China Denies Weaponizing Virus No One Has Heard Of
BEIJING – A spokesman from the Chinese Ministry of Foreign Affairs condemned rumors that the Chinese military weaponized Mongolian Yak Herpes, a disease unknown to science until this morning. The spokesman elaborated that the virus most certainly was not deliberately created at the Sum Ting Wong Disease Research Center in Wuhan. The spokesman then ran in circles around the podium with the other four spokesmen, sat down, and was replaced by another spokesman. In any case, according to the 2nd spokesman, it was all a long time ago and it never happened anyway. Besides, continued the 3rd spokesman, what about the appalling rates of obesity in the US, especially amongst impoverished Negroes residing in so-called food deserts? Such a thing could never happen under the system of Socialism with Chinese Characteristics. The 4th spokesman then ripped up a Tibetan flag and kowtowed to a giant portrait of Xi Jinping. In response, the NBA now requires all players to carry a copy of Mao’s Little Red Book at all times, and all future games will begin with a playing of the March of the Volunteers. Some experts have speculated that such a disease could have originated from an incident when Genghis Khan had sex with a herd of yaks to win a bet. This is why the banner of his horde had nine bands of yak hair, one for each yak. Chinese officials have repeatedly stressed that even if someone is infected with Mongolian Yak Herpes, they will be healthy again an hour later.
Hail to the Grand Helmsman Mao and His Glorious Successor Xi!
Wan Sui! Wan Sui! Wan Sui!
And hail to the Great Chinese 5G Cellphone Corporation Huawei!
Huawei! Huawei! Huawei!
This looks familiar. ?
That’s what I get for reading something I’ve already read. First loser.
Right? People, save your A list matriel for the articles.
Bravo!
And I still think Mongolian Yak Herpes is an awesome band name.
You’ve never heard of them, they’re pretty obscure.
Now that I have heard of them they are sellout posers who suck.
Their first album was pretty great. You should link me and we can talk about this later.
Winston wins the Internet.
Pretty much.
Yeah, I was into them a few years ago, before they got all big and commercial.
Their B side stuff is better.
I have the box set.
“Nothing is good if other people like it”
All Hail Zardoz! Oh wait…
Nevermind.
Back to Dem Primaries:
The Bee is killing it again.
https://babylonbee.com/news/biden-your-mother-was-a-hamster-and-your-father-smelt-of-elderberries
LOL
Biden hasn’t said anything that coherent in quite a while.
And even if he does, he’ll never top Corn Pop, so he might as well retire now. His value as accidental court jester is over.
*shakes pool chain at Hyp*
IT’S NOT OVER YET
*Whips pool chain double-dutch* “Come at me Corn-Face!”
Shut up, you lying dog-faced pony boy!
*uncontrollable laughter*
Did you say “Pony boy“??
C’MON FAT, COME OVER HERE AND STROKE MY LEG HAIR. WE’LL SEE WHO’S THE DUKE OF THIS CARNIE PARTY
even more
Sure, Pooh Bear, we know you did it. Problem is, you didn’t know they have no Mongolian Yaks in the West. Typical commie dumbfuck.
In other news, this may be the greatest thing I have read today. It may be the greatest thing I have read this year.
Crissy Poo loses that tingle
“We need look no further than the reliably partisan Chris Matthews at reliably partisan MSNBC. A former speechwriter for Jimmy Carter who served as chief of staff to former Democratic House Speaker Tip O’Neill, Matthews reached a nadir of despondency after Biden’s debacle last week in Iowa. In a panel discussion following Friday night’s debate in New Hampshire, Matthews went on a rant against socialism, recalling his Cold War–era visits to Vietnam and Cuba: “Being there, I’ve seen what socialism is like. I don’t like it, OK? It’s not only not free, it doesn’t freaking work. It just doesn’t work.” As his fellow MSNBC panelists looked aghast, Matthews continued, saying that if “the Reds had won the Cold War, there would have been executions in Central Park, and I might have been one of the ones getting executed, and certain other people would be there cheering, OK?”
When you’ve lost Chris Matthews, you’ve lost Urban elite America.
Wow. A brief moment of lucidity.
Gulag Barbie and Crissy Poo cage death match now! My money is on the harpy.
Six minutes of lucidity
I expected no less.
Ted has my quiet approval.
Executions in Central Park? Bernie Bros feel the
Berntingle!Grampy got into the whiskey again. Christmas is cancelled.
Whoa. Chris must have a terminal illness, because I’m pretty sure that’s gonna get him whacked.
Chinese fire drill at the podium?
Is that racist, or do we get to hate the Chinese for killing off humanity? We get to hate whites for inventing slavery when Columbus rolled up on the New World and used his knowledge of germ theory (probably appropriated from the Arabic world, let’s be honest) to subjugate the natives and Latinx peoples of color. So we should get to throw a little shade at the Chinese for global genocide.
So, Yang is out.
Womp womp.
Forgot to include: fuck him in his UBI.
Andy, we lost him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=544KJ06R2K4
?
The UBI might be the least bad of the bad ideas the Dems are floating.
That is very faint praise.
Only if it replaces all other government payments. Which it would not.
UBI instead of version would be an improvement, just like VAT instead of version would be an improvement. But does anyone seriously believe we’d get ‘instead of’?
He dropped out?
“Suspended”. ?
Just in case some more money comes in.
You mean from the debates?
No, he “suspended” his run. Same lame euphemism they all use.
Ah, I see.
Yes, and endorsed Sanders, apparently.
So, the super intersectional woke ass democrats are down to zero minorities now? Makes sense.
Wow, I didn’t see that coming.
So he was a shithead after all.
You’ve never seen “The Sixth Sense”?
The worst part of Yang dropping out: this will disappear into obscurity
What happens in ManchVegas stays in ManchVegas.
Oh my God.
Someone described it as thus:
I wouldn’t want to hang out with Trump, but he’s doing OK as chief executive.
I would love to hang out with Yang but there’s no way I want him as chief executive.
What even in the fuck…
The best part is the look on his campaign manager’s face (I assume that’s who that is). It’s like straight out of The Office.
https://twitter.com/mikereedschmidt/status/1225434716410609665
Inspirational.
Here’s to the black market!
