Wednesday Morning Links

by | Feb 5, 2020 | Daily Links | 471 comments

You shall not pass! (Even though there’s a guy open in the corner)

Wow, what an interesting day yesterday was.  The Buckeyes went north and finally beat a team with a pulse. It had been over a month since that happened.  The Dodgers made a blockbuster trade to get Mookie Betts.  Liverpool advanced in the FA Cup with their youngest team ever after an incredible header from 18 yards out. (Yeah, I know…that’s a tough way to go out for Shrewsbury) And Mark Dantonio abruptly resigned as football coach at Michigan State. And your hockey winners were Boston, Colorado, Tampa, Montreal, NYI, Washington, Columbus, Anaheim, St Louis, the MINNESOOOODA WIIIIILD, Nashville, San Jose and Phoenix.

Cocaine crack is a hell of a drug.

The big birthdays today are writer William S Burroughs, physicist Robert Hofstadter, comedian Red Buttons, legendary hockey commentator Don Cherry, home run king Hank Aaron, football’s Roger Staubach, Atari founder Nolan Bushnell, decent driver but annoying announcer Darrell Waltrip, hilarious actor Christopher Guest, Hollywood’s Jennifer Jason Leigh, bassist Duff McKagan, crack-smoker Bobby Brown, soccer legends Christiano Ronaldo and Neymar, and British politician Jo Swinson.

Alright, on to…the links.

A national hero

The State Of The Union was last night, and it was a political masterclass. There’s no other way to put it.  Love him, hate him, or be indifferent to him, he absolutely nailed it.  And that doesn’t seem to be sitting well with the Dem leadership. I wonder if tat was really the speech Nancy tore up last night or just an extensive bar tab she was finally made aware of.

The Iowa Caucuses early results, which is an odd way to put it 36 hours after it ended, show Mayor Pete and Bernie Sanders locked in a tussle. Of course, it’ll probably still be days before the Dems get their shit figured out.  Hell, they can’t even properly rig a coin toss.

The impeachment vote is today. And Senators plan on taking a long weekend once it’s done.

Hey wait, I thought it was all global warming’s fault. And by “global warming’s”, I mean Trump’s.

Here’s a bonus tweet for you to laugh at. Jesus, that kid is retarded AF.

Expect more of this, California farmers.

Just what Californian’s needed: more top-down stupidity from Sacramento. God forbid you’d honor the water rights people have based on acreage.

If you thought gamers were lazy, basement-dwellers, you’re wrong.  It turns out they’re very active and resourceful.

And here you go. Enjoy.

That’s it. Have a great day, friends!

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

471 Comments

  1. Rufus the Monocled

    !

      • banginglc1

        ?

      • Gadfly

        For a second I was wondering why no GIF has been posted yet, then I realized it’s a UCS post. I think I’ve developed a Pavlovian response where I expect a solitary period to be replaced by an image.

      • SDF-7

        There’s a joke about a introverted woman once a month there somewhere…

  2. Rufus the Monocled

    Australia fires. It was the bee keeper all along!

    • Count Potato

      Didn’t they arrest around 200 people?

      • Tejicano

        Proof that climate crisis is man-made!!!

    • Fourscore

      “Beekeeper blamed”

      Its always the bee keeper, isn’t it? I can relate to the problem, we have had tiny flareups but we could stomp them out with out feet. Easy for it to happen and easy to prevent.

      • Aloysious

        Thanks for that. Precisely what I was thinking about.

      • Sean

        ??

      • egould310

        “But that’s a priceless Steinway!”

        “Not anymore.”

  3. Count Potato

    “A majority of the people that live in the United States are the descendants of illegal colonizers that committed a mass genocide.”

    So is he for immigration or not?

    • UnCivilServant

      I don’t know, maybe he believes the noble savage myth and doesn’t realize humans are not new world critters.

    • robc

      Illegal? Did they have a flag?

      • R C Dean

        What law did they break, Gauleiter Hogg?

      • UnCivilServant

        They left their lords’ domains instead of reverting to serfdom.

      • leon

        Cortez did violate the orders of the Governor in landing in Mexico…

      • UnCivilServant

        Most of us have no relation to Hernan.

        And the Aztecs were no saints either.

      • leon

        Given enough time, you are either related to someone, from the past, or they have no extant decedents.

      • UnCivilServant

        It was either 40 or 60% of all men who’ve ever lived lack current descendants.

      • Brett L

        60 is probably low, not high. The way I heard it was, “statistically, every woman who ever lived had a child, but only about one man in ten.”

        The statistically refers to DNA families. If your mother had two children and her sister had none, that’s statistically the same as if each sister had one. OTOH, if you have 3 half-siblings by 3 different women among the 4 of you, that’s 2 men that didn’t breed. Extrapolate that over 3-4 generations and you get to 1 in 10.

      • sloopyinca

        And then there’s me, wrecking the numbers with all my breeding.

      • Chipwooder

        None of the tribes were. They were constantly fighting extremely brutal wars against each other, and many of them were aggressively expansionist. I used the example of the Comanche below because they started out up around Wyoming and, over time, moved further and further south, annihilating several tribes and pushing out others along the way.

      • Naptown Bill

        ^This. Even if you don’t look at the archaeological or historical records, why exactly do these clowns think all of the indigenous American tribal cultures had some sort of warrior class or martial tradition? What did they think the hatchets and clubs were for? I guess when the American Indians killed each other over territory it was authentic and artisanal or something.

      • pan fried wylie

        Artisanal murder…hmmm.

        “Step right up, 50%-off, fresh, handcrafted artisanal suicide, don’t disappoint the wife and kids your non-binary roomates-of-color, bring some home today!”

      • The Last American Hero

        Sandy is related to the conquistador. She even has his last name.

      • robc

        thatsthejoke.jpg

  4. UnCivilServant

    Mister Hogg, I and a goodly number of my fellow countrymen are descended from Irish potato farmers who were kicked around by everyone from the vikings to the english to their own neighbors and who came over here because they were starving back home.

    Go farm potatos sometime.

    • sloopyinca

      He has no eye for that.

      • Not Adahn

        I understand that her’s grating, but you’ve got to remember he’s just a wee tot.

      • Tejicano

        I bet that if he did try potato farming he wouldn’t find it very a-peeling

      • Fourscore

        But he’d have a hill to stand on.

      • pistoffnick

        Yeah but he has a chip on his shoulder.

      • bacon-magic

        He’s got a chip on his shoulder.

      • Slammer

        That kid’s a wannabe dictater

      • Plisade

        That’s a loaded statement.

      • sloopyinca

        No, he’s half-baked.

      • The Last American Hero

        He should marry Greta. They could be a watermelon power couple.

      • Shirley Knott

        Is that like the potato clock?

    • leon

      Well according to BBC, Not even Ireland, belongs to the Irish….

    • Naptown Bill

      That’s 1/4 or so of my background, too. Also a great-grandfather who came here legally from Kilmarnock around the turn of the 20th century. On my dad’s side? More lowland Scots and some slave-holding Englishmen. In fact, there are a surprising number of African-Americans who share my last name, and not because my family was especially progressive in the 19th and 18th centuries. But last I checked, I’m a citizen, as were all of my ancestors as of the time there was a country of which to be a citizen. So Hogg can shove it up his ass.

      • leon

        WRONG! Not only did your family commit Genocide on this continent. They did it in Africa, and in Europe. Only the Sami and the Basque are Native to Europe. All other Europeans are invaders.

      • UnCivilServant

        LIES! Only the Neanderthal are native to Europe. All you Sapiens are invaders!

      • leon

        If you aren’t from East Africa you are a genocidal colonizer.

      • UnCivilServant

        In that case, no guilt, no regrets.

        *hums merrily*

      • Nephilium

        Let’s see… I’m part potato famine Irish, Eastern Europeans fleeing after WW1, and Germanic Swiss who came over here to make their fortune.

      • The Last American Hero

        You were so close, but fencing that Nazi Gold put you on the list.

        Sorry.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Go farm potatos sometime

      Um, you didn’t cultivate those potatoes. The lowly potato was one of the things that those shitlord colonizers brought back from the New World. STOLEN!

      • leon

        So you’re saying that the Irish Potato Famine was actually a genocide perpetrated by Native Americans on the Irish?

      • Not Adahn

        Of course not. Genocide is privilege + power. Native Americans are incapable of genocide, just like the African Americans in Rwanda.

      • Brett L

        Errm. I didn’t realize there were large numbers of Americans participating in that.

    • gbob

      Plus he needs to repent for the sins of his ancestor in Hazzard County where he harrassed the poor Duke boys.

      • UnCivilServant

        After Uncle Jessie suggested the EPA use ethanol instead of gasoline, I can forgive any attempt to reincarcerate those criminals.

    • Count Potato

      LOL

  5. Slammer

    Someone need to rip the Articles of Impeachment in half after Trump’s acquittal today

  6. Not Adahn

    According to NPR, African Americans all hate Trump now because he gave a medal to a racist last night.

      • Not Adahn

        No idea. I went to bed, confident in the knowledge that the Glibertariat would enact my labor for me and select the most entertaining parts. Which Slammer has!

  7. Rebel Scum

    And that doesn’t seem to be sitting well with the Dem leadership.

    Speaking of degrading the office…

  8. Idle Hands

    What a rough week for the dems.

    • Slammer

      It gets rougher

  9. Rebel Scum

    show Mayor Pete and Bernie Sanders locked in a tussle

    Butt-edge-edge is an a-hole but he is really the guy I’d expect Team Blue to choose.

    • sloopyinca

      After the last two days of the Iowa fiasco, don’t expect them to let their voters choose anybody.

      • hayeksplosives

        This.

        But who is really operating the levers of power in the DNC now?

      • The Last American Hero

        Not James Carville, based on his rant the other day.

    • Not Adahn

      Is he a Millennial? They’re the most important demo after all.

      • The Last American Hero

        Anybody who chooses to identify as a millennial is a millennial.

        Not joking. In my office, there is a young advisory team. The requirements to join are be a millennial. And the above is how they define millennial.

      • Homple

        How very millennial of them.

      • pan fried wylie

        Next you’re going to complain about how there’s no white people on the diversity advisory team.

    • Agent Cooper

      Biden is still viable because Mayor Pete will get clobbered in South Carolina.

  10. Slammer

    Mayor Pete and Bernie Sanders locked in a tussle

    Sounds kinda gay

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Park told Storyful the voter had originally voted for Amy Klobuchar. When she learned Klobuchar was no longer viable at the caucus center, she opted for Buttigieg.

        After learning he is gay, she changed her vote to Elizabeth Warren, Park said.

        Wait till she finds out she was mislead about one particular parameter of Warren’s demographic information…

      • Enough About Palin

        I saw his speech after the partial results were in and right off the bat he played the twink cad.

