Note: The YouTube link for this commercial went dead, but you can watch it at the following address:
https://www.ispot.tv/ad/7nfu/subaru-trying-new-things
Still unsettled from the hot springs foursome with the overweight desert couple, Jim and Jane drove in uneasy silence.
“We shouldn’t have done that,” Jane whispered again.
“We shouldn’t have done that,” Jim agreed. He thought about the hairy maw between to the woman’s legs and the unfortunate glimpse he caught of the man stubby penis being awkwardly jabbed into Jane’s mouth as she cried.
“Stop the car,” Jane said. Jim grunted.
“STOP THE CAR!” Jane screamed.
Jim slammed on the brakes and the Subaru screeched to a halt. Jane scrambled out and began vomiting, bug parts and rank, yellowed semen spraying forcefully. Jim noticed dully that her heaving was oddly timed to the beeping the car was making for the door being ajar.
“Get it all out, baby,” he said. He ignored the rush of blood into his sore penis as he listened to her. He had hidden his emetophilia their entire marriage.
Jane stood up and spat and gagged and then spat again.
“Do we have any water?” she asked hoarsely. Jim rummaged behind her seat until he came up with a bottle.
“Sorry, it’s warm,” he said, leaning over to hand it to her.
With shaking hands, she got the top off and took a long drink. She turned to the side as the water came right back up.
“Just wash out your mouth, maybe,” Jim said. He rode out the glare she shot back at him with a weak smile.
Jane rinsed and spit and rinsed and spit. Jim ground the heel of his hand into his crotch, forcing his erection down the leg of his pants. She threw the empty bottle into the scrub by the side of the road and got back in.
“You OK?” Jim asked.
“No, but I’ll live,” she said. “Drive. Just drive.” She pulled the door shut and the dome light went off.
Jim took off too fast, the tires spinning in the loose gravel and dust of the road shoulder before the car jumped forward onto the road. They rode in a grim silence.
After a few miles, Jim ventured: “Scuba diving and falconry. Logrolling and bug sushi. Lots of new things we tried today.”
Jane coughed and shook in her seat.
“What?”
“I know something you didn’t try,” Jane said laughing.
Jim laughed too.
“It tasted worse coming up than going down,” Jane said.
“Don’t try and tell me anything about something tasting worse,” Jim said. Jane howled with laughter.
“I’m going to brush my teeth for a week when we get home,” he said.
She waved at him to stop because she was laughing so hard and slapped playfully at his arm.
“Oh god,” she said, leaning over to hug his arm when she got her laughter under control, “I think peed a little.” She rubbed his thin chest through his shirt.
“It’s getting dark,” she said.
“The day of trying new things is over,” Jim said sadly.
She sat up and kissed his cheek. “It doesn’t have to be,” she said.
“It doesn’t?” he asked in mock innocence. He looked down at her, but her eyes were locked on the road ahead.
“Hold on,” she said and jerked the wheel to the left with her free hand. There was a meaty thump from the front bumper.
“What the fuck?” Jim shouted and hit the brakes. “What was that?”
“A coyote, I think,” she said. She ran her hand down his faded erection as the car stopped and then trailed it along him as she undid her seat belt and slipped out of the Subaru.
“Where are you going?” he yelled but she only laughed.
He put the car in park and looked ahead of them and behind them and didn’t see any lights of approaching cars. He got out and walked back to where she was standing in a pool of light from her cell phone.
“See? I told you it was a coyote,” she said. She sounded giddy.
Jim looked down at the mangled form in the road, bloody and twisted. Its back was bent the wrong way and its belly had burst. More intestines and organs were trailed out on the asphalt than he thought could have fit in the skinny little body. He bent over to get a look at the tongue hanging from mouth. An ear twitched and he jumped back.
“It’s not dead,” he said.
“Nope. He’s a tough little fucker.”
“How is he not dead?”
Jane began to circle the coyote, snapping pictures to get from every angle.
“I guess I should get a rock or something,” Jim said. The bug sushi was threatening to come back up on him as well.
“Don’t bother,” she said. She walked back toward the car and squatted down, trying to capture the trail of blood and viscera leading to the coyote.
“Step away, babe, you’re in the shot,” she said.
“The smell,” Jim said. He stumbled to the brush beside the road and swallowed hard a couple times.
“Go check on the car,” Jane said. “I just want to get a few more shots for Instagram.”