We could kill a few more guys standing around selling loosies, that should solve the problem.
Well, I have one thing to say about that. What kind of pet shop is filled with rambunctious yahoos and hot jazz music at 1:00 in the morning?
Everybody knows pet shops are filled with electronica anyway.
Uh… the best damn pet shop in town?
?♂️
@handleofavandal
Replying to
@mikereedschmidt
and
@mooncult
may i suggest a lethal chokehold on the shelf?
Derpy, you are a very funny man.
I was driving to see a client this morning and stopped at a traffic light in Balmer. Looked over next to me and I see a cop car with ‘Health and Wellness Police’ emblazoned on the side. *shudder* Can you even think of anything more terrifying that a visit from the ‘Health and Wellness’ police?
You sure you hadn’t stumbled into a movie set for Brazil 2?
I was on the set of some dystopia, but it’s called Baltimore.
Don’t let them see the nutrition argument from last post. SWAT teams would get called.
Have you seen The Wire? That place is a shit hole!
I didn’t have to watch a show to find that out.
Poor Balmer, you can escape from LA, and you can escape from NY, but only the Colts ever escaped Balmer.
+5 Mayflower vans
Brazil 2: Brazil Harder
“Lick my Buttle, Mr. Falcon”
Hope you put down the turkey leg for a second…
That is genuinely frightening.
Sailors, fuck, i just play with Catamarans..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5554FxUXwg
One of the big racing cats used in the Thomas Crown Affair remake used to charter out of Martha’s Vineyard for a while.
I always loved that scene (although I, too, never noticed there wasn’t a sheet on that winch until now).
Rene Russo > boats
She is teh sexy in that movie.
So, Yang is out.
Womp womp.
Saw a Business Insider thing earlier, about layoffs, backstabbing and confusion in the ranks.
Next time, mebbe.
Maybe his staff of color started walking out, like Liz’s.
https://tenor.com/view/sayingtheresachance-chance-yeeeah-jimcarrey-gif-5169610
So, I finally got around to unpacking the stereo equipment tonight, and it turns out the CD player didn’t survive. RIP.
I’m assuming literally anything I buy to replace it is going to be great?
First of all you have to tell us what a CD player is?
Something to do with a cross dresser?
Probably a thing they did back in the 19th century before computers were invented, called a board game and it had cross dressers.
It’s what hipsters listened to before vinyl.
I’m pretty sure there was nothing before vinyl. Just the empty void.
CDs nutz! As the kids would say.
What doesn’t it do?
A top end replacement should cost you about $49.95.
I’d get a blue ray player that also streams Netflix and pump that bad boy through a Pioneer receiver (or similar).
No, he “suspended” his run. Same lame euphemism they all use.
Something to do with campaign finance laws, I’d guess.
He ran out of money. Hasn’t been getting his UBI lately.
I bet there’s no “suspended campaign” tax category, for example.
Said it before but I’ll say it again. Derpy is the mole.
Related: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rc5G04nJecI
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
Big hard throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters wanting to be fucked
Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
On their knees wanting to suck Glibertarian cocks
Glibertarians.com really rocks
Hot hard buff Glibertarian commenters, their cocks throbbing hard
Eighteen more wild Glibertarian commenters out in the yard
Big bulging cocks ever so hard
Orgy in the comments at Glibertarians.com
Big hard throbbing cocks ramming Glibertarian butt
Like a breeding ram wanting to rut
Big hard throbbing cocks getting sucked real deep
Glibertarian commenters even getting fucked in their sleep
Glibertarians.com, it rocks
Glibertarian commenters love big hard throbbing cocks
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
Big hard throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters wanting to be fucked
Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
On their knees wanting to suck Glibertarian cocks
Glibertarians.com really rocks
Hot hard buff Glibertarian commenters, their cocks throbbing hard
Eighteen more wild Glibertarian commenters out in the yard
Big bulging cocks ever so hard
Orgy in the comments at Glibertarians.com
Big hard throbbing cocks ramming Glibertarian butt
Like a breeding ram wanting to rut
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
Big hard throbbing cocks wanting to be sucked
Eighteen naked Glibertarian commenters wanting to be fucked
Glibertarian commenters in the comments at Glibertarians.com
On their knees wanting to suck Glibertarian cocks
Glibertarians.com really rocks
Big hard throbbing cocks, getting sucked real deep
Glibertarian commenters even getting fucked in their sleep
Glibertarians.com, it rocks
Glibertarian commenters love big hard throbbing cocks
Seriously, is ANYONE going to click that link?
Only a Tulpa would click that.
If they are, I got some nekked Lena Dunham links for them to click.
Its a YouTube link, theres no nudity. Well, no “human” nudity anyways.
I see you and raise you 20.
Its clinical, totally sterile.
Or will be after the post op infection
Fine.
You want my livefeed? You get my livefeed.
I guess I just had that one coming.
You’re an Asian guy talking about his glans being too small?
Yes.
You fiend!
WE’VE ALL HEARD RAM RANCH, GRAMPS.
You big homo
phobe.
Orgy in the comments at Glibertarians.com.
tl; dr
From there, youtube suggested this
I realized that I had both videos playing at the same time and it is the most metal shit I have seen.
That’s the cutest goddamn thing.
Pretty good. Even though neither instrument was plugged in.
Everything’s wireless these days.
I thought it was ball-bearings these days.
What did your Father do to you and why are you acting this way? Show us on the pan-sexual doll, HM. Don’t be scared…
He bought me Hydrox instead of Oreos. All the fucking time.
Hydrox sucked dick.
I can’t even.
I…I don’t know what “hydrox” is. Is that some sort of bleach cookie?
I think it’s Kosher crackers. It’s something coastal. Nobody here ever heard of it.
It’s like an Oreo but with more flavor.
Please, Hydrox versus Oreo was Yugo versus Cadillac.
All those double-stuff Hydrox… Fudge-dipped Hydrox… Golden Hydrox… Hydrox Thins…
We only got Hydrox when they were cheaper than the yellow and white “Sandwhich cookies”. Hydrox were the gold standard in my house growing up.
I’m just spitballing, here, but wouldn’t it be better to wait until you had a cure before you set your not-a-chemical-weapon free?