      • Enough About Palin

        card

      • R C Dean

        Yup. A plant. His plan is to up his intersectional cred to overcome his lily-whiteness with the Dem’s SJW base. The Dems desperately want not-a-white-male, but all their minority candidates have failed. He wants to tap into that, but to do so he has to be an oppressed-minority even though he is a white male. So, Gay Pete the Democrat it is.

  11. Count Potato

    “Sanders had 31,322 caucus attendees casting their lot with him in the first round of vote allocation and 32,673 in the second round. Buttigieg’s totals were 27,418 then 31,353; ”

    So you are saying Sanders won the popular vote?

    • Not Adahn

      That is literallyMara Liasson’s take.

    • Slammer

      In the name of fairness some Bernie’s votes were redistributed

      • straffinrun

        “I’m a precinct captain!”

        /Ralph

      • leon

        The Dems failure to hold an election makes us a failed state?

    • R C Dean

      Yup. And B. wants the electoral college abolished and the President elected by popular vote, but is declaring victory anyway.

    • RAHeinlein

      Tinfoil hat opinion – the DNC set-up Iowa (likely with assistance of the radical wing of Iowa Dem party). No secret they want Iowa out as first, and many want to abolish electoral college.

      • Not Adahn

        Seriously, they just need to hold votes in NYC and LA, with Chicago, Detroit and SF in the reserve to break ties. Those are really the only people that matter.

  12. leon

    What’s up my Fellow Glibs!!!

    I didn’t watch the SOTU cause i havn’t watched one since i was a kid and my Dad had us watch it. Every President can go fuck themselves and drown in the Potomac for all i care. Snubbing a handshake is always bad form, but i can get why he did it. and ripping the speach is just childish. These are the people who we are supposed to revere. They all can go suck start some shotguns.

    • UnCivilServant

      I didn’t watch the state of the union because I have have.

    • sloopyinca

      It’s not really clear he snubbed her handshake. He was half-turned away from her before she even extended her hand.
      But if he did, he would have been right in doing so as she dissed the office when she announced him.

      • leon

        What did she say? Anyway it just goes to my point that these are the people who talk about how sacred the offices of high power in the federal government are. Fuck them.

      • leon

        Just after Trump ended his speech Tuesday night, Pelosi dramatically ripped up a copy of it. Asked about it as she left the chamber, she replied, “it was the courteous thing to do considering the alternatives.”

        See that isn’t extreeme or over dramatic at all. In fact she would have been justified if she had just jumped down and started hitting trump with her cane. Really she was super in control of herself.

      • straffinrun

        She should’ve ripped a map of the US. Peaceful succession. Making people who despise each live in the same union is wicked.

      • UnCivilServant

        No! I am not going to get stuck on the wrong side of that border!

      • leon

        Sorry UCS, but you have to scramble a few eggs in order to lead a gift horse to water.

      • Not Adahn

        But when all you have is a hammer, all silk purses look like a pig in a poke.

      • invisible finger

        You wannasee who else destroyed presentation notes after a political meeting?

      • Rebel Scum

        He was half-turned away from her before she even extended her hand.

        That’s what I saw as well. I think she did it where he wouldn’t see on purpose. He didn’t shake Pence’s hand either, just gave them each a copy of the speech and turned around.

        And I can’t fathom how she thought tearing the speech apart at the end would be a good look. But they (Dems) were clowns through the whole thing anyway.

      • The Last American Hero

        They just don’t get it. It’s the pussy hat thing all over again. OK, so you’ve got a President who’s a boor. You don’t retaliate by being a bigger boor. You retaliate by being the bigger person. Lowering yourself to his level or lower only makes you look like a boor and a loser.

  13. Idle Hands

    Also does anybody else find it convenient that the precinct results shown thus far are the ones that keep Biden above 15% with delegates? I have a feeling it’s going to get worse for him.

  14. leon

    Venus Used to be as Fit for life as earth

    Bullshit. I’ve seen this a few times, but it almost always is then tied to how Runaway Greenhouse gasses then caused Venus to become a hellhole. And the unstated conclusion that you are supposed to make is that Earth is in danger of becoming Venus.

    • UnCivilServant

      The air pressure on Venus is so much higher than earth, it isn’t even comperable.

      The planet was pretty much doomed to be afirery hellhole from the word go. It never got a chance to cool down to life-sustaining temperatures.

      • robc

        It needs a large moon to give it a chance.

      • Tejicano

        Oh, great. Now you’ve got Michael Moore’s attention.

      • UnCivilServant

        I think he’s actually lost some wight in recent years. Or else he’s garnered some condition where there’s too much skin on the face.

      • robc

        Interesting typo.

      • hayeksplosives

        That’s no moon…It’s a space station.

      • cyto

        One cool thing about that dense atmosphere… it refracts sunlight so much that it bends the light all the way around the planet. The night sky actually is lighted by a ring of squashed sunlight surrounding the perimeter of the horizon.

        Oh, and it is hotter than a pizza oven, hot enough to melt lead and full of sulfuric acid. So maybe don’t schedule a visit any time soon…..

  15. Rebel Scum

    Rashida Tlaib✔
    @RashidaTlaib

    I walked out of that speech. The lies, the bigotry, and the shameless bragging about taking away food stamps that people depend on to live—it was all beneath the dignity of the office he occupies. Shame on this forever impeached president.

    Lying about a claim while calling someone a liar…

    • UnCivilServant

      People got off food stamps because they didn’t need them anymore.

      • hayeksplosives

        UNPOSSIBLE!

    • Jarflax

      I am generally opposed to a two State solution to the Palestinian problem, but if she’d go back and stay there I’d support it.

      • Naptown Bill

        What about carving out a quarter acre on the West Bank with a modest but tasteful bungalow? And a flag?

      • R C Dean

        I don’t think there is any other solution that doesn’t involve the ethnic cleansing of either the Jews or the Palestinians. Making Palestine a full state adds one more failed state to the Mideast, granted, but what’s one more? How would it make things worse?

      • Jarflax

        There are plenty of Arab States for them to move to.

      • UnCivilServant

        None of which want them.

      • R C Dean

        That would be the ethnic cleansing that I referred to; the Palis aren’t going to leave voluntarily, I don’t think. The only way for the Palis and Jews to co-exist where they are is with separate states, IMO. The current stateless/wards of the “international community” status is an abject failure that cannot continue indefinitely.

      • Jarflax

        There are plenty of Palestinians ethnically that live in Israel. I am saying the professional Palestinians who live in camps pushing 3 generations after they lost can fuck right off. I’d give them 2 choices, leave or assimilate.

  16. leon

    71% is enough to extrapolate right? Do we really need everyone else reporting in? / Sanders and Buttigeiegeig Campaigns

    • Idle Hands

      No it’s not because this isn’t a standard primary.

  17. robc

    My understanding of Iowa caucus app:

    1. Take photo of results sheet
    2. submit photo via app
    3. App uses OCR to read photo and record data in database

    In theory, this should work. In reality, why? why? why would you use OCR? That is an obvious point of failure.

    • UnCivilServant

      If the results sheet was written up by the cacus staff, why not just have the same people enter the values into a simple form? It’s not going to change their ability to lie, but it does A: cost a fuckton less, and B: work.

      • Nephilium

        You have to buzzword it up. Instead say you’re using a human-digital interface to enter results in near real time in order to combine them to a snapshot of the caucus results.

      • Not Adahn

        but can you Blockchain it to the Cloud?

      • Nephilium

        I see you’re interested in the Professional version of the application!

      • Jarflax

        It’s the Democrats entering the data. The odds of pebkac are high.

      • robc

        Hell, put it in an excel spreadsheet and have 1600 or whatever of them submitted, and process them one at a time. There are literally a dozen ways better than using OCR and counting on being able to read precinct captains handwriting.

      • straffinrun

        My 11 year old could do it with her abacus.

      • Sensei

        The Iowa 早晩.

      • straffinrun

        Pun? If so, we’ll done. It’s 算盤. And tell me one of these kids couldn’t have done a better job.

      • Sensei

        わざとだ!

        でも、まだまだ。。。

      • straffinrun

        そろそろ

      • The Last American Hero

        They should bring in a Russian math professor to tabulate and present the results.

    • leon

      I’m confused as to why you would think that an App would make the process any easier.

      Hopefully this fiasco instills a high skepticism for electronic voting. Unfortunately all it will do is have people blame this on the Caucus mechanism itself. I’ve already seen some say the caucuses need to be gotten rid of because of this. Granted any voting system cannot be perfect, I would have thought the Dems would be in favor or caucuses because they allow people to vote for a second preference if their first choice is not viable.

      • robc

        You can do the latter with paper ballots and IRV.

      • leon

        Of course. I like the caucus system, there is a part that i like that you can elect a state delegate that YOU know personally. I prefer that than to just going to a booth, pulling a lever and then having the campaign/party select your delegates to represent them at the convention.

        I know that it is mostly a formality when it comes to the actual nomination process, but the delegates do more than just nominate the president, and knowing who is at the state convention gives some accountability to that too.

    • R C Dean

      Why? Well, one reason is somebody connected got paid a ton of money for a completely unnecessary and stupidly over complicated app.

      That’s probably all there is to it. The fact that “quality control” gives an opportunity to tamper with the results is unlikely to be a reason, seeing as there is an audit trail (the pix fed to the OCR) that would make it difficult without destroying the pics, which would be hard to explain away. Not that they wouldn’t, but there are better systems for tampering with votes, is all.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Bingo. This is political insider graft.

    • Tonio

      You say point of failure, they say opportunity to ensure correct results.

    • Brett L

      I mean, 1 & 2 give at least some sort of evidence chain. Presumably you get the embedded data from the phone that took the picture (location, platform, etc.) and you have a picture of a physical piece of paper. That makes “hacking” more difficult than a purely electronic entry/tabulation system. But really, have the people check the OCR numbers on their smart device and submit BOTH.

      • Brett L

        Of course, execution is key in software.

      • leon

        execution is key in software.

        My last job has a sad….

      • UnCivilServant

        Your program didn’t kill enough people?

      • Brett L

        I have the scars to prove that lesson.

    • invisible finger

      The DNC is thankful IOWA goes first and is a caucus. Iowa will forgotten in two weeks.

      The whole alleged reason for doing these primary thingies is the party was accused of running loser candidates and this would be a way of listening to the party supporters. But the DNC has now determined these party-supporting voters to be deplorables and would prefer to go back to the old-fashioned way. The party primaries are now just vote fraud practice sessions.

    • Gadfly

      In reality, why? why? why would you use OCR?

      Because you think it’s funny to have results saying that Sambers is beating Bulligag.

    • cyto

      Beyond all of that… this is 2 days later. Once you knew that the stupid app wasn’t working, is there any idiot Glib who could not have devised a system to get the counting done before the sun came up?

