Wednesday Afternoon SugarLinks

by | Feb 26, 2020 | Daily Links | 364 comments

Inside the Extremely Vanilla World of Pete Buttigieg Fanfiction

Thirty-eight-year-old presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg would be winning the election if the election was held on Archive of Our Own, an open-source platform of slightly highbrow user-submitted fanworks from a variety of fandoms. On Archive of Our Own, Buttigieg and husband Chasten Glezman are the stars of user-submitted fanfiction or, more specifically, RPF—real person fiction—which has been popular in fannish circles for decades. In these nearly 70 stories, Buttigieg and Glezman’s relationship is the focus. Some of the RPFs are sincere and sweet, while others are House of Cards rip-offs, with Buttigieg advisor Lis Smith delivering Aaron Sorkin-paced dialogue. And then, of course, are the explicit RPFs, which fantasizes about the intimate details of Buttigieg and Glezman’s relationship. AO3’s chaotic, free-for-all tagging system with phrases like “it was supposed to be smut but then I killed someone” and “i swear this isn’t straight angst, (it’s gay angst) it’s clear to see why Buttigieg, of all the politicians running for president right now, would become fannish fodder. It’s parasocial relationships with politicians arriving at its most obvious endpoint.

I hate to agree with a Jezebel article, but this is sadly true. I read thirty of these with the most promising titles and they are all weaksauce, seriously lacking in the sort of hot man-on-man action fans crave. They barely let the man bust a nut.


Damn you, Trump! They are obviously following his secret orders!

Hindu Nationalist Gangs Roam New Delhi Streets as Deadly Religious Riots in India Kill Dozens

Days of violent clashes between Hindu and Muslim mobs in New Delhi have left as many as two dozen dead and hundreds injured, putting the country on edge. Donald Trump and Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi soaked up much of the media spotlight during the American president’s visit this week, but in the background, violence played out in relation to monthslong protests over religion-based citizenship laws. The mood of the capital has been tense since Modi’s Hindu nationalist governing party enacted the Citizenship Amendment Act in December, which allows settled refugees from neighboring countries Pakistan and Bangladesh and nearby Afghanistan fast-track citizenship. The law, however, conspicuously excludes Muslim residents, sparking anger among the some 200 million Muslims living in India. The law also led members of Modi’s Bharatiya Janata Party to muse about undertaking an operation to “verify” Indian Muslims’ status as citizens writ large, a not-so-subtle threat to the country’s largest minority group.


Maria Sharapova Steps Away From The Game

Sharapova retiring is not much of a shock. She probably should have just quit after getting suspended for two years for performance-enhancing drugs.

I always loved to watch her play: the grunting, the insane glaring… oh, the shiver of pleasure I felt.

Her career will always have an asterisk by it. She won five Majors, but how many more would she have won without Serena Williams in her way?


London Doctors Are Accused of Removing a Transgender Man’s Vagina Without His Consent

Two doctors in London have been suspended after performing an irreversible vaginectomy on a transgender man without his consent.

Metro UK reports that the nonconsensual procedure was performed by Drs. Marco Capece and Giulo Garaffa in 2016, at Highgate Private Hospital. The patient, who had begun transitioning in 2013, reportedly consented to a hysterectomy and a metoidioplasty, but did not want his vagina removed. Garaffa reportedly did not check the patient’s medical notes and performed the vaginectomy anyway. Capece is accused of later altering the patient’s consent form to make it look like he wanted the procedure.


Democrats Effectively Demonstrate That There Are Too Many Democratic Candidates Left

CBS MODERATOR MARGARET BRENNAN: Sen. Sanders, your response.

SANDERS: Let us be clear, do we think health care for all, Pete, is some kind of radical communist idea?

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: Well, you brought this up, let’s talk about that.

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: Do we think raising the minimum wage to a living wage…

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: I’m happy to respond to the question because this is really important…

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: … do we think building the millions of units of affordable housing that we need…

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: If you’re going to ask that rhetorical question, let’s…

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: … do we think raising taxes on billionaires is a radical idea?

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: Let’s talk about this. Let’s talk about what’s radical about that plan.

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: Do you think criminal justice reform is a radical idea?

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: The things you just named are things…

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: Do you think immigration reform? The truth is, Pete…

(CROSSTALK)

BRENNAN: One at a time.

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: … the American people support my agenda.

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: The way you’re talking about doing it is radical by…

(CROSSTALK)

SANDERS: That is why I am beating Trump in virtually every poll that is done, and why I will defeat him.

(CROSSTALK)

BUTTIGIEG: We’ve got to open this up. Universal health care, for example…

Yup, that’s the way to have a debate, all right.


About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

364 Comments

  1. A Leap at the Wheel

    Its not a big accomplishment, but I picked up four plates and set them down again for the first time since July last year. So that was nice.

    • kinnath

      Bone china or stoneware?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Bumper plates. Looked like Duplo!

    • Tundra

      Good job, brother!

  2. Mojeaux

    “He did not want his vagina removed.”

    There’s something you don’t hear every day.

    Drama in the ER. Shouting and profanity and stark ravings. Totally awesome. They keep closing our door, tho.

    • leon

      Every time i end up having to go to the ER (which is thankfully rare) I think: You know if it is between dying on the street or at home, or among all these lunatics… I might take my chances at home.

      • C. Anacreon

        Leon got so sad, dejected, put on his hat and start to run
        Runnin’ down the street yellin’ at the top of his lungs, oh yeah
        All I want in this life of mine is some good clean fun!
        All I want in this life and time is some hit and run!

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Let me guess, someone made an offhand “our tax dollars at work” comment and you recited John Galt’s speech from heart at the top of your voice?

      • Mojeaux

        All 63 pages, yup.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Huh. And here I thought that memorizing The Cremation of Sam McGee in 5th Grade was an accomplishment.

      • pistoffnick

        There are strange things done in the midnight sun
        By the men who moil for gold;
        The Arctic trails have their secret tales
        That would make your blood run cold.

      • C. Anacreon

        The Arctic trails have their secret tales
        That would make your blood run cold.
        And the eskimo chicks
        That are known for ticks
        And odiferous vaginal mold.

      • Gadfly

        The best thing I ever memorized for school was from Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar, where Mark Antony is speaking to Caesar’s corpse. Anything that starts “Oh pardon me, thou bleeding piece of earth, that I am meek and gentle with these butchers” and ends with “Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war” is much more exciting than most stuff you learn in school.

      • Mojeaux

        Except, as a tee shirt I once bought said, “John Galt’s got nothing in Hank Rearden.”

        Hank >>>>>> Galt.

        Fight me.

      • Mojeaux

        nothing ON

        ON

        ON

        not “in”

      • Ted S.

        Well, Ayn Rand’s characters are into odd sexual fetishes.

      • Mojeaux

        Meh. Rough sex. Rape by engraved invitation. Not odd or even kinky.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Go on…

      • Mojeaux

        I would quote the entire 3 sentences of Dominique and Roark’s interlude, but I’m on my phone.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        I read that as “John Galt’s got nothing in Hank’s Rear End.”

        I’m going to Hell.

      • Mojeaux

        I realized wjat it looked like as soon as I hit post. *headdesk*

        No slash fiction happening here.

      • Bobarian LMD

        It sounds like the Pete BootieJug stuff that Mr. Saccharine was looking for.

    • SugarFree

      Yeah, one time I had to go the ER was the night of a college football game. The drunk guy who climbed up on a road sign, fell and had a concussion was hilarious. He kept accusing the nurses of coming on to him.

      • Gustave Lytton

        My ER visit was waiting so long that the local anesthetic which took forever to get administered wore off before the stitches were inserted, a guy running down the hallway with shit coming out of his ass pursued by a security guard, and the nurse coming around saying ‘oh, I didn’t know you were still here. I wouldn’t have gone to lunch if I’d known’ (was still waiting for the stitches at that point).