“It was to be announced at the Party Congress on Monday. As you know, the Premier loves surprises.”
Killing off a large fraction of the chinese population is a feature, mot a bug.
Well Xi does love Mao. Except for the whole killing his sister and sending him to live in a cave.
They had no choice. The one child thing went badly and now restless young men can’t get a date. Reset time. The wonders of communism never cease. No wonder everyone here under 20 wants it.
Who says they didn’t have a vaccine prepared and shared by the party elite already?
Damn. We lost Michael Bennett too.
Where was the last place you saw him?
Trying to find anybody that would listen to his ideas for his Presidency.
Who?
Doesn’t matter. I wanted that hippy chick, Marriane to win. She was the only good one, she would have been fun.
About thirty years ago but, yeah.
#metoo
“I wanted that hippy chick, Marriane to win.”
Hippychick
“It was to be announced at the Party Congress on Monday. As you know, the Premier loves surprises.”
“Gee, I wish we had one o’ them Doomsday Machines.”
See what a luddite Pooh Bear is? A woke modern day commie would wish for a Death Star.
And Steyer is out too.
Rofl.
Steyer too? ROFL!
Fuck that guy.
I hope he wasted a couple of billion first. Same goes for Bloomturd.
Dang. How many billionaires will be left standing?
Bloomberg waved around his big — pile of cash, and Steyer realized he wasn’t up to it.
Somewhere there’s an unwritten rule that you have to be over 4 feet tall to be president.
?
I’m not seeing that.
Turned out to be not true.
Good. Let him spend millions more.
*steps into room*
Hmm.
*steps out of room*
“See what a luddite Pooh Bear is? A woke modern day commie would wish for a Death Star.”
Wisdom like this and you’re baling? Pussy.
“Come on in. The water is hot. And steaming.” https://youtu.be/fcPMDjkzeOo
From the midday links. Holy shit this a great forum! We go from diabetes rates in China and it spirals completely in control into dietary habits and pulls up from the ground at eye-ball level and later hits a three point landing. Only on Glibs! Nobody ranted, no one ran away to their bedroom and no one judged another’s comments (much). This site is a fucking Godsend.
“no one judged another’s comments (much)”
Wait… what site were you talking about?
Clearly Festus hasn’t met any of his comment nemeses yet. Give it time. Let him enjoy his innocence while he can.
Ah, say what you like! You guys can’t hurt my heart (much).
Am I really the only one to question Mo liking Miracle Whip? Is it glib approved?
*Starts packing bags*
Tell me that’s not true.
And I always liked Mo.
Miracle Whip? That’s worse than Jiff Peanut Butter
I also like Spin Blend.
Different ones for different purposes.
And today I learned about Spin Blend…it looks like a Miracle Whip knock off?
If it is, they have very different flavors. I can’t explain it. Also, there’s a childhood nostalgia thing going on with Spin Blend.
Had to Google that one. Looks like it’s unknown in Canada — and with a name like that, I can’t say that I’m sorry for its obscurity here.
It was better when transfats were still okie dokie.
Same with McDonald’s fries.
But… anal leakage??
I saw them open for the Red Hot Chili Peppers in ’89.
No, that’s olestra.
Was expecting this. You disappoint.
*hangs head in shame*
My cat judges me all the time. He just sits there and looks at me stone cold, and then has the gall to beg for pets.
Yeah. He’s a Glib.
We are all judging you!
I repel your judgment with the power of love *starts doing serpentine PG-rated dance*
“Some experts have speculated that such a disease could have originated from an incident when Genghis Khan had sex with a herd of yaks to win a bet”
LOL
Perfect, funny and for me that line didn’t trigger the “Oh, this must be satire” flag.
Biden is toast.
Not until he loses Sakalina.
I hear Yakust is hard to hold on to.
That would be really good for whichever midwesterner is going to take on Bernie
Old Joe is going to figure out just in time that he has to name a possible woke VP now to get the nomination. He won’t know what that means, so he’ll say it’s going to be Lizzie, which of course it was always going to be. Then he’ll be losing to Bernie and Bernie will get the it’s her turn treatment again and he’ll shut up and endorse Joe, who will lose to Trump. Dems will once again blame Russians, space aliens, whatever, and here we go again.
If it had been Trump vs. a (relatively) normal Democrat (not a Prog), I might have let my voter registration slide and done nothing. I didn’t vote for him last time and, while he has done some very positive things, he doesn’t move the needle much for me, in purely ideological terms.
That being said, I will vote Trump x1000 before I let a goddamn actual Communist became President.
I guarantee that there are millions of people out there who feel the same. Including some Democrats. We are watching a major party commit electoral suicide in real time. Unbelievable.
That being said, I will vote Trump x1000
VOTE FRAUD MUST BE ROOOOOOOSHIA!
Nah man, the DNC Manual of Style/Journolist mailer says its YOUUKRANNEE this week.
ROOOSHIA is not back in until after Valentine’s Day weekend. Silly.
I suspect you’re correct and this is like Labor in the UK – totally imploding. Something new will have to rise from the ashes.
They’ll be calling a huddle.
Have you been paying attention to what’s happening in Germany? Merkel’s hand picked butch dyke girlfriend successor has dropped out of politics because of the far right meanies winning influence. Frau Merkel is not looking happy these days.
“far right”
Why am I sure I’d look at their platform and find it 95% pedestrian? The other 5% would be full-on anti-semitism, because “Germany”, but still.
AfD does attract no-shit Nazis because “nationalist”, but yeah otherwise their platform is nothing shocking. Euro-skeptic, klimate-kaos-skeptic, etc. Oh, and pro-Israel, FWIW. I dunno what their economic stance is – could be awful for all I know – but Germany already as a strong “free market” party so there’s that.
“Why am I sure I’d look at their platform and find it 95% pedestrian?”
Because it’s what they do. Have you seen any of the articles about the VA gun rights debate going on where they always refer to the gun rights supporters as ‘gun extremists’?
That’s right, if you support the 2nd Amendment, you are now a ‘gun extremist’. If you don’t agree that socialism is just great, you’re a right wing extremist.
Buttigieg is leading or tied in delegates. hmm. we will see.
Sure hope you’re right.