      I mean, come on!

      Email me the results. Text them. Set up a phone bank…. surely a Democrat Party has a phone bank? Hell, you could have had everyone in charge of every precinct jump in a car and drive in and still had the damn thing done before sunup.

      This is the dumbest thing I’ve ever seen. If they are not bodging it up to harm Sanders and Boot-edge-edge, they sure are working really hard to make it look like they are.

      Here’s the bottom line: Driving the results in to party headquarters should be your baseline for how long it takes. Anything longer than that should be inexcusable. And that can’t take more than 4 hours. The damn state isn’t that big and it is a square, so nothing is that far away. It isn’t like we are talking about Florida, where it is possible to have pont-to-point drives that take more than 12 hours. Key West to Flora-Bama is over 13 hours. You can drive from Des Moines all the way to Souix Falls South Dakota in 4 hours.

      • Plisade

        I would say that it is a small percentage of the population that can improvise, adapt and overcome, when original plans fail. In my experience, even with professional managers, the ability to – and I hate this term – “think outside the box” is rare. People get stuck in this mode of thinking that because something should work that it will, if they just keep trying. (It’s the same mindset that keeps them forever wanting to try Socialism.) Frequently I have to snap my team out of this mental trap and get them to change course when things go awry.

  18. Rebel Scum

    Stay classy.

    Rob Reiner✔
    @robreiner

    Only one thing to say about Rush Limbaugh getting a Presidential Medal if Freedom at The State of the Union: I loathe this fucking man.

    Patton Oswalt✔
    @pattonoswalt

    “I’m a Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient, man. Front me 50 pills?” — Rush to his Oxy dealer tomorrow. #SOTU

    And how much do you two give to charity?

    • sloopyinca

      Patton Oswalt✔
      @pattonoswalt
      “I’m a Presidential Medal of Freedom recipient, man. Front me 50 pills?” — Rush to his Oxy dealer tomorrow. #SOTU

      Apparently he doesn’t care for people suffering from drug addiction. Maybe if he did, his first wife wouldn’t have died from an overdose.

      • R C Dean

        If you’ve got an account, you should put that in as a reply. That’s the kind of vicious snark that Twitter is good for.

      • Chipwooder

        A few people already have.

      • sloopyinca

        Including me, last night.

      • leon

        I’m sure he would love to play the “I’m being Twitter Bullied” card.

    • Rhywun

      something cats something laser pointers

    • leon

      Incompetence knows no generational barrier.

      • cyto

        Yup.

        But one thing….

        After it blew up…. why did it take another couple of days? Is there nobody who is even an A student in high school in the room? We had much tougher problems than this at the office many, many times. And I cannot imagine taking more than 30 minutes to come up with a solution to this problem and no chance it takes more than 6 hours to complete the task.

        Off the top of my head:

        1. hand out call sheets and get the results in. Have them text the results photos as a verification measure. If you have 50 volunteers, this is done in less than an hour.

        2. Use your call center. Surely they have several available. Call out or have the precincts call in. Or both.

        3. Text everyone in charge of each precinct to email the results. Or robocall them to email the results. Total time – 30 minutes, tops. Then tallying the results might take another hour, tops.

        4. Have everyone drive in. Takes 4 hours, max, to get there. Another hour or two (max) to tabulate results.

        Any one of these would have accomplished the tally before the sun rose.

        If you couldn’t figure that out for yourself, please hire me.

        Alternately…. they didn’t want it to be counted in a timely manner because a preferred candidate was about to finish 5th, and they didn’t want that momentum spoiling a home-region primary.

      • hayeksplosives

        Yeah, but if you do a fair factual recount, how does the DNC control the outcome??!??

    • Not Adahn

      I signed the petition to make Saratoga County a 2A sanctuary. I’ve also begun buying guns from the local cop’s arms dealer in the hope he puts in a good word for me when the lists get drawn up.

    • Rhywun

      [Cuomo is] much more interested in simply pretending that _______ laws are working than he is in actually enforcing them

      This.

      The guy doesn’t have any principles whatsoever. Yeah, none of them do but he takes it to a whole new level.

  19. Rebel Scum

    Republicans pounce gloat.

    When the Republicans screw up (or even if they don’t), media is all over them blaming them for everything.

    When Democrats screw up, as they are wont to do as they did with the Iowa caucus train wreck, the story isn’t about their screw-up, it’s about how mean and evil the Republicans are for noticing it.

    CBS just proved this rule again with their coverage of the Iowa caucus debacle.

    What was the story? “Republicans gloat over Iowa caucus meltdown.”

    • leon

      :RUNS SCREAMING FROM JURY BOX:

      • hayeksplosives

        Holy crap. EYEBLEACH!!

    • Not Adahn

      How many jurors going into grand mal seizures does it take to get a mistrial?

      • straffinrun

        Y’all reacting like that means fewer clicks on the link. A proper response would be like, “Hawt!”

    • Slammer

      A jurist should say, “in the interest of fairness I’m going to have to see some naked pictures of the alleged victims”

  20. hayeksplosives

    Welp, today I go in for my surgery/biopsy. In the meantime, i’m hanging out with you lot.

    The kids (two adult stepsons and one GF) arrived yesterday at 2 AM. We’re having a lot of fun. I cooked Kashmiri Rogan Josh, and they gobbled it up.

    Good times.

    • leon

      Good Luck. Going to the Doc sucks, much less for surgery. Hope it is all good news.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Going to the Doc sucks

        This is why we need Medicare for All. HE shouldn’t have to barter sexual favors for medical care! (IT IS A RIGHT!!!!)

      • Pope Jimbo

        Oh and Good Luck with the results HE.

    • Not Adahn

      You have a husband AND a girlfriend? pics vids?

      • hayeksplosives

        Lolz. What happens in Hidden Meadows, stays in Hidden Meadows.

    • straffinrun

      Best of luck. Z

    • Slammer

      Good luck. saying a prayer

      • hayeksplosives

        Thanks. Doc says she’s almost certain it’s benign, but still orders up the removal. So I don’t know if i’ve been patted on the head and told “There, there” or what.

    • Count Potato

      Get well soon!

    • Fourscore

      Good luck with the medical stuff. Good luck with the relatives.

    • sloopyinca

      Best of luck. Please keep us posted.

    • Sensei

      Good luck!

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      My family will be praying for you

    • cyto

      My thoughts and prayers are with you as well.

      Especially because you apparently stewed up Joe Rogan’s son. That’s just nasty. I mean, where do you even find a celebrity kid to butcher and cook up? This site is so weird sometimes…..

    • Donation Not Taxation

      May health be with you.

    • Sean

      Good luck & hope it goes well.

  21. banginglc1

    https://kikn.com/today-is-national-shower-with-a-friend-day/

    National shower with a friend day!

    Does anyone else feel that shower time is me time? Unless sex is involved, and even then, shower sex is overrated. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still do it but usually it’s pretty meh.

    • Rebel Scum

      it’s pretty meh

      Having only done it once I agree with this assessment.

      • cyto

        Shower sex when you are 19 is amazing. Shower sex after 40? Much less so…..

        Well, at least so I’d imagine. My wife hates sex in any sort of water. So no pool sex, no hot tub sex, no ocean sex, no lake sex. One area we really don’t see eye to eye. My preferred location for sex is…. well… wherever I happen to be at the moment.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Can’t really blame a woman for not wanting to have sex in lake or ocean water. Or water with chlorine, I’d imagine.

      • cyto

        Hey.. not all sex involves intercourse.

        And as my orthodox jewish friend said to his wife mere hours after their first child was delivered…. “Hey.. Baby didn’t come out of your mouth. Just sayin'”

    • ChipsnSalsa

      There is a lot of chances for things to go wrong.

      • Not Adahn

        Hotel room showers helpfully have the handrails installed.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Huh? How am I supposed to have shower sex if I’m gripping hand rails with my hands?

      • Jarflax

        NOT GRIP RAIL!, JUST BRACE AGAINST RAIL. SO STEVE CAN GET PROPER MOUNTING POSITION.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      5 days a week is shower with a stranger day for me.

      • cyto

        Prison or gym… prison or gym… hmmm…. tough call…

      • cyto

        But oddly…. just visiting.

    • Enough About Palin

      I had shower-sex with a woman back in the 70’s. I was standing, she was off of he feet wrapped around me. I slipped and was able to keep us both from falling down, but severely pulled a groin muscle. Forty years later and it still hurts a bit now and again.

      • cyto

        I would tell the story about how that palates instructor from Columbia dislocated my finger that one time… but I’m a gentleman.

  22. Rebel Scum

    Maybe she’s not so bad.

    Sen. Kyrsten Sinema (D-Ariz.) was one of the only Senate Democrats to visibly give a standing ovation as President Trump in his Tuesday State of the Union address discussed the “opportunity zones” created in the GOP tax reform bill.

    Sinema stood and applauded as Trump touted the program and Sen. Tim Scott’s (R-S.C.) role in creating it, while her colleagues, Sens. Kirsten Gillibrand (D-N.Y.) and Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), remained seated next to her.

    Sinema, a centrist Senate Democrat, was threatened with censure last year by the Arizona Democratic Party, which introduced a resolution accusing her of “failing to support the tenets of the 2016 Democratic Party platform.”

    The opportunity zone program grants capital gains tax breaks to investors in designated economically distressed areas. The idea was initially put forth in standalone legislation with bipartisan support, but congressional Democrats have been increasingly critical of the program as enacted, with some saying it lacks necessary safeguards.

    It will be funny if Trump gets more Dems to switch parties.

    • R C Dean

      Sinema has been surprisingly not bad. I was expecting her to be a hard lefty Squad member, but she’s been pretty reasonable, although I don’t know if she’s ever bucked a party line vote.

      She’s even prettier in person, and off camera is smarter than she came across during the campaign. Of course, she still likely won due to voter fraud/ ballot harvesting, which is epidemic in Phoenix.

      • Chipwooder

        Her background IS pretty hard left, which is why her centrism in office has been so surprising.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Yeah, THATS OUR THING

        -Republicans

      • Fatty Bolger

        Hmm. Maybe she has aspirations to higher office. Somebody to keep an eye on.

      • R C Dean

        I hadn’t really thought about it, but she is building a record and a reputation in the Senate that would make her a tough candidate to beat. She campaigned pretty well in AZ, although she concentrated on Phoenix and didn’t get out much to the more Repub districts. McSally’s mistake was that she didn’t really campaign in Phoenix.

        And, of course, the Repubs controlling the state refuse to do anything about voter fraud, which I simply do not understand.

      • leon

        I remember the freak out when the Governor appointed McSally to the office, when she made a lot of sense being the second place winner in the last election

      • mexican sharpshooter

        The fraud probably benefitted them in the past. McCain and his crew had a hell of a stranglehold on the AZ Republican party.