      • Enough About Palin

        I rarely go to the ER, but when I do it’s for things like tearing my knee out and it’s 9:00 pm. I always go to North Memorial because it’s close and its North the kind of hospital known for sowing the arms back on to idiot North Dakota farmers who get their arms ripped off by a combine or some such thing. And are great. The wait is usually reasonably short and the last time I was there, the staff overseeing the waiting room was attentive enough to notice that I was going into shock and immediately wheeled out this armoire filled with heated blankets that they used to cover me up.

      • Ted S.

        I’d think sowing arms would result in their winding up all over the place, not where they belong.

      • Bobarian LMD

        That’s for when you might want an extra arm.

      • Fourscore

        Let me give you a hand, Buddy.

      • Shirley Knott

        Alas, that only works for teeth, I believe it was.

      • Drake

        Last time I had to take my wife, it was like waiting at a Tijuana bus station. When she complains about our healthcare costs, I remind her of that night and the fact that we were probably the only paying customers there.

    • Animal

      Our oldest daughter has worked in ERs for fifteen years or so. She’s now an NP in a small community hospital ER in eastern Iowa.

      To hear her tell it, what you describe is just a normal Friday or Saturday night in the ER. They have enough meth-heads in the area to keep things interesting.

      • Mojeaux

        This is a rural-turned-upper-end-suburban hospital with very few meth-heads around.

        I’ve been here many a time, usually late at night, and never had this much entertainment or this long a wait.

      • Animal

        Most of her work is vehicle accidents, elderly folks after a fall, or farm accidents. It’s just the weekends that bring the skids and tweaks out.

  3. leon

    I’m not a Radical! I just think that we aren’t being evenhanded about Fidel Castro.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Know who else doesn’t get a fair shake from American politicians?

      • ChipsnSalsa

        Nancy Pelosi?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Michael J Fox?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Shakes fist at Scruffy. Shakily.

      • A Leap at the Wheel
      • Suthenboy

        Voters?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Shaken Voter Syndrome.

      • PBRstreetgang

        Elvis?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Larry Craig?

  4. The Late P Brooks

    The patient, who had begun transitioning in 2013, reportedly consented to a hysterectomy and a metoidioplasty, but did not want his vagina removed.

    Stop it, you’re killing me.

    • invisible finger

      I’m morbidly curious about what they do with the removed vaginas. Is there a waiting list like for livers and kidneys?

      • SugarFree

        There’s a schnauzer that waits very patiently under the operating table.

      • Suthenboy

        Now that made me laugh.

      • B.P.

        Schnauzers prefer the ones slathered in peanut butter.

      • Below Sea Level Hell Centro

        Light on the kibbles heavy on the bits.

      • Mojeaux

        Vagina floating in a jar full of formaldehyde.

      • SugarFree

        “The lid is unscrewing itself! RUN, DAMN YOU! RUN!”

      • Jarflax

        Ed Gein II Trans-surgeon boogaloo

    • Chafed

      How does a vagina get removed? I understand there are interior organs that can be removed. The vagina is an orifice. During a transition, doesn’t it get “filled”, so to speak, to become a penis?

      • Tundra

        Spackle.

      • Mojeaux

        Ouch.

        *clamps thighs together*

  5. invisible finger

    I’ll concede that socialist/communist ideas are no longer radical ideas.

    They’re still horribly bad ideas though.

  6. Winston

    his vagin

    The great future.

    /Gets sent to re-education

  7. Suthenboy

    Highbrow fanfic? Now there is an oxymoron for you.

    I get it. Orangemanbad. Why hasn’t anyone told me this before?

    “She won five Majors, but how many more would she have won without Serena Williams in her way?”
    The same number I would win with no one in my way. All of ’em.

    Do I think instituting the same policies as the USSR is a radical communist idea?
    Yeah Bernie. I do. Now fuck off.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    FYI/PSA:

    MGTD from previous post sold for $19,250. You couldn’t build it for that. You probably couldn’t get a crashed TD donor car for 25k, much less round up the rest of the pieces.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    SANDERS: … the American people support my agenda.

    No, Granddad, those are just the voices in your head.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    I’m morbidly curious about what they do with the removed vaginas. Is there a waiting list like for livers and kidneys?

    I hear they make hats out of them.

    • Suthenboy

      I think they make toys out of them but for the life of me I cant remember what they are called.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Turtlenecks for chihuahuas

  11. Scruffy Nerfherder

    We have our own special kind of DNC fanfic here at glibertarians.com

    *chokes back a tinge of vomit*

  12. The Other Kevin

    Great song by a great songwriter.

  13. Winston

    Is it time to panic about Coronavirus?

  14. grrizzly

    Buttigieg and husband Chasten Glezman are the stars of user-submitted fanfiction

    Given that everyone else still running is old enough to qualify for senior assisted housing, it’s not surprising.

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Chasten. Who names their kid that? It’s pretty much a guarantee that he’ll be gay.

  15. Rebel Scum

    I read thirty of these with the most promising titles

    For “research”, I’m sure…

    Maria Sharapova

    *unzips*

    I don’t need any performance enhancing drugs, baby.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      Rebel, why do you even wear pants?

      • Rebel Scum

        Dramatic effect.

      • Gadfly

        The same reason theaters have curtains.

      • Bobarian LMD

        I always assumed he just had a zipper, to announce his intentions.

  16. Sensei

    Always buy your esoteric murder weapons on Amazon and use a vehicle with GPS logging.

    Instead, investigators honed in on Whall after finding the Land Rover Discovery in a deserted quarry on June 3, 2019. The car had been set on fire, but its sophisticated GPS system had recorded all of his travels, down to when the engine turned on and when the doors opened and closed. According to the BBC, the “black box” showed that Whall had been near Corrigan’s home on the night of the attack and scoped out the area the night before…

    Other pieces of evidence pointed to the 39-year-old. The arrow that killed Corrigan was made of a 20-inch fiberglass shaft topped with a bright green bladed broadhead, North Wales Live reported. According to prosecutors, only two people in the United Kingdom had purchased that exact same combination from Amazon in the year leading up to Corrigan’s death. One had been planning a hunting trip to South Africa. The other was Whall.

    TW: WP – A retiree was shot in a ‘medieval-style’ crossbow execution. The killer’s Amazon purchase helped give him away.

    • Suthenboy

      Average IQ of criminals: 90

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Average IQ of criminals who got caught: 90

        There is some co-linearity going on here.

      • Suthenboy

        I was going to tell a long story about that but I am eating nachos and my fingers are greasy and nachos getting cold so in the interest of brevity….

      • Jarflax

        D’oh

      • Jarflax

        Criminals that get caught. Just sayin’

      • leon

        ^^^^ This

        The smarter end of criminals go into white color crime.

        and the smartest don’t get caught.

      • Animal

        The smarter end of criminals go into white color crime.

        Or politics.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Most pols I’ve met aren’t that bright. Most seem to be failed businessmen, or schoolteachers.

      • Jarflax

        Smarter? Politics? AOC, Jackson Lee, Johnson, say no.

      • Bobarian LMD

        The best criminals are the men behind the throne.

        V. Jarrett, Rahm, D. Cheney,

  17. B.P.

    “SANDERS: That is why I am beating Trump in virtually every poll that is done, and why I will defeat him.”

    I’ve seen a fair amount of chatter the last couple of days about how well Sanders is polling vs. Trump in the general, and this seems impossible to me. Perhaps I’m the one in the bubble.

    And it brings me to a grave dilemma. In its infinite wisdom, my state recently nut-kicked the principle of free association by creating open primaries for unaffiliated voters, of which I am one. I have two ballots in my hand, and I’m tempted to vote for Bernie in the Dem primary, just to help amplify the chaos. But now he’s, like, succeeding and stuff.

