IFLA: The If You Squint Real Hard” Edition of the Horoscope for the Week of March 29

by | Mar 29, 2020 | Advice, IFLA | 196 comments

The news isn’t really in where the stars are, but how they’re moving.  Having said that, If I had a paying client that I’d never see again, I might be tempted to mention the following “alignments”:

Luna-Earth-Venus:  Good news for women, especially in regards to home and domestic life.  Safety and protection for women.

Sol-Mercury-Mars:  good luck/positive change for the military or created by the military.

Venus-Mercury-Jupiter:  Peaceful transition of power, a woman assumes control, Overlord is feeling particularly benevolent, political sex scandal

Now, since we are pretending that these are actually solid alignments, that gives us:

Sol-Mercury-Mars X Venus-Mercury-Jupiter:  A woman’s advice/leadership leads to victory, and for the full construction:

Sol-Mercury-Mars X Venus-Mercury-Jupiter L Venus-Luna-Earth:  A soldier gets liberty unexpectedly, goes home to find his wife pregnant.

But like I said, all of that is too shaky to stake my reputation on.  What is happening that is worth mentioning for real* is how things are moving.  Capricorn got a break last week when Saturn finally moved off their couch, and will get an further one on Monday when Mars finds somewhere else to be.  Expect conflict levels to drop.  While you still have Jupiter drinking your beer, without those other two he’s actually pretty coll to have around, and having someone of his size backing you up will be helpful if you need to flex your authoritah.  Mars moving into Aquarius then indicates major happenings for the Navy, if there are any sailor Glibs out there.  Unfortunately Saturn being there shades the major news to the negative side, but it doesn’t seem to be loss-of-a-ship major.  Mercury in Pisces still is good news for speed demons and bad news for investigators, and this might be related to the Moon in Gemini which indicates a significant lie or contradiction this week.  Aries continues to get robbed, with their luck only being slightly elevated from normal.  It’s the last week to enjoy Venus in Taurus, so if you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with.

The cards this week show three things surprisingly clearly — LOTS of conflict (because of all the swords cards).  LOTS of burdens/obstacles (four of the cards showing people and heavy weights) and the rise of spiritual leaders.  I swear if this involves Caesar Andy…

Aries:  Page of Swords – Authority, overseeing, secret service, vigilance, spying, examination, and the qualities thereto belonging.  This is a kid with a sword.  Someone with the ability to do some damage in a clumsy way.  In the upright position, he’s working for you.

Taurus:  5 of Swords reversed – Degradation, destruction, revocation, infamy, dishonor, loss, burial.

Gemini:  The Hanged Man reversed – Selfishness, the crowd, body politic

Cancer:  Knight of Swords – Skill, bravery, capacity, defense, enmity, wrath, war, destruction, opposition, resistance, ruin

Leo:  Ace of Cups – True heart, joy, content, abode, nourishment, abundance, fertility, Holy Table (kind of obsolete), felicity

Virgo:  10 of Swords – Pain, affliction, tears, sadness, desolation

Libra:  Knight of Cups –  Arrival, approach, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement

Scorpio:  King of Cups reversed – Dishonest double-dealing man, roguery, exaction, injustice, vice, scandal, pillage, considerable loss

Sagittarius: 9 of Wands reversed – Strength in opposition, delay, suspension, adjournment.

Capricorn:  Death reversed – Inertia, sleep, lethargy, petrifaction, somnambulism, hope destroyed.

Aquarius:  10 of Wands – Oppression, false-seeming, disguise, perfidy.

Pisces:  The Chariot reversed – Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat, car trouble

About The Author

Not Adahn

Not Adahn

Despite all my rage, I am still just an impeccably dressed rat.

196 Comments

  1. Suthenboy

    *Looks at horoscope, facepalms*

    Every damned time. I cant catch a break.

  2. Not Adahn

    JD, I assume you are using some weird Brit spelling for “best sci-fi series ever?”

    • LCDR_Fish

      Yep…was about to tell him them’s fightin words.

  3. Tundra

    Leo: Ace of Cups – True heart, joy, content, abode, nourishment, abundance, fertility, Holy Table (kind of obsolete), felicity

    That sounds pretty good. And here I was expecting to be murdered in my sleep by my wife. Did I mention that I don’t take well to this Groundhog Day quarantine/freak out/rights-stomping bullshit?

