Sure, but you can sing along to the chorus as if Weird Al had redone it “why’d you go get so constipated?”.
Trigger Hippie
on February 26, 2020 at 7:28 pm
Until Al creates the tune, all I’ll hear is Avril. Curse you for that.
She was cute, I’ll give her that. In a dull eyed, stoner wannabe punk who melted into your couch one night at a party and somehow never left kinda way.
juris imprudent
on February 26, 2020 at 7:26 pm
And I raise you, and yes I did see them perform this live just not this show.
Trigger Hippie
on February 26, 2020 at 7:34 pm
I can see the appeal in that. Theatrical, funny, enough musical and singing talent to not make it painful to listen to, and most importantly not taking itself seriously.
I found Pop Punk in the late nineties and early aughts borderline offensive.
I heard that tune driving into Portland today. When I was a kid, I’d get a lttle boner every time Dionne was on TV. Carol Burnett Show, Love Boat, whatever. 7 year old egould knew exactly what was up.
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 8:07 pm
driving into Portland
I’m sorry.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 8:20 pm
It was Gopher, wasn’t it.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:22 pm
All Bernie Kopell, all the time.
It’s nice how it was totally OK that the ship’s doctor spent all his time pursuing and banging the bejesus out of the female passengers.
I was indifferent to Knight Rider but the other two were definitely staples in my house growing up.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 8:30 pm
Kitt’s voice was lame. If it was a K car, maybe it would have fit.
The Last American Hero
on February 26, 2020 at 8:58 pm
But Bonnie was rockin’ and it was another show where the incompetent government couldn’t get shit done or was actively on the take from the bad guys and a private actor had to come in and save the day.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 10:21 pm
Unlike an attraction to butts or breasts, which is almost always sexual, foot appreciation is connected to a deeper fascination with what feet can reveal about the women who pound the pavement with them. According to foot “appreciators,” feet are indicative of how much care a person puts into their health and appearance, their overall bone structure and if they’re carefree enough to wear sandals or go barefoot. “Society is readily okay for people to be attracted to bums and boobs in public, which often provoke arousal, but looking at feet is frowned upon,” says Pinchy69, a 44-year-old wikiFeet user. “Many of us in the foot community couldn’t care less about getting turned on. In fact, we’re put right off by the idea.” (Of course, not every user agrees with that assessment: “I’d say it’s pretty much a sexual thing for me,” says Mishu777, a 30-year-old on the East Coast who preferred to not disclose their gender.)
So why would Pinchy69 upload more than 35,000 images of feet since joining wikiFeet in 2014 if it wasn’t a sex thing? The answer seems to circle back to Ettienne and Ozer’s previous word choice — it’s not about sex, it’s about “community.” That is, there’s a level of pride and camaraderie built around the hunt for quality, publicly available photos, but also a comfort in finding like-minded people.
Community.
egould310
on February 26, 2020 at 7:50 pm
Just trying to spread a “community” of jizz on those feet. Like random Drunken asshole says, “show me dem toesies.”
Good, relatively speaking. Pneumonia (acute thing) and an appointment with a pulmonologist tomorrow to find out what the chronic things are going on inside his lungs. They specifically said nothing looked cancerous, so that’s off the table.
He’s got high-powered antibiotics and with any luck, he’ll be able to get a full five days off work with short-term disability.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 8:13 pm
Don’t wanna say that I’m glad to hear that, but I guess that is a good thing all things considered.
The apparent high-wire act between advocate of reform and of empire-building was captured by Vogue when it caught up with Buttigieg for a cover profile at his tasteful South Bend white Victorian. The interviewer was struck by “a huge mineral and resource map of Afghanistan” in his living room. No hint was provided as to whether Buttigieg was for or against realpolitik based on perceived US national or corporate interests.
Holy fudge.
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 7:54 pm
None of you will read the story anyway so why bother with a good link! WHY BOTHER?
Heroic Mulatto
on February 26, 2020 at 7:56 pm
I read it.
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 8:00 pm
Whatever, Pinnocnegro.
Jarflax
on February 26, 2020 at 8:02 pm
So when he lies what precisely grows?
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:07 pm
/Glen was played by the Agent Smith-type guy in the first Deadpool. Yeah, him.
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 8:03 pm
Ethan Hunt > James Bond > Bryan Mills > Jason Bourne
Tundra
on February 26, 2020 at 8:06 pm
Did you hit your head recently?
James Bond>Mitch Rapp>Jason Bourne>Bryan Mills>Ethan Hunt
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 8:09 pm
My goodness this is the most wrong you have ever been wrong.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:15 pm
Damn shame the screwed up the initial attempt at a Mitch Rapp movie. I enjoyed those books quite a bit, prior to Vince Flynn passing. I think I made it 4 chapters into the first Rapp book by the new author, Kyle Mills – oy.
It’s like Mills had never even read a Rapp book. Zero nuance, Rapp is just an unstoppable killing machine.
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 8:21 pm
He played lax!
Tundra
on February 26, 2020 at 8:22 pm
So, Vince was a local dude.
My sister worked for a literary agent to whom he submitted his first book, Term Limits. The agent rejected it but Vince was a beast and decided to self-publish. My sis helped with editing and got credits in the first book and a character in another. We got to know him quite well, so I was always a big fan. It was weird when he got famous.
I highly recommend his books. I’ve read the Mills ones and, while not nearly as good, I just want the character to keep going. Like Mack Bolan.
Later, I go eat at a bigga resturant
The waitress bring me a spoon and a knife, but no fuk!
I tell her i wanna the fuk
She tell me everyone wanna fuck
I tell her you don’t understand
I wanna you fuk on the table
She say you better not fuck on the table
You son of a beech!
So I go back to my room in a hotel
And there is no sheeats on the bed
Call the manager and I’m tellin him i wanna sheeat!
He tellin me go to the toilet
I say No! You no understanda me I wanna a shit on my bed!
He say you better not shit on my bed
You son of a beetch!
I go to the check out and the man in the desk says
Peace on you, i said piss on you too you son oF a beetch!
I go back to Italia, Arrivederci!
Didn’t one of those chicks burn down Andre Rison’s house?
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:37 pm
Yep, Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes (RIP).
… in 1994, when she was arrested for setting fire to Andre Rison’s sneakers in a bathtub, which ultimately spread to the mansion they shared and destroyed it. She claimed that Rison had beaten her after a night out, and she set fire to his shoes to get back at him but that burning down the house was an accident.
I just recently learned that Ray Parker Jr was one hell of a songwriter and musician before the Ghostbustin’ thing. He wrote and played the nasty guitar on Rufus’s You’ve got the Love por ejemplo.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 10:39 pm
Yeah, but I do like some mild carmelization for most dishes, can’t really think where you wouldn’t want just a little browning. I guess it depends a bit on how you’re cutting and cooking as well, but onions tend not to burn on me.
That was my take, he isn’t really ‘frying’ the garlic and peppers, he’s heating the oil and infusing it, so very low temp. Notice he hardly fucks with it and yet there is almost no color to the garlic.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 8:54 pm
Only way to be sure is to taste it, but I don’t think you could get the oil infused with much of the flavor that quickly, especially at a low temp.
Sean
on February 26, 2020 at 8:12 pm
Oddly, I’ve accepted I might get the coronavirus, but I don’t care. I doubt it will affect me more than a cold. /Healthy AF.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:34 pm
Hell, I was near death with Influenza A in the hospital a couple of years ago. They forgot to check for pneumonia (turns out that is why I couldn’t breathe).
Antibiotics and steroids put my right as rain quickly, once I had grabbed the doctor by the sleeve and told her I did not want to die this way and that something was very very wrong, thus prompting the X-ray and lung culture that showed the pneumonia that was about to kill me.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:37 pm
I honestly don’t think Coronavirus is that scary.
Global cooling. Acid rain. Y2K. Dot com bubble. Global warming. Swine flue. War on Christmas. #metoo. West Nile Virus. Ebola. Refugee crisis. Autonomous hand guns.
And yet we are still here.
Jarflax
on February 26, 2020 at 8:39 pm
I am with you on this. I have a suspicion that the high mortality rate is actually due to the fact that only the very sick are seeking medical care and being tracked. I suspect the number of cases in china is actually much higher than reported and that the death rate is actually well under 1%.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:44 pm
The widespread smoking in China can’t be helping with the pneumonia.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 8:52 pm
Based on what people say about the smog there…
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 8:58 pm
I’m hope too that the denominator is underreported due to asymptomatic and mild cases. The bigger problem than just the mortality rate is the number that require hospital level care, which could overload medical care to the point of triaging patients, both Covid-19 infected and the regular caseload.
The best case scenario now is slow the spread and reduce the number of people infected at one time. Personal hygiene (washing hands, not touching hands to face, covering cough, staying home if sick or symptomatic) can help a lot with that.
pistoffnick
on February 26, 2020 at 8:40 pm
You forgot Net Neutrality.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:42 pm
That’s right! We are dead from net neutrality and Cotizens United!
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:02 pm
The disease itself isn’t so scary. The proactive measures and the resulting economic impact is another story. We’re already feeling that here.
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 9:27 pm
Yeah, I think it’s going to get worse. Reducing the number of possible person to person contacts will reduce the rate of spread and likelihood of a Wuhan (or at this point, Iran is probably a better example) overload. I’d give it 50/50 that the Olympics are canceled. Lots of unknowns at this point.
Travel is going to get hammered hard.
grrizzly
on February 26, 2020 at 8:45 pm
I’m not even sure there’s such a thing as a flu. In the last 20 years my temperature never exceeded 38C (=100.4F). Make it 30+ years, if I ignore one instance of food poisoning.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:49 pm
It’s a real thing alright. When you go to your regular doctor because you “don’t feel so good” and she calls an ambulance to take you to the ER from the clinic because she can see your skin sinking into your collar bone and neck muscles as you breathe, you know there is flu.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:56 pm
She even called the ER ahead of time so they’d be ready for me!
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 8:56 pm
I got the flu last week, I went to work because I just felt a little tired. Eventually I went home and sat around for a day and was better the next.
I only know I got the flu because my son caught it after me and he got sick enough that we tested him.
Corona is probably for wusses.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:59 pm
It suxx if you are immunocompromised to begin with. I take some stuff that suppresses my immune system due to autoimmune diseases (very funny, body. Nice work killing yourself).
So I was vulnerable and it handed my ass to me. Also with epilepsy, fever is a big seizure trigger, so I do my best to avoid exposure.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:24 pm
Pretty much.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:30 pm
Just no.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 8:27 pm
It must be just what they all needs…
He just be pumpin’ every one of ’em up with all the bag
fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:29 pm
I… what?
Crusty Juggler
on February 26, 2020 at 8:31 pm
He means sausagey semen.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:00 pm
If you weren’t a double secret satan you’d know all about this.
The song is based on real life events.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 9:27 pm
Ah, old people musical reference. Gotcha.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 8:36 pm
“straffin san. Konnichiwa. Could you come into our office today and give your presentation to Asuka-san? She was home sick when you gave us your presentation.”