Jim walked away on stiff legs, his hands beginning to shake. He turned on the flashlight app on his phone and inspected the front of the Subaru. There was a streak of blood and half of one of the ears was stuck in the grill.
“Doesn’t look too bad,” Jane said right beside him and he had to stifle a scream. It came out eek eek eek, like rubbing a blown up balloon, and he sat down hard from his squat.
Jane laughed at him and helped him to stand. As he brushed himself off and tried to regain some dignity, she worried the half ear out of the grill.
“You ready?” she asked. He nodded.
After getting back in, he sat for a moment to let his hands stop shaking.
“You OK to drive?” she asked.
“Yeah.”
“The day of new things,” she said as he started driving. She fished around in a sack of trash from the back floorboard and came up with a hamburger wrapper. She folded it around the half ear tenderly and tucked it into her purse.
She snuggled up to him again and kissed his cheek. He could smell the vomit on her breath.
“Let’s find something bigger,” she whispered.
“Don’t worry, I got him with the door” Said the Priest to the Trucker, thanks for the memories SF….
First?
I’ve learned my lesson. You are an evil genius of a wordsmith. I’m taking a hard pass.
Twice in one day.
I….I…..just cant.
Some things man was not meant to know.
No one can.
Seriously. What in the living fuck did we do to deserve this?
You didn’t find barfing up fat trailer trash guy cum and bug parts particularly soothing and comforting?
I am amused by the fact that none of the rest of you have commented on the clear implication that this Jane is about to trade emesis enhanced sex to Jim for his cooperation in adding some more bipedal ears to her road kill collection.
Quadrupedal.
The half-gallon of shitty beer was a nice treacle for the sting of reading that.
HEY YUFUS!
Sup Tres!
I always drink a gallon of shitty Beer, I’m American!
Jesus. I thought YOU made up the bug sushi. Seeing some old dude’s crank is easier than eating bug sushi.
Worst food truck ever.
So a literal “roach coach”?
They look like enormous jar flies. Jar flies on sushi rice. Barf.
Also, I know it’s fiction but I feel bad for the coyote.
#metoo
I thought she was gonna pop the ear into her mouth like a canapé.
*retch*
I thought she was going to make him go STEVE SMITH on the coyote.
Too obvious.
“As yet there is no evidence this person is a Trump supporter or motivated by Trump. And yet “maga bomber” the number one trending topic on Twitter. Weird. I don’t remember “socialist shooter” trending when Scalise was shot.”
https://twitter.com/conservmillen/status/1055227679753027584
She’s not wrong. Also, don’t read the rest of the thread if you want to maintain any kind of faith or hope in humanity.
Too late. I’ll be needing another drink.
#metoo
Fuck I hate people, sometimes.
Good thing this is still okay.
Go watch Allie’s parody Vote Democrat commercial and you’ll feel better.
SF is on a cosmic roll. Bug sushi, ewwww!
Shrimp?
Exactly. Ewww!
That is a crustacean, sir, not a bug. A delicious crustacean.
Water Bug, Sorry………………..
And I try so hard to give ya’ll class and taste.
Gratifyingly tame and yet even more disturbing than your usual fare.
Where did you see ‘tame’ ?
“…and began vomiting, bug parts and rank, yellowed semen spraying forcefully.”
Well, no suppurating sores or gaping cavities or beaked or prehensile sex organs, no child sacrifice, no desiccated corpses dissolving into the surf, no wang totems.
But yeah, that line made me think of Jennifer Connelly.
chyme does not actually work that way
Hey, no one died and there was only implied weird sex.
The fuck you talkin about?
/Wille E. Coyote
Wile E’s Brother?
I feel something has changed within me. With each episode of Subaru Horror Theater, I enjoy them more and more. I found this one…very…pleasurable.
So does anyone know the Dakota quarantine protocol?
ship em to Minot.
I liked it. I think I know that chick.
9/10
I noticed that the stock market has taken quite a tumble this month, so I took a peek at 401k earlier to see the damage. It was too back. YTD I’m down 3% but am still up 14% over the past 12 months. Whatever. I’m in this for another 30 years or so, so I dont worry too much about short term gains and losses. It is what it is.
I was curious about why there has been such a great drop, so I did a little googling and read a few articles from different financial publications. Each one pointed to several different factors. Tariffs, the midterms, housing prices, etc.