    • straffinrun

      I’d take the Sinema challenge.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      “failing to support the tenets of the 2016 Democratic Party platform.”

      of which the major plank is “Orange man bad”.

      • cyto

        Funny that this has not gotten different coverage.

        They have widely reported poling out of Iowa that the number one issue on voter’s minds is “electablility”… They want a candidate that can beat Trump. That is their only issue, truth be told.

        Now, just imagine such polling about Obama or Hillary. The press would be apoplectic. And rightly so. They have a slate of candidates that is completely out of step with the electorate, and an electorate who doesn’t care because “orange man bad”. That is no way to run a country. But is is a good way to lose in a landslide.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      She won’t switch. There’s more influence to be had as a swing voter in a party line vote rather than being another team player. Its why they spend so much time worrying about how Joe Manchin will vote or conversely, Susan Collins.

  23. Rufus the Monocled

    Meanwhile in Canada, Li’l wannabe tyrant Justin is looking to license international website who operate here.

    This is incredibly worrying. And he has the perfect shit head to make it happen in Heritage Minister Steve Guilbeault – an eco-whacko who climbed the CN Tower. Notice his body language and commie lingo.

    He also dresses the part.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBdZ5ep2Q2o

    • UnCivilServant

      If Pie has taught us anything, it’s really easy to simply not serve pages to requests from a given set of countries.

      All this would do is cut canukistanis off from the internet.

      • The Last American Hero

        They do that and the next thing that happens is all 25 people that live in Manitoba are going to get on their snow machines and head for Ottawa to demand justice.

    • gbob

      I would offer to help smuggle you over the border to freedom, but we dont have milk in a bag. You probably wouldn’t be interested.

    • Agent Cooper

      Jesus. That guy looks like he’ll mug anyone anyhow anywhere. I suppose being a minister is basically the same thing.

  24. Chipwooder

    people that live in the United States are the descendants of illegal colonizers that committed a mass genocide.

    What does Piglet have against the Comanche?

    • Fourscore

      Did the Indian tribe sports teams have offensive nicknames? As in the Sioux Ranchers or Chippewa Farmers? Inquiring mind…

      • Nephilium

        Never. Forget.

        The intramural team, which included players of Native American, white, Latino, African American, and middle eastern ancestry,[3][4] adopted the name “Fighting Whites”, with an accompanying logo of a stereotypical “white man” in a suit,[5] styled after advertising art of the 1950s, as their team mascot. The character has been described as a man from the Ozzie Nelson era[6] or a “Father Knows Best white American male”.[7]

      • hayeksplosives

        What do they make of the Aussie team “All-Blacks”?

      • Raven Nation

        “Aussie team “All-Blacks””

        *reads hayek’s post. collapses from apoplexy*

      • Jarflax

        That’s a Haka an error there HE.

      • hayeksplosives

        Lolz. My bad, my bad.

      • UnCivilServant

        Not the “Fighting Whities”?

      • Nephilium

        Why note both?

        At first, the team’s T-shirts used “Fightin’ Whites” as the name of the team, but various media reports referred to the team as the “Whities” instead of “Whites”.[8] The team’s popularity skyrocketed. In response to customer demand, the team eventually began selling shirts under both names

      • Chipwooder

        Well, there’s a high school in Arizona that’s 100% Navajo whose teams are the Redskins.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    A majority of the people that live in the United States are the descendants of illegal colonizers that committed a mass genocide.

    Thank a teacher!

    • R C Dean

      Fortunately, I don’t need my credential any more, because this idiot is devaluing it as hard as he can.

      • UnCivilServant

        Credentials are overrated. We ended up passing over a number of people with advanced degrees because they couldn’t even answer basic technical questions or articulate an approach to troubleshooting.

      • leon

        On the flip side, i’ve had interviews where some of the questions were so basic, It made me wonder if the interviewer knew what he was talking about or if i overestimated what was required for the job at hand.

        Things like how to find all the XHR requests being made by a website (using the browser website inspector). Sure it’s technical, and i wouldn’t expect random joe to do it, but for the position i was interviewing for, it seemed like that would be well below baseline knowledge

      • UnCivilServant

        Oh these were even simpler than that.

        “How does a reverse proxy work? What network ports are used for web traffic? Read this script and tell me what you think it is doing.”

        And supposedly technical candidates STILL couldn’t get the answers, or even a good guess.

      • leon

        What network ports are used for web traffic?

        Yeah if they couldn’t answer that i would just stop the interview then and there….

      • Rhywun

        “It depends on how the application is configured on the web server.”

      • UnCivilServant

        Our protocol was to go through to the end of the set of questions and politely show them out. That way we could say without any potential dispute that we gave every candidate the same chance.

        But yeah, even for an entry level position, there are some things you really aught to know, especially with the education the candidates claimed.

        I’m somewhat relieved one candidate ghosted us. He had no technical classes listed on his incomplete sociology degree, and quite a few ‘studies’ courses.

      • UnCivilServant

        Rhy – I would have accepted that, and then asked “and the defaults are?”

      • Brett L

        You better not be sending anything you control both ends of over 80 or 443.

        EDIT: Actually, nothing better come in to an office over 80 unless its absolutely necessary legacy.

      • leon

        Actually…. I take that back. I mean it is good to know that they know what port is for HTTP/HTTPS traffic, but really i never ever have to think about that. And if i do looking up what port is standard for HTTPS is super simple.

      • UnCivilServant

        We run public-facing sites. We could try asking the internet to visit on 8008, but that wouldn’t get anything but headaches.

      • leon

        @Bret, Would you suggest port 22?

        When i worked tech support i legit had a user ask if we had port 22 on our servers open.

      • UnCivilServant

        Only to the sftp gateway.

      • Brett L

        We run public-facing sites. We could try asking the internet to visit on 8008

        Fucking government requirements. HTTPS only is good sense and good business and every browser supports it. have 80 redirect to HTTPS and fuck’em if they don’t like it.

      • UnCivilServant

        Are you assuming that port’s SSL settings, Brett?

        Maybe it identifies as an HTTPS port in the configuration.

        As for the regular web ports, we already do redirect 80 to 443.

      • Rhywun

        “and the defaults are?”

        To be fair, I have worked exclusively on internal applications but yeah I can still answer the question.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        ““and the defaults are?”

        The most common, and least secure, option.

      • UnCivilServant

        “You’re too snarky”

        *stamps ‘Rejected’ on application*

      • SDF-7

        Yeah, I’d have to guess — but I admittedly suck at networking. Just not my area of interest. Nor would I be applying for a web position, of course.

        My go-to question that trips up a surprising number of people: “A processor issues a load command on a memory location — walk me through what happens.” (Covers caching, bus addressing [if they’re good], page table HW vs. SW walkers, virtual fault, etc.). Always surprising to me how a lot of folks who should know better don’t think about these layers at all.

      • UnCivilServant

        I remember what those words mean, but the hardware stuff has circled ever further from my area of responsibility that the lines in between have faded.

      • robc

        We had a guy fail “What is a gcp bucket?” question last week.

        Its fine if you dont know, unless its your area of supposed expertise.

        Some day enough time will have passed, I will post excerpts from his resume…it was the greatest bad resume I have ever received.

      • UnCivilServant

        I hate the resumes where they don’t associate job descriptions/responsibilites with employers. I couldn’t tell what those candidate supposedly did at those jobs. Struck me as deceptive and sketchy, so we didn’t interview those candidates.

        I don’t care if it was just a helpdesk job, or if you were slinging fries, those are not negatives in evaluating a candidate. Hiding the job duties looks like you know you aren’t up the the level of the job you’re applying for.

    • hayeksplosives

      To the victors belong the spoils. It was ever thus. No such thing as “illegal colonialists.”

      • leon

        For me it’s just stupid. What is the conclusion we are supposed to take? That all white people are supposed to leave the Americas? Is it about reparations? Because making the son pay for the crimes of his father is antithetical to our (or at least my) understanding of justice.

      • Rebel Scum

        That. And they were still basically living in the stone age. I am not saying it is ok but it was bound to happen. History is replete with superior cultures conquering inferior cultures. I am really tired of the “sins of the father” bullshit.

      • Rhywun

        Your guilt and shame, their power and control. There is no “end” goal.

      • straffinrun

        ^Ding!

      • Brett L

        “Natural” is not an indication of good, moral, or ethical. Just effective. It is good to live in a world rich enough that effective is no longer primary determinant of the survival of your family, clan, and country.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yup. “We weren’t illegal colonizers, you were illegally squatting on our property.”

        I have a buddy who regularly put proggies into frothing rages by saying that no conquered people have ever been treated as well as the native american tribes. He tells them that if we weren’t so civilized we would have done what the Mongols, Romans and Persians did. Kill all the men, enslave the women and take all the land.

      • Rhywun

        Progs rewriting history with a [current year] lens is one of the more despicable tactics in their toolbox.

      • cyto

        No, seriously. The native tribes, who were totally at peace with each other, by the way, all got together and passed a law that said “No immigrants allowed!”

        oh, wait a sec…

        Uh… but totally not in a racist way like Trump. This was a totally not racist law against immigration…. uh… they, uh… .they only banned white people. Yeah, that’s it. And white people are the oppressors who have all the power. So it totally isn’t racist!

    • sloopyinca

      The writer of that piece doesn’t even know what a pontoon is. I have a hard time taking him seriously.

      • leon

        A Pontoon is the smallest conventional military unit led by a commissioned officer. Right?

      • The Last American Hero

        No, it’s a name of a woman’s lady parts.

      • Brett L

        Maybe in Bringlish, pontoon is dock. Like lorry for truck. Or calling your buddies cunts.

    • SDF-7
      • cyto
    • Not Adahn

      [even better zinger]

  26. Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

    Mr. Mojeaux and XX off to the Chiefs parade that. doesn’t start for another 3.5 hours. It’s colder than a witch’s tit out there and I decided I REALLY didn’t need the experience that badly. I’ll do a football game in this weather, but not a parade.

    • Chipwooder

      Your son’s going to the parade with Jim Morrison?

      • Chipwooder

        Or daughter….dammit, I always forget which one is which

      • straffinrun

        You could’ve been correct. Current year and all.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        You have no idea how right you are about that.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        XY would have, but he got in trouble for doing something he’d been expressly told not to do,* so he is a) at home with me and b) got his phone taken away from him.

        *He used the electric hand mixer to beat the grape jelly in the jar to liquify it. It’s not about the jelly. It’s about his perpetual “Fuck you, Mom and Dad” bullshit that doesn’t seem to be on the wane no matter what we do.