Bernie is a commie lite compared to the upcoming crop of democrat woketards. I started saying it years ago, but the democrats went so far left so fast, and it didn’t start in the past couple years, it’s been going on for a decade or more, there is no way back. No way back. They’ll die on that hill or we become a socialist shithole within a couple of decades.
Both. They’ll be unelectable until the boomers die off and the gen xers are outnumbered by voters who never knew the Soviet union. Then we get the dystopia.
“the boomers die off and the gen xers are outnumbered by voters who never knew the Soviet union”
The worst part of being part of Gen X is that we’ll never actually end up in power for any significant amount of time.
Although, let’s be fair: plenty of Gen X members are also pro-commie.
40th anniversary of the Miracle on Ice coming up. CCCP getting ass-whipped will be everywhere.
Have faith.
Suck it, commies.
I was only 11 years old – and I either saw it live or misremember seeing it live – but it’s hard to overstate how huge that was at the time.
I was 12. And yes, it was huge.
I think for the older folks actually suffering the malaise it was more impactful.
I hope you have seen Miracle?
I was 17 or 18 at the time. That was something I’ll always remember.
Nah, I wasn’t much of a fan then.
Nah, I wasn’t much of a fan then.
Watch it. Kurt Russell was tremendous.
I was an 11 year old kid who dreamed of playing pro hockey. It was life-changing. It will never be replicated. The conditions will never be “just like that” again. Unbelievable. When I was at BU in the late 80s, every. single. time. Eruzione came into Walter Brown Arena it was announced and he got a five minute standing ovation. Including from the players on the ice or bench in some cases. It was THAT kind of cultural event.
Eruzione was/is a semi-common fixture at a bar where I misspent much of my 20’s (near BU – though this is now location #3 in the square).
I’ve got no beef with him riding that moment of glory for the rest of his life.
A lot of the guys are still around here. Lots of them are still involved with hockey, but they really don’t make a big deal about the Miracle.
I would absolutely buy Ruzzo a beer, though.
When were you there? I spent a lot of money and brain cells in Cornwall’s in Kenmore. BU ’91 (CLA, defected from ENG, like everyone else in the College of Lost Ambitions.)
Exactly, Tundra. I would, too. I like to think of it as a way of saying “thank you for the memories” – and most hockey guys, especially from that era, handle it “the right way.” Same is true of Bobby Orr, Mr. Howe, or Gretzky (as other examples of transcendent hockey figures who couldn’t buy a beer anywhere they ever went). Mr. Orr in my one interaction with him was as gracious as it is possible for a human being to be to fans. Now compare that to… other people who have achieved fame or notoriety and somewhere in there are a lot of important cultural lessons.
Ozy, you can’t compare hockey players with other celebs. First off, no one knows who the fuck they are IRL. Secondly, as a group they are the most gracious and humble pros out there. Lastly, hockey is the superior sport so who really gives a fuck about any of the rest?
Ahem.
When were you there?
Later than you, I think – started across the street in ’97, was serious regular for about a decade after that.
One of my happier memories: I bought an entire NROTC class a round right after 9-11. Money well spent.
(NU, ’93 – Huskies won the Beanpot the 3rd year in a row yesterday – w00t!)
Damn you make me feel old.
I read “40th anniversary of the Miracle on Ice coming up. CCCP getting ass-whipped” and think “Wut? Squaw Valley 1960 was more that 40 years ago.”
I have some hope, because people are living longer and having children is rapidly declining in all first world countries at the same time. There may be a chance that the kiddies will never outnumber us older and wiser at the voting booths.
President AOC will be the end of the Republic IMO.
Maybe not her but someone like her. Vapid and pure malicious will to power.
I hope so, but I fear that won’t be the case.
Titty Tuesday knows what you did last summer.
http://archive.li/UpQ4J
28 is into tentacle porn.
She dreams of the fisherman’s wife
Yikes. Still not sure I wouldn’t but the threat of violence is high.
I’d like to know more about 3.
Sanders 9
Butt guy 9
K 6
Is projection at this time.
Plus 9 Clint…I mean Unpledged.
Ummmm…. no.
https://www.salon.com/2020/02/08/americas-fatal-flaw-the-founders-assumed-our-leaders-would-have-some-basic-decency/
They assumed quite the opposite, hence the limited power and checks and balances. If they thought leaders would be fundamentally decent, then a monarchy would be fine.
It’s Salon, bro. They haven’t even figured out that water is wet yet, go easy on them.
What. A. Surprise.
https://www.manhattan-institute.org/charter-school-effectiveness-newark-new-jersey
Randi Weingarten says gimme more money.
I can’t remember if I heard this here or read an article somewhere else. Talking about the story of how Bernie became a commie because NY let the Brooklyn Dodgers move to L.A. when he was like 15 years old?
Heard that story back in 2015
I find it hilarious. I can just see young Bernie (in strong Brooklyn accent) They let the dodgahs move! Damn capitalists just movin the dodgahs out of Brooklyn! This would nevah happen in this Soviet Union, Communism must be the right way!
No one ever told poor young Bernie that the Soviet Union didn’t have world famous professional sports teams to move to other cities.
Well they did actually. They just had to defect first.
Mostly from satellite state Cuba, strangely.
I hear Michael Moynihan doing Bernie saying that.
I love that boozebag, even if I only agree with him half the time.
Fifth Column is super engaging, even if their politics is borderline Bernie apologist given how much they revile Trump. I blame that on Trump, though. He’s so jank and off-putting he can’t persuade people who hate socialism to side with him over socialists.
Welch sucks so bad (“to be sure”), but I love Kmele and Moynihan is so goddamn well-read and funny, even if I’m sure we have some fundamental disagreements.
Welch and Moynihan sure do close ranks when journalos catch some heat. Tribe uber alles.
Funny how the self-made man is the most libertarian (and successful).
Moynihan is why I stopped listening.
That would be unsurprising and just about the very most “Bernie” move ever.
Apparently, the event had a huge political influence on him. He’s a commie because the dodgahs left Brooklyn. Excusable for a 15 year old, at least for a week or so. But for an 80 year old guy still clinging to that bitterness? Sad. Now I know why Bernie is always so angry. When he becomes president, he’ll immediately do an executive order to move the Dodgahs back to Brooklyn.