I’m sure there is something to all that, but not one of the articles I read mentioned the elephant in the room. The FED. My understanding is that the FED is slowly starting to sell off its TARP assets in an effort to get interest rates back to a more normal level. This is part of the correction for the huge balance sheet expansions it had after 09. There is no mention of this in any of the articles I read. I don’t think that this is an insignifigant factor, and probably should be mentioned as one of the root causes for falling prices. But, what the hell do I know.
Narrative
The Fed is all wise and all knowing and its actions never have negative consequence.
I think you hit the nail on the head. It’s out of bounds to criticize the root cause of problems. Our media betters are only allowed to talk about symptoms.
Did any of them mention sentiment and tradition? Today was the 89th anniversary of Black Thursday.
The last media story about the great crash… was that last year? Anyway, it supposedly wiped out a year of gains. I typically do not even look at my investment portfolio. But because of that, I took a peep. I must be a genius without trying much, because when I looked, I had not only lost nothing, but gained a lot, even though a little down from the 6 months before that.
This time I’m not even looking. Who stands to gain right now from media reports saying all our stock gains since Nov 2016 have been wiped out? That’s all I need to know.
My gf is drunk arguing with her sister on her cellphone. FML.
?
Pics or it didn’t happen.
Video…
The drunken thing often works in my favor. ?
As sad as it is, I’m just happy my wife no longer talks with her insane sister.
But, don’t let any drunken special other go to waste, get her off the phone now!
Fwiw, I got the smarter/hotter one. Thank G-d.
Oh, me too. One of the problems with my wife’s crazy sister is that she’s jealous as hell of my wife for being the pretty one.
So you are saying you are open to a three-way?
Who wants to disappoint two women at once?
I keed I keed!
We all do.
Ugh..I’m gonna have to weigh in again. She’s on a tear tonight..
My wifes little brother is a 27 year old who rarely works and still lives with his mom. About once every couple months I get to be sucked into the middle of my wife blowing up on him for not getting his shit together. I feel you man.
HUZZAH! My BiF box was waiting on the porch this evening; thank you very much to beloved Glib Nephilium. I’m enjoying a delicious Barrel-Aged Blackout Stout from Cleveland’s Great Lakes Brewing Co.
I already drank all my BiF. 🙁 it goes so fast. You got to cherish them.
Burp.
Hope you checked the bottled year on that one before hand…
Jealous, at You Neph,
At me? Just because I have a large stock of BA Blackout (it’s named after the great blackout, not the effect it has after you drink several pints of it) from years past in my cellar?
I did and it was yummy, thanks again. It was quite smooth, the Bourbon comes through but was not dominant.
ERMERGERD SKOOL CHOYS BAAAAD!
https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2018/10/how-high-schools-shaped-american-cities/573616/
The issue of school choice really shows the Left to be NPCs.
“Sure they fail at their expressed purpose, but think of the extracurricular activities and other trivialities we’ll lose!”
Yea, that was a particularly derp-rich sample.
Social events and sports competitions can never happen without mandatory government schools, apparently.
The second school choice is achieved the American landscape will be naught but windswept rumble and cannibalism, this is known.
Charter Schools are actually abattoirs that supply the evil 1% with the human veal they so strongly crave.
So did having only three TV networks.
Schools suck at education and most kids hate and suffer through it, but at least you can relate and commiserate to Freaks and Geeks and Fast Times at Ridgemont High.
There are a lot of people for whom the typical school was a nightmare. Bullying, social anxiety. Leftists are usually more aware of that, but have tossed it out because they hate Devos.
I liked school. Everyone should experience it just like me, just because.
“In 2016, shortly after she was appointed to the position, U.S. Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos declared American public schools a “dead end.”
Betsy is right.
And despite mountains of evidence to back her up, progs had aneurysms when she said it.
My grandmother is a retired public school teacher. Mentioning DeVos has that effect.
One, single, collective aneurysm.
GovernmentPublicindoctrination centersschools are their life-blood.It’s true. The Teacher’s Unions launder more money to the DNC than any other group.
I hate how the Left is so intent on preserving the status quo of the education system – both K-12 and college.
That article seems to admit that the K-12 education system sucks, but they still oppose opening up private alternatives because “muh societal cohesion” or some shit.
That and they’ll lose their near-monopoly on training up good little collectivists from the age of 5
Not to mention all that sweet teacher’s union cash.
“I hate how the Left is so intent on preserving the status quo of the education system – both K-12 and college.”