      • Nephilium

        *blinks*

        /raises finger to ask a question

        /puts the finger back down again

        /slowly walks away

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        That is the kind of shit he does every day and this is the least of it. He destroys most everything he touches AND leaves a mess behind. My counters were covered in jelly the first time he did it. He doesn’t even have the forethought (or decency) (or respect) to cover his tracks. It’s like he WANTS to be yelled at for the least bit of attention. This house functions around him, the shit he does, the attention he craves, and the stuff he destroys.

        There are 2 things that slow him down for a day or two: a) he made me cry specifically about what he did [that doesn’t happen often] or b) when I get out a piece of paper to start planning his emancipation when he’s 16. He “hates it here” and doesn’t “want to talk to anybody” and “if I could leave, I would.”

        “Okay, let me help you with that. Let’s plan this so you don’t screw up your life.”

        Tucks his tail and mumbles something about not meaning all that because he jniws I don’t play, and I certainly don’t bluff.

        Mr. Mojeaux can’t talk to him without screaming, so he just doesn’t. XY doesn’t speak to Mr. Mojeaux.

      • Rhywun

        the first time he did it.

        Oh my…

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        Things are a lot more awful at my house than the bankruptcy, but they’re not as bad as other people’s problems. Like my friend who got friend-zoned I’ve talked about before? Her ex is descending to stalker and kid apping territory.

        I’m not alone with two kids and an out-or-doors regular job and a crankpot dangerous ex.

        But I come here so much to get a respite by being able to think about adult things and philosophy instead of stupid shit.

      • Chipwooder

        Yikes…..ok, I’m not going to complain about my son anymore now.

      • cyto

        Are you sure you don’t have my son at your place by mistake?

        Because that totally sounds like my son. But he’s only 12.

        Driving us nuts.

        (and he’s a really good kid. I can’t imagine what happens when you get a bad one)

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        That’s just it. He can be a really sweet kid and not in that psychopath faking it way. He’s industrious and ambitious and has a plan. He is going to succeed in life and is/does things that I value.

        He just comes up with shit I loathe and despise AT THE SAME TIME. And his destruction isn’t limited to our stuff. He destroys his own property too, things he’s worked hard to buy and are expensive. It’s almost like he can’t help it, but he can. He just doesn’t want to go to the effort.

        I never really believed in “kids born bad.” Now, even though my kid isn’t ALL bad, I can believe it. I stopped judging parents on their kids’ failings a while back.

      • Jarflax

        He’s industrious and ambitious and has a plan. He is going to succeed in life and is/does things that I value.

        I try to avoid commenting on your posts about your son because I hear echoes of my completely toxic relationship with my mother and it likely makes my thoughts too one sided, but if you can honestly say the above it is hard for me to accept that some careless messes and breakages outweigh that. Isn’t that really the whole goal of good parenting? Producing a kid who will be successful at some good thing in the world. Don’t let depression and frustration highlight the negative so much that you cannot enjoy the positive. I’ve wasted way too much of my life doing that, and it ruins everything.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        I have before noticed your comments about your toxic relationship with your mother and I appreciate that because it makes me look at my own behavior and try to see where I can improve. After all, I had a toxic relationship with my father and I am trying not to be him. So far, I *think* I’m succeeding in that.

        However, I now have to also reflect on my own teenage behavior and adjust according to what I believe he is feeling.

        That said, I can read his Instagram DMs and I actually KNOW what’s going on in his head and it’s frightening.

        I do take your words into consideration, but I will gently and respectfully say that you don’t know what I am dealing with here and I’m not going to spill all his secrets because the internet is forever.

        You say “some careless breakage and messes.” I can assure you that “some” equates to thousands of dollars. My plumbing isn’t the only problem and he will not stop.

        I’m not going to say your mother did the best she could. I don’t know her and some parents don’t do the best they can.

        But I am doing the best I can. If my father had offered to help me get emancipated at 16 it would have been a good thing. Instead he wanted to keep me under his thumb as long as possible to beat me into submission. He went to his grave unable to break me. But life did because he didn’t teach me how to get along in the world.

        FWIW to you, I am the only person in the house XY will talk to (as in, initiates conversations) and wants to spend time with. I am the one who helps him with his business. I am the one who tries to teach. I am the one he hugs when he comes home from school.

        Again, I am doing the best I can and part of that is trying to remember how much of a shit I was when I was a teenager so that I can understand him a little better.

        And I read his DMs. It’s painful (no, he doesn’t bitch about us), but I do it to orient myself to what I think is best for him.

        And sometimes that means I have to get mean.

      • Jarflax

        Fair enough and I know I don’t know the whole story and that any judgment I make is probably wildly disconnected from reality. I just hear serious depression in your posts (not just about your kids) and I have struggled with that enough personally to know how poisonous it can be. Life is struggle and suffering, but it is also joyous and when your brain stops letting you experience the joy it is tragic. Many of your comments over the past months have sounded to me as if they came from a place of despair, and my comments are intended (clumsy as they may be) as a hand extended in the darkness,

        You are an intelligent, talented and interesting person. You are beloved here and your pain is shared. I hope my comments do not add to your pain.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        They don’t cause me pain, no, don’t think that. I meant it when I said I appreciate the reminder to see if I could be doing something better.

        I can’t explain further without getting into the bad stuff, which I din’t want to do.

        Yes I am depressed. I am medicated for it. I don’t know how much of it is situational. My life sucks. There’s no pill for that. My shrink agrees.

        But I love my son and I want what’s best for him. I am making mistakes, I know that. I just don’t which things are mistakes.

        Thank you for your kind words. They are much appreciated.

        I found great joy in Sunday’s win. It’s stupid but I did. It was nice to feel that.

      • cyto

        Yeah.. people without kids or even those with only one kid think they know everything.

        Once you get two or three, you realize that they kinda come out how they come out. Your job as a parent is just to help them be their best selves. Which can be translated as “all you can really do is screw it up”.

        I have 3. All very, very different. One girl wants to play rugby. Pissed that girl lacrosse doesn’t allow checking. She wants to hit someone.

        Her sister is really girly. I mean.. excessively so. We already are working on ways to keep her off the pole. She dances and poses and preens in the mirror. She’s 7. Crazy.

        I know people who got a bad one. Really good people can end up with a bad one. One lady at our church has two terrific kids. And one demon spawn. They look like death camp survivors all the time – hollow eyes, gaunt looks… because they are worried to death and working themselves to the bone keeping that little monster in line. They are as good a set of parents as you are going to find, and they got a bad one.

        I had him in my church group for 5 years. I ended up just sitting next to him the whole time to keep him in line.

        It is the parent’s version of “you get what you get and you don’t get upset.” You just do the best you can to encourage the good bits and discourage the bad bits an hopefully raise a good citizen and future parent to carry on your legacy.

      • Nephilium

        Ok… not the first time, so I need to ask. Why liquefy jelly?

      • cyto

        You don’t PB&J?

        Jelly comes out in big globs. Hard to spread. So you stir the top bit around with your knife to break it up.

        The mixer bit was entirely because he wanted to play with the mixer. And once it became a thing… defying mom.

        We’ve gone through bouts of “carving up the soap”, whacking trees and shrubs with sticks, throwing things at sisters, taking off on a bike or scooter when it is time to leave….

        Currently the thing is “waiting until 1 minute after time to leave for school to start getting dressed”. This morning Dad picked him up out of bed, carried him upside down into the living room, spun him around like I did when he was 3, and dumped him on the ottoman with a set of clothes. All 20 minutes before time to leave. Promised the wife I would not yell, so i got creative. He still waited until 5 minutes after time to leave to start getting ready. And it was our day to drive carpool. Next time my wife says not to yell at him, I might throw her at him to get him moving.

      • UnCivilServant

        Keeping the jelly intact makes it easier to transfer to the bread, and spreading it from there is a trivial matter. Breaking it up makes it fruit mash, not jelly.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        The mixer bit was entirely because he wanted to play with the mixer. And once it became a thing… defying mom.

        ^^^This guy gets it.

        Also, unrelated to “Fuck you, Mom,” he overthinks everything and does things the hardest way possible. Simpler ways simply don’t occur to him. That’s just the way his mind works and my mom thinks that way too. I’m trying to teach him how to think of the easiest way to do something.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        I do not like liquified jelly. It slips out of the sandwich. I would rather just plop globs on my PB.

      • Gadfly

        Promised the wife I would not yell, so i got creative.

        If you have the time to spend on getting even more creative, next time he stalls put him into the car in whatever state of dress he happens to be at when it’s time to leave and fake out driving towards the school for a few minutes.

      • Chipwooder

        My son keeps losing his house key. It’s driving me batty. I don’t want to have to pay to have him go to an afterschool program, but this latchkey kid stuff only works if you stop losing the fucking key.

        Plus, he isn’t doing his homework when he gets home like he’s supposed to and he’s eating all the stuff he’s not supposed to be.

      • cyto

        Holy crap…

        This is the “parents of teens” version of the Monty Python “LUXURY!!” Sketch.

      • Chipwooder

        I know. Overall, we’re quite lucky. He’s a solid little citizen in almost every way, especially compared to many of his peers. He still is a petulant brat sometimes, but my wife and I tell ourselves the same thing you said earlier – if this is how much of a pain a good kid can be, I am really glad I don’t have to deal with a bad one.

      • Agent Cooper

        My son turned off his Life360 detection to try and skip track conditioning. I told him I was most disappointed he was wasting lying on something so dumb instead of going to a concert or meeting a girl.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        Yeah, it actually bugs me he can’t be arsed to cover his tracks and lie right.

        It shouldn’t but it does.

    • Count Potato

      I just looked up the weather. That’s too cold to stand around.

      • Brett L

        But not too cold to stand around and DRINK

    • The Last American Hero

      Witch’s Tit – working title for the next publication?

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        LMAO!!!

        It’s real title is BABE IN WINTER, but henceforth, its nickname is WITCH’S TIT.

      • cyto

        Needs to feature a brass brassier.

      • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

        And it’s called BABE IN WINTER because in CODS & CUNTES, the villain lays a curse on the heroine: “May you find yourself at the mercy of a babe in winter,” which turns out to be Henry VI, and the hero and heroine do, in fact, find themselves at the mercy of the winter of 1422.

    • straffinrun

      It would be fucking hilarious if she switched parties.

    • Not Adahn

      I’m surprised twitter hasn’t removed #PelosiTantrum from the trending list yet.

    • leon

      To me, coming from you, “Friend” is a four letter word

    • Rebel Scum

      It helps that she wasn’t dressed like a Klansman like all the other Dem women last night.

  27. JD is Unemployed

    California really is a terrible choice of location for human habitation, just on the basis of earthquakes, and scarce natural resources alone. Add in the horrendous government and you bascially just have what should be a humanitarian crisis hanging off the left coast, that only manages to survive by acting as a parasite (water, pension funds, will to live) on the rest of the country. Is that about right?

