t be bad. Much lower operating costs.

      In rural and cold and rural it’s an awful idea.

      • rhywun

        Turn those rural areas urban, duh. One size fits all FTW. It’s the American Way.

  4. Count Potato

    I have a a folder full of half-written shit, but I’ve been at the hospital for around eight hours each day for the last several days.

    • Festus

      Sorry.

    • Tundra

      Any change?

      • Count Potato

        She’s getting better, but I think being away from home for so long is wearing on her. It’s been three weeks now. The results from her cardiology tests show that her heart had not changed much from before the surgery. It did show a bit of scarring from silent heart attack (this sometimes happens when old people are asleep), but no coronary artery disease, or at least nothing obvious. So the congestive heart failure was likely due to temporary ischemia (loss of blood to the heart due to the stress of surgery). Which is good news. Although she is still on heart failure medication. I spoke with the hospital cardiologist today, but I haven’t spoken with her regular cardiologist since her last test. Her lungs are clear, pulse ox is decent, and she has much less, but still some edema. So now the next step is getting her into appropriate rehab for her hip fracture which started this whole thing. Apparently, and unfortunately, it has more to do with insurance and what makes the rehab center look good than what is best for my mom. I’m expecting I might have to do some arguing tomorrow.

      • Tundra

        That actually sounds pretty good.

        Definitely advocate for her. There are a lot of people here that can help you.

        Praying for mom. She sounds like a tough chick.

      • Count Potato

        “Definitely advocate for her. There are a lot of people here that can help you.”

        Oh, I definitely have been and will continue. I had suggested earlier that she might have congestive heart failure, and they just ignored me.

        I don’t know who here can help me though.

        “She sounds like a tough chick.”

        LOL, I don’t think anyone has called her that in a very long time.

      • Tundra

        She’s still here!

      • R.J.

        I wish you luck arguing with insurance tomorrow. Very glad your mom is getting out of the woods. The potato family must endure!

      • Count Potato

        Thanks 🙂

      • slumbrew

        Agreed, that sounds OK, all things considered.

        Keeping your mom in my thoughts.

      • Count Potato

        Thanks 😉

      • DEG

        This is good.

    • DEG

      Sorry.

    • Count Potato

      Thanks to everyone for your condolences, thoughts, prayers, etc.

      • Count Potato

        It honestly does mean a lot to me.

      • Tundra

        Please. For a group of people who cosplay as misanthropes, I have found this freak show to be filled with some of the kindest, smartest and reliable people I’ve ever come across.

        Tell mom we’re gonna make inappropriate jokes once she’s better!

      • juris imprudent

        Harrumph! I do NOT cosplay. I do make exceptions in my general distaste for humanity.

      • Chafed

        I’m not waiting (provided it makes CP laugh).

  5. Festus

    My timing is terrible (dead thread). I just tottered out and hung the Flag upside down for Canada Day. I love this country but it never seems to love me back. Fuck it.

    • The Hyperbole

      Plus you’re drunk as fuck.

    • whiz

      Prepare to have your bank account frozen. (JK, I hope.)

      • Lackadaisical

        Jokes on them, then.

    • slumbrew

      Strike fear into the heart’s of your neighbors with your nonconformist ways!

      It is better to be feared than loved – fear lasts longer.

      • slumbrew

        You sound particularly down, Festus – feel free to vent, even if it’s just existential angst.

        No judgement here.

        (unless you want pineapple on your pizza – that’s right out)

    • DEG

      Sorry Festus.

    • Tundra

      Doesn’t matter. There are a fuck ton of Canucks who feel as you do.

      • rhywun

        There are a fuck ton of Canucks who feel as you do.

        👍🏻

        ’Muricans too.

      • Tundra

        Right! I thought that was implied, though.

  6. juris imprudent

    OK rather than attempt to help OMWC get some, I’ll work on my article. Happy now?

    • R.J.

      Yes!

    • juris imprudent

      Okay, done and submitted for review and scheduling.

  7. Brochettaward

    You people clamoring for more articles always fail to mention the greatest incentive there is which is that the only way you can get The Bro to First on your article is to submit one.

    I can’t First what aint there. Think about it.

    • Tundra

      That would be tragic.