But not surprising at all. The forced indoctrination of our children at the earliest age and for as long as possible is their most effective weapon. The media is a distant second. You replace public education and take it out of the firm grasp of the left and they are completely and irreversibly fucked.
ex-Ms TresCool was a dyed-in-the-wool member of the NEA, teaching High School english and BritLit. And constantly bitchin about salary, hours, etc.
It didnt take long after we parted ways, that she got knocked up. Once her kid hit school age, she suddenly found herself teaching in catholic school so her kid got a “private” education for free.
Pics?
Oddly, she was ‘High School Teacher by Day’ and ‘amateur boxer by night’.
And rich socialists live in gated communities. Amazing how that works.
So, she is basically playing the “Muh Kullektiv!” card.
Screw her with old HS janitor’s cancerous dick.
I think the Subaru Horror Theatre stories are just so clever. I really enjoy them (horrifying though they are). The inside of your head must be a terrifying place, SugarFree.
I expected STEVE SMITH to make an appearance during the coyote road kill.
Howard Stern interviewed Ozzy Osborn once not long after their shitty reality show was on. Noting Ozzy was drinking, Howard asked him ‘why? After so many years of sobriety, why?’
Ozzy said, “spend a day in my head”
I bet it’s Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood in SF’s head. He sends these little tales out on the toy trolley for the rest of us to suffer, and then he sits back, stretches his toes out in those sneakers, and just deadpans the wall for ten hours.
Nah. He’s probably the most well adjusted freak of all of us. All the brain spiders get stomped through his horror scribes.
It’s the seemingly normal ones I’m concerned about.
https://archive.is/2jDCP/1c8c416e26ce9524c5c72b21dac20ce7d6536967
Yes, exactly.
You seem fairly normal.
See?
It’s the seemingly normal ones
Other than me who the fuck around here is seemingly normal?
*drops gloves*
Let’s go, Hyp!
As a seemingly normal person, I’m not so quick to resort to fisticuffs.
C’mon! It’s fun!
You do realize those aren’t the gloves he’s dropping.
/cautiously raises hand
/looks around room
/puts down hand
So we should all be in fear of Tulip?
I’m watching you.
Yeah, I’m pretty disappointing in person. People expect a monster and get a middle-aged archivist instead.
Depends on the archive now doesn’t it!
SugarFree lovingly caressed the baby vellum scroll. “Not yet my precious. Not yet. On the day the Vessel spews forth Hillary’s dark Master I will share your secrets.”
Turning slowly, always widdershins, and holding the Talisman of Neutral Purification in his sinister hand he muttered the calming charm “Cannabis fueled Mexican Ass sex, cocktails and fruit sushi” as he slid the Lexicon Voynicate R’yleh into it’s silver chased lead tube and affixed the golden Seal of Solomon.
Yeah, no, nothing that exciting.
I am currently processing a collection of aluminum transcription discs, and that’s pretty neat. Not many of those survived being melted down for aircraft parts during WWII.
Interesting how much of that sort of thing we basically threw away in wartime. There are a LOT of books that were in print before the war that never reappeared afterwards (or not until OCR tech got decent) because the plates were ‘recycled’ into war materials. “Oh we don’t need the plate, if there is demand we can always reset it”
Especially transcription discs. They were one-offs, not pressings. When they were destroyed they were often the only copy (or the master recording.) The aluminum ones were rugged. Most transcription were lacquer, acetate on glass, or various other types of plastics. They shatter and/or delaminate very easily.
The funny thing about the aluminum ones… you couldn’t use steel needles, you played them with needles carved from coconut shells.
Didn’t someone shoot you once?
Yeah, but it was an accident. I didn’t earn it.
“It tasted worse coming up than going down,” Jane said.
See, that’s why you drink bum wine. It tastes the same in both directions.
I’m sorry to keep harping on this, but I still can’t buy a Hat and Hair mug. It still bounces me back to the store’s main page.
Sorry, this is the first I’ve seen this. I’ll try to figure out what’s going on.
It’s capitalism. Only the wealthy and connected can get Hat and Hair mugs. Fucking capitalism.
Well, I have the answer, but I can’t fix it tonight. CafePress flagged the image as something that might be under copyright to someone other than us. This is deeply irritating.
I’ll have to email with them tomorrow and get them to release the image for use.
Send them a link to some of your writing.