I gave that presentation to 20 people and they think I’m gonna take 3 hours out of my day off to give it one on one to some dolt who missed it. Told them I’d do it again for 200 bucks. “Uh, well, we will pay for your lunch and transportation.” People are assholes.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 8:38 pm
Unless she’s the capo di tutti i capi, “no”. Here’s are the slides.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:39 pm
Phone it in. Can’t bottle the lightning.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 8:44 pm
I did offer to skype it. 100 bucks for that. They balked.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 8:54 pm
Geez. Penny wise and yen foolish.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:03 pm
In what world do you do stuff for free?
Also 100 bucks is like nothing. Just say’n.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:08 pm
It’s all about greasing the wheel for me. I tend to do all the little extra things for my clients so that they always come back to me. Sometimes it means doing stuff like this. *shrugs* Maybe I’m not doing it the best way, but I’m constantly getting calls from people asking me to work for them. Word of mouth references are huuuuge here.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:12 pm
Yeah, I get that it all depends on what else you might be able to monetize thanks to that, it just seems funny for them to complain about paying that small a fee (assuming it is a bigger business, which I suppose it is if there are even 20 people to talk to).
Of course, if shes the trigger puller, I would have just said yes myself. 😛
I’m constantly getting calls from people asking me to work for them. Word of mouth references are huuuuge here.
Time to start raising your prices.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:18 pm
Maybe. I average 50/hour. Other people doing what I do make more, but I get more work. Been doing this hodge podge style of work for 20 years and I’ve settled into how I do it.
/Stubborn old man
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:21 pm
Sorry if I sound flippant, obviously you know a lot more about what you’re doing and the market you’re in.
I could never be a business owner, I have the wrong temperament for it I think.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:23 pm
Not flippant at all. “Time to start raising your prices” is the question that has befuddled me for years.
RAHeinlein
on February 26, 2020 at 9:28 pm
Billing larger businesses for small fees is onerous and often difficult for budget-holders.
egould310
on February 26, 2020 at 11:14 pm
@Straff, when was the last time you raised your prices?
I often deal with businesses that notify their customers that they will be raising prices.
The lead time of the raise is at least 3 months. Usually they reach out to customers during the “slow period”. This gives the customer a chance to negotiate terms, and budget For the new pricing
Some customers might balk, others will sign on. It’s all a negotiation.
Find out which clients really value your service.
Give yourself a raise.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 10:46 pm
100 smackers…geeze, that’s a lot of hair cuts in your area!
Hey, is there any interest in scheduling a Glibs virtual meetup by Telecon? I’ve floated the idea before, but now I wanted to put it out there in “prime time” to gauge interest. I’d handle the logistics of the dial in number if so.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:05 pm
One logistics issue, how will HM send us weird links to look at?
Heroic Mulatto
on February 26, 2020 at 9:23 pm
I will strip on cam.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:26 pm
I’m in.
Pope Jimbo
on February 26, 2020 at 10:03 pm
Only if you pick some decent music to strip to.
If you try twerking to that Tuva bullshit you linked to below, I don’t care if I can bounce a quarter off your ass!
Tundra
on February 26, 2020 at 9:06 pm
I already have your numbers. Why would we involve the freaks?
Charles Easterly
on February 26, 2020 at 9:59 pm
“I already have your numbers.”
Clearly I am putting aside my typical demeanor upon these unhallowed threads (in which one or two commentators described me as gentlemanly)…
Tundra, are the numbers you have in mind the ones mentioned several times in this song from a heavy metal band?
Uffda, you could at least check around for a second to see if I’m around. Words hurt!
On a serious note, I think that the Minnesoda Crewe should find a place to meet up locally for this dial in. Sure it would be awkward being the only ones wearing pants, I’m sure it would still be fun.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:09 pm
Waist up only?
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:20 pm
I’m assuming no video. Sorry, everybody.
Charles Easterly
on February 26, 2020 at 9:47 pm
“I’m assuming no video. Sorry, everybody.”
Perhaps you can “attend” whilst disabling/covering your video apparatus, Rhywun
Pope Jimbo
on February 26, 2020 at 10:09 pm
What about the Aussie Glibs? Are you really suggesting that they have to stand on their heads just to comply with your prudish demands?
I just figured you were going to show up half pixelated.
I’ve constructively criticized CPRM’s animation before, so I want to say the squinting Trump was done masterfully, the left eye in particular, subtle but enough that I was just starting to think ‘what’s with his eye?’ right before The Hair starts questioning Trump’s health. Great Job CPRM.
Lackadaisical
on February 26, 2020 at 9:15 pm
Yeah, I think the quality has been improved lately. Kudos CPRM.
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:21 pm
Yep, I noticed that left eye too. Almost subconsciously.
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 9:13 pm
With these railroad blockades it is increasingly clear that much of Canada’s elite thinks of Canada as a Genocidal Settler State. And no that is not an exaggeration. How does that fit in with post-nationalism? The Nation State is bad but the state isn’t
And this will come to the US eventually. They are already moving from the Confederates to the Founding Fathers for owning slaves and then to Lincoln and co. for creating a genocidal settler state. I mean who lived in those territories the Republicans didn’t want slaveowners to live in?
You’re thinking too hard about it; everything they do is to accumulate and retain power. They don’t have logic, principles or reason, trying to make sense of it is pointless. The only thing they care about is raw power; the boot stomping on a face forever. They treat the Nation as illegitimate because it serves a purpose in service to their quest for power. Weaken the foundations of national identity and turn people against each other and cracks open in society that can be exploited. They don’t call it a demoralization campaign for nothing.
If it became convenient once again to embrace nationalism in their quest, they’d do that. Just accept it Winston: people, by and large, *want* to be slaves. All your rhetorical questions amount to nothing because the general ideology of liberty most of us on this site share is not respected or desired by the mass of humanity.
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 9:33 pm
Just accept it Winston
It’s not easy…
If it became convenient once again to embrace nationalism in their quest, they’d do that
Well they already are. Going after the Confederates is nationalism. So is what is the Liberals are doing. We have certain values as Canadians and America, at least when Republicans are in charge, sucks.
I ended up jinxing my sleep schedule. I ended up zonking out shortly after I was done with the remote work this afternoon and just woke up. So I’ll be off-schedule for the rest of the week at least.
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:22 pm
Reread one of your own books? Kidding, but not really. Reading my own stuff puts me out quick.
Soul patches, handlebar mustaches, and a Zorro-style mustache are OK so not all facial hair needs to go.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 9:37 pm
I was under the impression that masks did nothing to prevent contracting the virus, just (possibly) helped limit the spread of it.
creech
on February 26, 2020 at 9:41 pm
Monday my doctor said the mask was useful in preventing you from touching your own mouth and introducing virus from your hands.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 9:45 pm
That, I’d believe – I have a terrible habit of touching my face. I’m really trying to get myself to stop it. I catch myself on videoconferences at work – it’s a bad look.
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:47 pm
I have a terrible habit of touching my face
#metoo
Pope Jimbo
on February 26, 2020 at 9:52 pm
A couple weeks ago I saw some medical type get interviewed who said masks weren’t all that effective. He said that wearing a pair of cotton gloves was much better.
According to this guy most transmission is from touching something that has the virus and then touching your eyes, nose or mouth. He said gloves wouldn’t pick up as many viruses and they also made you much more aware of trying to touch your face.
Don’t know how accurate that is, but at least you don’t look like a dork with a mask
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:55 pm
The biggest problem with the mask is how people take it off after wearing one all day. The fucking thing captures are that crud all day on the outside of the mask and then people grab the front and pull it off, getting all those contaminants on their hands. It’s like licking your water filter after using it.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 10:58 pm
Pai Mei would just punch the fucking virus in it’s head and be done with it.
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:40 pm
Say no to beard-os.
Tres Cool
on February 26, 2020 at 10:02 pm
I was at a viewing tonight for an older cousin’s husband that passed. Small town, so a lot of his grandson’s (20-somethings) were there, too.
I was amazed at the beards, and fitted baseball hats. The latter worn indoors, in a funeral parlor.
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 10:07 pm
The latter worn indoors, in a funeral parlor.
Ugh.
I went to a viewing recently for my friend’s girlfriend. His side were all shirt, tie, etc. Her family were mostly dressed like slobs. It was not something anyone talked about or anything, just… weird.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 10:09 pm
At the last “formal” work event, I was admiring what must have been some fellow’s dress-hoodies.
Pope Jimbo
on February 26, 2020 at 10:22 pm
My dad has had a goatee since the ’60s. He took a ton of shit about it when he moved up to rural NW Minnesoda in the early ’70s. He didn’t complain, just kept the beard.
What killed him was when the hipsters all started wearing goatees too in the ’90s. All of a sudden he looked like some sad old poseur. He said he got way worse ribbing about being a hipster wannabee than he ever did when he was a borderline hippie.
What I want to know is what the dead guy would have thought.
DEG
on February 26, 2020 at 10:16 pm
Sorry.
Tres Cool
on February 26, 2020 at 9:42 pm
Somehow we’ve managed through the swine flu, avian flu, SARS, and a batch of CDC-verified™ flu vaccines that didnt do shit for the past decade.
Why, in a planet of nearly 8 BN people, are were concerned if even 0.5 mil croak?
Not to sound callous, and its been posted here already- but more people die annually from the off-the-shelf, standard-issue, influenza, than this has caused.
For pants-shitting outbreak, see also: Zika Virus
Rhywun
on February 26, 2020 at 9:46 pm
I guess the thinking is that people think this one is more deadly than the flu – though it’s not proven yet.
Tres Cool
on February 26, 2020 at 9:51 pm
Flu always takes out the young and the old; newborns and infirm. Despite being someone that got a$shed today, its natural selection.
I doubt you’re gonna read that “star Olympic athlete Xing Yang Putz died today from COVID-19 infection”
“It is believed that cytokine storms were responsible for the disproportionate number of healthy young adult deaths during the 1918 influenza pandemic, which killed 50 to 100 million people”
1918.
Tres Cool
on February 26, 2020 at 10:06 pm
And that link fails to reference fatalities. At best the theory is causal and anecdotal.
It’s all speculation, since the phenomenon wasn’t even understood in 1918.
Tres Cool
on February 26, 2020 at 11:18 pm
You made my point for me.
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 11:26 pm
RIP one of my greatgrandfathers.
DenverJ
on February 26, 2020 at 9:52 pm
Fun fact: I am a strep carrrier, and haven’t had the flu since a child.
Y’all bring your coronavirus, and I’ll kick it’s ass, too.
Freaking Chinese- think they can just manufacture a virus and good, law abiding Americans will just put up with it? I don’t think so, commies!
That sickness I had a couple of weeks ago was actually Strep B. I’d been sick for a couple of weeks and didn’t know it and then I just felt OFF one day and went to urgent care.
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 10:17 pm
No vaccine, no prior immunity in humans, high transmissibility, apparently transmissible while asymptomatic, possible aerosolized in certain conditions, higher mortality rate*, higher complication rate*
*the denominator of total infections is likely undercounted but to an unknown degree
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 10:04 pm
My vampire-like eternal boyish good looks prevent me from growing a proper beard (I think).