    • straffinrun

      Umm…

      • JD is Unemployed

        No I am correct.

      • straffinrun

        Able to sustain 120 million. We got water, but not much after that.

      • Jarflax

        You have Yamato-damashii. Human spirit >natural resources as a factor in wealth.

      • Sensei

        I believe the cruise ship full of Corona virus is hanging off your RIGHT coast.

    • Brett L

      scarce natural resources alone

      No part of this is correct. California is basically the fruit producer for the nation, the nut producer for the world, and has abundant timber, metals, and fishing. Water is a bit of an issue, but that is more management than actual scarcity. Also, being downstream of several other states in many cases.

      • UnCivilServant

        You forgot the oil and gas.

      • Homple

        Fruits and nuts. I saw what was done there by you.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Maybe if they had used all the money they threw into the High Speed Train hole, to build desalinization plants they could have put a dent into the water thing too.

      • UnCivilServant

        But that would endanger the habitat of the california grotesque sea slug!

      • Gadfly

        Water is a bit of an issue, but that is more management than actual scarcity.

        And isn’t this mainly due to the fact that they built their biggest city in one of the most arid parts of the state? They could always remedy the situation by building some desalinization plants, but that would require they first get their power situation under control.

    • JD is Uninformed

      Well it appears that you are all very correct and I am a dunce. I suppose I was thinking about this with regards to water. I also have been given the impression that nut production is very water-intensive and therefore potentially “non-eco friendly” or something, but then the context of that was something along the lines of “haha stupid dumb vegans are killin’ the planet hur hur” comparing almond milk with dairy. So in my mind I was thinking that to produce all those nuts and fruits, California was dependent on states like Colorado not “taking too much”, and some kind of skewed and narrow property rights angle on rivers and other natural water sources.

      • R C Dean

        Water is a tough one. I gather a lot of CA’s water comes from an upstream that is in other states. In that sense, its not self-sufficient, but neither are (probably? I dunno) a lot of other states. There’s a reason why water rights are the topic of endless conflict and disputes, and that’s pretty much it. If you let the upstreamers block your access, a lot of the world is screwed.

        Consider, also, that surface water is pretty much a zero sum game. Any water CA gets from upstream is water that the upstreamers aren’t using/allowed to use. To some extent, this can be mitigated with downstream storage, but building a dam is pointless if the upstreamers don’t allow the water to fill the dam.

        No good answer, in short.

      • Jarflax

        Water is a commodity. Stop subsidizing some uses and penalizing others and the market will rapidly provide not just a good answer but the best answer possible. The fact that that answer is likely to involve it becoming prohibitively expensive to live in LA, Phoenix, and Las Vegas is the reason it doesn’t happen, but the Gods of the Copybook Headings are always waiting in the wings and if you start out distorting the market you have to distort it increasingly to dampen out the recoil from the earlier distortions. Eventually something breaks and it is very bad to be in a 20 million person city in a desert when that happens.

  28. Rebel Scum

    House Speaker Nancy Pelosi broke congressional tradition by introducing President Donald Trump as only “the president of the United States” during the State of the Union address on Tuesday evening.

    “Members of Congress, the president of the United States,” Pelosi said, introducing Trump in front of the joint session of Congress.

    Previous House speakers have introduced the sitting commander in chief by saying they had the “high privilege and distinct honor of presenting to you the president of the United States.”

    I dislike the formality and spectacle as much as I imagine most here do, and would prefer the president simply send a letter to congress with maybe a short address to the country from the oval office, but I can’t help but wonder how this would be viewed if it was Obama and speaker Paul Ryan.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It would have been called treasonous, racist, fascist, etc…

    • Chipwooder

      The media was apoplectic about the “You lie!” thing, so yeah, they’d be going berserk if Ryan had done any of the things Pelosi did last night.

    • R C Dean

      When Ryan introduced Trump a few years ago, he said he was proud to “prevent” the President, etc.

      Talk about inadvertently telling the truth.

      • Agent Cooper

        Ryan is shit.

  29. The Late P Brooks

    Trump, destroyer of nations

    In his State of the Union address Tuesday night, President Trump tried to make it sound like everything’s coming up roses for the United States – and of course, he said all the credit belongs to him. But as a Democrat, I believe the state of the union is not good – our nation is divided, and there is too much hatred and too little forgiveness.

    And there is no chance of improving things as long as Trump remains president.

    ——-

    While President Trump promised to unite the nation, the truth is that he has only made America’s divisions worse with his attacks on politicians, individuals and entire groups of people.

    ——-

    Trump also claims to believe in the First Amendment, yet demonizes the media on an almost daily basis as “enemies of the people,” calls any media report that do not make him look good “fake news,” and has halted White House daily press briefings.

    The level of Democratic vs. Republican hostility in the House chamber, where the speech was delivered, was palpable.

    Coming off his impeachment by House Democrats, Trump refused to shake the extended hand of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif., before he began his speech. Pelosi ripped up the text of the president’s speech right after he delivered it.

    Pelosi told Fox News she destroyed the speech “because it was the courteous thing to do considering the alternatives” and said she was “trying to find one page with truth on it” but couldn’t.

    In addition, Trump’s State of the Union address felt more like a campaign speech for someone running for reelection than a speech to Democrats as well as Republicans in Congress. It lacked the formality, decorum and graciousness that a State of the Union normally has.

    This is the new normal under the Trump presidency.

    This must be her first SOTU. “Formality decorum and graciousness” she sez. She forgot “articulate”.

    This was such a nice country, before that asshole Trump came along and ruined it.

    • UnCivilServant

      Oh my, no president ever used the state of the union address to tout the successes of their administration. What an unprecedented development.

    • Rebel Scum

      And there is no chance of improving things as long as Trump remains president.

      Because of the hate and division perpetrated by those suffering from TDS.

    • Rebel Scum

      Trump also claims to believe in the First Amendment, yet demonizes the media on an almost daily basis

      Not a 1A issue. This person is a) not too bright or b) disingenuous as the day is long.

      • UnCivilServant

        A believer in free speech freely speaking his mind? Shocker!

      • Pope Jimbo

        Look anyone who doesn’t 100% agree that the Press is noble, selfless and always right about everything is just not a believer in the 1A.

      • Donation Not Taxation

        +1 Clark Kent

      • Jarflax

        The 1st Amendment guarantees freedom of the press. A State sponsored propaganda arm like the MSM has become has little to do with freedom of the press.

  30. JD is Unemployed

    Speaking of Bobby Brown, this is probably my favorite song by him, and a hell of a video. If you don’t much care for it, please at least skip to 1:02 for the best cameo.

    Aaaaand speaking of legends who fell prey to the crack pipe, I was watching the episode of Highlander featuring Vanity last night. Good grief she was a smoke show. Magnificent woman.

    • Toxteth O’Grady

      Many cameos! Missed that video the first time around.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    House Speaker Nancy Pelosi broke congressional tradition by introducing President Donald Trump as only “the president of the United States” during the State of the Union address on Tuesday evening.

    She really wanted to introduce him as “Mister Trump, current occupant of the White House”.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    The weather station has been running a little webcam clip of snow falling in Midland, Texas. Is there no atrocity Trump is unwilling to commit?

    • JD is Uninformed

      Watchin snow flakes fall down
      ‘Til all the colors are blanked out
      I was so scared of how fast
      The whole town is just white now

  33. Gadfly

    The Iowa Caucuses early results, which is an odd way to put it 36 hours after it ended, show Mayor Pete and Bernie Sanders locked in a tussle.

    RCP has the current results as 71% in, and the news is really bad for Biden. Not only is he currently coming in fourth, his second round performance is worse than his first round. He’s supposed to be everyone’s second choice, yet in the first caucus in the country he actually loses support when people are asked for their second choice.

    • kinnath

      Given the rules of the caucus, if you are viable in the 1st round, your numbers are locked it. You can only go up in the 2nd round. If you are not viable in the first round, you could go up in the 2nd if you recruit from other non-viable candidates. Or you could go down as your people abandon you for other candidates.

      Biden is fucked.

      • R C Dean

        His total votes could go up in the second round if he picks up a few new voters as their second choice, but his percentage could go down if others pick up more “second choice” votes.

      • kinnath

        The raw vote totals so far show:

        Sanders in the lead at the end of 1st round with Buttigieg second. Biden and Klobuchar are 4th and 5th with Warren in the middle.

        Buttigieg picking up in the most votes in the 2nd round to go ahead of Sanders. Biden and Klobuchar losing votes in the second. These votes appear to be going to Buttigieg, Sanders, and Warren in that order.

    • Agent Cooper

      He will beat the pants off Pete and probably Sanders in South Carolina, though, giving him some much-needed JOEMENTUM.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of civility and decorum

    Fred Guttenberg, the father of a victim in the 2018 mass shooting in Parkland, Florida, was escorted from President Donald Trump’s State of the Union address Tuesday night while the President defended the Second Amendment.

    Guttenberg, who had attended the State of the Union as a guest of House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, told CNN that his outburst came when Trump discussed gun rights.

    “Just as we believe in the First Amendment, we also believe in another constitutional right that is under siege all across our country. So long as I am President, I will always protect your Second Amendment right to keep and bear arms,” Trump said in his speech.

    That’s when Guttenberg yelled out in protest something about victims of gun violence, he said, and was promptly escorted out by Capitol Police.

    Will Ms Pelosi be censured?

    I crack myself up.

    *The prosecutor should throw the book at him, and get him jail time, just so Trump can pardon him.

    • Chipwooder

      It’s kind of repulsive the way that guy uses his late daughter as a club to beat people who disagree with him.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        “Your grief does not impose an obligation on the rest of us.”

      • Shirley Knott

        “Emotional imperialism” is the best short descriptor this site has led me to.

      • cyto

        A man said to the universe:
        “Sir, I exist!”
        “However,” replied the universe,
        “The fact has not created in me
        A sense of obligation.”

  35. The Late P Brooks

    Maybe if they had used all the money they threw into the High Speed Train hole, to build desalinization plants they could have put a dent into the water thing too.

    *clutches chest, falls to floor*

    • Chipwooder

      This is the big one! Elizabeth, I’m comin to join you!

    • cyto

      That’s brilliant.

      Too bad more people aren’t drawing these parallels to help folks along to this conclusion.

  36. sloopyinca

    I almost forgot to bring up the best moment of the SOTU (in my opinion anyway).
    When Trump started with his Oprah-esque calling people in the gallery to get their prize, he called out that kid “stuck in a failing government school”.
    It wasn’t a public school. It wasn’t struggling. He called it a failing government school. Which was freaking awesome. About time somebody properly framed the failure and how it has an outsized impact on poor minorities stuck in shithole government kid-prisons.

