Tuesday Afternoon Links

by | Feb 18, 2020 | Daily Links | 305 comments

Fun article below me where we can prove robc’s old aphorism: Slightly more flavors of libertarianism than libertarians.

Its fun to fantasize about a utopian state where we are left alone just enough. I am definitely NOT left alone just enough right now, although The State is falling way behind The Wife, The Children, and The Boss on people preventing me from doing as I would. Although it will probably be warm enough by March to abandon pants at the office. Gotta dig out the taint towel and get it ready for bidness

Why does everyone look nervous here?

.

Today in school is no different from prison, guard (sorry, behavioral interventionist — no shit — probably has dozens of hours of specialized training) fractures skull of 12 year-old while restraining the boy to put him in the “Room of Opportunity”. Next up, another Floridaman tradition: “boy, what’s your dirt in the bosses’ ditch?”

How come all of these racist and sexist patients have expensive to treat conditions?

“Shut up and take my money!” Just kidding, I need to win the lottery first. And then when I come back to work a month later, people will shake their heads and mutter, “Floridaman”.

Bottom story of the day. JEB! wishes people weren’t so gosh-darned mean to each other.

 

I think

for music today.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

305 Comments

  1. Gustave Lytton

    They’ve taken the Hypocritic Oath.

  2. Swiss Servator

    For music today…. the sound of silence?

  3. Q Continuum

    “The NHS will soon bar discriminatory patients from non-critical care”

    One more step toward cleansing the nation of enemies of the people comrade!

    • Private Chipperbot

      Do they not have the hippopotamus oath there?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Yeah, they don’t give fatasses any care either.

    • ZARDOZ

      ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN COMMENTING ONE. NEEDLESS TO SAY, IF IT RESULTS IN CLEANSING, ZARDOZ IS IN FAVOR OF IT. ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.

    • RAHeinlein

      “Currently, staff can refuse to treat non-critical patients who are verbally aggressive or physically violent towards them.”

      No complaints allowed!

      • Q Continuum

        “verbally aggressive or physically violent towards them”

        We looked at his browser history and he watched some Jordan Peterson videos. This is obviously violence so we chucked him out on the street.

      • Naptown Bill

        I’ve been listening to Michael Malice’s podcast while I jog or drive, and I heard an interview he did with this leftist professor from Canada named Heidi Matthews. Aside from a couple of decent points she’s pretty much why academics have such a shit reputation among some circles. She’s her own stereotype. Anyway, one of the seizure-inducing eyerolls I suffered was when she referred to the heckling of the audience a drag queen was doing during a drag show she was attending as “violent”. Like, not that she felt violence was about to happen, not that the person was becoming physically violent, THE SPEECH ITSELF WAS VIOLENT.

        I admire that Malice seems to be willing to engage anyone willing to discuss ideas, no matter what they are, but I couldn’t pretend to take anything anyone said seriously after they said some shit like that. I wish he’d called her out on it.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        His interview with the Babylon Bee was pretty funny,

      • Chipwooder

        A football board I post at has had a lengthy, largely pointless argument lately over whether “the pussification of America” is a real thing. While I largely agree with those who say it’s a silly concept that is largely overblown, and emblematic of the typical generational conflict you find throughout history, what you mention here is the one thing I do think is legitimately happening. This ridiculous notion that “I don’t feel safe because of someone else’s words” is taken seriously at many, if not most, colleges these days and it’s become a go-to tactic to silence people and drive them off-campus.

      • Ted S.

        And the silencing of wrong-thinkers, often involving actual physical violence, is somehow not violence at all, no sirree.

    • Tonio

      But it’s a human rights violation if someone doesn’t bake a cake for a same sex wedding.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Rightthinkers can never be subservient to wrongthinkers . Wrongthinkers must always be subservient to Rightthinkers.

      • Chipwooder

        Remember – police in the UK spend large amounts of time tracking down people who write bad things on Twitter and threatening them with jail time.

    • UnCivilServant

      They could take the strain off of the NHS by allowing private hospitals without harassment by authorities.

      • JD is Unemployed

        There is private healthcare here also. Some folks choose partial cover which means that if the NHS can’t see them/begin treatment within a certain timeframe, they are covered for treatment privately.

      • UnCivilServant

        How much of a hassle is it to set up a private hospital?

      • JD is Unemployed

        I dunno. I’ve never tried.

    • AlexinCT

      This shit is the biggest boon that the left sees from government controlled healthcare: the ability to kill off those critical of or opposed to their evil shit by denying them treatment. But hey, it’s the private sector that is evil….

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Humans can be so vile,
      Farewell Albion!

    • Enough About Palin

      “Free speech for me; death for ye.”

  4. robc

    I guess Tourette’s is no longer being treated in the UK. Good thing Tim Howard is back in the US.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Oogadyboogadyboogadyblarp thank you, doctor. Fuck bastard but shit cunt do you have any cunt medication for fuck off this vagina fart condition?