    • invisible finger

      Can’t you take a Dem ballot and write in Trump?

      • B.P.

        Hmmmm….. Well, shoot. There’s no write-in line for the primary, it seems.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      The polls worked out super awesome last time.

    • Suthenboy

      Hillary has a 97% chance of winning the 2016 election.

      I saw where 175,000 people tried to get into a trump rally in the last week or so. Yep, he is a lost cause. Sanders has it in the bag.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Suthen, you should watch RazorFist’s latest rant about the differences in turnout for the various Democrats (esp. Sanders) and Trump. Foul-mouthed, hilarious, and probably spot-on.

      • Suthenboy

        The guy likes the sound of his own voice a bit too much for me. I cant sit through his rants. He takes half of an hour to say what could be said in about three sentences.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        He takes half of an hour to say what could be said in about three sentences.

        He and my wife would get along famously.

      • Suthenboy

        I know the type. Ask them what time it is and they will explain in great detail how to build a clock.

      • Bobarian LMD

        My daughter can talk for 15 minutes and I can repeat what she said to me in a sentence fragment.

      • Fourscore

        We have the same daughter?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Why use 3 words when 30 work just as well?

      • Ted S.

        Yeah, it’s so much easier to read a blog post than to sit through a video like that.

    • Winston

      No time for complacency, ever.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      What polls are those?

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        If that holds true for the general, but ends up being the popular vote, and if California, Washington and New York make the same contribution to that percentage as last time, Trump would probably walk away with more EC votes once again.

        Really, pollsters need to start breaking these massively low-vote-efficiency blocks out to get rid of some of the useless information.

      • SugarFree

        The polls of a general public that don’t know even half of what Sanders has planned.

    • Ted S.

      Make certain somebody else gets to 15% and gets some of those sweet sweet delegates, making a brokered convention that little bit more likely.

    • Gadfly

      I’ve seen a fair amount of chatter the last couple of days about how well Sanders is polling vs. Trump in the general, and this seems impossible to me. Perhaps I’m the one in the bubble.

      According to the polling averages, Trump consistently gets 45-46% of the vote against any candidate, all of whom out-poll him. Unless there are a lot of shy Trump voters, this election will be a close one (but then again, the last one was close as well, with Trump getting, huh, 46% of the vote). I still think if it’s Sanders v Trump that Sanders will get crushed, but not by nearly as much of a margin as a socialist deserves. His spending plans are so ludicrous that they will demand hiking middle class taxes to work, so a round of commercials hammering that point home (Sanders = $5K pay cut) should make him un-electable.

      • LJW

        They just need commercials with video of him saying good things about the USSR and Cuba.

      • Chipwooder

        The R/D/I spread in a lot of those polls is laughable, though.

    • one true athena

      I feel that starts treading close to ‘play stupid games, win stupid prizes’ because, yeah, what if he does win? If too many non-leftists do it as a tactic, it starts to look like the same play the Democrats made to elevate Trump thinking Hillary could beat him easily, and we all know how that turned out.

      • B.P.

        Exactly.

    • Rhywun

      I look at how Corbyn got trounced in the UK and the Gaia candidate lost in Australia, and I ask myself how can it be that Sanders might actually win in the US?? It beggars belief.

    • Rebel Scum

      this seems impossible to me.

      National poll vs polling by state, perhaps. And the polls are notoriously skewed towards Democrats.

      • kinnath

        National polls mean jack shit.

        The presidential election is 50 state elections. Bernie can’t fucking win in Iowa. I doubt he can win in any of the rust belt states that Trump took away from the dems (or the dems threw away) in the last election.

        I further doubt that Bernie can carry all the states that Hillary took.

        The Donald will crush Bernie in the electoral college.

  18. Gadfly

    I read thirty of these with the most promising titles and they are all weaksauce, seriously lacking in the sort of hot man-on-man action fans crave. They barely let the man bust a nut.

    Show them the way. Submit something to that site, and either enlighten them or scare them away. Either way the world will be a better place.

  19. Rufus the Monocled

    Trump is the first true black President.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Every major player and investor understands the days of oil are numbered.

      I guess in the same way that everyone’s days are numbered, the United State’s days are numbered, and the sun’s days are numbered…

      • Gadfly

        Indeed. Every person’s days are numbered, but we don’t run around telling kids they have to plan for their funeral.

    • Suthenboy

      They have been saying that since the early 1940’s.

      • Winston

        Divestment!

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      I didn’t realize that Scott Gilmore had his head shoved that far up his ass.

      • Winston

        Well he works for Macleans

        And I am awaiting Turdeau to cancel that pipeline and give the Indians and the watermelons full veto over any projects. Canadians might be poor and in the dark but at least he is well off and they will vote Liberal.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Even with a minority government Justin can still wreak mayhem.

      • Winston

        Where’s Cytotoxic? He though Turdeau was going to be good.

      • Bobarian LMD

        He felt. There was no evidence of thought.

      • Winston

        Also he’s got the Bloc and NDP propping him up.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Crazy and Bonkers.

        Cytotoxic disappeared and he was stupid to believe that.

      • Winston

        Harper bad and Chrétien was the End of History so Libertarian Moment. The Canadian equivalent of Orange Man Bad and Bill Clinton was the End of History so Libertarian Moment.

  20. Rebel Scum

    We are just doing this for your own safety, you rube.

    However, it’s a grave mistake to assume people disagree with you because they don’t understand, especially when the subject of gun rights arises.

    Yet that’s precisely what one gun-control activist alleges is driving the push to defend our Second Amendment rights.

    ”Linda Brundage, the executive director of the Michigan Coalition to Prevent Gun Violence, told Stateside that she thinks much of the outrage about gun control legislation stems from a misunderstanding about what those laws would do.

    “I think it’s really unfortunate that it’s so divisive. And what that suggests to me is people are not talking to one another,” she said. “The gun industry is selling fear so that people believe they must be armed. Again, nobody wants to take away guns.””‘

    Brundage argues that red flag laws aren’t about taking away people’s guns but about “safety.”

    ”“And it seems like, you know, this effort in Michigan, at this present time, is designed to prevent the passage of this legislation, these kinds of legislations. And from our perspective, that’s unfortunate because we know they will save lives.””

    • Heroic Mulatto

      “Again, nobody wants to take away guns”

      And, again, that’s demonstrably false.

      • Sensei

        (1) A person convicted of a misdemeanor crime of domestic violence shall not possess, use, transport, sell, purchase, carry, ship, receive, or distribute a firearm or ammunition in this state.

        HOUSE BILL NO. 4497

        We didn’t think you’d check…

    • Chipwooder

      Again, nobody wants to take away guns

      Even most of her brethren don’t parrot this bullshit anymore.

      • Bobarian LMD

        We don’t want to take them away… but we’re definitely never going to give them back.

    • Gustave Lytton

      we know they will save lives

      That’s a lie worthy of Goebbels or St Ralph the Liar.

    • Jarflax
    • Suthenboy

      “Again, nobody wants to take away guns.”

      Back to that? They already took off the mask and admitted explicitly that (we knew all along) that is exactly what they want to do.

      Gun grabbers lie. Every word is calculated to deceive.

      Again, no one wants you to be unable to defend yourself for your own good.

    • Animal

      Again, nobody wants to take away guns.

      Utter horseshit.

    • Gadfly

      Brundage argues that red flag laws aren’t about taking away people’s guns but about “safety.”

      Red flag laws are literally about taking away people’s guns. That’s literally the heart of those laws.

      Also, just for a bonus round, you know who else claimed their actions were all about “safety”?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Your mom?

        Well, everybody’s mom.

    • EvilSheldon

      She’s advertising. ‘Nobody wants to take away your guns,’ is a catch phrase. Everybody involved in the discussion knows that it’s bullshit. It doesn’t have to be true to be effective.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’ll see your asses and raise you one ball.