    Of course the Dems sat on their hands when a 9-year old black kid gets to escape the government school she’s been stuck in due to the Dem governor killing a program that would have given her mom a chance to move her to a better place. And I can assure you that image will become a campaign ad over the next several months.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I didn’t watch it, but that does sound awesome.

    • Grumbletarian

      That’s just another example of Trump the Racist using minorities as campaign props! He’s only helping people of color in order to get their votes!

      /derpocrat

      • Rebel Scum

        Which means he is making decisions that benefit him politically. Impeach!

    • ChipsnSalsa

      government school

      remember to reference government schools by that name. They are run by the government for the government. Not for your particular kid(s).

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        In Britain they are aptly called state schools.

    • Ozymandias

      I don’t know when I started doing it, but I always refer to “public schools” as “government-controlled education” or something of the like in conversations with people. My favorite is to use it as an opener – a corrective. Someone will be talking about “public education” and I’ll interrupt and say, “you mean government-mandated education?” There’s a usually a long pause as they try to put it together, but sometimes you can see a light flicker behind those dim, dead eyes. I usually follow that up with, “Just like the DMV. Great stuff, those government monopolies.”
      And this is why my wife is reticent about taking me out in public.

      • UnCivilServant

        So you’re ~that guy~.

      • R C Dean

        I use non-euphemisms like that whenever I can (mostly, “illegal alien” or my preference, the shorthand “illegal”, as in “Do we keep track of how many illegals have babies here and then skip on the bill?”). You can see some people starting to lean forward or clenching their jaws as they start to reply, but I’ve never had anyone actually challenge defend their use of a euphemism.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Given that I now send my kids to a government-funded, privately run school, I find the distinction to be very important. This GFPR school is public in that anyone can apply and (if they win the lottery if it is needed) go without any kind of academic, financial, or behavioral selection process. So calling the government-run school a government-run school is what I do, because my wife still works there and doesn’t like me calling it a government-miss-managed school.

      • UnCivilServant

        Does she also complain about the school’s management? Or is she the one managing it?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        She complains about the things she thinks are wrong. We disagree on a few points, but she’ll call a spade a spade.

        She started volunteering and then working there in part as self defense against the potential (and eventual reality) of us needing to protect our kids from the unintentional twitching of Leviatian’s tail. We pulled out kids out when we did because of information collected by having a person on the inside.

        So no, she’s not a doe-eyed true acolyte of the Ghost of Horrace Mann

      • Shpip

        I always liked Vin Suprynowicz’s term “the government’s mandatory youth propaganda camps,” but I admit that it’s a bit wordy.

    • Q Continuum

      Gonna be a Trumptard for a second here, not because it was Trump specifically that said it, but because school choice is a moral issue. Thank the Lord *someone* at the top is starting to take this seriously. Who knows if he’ll follow through on his promises, but the fact that he’s even talking about it is a leap forward.

      Sure, it’s a great electoral strategy; but I don’t give a shit how cynical a ploy it might be, it’s the right thing to do.

      When it comes to school choice, MAGA.

      /Trumptard off

      • cyto

        Also, dems are specifically campaigning on replacing Devoss with a public school teacher on day 1.

        This is an important issue. I hope trump can break through with it. It could be enough to carry the house with him.

  37. Sensei

    The media is just so predictable. Companies just take those profits and put them under the mattress.

    Trump touts stock market’s record run, but who benefits?

    While pensions and retirement funds were lifted by the rise in stock markets, the president has avoided talking about one key point about who really benefits when the market rallies: Most of the gains go to the small portion of Americans who are already rich.

    Fortunately Iowa front runner Comrade Sanders has a fix!

    • R C Dean

      Most of the gains go to the small portion of Americans who are already rich.

      Pensions and retirement funds total up to a huge number, a sizable percentage of total investments. Is it really less than half? Don’t know, but I doubt it.

      • Sensei

        https://www.sifma.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/10/SIFMA-Insights-Who-Owns-Stocks-in-America.pdf

        Some “double counting” makes this a little tough to put into twitter sized bites.

        As noted above, 52% of MFs are equity funds. Therefore, a main vehicle to owning stocks for the individual investor
        is through MFs. 99.5 million individual investors, or 56.0 million households (43.9% of total U.S. households), own
        MFs (as of 2018).

        It is households (HH) that own equities, 37.6% of total equities owned in the U.S. The next largest holders are MFs,
        at 22.6%, and as explained above individuals own MFs as well. In other words, individuals own stocks directly and
        indirectly (ex: via MFs).

    • Rhywun

      “Business News”

      Reuters has become a full-on leftist propaganda outfit.

      • Q Continuum

        Add it to the list.

        ABC, NBC, CBS, NYT, WaPo, CNN, most local papers… etc. etc.

    • Fatty Bolger

      It’s pretty funny, because the stock market was one of the few economic positives under Obama, and they were constantly touting it. Suddenly it’s only good for rich people. Huh.

      • The Last American Hero

        Under Clinton, it was “largest economic expansion in history”. Under Bush, 2003-2006 was touted as “Yeah, Wall Streets doing well but McJobs.”

    • B.P.

      In other news, the Dow has had a pretty good run over the last two days.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    Double down

    In a statement Tuesday, Rackauckas said he believed the women’s complaints based on the evidence he had before leaving office.
    “I just feel terrible for the women who had the courage to come forward and give their evidence to the authorities in this case,” his statement said.
    “It’s hard for them to make these reports about things that were so very humiliating in the first place then have to relive the pain,” he said. “Certainly, any prosecutor should think long and hard before dismissing such a case where multiple women have independently come forward and subjected themselves to the hard process of (baring) their souls to the authorities.”

    That’s the first time I actually read anything about that case (Doctor, Girlfriend Drug and Rape HUNDREDS of Women!)

    It sure would be a shame if that former prosecutor got drunk and fell off the sidewalk in front of a garbage truck.

    • R C Dean

      then have to relive the pain

      Once again, we assume that the accusers were actually victims, even after it has been shown they were not.

    • Q Continuum

      Like someone said yesterday, he’s the Wilt Chamberlain of raping unconscious women.

      • Swiss Servator

        STEVE SMITH NO DO THAT. HIM WANT CHALLENGE!

  39. Oy the Billy-Bumbler

    Happy birthday Hammer. The true home run champ.

    • Ozymandias

      Absolutely.

    • MikeS

      ??⚾?

  40. Rebel Scum

    What lies?

    Security escorted him from the chamber after he was heard shouting “What about my daughter!” in response to Trump’s comments about the Second Amendment being “under siege,” Newsweek previously reported.

    “So long as I am president I will always protect your Second Amendment right to keep and bear arms,” Trump said.

    In response to the night’s events, Guttenberg tweeted:

    “Tonight was a rough night. I disrupted the State Of The Union and was detained because I let my emotions get the best of me. I simply want to be able to deal with the reality of gun violence and not have to listen to the lies about the 2A as happened tonight.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Well, it’s sad about his daughter but he doesn’t get a pass to parlay that loss into restricting my rights. It’s all political theater and I guess I can give him a bit of a pass here but that’s about as far as I can go.

    • Raston Bot

      i read Why Meadow Died by another Parkland dad. it pissed me off all the assaults and death threats Cruz committed and was never arrested which would’ve prevented him from buying his guns. and he wasn’t arrested b/c of outright incompetence plus leniency reforms in the name of equity, i.e. “school-to-prison” pipeline. fuck Guttenberg.

      • Chipwooder

        Exactly. Who does he blame for his daughter’s death? Not the school system that refused to deal with Cruz, the bureaucrats who instituted this bullshit no-discipline policy, not even the craven coward of a cop who was supposed to protect those kids and did nothing.

        No, he wants to blame law abiding gun owners who have done nothing wrong and were in no way responsible for her death. Go piss up a rope, Fred.

    • Rebel Scum

      What rules is Twitter actually following when they police accounts?

      FYTW?

  41. Rebel Scum

    Feelz > Rights

    “They were all over the building and they were, frankly, intimidating people whether they meant to or not, that was definitely the reaction,” Senn said. “People were scared.”

    Legislative staff were notified of the demonstration and the House authorized staff who were made uncomfortable to take leave from work or work from home, according to an email shared with the Northwest News Network.

    Senn said she was especially concerned because school children were forced to remain in the House galleries while the armed demonstrators were in the Capitol.

    “We teach our kids all the time what to do if there’s an active shooter and then they come to the state Capitol and they see people with these large weapons, how are they supposed to respond,” Senn said.

    Senn’s bill would prohibit the possession of openly-carried weapons on the state Capitol grounds. The proposal would amend an existing law that already outlaws guns in places like jails, courthouses and public mental health facilities.

    Maybe refrain from teaching kids to fear inanimate objects and people exercising constitutional rights.

    • R C Dean

      “We teach our kids all the time what to do if there’s an active shooter and then they come to the state Capitol and they see people with these large weapons, how are they supposed to respond,”

      Like there isn’t an active shooter, because there isn’t?

      Do you also train them to panic every time they see a cop? What about a color guard?

      • UnCivilServant

        Panicking around cops is a good way to get shot.

      • Jarflax

        Having a puppy around cops is a good way to get shot.

  42. Suthenboy

    “A majority of the people that live in the United States are the descendants of illegal colonizers that committed a mass genocide.”

    When I hear people bitching about the way whitey treated the injuns I usually ask “What were they doing each other before we got here?”

    They were eating each other FFS.

    • KSuellington

      Yep, and engaged in almost constant warfare with each other for land, resources, mates, and well, for fun. There is a good book called The War Before Civilization that goes into estimates of how many died from warfare before historical records based on paleontology and archeological finds. We are now living in the safest time ever, by far.

      • Rebel Scum

        engaged in almost constant warfare with each other for land, resources, mates, and well, for fun

        It’s almost as if they were adults that had geopolitical goals just like every other tribe/group/kingdom/country/etc. in the world ever.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The South American Indians take the cake for crazy ass brutality but the North American Indians were bad enough, what with enslaving each other and skinning their captives alive and chucking them out into the snow and whatnot. Sure, the Europeans were rough men back then but jeez.

  43. Plisade

    I would say that it is a small percentage of the population that can improvise, adapt and overcome, when original plans fail. In my experience, even with professional managers, the ability to – and I hate this term – “think outside the box” is rare. People get stuck in this mode of thinking that because something should work that it will, if they just keep trying. (It’s the same mindset that keeps them forever wanting to try Socialism.) Frequently I have to snap my team out of this mental trap and get them to change course when things go awry.

    • Plisade

      Wow. Is the Iowa caucus app contagious?

  44. R C Dean

    Excellent article by Codevilla

    Keys off of Roberts suppression of inquiries into the Ciaramella to make the point that we are essentially in a revolutionary struggle to overthrow a ruling class, and that preservation of existing institutions is a chimera that will only lead to the revolution’s defeat.

