“Oh, God, I’m taking your AR-57!” Beto cried out as Cory rammed into him over and over again. “Give me your AK! Give me your AK!” His Austin drawl was muffled by the rabbit head he was still wearing.

“I’m going to BUYBACK YOUR SEMI-AUTOMATIC COCK!” the Texan screamed as Cory filled him with his hot intersectionality. Beto then ejaculated himself, his prostate clenching like an angry fist.

Cory groaned and shuddered and shook like a tased gazelle as he fell sideways off Beto, his penis sliding out with a slithering gargle. They both lay panting in the shredded remains of Beto’s costume, their converted shipping container love nest ticking and clicking as it cooled in the Iowa night.

“You know I have to drop out of the race soon,” Cory said quietly when he had finally caught his breath.

“I know,” Beto replied. “Six days, right?”

“Five now.”

Alpha

“I could give you money,” Beto whispered. “My wife has plenty.” He had made the offer before.

“No,” Cory said. “If America isn’t ready for a black President, I’m not going to be able to overcome their racism with more money.”

Beto rolled over, farted a little semen, and ran his hand over Cory’s smooth chest. “We run together, then. We’ll join campaigns.” He nuzzled Cory’s ear and said breathily, “I’ll be your VP. I love being under you.”

“No, it would never work,” Cory said, wiping himself off on the crumpled bedsheets.

“Black man, white man,” Beto said. “More powerful together. A chocolate and vanilla swirl of Executive leadership.”

“It’s been done,” Cory said.

“Not with a real American black man,” Beto protested. “And I’m am Latinx! Viva la Texicano! Er, I mean, ‘Viva la Texicanx!’”

“But would it be enough to lock up the Black and White Hispanic vote?” Cory asked. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Then come out!” Beto said excitedly. He climbed out of bed and took off the giant rabbit’s head. “Actually black and gay? So intersectional! They couldn’t criticize you then.”

“Then I jeopardize the Black vote. And I couldn’t do that to Rosie anyway,” Cory said. He got out of bed as well. “Where are my clothes? I was supposed to be out on a run.”

“Rosie’s just a beard. She’s getting paid well enough,” Beto said. “Did you have to shred this?” he asked, handling up the rags his rabbit costume had been reduced to. “It was my favorite.”

“You know how I get, baby,” Cory said. “I see you on TV in those mom jeans and I just got to have you.”

“Oh, you,” Beto said affectionately as he squatted over a bucket and shat into it noisily.

Beto

“Five days,” Cory said sadly. “I didn’t even make it to the Iowa caucuses.”

“Come out and we’ll run together,” Beto said excitedly. “Black/white, gay/straight, butch/furry. We’ll be a tornado of intersectional fury!”

“Straight?” Cory asked, laughingly.

“I have a wife and kids,” Beto said as another hissing spray of santorum came out of his ass. “Of course, I’m straight.”

“Oh, sweetie,” Cory said as he crossed to the gangly Texan. “I just love you so much.”

Beto smiled and took Cory’s half-hard penis into his mouth.