      • Q Continuum

        yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaas….

  21. wdalasio

    Two doctors in London have been suspended after performing an irreversible vaginectomy on a transgender man without his consent.

    Am I the only person who has to stop and think about transitioning from what to what when they hear this jargon? Perhaps more importantly, why would you want to “transition to a man” and keep your vagina? So you can go f**k yourself? It just sounds like like the doctor gave “him” a freebie.

    • Heroic Mulatto

      I’d fuck me.

      Jus’ sayin’.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Are you tucking when you say it, though?

      • wdalasio

        Okay, Buffalo Bill.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Is there anyone you wouldn’t?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      You’re not dealing with rational people. I don’t understand why any doctor would risk their livelihoods in order to provide optional services to someone who is probably clinically insane.

    • Not Adahn

      It’s NHS, it was free ayway.

  22. Heroic Mulatto

    You know, I was thinking about the “Caronavirus” tweet and a fascinating thought just occurred to me:

    What if former commenter “John” was just Donald Trump this entire time?

    • Gustave Lytton

      The hilarity of the Oval Office banter as John/DJT berates staffers for doing something dumb in his mind would be overtake Aaron Sorkin’s writing.

      • Florida Man

        You’re smarter than this GL. You just wants gays to think you’re cool. You don’t really believe what you think you believe!

      • Gustave Lytton

        *hangs head down while trying to stifle laughter*

      • Rhywun

        Right? He should shut up before he embarrasses himself any further.

    • Ted S.

      I’m disappointed. I thought you were smarter than that.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Pretty sure this John (not kidding)

      https://www.deseret.com/2019/9/18/20859319/donald-trump-2020-immigration-israel-brett-kavanaugh-obamacare-republican

      John Kluge, 49, an attorney who lives in the suburbs of Washington, D.C., cheers the president for fulfilling his pledge to reduce federal regulations, which the Heritage Foundation says resulted in $23 billion in savings in 2018.

      “Ronald Reagan talked a good game, but in the end, while he didn’t expand regulation, he didn’t reduce it that much. Donald Trump is the first president to actually reduce it. That is earth-shattering; it’s such a big deal, and it is such an underplayed story,” he said.

      It’s unknown exactly how many federal regulations exist, but just between 1995 and 2016, Congress passed 88,899 rules and regulations, according to Forbes.

      In 2018, Heritage reported, the Trump administration took 57 deregulatory actions and 14 regulatory actions, and under Trump, there were fewer new regulations enacted in the first 22 months in office than under other presidents: 22 for Trump, 465 for George W. Bush and 647 for Barack Obama.

      Moreover, Kluge says, “He’s recognized the threat of China, and that is enormously important. Russia is not the threat; it’s China. He also got us out of the Iranian deal, put pressure on Iran. And the thing I like about it is, he’s done so in a way that is reasonable and gives our adversaries a way to walk away from the situation and solve the problem.

      “A lot of times in the past, what the U.S. has done is demand that our adversaries do whatever we want and offer them absolutely nothing in return. Trump, because he lives in the real world, seems to understand that you can’t do that. You have to give the Chinese, the North Koreans, whoever, a reason to deal with you. I’m very satisfied with his foreign policy and that he’s told Europe they need to defend themselves more.”

      All this is not to say that Kluge doesn’t sometimes cringe at things the president says or tweets. But he believes Trump’s actions in office matter more than his words, and adds, “The idea that a politician should be some moral exemplar that we can all look up to vastly overemphasizes the importance of government.”

      “The president is hired help. If he does his job well, who cares whether he’s the kind of person you want your daughter to date?”

      Finally, Kluge says some of the Democratic contenders are making the case for Trump in 2020 with left-of-left positions that evoke socialism.

      “One thing that scares me is how far off the rails the Democrats have gone. I don’t want to live in a world where the alternatives are the Republicans or the too-crazy-and-too-stupid-to-vote-for-under-any-circumstance party. And the Democrats are getting close to that. … If they lose (next year), hopefully we’ll have reasonable Democrats again.”

      • Chipwooder

        Kluge? Is he related to the billionaire Kluges?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        There’s a lot of Kluges around, but I guess it’s possible.

        The Kluges in Charlottesville are more likely to be related to Werner Kluge.

      • Chipwooder

        Are there? I guess I didn’t know that because the only Kluges I’ve ever heard of are the fabulously wealthy ones, mainly because of the Aboriginal art museum named after him at UVA.

      • Not Adahn

        He didn’t call the reporter a halfwit.

      • Sensei

        That’s what I remember as well.

        Why I support Trump — and resent the elites trying to destroy him

        Let me say up front that I am a lifelong Republican and conservative. I have never voted for a Democrat in my life and have voted in every presidential and midterm election since 1988. I have never in my life considered myself anything but a conservative. I am pained to admit that the conservative media and many conservatives’ reaction to Donald Trump has caused me to no longer consider myself part of the movement.

      • grrizzly

        That’s definitely him. There’s even a picture of him.

      • Fourscore

        “John Kluge is an attorney living in Washington. He served in the US Army for nine years, including two deployments in Iraq and Kuwait.”

        That’s the one. John would always challenge anyone’s ME expertise.

    • Jarflax

      Their taste in women didn’t line up. Maybe John is the Presidential shitter-twitter proofer?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Read that last word as “poofer”.

      • SugarFree

        It’s spelled “fluffer.”

    • Enough About Palin

      “What if former commenter “John” was just Donald Trump this entire time?”

      Well they’re both lousy spellers, so there’s that.

    • Drake

      I assume Bernie will continue building a wall on the southern border – to keep us in.

    • Gadfly

      Joe Biden Claims He Is Only Human Left On Earth Not Killed By Gun Violence

      The sad thing is that the satire site had to go this extreme just to stay more than an order of magnitude above what he actually said.

  23. Winston

    https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/feb/26/sustainable-vagina-revolution-underway-beware-homemade-tampons

    however, it appears that a sustainable vagina revolution is under way.

    ….

    There is a huge lack of transparency around the toxins in tampons, and a dearth of data on how safe they are. Then there is the fact that single-use menstrual products are expensive and an environmental nightmare. And while menstrual cups are an economical and sustainable alternative, they can also seem intimidating.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      Is every opinion writer at The Grauniad completely nucking futs?

  24. Yusef drives a Kia

    I played Golf in Kingman, at a Private course today, Beautiful Scenery, 5000 ft elevation, had a blast,
    Where’s that Pin at?
    https://photos.app.goo.gl/JELfpiaedSYUNMwT8

    • Rhywun

      “How not to be seen”

  25. The Late P Brooks

    Vox shills for sacred high Mandarinate

    Billionaire and presidential candidate Tom Steyer thinks the problem with Congress is that its members have too much experience.

    At Tuesday’s debate, Steyer pressed his proposal to impose term limits on lawmakers. “I am for term limits of 12 years for every congressperson and senator,” Steyer said, pointing out that term limits would “get rid of Mitch McConnell and Lindsey Graham and Ted Cruz.”

    ——-

    Constitutional limits aside, term limits are the sort of reform that may seem intuitive to many voters, but that is widely rejected by political scientists and others who’ve studied their impact closely. As Dartmouth government professor Brendan Nyhan said of Steyer, “few politicians have worked so hard or spent so much to, in effect, troll an entire scientific field.”

    A 2006 report from the National Conference of State Legislatures examined states with term-limited lawmakers. It determined that term limits tend to increase the influence of lobbyists and lead to a “decline in civility” that “reduced legislators’ willingness and ability to compromise and engage in consensus building.”

    Term-limited lawmakers, the NCSL explained, “have less time to get to know and trust one another” and “are less collegial and less likely to bond with their peers, particularly those from across the aisle.”