    • Gustave Lytton

      First your own First post. Losers wait for others to do the real work so they can First. You’ve probably got a surrogate doing the heavy lifting for your “own” First, I bet.

      • juris imprudent

        Well then he’d be emulating ol’ Fist of Etiquette which would mean he wasn’t even being an original firster.

  8. whiz

    Eclectic taste in movies, don’t even think of getting him to watch Jaws.

    • pistoffnick

      Likes Old Man music.*

      *I have to admit the Peter Green song he linked caught my fancy.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Sheepbutting your audience? That’s just mean.

    • R.J.

      True. I apologize.

    • juris imprudent

      A true Scotsman would be sizing her up.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    How about balloon auto loans for, naturally, EVs.

    “As my old Grandpa Litwack said, just before they sprung the trap, ‘You can’t cheat an honest man. Never give a sucker an even break, and never smarten up a chump.'”

  11. The Late P Brooks

    I just tottered out and hung the Flag upside down for Canada Day.

    It’s a good thing I have neither flag nor pole. The temptation to do that would be much too great to resist.

  12. cavalier973

    I was listening to RLM discuss the last two episodes of “Kenobi”, and started thinking about how I only consider stuff in the first movie (“A New Hope”) as canon. I don’t accept that Darth Vader is Luke’s father, for instance. Anakin was killed by Vader, just as Ol’ Ben says.

    Now, it’s possible that Vader is a clone of Anakin (they reference “the Clone Wars”) and thinks he’s the real Anakin, or something.

    Leia is not Luke’s sister, either. Star Wars is about the farm boy who rescues the princess. Classic tale. The farm boy marries the princess and becomes king. That’s the story.

    Based on the attitudes of everyone around Vader, I also dispute that the Emperor is a Sith Lord, or even someone gifted in the Force. In the council on the Death Star, one of the guys tells Vader he is the last relic of an ancient religion, and Vader doesn’t respond, “Oh, Yeah? What about the Emperor, snotnoggin?”

    It’s been less than twenty years since the fall of the Republic, but everyone seems to consider the Force a weirdo old-times thing that people used to believe in. Luke has never heard of it. Han Solo seems to only vaguely know about it. The Imperial magistrates openly mock Vader for believing in it. Maybe the Emperor suppressed use of the Force somehow, but allowed that weird cultist Vader to practice it, since he seemed competent in getting things done in service to the Emperor.

    • slumbrew

      What I’m hearing is “the Star Wars movies and series are poorly written and inconsistent, with the writers just making shit up as needed”.

      • R.J.

        Might as well make Spaceballs canon. It’s better than some of the new stuff.

      • cavalier973

        The original Star Wars was a boring movie that was edited really well.

      • Chafed

        You are correct, sir!

    • rhywun

      Enh, the trial run for Star Wars – THX-1138 – is a better movie anyway. No sequels. No mythology to keep straight. Just great visuals and mood. And quotes.

    • Count Potato

      “Leia is not Luke’s sister, either. Star Wars is about the farm boy who rescues the princess. Classic tale. The farm boy marries the princess and becomes king. That’s the story.”

      In a galaxy far far away, Tatooine is Mississippi.

      • cavalier973

        Is it legal in Mississippi for a man to marry his widow’s sister?

      • Count Potato

        “If you can’t keep it in your pants, keep it the family”

      • Rat on a train

        The dead can’t marry in Mississippi.

  13. straffinrun

    You all are already completely fucked having seen your digital footprints. May as well traipse all over the white carpet with your cow turd caked shitkickers.

    • R.J.

      Please! It’s human turds for those who live on the West Coast.

      • Gustave Lytton

        The warming weather is frangrentizing le urban aroma.

    • slumbrew

      Whatever, Fed.

      *checks VPN connection*

  14. slumbrew

    To the problem at hand:

    If I was any good at writing personal ads, it wouldn’t have taken until my late 40’s before I got married.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    The power of filthy lucre compels thee

    Carol Sanger, a professor at Columbia Law School, says it is also important not to discount the anti-abortion movement’s deep pockets. Thanks to donors such as the billionaire brothers Charles and David Koch, there was no lack of funding, she says.