Just think about how much I save on razors.
pistoffnick
on February 26, 2020 at 9:56 pm
{looks at Amish goatee in the mirror}
Fuck! I’m dead.
Pope Jimbo
on February 26, 2020 at 10:14 pm
Well, something good came out of my ineptness I guess.
I was trimming up my winter beard last week and I managed to mangle it so badly that I ended up just shaving it off. Now, I guess I’ll stop telling the truth and tell everyone that I did it to stop the coronavirus
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 10:24 pm
That’s misleading. That graphic is for people using respirators (which includes N95 masks), mainly in an occupational setting. The CDC is absolutely not recommending trimming beards and more so, they’re strongly recommending the general public to not wear masks outside of occupational requirements or if sick.
Ontario’s Cout of Appeal has ruled Peter Khill, the man found not guilty after admitting he shot and killed Jon Styres, should again stand trial for second degree murder.
slumbrew - double secret satan
on February 26, 2020 at 10:19 pm
I’m guessing Canada has no double-jeopardy protections?
*googles* Yeah, they’re weak – prosecution can appeal an acquittal.
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 10:24 pm
Actually there is but it is only for “final acquittal” and since acquittals can be appealed…
straffinrun
on February 26, 2020 at 10:22 pm
You can join our Free Speech Union, but you need to agree to our values.
We are wallowing in the glory of your fantabulous animation!
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 10:57 pm
Had to sit through a lot of rally audio, but that bathroom line was a nugget worth sifting for.
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 11:00 pm
Picking the ? out of the ? ?
Chafed
on February 27, 2020 at 12:26 am
Bingo
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 12:30 am
And duh, it was 2 lines. One where Trump was talking about how CNN will put a camera on an empty seat at a rally when someone has to go to the bathroom, and I forget the actual context of the rest of the sentence comes from, but my brain said right away those need to be spliced together.
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 12:34 am
Oh yeah, the “And I’m trying to act like it doesn’t hurt” he was talking about firm handshakes from graduating military cadets.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 12:44 am
firm handshakes
Not a ‘hearty’ handshake, though? And, no laurel, either?
Gustave Lytton
on February 26, 2020 at 10:57 pm
Another excellent creation in the books. Good work!
I just threw together a ghetto chicken florentine….#DrunkChow
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:06 pm
Just got home from work a bit ago, just getting the drinking started here.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:10 pm
Know that I have passed the glory of H&H on to other glibs–in the form of A VINYL STICKER!!!
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:13 pm
Once my checks are regular again I’m gonna get high on my own supply and buy a few things for self I think.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:19 pm
Damn right.
Now, I gotta put the one I’m holding on to on my LL* (still have a spare).
*NCIC code for “carry-all”, or, SUV, to you normies
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 10:52 pm
Mr Splosives announced that it was time for dessert and presented me with a surprise drink. It had banana slices decorating the rim of the glass, and in it was a milky chocolate-y looking thing. I drank it was was most pleased at the “banana split” sort of feel.
He then told me it was Bailey’s and Fireball.
The man has his faults, but he is gifted in mixology for damned sure.
Please watch if you like Australia, rock n roll, the occult, and beer and weed and psychedelic rock. And vultures. And shitty 70’s flicks.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:35 pm
For those about to rock, we salute you!
I happened to be at the stoplight at the foot of the mountain to my house on the way home tonight. In the lane next to me, a couple of young bucks revved their giant Dodge truck engine and openly scoffed at my little tesla. I unrolled the windows and cranked up the Acca-Dacca that happened to be playing at the time.
They were really revving for a battle royale.
As soon as the light went green, I shot up that twisty windy 1000 foot rise at 70 mph without a sweat. The 4000 lb Tesla hugs tight as a drum and maneuvers like a dream. After a bit, I glanced in the rear view mirror and the dudes were puffing great clouds of diesel and not getting up that hill.
“Are you ready to die?”
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:14 pm
Oh my.
(lolz)
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:23 pm
I’ve got the weekend off then I switch. I think I’m just gonna stay up drinking all night Sunday night to shift my schedule. Maybe get some good liquor with the first paycheck.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:27 pm
what’s 3rd shift? Like, 3 AM to 10 or something? And time zone?
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:30 pm
What, 10p-6a, 11p-7a? Something along those lines…
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:36 pm
yeah, 10p-6a CT
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:44 pm
3rd Shift Bros!
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:48 pm
Yeah, but I’ll be on blackout 🙁
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:50 pm
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:29 pm
Maybe get some good liquor
??????
Wait….this isn’t gonna be, like, ‘Red Dog Dry’, or some other secret Red Dog concoction, is it?
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:40 pm
I’m thinking that maybe if I make really weak mixed drinks my stomach hopefully will let me have some Jameson. I love Whiskey, but my stomach now hates it. But maybe if I baby it I can enjoy some.
egould310
on February 26, 2020 at 11:31 pm
Get some good liquor with your first paycheck. You earned it, working man.
“I’ve got the weekend off then I switch. I think I’m just gonna stay up drinking all night Sunday night to shift my schedule. Maybe get some good liquor with the first paycheck.”
Alternatively, you could write something of interest and relevance to yourself to review at at later date. It does not necessarily have be a diary or journal as such is defined.
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:41 pm
I do all my writing while drunk, so that is a distinction without a difference.
Charles Easterly
on February 27, 2020 at 12:00 am
“I do all my writing while drunk, so that is a distinction without a difference.”
Even so, you could write something of interest and relevance to yourself to review at at later date. It does not necessarily have be a diary or journal as such is defined.
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 11:39 pm
Speaking of Trump and India isn’t it interesting that Dalmia was complaining about how some Hindu nationalist desire to destroy the Taj Mahal even though it is a government monument to Mughal Imperialists who killed numerous Hindus? Not to mention those Chinese Emperors did some pretty nasty stuff. And it’s not like the people who built the stuff ISIS or the Taliban destroyed did not have a nasty history either.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:50 pm
How is Dalmia permanently stricken with PMS?
And how is she still employed by Reason? Is she “talented” in some ways we shouldn’t ask about?
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 11:57 pm
Well she likes immigrants and hates Trump so…
Winston
on February 26, 2020 at 11:57 pm
Also the Taj Mahal was built not too long after the first slaves were imported to America and the Mughals were not overthrow until just before the American Civil War started,
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:47 pm
Meditation nugget of the hour:
Matthew 6:27 “Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” — Some wise dude named Jesus of Nazareth
CPRM
on February 26, 2020 at 11:50 pm
That dude sounds like he was LIT.
hayeksplosives
on February 26, 2020 at 11:54 pm
Jesus sounds like he’d have been an awesome dude to be around, even if you didn’t believe He was the son of God.
He liked to laugh, he tossed scammers out of the temple, befriended the “outcasts”. Lived his words. Liked a good joke too.
Lord Digby declares Victory
on February 26, 2020 at 11:59 pm
And was, by all accounts a skilled tradesman (Tekton), and a cook, too (Jn 21: 9-12).
KSuellington
on February 26, 2020 at 11:57 pm
“Worrying is like paying a debt you may never have owed in the first place.”
-some wise old Irishman
hayeksplosives
on February 27, 2020 at 12:10 am
Pharisees: “So, are you claiming to be the Son of God?” (attempting to entrap Jesus into “blasphemy”)
Jesus of Nazareth: “You say that I am.”
Jesus of Nazareth, 2020 remake with Jeff Bridges: “Well, that’s just like, your opinion, man.”
Two avitar changes in the last like 20 minutes? Are you trying to transition? What are your preferred pronouns?
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 12:45 am
Two?? Nope–just this one.
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 12:48 am
I mean it might be the same picture, but there was kilt before.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 12:52 am
OK, now it’s 2 changes.
I don’t think I’ve ventured into kilt territory before now… You, uh, “having some libations”, are ya?
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 1:03 am
Maybe the NSA is screwing with me, I swear there was an avitar of this type when I posted that comment.
KSuellington
on February 27, 2020 at 12:25 am
Another good one CP, thanks.
So I got to talking politics with a regular customer who I see several times a year for a job. I generally avoid that topic unless the person really stays on the subject, and even then sometimes not. He got a visa to come here in 1983 from Nicaragua. He saw the Marxist shitshow that was about to go down a couple years before when he was in his early 20’s. His friends and some of his relatives told him that he shouldn’t take off and that the revolution was going to be a positive. A couple years later they were begging him to get them out. “Damn K, I can’t believe people are falling for that same shit here. This is the only country left. Where else are we supposed to go? It’s easy to see why you can’t have socialism; it’s puro propaganda and they are very good at it, but come on man. This isn’t that hard to figure out.”
I like how there is a Bloomberg ad before that video. That man is dropping some serious coin. It’s all about Bernie though. I hadn’t thought he would get the nomination before, but it really is a chance he will. I’m hoping that he will as then the choice is laid out. The Dems will be staking their rep on an avowed socialist, which will in all hope, get resoundedly denied. And Glibs.tv will call for four more years of the Hat and the Hair.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 12:53 am
It shows the narcissism inherent in people, but, especially in many younger Americans–“Oh, it’ll work this time, because I’m gonna be there, making changes, and I’m the smartest person I know!!”
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 12:57 am
And Glibs.tv will call for four more years of the Hat and the Hair.
Oh, even if he loses, I can stretch it out for a bit with both the Hat and Hair berating him as he sits in a wife beater and boxers in Trump Tower, as long as he continues to give speeches. And maybe Bernie’s dentures talk to him or something, I’ll let SF cook that gag up. As long as I’m not put in cattle car (or get bored or too busy), I’ll try to keep the cartoons going.
KSuellington
on February 27, 2020 at 1:07 am
You are about to hit the goldmine of material. This election should provide a massive amount of hilarious audio.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:07 am
KSue speak much truth!
KSuellington
on February 27, 2020 at 12:56 am
The fellow is highly well spoken and telegenic. He really hates the communism, I’d love to see him on tv. Glib en espanol.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 12:58 am
Heh, one of the things from work I can talk about is our random discussions. My supervisor I think is a bit younger than me, and the other guys I was working with are EARLY 20s. Somehow Rick-Rolling got brought up, my supervisor said he didn’t mind it because he likes the song, I said it wasn’t as bad as two girls one cup. Glad that one went away.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:15 am
Hah! Sounds like a semi-decent supervisor, at least.
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 1:21 am
Yeah, new supervisor next week. I like this guy. Hopefully what the department head told me is true and a new hire will come along soon and they’ll stick him on 3rd shift. Although, the shift changes keep changing my days off. One of the things I was looking forward to was a more stable schedule. And schedules, like other documents can’t leave our workspace, so I have to keep writing myself notes.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:29 am
Based on what I know and what you’ve told me (you’ll be more aware overall), they probably do favor seniority, as in, it getting more say in scheduling and the like. Of course, you have to actually put in the time to get it. But, if that is correct, perseverance tends to pay off.
Also, I had questions about what is available to you for retirement. If you’re keen to, we can talk in smoke signals emails.