    Such lawmakers often do not have enough time to learn how the legislature works or to master difficult policy issues. And they can’t turn to senior colleagues to give them this information because there are no senior colleagues. That “forces term-limited legislators to rely on lobbyists for information,” because lobbyists are able to spend years mastering legislative process and developing institutional memory about recurring policy debates.

    Yes, the legislature is a higher plane of existence. Only the most devoted members of the cult, having a lifelong familiarity with the arcana of the sacred spellcasting should be allowed entry. Otherwise, chaos.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Perhaps that just means the government is too powerful and complicated.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, I don’t want them “master[ing] difficult policy issues”.

    • Suthenboy

      I am sure it is just coincidence but his list of ‘get rid of’ only includes republicans.

  26. Pope Jimbo

    Mary Kiffmeyer is a Minnesoda hack politician. She was Sec of State when I met her. Her favorite thing was to ask consultants to write RFP’s for various projects (that is what I was helping on), then once the proposals were received she wouldn’t act on them.

    Now she’s a local state pol, but her ideas are as stupid as ever.

    SAINT PAUL, MN — A bill introduced in the Minnesota Senate seeks to make Daylight Saving Time a year-round feature in Minnesota. Mary Kiffmeyer, a Republican from Big Lake, introduced the measure last week. She argues that time changes are harmful to the public.

    “Flipping back and forth is hard on our bodies,” Kiffmeyer told follow state senators Tuesday. She says it would be better to stay in the same time throughout the year.

    “The incidents of heart attacks goes up dramatically during springing forward and falling back,” Kiffmeyer said.

    “Accidents also increase. Even pets are affected by the one-hour change. About every facet of your life. Asthmatic attacks. These are documented things that effect all ages,” she added.

    With Kiffmeyer’s bill, Minnesotans would see more daylight in the evening, but less in the morning.

    I am actually very sympathetic to not honoring DST at all. I just have no idea why jumping ahead by an hour makes any sense. Why not just let businesses change their hours of operation if they want?

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Florida’s legislature passed that last year, though it would need to be approved by federal law before happening.

      I really don’t care either way, but I’d love to stick to one all year.

      • Chipwooder

        It’s nice not having to dick around with your clocks. Loved that when I lived in Arizona.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        It is nice,

      • Oy the Billy-Bumbler

        I read that as “it’s nice not having a dick”

      • Pope Jimbo

        I’d love to see DST get tanked and never have to mess with clocks too. It just irritates me that for some reason she thinks we need to mandate by law that we all set our clocks ahead by one hour.

        Why not just vote to not mess with clocks? Then let people mess around with their work schedules however they want?

        I might be overly sensitive because I know what a dim bulb she is and saw her waste shit tons of taxpayer money on stupid meetings.

      • Ted S.

        I’d rather have the excess daylight after dinner.

      • grrizzly

        Both New York and Massachusetts can move to the Atlantic time zone. No summer time. In other words, keep the current daylight savings time in the winter.

      • The Hyperbole

        Eat dinner earlier.

    • Mojeaux

      I would like for saving time to be in and standard time to be out.

      • Gustave Lytton

        ^^^^ you’ve got my vote, Mojo

  27. Bobarian LMD

    Concerning Sharapova, this is almost NSFW.

    It’s why I love her.

    • Animal

      My bunk.

      I’ll be in it.

      • Tundra

        That was great!

        Stupid on the part of the fans, though. Elite competitors love the hate. A good friend of mine said he loved away games more because the heckling and booing got him way more fired up than cheers.

    • Rhywun

      Heh. She had an unusual style beyond the grunting too.

  28. Q Continuum

    RE: Maria Sharapova.

    If there were any justice in the world she’d follow up her tennis career with a career in porn.

    • Bobarian LMD

      She’s got the soundtrack down.

      • Ted S.

        She’s faking it.

  29. Drake

    The promised Shika article has arrived. Ornage-man bad because Hindus and Muslims are fighting in the streets. All Trump’s fault, nothing at all to do with the worst holocaust in history.

    • leon

      She’s so predictable.

    • Winston

      I remember she was pulling the same stuff about Obama and Zuckerberg meeting Modi at the same Reason was supporting opening up Cuba.

    • Q Continuum

      For me, her arrival was the turning point of TOS.

      • Chipwooder

        Did she get there before Weigel?

  30. grrizzly

    Gender-Neutral U.S. Passports Could Be Coming Soon

    New legislation in the U.S. House of Representatives would create a gender-neutral option for U.S. passports. The bill, H.R. 5962, would “require the inclusion of a gender neutral designation in a passport, passport card, or Consular Report of Birth Abroad.”

    If the legislation passes, “the Secretary of State shall, not later than one year after the date of the enactment of this section… permit an applicant for a passport, passport card, or Consular Report of Birth Abroad … to use an “unspecified” (X) gender designation.”

    The option would be available to any applicant, regardless of the sex listed on their birth certificate, their gender presentation, or other qualifying conditions. No one could be forced to mark “unspecified” as their gender, even if the applicant “has one or more identity documents bearing a sex or gender designation other than male (M) or female (F).”

    Interestingly enough, my passport is already gender-neutral: it has the field for “sex”–not “gender.”

    • Jarflax

      So we have to give the feds more access to our State records to fly domestically, but we are making passports less informative? How about we go back to no papers needed for anything except voting?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        You’re going to be one of the ones that refuse to have the microchip implanted under the skin on your forehead when it comes to that aren’t you?

      • Jarflax

        I want mine in the top joint of my left pinky finger. I promise I have no intention of making a Yakuza apology.

    • Winston

      Need some arguments over the merits/demerits of government recognition of gender identity….

    • Pope Jimbo

      Think of how much fun you would have traveling to enlightened countries (like the Middle East) with that super special snow flake gender designation. I’d bet the Saudis would roll out the rich carpet for the brave man who identifies as a woman.

    • Gustave Lytton

      As if “X” (unspecified) will satiate those clamoring for this.

      And I’m sure this will never be an issue entering other countries…

      • Mojeaux

        These people are narcissistic egomaniac drama queens.

        NOTHING will make them happy but constant adulation.

      • Q Continuum

        I argue that even constant adulation wouldn’t sate them. They get their dopamine from being a victim; I’m not even going to speculate on the psychopathology of requiring the feeling of oppression to experience pleasure, but I’m pretty sure it’s crippling.

        Even if they received the constant adulation they think they want, they’d shift the goalposts again to reclaim victimhood.

        The only appropriate response is merciless mockery followed by “Shut the fuck up you freak.”

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I actually feel bad for them because they’re damaged for the most part but that doesn’t mean they should be coddled. We don’t indulge schizophrenics who think they’re Napoleon even though they’re demonstrably not and we shouldn’t indulge them.

  31. Winston

    It is an experiment designed to answer the eternal question: are straight people OK?

    It is an experiment designed to answer the eternal question: are straight people OK?

      • Chipwooder

        A)Reality shows are fucking idiotic
        B)Guardian articles are worse

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Yes, we all know that the full LGBTQ+ spectrum is inherently more emotionally stable than cishets.

      I’ll bet this writer weighed in on the recent BBC tradwife controversy with some Nazi epithets..

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Uh, what kind of BBC was that?

    • Q Continuum

      Destruction of the family was and is a key component of Marxist revolution.

    • Rhywun

      “Unbearably heterosexual”

      You poor dear.

      • Sensei

        Rhywun – I don’t know how do you put up with most Glibs…

    • Jarflax

      Did she boil it?

    • SDF-7
      • Rhywun

        chonky

    • Q Continuum

      As cartoonish as she is, not saying I wouldn’t wanna take a ride on her.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Yep, but she is definitely a hobbit, dude.

  32. Rebel Scum

    Racist.

    Omar is being challenged by at least eight candidates, and one of them — a foreign-born refugee from Iraq — had a simple, elegant response to her identity crisis.