    • Raston Bot

      The sad but inescapable consequence of this force is that conservatives have no choice but to follow the partisan logic of revolution—fully conscious of the danger that partisanship can make us as ridiculously dishonest as Adam Schiff or CNN’s talking heads, into rank-pullers like John Roberts, and into profiteers as much as any member of the Biden family.

      that doesn’t sound like winning.

      • leon

        Winning is not a Republican Forte

  45. KSuellington

    Well, it looks like Sanders is in the lead in Iowa. He shouldn’t need all those votes. Some of them should be redistributed to the other candidates that don’t have as many votes. It’s only right that they should get their fair share.

    • Sensei

      +1 Mummer

    • Chipwooder

      KC knows how to throw a championship parade!

      • UnCivilServant

        How far did they manage to throw it?

    • Mojeaux, Gilmore v2

      LOL He was drunk and didn’t know there was a parade at all.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Also, dems are specifically campaigning on replacing Devoss with a public school teacher on day 1.

    It’s like they want people to vote for Trump. Not just black people- hispanic people, people who live in cities…

    *I’m undoubtedly being overly optimistic. The Dems and their army of government school propagandists do everything they can to control the narrative.

  47. straffinrun

    Kamala Harris is currently making the not so subtle case that Trump will get acquitted because he’s white.

    • R C Dean

      In contrast to Obama, who wasn’t impeached because he’s not-white.

      • leon

        And it completely forgets that Bill Clinton was aquitted too

      • Jarflax

        See another white devil beat the rap!

    • Rebel Scum

      Calling people racist is really all they have.

      • KSuellington

        And they have worn that insult down so far that even most normies now are highly suspicious of the term.

      • straffinrun

        Boring, isn’t it? That’s why they expanded into “institutional racism”. Couldn’t find enough individuals that fit the bill.

      • UnCivilServant

        Institutional Racism like “Affirmative Action”? Discriminating against equal or better qualified candidates because of their skin color sounds pretty darn racist to me.

      • straffinrun

        If the results of the institutions don’t equal some arbitrary standard of diversity, you need institutional racist policies to fix the institutional racism.

  48. Rebel Scum

    Jim, you lying hack.

    Yes, the president had some heartwarming moments during this speech, but he was also engaging in some deeply divisive rhetoric aimed at immigrants, aimed at Latinos. And while, yes, he was trying to make appeals to the African-American community, it can’t be forgotten he was awarding the Medal of Freedom to Rush Limbaugh, who has a history of making derogatory comments about African-Americans. And so I think, you know, overall it’s a wash.

    Isn’t Limbaugh’s producer black?

    • The Last American Hero

      Making fun of the Obamaphone lady is “a history of making derogatory comments about African Americans.”

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Heh, I had to rewatch that. I have to admit I do agree with her Romney sucks position.

    • Enough About Palin

      Maybe. But if so, Rush hates his lazy black ass.

  49. Raston Bot

    i have the SOTU on and the “surprise guest” vet just saw his kids and wife. this is more show than SOTU. now the crowd is chanting USA USA USA.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      He knew the Dems would sit on their hands and refuse to clap so he made the frumpiness look as damaging as he possibly could. It was a show alright but it was a well played show.

    • Gadfly

      this is more show than SOTU.

      Democracy has a tendency to devolve into panem et circenses, and if more circus means less bread getting taken from me I’m all for it.

  50. straffinrun

    Now it’s Doug Jones imploring people to open their minds and not be shackled to a political party. And then goes on to explain why he’ll vote along his party’s line.

    • straffinrun

      “So many people will look at what I’m doing today and will say it’s a profile in courage.”

      Fucking politicians. That’s a hundred times more narcissistic than anything Trump has ever said.

      • Rebel Scum

        I just turned it on and I am done with the sanctimonious, disingenuous horseshit after 30 seconds.

      • straffinrun

        Really? They are assuring us that they are impartial and have really thought hard about this. It isn’t something they are taking any pleasure in, but removing their political enemy is something that has to be done.

    • Chipwooder

      He knows he’s going to get annihilated in the election anyway.

  51. The Late P Brooks

    Thank a teacher!

    Seventy percent of millennials – and 64 percent of Gen Z – answered that they’d be somewhat or extremely likely to vote for a socialist candidate, according to a poll conducted by data and research firm YouGov last September for the Victims of Communism Memorial Foundation. The poll also showed only 57 percent of millennials believe the Declaration of Independence better “guarantees freedom and equality” over the Communist Manifesto. And millennials regarded President Trump as a greater threat to world peace than North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un and Russia’s Vladimir Putin.

    “The historical amnesia about the dangers of communism and socialism is on full display in this year’s report,” Marion Smith, executive director of the Victims of Communism Memorial Foundation, said in a statement. “When we don’t educate our youngest generations about the historical truth of 100 million victims murdered at the hands of communist regimes over the past century, we shouldn’t be surprised at their willingness to embrace Marxist ideas. We need to redouble our efforts to educate America’s youth about the history of communist regimes and the dangers of socialism today.”

    A few million deaths here, a few million deaths there… It’s really not fair to condemn the whole program over a few slip-ups.

    THEY MEANT WELL.

    • Chipwooder

      A few million deaths here, a few million deaths there

      Oh but that wasn’t REAL communism

    • ChipsnSalsa

      We had a missionary from Central America speak a couple months at church. He took every opportunity to remind people about how terrible socialism is.

    • Akira

      I’ve ACTUALLY heard people argue that communism wasn’t that bad because the deaths were from things like starvation, disease, and exposure to freezing weather and that it wasn’t like Nazism, where they purposely killed people.

      • UnCivilServant

        Except for the purposefully starved Ukranians.

        But the argument they made should defeat their own interest. What sort of monster wants a system that managed to starve, freeze, and pestilentially exterminate a few hundred million through sheer fucking incompetence?

  52. The Late P Brooks

    In the book “Can American Capitalism Survive?: Why Greed Is Not Good, Opportunity Is Not Equal, and Fairness Won’t Make Us Poor,” Washington Post columnist Steven Pearlstein claims the majority of millennials in America said they would rather live in a socialist country.

    Sounds legit.

    • Jarflax

      They would rather live in their fantasy land. Hell so would everyone. Eventually they will grow up and realize that you have to live in reality and in reality socialism is not the big rock candy mountain, it is the gulag.

    • Raven Nation

      ” claims the majority of millennials in America said they would rather live in a socialist country”

      I think that has been reliably substantiated. However, what the studies have found is that most people who say that really don’t understand what socialism is. Once the people taking the survey start asking them if they are supportive of losing things they like, support drops pretty quickly.

      Here’s one summary: https://www.cato.org/publications/commentary/why-so-many-millennials-are-socialists

    • Akira

      Steven Pearlstein claims the majority of millennials in America said they would rather live in a socialist country.

      I would bet that the questions were some vague bullshit like “Would you prefer to have healthcare for free?” and “Do you think everyone has a right to an education?” which he then used as a proxy for socialism.

  53. The Late P Brooks

    “So many people will look at what I’m doing today and will say it’s a profile in courage.”

    Those deadbeats who parachuted into the farm fields of Normandy got nothing on him.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      What about the people who think he’s a weasel? Do they count?

  54. wdalasio

    While Nancy Pelosi is a loyal leftist, she’s had a pretty fraught relationship with the current left. Her particular brand of leftism (she’s one of the people Jean Kirkpatrick coined the term “San Francisco Democrat” with regard to) has fallen out of favor with the party’s activist base (which I’ll characterize as grad school revolutionaries). It’s too affluent, too white, and too pragmatic. Remember, little more than a year ago, “the Squad” was pretty much in an open fight with her. Giving the green light to impeachment made her acceptable to them. If she could get rid of Bad Orange Man, then her differences with the grad school revolutionaries would be forgiven. She would be the savior of the revolution. Only thing is, that was never in the cards. Not long ago, even Pelosi seemed to realize that. Only, she got to believing her own BS.
    And now she’s come crashing down to reality. The impeachment failed, Donald Trump is more popular than ever, and the Democratic party, which insisted on its innate ability to manage our entire economy, proved itself incapable of managing even a caucus vote in a high school gymnasium. Tearing up the speech wasn’t an act of strength or defiance. It was an act of frustrated, petulant, impotent, rage. And everybody knew it. So, now is the time for the grad school revolutionaries to abandon Nancy Pelosi. Nancy who? The fact that her failure was one they insisted upon is beside the point. Her failure can’t be their failure. So, you won’t hear many on the left saying much about her tearing up the speech. To do so would be to associate themselves with the disaster to their side that they created.

    • Sensei

      Pretty much this,

      Nancy is pretty smart and I’m still trying to figure out why she had to cave into her left here. She knew she had no chance in the Senate. And the way she ran this in the House meant she picked up no Republican support.

      • Agent Cooper

        I thought she’s slow-walk the heck out of it to keep the ‘cloud’ of impeachment over Trump closer to the election. For being so smart, what she let happen was incredibly dumb.

  55. The Late P Brooks

    Treacherous slander

    Jill Biden announced she’s officially unfriended Sen. Lindsey Graham — unfriended the old-fashioned way: She’s done.
    The reason: Graham’s allegiance to President Donald Trump and, specifically, his encouragement of investigations into her husband — and Trump’s Democratic rival — Joe Biden, and her stepson, Hunter Biden. Trump and his allies have repeatedly made unfounded and false claims alleging that the Bidens acted corruptly in Ukraine.
    “Disgraceful,” Jill Biden told CNN’s John Berman in an interview Monday.

    Back in November, when Graham first suggested the Bidens would be investigated, Joe Biden expressed the same ire: “I am disappointed, and quite frankly I’m angered, by the fact — he knows me; he knows my son; he knows there’s nothing to this,” the former vice president said of Graham, a Republican.
    One bewildering aspect of this, according to Jill Biden, is that the Bidens and Graham, along with the late GOP Sen. John McCain, were “great friends” — at least professionally. They traveled together, for politics. They had dinner together. “You know,” said Jill Biden, “and now he’s changed.”

    Unfounded and false claims! #BELIEVEHER

    “And now he’s changed.” The Rooshunz done zombied him. He’s nothing but a Trumpbot, now. It’s tragic, really.

    • Jarflax

      McCain was too addled when he died to pass on the blackmail info he had on Lindsay.

    • Rhywun

      unfounded and false claims

      OFFS.

      • Rhywun

        In response to a New York Times report that Schiff knew about the whistleblower’s concerns before the official complaint was filed, Trump claimed that Schiff “knew long before and helped write it, too.”

        Spokespeople for both Schiff and the whistleblower denied the allegations.

        QED!

        Good grief they are sad.

    • Gadfly

      “And now he’s changed.”

      Yeah, well, that whole Kavanaugh circus really seemed to open his eyes, so blame your own party ma’am.