    “That’s a failure of the progressives not to have had [their] own Koch brothers,” Sanger says. “[But] I don’t know how you get [your] own Koch brothers.”

    Andrea Miller, president of the National Institute for Reproductive Health (NIRH), agrees. “This really was about the degree of funding and diligence and focus,” she says.

    The anti-abortion rights campaign “had multiple layers and was exceedingly well funded and well executed,” Miller says.

    With enough money behind you, you can do anything. It doesn’t matter what. It doesn’t matter why. Money is mind control.

    • slumbrew

      I like how David Koch is still a boogie-man from beyond the grave.

      That’s a failure of the progressives not to have had [their] own Koch brothers,

      That’s just some hilarious bullshit right there – quick, name 5 non-leftist billionaires! Now 5 on the left…

    • rhywun

      a failure of the progressives not to have had [their] own Koch brothers,

      LOL

      Yeah, there are no rich leftists. 🙄

      • Count Potato

        That is rich.

      • one true athena

        Or a lobbying arm for Planned Parenthood.

    • Mustang

      Soros wonders what he’s got to do to get some credit from his supporters…

      • MikeS

        And Bezos, and Gates, and Branson, and…

    • Urthona

      Did the Kochs really even give a shit about abortion? I don’t recall that.

      • Lackadaisical

        One questions what funding pro life people needed anyway. The leftist brought the court case. Unless they meant getting trump elected.

  16. R.J.

    STEVE SMITH HELP!

    OLD MAN SEEKS CAMPERS
    TO GO ON DATES TO FUTURE CASCADIA
    BY DATE MEAN…..

  17. db

    guess the zoom’s not a thing right now?

    • R.J.

      Don’t know? There was a link last post. I am a tad sleepy and so have not tried.

      • slumbrew

        Working for me.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    The NIRH’s Miller also concedes that the messaging could have been better. “I actually think ‘safe, legal and rare’ was a mistake,” she says, referring to a slogan picked up by then-candidate Bill Clinton in 1992.

    There was never any reason to stigmatize abortion, Miller says. “The reality is that there has always been a need for abortion, regardless of whether it’s legal or not.”

    Yes. Go with that.

    • rhywun

      That wingnut Clinton could never get elected today.

      • Chafed

        In all seriousness, it’s a shame. That was one of the best things he said.

    • J. Frank Parnell

      Yes, the catchphrase that they focus grouped the fuck out of and which succinctly represents the opinion of the overwhelming majority of normies out there was bad. They should totally go with something like “Abortion is awesome and fuck you if you don’t think so.”

      • Chafed

        Lena Dunham agrees.

    • R.J.

      “ At midnight Bauman was awakened by some noise, and sat up in his blankets. As he did so his nostrils were struck by a strong, wild-beast odor, and he caught the loom of a great body in the darkness at the mouth of the lean-to. ”

      Hillary?

      • MikeS

        Michelle.

  19. cavalier973

    Speaking of Mississippi, a guy once related a local urban legend to me. Outside New Albany, there was a fruit stand on some back road. It was based on the honor system. You picked the fruit you wanted, then put money in a box on one end of the stand.

    The stand was owned by a special forces guy who was a sniper in Vietnam. He was touched in the head, and would hide in the woods surrounding the stand. If you took fruit without paying, he would shoot it out of your hand.

    The end.

    • slumbrew

      Too good to fact-check

    • cavalier973

      Also, speaking of Mississippi, they have a regional thing in the states’ as northern towns that I call “squish burgers”. I think in Corinth they call them “slug burgers”. In Tupelo, they have the “Dudie Burger Festival”. Also in Tupelo, on the east end of Main Street, is Johnny Burgers, where Elvis Presley sometimes are as a boy. At Johnny Burger’s you can get a Johnny Burger or an “all meat burger”.
      So, basically, it is thin, fried meatloaf patties on a bun.

      I don’t like them.

    • cavalier973

      Also speaking of Mississippi, I’ve visited every town mentioned in “O Brother, Where Art Thou?”. Yahoo City is a very pretty town, as I remember.

      A town not mentioned is Aberdeen, which is the title of a song covered by Kenny Wayne Shepherd.