    Instead, I get this:

    Getting the Ace of Cups upright shows that it’s time to let loose of whatever emotional baggage you have and start living your life to the fullest. Like with all the other aces, there is a new beginning that is indicated here – a chance to start fresh. It might come in the form of opening yourself up to the possibilities of new relationships, romantic or otherwise, that have the ability to make you emotionally fulfilled.

    The release indicated by this card may either be spiritual or emotional, depending on what you are going through. The Ace of Cups may come to a reading after a long period of being lonely or enduring something that deeply hurt you emotionally, and it’s appearance may be there to herald the turning over a new leaf.

    So thanks, NA!

  4. Sean

    “Cancer: Knight of Swords – Skill, bravery, capacity, defense, enmity, wrath, war, destruction, opposition, resistance, ruin”

    It’s on!

  5. Tonio

    A good friend of mine studies the stars, Venus and Mars are alright tonight.

    • Not Adahn

      Did you see my reply re: PCR v. P-01 v. SP-01?

      • Tonio

        No, will check that out. Thanks.

        FYI, local range/dealer has some CZ models in stock so I’m covered either way.

      • Not Adahn

        TL;DR: PCR v. P-01 = they are identical in ergonomics and function. Decide on the basis of whether or not you want a light/laser, and if not then looks/price.

        SP-01 = too big/heavy for me to carry concealed, YMMV. Other than that, is superior in pretty much every way to the other two.

  6. Mojeaux

    Taurus: 5 of Swords reversed – Degradation, destruction, revocation, infamy, dishonor, loss, burial.

    *agonized groan*

    • mexican sharpshooter

      What are you upset about? I got the kid with a sword.

    • l0b0t

      Thank you for your kind words last night. It truly means a lot to me.

      • Mojeaux

        I am very concerned about you. 🙂

      • l0b0t

        Thanks. I’ll muddle through but I feel so unmoored and adrift. The Panicgeddon is in no way helping.

      • Tres Cool

        Find this reassuring from esteemed Dr. Fauci:
        “There are things called models, and when someone creates a model, they put in various assumptions. And the model is only as good and as accurate as your assumptions.”

        Which makes me think of this.

      • Chafed

        I’d be better off if Adam West (RIP) was my governor.

      • BakedPenguin

        It makes me think of this.

  7. westernsloper

    Gemini: The Hanged Man reversed – Selfishness, the crowd, body politic

    WTF? Does this mean I am going to start being this way, or get even more pissed off at the people already doing it?

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      Yeah, us Geminis seem to get all the weird shit horoscopes.

  8. AlmightyJB

    “Virgo: 10 of Swords – Pain, affliction, tears, sadness, desolation”

    Well, tomorrow is my last day of my 11 day vacation.

  9. l0b0t

    Sagittarius: 9 of Wands reversed – Strength in opposition, delay, suspension, adjournment.

    That’s the best one I’ve had in weeks.

  10. Tres Cool

    “Virgo: 10 of Swords – Pain, affliction, tears, sadness, desolation”

    So essentially just another week.

  11. gbob

    Not a sailor, but I do love me some rum, sodomy and the lash.

    • l0b0t

      Jack was every inch a sailor. Or, she was only a fisherman’s daughter, but you should have seen her reel when she saw my rod.

  12. Suthenboy

    Reposting from last thread: In response to Don’s complaint about the popular definition of nerd being expanded from ‘bookish’ or technically knowledgeable to people who indulge their psychological needs by living in a fantasy world – “I am currently spending a lot of time thinking about how an economy affects culture and this is one of the aspects I am still in the process of weighing: how an advanced economy removes danger and scarcity and thus people, in the absence of a crucible, become incapable or unwilling to deal with reality.”

    I get the homeostatic system of success breeds softness which breeds failure. This is not a new idea and we all discussed it before. What I am thinking is that in moving from a non-industrial society to an industrial one we are in a transition period from an economy where the only way to thrive is to take from others to one where there is little to no scarcity. We have many vestigial aspects of uncivilized culture and are hopefully in the process of shedding them. For example, the two subcultures where we see the most uncivilized behavior, the criminal community and politics, are both subcultures that produce nothing. They survive by taking from productive people.

    I will eventually muddle through it and write something.

    Am I nuts, too drunk too early or onto something? Thoughts anyone?

    • 61North

      I’m drunk early, too. But I disagree where it comes to thriving by taking.

      • 61North

        Also, how’s your arm/hand that got bit by the dog?