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 1:36 am
401K package, different levels of aggressiveness or direct portfolio choice. I went mildly aggressive. I’m at least a decade behind my age cohort in that arena, so try to build a bit fast and then slow down.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:38 am
Huh….I have some follow-up questions I’ll ask about in those smoke signals.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:39 am
Later on–not nec. tonight.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:01 am
Up to five years–too light, or, too harsh? Discuss.
KSuellington
on February 27, 2020 at 1:12 am
In a better run system she would be paying him half of her earnings for the next decade to offset what she did and not going in a cage unless she didn’t do that. But since paying the crime victim back is not a priority, she deserves a few years for sure. Give her 8 months for good behavior.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:19 am
You know, the idea of double dipping (civil & criminal) maybe should come into play here. Really, her charge/conviction is really more about lying to the government than it is about harming him. Yeah, it’s both, but, technically it’s about lying/filing a false report.
That charge/crime is an interesting discussion in and of itself, but, until it goes away, he should get $ from her (like you said) to offset. If she trashes your rep, you get a check.
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 1:17 am
Miranda Overton
That window is getting into hotdog in a hallway territory.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 1:20 am
Excellent! I completely missed that.
leon
on February 27, 2020 at 6:01 am
Twenty-one year-old Miranda Overton and an unidentified soldier engaged in a sexual relationship in 2018.
To avoid the shame of having her significant other discover the affair, the woman insisted that the sailor raped her.
In 2018, Overton, of Chesapeake, Virginia, claimed that the soldier …
Gah!!!! Was he a soldier or a sailor.
And you’ll kill me if it ends up that he was a marine.
Formalising access to a woman’s body takes us back centuries, to a culture obsessed with maintaining a strict economy of purity. Historical “seduction laws” were ostensibly used to protect both a woman’s right to her body and a man’s good name. The point of sexual liberation, when it came, was that people of all genders should be able to meet as equals and have sex because both parties desire it. That rape still exists is not a reason to abandon this ideal, or the sexual autonomy of women.
I made that Change.org petition to make Trump force Adult Swim air Hat and Hair, so now they send me random petitions, this is the one I got today:
Change.org
Cartoon — How do we – as a society – end sex trafficking? For many, it’s a complicated question with complex answers. For Laila, the place to start is with Pornhub. And thousands of people agree. Together, they’re pushing to shut down the pornography website. They won’t rest until the CEO is held responsible for sex trafficking linked to the online business.
This is why we can’t have nice things!
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:02 am
Wow, I can’t believe we haven’t caught on to the FACT that all people in porn were made to do so against their individual will! As soon as porn goes away, no more ‘sex trafficking’!
Also, I do think the phrase should be ‘sex traffricking’
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 2:10 am
Until it’s TrafFUCKING, the PR has failed.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:13 am
NOW you’re Texing it up, my man!
Winston
on February 27, 2020 at 2:10 am
Is this a socon or a feminist?
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:12 am
When all is said and done, does it matter?
hayeksplosives
on February 27, 2020 at 2:30 am
If a feminist falls down in the woods and there’s no one to hear it, is she still ugly?
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:33 am
Trick question: Feminists don’t fall–they are pushed down by the Patriarchy
hayeksplosives
on February 27, 2020 at 2:36 am
Well, I can’t argue with that logic. I’m just a girl.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:39 am
Tee Hee! ?
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:40 am
Dang–coulda used ?
CPRM
on February 27, 2020 at 2:15 am
Alt-right, gonna watch a documentary on swords. Night. Thanks for watching. Stay tuned for words from our sponsor. the Letter x.
hayeksplosives
on February 27, 2020 at 2:23 am
Peace out, you.
hayeksplosives
on February 27, 2020 at 2:29 am
*hayek takes night medications, sets alarm, gets in bed.
Dead silence and peace.
Hayek turns on electric heating pad on hip.
Cat detects heat source from 80 yards away, awakens, jumps into bed on Hayeksplosives’ hip.
Cats are freaking scary predators.
Lord Digby's Spirit Animal
on February 27, 2020 at 2:31 am
Maybe someone has an idea – or debating random silliness might give me an idea, but I’m trying to figure out how to add tension to a story when the setting itself sort of deflates the stakes.
The main character gets his hands on a portable door, which always leads back to the same place no matter where it’s moved to. (There are a few other rules, but they don’t come into play) That place is part of a manor in an abandoned dwarf city that sealed its doors during the collapse of the empire. As such, the residents ended up starving, resorting to cannibalism, and dying out. This left a lot of them to rise as revenants and wander the streets.
The story I want to write involves the narrator clearing out a foothold around the portable door out to a specific barricaded perimeter so they can use it as a base for things they do in the part of the world they’re normally in.
The problem is, the fact that they can simply retreat through the portable door at any time and once again be safe makes it hard to ratchet up the tension. All they lose is the use of the neato portable base.
Gender Traitor
on February 27, 2020 at 6:12 am
Can there be (at least) one revenant left in the manor, perhaps lurking there so that they may or may not have to confront it if they retreat through the door?
If they retreat through the door, they’ve left the manor and are a few thousand miles away from the revenants. It’s possible for some to get between them and the door, which may happen because someone goes “if we get in trouble we just run back out.” Probably the narrator, since it’s his door.
No. In fact, anyone not with the guy with the key can’t use the door at all. Meaning if they split up or get separated, the party without the key is stuck.
Simple. No matter how much stuff you store in the city, the door still weighs exactly the same. That’s a lot of cargo capacity. Besides, when cleaned up, the manor is a nice house, so when you’re in the ass end of nowhere, you still have access to some of the comforts of home… just ignore the shuffling and moaning outside the barricades.
straffinrun
on February 27, 2020 at 6:44 am
“ just ignore the shuffling and moaning outside the barricades.”
I suppose the best approach would be early overconfidence. They acknowledge “We have this easy escape route, it won’t be hard to get away” and then explore too far and get cut off from said escape.
JD is Unemployed
on February 27, 2020 at 6:23 am
Are there some new crying Jordan memes from the Kobe memorial thing?
straffinrun
on February 27, 2020 at 6:30 am
PM Abe just announced that all schools elementary to HS are recommended to close for the next month due to corona. My kid is ecstatic.
JD is Unemployed
on February 27, 2020 at 6:35 am
Will there be some sort of remote learning/virtual classroom style setup instead?
straffinrun
on February 27, 2020 at 6:36 am
Doesn’t look like it. Just extra vacay for the kids.
Can kids spread it, seems reasonable with an infectious disease, close down places where dirty people may contact the clean.
Gustave Lytton
on February 27, 2020 at 6:59 am
Children are being infected. Mortality & complications requiring hospital care is weighted towards the higher risk groups (elderly or other risk factors), but is not limited to those groups.
Lackadaisical
on February 27, 2020 at 7:05 am
Maybe that’s what it was. sounds perfect to me, How else will we ever reduce entitlement spending?
Gustave Lytton
on February 27, 2020 at 6:53 am
But leave the after school clubs open!
(Which kind of defeats the whole purpose for closure)
It only hurts for a little while
Try some lotion, Fourscore!
It rubs the lotion on its skin.
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/ERteBE8WAAANV2q.jpg:large
Eat more fiber?
LOL @ the ending!!
+1
So good!
Yep, solid.
I think the hair needs to get laid. Way too uptight.
Have you heard the joke about the constipated mathematician?
He worked it out with a pencil.
And it Doesn’t Hurt, Brilliant!
What up, nightshift?
A new cartoon, goodie! Back in a few.
night? Az is still daytime, for a bit,
Yes, but the shift just started. And it’s now evening in God’s Time Zone, the Central.
We never shift, ZAP!
Heh. I heard that’s because you all hate Martin Luther King or something.
Oh shit! Hate to HyR but I forgot the next few hours of my life are accounted for.
Have fun, aim for high spirits and I’ll snark at you later.
Sitting in a smokey house because I don’t know how to cook, on call so I can’t have too much fun so I’m sipping a Heineken in jam jam pants.
Hawt
Jam jam pants?
Zubaz
Zubaz
From the guys who made them famous.
Hell, I’d could go for the old, knock-off pair I had back in ’90.
Probably a good thing I can’t find a picture of them.
Why hasn’t Weird Al redone Avril Lavigne’s Complicated as constipated?
I hate you right now for making me remember the chorus to that song.
Your punishment:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=y-jC3H_8Dk4
Sure, but you can sing along to the chorus as if Weird Al had redone it “why’d you go get so constipated?”.
Until Al creates the tune, all I’ll hear is Avril. Curse you for that.
She was cute, I’ll give her that. In a dull eyed, stoner wannabe punk who melted into your couch one night at a party and somehow never left kinda way.
And I raise you, and yes I did see them perform this live just not this show.
I can see the appeal in that. Theatrical, funny, enough musical and singing talent to not make it painful to listen to, and most importantly not taking itself seriously.
I found Pop Punk in the late nineties and early aughts borderline offensive.
He kinda did.
Not that I’m a huge fan, but I did not know this.
Speaking of which, the Banana is Weird Al. Quote me on that.
If you watch the show, you’ll know what I’m talking about.
The Hat, The Hair, The Turtlehead.
He’s wearing skates? Yeah… In July
Are you sure that’s the link you wanted?
It is a great song. But that will teach me to jump between threads!
Here.
Skates in July
What Tundra’s link makes me feel
Back at ya, Ted!
I didn’t listen to it in the last thread and now I have a nice earworm in my head.
Get rid of it with this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XUd2S8a2ChQ
Lol! Sloopy did it this morning.
robc’s solution via SF
It works.
Except I posted good music…by a good band.
Mild difference.
Not this?
Good music means shit. It’s the structure of the song.
Science, dude.
A well-constructed song
I said it (the Dionne Warwick link) was a nice earworm. And while I like Yes, I don’t need another earworm right now.
I would have suggested this.
I heard that tune driving into Portland today. When I was a kid, I’d get a lttle boner every time Dionne was on TV. Carol Burnett Show, Love Boat, whatever. 7 year old egould knew exactly what was up.
driving into Portland
I’m sorry.
It was Gopher, wasn’t it.
All Bernie Kopell, all the time.
It’s nice how it was totally OK that the ship’s doctor spent all his time pursuing and banging the bejesus out of the female passengers.
I loved that show so much.
Knight Rider, Love Boat, and Fantasy Island.
Now you know what’s wrong with me.
I was indifferent to Knight Rider but the other two were definitely staples in my house growing up.
Kitt’s voice was lame. If it was a K car, maybe it would have fit.
But Bonnie was rockin’ and it was another show where the incompetent government couldn’t get shit done or was actively on the take from the bad guys and a private actor had to come in and save the day.
Shoulda stuck with a winner, in my humble opinion.
I watched lots and lots of games shows on days off from school.
Game show bro! Which did you prefer?
Siegfried > Doc
Cocaine Julie Tewes.
And I Googled it; doesn’t look like Dionne was on Love Boat. She just sang the titular song for the ninth and final season.
Actually, I enjoyed that trip through the past but then I was reminded of “Say a Little Prayer” and was very happier bigly.
The Men of wikiFeet Aren’t the Heels You Think They Are
Community.
Just trying to spread a “community” of jizz on those feet. Like random Drunken asshole says, “show me dem toesies.”
You misspelled circle jerk.