      I accidentally wound up there a couple of times, and it was like Disney’s “Main Street, USA”, except that the buildings were actual size.

      • R.J.

        That’s really cool.

      • cavalier973

        I used to sell vinyl siding for Sears, and they would send me to give a “free estimate” to houses that were worth less than the siding job.

    • Mojeaux

      Hey, he spelled “brunet” right.

      • rhywun

        And “straight” wrong.

        /I want a cigaret

      • Mojeaux

        LOL didn’t even notice.

      • pistoffnick

        /I want a cigaret

        Are you sure you don’t want a bundle of sticks?

      • Mojeaux

        Ouch.

        The more important question is if the cigaret actually identifies as male.

      • cavalier973

        It’s transpipe

      • MikeS

        I replied to your reply in the dead thread.

    • slumbrew

      5’4″, 180?

      • MikeS

        You could say she’s got it all.

      • MikeS

        You could say he’s got it all.

      • rhywun

        🤯

    • Tundra

      5’4 and a buck 80?

      Are you Tres?

    • Lackadaisical

      5’4″ 180?

      :O

      Someone needs glib fit

    • Mojeaux

      Do none of you read? That’s a DUDE.

      DWM == Divorced White Male

      • UnCivilServant

        Not the department of waste management?

      • Mojeaux

        Well, I mean, under certain circumstances, maybe.

      • R.J.

        Divorced Woman Moloch?

      • pistoffnick

        Someone knows an awful lot about personal ad acronyms…

        /squints suspiciously at the aspiring odalisque.

      • Mojeaux

        I’ve read Tres’ Craigslist hookup ads. I’m an expert now.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, no. He’s quite erudite about it, almost morning-time Agile Cyborg-ish before AC’s evening descent into chemical enhancements.

      • Tres Cool

        I knew there was a reason I felt an immediate connection when I read his work back on TOS.

      • MikeS

        I knew that.

      • slumbrew

        I’m well aware.

        He’s a little tub of goo.

        Or an actual fire hydrant.

      • slumbrew

        Worse – the height is surely exaggerated and the weight understated.

      • slumbrew
      • J. Frank Parnell

        Wow, check out the biologist over here.

      • DEG

        You beat me to it. That’s what I get for sleeping.

    • whiz

      LOL

    • Chafed

      I can’t believe that got published.

  20. trshmnstr the terrible

    In line with the theme of the article, go over to the forum and contribute to the GlibFin Article prompt. We need more than 3 people and a cryptid in this one.

    • Rat on a train

      Live below your means, avoid consumption debt, save when you can.

  21. EvilSheldon

    Would there be any interest in a short piece on buying your first AR-15, and not ending up with a piece of crap?

    • UnCivilServant

      Yes.

      Also, I’ve found that, in general, the answer to “would there be any interest” around here will be a yes.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Second the yes to whatever anyone else is interested in. If it’s not someone’s cup of tea, they’ll just go off topic. Or even if it is.

    • Negroni Please

      Yes

    • Drake

      Oh yeah.

    • pistoffnick

      YES!

      Although I prefer the AR-10. It has 5 fewer ARs, and, therefor, is less lethal. ;^)

    • MikeS

      Absolutely. Especially if it has pointers for those with the capability to do some DIY.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Follow up requests for bargain basement, accurized, ar pistol, and variants.

    • Chafed

      Yes and keep in mind some of us are interested but know nothing about the topic.

    • DEG

      I built my first AR. And so far it’s been decent.

      But, yeah, write a buying guide please.

      • Lackadaisical

        I want your article on making one too. I love projects and ghosts.

  22. Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack

    I’m dromk.

    P.S. I don’t see anything wrong with an open post now and again. Shit happens. That being said, I have 1 or 2 things in the pipeline. It’s just that I’m so dromk.

    • UnCivilServant

      Well, don’t relocate your home until you sober up.

    • MikeS

      I don’t see anything wrong with an open post now and again.

      Agreed. Especially on ZOOM!!!11 nights.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I just put up a thing for the Editors, so there,

      • MikeS

        Bob! My wife and I both bought a starter disc set, and I scored a basket off CL for $65. Been doing some practicing in the backyard. Hope to go out for my first official round this weekend.

        Is your story on the night gold tourney you just had?