      I’ll scissor me timbers, you sexy dyke, see myself out fuck.

  5. Tundra

    I think

    for music today.

    I’ve got it.

  6. Q Continuum

    “our top priority is the safety of our kids”

    How can they say this shit with a straight face? They just gave a 12 year-old life threatening injuries.

    • Tonio

      Their shit don’t stank, Q. They are the state. If the state says there are three apples on the table, then there are three apples on the table.

      • JD is Unemployed

        There are four lights!

  7. Gustave Lytton

    J https://youtu.be/vtHYZkLuKcI

    Japan is fucked, and about to get fucked even harder in a few hours when they start disembarking potential carriers from the Wuhan Princess.

    • Q Continuum

      Needs moar tentaclez.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        The coronas are nothing but tentacles on a microscopic scale.

    • Tonio

      Are they going to release those passengers into the general population, or quarantine them?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        30 days on Quarantine Island,

      • C. Anacreon

        And on each episode one person will be ‘voted off’ the island (i.e. incinerated).

      • Gustave Lytton

        Release into general population without restriction.

        https://mainichi.jp/english/articles/20200218/p2g/00m/0na/073000c

        They do have to test negative but without knowing their last exposure, it’s a crapshoot. There’s also been a number of failures to detect Coronavirus using throat swabs because the viral load may not be high enough at the swab site.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That just sounds like a surrender.

    • grrizzly

      I’m reading it while making a transfer at Yokohama station. LOL.

  8. Rebel Scum

    “Far too often I hear stories that the people you are trying to help lash out. I’ve seen it for myself in A&Es, on night shifts, and on ambulances.”

    Screw the people that are sick/injured. All that matters is the NHS worker’s feelz.

    • Tulip

      Right, because there are no injuries or illnesses that could cause people to lash out. Assholes

      • C. Anacreon

        Bingo! One thing we are always trying to teach emergency staff is what they might perceive as threats, harassment or aggression is often merely the symptoms of the patient’s illness, and you can help make it better, but not by being hostile in return.

        You’d never say “stop having chest pain!” to a cardiac patient, but saying “stop being so loud!” is basically doing the same thing to someone in delirium.

      • Spudalicious

        The louder they got, the quieter I got. They had to calm down to hear what I was saying.

      • C. Anacreon

        Exactly. The core tenet of de-escalation is ‘don’t be agitated back to someone.’

        If you respond to someone who’s yelling at you with a whisper, soon afterwards you’re typically both whispering, not both yelling.

      • Spudalicious

        It really works well with agitated dementia patients.

    • Private Chipperbot

      This guy’s spurting blood all over me. Get him out of here!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It’s the best argument against nationalized healthcare I’ve ever seen.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      As long as they only lash out verbally they should let it slide. People who are in the hospital or even just at the doc’s office are under a lot of stress.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Humans who are sick, hurt, and or confused lash out like wounded animals. Who knew>

    • RAHeinlein

      And then there’s this gem near the end of the article – shocked face:

      “A separate survey published by the Parliamentary and Health Service Ombudsman found that one in five mental health patients do not feel safe in NHS care.”

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        That’s because the NHS is run by aliens.

      • UnCivilServant

        That guy managed to make a whole career out of that… so good on him.

  9. Chipwooder

    JEB! wishes people weren’t so gosh-darned mean to each other.

    Please clap.

    • Q Continuum

      Female presenting transgender gay male?

    • Gadfly

      Attention whore?

      • AlexinCT

        ^^^THIS^^^

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It sounds like something an attention starved middle-schooler would say.

        “I’M SPECIAL BECAUSE MY HAIR IS BLUE AND I GET MY JOLLIES IN THIS VERY UNUSUAL WAY THAT NOBODY ELSE DOES AND I’M A VICTIM TOO. DID I MENTION I’M SPECIAL?”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Though Dawson has not shared how she identifies, she added, “I’ve never had a relationship in that space, so it’s never felt like an authentic calling to me.”

      This is what brainwashing looks like.

      • Mad Scientist

        I’ve never had a relationship with a Ferrari either, but the yearning sure feels authentic.

      • Chipwooder

        So….she’s not actually gay, just a famewhore looking to gain a little extra SJW cred. Got it.

    • Enough About Palin

      “happy pride month! sending love to my fellow lgbtq+ homies. ”

      I’m thinking she identifies as a plus sign.

      • Shirley Knott

        “Isn’t that special?” /church lady

  10. Rebel Scum

    Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation to free the slaves. “Lincoln did what he thought was right even though it wasn’t popular,”

    That would be news to the enslaved people in areas that were under US control at the time considering it did not apply to them.

    “Don’t we all have friends that are crazy politically?” he asked. “But you have a brother or a sister that’s different than you ideologically, and you still love ’em right? So why can’t we translate that to a broader context?”

    Please be civil.

    • UnCivilServant

      Please be civil.

      Whycome you hate me?