But I want to buy a mug, not get the store shut down.
But I want to buy a mug, not get the
storeinternet shut down.FTFY
Thank you!
It’s called the “Decency Clause”
For the record, the bomb looks like someone wanted people to know that it was a bomb and for the attempt to fail.
jim@njslea
@njslea
Replying to @thomasbsauer @MattWalshBlog
They do not if you do not want them to detonate, BUT, want them noticed. This appears to be for “media affect” vs “dramatic outcome” time will tell.. Prosecute all involed
Yep. Except, of course, no one (DNC, CNN) will ever be prosecuted because of it.
I’ve found a picture of the real life Hyperion, with an explanation no less.
So the bomb had an ISIS flag painted on it? There must be someone making noise about getting the U.S. out of the middle east. The country needs a little manufactured fear to keep its eye on the prize.
Who paints something on a bomb that is supposed to blow up when you open the package? Maybe you needed it to not blow up so CNN could take a picture?
Someone who wants to make people think that there is a real danger of terrorism that needs to addressed in the most statist manner possible.
hearkening back to the age of ‘reaching across the aisle’ when the great alliance of team purple ruled *barf*, I would assume just that. But now in these better days of right vs left in a war to the death, I don’t think so.
If it were like that, the GOP and dems would have united to pass more far reaching 2nd amendment violations when Scalise was shot.
That didn’t happen, thank the invisible sky gods, because those times are over.
Fucking Nazis, that’s who.
No. That turned out to be fake.
It’s the meme parody version. You can see the figures in the middle instead of arabic writing if you compare it.
But it definitely still goes with the “wants to be seen, not blown up” angle. Someone really, really wants it to look right-wing. Whether it is, I don’t know, but they didn’t seem to want to actually kill anyone, at least.
I know SugarFree could do a helluva lot better than these clowns.
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/23/books/review/trumps-next-chapter.html
That’s funny. Political porn to keep the spirits of the #resist crowd up.
It seems you need to constantly prop up the emotionally fragile.
The comforting fantasy that the Russians are behind it all.
TS:DNR (Too stupid, did not read)
Based on the picture, I’m guessing Trump is going to burn the White House down. Literally. Right before Mueller and his crack team of investigators can haul him off to jail.
C’mon Kiké!
Uh…
Puig gets it done.
Uh…
You’re right. It was a Senseless Offering https://youtu.be/fZ2dm_oNGis
You need to do a podcast in your ‘free time’. I have never come across anyone with your musical excellence.
/fan
How flattering. But a heads up; will be adding a decent batch of songs to Jangle Noise soon. Rock n roll from Cleveland circa 1968, C86 stuff, noise from Chicago, jangle pop from San Francisco, jangly Australian stuff, even some jangly punk from Milwaukee circa 1988. Plus some other stuff. Also, Hole.
Follow my Spotify playlist Jangle Noise. Over 9 hours of jangly guitars and scratchy guitars from all over the rock n roll landscape. https://open.spotify.com/user/egould310/playlist/20QahoaMym4xptW1UNzNpk?si=4CkrV0WeQZG5RQ3fRwaZ1Q
But no Church. Definitely on the psychedelic end, but they keep making amazing jangly, trippy guitar-fueled awesomeness. Your list, but they might merit a song or two.
Some good stuff there but I don’t Spotify so I couldn’t see the complete list.
Some For Against came up on my iPod the other day and I thought it would be ideal.
Re the Church: challenge accepted! It’s gonna involve the Church, Love & Rockets, New Model Army, Fields of Nephilum, the Cult, and more. Gotta do some research. Thanks for the suggestion.
The Alarm, the Mekons, The Smiths, Orange Juice, The Call, Last Stand, Lords of the New Church, etc. Yeah I’m getting an idea.
Go Spick?
Shut up, you wetbacks and gooks.
I’m German Irish
Shut up, you KrautMick!
OK, I’m not, but I love that movie.
OK, I was going to admit I’m Welsh, but you lied to me and now you have forfeited any jokes about me having a goat.
Well, the Kraut part is true, so only a half lie. So I offer half an apology, you woolyback.
“woolyback”
I’ve never heard that before. I’m impressed. I think.
SP says that a lot.
Judging by online porn everyone would think there is a missing ‘me’ in there.
Hey guys in New York… the Prohibition Party is back. One of the original progressive ideas, back in the modern day.