No one likes Crusty but ‘jerk’ seems a bit harsh.
How’s hubby?
Good, relatively speaking. Pneumonia (acute thing) and an appointment with a pulmonologist tomorrow to find out what the chronic things are going on inside his lungs. They specifically said nothing looked cancerous, so that’s off the table.
He’s got high-powered antibiotics and with any luck, he’ll be able to get a full five days off work with short-term disability.
Don’t wanna say that I’m glad to hear that, but I guess that is a good thing all things considered.
Yeah, compared to everything else going on, this is a blip.
Sorry. I hope he heals up quickly.
Hey! My tits are up here, you pervert.
You’re not *that* young.
Hello, boys….
I appreciate butts on several levels.
<a href="https://whowhatwhy.org/2020/02/26/mayor-pete-and-the-spies-who-love-him/"Mayor Pete and the Spies Who Love Him
Holy fudge.
None of you will read the story anyway so why bother with a good link! WHY BOTHER?
I read it.
Whatever, Pinnocnegro.
So when he lies what precisely grows?
I think I watched a documentary about that.
Was it on the BBC?
On the BBC!
The BBC was involved, yes.
Comment from the link:
” My aunt always loved the BBC. That’s what she said on Craigslist, anyway. “
Continuing with the theme:
his arrest record
his number of baby mamas
his sneaker collection
SHUT THE FUCK UP, GLIBTARD!
?
Deep.
a working link
They liked the spies when the spies were going after Trump….
And… I’m out.
Dude… basic facts.
Now I get it; Pete reminds me of Glen.
/Glen was played by the Agent Smith-type guy in the first Deadpool. Yeah, him.
Ethan Hunt > James Bond > Bryan Mills > Jason Bourne
Did you hit your head recently?
James Bond>Mitch Rapp>Jason Bourne>Bryan Mills>Ethan Hunt
My goodness this is the most wrong you have ever been wrong.
Damn shame the screwed up the initial attempt at a Mitch Rapp movie. I enjoyed those books quite a bit, prior to Vince Flynn passing. I think I made it 4 chapters into the first Rapp book by the new author, Kyle Mills – oy.
It’s like Mills had never even read a Rapp book. Zero nuance, Rapp is just an unstoppable killing machine.
He played lax!
So, Vince was a local dude.
My sister worked for a literary agent to whom he submitted his first book, Term Limits. The agent rejected it but Vince was a beast and decided to self-publish. My sis helped with editing and got credits in the first book and a character in another. We got to know him quite well, so I was always a big fan. It was weird when he got famous.
I highly recommend his books. I’ve read the Mills ones and, while not nearly as good, I just want the character to keep going. Like Mack Bolan.
Pffft.
Johnny English>everyone else.
Johnny Guitar>Johnny English
Johnny Ramone>Johnny Rotten>Johnny Rivers>Joan Rivers
Johhny Tremaine> Johnny Appleseed> Johnny Reb >Johnny B. Goode
Rivers Cuomo > Perry Como > Mario Cuomo > Super Mario
I’ll allow it but only if Rivers is singing rather than attempting to interact with others like a normal person might.
You got your hash pipe?
Are you high? Mario Cuomo>super mario?
No.
You probably think Spaghettios = gazpacho.
Mario Andretti > Mario Puzo > Mario Lopez > Mario Cuomo < Maria Bartiromo
Doc Savage would kick all their asses at the same time.
One day imma gona to Malta to bigga hotell
In the morning I go down to eat a breakfast
I tell the waitress I wanna 2 pisses of toast
She brings me only one piss!
I tell her I wanna two piss
She say ‘go to the toilet’
I say you don’t understand
I want two piss on my plate
She say you better no piss on the plate
You son of a beetch!
I don’t even know the lady
And she calls me the son of a beetch!
Later, I go eat at a bigga resturant
The waitress bring me a spoon and a knife, but no fuk!
I tell her i wanna the fuk
She tell me everyone wanna fuck
I tell her you don’t understand
I wanna you fuk on the table
She say you better not fuck on the table
You son of a beech!
So I go back to my room in a hotel
And there is no sheeats on the bed
Call the manager and I’m tellin him i wanna sheeat!
He tellin me go to the toilet
I say No! You no understanda me I wanna a shit on my bed!
He say you better not shit on my bed
You son of a beetch!
I go to the check out and the man in the desk says
Peace on you, i said piss on you too you son oF a beetch!
I go back to Italia, Arrivederci!
Tl; dc
(Too long; didn’t click)
Ts:dc
(Too scared; didn’t click)
Are you a Vampire?
No, a Buster.
…also known as a Buster.
Mojeaux and HM are sock puppets and got their accounts reversed?
SHUT THE FUCK UP GLIBTARD!
Dang, they were cute!
Didn’t one of those chicks burn down Andre Rison’s house?
Yep, Lisa “Left Eye” Lopes (RIP).
… in 1994, when she was arrested for setting fire to Andre Rison’s sneakers in a bathtub, which ultimately spread to the mansion they shared and destroyed it. She claimed that Rison had beaten her after a night out, and she set fire to his shoes to get back at him but that burning down the house was an accident.
Yes. Left Eye (the deceased one) did. She set some things on fire in the bathtub and it got out of hand.
I love TLC. Left Eye breaks it down.
Left Eye breaks it down.
Yep. That’s the music business in a nutshell.
It’s a brutal one.
Sure were. Had a huge crush on them when I was little.
If your ass is a buster 2-1-3 will regulate
I just recently learned that Ray Parker Jr was one hell of a songwriter and musician before the Ghostbustin’ thing. He wrote and played the nasty guitar on Rufus’s You’ve got the Love por ejemplo.
But, not this Buster….right?
Bravo.
My husband was at a DMV settling a ticket, and the clerk plopped a bill on the counter.
Mr Splosives says “What’s this?”
Clerk: “It’s a fine.”
Mr Splosives: “No, it’sa notta fine, it’sa robbery!
I shrank away in an “I don’t even know this guy” nonchalance.
Hmm, his jib I like the cut of
Are you crazy? That’s perfect!
I feared that the little Eichmann behind the desk would get him arrested.
Lol. Better bring some big cops!
Yeah, mr Splosives is a whole lotta wop!
*sensible chuckle*
Chico Marx lives!
This guy knows from Carbonara.
Fuck him. Auntie Fee is where it’s at.
We’ll adda little of the salta.
*adds half the fucken box of salt*
I also cook in a complete chef getup at home.
Serious question though, what do people think about having the pan and oil cold when he starts frying the garlic?
I defer to food-nerd Kenji:
On the other hand, if you want to, say, soften up some onions or garlic without browning them, you don’t want to preheat the oil too much or you’ll end up caramelizing or burning the exterior of the onion pieces before they get a chance to soften and cook through.
Yeah, but I do like some mild carmelization for most dishes, can’t really think where you wouldn’t want just a little browning. I guess it depends a bit on how you’re cutting and cooking as well, but onions tend not to burn on me.
That was my take, he isn’t really ‘frying’ the garlic and peppers, he’s heating the oil and infusing it, so very low temp. Notice he hardly fucks with it and yet there is almost no color to the garlic.
Only way to be sure is to taste it, but I don’t think you could get the oil infused with much of the flavor that quickly, especially at a low temp.
Oddly, I’ve accepted I might get the coronavirus, but I don’t care. I doubt it will affect me more than a cold. /Healthy AF.
Hell, I was near death with Influenza A in the hospital a couple of years ago. They forgot to check for pneumonia (turns out that is why I couldn’t breathe).
Antibiotics and steroids put my right as rain quickly, once I had grabbed the doctor by the sleeve and told her I did not want to die this way and that something was very very wrong, thus prompting the X-ray and lung culture that showed the pneumonia that was about to kill me.
I honestly don’t think Coronavirus is that scary.
Global cooling. Acid rain. Y2K. Dot com bubble. Global warming. Swine flue. War on Christmas. #metoo. West Nile Virus. Ebola. Refugee crisis. Autonomous hand guns.
And yet we are still here.
I am with you on this. I have a suspicion that the high mortality rate is actually due to the fact that only the very sick are seeking medical care and being tracked. I suspect the number of cases in china is actually much higher than reported and that the death rate is actually well under 1%.
The widespread smoking in China can’t be helping with the pneumonia.
Based on what people say about the smog there…
I’m hope too that the denominator is underreported due to asymptomatic and mild cases. The bigger problem than just the mortality rate is the number that require hospital level care, which could overload medical care to the point of triaging patients, both Covid-19 infected and the regular caseload.
The best case scenario now is slow the spread and reduce the number of people infected at one time. Personal hygiene (washing hands, not touching hands to face, covering cough, staying home if sick or symptomatic) can help a lot with that.
You forgot Net Neutrality.
That’s right! We are dead from net neutrality and Cotizens United!
The disease itself isn’t so scary. The proactive measures and the resulting economic impact is another story. We’re already feeling that here.
Yeah, I think it’s going to get worse. Reducing the number of possible person to person contacts will reduce the rate of spread and likelihood of a Wuhan (or at this point, Iran is probably a better example) overload. I’d give it 50/50 that the Olympics are canceled. Lots of unknowns at this point.
Travel is going to get hammered hard.
I’m not even sure there’s such a thing as a flu. In the last 20 years my temperature never exceeded 38C (=100.4F). Make it 30+ years, if I ignore one instance of food poisoning.
It’s a real thing alright. When you go to your regular doctor because you “don’t feel so good” and she calls an ambulance to take you to the ER from the clinic because she can see your skin sinking into your collar bone and neck muscles as you breathe, you know there is flu.
She even called the ER ahead of time so they’d be ready for me!
I got the flu last week, I went to work because I just felt a little tired. Eventually I went home and sat around for a day and was better the next.
I only know I got the flu because my son caught it after me and he got sick enough that we tested him.
Corona is probably for wusses.
It suxx if you are immunocompromised to begin with. I take some stuff that suppresses my immune system due to autoimmune diseases (very funny, body. Nice work killing yourself).
So I was vulnerable and it handed my ass to me. Also with epilepsy, fever is a big seizure trigger, so I do my best to avoid exposure.
For Trump.
jesus.
Is that supposed to hypnotize you into shitting?
This is a summary of every Glibs comment thread.
Pretty much.
Just no.
It must be just what they all needs…
He just be pumpin’ every one of ’em up with all the bag
fulla The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
I… what?
He means sausagey semen.
If you weren’t a double secret satan you’d know all about this.
The song is based on real life events.
Ah, old people musical reference. Gotcha.
“straffin san. Konnichiwa. Could you come into our office today and give your presentation to Asuka-san? She was home sick when you gave us your presentation.”
I gave that presentation to 20 people and they think I’m gonna take 3 hours out of my day off to give it one on one to some dolt who missed it. Told them I’d do it again for 200 bucks. “Uh, well, we will pay for your lunch and transportation.” People are assholes.
Unless she’s the capo di tutti i capi, “no”. Here’s are the slides.
Phone it in. Can’t bottle the lightning.
I did offer to skype it. 100 bucks for that. They balked.
Geez. Penny wise and yen foolish.
In what world do you do stuff for free?