    • Q Continuum

      I dunno, my sibling isn’t actively trying to enslave me at the point of a gun?

      • C. Anacreon

        Fuck off sibling slaver.

    • Chipwooder

      Makes me think of an amusing comment a gay acquaintance once uttered – “I’m not sure why liking dick means that I have to like Madonna and showtunes”

      • AlexinCT

        Heh, I have heard others say something like that off and on, and they usually are close to having their gay card confiscated for daring to even think that…

      • Chipwooder

        This guy kind of defied the usual stereotypes – wasn’t into art or fashion at all, wore ragged jeans and t-shirts most of the time, big sports fan, drove an old pickup truck, liked hard rock, went fishing all the time. He just was attracted to men instead of women. Having grown up in one of the last generations when hating homosexuals was entirely socially acceptable, even obligatory, knowing him was kind of a turning point for me. There wasn’t anything “other” about this guy other than who he had sex with. Once you can break down that mental wall, it becomes much easier to start realizing that sexual preference really doesn’t have any deeper meaning and it’s just another variation on the human condition. At that point, you become much better at accepting people for who they are.

      • Gadfly

        This guy kind of defied the usual stereotypes

        The stereotypes exist because the people who couldn’t (or wouldn’t) blend in were the ones identifiable to everyone else, and thereby set the type in people’s minds.

      • Chipwooder

        I never thought about it that way, but it makes sense.

      • Shirley Knott

        There is also the effect where those hated and shunned for appearing, and thus being, homosexual, can strike back by adopting ever more ‘transgressive’ poses. It becomes a giant ‘fuck you!’ to live the extremes. See Divine, for example. Or Waylon and Madame. No shortage of examples.
        It became toxic when ‘over the top’ replaced ‘fuck you.’ And we won, which left all the infrastructure of the battle in place, ready to be used for transgressing.

    • Rhywun

      I wouldn’t put too much stock in the blatherings of the “activist” wing of any group.

      • Tonio

        But even the moderate gays tend to go along, or at least STFU, about the radical agenda. To do otherwise is to be a traitor, a self-loather, an enabler of ‘phobias.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, there should be more push-back but it’s not like the media are going to publicize it anyway.

      • Mad Scientist

        Once the group has subsumed you, you must lose all individuality and work only to further the interests of the group, even if those interests conflict with yours. Otherwise, you risk being kicked out. And that’s, like, totes grody.

      • JD is Unemployed

        89 minute read? Yowzer! Barbara, clear my schedule for tomorrow morning.

      • Tonio

        The Quillette article is spot-on. Thanks.

        The comments, though, are a seemingly unconscious self-parody of the author’s most valid critiques of conservatives.

        *cough* snowconez *cough*

      • JD is Unemployed

        I don’t dip into the comments on Quillette but I guess it’s a pretty broad church.

    • Mojeaux

      The window has moved.

      Gay men are the white men of white men.

  11. ChipsnSalsa

    You know who didn’t get a ‘taint towel?

    • Spudalicious

      Stormy Daniels?

  12. gbob

    About fifteen years ago I was teaching at a school that specialized for teenagers who were classified as being emotionally disturbed. Part of our TCI training involved “therapeutic holds”. Obviously this teacher is an asshole, but when you’re in an environment where you’re trained to take down and restrain kids every other day, it’s pretty easy to see how you could really accidentally hurt the kid in the process.

    • Private Chipperbot

      We call those ‘Lennie hugs”…

  13. leon

    Why should my tax dollars be spent to help those piece of shit crackers who can’t come up to modernity? Good on the NHS for putting its boot down and saying enough is enough. Racism is wrong, and it shouldn’t be tolerated by anyone.

    • Q Continuum

      Ammo is cheap and think of all the cost we could save if we approached the problem more, shall we say, proactively.

      • leon

        Your not thinking economically enough. Ammo may be cheap, but think of all the labor that would be squandered…

      • UnCivilServant

        *shoots Q and Leon*

        Problem solved.

      • Sean

        Well, that escalated quickly.

      • UnCivilServant

        It was Q’s suggestion.

    • Q Continuum

      “Stop going places just to get a reaction, you got a reaction.”

      She shouldn’t have worn that skirt, she was asking for it!

      • Fatty Bolger

        How dare she exercise her rights right out in public like that. Disgusting!

    • Ted S.

      And this goes with Naptown Bill’s post about Michael Malice above.

  14. Rebel Scum

    1620 Project

    Plymouth Rock and several other landmarks in the Massachusetts town were vandalized ahead of the 400th anniversary of Pilgrims arriving at the site on the Mayflower.

    Crews cleaned up the rock and other landmarks late Monday morning and Plymouth town manager Melissa Arrighi said police are investigating the incident.

    “We are saddened and sickened by the recent vandalism in our historic town,” she wrote.

    Plymouth Rock, a seashell-shaped sign celebrating the 400th anniversary, the Pilgrim Maiden statue and the National Monument to the Forefathers were among the monuments that were sprayed with red paint.