    “I am an American,” wrote Republican Dalia al-Aqidi, a former Iraqi refugee who hopes to replace Omar in representing Minnesota’s 5th Congressional District.

    “That’s why I’m running for Congress,” al-Aqidi added. …

    “As an American citizen, my duty is to defend my country and my duty is to stand up to her hatred and racism that she’s spreading within her community, within the country, and even worldwide,” al-Aqidi said. “Ilhan Omar is harming every American with her hatred, her standing against what we believe in, [and] against our own Constitution.” …

    “I came to the U.S. more than 25 years ago. So, basically, I’m not a refugee anymore. I’m not an Iraqi anymore. I’m an American. Period,” she said on “Fox & Friends.”

    Not even with a hyphen? Total. Bigot.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Some new Omar allegations that even I hadn’t heard of before.

      Special counsel Robert Mueller’s mandate defined “collusion” as “links and/or coordination” with foreign powers. Democrats and their media allies tried and failed to hang the charge around President Trump’s neck. But one of their own darlings, Rep. Ilhan Omar, has inarguably colluded with an unsavory Islamist regime: Turkey’s.

  33. Tundra

    I really like Sharipova and will miss her. Quite a good essay, too!

    I haven’t listened to Robyn Hitchcock in ages. I will rectify that this afternoon.

    Thanks, SF!

    • Chipwooder

      She has sensational legs

      • Q Continuum

        If she had DDs, she would asymptotically approach perfection.

      • Tundra

        Yes. And I’m happy to read that she intends to keep them that way!

    • Winston

      Modern Communications was supposed to make us free…

      • Q Continuum

        Nothing makes us free. Slavery is the default human condition.

      • Winston

        Modern Communications was supposed to be filled with libertarians agitating for libertarian goals.

      • Q Continuum

        It might be, but libertarians, and people who don’t want to be slaves in general, are vastly outnumbered.

      • Jarflax

        No it wasn’t. It wan’t ‘supposed’ to do anything because it evolved organically and is not a single thing with a single origin. Individual components were invented, generally to make money for the inventors, but possibly in some cases out of a desire to improve communications, but I doubt you can find any inventor who specifically claimed his invention would make us free.

      • Winston

        Read what I posted from James Mill below. And don’t deny that libertarian embrace of the internet hoped that Twitter and Facebook would be full of libertarians complaining about every government action which would convince the pols to become libertarian to save their hides.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Declaration_of_the_Independence_of_Cyberspace

        Governments of the Industrial World, you weary giants of flesh and steel, I come from Cyberspace, the new home of Mind. On behalf of the future, I ask you of the past to leave us alone. You are not welcome among us. You have no sovereignty where we gather.

      • Jarflax

        And what part of the internet did he invent?

      • Jarflax

        And what I am denying is that taking comments someone made and then acting as though you were defrauded because they were not entirely correct makes sense.

        Many many things have been said, most of them were not entirely correct. In the case you are focussed on, the comments aren’t even that far off. There is no doubt that the internet has made it more possible for individuals to communicate their thoughts. Do you think Asange and Snowden could have let the world know the extent of the Government spying before the internet? The fact that it didn’t magically destroy all barriers to freedome and destroy over reaching Government doesn’t devalue what it did do. You seem to have trouble accepting the idea that things happen incrementally and are not guaranteed to happen.

      • Winston

        You seem to have trouble accepting the idea that things happen incrementally and are not guaranteed to happen.

        Actually I am critical of all those who think stuff is guaranteed to happen.

      • Ted S.

        We know, because you won’t. fucking. shut. up. about. it.

      • Shirley Knott

        Jarflax, I agree.
        There’s something about any imputation of plans, of “it was supposed to”, that suggest the same ‘men of system’ approaches that we argue against when it pops up in economics. But it happens in culture, too. You don’t plan it, you don’t predict it’s effects, much better than random guessing.
        Read 70s and 80s dystopian science fiction and look at all they got wrong. Wrong both in terms of missed new technologies that in retrospect should have been obvious, but also what they kept.

      • Jarflax

        Exactly, you want to decide what event X meant? Wait 500 years and MAYBE you can evaluate it accurately. Out of evil can come good and out of good can come evil. All of us tend to wax overly optimistic about things we like and overly pessimistic about things we dislike. I absolutely include myself in this criticism btw, I look at things and see the “fall of Rome’ presaged in every idiot left wing program. Yet, in many areas we are more free and much more prosperous than when I was growing up. On the other hand we are less free in other ways. Who knows what will happen next? In 1980 was anyone seriously predicting taht the US would become a net fuel exporter? and that oil prices would drop so low that major oil based economies would collapse?

    • Drake

      the Milwaukee campus of Molson Coors

      Where I should have gone to college.

  34. Winston

    https://mises.org/library/james-mill-and-libertarian-class-analysis
    Rothbard on James Mill

    Granted that the people would displace aristocratic rule, did Mill have any reason for thinking that the people would then exert their will on behalf of laissez-faire? Yes, and here his reasoning was ingenious: while the ruling class had the fruits of their exploitative rule in common, the people were a different kind of class: their only interest in common was getting rid of the rule of special privilege. Apart from that, the mass of the people have no common class interest that they could ever actively pursue by means of the state. Furthermore, this interest in eliminating special privilege is the common interest of all, and is therefore the “public interest” as opposed to the special or sinister interests of the few. The interest of the people coincides with universal interest and with laissez-faire and liberty for all.

    Interesting how modern libertarian really isn’t different from Mill on this aspect: once we move into cities we will be free of aristocracy and support laissez faire since only rural landowners support statism. Free Trade will make us libertarian since big government will be able to put up tariffs. Technology will make us libertarian since big government will be able to privilege certain corporations.

    But how then explain that no one can claim that the masses have always championed laissez-faire? — and that the masses have all too often loyally supported the exploitative rule of the few? Clearly, because the people, in this complex field of government and public policy, have suffered from what the Marxists would later call “false consciousness,” an ignorance of where their interests truly lie. It was then up to the intellectual vanguard, to Mill and his philosophic radicals, to educate and organize the masses so that their consciousness would become correct and they would then exert their irresistible strength to bring about their own democratic rule and install laissez-faire. Even if we can accept this general argument, the Millian radicals were unfortunately highly overoptimistic about the time span for such consciousness-raising, and political setbacks in the early 1840s led to their disillusionment in radical politics and to the rapid disintegration of the radical movement.

    Ah, there is that need for education again.

  35. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda, when you’ve lost Jennifer Rubin you’ve lost the race.

    I say this as someone who thinks Klobuchar’s pragmatic politics is precisely the right formula for her party and the country. I have found her spunky debate performances impressive. But voters are saying she is not their top pick — or even their second, third, fourth or fifth in virtually all states. She has run a spirited race, but continuing on at this rate will only diminish her brand and help elect a candidate she has pointed out is exactly the wrong person to defeat Trump. Those close to her need to deliver some tough love.

    Why is it that the supposed token conservative on WaPo’s payroll is so worried about the Dems?

    • Jarflax

      Has Rubin ever said anything remotely conservative?

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        She was in the tank for the Republicans during Bush 2’s presidency. She was unreadable then too.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Ironically, The Intercept is running a story that should bolster Special K’s creds with moderates, but will absolutely sink her with the Dem primary voters.

      The story details a couple instances in which some judge tried to go easy on an immigrant so that they wouldn’t face deportation, but then Special K (as County Attorney) got involved and got the immigrants well and truly fucked.

      One case, I might be sympathetic to (guy got rung up on MJ charges), but the other case was an immigrant who was defrauding the welfare system. I’m pretty much sympathetic to more immigration, but if you come here and start working the welfare system I don’t have much time to cry when you get deported.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      No one will heed her advice anyway, outside of the Bill Krystol and Max Boot types she’s loathed by all.