Also 100 bucks is like nothing. Just say’n.
It’s all about greasing the wheel for me. I tend to do all the little extra things for my clients so that they always come back to me. Sometimes it means doing stuff like this. *shrugs* Maybe I’m not doing it the best way, but I’m constantly getting calls from people asking me to work for them. Word of mouth references are huuuuge here.
Yeah, I get that it all depends on what else you might be able to monetize thanks to that, it just seems funny for them to complain about paying that small a fee (assuming it is a bigger business, which I suppose it is if there are even 20 people to talk to).
Of course, if shes the trigger puller, I would have just said yes myself. 😛
Time to start raising your prices.
Maybe. I average 50/hour. Other people doing what I do make more, but I get more work. Been doing this hodge podge style of work for 20 years and I’ve settled into how I do it.
/Stubborn old man
Sorry if I sound flippant, obviously you know a lot more about what you’re doing and the market you’re in.
I could never be a business owner, I have the wrong temperament for it I think.
Not flippant at all. “Time to start raising your prices” is the question that has befuddled me for years.
Billing larger businesses for small fees is onerous and often difficult for budget-holders.
@Straff, when was the last time you raised your prices?
I often deal with businesses that notify their customers that they will be raising prices.
The lead time of the raise is at least 3 months. Usually they reach out to customers during the “slow period”. This gives the customer a chance to negotiate terms, and budget For the new pricing
Some customers might balk, others will sign on. It’s all a negotiation.
Find out which clients really value your service.
Give yourself a raise.
100 smackers…geeze, that’s a lot of hair cuts in your area!
According to Anthrax you can breathe lightning.
Ferrera > Lynch > Jarmusch
BJ > HJ > listening
^^^ this guy gets it.
“You know the best way to give a HJ? Use your mouth.” – Tucker Max
I like listening to blow jobs. It’s why I hang out in the bathroom stalls all day.
I miss the Earth so much,
I miss my Wife,
It’s lonely out in space,
Say what you may about public schools and the teacher’s union, but
Mars aint the kind of place to raise your kids.
In fact its cold as hell.
And there’s no one there to raise them-
if ya dig.
Like the Star People!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O63jQEw-B-A
Stars Explode https://youtu.be/f2NCK1LiW9g
“I’m trying to act like it doesn’t hurt.”
Nice ending.
Hey, is there any interest in scheduling a Glibs virtual meetup by Telecon? I’ve floated the idea before, but now I wanted to put it out there in “prime time” to gauge interest. I’d handle the logistics of the dial in number if so.
One logistics issue, how will HM send us weird links to look at?
I will strip on cam.
I’m in.
Only if you pick some decent music to strip to.
If you try twerking to that Tuva bullshit you linked to below, I don’t care if I can bounce a quarter off your ass!
I already have your numbers. Why would we involve the freaks?
“I already have your numbers.”
Clearly I am putting aside my typical demeanor upon these unhallowed threads (in which one or two commentators described me as gentlemanly)…
Tundra, are the numbers you have in mind the ones mentioned several times in this song from a heavy metal band?
Here is, in my opinion given the ages of the performers, quite a decent version of the same song: Number of the Beast by Iron Maiden/O’Keefe Music Foundation
Why would we involve the freaks?
Uffda, you could at least check around for a second to see if I’m around. Words hurt!
On a serious note, I think that the Minnesoda Crewe should find a place to meet up locally for this dial in. Sure it would be awkward being the only ones wearing pants, I’m sure it would still be fun.
Waist up only?
I’m assuming no video. Sorry, everybody.
“I’m assuming no video. Sorry, everybody.”
Perhaps you can “attend” whilst disabling/covering your video apparatus, Rhywun
What about the Aussie Glibs? Are you really suggesting that they have to stand on their heads just to comply with your prudish demands?
I just figured you were going to show up half pixelated.
It’d be simpler to just turn the camera upside down.
They tried that Mr. Genius. The problem was that the tripod couldn’t be balanced and kept falling over when they tried turning the camera upside down.
Really? Then they didn’t know how to operate a tripod. Who were your test cases?
My face?
Where ever you have hair growing. You know the rules.
Sure, if I happen to be free that evening.
(Free defined as being sober enough to use a computer, and the woman being asleep. It’s a fine line.)
Weren’t you and CPRM going to do a Glibcast? Anything going on there? Or was that someone else? Judge Nap maybe?
Maybe.
I’m in. Also, does this mean what I think it means for my Night Shift post?
I’ve constructively criticized CPRM’s animation before, so I want to say the squinting Trump was done masterfully, the left eye in particular, subtle but enough that I was just starting to think ‘what’s with his eye?’ right before The Hair starts questioning Trump’s health. Great Job CPRM.
Yeah, I think the quality has been improved lately. Kudos CPRM.
Yep, I noticed that left eye too. Almost subconsciously.
With these railroad blockades it is increasingly clear that much of Canada’s elite thinks of Canada as a Genocidal Settler State. And no that is not an exaggeration. How does that fit in with post-nationalism? The Nation State is bad but the state isn’t
And this will come to the US eventually. They are already moving from the Confederates to the Founding Fathers for owning slaves and then to Lincoln and co. for creating a genocidal settler state. I mean who lived in those territories the Republicans didn’t want slaveowners to live in?
Ayup.
How does gamboling figure into this?
?
Just my was of admitting that I have no idea what you are on about, again.
Funny Lackaisical and Q know full well what I talking about.
Also how parochial of you.
See, now you made me have to look up another word.
While you’re at it, could you look up the following:
comity
sartorial
derivative
slurry
hygiene.
I know
threetwo of those words all ready.How do you think the settlers got there?
“The Nation State is bad but the state isn’t”
You’re thinking too hard about it; everything they do is to accumulate and retain power. They don’t have logic, principles or reason, trying to make sense of it is pointless. The only thing they care about is raw power; the boot stomping on a face forever. They treat the Nation as illegitimate because it serves a purpose in service to their quest for power. Weaken the foundations of national identity and turn people against each other and cracks open in society that can be exploited. They don’t call it a demoralization campaign for nothing.
If it became convenient once again to embrace nationalism in their quest, they’d do that. Just accept it Winston: people, by and large, *want* to be slaves. All your rhetorical questions amount to nothing because the general ideology of liberty most of us on this site share is not respected or desired by the mass of humanity.
It’s not easy…
Well they already are. Going after the Confederates is nationalism. So is what is the Liberals are doing. We have certain values as Canadians and America, at least when Republicans are in charge, sucks.
Ass Wednesday continues!
http://archive.li/7RMMB
My god.
Also, curious what kind of pants 22 has on lol.
🙁
I ended up jinxing my sleep schedule. I ended up zonking out shortly after I was done with the remote work this afternoon and just woke up. So I’ll be off-schedule for the rest of the week at least.
Reread one of your own books? Kidding, but not really. Reading my own stuff puts me out quick.
I find my work entertaining, and reading has never put me to sleep.
You’re a good writer. Go ahead and read some of my posts in that case. Cringe yourself to sleep.
Bloomberg doing a 20 minute standup routine would be fantastic. Fight me.
I’m definitely for it. No way it wouldn’t end up in the ‘so bad its good’ territory.
Maybe if he’s standing in front of roomful of his employees.
Fighting you for 20 minutes would be better than a Bloomers stand-up routine.
Wow. Lord Digby brings the heat.
First!
You know who else…?
SP is awesome.
Thus concludes my attempts to not be culled.
SF’d the link – that’s a cullen’
No, this is a cullen.
Huh. Culled
Double-cullen’
Huh again. Culled
SP will be sending you a similar letter about your failure to link and with a promise to be culled.
That is hilarious.
It really is
That’s fantastic. Possibly even better than my current benchmark reply
LOL!
Damn. That is brilliant.
*snort*
That is a good one too.
That was WONDERFUL, Pontiff! Thank you!!!
Ah, my second birthday was a glorious occasion.
CDC Recommends Shaving Your Beard To Help Prevent Coronavirus
Soul patches, handlebar mustaches, and a Zorro-style mustache are OK so not all facial hair needs to go.
I was under the impression that masks did nothing to prevent contracting the virus, just (possibly) helped limit the spread of it.
Monday my doctor said the mask was useful in preventing you from touching your own mouth and introducing virus from your hands.
That, I’d believe – I have a terrible habit of touching my face. I’m really trying to get myself to stop it. I catch myself on videoconferences at work – it’s a bad look.
#metoo
A couple weeks ago I saw some medical type get interviewed who said masks weren’t all that effective. He said that wearing a pair of cotton gloves was much better.
According to this guy most transmission is from touching something that has the virus and then touching your eyes, nose or mouth. He said gloves wouldn’t pick up as many viruses and they also made you much more aware of trying to touch your face.
Don’t know how accurate that is, but at least you don’t look like a dork with a mask
The biggest problem with the mask is how people take it off after wearing one all day. The fucking thing captures are that crud all day on the outside of the mask and then people grab the front and pull it off, getting all those contaminants on their hands. It’s like licking your water filter after using it.
UCS, do you have an extra pair of Corona virus gloves?
I’ll have to check.
If that helped, china wouldn’t be having so much trouble.
Ba-dum
How do you figure? The Fu Manchu is the worst offender.
It’s not 1920 anymore. Not too many chinese rock that style these days.
That’s what they want you to think.
Beware the inscrutable Chinee!
Pai Mei would like a word.
-1 Eye
+5 point palm exploding heart technique
Pai Mei would just punch the fucking virus in it’s head and be done with it.
Say no to beard-os.
I was at a viewing tonight for an older cousin’s husband that passed. Small town, so a lot of his grandson’s (20-somethings) were there, too.
I was amazed at the beards, and fitted baseball hats. The latter worn indoors, in a funeral parlor.
Ugh.
I went to a viewing recently for my friend’s girlfriend. His side were all shirt, tie, etc. Her family were mostly dressed like slobs. It was not something anyone talked about or anything, just… weird.
I suspect they’re aping a look.
At the last “formal” work event, I was admiring what must have been some fellow’s dress-hoodies.
My dad has had a goatee since the ’60s. He took a ton of shit about it when he moved up to rural NW Minnesoda in the early ’70s. He didn’t complain, just kept the beard.
What killed him was when the hipsters all started wearing goatees too in the ’90s. All of a sudden he looked like some sad old poseur. He said he got way worse ribbing about being a hipster wannabee than he ever did when he was a borderline hippie.
Hipsters ruin everything they touch.
Amen. Exactly why I’ll never pay for another HJ from a hipster again.
Lemme guess, they chose their most tasteful fitted baseball hat.
What I want to know is what the dead guy would have thought.
Sorry.
Somehow we’ve managed through the swine flu, avian flu, SARS, and a batch of CDC-verified™ flu vaccines that didnt do shit for the past decade.
Why, in a planet of nearly 8 BN people, are were concerned if even 0.5 mil croak?
Not to sound callous, and its been posted here already- but more people die annually from the off-the-shelf, standard-issue, influenza, than this has caused.
For pants-shitting outbreak, see also: Zika Virus
I guess the thinking is that people think this one is more deadly than the flu – though it’s not proven yet.