    Photos of the rock showed “508” and “MOF” painted over Plymouth Rock’s “1620 inscription.

    • Chipwooder

      the hell is 508 and MOF supposed to mean?

      • Rhywun

        508 appears to be the area code there. Gangbangers?

      • Grummun

        614 740 220 represent!

      • C. Anacreon

        The year 1620 the Pilgrims came over.

        The good ship Mayflower brought them o’er the sea.

        They landed at Plymouth Rock, then built up their houses.

        Those MOF’s started 508 for thee.

  15. Gadfly

    Today in school is no different from prison, guard (sorry, behavioral interventionist — no shit — probably has dozens of hours of specialized training) fractures skull of 12 year-old while restraining the boy to put him in the “Room of Opportunity”.

    Maybe they should just bring back the birch. I don’t think anyone every got a skull fracture from that.

  16. Enough About Palin

    “Today in school is no different from prison, guard (sorry, behavioral interventionist — no shit — probably has dozens of hours of specialized training) fractures skull of 12 year-old while restraining the boy to put him in the “Room of Opportunity”.”

    My G-d, it’s supposed to get up to 82 degrees there tomorrow. Here in Minneapolis, I’ll be waking up to seven below zero. I gotta get the fuck out.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      I’ll trade.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I don’t believe you.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I lived in Syracuse. We got 250 inches of snow one winter. I liked it there.

        I *hate* the constant heat.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Sounds like unnecessary shoveling and wearing too many layers.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      We barely made 67 in BhC, Trade ya

  17. Rebel Scum

    That’s not how it works.

    “What about though, the fact that the president seems liberated … he was acquitted, his poll ratings are higher,” CNN’s Christiane Amanpour said before being interrupted by Pelosi.

    “He was not, there was no acquittal,” Pelosi falsely claimed. “You can’t have an acquittal unless you have a trial, and you can’t have a trail when you have witnesses and documents.”

    “So he can say he’s acquitted, and the headlines can say ‘acquitted,’ but he’s impeached forever, branded with that and not vindicated,” Pelosi continued.

    Later in the interview, Pelosi said, “I can’t even envision a situation where he would be re-elected, but we don’t take anything for granted. … but everybody knows that we must be unified in making sure that he does not have a second term.”

    Pelosi continued, “Our country is great, the American people are wonderful, we’re a resilient country, we can withstand one term, but the destruction that he would do to the courts of our country and the environment … he must be defeated.”

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Putting people on the courts who may restrict government power more than they restrict the people’s liberty is destruction. Got it.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      I really, really underestimated the stupidity of Team Blue going into Trump’s presidency.

      • UnCivilServant

        They probably could have gotten any number of concessions if they’d pretended to deal.

      • Chipwooder

        Outstupiding the Stupid Party is quite an accomplishment, really.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And Pelosi’s family is forever stained with Mafia corruption.

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      And then she called him fat and ugly and said nobody likes him.

      The more I hear from politicians, the more I think that Washington DC is just like high school. Maybe Hollywood could do a remake of The Breakfast Club but with politicians. Nancy could take the place of Molly Ringworm. Trump would probably be Emilio Estevez. Bernie could be Judd Whatsisname. Klobuchar would be the weird girl eating salad with her comb. Bloomberg would be the nerd. Joe could be the janitor.

      • C. Anacreon

        The guy who played the janitor in the original movie was one of the stars of the early 80’s Chicago Second City troupe. We lived near their theater, and used to go all the time to the free shows at midnight on weekends, when they’d try out new material, and he was always hilarious and engaging. He seemed destined to be the next Chevy Chase. But it looks like the janitor in the Breakfast Club ended up being the pinnacle of his screen career.

    • Q Continuum

      “we can withstand one term, but the destruction that he would do to the courts of our country and the environment … he must be defeated”

      LOL. Go have another Chardonnay and take a nap Nancy.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        She’s sounding desperate now. Something tells me Barr is getting too close to home.

    • leon

      “He was not, there was no acquittal,” Pelosi falsely claimed. “You can’t have an acquittal unless you have a trial, and you can’t have a trail when you have witnesses and documents.”

      You know if Pelosi spent the same amount of time reading the constiution as she does pretending to care about it, she wouldn’t say such stupid shit.

      She’d still be a piece of shit, because reading the constitution isn’t gonna stop a tyrant, but at least she wouldn’t look like a fool. (as much)

    • JD is Unemployed

      Overall I’m going with 18. She looks like she’s got some chutzpah.

  18. UnCivilServant

    The commentary on aliens reminded me – My dad and I are stopping in Roswell on our way to Flagstaff, and we’re looking for a good ghost town along the general axis of that leg of the trip. Anyone know of any?

    • Q Continuum

      Ft. Sumner isn’t a ghost town but it is where Billy the Kid is buried.

      • Chipwooder

        They have a cool little museum there. I drove a bit out of my way to visit back when I moved out to LA long ago.