Yep.
https://www.thenation.com/article/archive/what-losing-the-brooklyn-dodgers-taught-bernie-sanders/
and
https://www.si.com/mlb/2019/02/19/bernie-sanders-brooklyn-dodgers-move-los-angeles-1999-movie
NH primary results are incredible. Warren in 4th place and Biden in 5th. She’s dead. He’s in a coma. Unless Super Tuesday is a massive surprise it’s bye bye Joe.
The Dem establishment is screwed. If they screw Sanders they face an open revolt. If it’s Buttigieg they lose AA support.
Never thought I’d see the day the Dems might lose black support. And to Donald Trump of all people.
AA have the most to lose if socialism gains ground.
Yup. I’m starting to think an increasing percentage realize it.
If viral videos are any indication, then yeah.
It was true for Bill Clinton and it’s true now: it’s the economy, stupid.
Ding ding ding!
I’m curious to see what percentage he gets in the general election.
Has anyone ever won the presidency after losing both Iowa and NH?
I’m not sure Biden is finished. The establishment will resurrect his dead corpse, just like they did with Hillary.
Bill Clinton in 1992. Harkin won Iowa and Tsongas won NH.
Looking like 4 more years of orange bad man. Putin must be having a party right now.
*insert Nelson laugh* Fucking maroons. Dumb-fucks, fuck-sticks, sticks for brains! There are hovering vultures, waiting. This has been the plan from day one. The anointed one will rise!
“The anointed one will rise!”
Or be dragged in with one shoe off.
Yup, it’s all just a show to prepare the stage for herself. It’s becoming more transparent recently but I think she’s hoping on surprise to add some momentum to her campaign since she doesn’t have the energy to run a heavy campaign.
InfoWars, but a fella can dream can’t he?
https://www.infowars.com/could-new-hillary-e-mails-lead-to-criminal-charges/
I’ll be in my political bunk!
Surprise! https://youtu.be/eeZQ5VROfBE
The sad part is that Biden/Trump debates would be epic lulz.
Trump/Sanders will be so much fun. More fun than we deserve.
I want to watch the “Hair” vs “The Plugs” no holds barred.
Trump would get under his skin and Joe would fucking lose it, so yeah it would be epic.
“Listen, Fag…”
CNN is having big trouble concealing their dislike of Bernie. They are trying to figure out how Buttigieg can close the gap with Sanders. Bernie is the Dems Trump.
Fun fact about the New Hampshire primary: The only reason it is first in the nation is because New Hampshire used to have March elections until 1876 and still had town meetings in March so when they held their first primary in 1916 they held it at the same time as those meetings. It became first in 1920 because a bunch of states gave up on primaries leaving it first and no one really cared about the primaries until 1952 so it stayed that way.
As for Iowa the only it became big was because Jimmy Carter was able to spin his second place finish to unpledged delegates as a victory and gain momentum.
*Correction March elections until 1878
Hey Chip Wooder-
UD beat Rhode Island (is that even still a place?) 81-67
Suck
My
Ass.
*HM signal lit*
Its his lucky day….I just took a shower
What kind of fag washes their butt?
w00t!
I almost got stuck in traffic on my way home from the Y – got in the wrong lane and found myself in amongst the Flyer Faithful on their way to the arena right before game time. Glad the home team made it worth the trip.
For tonight’s losers. Cry in your beer to some fine two-step fiddle
https://youtu.be/DKnI2NGkaakhttps://youtu.be/DKnI2NGkaak
Holy shit. Blues/Ducks game postponed in the first period after Jay Bouwmeester collapses on the bench.
Scary as hell.
Fuck. It was the dad’s trip too. His old man was in the stands watching.
I read that he’s awake, though, so that’s good.
According to the news
Bouwmeester was reportedly alert and on his way to a local hospital soon after the incident, which seems like good news.
Let’s say you didn’t know any of the dem candidates. Would you have any problem matching them to their names?
Warren and Klobuchar might be a challenge.
Klobuchar looks exactly like my image of a Klobuchar. Clobber, glob and charred all mashed up.
*kissy fingers*
Was that your “screen name”, back in the day?
Saw a picture of Biden, Bernie, and Buttgulag. Wouldn’t be able to tell which was which if Bernie didn’t open his yap.
CBS news headline for a YouTube video
“President Trump’s proposed budget would slash social programs”
…and lots of framing, but the closest is he would cut almost $500B, but fails to mention how much he would spend on those same social programs and how much they spent last year. Wonder why? ~25% off EPA (which isn’t a social program) and a whopping 10% from HHS which includes CDC that is battling the coronavirus (and how much do they waste on non-public health threats? Most?). These journolists lack the self awareness to realize how fucking stupid they sound. This isn’t 1965 where they can just make assertions and expect people to swallow it whole.
Clickbait.
And yet, the biggest social programs of them all, Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid, Trump fellates in a daily blowbang on the lawn of the White House to a crowd of morbidly obese, electric cart-bound Boomers.
How are they gaining access to the WH lawn? I thought that was mostly for press, dignitaries, and whomever was being paraded around by our Masters.
Morbidly obese, electric cart-bound Boomers are the new dignitaries, you elitist scum!
Well, you don’t have to-
Hmm……
Perfect is the enemy of good. I’ll take any step in the right direction.
Can the president even cut funding to Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid? Or would that require an act of Congress?
The latter.
Borrowing from Peter to pay Paul to feed the most sacred of Boomer cattle (Trump is increasing the budgets of DHS, NASA, the VA, and keeping his hands off your Medicare), is a step sideways.
At this point, the Executive can do anything he pleases.
What, you still think this is a republic?
He’s been back stabbed on every attempt to with draw troops (whether or not that’s Kabuki I can’t say) but damn if he actually tried to take on entitlements we’d be at impeachment 4.0 before he’s even been there 4 years.
What makes you think he has any desire to? Let’s admit that for the vast majority of the current “Right” entitlement programs are widely popular. Just as long as the right people are entitled.
It’s a lamentable truth that the Tea Party rallies proved beyond a shadow of a doubt.
I think the reason is that most people believe/know that, if entitlements were cut, all the $ that got taken from them wouldn’t be going back to them, and they’d be s.o.l. for retirement.