Flu always takes out the young and the old; newborns and infirm. Despite being someone that got a$shed today, its natural selection.
I doubt you’re gonna read that “star Olympic athlete Xing Yang Putz died today from COVID-19 infection”
Not always
“It is believed that cytokine storms were responsible for the disproportionate number of healthy young adult deaths during the 1918 influenza pandemic, which killed 50 to 100 million people”
1918.
And that link fails to reference fatalities. At best the theory is causal and anecdotal.
It’s all speculation, since the phenomenon wasn’t even understood in 1918.
You made my point for me.
RIP one of my greatgrandfathers.
Fun fact: I am a strep carrrier, and haven’t had the flu since a child.
Y’all bring your coronavirus, and I’ll kick it’s ass, too.
Freaking Chinese- think they can just manufacture a virus and good, law abiding Americans will just put up with it? I don’t think so, commies!
You mean your immune system ?
TW- George Carlin (but its relevant)
That sickness I had a couple of weeks ago was actually Strep B. I’d been sick for a couple of weeks and didn’t know it and then I just felt OFF one day and went to urgent care.
No vaccine, no prior immunity in humans, high transmissibility, apparently transmissible while asymptomatic, possible aerosolized in certain conditions, higher mortality rate*, higher complication rate*
*the denominator of total infections is likely undercounted but to an unknown degree
Fuck off slavers.
Beardo confirmed.
Your envy is unflattering.
My vampire-like eternal boyish good looks prevent me from growing a proper beard (I think).
Just think about how much I save on razors.
{looks at Amish goatee in the mirror}
Fuck! I’m dead.
Well, something good came out of my ineptness I guess.
I was trimming up my winter beard last week and I managed to mangle it so badly that I ended up just shaving it off. Now, I guess I’ll stop telling the truth and tell everyone that I did it to stop the coronavirus
That’s misleading. That graphic is for people using respirators (which includes N95 masks), mainly in an occupational setting. The CDC is absolutely not recommending trimming beards and more so, they’re strongly recommending the general public to not wear masks outside of occupational requirements or if sick.
https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/hcp/guidance-prevent-spread.html
https://www.cdc.gov/flu/professionals/infectioncontrol/
So, today I learned that the Tuva Republic has a completely badass state anthem.
Meh…the last Hmong broad I banged was whistling that out her ass.
/miss me with that ish
Go on.
Its on pr0nhub. Im not enacting the labor for you.
FUCK OFF SLAVER!
I am Tuvan!
Does Xi want it back?
He may, but good luck getting it back from Putin.
“We’ve got mountains, snow and rivers.”
Wow. If Tuvan has rocks and grass, I know where I’m book my next vacation.
Nice. I’ll have to add that to my list of favorites that includes Russia and Azərbaycan.
For a while there, I was thinking Azerbaijan had Cream write their national anthem.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakutia
Yakutia forever!
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.cbc.ca/amp/1.5476537
I’m guessing Canada has no double-jeopardy protections?
*googles* Yeah, they’re weak – prosecution can appeal an acquittal.
Actually there is but it is only for “final acquittal” and since acquittals can be appealed…
You can join our Free Speech Union, but you need to agree to our values.
https://twitter.com/YouKipperLad/status/1232713043643191298
I could GAF about Tommy Robinson, but this is just silly logic. You aren’t a free speech union if you set those standards.
Hmmm.
https://twitter.com/YouKipperLad/status/1232713043643191298
Or did that get taken down right after I saw it?
Both links are not good.
Try this one.
https://twitter.com/Direthoughts/status/1232340623035895808
Neither link is good
oops
Whazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzup!?
We are wallowing in the glory of your fantabulous animation!
Had to sit through a lot of rally audio, but that bathroom line was a nugget worth sifting for.
Picking the ? out of the ? ?
Bingo
And duh, it was 2 lines. One where Trump was talking about how CNN will put a camera on an empty seat at a rally when someone has to go to the bathroom, and I forget the actual context of the rest of the sentence comes from, but my brain said right away those need to be spliced together.
Oh yeah, the “And I’m trying to act like it doesn’t hurt” he was talking about firm handshakes from graduating military cadets.
Not a ‘hearty’ handshake, though? And, no laurel, either?
Another excellent creation in the books. Good work!
Thanks!
I just threw together a ghetto chicken florentine….#DrunkChow
Just got home from work a bit ago, just getting the drinking started here.
Know that I have passed the glory of H&H on to other glibs–in the form of A VINYL STICKER!!!
Once my checks are regular again I’m gonna get high on my own supply and buy a few things for self I think.
Damn right.
Now, I gotta put the one I’m holding on to on my LL* (still have a spare).
*NCIC code for “carry-all”, or, SUV, to you normies
Mr Splosives announced that it was time for dessert and presented me with a surprise drink. It had banana slices decorating the rim of the glass, and in it was a milky chocolate-y looking thing. I drank it was was most pleased at the “banana split” sort of feel.
He then told me it was Bailey’s and Fireball.
The man has his faults, but he is gifted in mixology for damned sure.
It is the perfect…
…..AAAAAAAND that was a bridge too far for stodgy spouse. I started playing it, and he was all “What the shit is this? I’m out. Don’t talk to me.”
He doesn’t appreciate Danger 5 ?
Pfffffffffffffft.
Inorite?
Damn I gots to watch that again. That was funny as shit. Hitler is a real pill.
It is official, next week they’re moving me to 3rd shift. That will mean night shift here only on my days off. Gah!
Well, that, too, shall pass….unlike The Don’s issue.
Don’t worry, he has a poop knife.
Doesn’t everybody???
I’ve got a Gamma Knife
https://youtu.be/nC7ii3Ir-no
Please watch if you like Australia, rock n roll, the occult, and beer and weed and psychedelic rock. And vultures. And shitty 70’s flicks.
For those about to rock, we salute you!
I happened to be at the stoplight at the foot of the mountain to my house on the way home tonight. In the lane next to me, a couple of young bucks revved their giant Dodge truck engine and openly scoffed at my little tesla. I unrolled the windows and cranked up the Acca-Dacca that happened to be playing at the time.
They were really revving for a battle royale.
As soon as the light went green, I shot up that twisty windy 1000 foot rise at 70 mph without a sweat. The 4000 lb Tesla hugs tight as a drum and maneuvers like a dream. After a bit, I glanced in the rear view mirror and the dudes were puffing great clouds of diesel and not getting up that hill.
“Are you ready to die?”
Oh my.
(lolz)
I’ve got the weekend off then I switch. I think I’m just gonna stay up drinking all night Sunday night to shift my schedule. Maybe get some good liquor with the first paycheck.
what’s 3rd shift? Like, 3 AM to 10 or something? And time zone?
What, 10p-6a, 11p-7a? Something along those lines…
yeah, 10p-6a CT
3rd Shift Bros!
Yeah, but I’ll be on blackout 🙁
Bah–text while driving, dude. Totes safe.
I hate texting.
Send me a pigeon, then.
Oooh! Better yet–a Candy-gram!
I was expecting a plumber.
??????
Wait….this isn’t gonna be, like, ‘Red Dog Dry’, or some other secret Red Dog concoction, is it?
I’m thinking that maybe if I make really weak mixed drinks my stomach hopefully will let me have some Jameson. I love Whiskey, but my stomach now hates it. But maybe if I baby it I can enjoy some.
Get some good liquor with your first paycheck. You earned it, working man.
Working Man https://youtu.be/QovdVh5zH94
“I’ve got the weekend off then I switch. I think I’m just gonna stay up drinking all night Sunday night to shift my schedule. Maybe get some good liquor with the first paycheck.”
Alternatively, you could write something of interest and relevance to yourself to review at at later date. It does not necessarily have be a diary or journal as such is defined.
I do all my writing while drunk, so that is a distinction without a difference.
“I do all my writing while drunk, so that is a distinction without a difference.”
Even so, you could write something of interest and relevance to yourself to review at at later date. It does not necessarily have be a diary or journal as such is defined.
Speaking of Trump and India isn’t it interesting that Dalmia was complaining about how some Hindu nationalist desire to destroy the Taj Mahal even though it is a government monument to Mughal Imperialists who killed numerous Hindus? Not to mention those Chinese Emperors did some pretty nasty stuff. And it’s not like the people who built the stuff ISIS or the Taliban destroyed did not have a nasty history either.
How is Dalmia permanently stricken with PMS?
And how is she still employed by Reason? Is she “talented” in some ways we shouldn’t ask about?
Well she likes immigrants and hates Trump so…
Also the Taj Mahal was built not too long after the first slaves were imported to America and the Mughals were not overthrow until just before the American Civil War started,
Meditation nugget of the hour:
That dude sounds like he was LIT.
Jesus sounds like he’d have been an awesome dude to be around, even if you didn’t believe He was the son of God.
He liked to laugh, he tossed scammers out of the temple, befriended the “outcasts”. Lived his words. Liked a good joke too.
And was, by all accounts a skilled tradesman (Tekton), and a cook, too (Jn 21: 9-12).
“Worrying is like paying a debt you may never have owed in the first place.”
-some wise old Irishman
Pharisees: “So, are you claiming to be the Son of God?” (attempting to entrap Jesus into “blasphemy”)
Jesus of Nazareth: “You say that I am.”
Jesus of Nazareth, 2020 remake with Jeff Bridges: “Well, that’s just like, your opinion, man.”
No, this is Jesus 2020 in that universe.
And, the reviews are savage!
No Cohen Bros involvement, Tuturro having been in Transformers (not animated) movies, Susan Surandan; lots of red flags.
In-f’ing-deed.
Well, I got my Scottish Lord paperwork today. I guess I’m
AKCSKC registered, now. Those Celts are gonna love them some Lone Star Digby!WOO HOO–Spring Break 2020 British Isles!!!
Also got the next Night Shift post submitted, for any PTB who are active….
I dub thee Sir Loin of Steak!
Oh, wait– you are already Sir Digby.
Very well. Carry on. (Straightens crown.)
“Carry on“, eh?
That opened with an ad for cookware, and I was thinking, WTF is he sending me a link about cookware?
Then the actual video opened.
WTF?? You running an ad blocker, young lady?? ‘Cause, you oughtta be.
I do have ad blocker (brought to you by the finest Russian Kaspersky spyware) but it is powerless against Youtubery.
On chrome based browsers there is a ‘screw youtube ads’ plugin that works great.
Thks for the tip, dude!
Just the tip, I promise.
Wait….that IS what she said!
I’m always truth adjacent, even in my jokes.
Are you Mickey Mouse?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WiZ8D9akdV4
Animal video for Digby.
Dude….are you saying I’m Wil Wheaton??
Oh–a terrier. I suppose so.
Did you see the video title?
Of course I did! Did you read the description?
I know how you
SovietRusskie bots work…subtly trying to imply I’m a shitty former child “actor”, by using an amusing pup video.I know ALL about it…
I, Sir, am not a bot! I’m simple troll farmer. Organic troll farm, just like my grandpappy did.
Good dog! (and yes, I spot the pun)
“Socialism works in only two places: Heaven, where they don’t need it, and Hell, where they already have it.”