    • Mad Scientist

      Stop by any KMart.

      • UnCivilServant

        I suspect he wants to see 19th century era structures.

      • C. Anacreon

        In the 19th Century they called K-Marts “general stores”.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      No wrongthinkers allowed

    • Q Continuum

      Planned Parenthood hosts panel on personhood and pro-life policy.

      • Tonio

        Chaired by Peter Singer.

    • leon

      Well duh. They hold a view of the 2A that is clearly not what it is supposed to be. We shouldn’t give a platform to charlatans. We can’t trust the people to hear two sides of an argument and make decisions about it. That would threaten democracy.

      • Q Continuum

        Words are violence, Nazis don’t get a platform, hate speech isn’t free speech, etc. etc. etc.

      • Gadfly

        hate speech isn’t free speech

        That one really gets under my skin. Probably because it’s the closest to “up is down” that I’ve ever heard any sane person say in seriousness.

  19. Tundra

    Q’s kitty article in the last thread got me thinking about self defense against dogs. Recently, I was out walking on the trails by my house when three dogs came cruising around the corner and two of them started freaking out at me. I wasn’t terribly concerned as they were Goldens with collars, so it was likely just an irresponsible shithead owner walking them off lead.

    I backed up slowly and after a few minutes they took off. I didn’t have a pistol on me, just my folder.

    I have a ton of experience with large breeds, but I’m not naive enough to think that’s enough. I mean, Suthen got chewed up pretty good recently and I had to get a tetanus shot and stitches after another Golden attacked my dog (his fucking owner: “He’s never done that before!” Fuck you, lady, put your dog on a leash.)

    Anyone have recommendations for effective deterrents for multiple dogs? I’d rather not use a walking stick. Collapsable baton? Pepper spray?

    • Q Continuum

      Outside of a gun, I guess I’d say bear spray?

      • Enough About Palin

        Bear spray came to my mind as well.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Multiple dogs?

      Climb a tree.

      A very loud noise might buy you some time though. I think there’s a product out there called Dog Horn (basically an air horn).

    • Certified Public Asshat

      What is wrong with Golden Retrievers in MN?

      My wife carries pepper spray on her when she walks the dog. Not for people (although obviously it could be) but for other asshole dogs.

    • Tonio

      Pepper spray. But do be careful because it’s easy to get the stuff on yourself afterwards.

      • Tundra

        Yeah, I’ve carried bear spray many times. Maybe spray is the way to go.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Just be sure to spray the owner when you are done with the dog.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Aluminum Baseball bat

    • Sean

      Nunchucks.

      Duh.

      • UnCivilServant

        How many nuns could a nunchuck chuck if a nunchuck could chuck nuns?

      • Spudalicious

        42.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Claymore mines work well for multiple distributed targets.

    • Enough About Palin

      Vice President Joe Biden tells America to “Buy a shotgun, buy a shotgun”

    • Gustave Lytton

      Halt! Dog repellent. It’s what USPS and utilities use. USPS also uses Back Off dog repellent.

      It’s pepper spray.

    • Mad Scientist

      Dogs are, usually, more about bluster. But on those occasions when they’re not kidding, I’m not sure pepper spray is going to stop them.

      • Tundra

        Yep. I’ve been through it many times.

        Just something I’ve been thinking about.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      Pepper spray or a baton is solid for a single dog but isn’t going to stop multiple large dogs. I would act aggressive and do my best to make the pack rethink their assessment of me as a harmless target. Same as for any predator.

      If the pack attacks anyway, you’re past the deterrent stage and need to put them down before they put you down. Pepper spray or a stick isn’t going to do that.

    • Chipwooder

      Aggressive golden retrievers exist? Amazing.

      I only have a little wirehaired dachshund, but I always maintain control of her in public because she can be a cranky little shit when she doesn’t want to be bothered by strange people or dogs. I have never understood why people don’t do that without exceptions. All dogs are animals that can react under the wrong circumstances. Just keep them on the leash, it’s not difficult.

      Bear spray would seem to be the way to go. If it can deter a bear, it seems logical that it would have to deter a dog.

    • straffinrun

      Korean neighbors.

      • Spudalicious

        Larf.

    • Mojeaux

      We covered dog attacks in karate. The one and only time I was ever threatened (by a chow-chow) (I hate those dogs so, so much) I had no weapons (except my empty hands har har). I was half scared to death and half running through all the what-ifs in my mind. In the meantime, I stared the fucker down. I knew I was going to get hurt and I was prepared for that. I was also prepared to kill it or die trying. It backed down, tail between legs and everything.

    • pistoffnick

      My wife’s Golden (I claim no responsibility) will charge full barrel at strangers only to somersault at their feet so they can better rub her belly.

      She is always on a leash except for when in the house or at the fenced dog park.

  20. DEG

    According to Pinellas Park police, the 12-year-old boy had been “acting out” at lunch, so he was put in an isolated room called the “Room of Opportunity” with 34-year-old Dontae Thomas.