  36. Juvenile Bluster

    Anyone taking bets on how Trump’s going to beclown himself at his CDC press conference?

    • Q Continuum

      “We have this under control bigly. No international travel and definitely no entry for the slants. We’re gonna build a big beautiful pile of antibiotics and China will pay for it.”

    • creech

      He’s going to say he’s heard great things about Cuba’s medical system and he wants to enlist their doctors in the fight against coronavirus?

    • Gustave Lytton

      It would take having visible signs of Covid-19 infection during the press conference to top the Iranians.

    • Gadfly

      I would not bet on that. Trump can be boringly presidential when he feels like it (infrequent as it may be), and discussing the coronavirus in a formalized setting feels like it might be one of those times. But you never know, and I guess that’s where betting can be fun, betting on something unpredictable. But I prefer a sure thing.

    • kbolino

      Maybe he’ll crack a joke about Elizabeth Warren’s family history with smallpox.

    • Drake

      20 Years ago, she was the clown-far-left of the party.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’d imagine her district is collectively orgasming over the prospect of a Sanders candidacy. She needs to get in line with that fact.

      • Jarflax

        The progressives always think they are riding the tiger to victory, but in the end the tiger always wins.

    • Winston

      So much for “Pelosi and Schumer will rein in Sanders”.

      I recall similar arguments about McGovern in 1972.

    • B.P.

      Perhaps she doesn’t want some molotov cocktail-chucking street Bolshevik to burn her estate down.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Pressing business

    Lawmakers took a historic vote on Wednesday when the House of Representatives passed legislation to make lynching a federal crime.
    The House passed HR 35, anti-lynching legislation introduced by Democratic Rep. Bobby Rush of Illinois, called the Emmett Till Antilynching Act. Fourteen-year-old Till was brutally murdered in a racist attack in Mississippi in 1955, an event that drew national attention to the atrocities and violence that African Americans have faced in the United States and became a civil rights rallying cry.
    The measure passed with broad, bipartisan support in a 410-4 vote. Independent Rep. Justin Amash voted against the bill along with three Republicans: Thomas Massie, Ted Yoho, and Louie Gohmert.
    Yoho told CNN that he voted against the measure because the bill is an “overreach of the federal government” and tramples on state’s rights.

    House Speaker Nancy Pelosi spoke on the floor ahead of the vote in support of the measure, saying, “Today Congress has an opportunity to acknowledge its responsibility for its historic failure to confront and end the horror of lynching in America.”

    Next up- charge Public Enemy Number One.

    • Winston

      I’m sure libertarianism.org is happy.

      Also how do they define “lynching”?

      And doesn’t Nancy really mean “Democrats” since they were the ones who opposed it?

    • Gustave Lytton

      It’s about time. Murder wasn’t illegal in this country until now.

      Also, fuck states’ rights. They have powers. People have rights.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      So, and I’m guessing this is the reasoning behind Amash and Massie’s “No” votes, how is this within the purview of things the feds are allowed to regulate under the constitution (yeah, yeah, I know, interstate commerce)?

      Also, is this really a problem? Murder’s illegal everywhere, far as I know. Is there an epedemic of people being lynched and not being charged in modern America?

      • Jarflax

        Oh for crying out loud. Seriously? Maybe next week they can pass a law against the Atlantic Slave Trade?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        In Trump’s Amerikkka, there are roving lynch gangs everywhere. Are you living under a rock?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Seems like this would be covered under murder one.

      • Rhywun

        But making it a federal crime tells everyone we’re super-serious about stamping it out.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Why do you hate AUSAs?

        They need dead bodies to stand on too!

    • kbolino

      Congress, tackling the pressing political issues of 1955 in 2020.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    The Senate bill, called the Justice for Victims of Lynching Act, makes lynching a federal crime by establishing it as a new criminal civil rights violation. The legislation would amend federal civil rights law to explicitly include provisions on lynching.
    It passed the Senate last year by a unanimous vote and was sponsored by the Senate’s three black members: Democratic Sen. Kamala Harris of California, Democratic Sen. Cory Booker of New Jersey and Republican Sen. Tim Scott of South Carolina.
    A senior Democratic aide told CNN on Monday that the House bill would be amended to carry the language of the Senate bill, but would keep the House’s title in honor of Till.
    Since the bills still have different titles and numbers, additional action will be necessary in one of the two chambers before the legislation can go to the President’s desk, and the Senate is expected to next take up the House-passed legislation.

    Golly, I wonder what sort of easter eggs they’ll plant in it during reconciliation.

    • Winston

      I would like to point out that end-runs around Double Jeopardy were created thanks to concerns about lynching and racist cops. Food for thought.

      Oh and Posse Comitatus was passed by disgruntled Confederates after Reconstruction…

      • leon

        I don’t have a problem with Posse Comitatus. The military should not have any law enforcement job.

    • Q Continuum

      Broad bipartisan support for making being mean to kittens a Federal Crime!

      What cooperation!

      • Q Continuum

        And BTW: when was the last time someone was legitimately lynched in the way they’re suggesting?

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Probably James Byrd in ’98. And the killers got away with it because there was no federal law.

        Oh, wait, of the three people involved, all were convicted of murder, two were sentenced to death (and have since been executed) and one to LWOP.

        Before that it was probably in the mid 1960s.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        1981

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Yeah, was about to come in and say I’d researched it and found the previous one was in 1981 (three people involved, all convicted of murder, two serving life in prison and one executed).

        Before that, it was 1975 (a Polish Jew, murdered by black teenagers who wanted a white victim).

        Before that, it was 1964.

      • Viking1865

        Oh, wait, of the three people involved, all were convicted of murder, two were sentenced to death (and have since been executed) and one to LWOP.

        But only because he was killed in a blue state. If he had been killed in a red state, like Texas, all those good old boy sheriffs and prosecutors would have thrown them a parade and given them the key to the city.

      • Count Potato

        Jussie Smollett?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Ironically he did get away with it on a local level due to political interference.

    • Drake

      Funny, the only people likely to get lynched these days are politicians.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Lynchings have gone high tech since 1991.

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Which explains the timing of the law. They expect to steal the presidential election and of course Trump supporters will act violently

    • Urthona

      Idiots. I’m running on a pro-lunching platform.

  39. Winston

    So will “lynching” be so broadly defined to mean any sort violence between people of different races?

    • Jarflax

      No, the direction of the violence will be determinative.

      • Drake

        Yes – but calling names and making faces will be considered lynching.

      • Winston

        Well, I just assumed that…

  40. AlmightyJB

    So what does he have in place of the vagina?

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Nothing? Like a Ken doll?

  41. Mojeaux

    Lots of things going on with Mr Mojeaux’s lungs, most chronic and one acute infection, so heavy antibiotics. Will have to see a pulmonologist ASAP to find out what’s going on. Not cancer.

    • Tundra

      Yikes. No history of pneumonia, etc?

      Good luck, Mo.

    • Mojeaux

      Check that. He’s been dx’d with pneumonia as the acute thingie. Still don’t know what tje chronic thing is.

      • Shirley Knott

        Sorry. Best wishes for rapid positive resolutions!

    • AlmightyJB

      That sucks. Hopefully the antibiotics knocks out that infection.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Sorry. Good luck.

    • Spudalicious

      Geez Mojeaux, you don’t need another plate in the air.

      • Mojeaux

        Well for the most part Mr Mojeaux can take care of his own business (except his back hurts too much to drive right now) and infection is transient, so this is kind of low on my totem pole.

    • Cannoli

      Hope he has a speedy recovery!

    • Mojeaux

      Thanks for the good wishes all. The ER was a hoot and I got to tell my “It just slipped in. Twice.” story.

    • Gender Traitor

      Not cancer.

      Whew! Pardon me for being dense, but are they keeping him at least overnight? And most important, have they given him enough good stuff that he’s comfortable?