      • Chafed

        Did you get deicing solution too?

    • Lackadaisical

      Pulling off sad and cute at the same time is tough for girls, I’m impressed.

  23. Mojeaux

    @MikeS, those things we take for granted when we’re kids, amirite? I did that PM “Jesus Loves Me” when I was a teenager and gave it to my favorite teacher, so…40ish years ago. And now that you mentioned it, I don’t know what I did with my childhood stocking either. My mom made that out of felt. She was an elementary school teacher and she was making them with her class, so she made her, my dad, and me one too. My brothers were not around then. When I got married, I made new stockings.

    • Mojeaux

      The stockings I made are on this page.

      I made my mom a stocking, but it’s for show, not for actual use.

      • MikeS

        Those are great, Mo’. The best part of them is there is love in every stitch. 🙂

  24. Gender Traitor

    Given the reaction to my “torture” comment this afternoon, I’m half afraid to say ANYTHING to this crowd. 🙄

    At least the early morning pre-AM Lynx crew sympathized with my dental plight. 😞

    • Chafed

      What happened?

      • Gender Traitor

        I got two temporary crowns on adjacent lower molars this morning. Not too bad, considering. My mistake was in saying something here later about “getting my mouth tortured.”

        I. Should. Have. Known. Better.

      • Chafed

        Oof. Just because you didn’t hear someone say “feed me Seymour” doesn’t mean it wasn’t torture. I hope you are feeling better.

  25. dbleagle

    We raced over to Kauai last Friday (official distance 105 miles) and did pretty well being the first to reach the finish line. It took 12h37m and we won the Barndoor prize and 3rd overall after corrections. The conditions were great for our return on Sunday which took 16h31m. The strange thing happened yesterday when the Coast Guard called all the skippers in the race and asked if we had seen “a floating body” west of Oahu. “Ummmmm, noooooo.” was our reply. Apparently, a man took a small boat out over the weekend and has not been seen again.

    Kauai’s economy is in the toilet. They embraced da VID craziness even more than the rest of the state and many businesses have folded. Rental cars are running $300/day for a compact and places to eat are scarce. Luckily we could sleep on the boat and have been to Kauai before so we had no interest in renting a car.

    • Ozymandias

      Congrats, DE! Nice sailing.
      My friend sold his place on Kauai just before the vid nonsense. Man, he *just* got out in time.
      I gave up my condo on the Big Island because of Hawaii’s requirements to visit.
      No, thank you. Who could have predicted making it miserable for people to travel there might lead to loss of $$?
      (I think there’s an Iron Law about that)

      • dbleagle

        Mahalo Ozy. You can fly from the US w/o testing now but flights from elsewhere still require testing. More and more residents have discovered that if you never test for da VID you never get da VID so some sanity is beginning to return.

        We had one person test positive for monkeypox so the freakout machine is firing up from gov officials again.

      • Lackadaisical

        ‘You can fly from the US w/o testing now ‘

        How was that ever legal?

        I wonder what housing prices have done in Hawaii.

    • PieInTheSky

      Sailing is the decadent indulgence of the oppressed. Have you checked your privilege this month?

    • Tres Cool

      When I was doing a job for the Bureau of Printing and Engraving, I was told they accidentally let out $30 bills. $10 on 1 side, $20 on the other.
      As the freshly printed sheets of currency come out, there’s a line of people performing “physical inspection” where they look for flaws. Only they see only 1 side of the sheet at a time. It goes to the end of the line, gets flipped, and moves back to the beginning. They had no idea the printers made an error.

      • DEG

        Good enough for government work!

      • UnCivilServant

        That’s not a $30 bill, that’s a $15 bill.

    • rhywun

      I have one.

  26. Sean

    Mornin Glibs.

    • DEG

      And in the Northeast.

    • PieInTheSky

      Hang On A Minute Lads, I’ve Got A Great Idea!

      (no one will get the reference)

  27. Festus

    Forced retirement, neurological problems, wrassling with the government and a step-son that won’t stop being 15 years old have taken a toll. Shit gets real when you can’t physically fend for yourself anymore. That’s why I don’t comment much except for the odd sniper shot. If things get better I’ll be just as much as a loudmouth as I was before. It’s bleak but I’m always here, Glibbing with my friends.