    Orwell would be proud.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Dontae saw his opportunity.

    • Q Continuum

      I dunno, could be accurate if the opportunity is to get the shit kicked out of you by a grown man.

    • Chipwooder

      The Ministry of Love undoubtedly has many Rooms of Opportunity for at-promise yutes.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Maybe pre-1970 feminists.

      Every other postmodern identity group has only ever been about one thing, power.

      • Chipwooder

        And Marxism. Don’t forget the Marxism.

    • Rhywun

      The BBC even went as far as to juxtapose Pettitt’s interview with photos of Hitler and German housewives giving the Nazi salute.

      Wow. That is how you propaganda – just balls-to-the-wall.

      • Gustave Lytton

        They’re testing the waters for a remake of Heil, Honey.

      • Tonio

        BBC or BBC?

        Asking for a friend…

  21. Certified Public Asshat

    A good day of Champions League results.

    • Ted S.

      I would have preferred more goals for Atlético.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Me too, but they kept Liverpool without an away goal (no shots even on target).

      • Rhywun

        Both of you are literally worse than Hitler.

      • robc

        Then I guess I am worse than worse than Hitler.

      • Rhywun

        Yes. Yes, you are.

      • robc

        Still better than Nikki. Or Liverpool fans.

      • C. Anacreon

        A few summers ago, I was traveling in Madrid and was there the same night Atlético won La Liga for the first time in forever. The entire city was a madhouse. I walked down to the big square and was accosted by some drunk Spaniard soccer hooligans who shouted at me, “who’s your favorite team?”
        I said “Atlético!” and they cheered, and didn’t attack me after all.

        So I’m fond of Atlético ever since, I think they saved me from a serious beating, so they can do no wrong in my eyes.

  22. R C Dean

    NHS staff can refuse to treat racist or sexist patients under new rules

    Gonna be rough for their “Syrian refugee” patients.

    • UnCivilServant

      “You need more cultural sensitivity training.”

    • Chipwooder

      There will be a Muslim exception to the rule.

  23. Mojeaux

    Unrelated to anything: XX got the job at Walmart and her orientation is Sunday!

    • UnCivilServant

      So far so good.

      Now she just needs to stick with it.

      • Mojeaux

        Now she just needs to stick with it.

        Fingers crossed.

        But I forgot to say that ALSO today, she had shadow time at the trade school in IT. She will be going there next year (should have gone this year but I didn’t have my crap together in time). She really really loved it.

        I told her if she could do both for the 2 years she was in trade school, she would have options.

    • Jarflax

      What do Sundays find attractive?

      • Mad Scientist
      • Mojeaux

        That took me a few seconds. LOL

    • RAHeinlein

      Congrats to you and Mo-the-Younger!

    • straffinrun

      Boom chicka bow wow. Does XX mean what I think?

      • Mojeaux

        XX = female
        XY = male

        TD = tax deduction

        I don’t say my children’s names on the internet and I don’t post pictures (and it’s taken me a while to convince Mr. Mojeaux to stop doing so).

      • straffinrun

        Good idea. Problem is when someone else puts their pics online.

      • Mojeaux

        We put a stop to that at church early on. XY refuses to allow his picture to be taken at all. As far as what XX and her friends do, I have no clue.

        It’s one of those things where I tell them the internet is forever, but XX is 16.5 now and she can build her own online persona. All I can say is that I didn’t do it for her and give her one.

      • straffinrun

        The entire concept of “online persona” is creepy. The singularity is going to be an abomination.

    • Shirley Knott

      Excellent! Congratulations to you both, jointly and severally!

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Yippee!

    • egould310

      Congrats to your daughter. Good luck to her. And you.

    • Cannoli

      Congrats!

    • DEG

      Excellent news!

    • MikeS

      Yaaasssss!!!

  24. Tres Cool

    UCS ? Did I note that you had Dayton, OH on your travel itinerary for this trip ?

      • Tres Cool

        I would be happy to make myself available.
        Have you given any thought to the Air Force Museum ?

      • hayeksplosives

        I used to go to Dayton OH to work on the Navy railgun!! Cool little city. Very proud of their aviation history.

      • Tres Cool

        Why would we have Navy in a land-loc……oh, never mind.

        Reminds me of my 1st trip to White Sands, where the Navy did missile tests. Weird to see those guys in their whites w/ dixie cup hats, in the middle of a bunch of sand.

      • l0b0t

        I did my AIT at Ft. Bliss. White Sands is where we did our field exercises. USAF dining facilities have Army mess halls beat by a country mile.

      • Tres Cool

        Yes, they do.

        Even tho I was in Army aviation, and we generally had the best mess halls on any post, AF still ate WAY better

      • UnCivilServant

        We were stopping there to visit that museum. So yes, we’ve thought about it.

      • UnCivilServant

        Any other recommendations? We don’t have scads of time, so lunch spots are probably going to be more useful.