Either that, or, they honestly believe in smaller government, so long as military, police, and government savings plans (::snicker::) are fully funded. Because, why worry about it yourself, when the government can do it?
Six of one and half a dozen of the other.
It will be fun after the collapse when we get to experience cannibalism.
HM: just wanting to be eaten.
Keep that live feed going–it’ll result in plenty of interest soon enough…
I’m not saying he does have any desire to do so. He just want’s wins. But even on things We agree with him on, the establishment has been very anti-that. So, even if he were pre-disposed, which I don’t think he is, he’s after all a 90s democrat, the GOP is to the left of him. That’s the fucking scary thing. The Rainbow Brigade drags on apace.
Had a flare up with my knees yesterday that had me worried it might carry over to starting my new job next week, but they felt better today. Some ‘arctic’ weather dropping down at the end of the week so I have a few chores that will test my knees, hopefully I won’t have a relapse.
Oh, and since I’m not getting a paycheck yet I’ve been metering out paying my bills a bit to make sure I make it through with the money have. I punched in the website to pay my internet bill (late but before they shut it off) to pay up. That’s when they shut me off. Oof. So I got charged an extra $3 for paying by phone. But it’s back up now.
Scrolling through the complete list of NH primary candidates wondering, “Who the hell are all these ‘<1%' people??" Just noticed that someone named Roque De La Fuente is listed under the Rs and someone named Roque De La Fuente III is listed under the Ds. Something something house divided.
Former lead singer for Rage Against The Machine. His career took a dive after he left.
Did Vermin Supreme win the L primary again? No wonder no one takes
usthem seriously.Zoltan Istvan
Fun fact – I went to high school with a kid named Zoltan Koos. He was just as awkward and socially disabled as you might imagine but in reality, a very sweet guy. He used to roam the halls like R. Crumb’s “Keep on trucking” guy. Wonder what ever happened to him? Probably got married and had little Zoltans…
“Mallet of Fire” kinda loses something in translation. Or does it?
Mallet of Fire was easily their best album. Fricking loved it.
Deval Patrick < 1%
Hilarious – former governor of a neighboring state gets sub-1%.
I know he announced his run but has he actually campaigned?
Huh…So, shitting on someone’s grave = a van up the wazoo. Or, something like that.
/at least the Joker is comprehensible
Well, Diggus, he does look like the sort that would bare cleft and drop a deuce on your shoe given half a mind.
“Bare cleft” is mine but you people are welcome to use it as you see fit.
Probably a a reader of modern Reason though, and not a Bernie Bro.
Oops, my might be one of my fans instead.
I….huh. Yeah; you may just be right!
Really, those quotes add almost nothing to the story, as they make no sense. Whether this is due to the guy rambling, or, the cop’s writing.
And it’s really 50/50 on that, lemme tell ya.
For sure.
what are they even redacting there, and why?
If they told you then it wouldn’t be redacted.
State secrets. Xenu comin’.
Well, that, or he has info that will lead to the arrest and indictment of Hilsdlk;jfahgoreuiyhpm;yibapjh os’lswjmn;bhoa//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
[The CIA’s plan to impeach Orange Man Bad]?
Where are Q’s nakey girls?
Taking the night off to canvas for Sanders?
Did anybody watch this CYE episode: https://hotair.com/headlines/archives/2020/02/sorry-trump-larry-david-give-f-maga-fans/ (not linking to TDB)
I was really confused as to what Larry David was trying to convey with that whole MAGA hat shtick. If he thought it made the OrangeManBad crowd look rational, he failed miserably. If he was 4D trolling…well, then–kudos.
Attention seeking, he’s a guy who made an entire career about making comedy from nebulous complaints. Sure, he hates Trump, but he’s the literally George Castanza. He’s who that character was based on.
The only joke is that Larry David, the character, is an arrogant misanthrope who consistently gets hoisted on his own petard.
People over-think comedy too often.
Oh, no argument here, HM–that is true in this episode, too. That said, the conceit of this episode was very political, and extended out to the entire country–not a me-vs.everyone, but a true us-vs-them schism. The joke didn’t quite work as it would appear he/they wanted it to.
*See the Crenshaw Pete comment for my take, if they approved it.
That scene is well done. I’ve seen a couple wildly conflicting interpretations of it and to me it just seems like the biker dude likes Trumpy Bear and can’t hold a grudge against a fellow Trumper. I read an unintentionally hilarious piece that tried to say that DJT didn’t understand that it was really saying that Trump supporters were inherently violent.
Someone linked to Trumps tweet in the AM links and I didn’t get it then and I don’t get it now.
I don’t either. Forget it Joe it’s
China TownCurrent Year.I didn’t see his twatter, so I have no idea what OMB said. My issue, if any, is how the episode doesn’t really say what the leftists want it to say. Not the way it plays out.
HM is right about the overthinking comedy thing. I just find it funny how strident the anti-Trumpers in the scene are, as opposed the “violent” biker, that had every reason to be fighting mad at the LD character, but softened when he saw the MAGA.
It seemed like it was either that the biker liked the Trump support, was scared of the Trump support, or just surprised by the audacity of the Trump support. I liked the ambivalence of it.
You know, the more I think about it, you’re right. There was some subtleness/ambivalence to it.
Here is what Trump Tweeted. I know nothing else. I’ve never watched the show. But yeah, from that clip it looks like even angry people can have polite convos if they just love Trumpy Bear.
I’ve also never really watched the show, just seen a clip here or there. Here is a funny article on it that posits that Trump is so stupid he doesn’t know it is making fun of him.
https://www.sfgate.com/tv/article/Trump-tweet-Curb-Your-Enthusiasm-larry-david-15047769.php
I’ve seen all seasons but haven’t started on this one. Larry hasn’t done politics on the show other than as a vehicle for the joke. We know his politics but he isn’t using the show to make a political point. He is always going for the laugh. I’d guess this is more of the same.
Well, the link in the article suggests that conservatives (in general), and pro-Trumpers (especially) are not wanted or needed by Larry. But, you are right about him not really using politics–well, an Us v Them style–for anything other than jokes.
I get the, “If you don’t like my stuff, feel free to go away” attitude. but, I usually see it in a ‘no animosity intended’ frame. He seems happy if those kinds of people aren’t part of the audience.