    • Sean

      Seriously, go rub one out. Just don’t think about me.

      *waves at Festus*

      • Festus

        Don’t know how to take that, Friend.

      • Sean

        I mean, you could think of me, just don’t tell me about it. *shrug*

      • Festus

        Just a year ago I could rambol and gambol with the best of them. Now it feels like I’m watching the game. Not fun.

    • PieInTheSky

      can you still have the occasional beer?

  28. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    • Sean

      Dude!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Two things:
      1. At least it won’t taste like all their other food which tastes the same.
      2. Yuck

    • PieInTheSky

      The meal layers ground beef, sour cream, tomatoes, lettuce and cheddar cheese on the cheesy cracker for $2.49. – is this cheaper than pharmacy laxatives?

  29. Tres Cool

    I think I saw Whistling Scrotum open for the Dead Kennedys once.

    • Festus

      Around here we call that “Blowing a Heef”.

      • Tres Cool

        From your nutsack? You canuckians are assembled differently.
        Must be the metric system.

  30. Tulip

    Daily Quordle 157
    7️⃣4️⃣
    9️⃣5️⃣
    quordle.com

    • The Hyperbole

      5️⃣7️⃣
      4️⃣6️⃣

    • Grosspatzer

      Daily Quordle 157
      8️⃣5️⃣
      3️⃣7️⃣
      quordle.com

    • Not Adahn

      Daily Quordle 157
      4️⃣6️⃣
      7️⃣5️⃣

      True story: I mistyped a guess and it solved the UL. UL is not really a word.

    • Festus

      Sandpaper Sally? Everyone has tasted her wares.

    • Festus

      Nah. Namesake would go up and rub against it. He’s not that bright.

    • Festus

      Seems to me that all New Hampshire politics comes down to “Death By Sununu”.

    • Lackadaisical

      What’s wrong with a realistic show? None of those people would have black friends.

      • UnCivilServant

        Because the creator is stuck in the hollywood bubble.

        They need to be put out of our misery.

      • Grosspatzer

        I am eagerly awaiting the apologies from the creators.of Sanford and Son, another sitcom with a notable lack of diversity.

      • cavalier973

        At least “The Jefferson’s” had that British gent

      • Tres Cool

        aka ‘Steptoe & Son’

      • Rat on a train

        More apologies for the Cosby Show?

      • Tres Cool
    • rhywun

      OFFS.

      “I have paid my indulgence. Now leave me alone already.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Go fuck yourself Marta.

  31. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates!

    • Tres Cool

      suh’ cuh

  32. Grosspatzer

    Lovely morning, and thanks for adding Pneumoscrotum to my vocabulary.

    • Grosspatzer

      Meant for Tres

    • cavalier973

      When gas builds up in the scrotum. Don’t try the “light my farts” trick.

  33. cavalier973

    I hear that the Supreme Court is about to eliminate the FBI.

    • Grosspatzer

      Or, maybe the FBI is going to eliminate the Supreme Court? I just read something like that recently…

      • cavalier973

        With pillows!

  34. Gender Traitor

    ***SIGH!!!*** The sad saga continues.

    So…true confession: I wear an anti-snoring dental appliance. Didn’t even think about it when I had the temp crowns put on my teeth yesterday. Last night as I put the appliance on/in, I thought, “Gee, I’d better be careful when I take this out in the morning.” I was, but the obviously TOO temp crowns came out with the appliance. So it’s right back to the dentist… after dropping my Subie off for its 60,000-mile service.🙄

    • UnCivilServant

      I think a few nights of snoring might be the better outcome at this point.

    • Grosspatzer

      Aargh! Hang in there, GT.

      My new dentist has a 3D printer, for most crowns there is no need for a temp, they just print one up in about 20 minutes. Got one Tuesday, another one coming next Tuesday.

    • Lackadaisical

      sorry to hear. I hope the saga ends soon.

    • Tres Cool

      You know who else wore an appliance to prevent snoring?

    • Sensei

      Fingers crossed they don’t tell you the Subie is due for its obligatory head gasket replacement at this particular time.

      • Tres Cool

        + engine out