      • Tres Cool

        Im not sure what fare you have in mind, but Ill assume its light-ish.

        Yo GT !

        You want to weigh in on this?

      • UnCivilServant

        Well, since I’m not exclusively in control of where we will eat, and I can’t predict the mood at the time, I collect the locals’ opinions so an informed choice can be made on the day

      • DEG

        I was at that museum about ten years ago.

        It’s worth the stop.

  25. Evan from Evansville

    Trump commutes Blagojevich.

    I have a lot to think about this, but right now I don’t have a lot of time to do so.

    (My passport is finally arriving back from the Korean consulate in Chicago TOMORROW….so lots of packing to do! Looks like my flight will be on Saturday. I’ll return to that once these errands right now are sorted.)

    1. Fuck Blagojevich, but I will say that I’m happy he has served eight years, supposedly very well. *Shrug* Got what you deserved.

    2. This is what all Ill. governors do. They are like S. Korean presidents and all end up in jail. Should surprise absolutely no one.

    3. Trump has been vocal for 3 or so years about what Blagojevich and was positive. *Shrug* Not sure what to think. Don’t know the guy personally.

    4. I GREATLY enjoy how this commutation frees a Team Blue and Obama-entrenched politician. That will be hard for them to wrap their heads around. Should be entertaining.

    5. The other 11 people the article mentions as being commuted–eh, I’m not sure of their history or doings and will wait to read more to pass judgement.

    https://www.npr.org/2020/02/18/807057090/trump-commutes-sentence-of-former-illinois-gov-rod-blagojevich?utm_source=facebook.com&utm_term=nprnews&utm_campaign=npr&utm_medium=social&fbclid=IwAR01QLJqwlGrYlvKp7ZyZkddOMRcMaFg5SyhqigXiZQ5ei6rWbvU8fVJ2nU

    • Raven Nation

      Two of them were apparently non-violent drug convictions. Michael Millikan also got one. I’ve read before (but have no knowledge of whether this is true or not), that he really got screwed over.

      • Mojeaux

        Milken played by the rules. Boesky threw him under the bus.

      • RAHeinlein

        ^^This.

      • Jarflax

        Ulbricht is still doing life.

      • straffinrun

        You can’t have people not convicted of murder just running around not committing murder.

      • Ted S.

        Starkweather homicide, children of thalidomide.

    • Rhywun

      This is what all Ill. governors do

      They need to learn some tips from New York governors. Only their toadies go to jail while the governors somehow remain squeaky-clean.

      • Chipwooder

        They learned well from Cris Carter – you have to have a fall guy

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The copsuckers on the USC will not help him.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      so far so good,

      • Tres Cool

        /tall cans @ Nevada

        HEY YUFUS!

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        You? in Nevada? where?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Brilliant, Seconded..

    • straffinrun

      Ha!

    • Spudalicious

      That was great.

  26. Tres Cool

    I would like to enter into the record that Meijer store-brand “Hot & Spicy” pork rinds are indeed that.

    Pretty damn hot.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Tall Cans!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Heh, wait until tomorrow.

      • Tres Cool

        Oh, I know

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Que?

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      I cannot tell a lie.
      It’s not me.

  27. straffinrun

    Why do people say, “I was thinking to myself…”?

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Because this could be heaven or this could be hell.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      As opposed to “. . . thinking out loud . . . ,” ferinstance.

      • straffinrun

        If you’re thinking out loud, you may need an oil change.

    • Mojeaux

      I said to myself, “Self,” I said…

      • C. Anacreon

        I said to myself, “Self,” I said…

        “Self, where did you put the car keys?”

    • Spudalicious

      You don’t have more than one voice in there?

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        I am called Legion, for we are many . . .

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        You are Tulpa, All are Tulpa…..

    • UnCivilServant

      Don’t Telepath Shame Us!

  28. Spudalicious

    You people don’t understand that the sick and injured exist to service the NHS. How else are you going to keep all those people employed. It’s like you don’t even shitlord.

    • JD is Unemployed

      BUT BUT BUT THE NHS IS BEING STARVED BY THE TORIES.

      Record levels of spending is never enough when the commie opposition can make promises of vajillions of magic £s.

  29. hayeksplosives

    Phew, I finally rid myself of that lovely old computer. The guy couldnt get it until tonight so I told him I was not putting my day on hold for his vague pickup. He dispatched a friend to get it for him.

    She was a lovely lass but completely deaf, so we used gestures to get our way through the deal. She was worried that the cat got out and was near her car, so I gestured a casual hand flip then said as i gestured that as soon as she turned the ignition, the cat would be out like a shot. She gave a thumbs up and when the cat ran out like a shot, waved and pulled out of the drive.

    That kind of deaf folk, I am pleased to deal with. Not a splinter on her shoulder, let alone a chip.

    • Spudalicious

      I have a nephew that is 90% deaf. He’s of that attitude.

    • Rhywun

      Had a deaf guy come to our house to buy a car once – he was real nice, too.