      • Mojeaux

        No, he’s home. They might have kept him just to get the pulmonologist on call (I got the sense that was what the doc WANTED to do), but the hospital is at max capacity. He’s going to see the specialist tomorrow (I think).

        In other news, XX TD has her first real shift at Walmart today. She was excited, but we’ll see how she comes home after 4 hours solid on her feet. She did want to stay until 10:45 (that’s the limit for minors), but I capped her at 9:00. She needs to get used to it before pulling almost 7-hour shifts.

        And lastly, I am told sriracha does not belong in orange chicken.

      • Mojeaux

        Let me clarify: She had training at Walmart today, which was going to be about 20 minutes, but her boss said she could stay and work as long as she wanted until 10:45.

        It’s not like she can just waltz in and out whenever she feels like it. She doesn’t have set shifts yet.

      • Rhywun

        I remember pulling 40 hour weeks in my mom’s office during HS summer breaks – those days were sooooo long OMG.

      • Mojeaux

        Yeah, I was working 40-hour weeks in the summer at 16 or 17, I can’t remember. I had a small stint at a restaurant but that killed me. I could not stand on my feet that long.

      • Rhywun

        At least I got to sit on my ass all day.

        But yeah, in my 20s I was doing 40 hours on my feet and hoo-boy it got rough, especially since it was mostly standing in one spot.

      • Gender Traitor

        Glad to hear he’s home! Hope he can indeed see that specialist pronto.

        In other – and completely inconsequential – news, I finally got my Valentine’s Day gift from Mr. GT. (It arrived today from China and has been, I’m assured, sanitized for my protection.) It’s a simple, plain gold-colored bangle bracelet, but engraved on the inside…

        I thought you would appreciate the sentiment. : )

      • Mojeaux

        OMG ??????

      • Tundra

        That’s solid.

      • Tulip

        No sriracha . Use red pepper flakes

      • Mojeaux

        The recipe I was shopping with said sriracha AND red pepper flakes.

      • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

        Orange chicken requires sublimity, not a nut-punch. Cayenne, Aleppo pepper flakes, or some mild Indian pepper flakes, or even some Italian flakes, will work wonders. I’ve also used Korean pepper flakes with success. The trick is to use a light hand when adding the heat. The other trick? The less “character” the peppers have, the better (that makes cayenne, the “tofu” of pepper flakes, possibly the preferred choice for this recipe). You need some heat, but no distractions from the orange. Once you’ve dialed the basic recipe in, GO NUTS!  ;-)

        A great modification? Make orange beef. Oh. Em. Gee.

    • Count Potato

      I hope he gets well soon. I’ll say a prayer for him.

      • Mojeaux

        Thanks, Count!

    • gbob

      Mo! Dumb to say, but you have my prayers.

      • Mojeaux

        It’s not dumb to say, and we will take all the prayers we can get.

  42. Tundra

    Back to Robyn Hitchcock ,his album Eye was released by my hometown’s own Twin/Tone Records.

    Yes, I know you DGAF, but do listen to the record. It’s quite good.

    • Rhywun

      I have Globe of Frogs somewhere. Good stuff.

      • Tundra

        Oh man, that brings back memories. A college girlfriend was really into RH and that was her favorite song.

        I haven’t thought about her in a long time. A Q-girl from Wisconsin. Awesome.

        Thanks, Rhy!

  43. Spudalicious

    Four hours in California and we’re ready to head back home.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      Your patience is commendable. The last time I flew into LAX, I wanted to nuke the Greater Los Angeles Basin by the time I’d driven out of the airport.

      • Spudalicious

        There were some moments driving through Sacramento that a tactical nuke might have been considered, and that wasn’t even rush hour.

      • Mojeaux

        Isn’t California just one long traffic jam from Sacramento to San Diego?

      • Drake

        All the money they were going to spend on wider highways was spent instead on an imaginary train.

      • Jarflax

        The last time I was in LA I was with someone who was giving a talk there on a Weds. and then giving it in Vegas on the following Saturday, so we rented a car and drove. I love road trips but driving out of LA the scenery seeems to consist of hours of endless ranch houses sitting on scrub lots. It got so that I was rooting for a new builder to have built the next 20 mile wide subdivision. just so the scenery would change from red roofs to green.

      • Mojeaux

        That is exactly how I remember thebdrive from LA to San Diego. Throw in road construction.

    • We're not saying BEAM's an alien, but . . .

      That elephant gets it.

    • pistoffnick

      My commute is 20 minutes one way. I have to rage quite my favorite radio station about twice a day when a Bloomberg commercial comes on.

      Sometimes democracy is a birthright
      Sometimes it’s a gift.
      And sometimes it’s a fight.

      FUCK YOU MIKE!

      • The Hyperbole

        handle checks out.

      • Tundra

        It’s now changed to tailor it to the station.

        Hello KFAN listeners.
        Do you feel like the blahblahblah…

        FUCK OFF MIKE!

    • Gender Traitor

      Am I being naive to think that Bloomer’s carpet bombing ad campaign is likely to backfire because even normies will get so f’ing sick of them that they’ll vote a collective “HELL to the no”?

      • The Hyperbole

        Yes, normies don’t pay attention to ads.

  44. JD is Unemployed

    I’m watching Romesh Ponnuru interview Ivanka about paid family leave. She is obviously very intelligent and well-prepared in making her arguments in support of it, and it strikes me as a sign of the times that this is an issue being argued most articulately from a conservative platform.

    As someone who calls himself a libertarian it seems pretty difficult to move away from my principled position of “FUCK YOU, CUT SPENDING!”, which I feel is the only feasible option, but I’m British so what do I care?

    Ivanka seems like the more intelligent and articulate ’90s Dem presidential candidate that never existed.

    • JD is Unemployed

      Ps – Perhaps my beautifully nuanced style of understatement is too subtle for Glibs, so just to remove any doubt, let me restate in no uncertain terms for the record, FUCK YOU, CUT SPENDING.

    • Rhywun

      It’s not a spending issue, it’s a regulation issue, innit?

      • JD is Unemployed

        Yeah, but where does the money come from? I’m certain it would never pass in the house without some provision for federal subsidies (not just tax relief) to cover it. I’m way off?

      • Rhywun

        I dunno but I’ve never heard of such plans presented with an accompanying subsidy. My understanding is that the cost will be passed to the consumer.

      • JD is Unemployed

        You’re right. I’m way off base on this, not that I agree with it either way. I’m just wrong in thinking it would go that way. I get some silly ideas sometimes.

      • RAHeinlein

        Sen. Joni presented a plan using SS to pay – if you use the leave, delay SS by the same amount of time.

      • The Hyperbole

        Plus since the Gov’t is the largest employer any regulation that costs employers money…

    • Tundra

      Paid family leave should be determined only by individual companies (duh).

      Ivanka is hot, but she knows shit about small business. It would kill us.

      Which is why hiring a newly married, late 20s chick is gonna scare the shit out out of a lot of small companies.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Unintended consequences are a drag.

      • JD is Unemployed

        Yeah. I’d guess we’re all on the same page regarding this, as a matter of principle. I suppose what struck me more was not the subject of the arguments but the fact that I was hearing someone speak articulately in support of socialist/paternalistic policy, which I don’t recall hearing in a long time, the Democratic party being what it is now and all.

      • Viking1865

        I’ve given the matter precisely zero thought and even less actual data analysis, but what about allowing parents to deduct time missed off their taxes? If a new mom has six weeks leave through work, and decides to take another two months, then the family only pays 5/6ths of the taxes due that year?

        Standard Libertarian Disclaimer here, but if we’re going to have a tax policy that isn’t a head tax or a poll tax or an excise tax, it should be a policy which encourages the formation of productive families, rather than subsidizing bastard children.