Boy, that Matthew fella needs both a brain AND a heart.
All I know is Larry David does a killer Bernie Sanders, and will get an Oscar when he plays Sanders in the forthcoming vilification of how Sanders got Trump elected twice, (((they))) always blame the Jews.
Late Nite Remembrances – I was at a party at a friend’s house and this girl and I met and were really getting along. Like famously. After we really started to get to know each other we got to the point wherein we started talking about our last names. Turns out she was from my Mom’s tiny home town and shared the same oddly spelled last name. I almost became a two thousand mile away cousin-fucker.
Does it count in another zip code/postal code? Asking for a friend…
It was funny because when we shared the surnames, we knew. We just knew. She was pretty damn hot but as soon as truth was apparent it was nopenopenopenope!
What are we talking here second cousin? third, fourth, fifth? Surely there is a point where bumping uglies becomes acceptable.
When she doesn’t look like your grandma?
Good rule.
CPRM is on fire tonight!
Not saying anyone should pee on him, or, anything like that.
That is why I need more Patreon support, so I can drop this knowledge on late nighters because I’m drunk. The
AmericanWisconsin Dream.Drink Wisconsinably.
That was the sweet coozie that I found the other day. It’s now in the collection.
Probably second. Close enough to matter. I think we both realized at the same time, hence the bolt of lightning.
Yikes. That’s too close for comfort. But you could give her CPRM’s phone number.
She’ll be a Grandma by now. My war stories are old because I am old.
It was like a bolt of fucking lightning. We used to run into one another from time to time and it could have been awkward but I’d just pipe up “How’s it goin’, Cuz?” She stopped liking me after that.
You could be living that Porn Hub dream with them web-footed kids, Olympic grade swimmers.
If I could give a “joke, cubed” award, I would.
All the inhabitants of the town had that eerie “MacLaren” look…
Like…the car?
No. The inbred Scots.
Meh, I got cousin fuckers in my family tree, 2 out of the 5 offspring turned out not completely dumb. Maybe not great odds when put like that.
She would have been many-removed from my gene pool but it was enough. We even looked alike.
Thus the attraction? Classic Narcisism, just like Trump, which I say as a
licensed and legalInternet Psychologist. So now you must be put in a mental institute.Hold on–is this the case that will, once and for all, prove Genetic Sexual Attraction??
/co-morbidity for the win!
Well, I DID used to practice self-love once or twice or thrice a day when I was a young feller…
A very similar thing happened to a buddy of mine. Unfortunately it was the morning after, at her place, in bed…
Olivia Jade: highly talented coxswain
Fuckin’ lame unless Agent Van Der Beek was in charge.
It does seem like something out of a bad Ke$ha video. The FBI getting involved is hilarious and sad.
I saw that yesterday. I’m a little surprised the kid wasn’t charged. She appears to be in on it. That’s not true of all the students. Her lies appear particularly egregious.
I was under the impression they (parents) had it made up for her, as she was busy ‘influencing’ people. There has been a LOT of talk online about parents doing the actual application process for their kids–especially in higher-income homes, due the kids not giving a shit and/or being so clueless that they have to have someone do it for them.
I don’t know the specifics of how active Aunt Becky’s kid was in the process. I did read she posed for a photo on a rowing machine for her application. I suspect she knew what was going on.
Some reports of other kids have the parents including things after the kids’ involvement ended. There are also reports of parents paying for test scores without their kid’s knowledge.
As you say, there are also reports of kids who were completely disengaged so they did as they were told without realizing what was happening.
Ah! Well, then–yes, she probably was in on it. Part of me though (the tingly part…) still thinks the girl was probably not aware that, “you DON’T do things like that in the real world”. OK…some people do.
Anyway, welcome to the party, Princess.
Even in my mid-30s I’m just now coming around to the fact that the advice that my extant parent gives me isn’t always the best.
HM is here to guide you m
I still don’t know why anyone was charged, we’re throwing people in jail for lying and bribing to get into colleges?
They get Gov $? There ya go.
Otherwise, yeah, I don’t give a shit.
Were these people defrauding government student loans? I was under the impression it was just to get accepted and assumed since they were bribing people they had the tuition covered.
I also believed that was the case. They are paying tuition and not getting a loan. It’s not like they were defrauding some grants or scholarships. Which makes it utterly ridiculous that the Feds are getting involved, but par for the shitty course,
I never read or heard anything about scholarships, but these cases did focus on bogus claims of athletic achievements, which does usually involve scholarships, but that hasn’t been focused on in any of the MSM coverage.
Yep, the schools should expel/revoke acceptance from the kids and fire anyone on their end that was taking bribes. Outside of that I can’t see why there are criminal charges for anyone involved.
It’s a fraud on the schools.
Even if these are private unis, once GovMon enters the picture, even if none went to the perpetrators, Uncle Sam gonna get his pound of flesh.
Plus, you just gotta know there are plenty of people cheering this on: Either to sstick it to the Rrichie Riches, or, because UNFAIR!!1!.
Or, both.
Or they are pissed because their otherwise qualified kid didn’t get into the school. Ask me how I know.
Given your experience, do you want to see this situation go the criminal route*?
*it already is, but, I’m interested in how you would handle it
Is that a statement of your moral disagreement or a question how it’s legally possible?
Both? but mostly the former, I get that anything can be illegal so Its more why than how.
Fraud on the school. It’s deliberately misrepresenting the qualifications of an applicant so the applicant gains an advantage by making the misrepresentation.
I’m gonna presume Hyp’s argument and say that this should, at most, be a civil issue, and not criminal.
“What are you in for?”
“I paid some people a bunch of money to ensure my kid got into a top-notch university. You?”
“I, uh…just rape.”
What makes lying to a school so special, If I lie to Home Depot and slip the hiring dude an Outback Steakhouse gift card to get that sweet sweet gig in the plumbing department, am I going to jail? Should I?
“But not ‘rape-rape. I had 4 beers and she only had 3.” The world we live in.
You absolutely committed fraud. Yes it’s a crime. The appropriate punishment is another matter.