      • Tres Cool

        Did he check the horn ?

      • Rhywun

        *snort*

      • C. Anacreon

        My roommate in college had a blind girlfriend, whom he affectionately called “Blindy”. To her face.

        He also liked to have her naked on his bed and go down the hall and invite other guys to come have a look. “Don’t worry, she can’t see you!” he’d say.

        Of course, people with deficits in one sense usually develop enhanced abilities in the other senses. So she probably knew quite well from hearing and scents that all these guys were coming in to check her out. She must have enjoyed it in some weird way or she would have stopped him.

        Of course, you’d assume she’d tell him not to call her “Blindy” too, but never did. Strange gal. Even stranger guy. I think he’s in federal prison now.

      • hayeksplosives

        I find in general it’s way easier to socialize with blind folks than with deaf folks, mainly because they blind don’t go all “Blind commmmmmunnnitteeee” on ya, whereas many deaf do. The blind just blend in with everyone else and have a lot of spunk.

        In college I was in a park where a normally sighted dude ran into his blind friend and talked some smack. They exchanged normal pleasantries, and then the seeing dude says “Hey, what happened to your other dog? This is a black lab.” (it was a yellow one but he was yanking the dude’s chain). The blind guy zinged him right back and they laughed and went their separate ways.

      • hayeksplosives

        My deaf friend on the other hand unfriended me when I posted how ridiculous it was that Gallaudet University (great Uni for the deaf, and her alma mater) had forced UC-Berkeley to take down their free lectures on Youtube since they weren’t “accessible” to the deaf community. UC-Berkeley offered free rights to Gallaudet to do the captions or ASL or whatever, but wouldn’t pay them to do it.

        So Gallaudet sued, and UC-Berkeley took the only real course of action available: They took down the videos for EVERYONE so they couldn’t be excused of discrimination.

      • Not Adahn

        If you didn’t bring enough for everybody, you can’t have it!

  30. LJW

    Any pilots in here? 2 large jumbk jets just flew over my house in a line extremely close together. The rear plane was producing one large contrail. Seemed so strange that 2 jets would be flying so close together. Any ideas what was going on? Side note I haven’t noticed any gay frogs yet

    • Spudalicious

      Takes a while. They’ll be leap frogging each other by next week.

    • LJW

      Jumbo jets*

    • Tres Cool

      Just gay jets, duhdoi.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      Commercial, military, or completely unmarked?
      /readies tinfoil hat

      • LJW

        Couldn’t tell they were too high. Whiteman AFB is about 80 miles east of me and they were flying in that direction.

      • Mojeaux

        East? I thought you were in OP.

      • dbleagle

        Sounds like a refueling taking place.

      • Tres Cool

        Cosby-style….amirite ?

      • MikeS

        That’s my guess. Front one was a KC-135, I bet.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Ever since 9/11 some planes are afraid to go out alone. It’s understandable really.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Sometimes they’re just too young to be out by themselves.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Check your 6,

      • JD is Unemployed

        My 6 ought to be in bed, along with the rest of me. It’s aught 55 in the UK. Goodnight, yankee doodles.

      • Tres Cool

        …called it Macaroni! Or Marconi…or something

      • Tres Cool

        +1 Buggles

      • LJW

        Call it blaming the victim, but when they dress like this they’re just asking for trouble.

    • Ted S.

      Even Ted S.?

      • MikeS

        Even Ted. S.

      • Sean

        Wait, aren’t you two related?

      • MikeS

        Um…no.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Ted, you are irreplaceable,

      • Tres Cool

        TedS’ is indeed;

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        You too Fuck face,
        /First thing that popped into my thick skull

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Interesting take, predictable changes for a musician, but well done,

    • Not Adahn

      Man the first few seasons of SoA were great.

  31. Not Adahn

    I made something delicious for dinner that I will never be able to duplicate because a) I didn’t measure anything and b) the ingredients were of irregular quality.

    But as a description, red cabbage with beets and apples, served with smoked duck.

    Also consumption oriented:

    While Rittenhouse is overwhelmingly my favorite as far as price-per-yum goes, this Old Overholdt is far and away the best $19/bottle whiskey ever. And when I say $19/bottle, I mean $19 for a 1 liter bottle.

    • Sean

      You ain’t wrong. It’s pretty tastey.

      I’ll buy a bottle occasionally.

      • Not Adahn

        I’ll keep a bottle around for mixing rye at the very least.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Shit, Abv wise that’s way cheaper than good craft beer,

    • MikeS

      Your comment just inspired me to pour a nightcap of Overholt. Good stuff.

      This reminds me…anybody have experience with Ezra Brooks? The booze store has it on sale for $20, and the bottler is currently offering a $6 mail in rebate on top of that. For a 1.75 liter. It’s almost so cheap you have to buy it just because, but not being a big cocktails guy I want something I can drink with nothing more than a splash of water. Opinions?

  32. Tres Cool

    LET’S GO FLYERS !