Considering a lot of progs have descended into neopuritanism they just might have a future. They could combine with what’s left of the Moral Majority and really screw us.
This was my biggest fear for a long time. And it seemed it was all coming together. But then the left went too far and the right invented the meme. We are saved, for now.
Maybe but I’m going to start hoarding old car radiators and copper tubing just in case.
Good lord. I see they support other “progressive” junk, too.
Because it is so popular and worked so well last time. Go for it.
OK..so at the federal level, prohibition aint gonna fly, cause they revoked that.
So, in an argument for 10A and state’s rights, how do Glib’s feel about each state having a vote on whether they want an alcohol ban or not ?
Of course I’m all for it. there is nowhere where it will come even close to passing. In the meanwhile, 3 cheers for federalism.
And if they did manage, dear God, the money that could be made.
Under the express terms of the 21st Amendment the States have full power to ban alcohol. No 10th Amendment argument needed. The 21st basically exempts alcohol from the commerce clause:
The transportation or importation into any State, Territory, or possession of the United States for delivery or use therein of intoxicating liquors, in violation of the laws thereof, is hereby prohibited.
I was looking at the issue from the other side of states legalizing marijuana despite a federal ban.
Louisiana already does that on a parish by parish basis. It works…sort of.
Arkansas as well. I think about half the counties are dry. I dont see where it stops a single soul for imbibing though. It is a lucrative gig for rent seeking liquor store operators with stores on the county line.
States have powers, people have rights.
That’s one way of looking at it.
What about the part where the government murdered citizens by denaturing alcohol? Those people probably deserved, huh?
+15,000 benzene
Like Rethuglicans being chased out of restaurants, they were asking for it.
“Fuck off, slaver!’ is another. These people are evil.
Progressive: “Demon Rum destroys lives!”
“So let’s kill people to stop them from drinking”
Classical Liberal: “That is immoral, expensive, demeaning to the citizens you are treating as children, and simply won’t work. Why not put forth your ideas about the dangers and evils of drink and let people choose?”
Progressive swinging axe: “You promote sin! God hates sin! You hate God! Die!”
CL: “Basic Christian theology posits that God allows evil precisely because He gave us free will and wants us to freely choose virtue over vice, because forced virtue is not…” gurgles as axe strikes.
Why does spell check flag axe? ax is not more correct.
“National Prohibition brought about the largest reduction in drinking in our nation’s history”
I bet that data was super accurate. Everyone will willingly admit to stuff they can be arrested for.
When did prohibition end? As far as I can tell, the war on (some) drugs is still alive and well.
The FDA has often been asked to define alcohol as a drug.
They decline to comment.
Alcohol, is of course, a drug. But it’s my drug *crickets*
Honestly, I wish they would. If you wanted support for a real end to the WOD, get alcohol classified the same as PCP.
Damn, those are some strange chick names.
She snuggled up to him again and kissed his cheek. He could smell the vomit on her breath.
“Let’s find something bigger,” she whispered.
-Absolutely beautiful, SugarFree. Speaking of which, I spent some of last week to finally read up and catch up on all of the H&H and Hillary, The Becoming series. Truly powerful, hard-hitting tour de forces. The Presidential Campaign Coverage almost sent me to the hospital multiple times. BRAVO!
I eagerly await your next Old One-inspired work, Dr, SugarFree.
I always pictured him as German – Herr Professor Doktor SugarFree. Makes it more sinister.
I can follow that, this is a good head-canon.
TV just showed a 102 year old lady – Red Sox fan who got out of the hospital yesterday and insisted on going to the game tonight. Badass.
based af
She won’t be around if there’s another 86 year drought.
It’s been a 5 year drought
I’d be more impressed if she was at a Patriots game in December.
Emetophilia. Well I learned a new word today.
I want to kiss your vagana for 2 hours and then put my 1 feet pinus in your vegana, you will happy?
Wrong window, dude.
Fuck.
Show me bob and vageen.
vageen
Ok.
I LOL’d – Roberto is great.
Roberto IS great. However, I can’t help but wish they’d gone with Sid the Sloth, for the added discomfort of using children-focused animation.
But, that’s just me.
LOL
Good one. Like
I struggled not to laugh my ass off just now. Thank you.
Never mind that shit; look at the pic I found at that link!
Vag-etarian.