–Ronald Reagan
Love it!
The saying, not…you know.
“I have to go to the bathroom, but I’m trying to pretend it doesn’t hurt!”
-Donald J. Trump (as edited by a drunk cartoonist)
Oh how Orange Man has damaged the office!
Well, the throne looks sturdy enough.
Two avitar changes in the last like 20 minutes? Are you trying to transition? What are your preferred pronouns?
Two?? Nope–just this one.
I mean it might be the same picture, but there was kilt before.
OK, now it’s 2 changes.
I don’t think I’ve ventured into kilt territory before now… You, uh, “having some libations”, are ya?
Maybe the NSA is screwing with me, I swear there was an avitar of this type when I posted that comment.
Another good one CP, thanks.
So I got to talking politics with a regular customer who I see several times a year for a job. I generally avoid that topic unless the person really stays on the subject, and even then sometimes not. He got a visa to come here in 1983 from Nicaragua. He saw the Marxist shitshow that was about to go down a couple years before when he was in his early 20’s. His friends and some of his relatives told him that he shouldn’t take off and that the revolution was going to be a positive. A couple years later they were begging him to get them out. “Damn K, I can’t believe people are falling for that same shit here. This is the only country left. Where else are we supposed to go? It’s easy to see why you can’t have socialism; it’s puro propaganda and they are very good at it, but come on man. This isn’t that hard to figure out.”
Esse si que es mi amigo.
Put him on TV.
If people won’t listen to her, he’s got no chance. I mean, she has certain, um, assets.
I like how there is a Bloomberg ad before that video. That man is dropping some serious coin. It’s all about Bernie though. I hadn’t thought he would get the nomination before, but it really is a chance he will. I’m hoping that he will as then the choice is laid out. The Dems will be staking their rep on an avowed socialist, which will in all hope, get resoundedly denied. And Glibs.tv will call for four more years of the Hat and the Hair.
It shows the narcissism inherent in people, but, especially in many younger Americans–“Oh, it’ll work this time, because I’m gonna be there, making changes, and I’m the smartest person I know!!”
Oh, even if he loses, I can stretch it out for a bit with both the Hat and Hair berating him as he sits in a wife beater and boxers in Trump Tower, as long as he continues to give speeches. And maybe Bernie’s dentures talk to him or something, I’ll let SF cook that gag up. As long as I’m not put in cattle car (or get bored or too busy), I’ll try to keep the cartoons going.
You are about to hit the goldmine of material. This election should provide a massive amount of hilarious audio.
KSue speak much truth!
The fellow is highly well spoken and telegenic. He really hates the communism, I’d love to see him on tv. Glib en espanol.
Damn–I guess there are those for whom nothing is sacred.
I don’t care about opinions over beer–it’s still one of man’s greatest inventions, and usually makes people happy.
Heard about that on the way home from work. Even more appalling is that it’s Molsen-Coors. It’s fucking Miller Valley you vultures!
I wonder how Rick Astley gets through Lent?
Is this gonna end in a RickRoll?
You saw this, didn’t you?
No but it’s awesome!
Heh, one of the things from work I can talk about is our random discussions. My supervisor I think is a bit younger than me, and the other guys I was working with are EARLY 20s. Somehow Rick-Rolling got brought up, my supervisor said he didn’t mind it because he likes the song, I said it wasn’t as bad as two girls one cup. Glad that one went away.
Hah! Sounds like a semi-decent supervisor, at least.
Yeah, new supervisor next week. I like this guy. Hopefully what the department head told me is true and a new hire will come along soon and they’ll stick him on 3rd shift. Although, the shift changes keep changing my days off. One of the things I was looking forward to was a more stable schedule. And schedules, like other documents can’t leave our workspace, so I have to keep writing myself notes.
Based on what I know and what you’ve told me (you’ll be more aware overall), they probably do favor seniority, as in, it getting more say in scheduling and the like. Of course, you have to actually put in the time to get it. But, if that is correct, perseverance tends to pay off.
Also, I had questions about what is available to you for retirement. If you’re keen to, we can talk in
smoke signalsemails.401K package, different levels of aggressiveness or direct portfolio choice. I went mildly aggressive. I’m at least a decade behind my age cohort in that arena, so try to build a bit fast and then slow down.
Huh….I have some follow-up questions I’ll ask about in those smoke signals.
Later on–not nec. tonight.
Yup–nothing sacred.
Up to five years–too light, or, too harsh? Discuss.
In a better run system she would be paying him half of her earnings for the next decade to offset what she did and not going in a cage unless she didn’t do that. But since paying the crime victim back is not a priority, she deserves a few years for sure. Give her 8 months for good behavior.
You know, the idea of double dipping (civil & criminal) maybe should come into play here. Really, her charge/conviction is really more about lying to the government than it is about harming him. Yeah, it’s both, but, technically it’s about lying/filing a false report.
That charge/crime is an interesting discussion in and of itself, but, until it goes away, he should get $ from her (like you said) to offset. If she trashes your rep, you get a check.
That window is getting into hotdog in a hallway territory.
Excellent! I completely missed that.
Gah!!!! Was he a soldier or a sailor.
And you’ll kill me if it ends up that he was a marine.
Don’t be silly.
Clearly he was air force.
OK–which of my fellow glibs participated in this? https://hotair.com/headlines/archives/2020/02/science-drive-expensive-car-youre-probably-jerk/
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/feb/24/immigrants-britain-conservative-priti-patel-sajid-javid
Well there a spot at the Gauradina for Dalmia
“Child of a child molester disavows child molestation, news at ten”
Right?? Maybe these kid aren’t quite so happy with the UK the ‘parents built’. And, even if they are, doesn’t make it right, Nesrine Machiavelli.
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/feb/26/consent-forms-rape-harvey-weinstein
I guess I have to play this now in prep for next week.
This is even more appropriate for around here.
Old Man music…
OK, zoomer…
If he thinks that’s old, maybe the meme about is mom isn’t wrong.
I made that Change.org petition to make Trump force Adult Swim air Hat and Hair, so now they send me random petitions, this is the one I got today:
This is why we can’t have nice things!
Wow, I can’t believe we haven’t caught on to the FACT that all people in porn were made to do so against their individual will! As soon as porn goes away, no more ‘sex trafficking’!
Also, I do think the phrase should be ‘sex traffricking’
Until it’s TrafFUCKING, the PR has failed.
NOW you’re Texing it up, my man!
Is this a socon or a feminist?
When all is said and done, does it matter?
If a feminist falls down in the woods and there’s no one to hear it, is she still ugly?
Trick question: Feminists don’t fall–they are pushed down by the Patriarchy
Well, I can’t argue with that logic. I’m just a girl.
Tee Hee! ?
Dang–coulda used ?
Alt-right, gonna watch a documentary on swords. Night. Thanks for watching. Stay tuned for words from our sponsor. the Letter x.
Peace out, you.
*hayek takes night medications, sets alarm, gets in bed.
Dead silence and peace.
Hayek turns on electric heating pad on hip.
Cat detects heat source from 80 yards away, awakens, jumps into bed on Hayeksplosives’ hip.
Cats are freaking scary predators.
Aww…Mom’s Li’l Predator!
All I really want to do is go back to bed. But I have to get ready to go to work.
I can’t remember where I stashed my umbrella, and it’s raining.
I found the umbrella, made it to work, now I have to fill out paperwork.
I have an Umbrella Corp umbrella. It’s quite stylish.
Does it protect from viral agents? Might come in hany in the near future.
Not that I’m aware of. ?
Oh good….
Staaaars.
18 year old swallows…should be a link to pornhub, but it’s not…
https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2020/02/26/Pet-snake-swallows-an-entire-beach-towel/5311582739787/?sl=5
Damn snake messed up its references. Towels are for Douglas Adams references, not Monty Pythons.
Maybe someone has an idea – or debating random silliness might give me an idea, but I’m trying to figure out how to add tension to a story when the setting itself sort of deflates the stakes.
The main character gets his hands on a portable door, which always leads back to the same place no matter where it’s moved to. (There are a few other rules, but they don’t come into play) That place is part of a manor in an abandoned dwarf city that sealed its doors during the collapse of the empire. As such, the residents ended up starving, resorting to cannibalism, and dying out. This left a lot of them to rise as revenants and wander the streets.
The story I want to write involves the narrator clearing out a foothold around the portable door out to a specific barricaded perimeter so they can use it as a base for things they do in the part of the world they’re normally in.
The problem is, the fact that they can simply retreat through the portable door at any time and once again be safe makes it hard to ratchet up the tension. All they lose is the use of the neato portable base.
Can there be (at least) one revenant left in the manor, perhaps lurking there so that they may or may not have to confront it if they retreat through the door?
If they retreat through the door, they’ve left the manor and are a few thousand miles away from the revenants. It’s possible for some to get between them and the door, which may happen because someone goes “if we get in trouble we just run back out.” Probably the narrator, since it’s his door.
Can the ‘threat’ follow them back through the door? If they had to keep the doors location secret it may not always be safe to retreat.
No. In fact, anyone not with the guy with the key can’t use the door at all. Meaning if they split up or get separated, the party without the key is stuck.
Seems ripe for tension, separation as you mention or the Key is lost/stolen/breaks etc…
The door leads back to that pitiful dwarf city? Why would anyone want to go back there?
Simple. No matter how much stuff you store in the city, the door still weighs exactly the same. That’s a lot of cargo capacity. Besides, when cleaned up, the manor is a nice house, so when you’re in the ass end of nowhere, you still have access to some of the comforts of home… just ignore the shuffling and moaning outside the barricades.
“ just ignore the shuffling and moaning outside the barricades.”
Just let them eat cake, eh?
These undead don’t have any pretense of philosophy or semantics, they just try to kill you.
I suppose the best approach would be early overconfidence. They acknowledge “We have this easy escape route, it won’t be hard to get away” and then explore too far and get cut off from said escape.
Are there some new crying Jordan memes from the Kobe memorial thing?
PM Abe just announced that all schools elementary to HS are recommended to close for the next month due to corona. My kid is ecstatic.
Will there be some sort of remote learning/virtual classroom style setup instead?
Doesn’t look like it. Just extra vacay for the kids.
Here.
https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2020/02/27/national/hokkaido-coronavirus-school/#.Xle3EyWRWEc
That doesn’t make much sense, from what I’ve heardit’s mostly elderly or inform being infected, with kids strangely not getting it often.
Can kids spread it, seems reasonable with an infectious disease, close down places where dirty people may contact the clean.
Children are being infected. Mortality & complications requiring hospital care is weighted towards the higher risk groups (elderly or other risk factors), but is not limited to those groups.
Maybe that’s what it was. sounds perfect to me, How else will we ever reduce entitlement spending?
But leave the after school clubs open!
(Which kind of defeats the whole purpose for closure)
Those places are germ factories.
They’re more like germ exchanges.
and day cares.
anyone who has put their kid in one knows it’s only a matter of if not when for sicknesses.
if not whenwhen not if… fuck.
Ugh. It’s not even 5 AM but my work phone is already beeping the email chime.
Time to make the donuts….
But I already made the donuts!