IANAL but I would think that for fraud to be criminal one would have to take something from somebody. In my silly ‘what if’ I’m not taking anything from HD as long as I’m actually doing the job. In the school admission case they aren’t taking anything if they still pay the tuition. As you mention above they may have ‘taken’ a spot someone else might have gotten but that spot wasn’t that other persons in the first place. The college wasn’t defrauded (they got paid) and the other kids aren’t defrauded (you can’t lose what you don’t have)
It’s ridiculous. People have been doing this for centuries and making an example of a few B-listers ain’t gonna change anything. Heck, when I was in school you knew who was going to Uni and who would be fixing their broken shit.
She’s damn near as old as me but she still has a great ass.
Phone. Number.To.CPRM.
And I’ll take an ass photo.
You’re probably gonna have to either do the double mirror thing, or, do some kind of timer on your phone.
I, uh, just mean, uh….good luck with the picture!
WTF are you talking about Willis?
He’s questioning your reach around ability.
Hyp gets it.
/Grow longer arms, Chafed. Or, hire help
Yeah, I’m sure I could get a lady Festus’ age if that were my thing. My 80 yr old Aunt’s friends all think I’m ‘The Bee’s Knees’
Festus is 55. He only looks 80.
IOW, he skews older.
Hi-yo!!
If I was gonna over-reach by over 20yrs, I grasp that brass ring of sweet-SS.
You’re not far off with that reach. I might do a few weeks and just throw in the towel. All of my work is core centered and my core has been ass-fucked. If I can’t do a decent job then I’m not doing it at all. My clients deserve better and so does my reputation.
Oh, man….Well, maybe we can get you a phone survey gig, or, something similar. I hear telemarketing is poised to really take off in about….oh, 20 years or so.
I was thinking more like “Cranky Wal-Mart Greeter”. Hey, where you going with the cart, Fat? You want a piece of me? I used to whip together a dog and pony show like nobody’s business. We had everything, horse-face! No fucking malarkey!
I kinda read that in an Aussie brogue…
*narrators voice* In 2009 Wal-Mart wouldn’t hire him..
I’ll just drop this here.
Are you dropping-and-running, young lady??
It’s not as
funrude as stop-and-frisk, but, decorum.Good thought but she could use an editor.
I noticed that too.
G’night Diggy and Chaff-ed.
Night, Man.
Sweet Social Security dreams.
The new album from a geriatric metal band?
Nah. CPRM’s as short cut to riches.
*just having fun with the phrase 😉
Yeah I’m done for tonight. Only one too many near cousin-fuck story but you kids will have to wait until next time. You know that there are more.
I do? There are??
Actually I’m running low on Festus tales. Could tell the one where I got ambushed and watched my kittens lap up my blood…
Eh, well…..I’ll just be over there, sifting through the magazines.
Sorry, Pal. Lotsa Heavy Metal and National Lampoon. The Juggs collection is under the bed where nobody will ever find it.
Well, then, how do you expect me to peruse them??
You are a small and adventurous boy. They will find you, eventually.
“Small”? Maybe we need to go over a certain concept
Anyone who is still active here: Do you agree with the idea that Trump is a “bully”? If so, can you explain how he fits your definition of the title?
And, just to keep things moving along, I’m going to put up his abuse of Eminent Domain. I’m talking about things other than using courts to let business take property away from its current owner.
That’s one huge reason I didn’t vote for him. He was all for Kelo all the way.
I also don’t like that he stiffed independent contractors and small businesses every time he went bankrupt. Is that bullying?
The stiffing (ahem) I wouldn’t call ‘bullying’, so much as him being a shit-heel. The Kelo thing, I do, BUT…is he currently doing so as Prez? From what I can see, people are calling him a bully for simply talking mean about people. Maybe further shit-heelery, but, not a bully. I care not that he is doing so in his elected capacity, as long as he’s not using government force against these people he’s bad-mouthing.
Decorum is nice and all, but, doesn’t move me much, as I expect the worst from politicians, and I admit that I like when shitty people are called shitty–even if it’s blind squirrel/nut, or, the whole ‘enemy of my enemy’.
Better this than that last smarmy cunte that held office.
So far, I think that’s true.
As far as I can see, he’s not a bully, per se. I would liken it to a playground bully trying to bully a boy his size but who is also the class clown.
So the bully tries it and the class clown not only doesn’t get intimidated, he starts ridiculing the bully. He makes it safe for everyone else to ridicule the bully also.
I, too, am tired of decorum. Mitt Romney embarrassed the hell out of me, he was such a beta.
I suppose there are a lot of people out in the nation who want their ass kissed a bit by people who take their money. I can understand it on the ‘human nature’ level, but, I hate false dichotomies.
Fuck Mitt Romney and his holier than thou jet-ski hair-do. He’s a fucking copperhead.
Ol’ ‘Catchers’ Mitt.
Yeah, I went there.
He’s a blowhard. A loud-mouthed schnook! He’s an ass-hole but he farts in the right general direction.
I have to admit that I like the asshole aspect that comes from (what I think is) his sense that many people were tired of one group or another dumping on them, and he decided that he get their loyalty if he shat on those groups. I see it as disabusing people of the notion that ‘likability’ is needed to win. Not that those people are learning the lesson that I would hope Americans learn (stop handing power over your life to others who don’t even know you).
THIS! Every time I need to deal with a functionary feels like another hundred years added to limbo. I’ve been in jail. I’ve been committed. Getting a driver’s licence shouldn’t involve a cavity search. Hell, my Judi shouldn’t even be employed. She’s a screener at the airport and has been for nearly 15 years. You know how many guns, knives and explosives that they’ve found in that time? None. Zero. She makes 24 bucks an hour so what the fuck…
Daaaaaaang! $8.75/hour USD! ::whistles::
I keed, and I feel your pain–just like WJC.
You laugh now but what happens when she’s supporting me? I wasn’t kidding earlier. We are well and truly fucked and that ain’t a joke.
Sorry, guys. I’ve been feeling not quite myself for the last few hours. Things will either turn great or go to shite. Never mind, and Diggus, I love you, Man.
Well, I love you too, mate. Enjoy some ethnic humour
I don’t get it.
#meneither
I think he’s riffing on that nonsensical ‘shape of our democracy’ quote of Pete’s by having him say something equally nonsensical and he threw in some ‘niggas’ to be edgy. IOW I don’t get it either.