FDA will regulate tobacco products, despite there being an Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms agency
But they wont touch alcohol.
https://www.fda.gov/aboutfda/transparency/basics/ucm194879.htm
THE FDA NEEDS TO REGULATE GUNZ! FOR THE CHILDRENZ!
https://archive.is/7j6G3/57e8a3a7e2d7aec0130e9932590cbe252f6dc7f6
https://archive.is/7j6G3/3b422df8213762a4dac736f92cbdfa4e0322cab6
https://archive.is/7j6G3/3f53a65f244bcdb72856b93cf8dbecdf72ff6a84
https://archive.is/7j6G3/cf88e80ac7f339471556767901c0c3db84aacd4a
https://archive.is/7j6G3/c996f54c6aa30d6ea6c6c9314226163d21fdd823
Winner.
I hate myself for googling “emetophilia”.
On my Latin base I’m gonna guess puke love without looking it up . ?
Yeah. I’m just gonna hurll this one out there; don’t look it up.
Meh, of all the crazy things I’ve run into on the internet that is actually quite quaint and restrained.
I’ll show you “quaint and restrained”!
We’ve got a relinker here! Let’s get the Glibstoppo over here!
Re-linker! Who the hell….
I can’t be expected to look at all the links/stories/sundries around here. I’m strictly nighttime, dude!
I think it was in Official Afternoon Links. Which means you’re shirking responsibilities.
Oh, no no no no…. Afternoon Links suggests sunlight (at least, in this part of the country), and that ain’t my bag.
Plus, how would you know? You burning the candle at both ends?
Look, all I’m saying is, pick a time of day, and stick to it. And, since you do very well here at night, there’s your solution!
Now, excuse me-I have to post more
stupidfunny links.I see it as my Glibertarian dootie to check all threads. If you don’t see it that way, we can always deport your ass to TOS! Build The Internet Wall!
TOS? Harsh, brother.
Harsh.
A guy I worked with at my job in HS had a poignant thought one morning, “How come your own farts don’t smell as bad to you?” There is the trillion dollar question we need the Government to find the answer to.
The next DARPA project, for sure.
I mean, I think that’s the ONE thing a totally free market in science wouldn’t look into, therefore it should be bankrolled by government. I mean I can see rich weirdos who get off on funding how shrimps react to cocaine, but I really think this could only be funded research by the government.
Hint: They find it AWESOME!
Then again, so did shreeky.
By the way, I’m not going to animate these or the Hillary stories, I know everyone doesn’t want to go blind.
Going blind would be a relief.
Everyone doesn’t want to go blind. Everyone has things to do.
Thank you for your good judgment.
“The Ropers”… on the list of the worst TV spin-offs? HORSESHIT!
Norman Fell was an American treasure, dammit! And, Audra Lindley? Pure screen gold, my friends.
Also, if your a thicc fan, I found her in my YT recommends list.
Enjoy. Or, don’t. I’m not your boss.
I stopped at 25. The best moment in all of Saved By The Bell was on :The College Years. Bob Golic (who played their RA) Talked to Screech about tattoos. Bob had gotten a Tweety Bird tattoo on his ass when he was young, but now it was Big Bird. THE BEST MOMENT in Saved By The Bell.
#Truth
The last season of the Dukes of Hazzard would count. When they replaced the Duke boys with some cheap ass imitation cousins. That fucking sucked, even at 8 years old I knew that.
Ugh…”cousins”. If they aren’t part of the original story, do NOT bring cousins into show. Period.
into *a* show.
Hosh Meadows’ radio show “It’s A Jangle Out There” is live, on air from Australia on 94.9 Main FM, and on the internet too, right now. Listen in on the Tune In app. Jangle, pop, noise, shoegaze, folk, and Australian accents!
Josh Meadows. Not Hosh. This bourbon is working
Anyone up ?
I had something up a little while ago, but my first cup of coffee made it go down.
Pro-tip: Do not spill hot coffee first thing in the morning.
Chi-town? central time, right ?
CDT, because we’re communists and need light to feed our tractors.
That extra hour of sunlight is burning muh crops up.
I’ve been up for a while, but I just got to work, so now I have time to comment here.
I’ve been at work, but I wasn’t up at 4:18 this morning. I slept in a little today.
I just got home from work, wifey went to work, I got kid 1 off to school, getting kid 2 ready to go, then it’s my blessed day off (beer… and lawn work).
I’m up and making breakfast. Running a bit late today, which means I’ll probably work from home.