      • Suthenboy

        I have recovered due entirely to the skill and talent of a reconstructive surgeon. I am fanatical about wound care so I had no infection whatsoever. I am back to normal….well, I am back to my old self. I have a couple of spots (palm sized on my left leg and the tip of my right middle finger) that still have no sensation due to severed nerves but we will see if that goes away. It doesn’t worry me. About 10% of my body weight is scar tissue anyway.
        Thank you for asking.

        Looking at history the average person today has far more wealth and health than any medieval king. Naturally because I am an American I see the period around our revolution as the time when we began moving from a world where very few people at the top were wealthy and everyone else was essentially enslaved and lived in bone crushing poverty and insecurity to the time we are in now.

        Example: “Slavery is the greatest evil of our time. It morally debases both the slave and the slaveholder. This institution must be destroyed.”
        That is Robert E. Lee prior to the civil war. Yet when his parents in law died he inherited their slaves and he did not free them. After reading that quote I got curious and found that very thing was true of most of the founders. In principle they were abolitionists but in practice it was economically unfeasible. That began a transition period where slavery began to be seen as a moral issue instead of strictly an economic issue. When the industrial revolution really got cranked up it made it not only feasible but necessary. Slavery was going to disappear with or without the civil war.
        I think we are still in that transition period between uncivilized and my ideal of what civilization should look like.

      • Donation Not Taxation

        Last article posted on Glibs by Suthenboy was May 7, 2019 , so been awhile.
        If article-length about “we are still in that transition period between uncivilized and my ideal of what civilization should look like.”, consider whether or not to include counter argument to https://www.glibertarians.com/2019/06/a-pessimistic-assessment/ by RC Dean

    • Sean

      People suck.

      Kids are the worst.

      ?

    • Fourscore

      “criminal community and politics”

      Redundant but in agreement. The political class absolutely needs the criminal class and when there isn’t enough crime they start passing laws to make more crime with licensing, permits, etc. Criminals make their own rules but need the pols to keep them safe from us through such things as gun laws, etc.

    • Mojeaux

      Tangentially: Let’s define “taking.” Lots of honorable, hard-working people define “taking” more harshly than it really is. For instance, farmers.

      If their business has been manipulated by government subsidies–and let’s not kid ourselves, newer generations of farmers were born into it and don’t have the werewithal to change it even if they wanted to–is it “taking” to keep monies they are given that they can’t give back to the taxpayers?

      So let’s say a fresh-face n00b with a well-developed sense of honor says, “I am going to give this back to the taxpayers and make it on my own without government assistance.” And he writes a check to the IRS for the same amount that landed in his bank account.

      And then he goes broke because the system is set up for him to go broke.

      Yes, it’s TAKING, but the system is set up for him to fail and his honor/integrity/philosophies demand he give it back even though he knows that it will not get where he wants it to go.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, to my point.

        You’re sitting there in church stewing in your sins of the week, which happen to be raising your voice at your wife and kids, and accidentally pocketing a pen from the bank.

        Preacher’s pounding on domestic abuse and wanton theft.

        To YOU, you are guilty of domestic abuse and wanton theft.

        To the guy who beats the shit out of his family and steals cars for a living, he’s sitting there not really getting (or caring) that the sermon is directed at him.

      • Tonio

        Very well put.

      • Mojeaux

        I wish I would complete the thought before I hit post. *sigh*

        The abuser and thief has the disadvantage, i.e., he THRIVES by taking without remorse, while the decent guy does not thrive at all because he is emotionally distressed.

      • cyto

        As a baptist organization, our church is pointed toward evangelism… but the thing that is tiring me out is that we do frequent sermons on marriage and I attend a men’s group. All of the dudes in my group are the “good husband” type. We all do a major share of the childcare, pamper our wives, make sure they are appreciated, etc. So every men’s bible study is about being a better husband and father. It kinda gets old.

        Then I checked out what the wife is studying…. not one thing about being a better wife and mother. Loads of affirmation crap. “Life is tough and unfair, but the lord will sustain you” kind of stuff.

        Great… thanks for the help guys. No wonder all of the wives are such ….

        Well, not gonna finish that.

      • Ted S.

        No wonder all of the wives are such ….

        Baptist-American Princesses?

      • Mojeaux

        As a baptist organization, our church is pointed toward evangelism… but the thing that is tiring me out is that we do frequent sermons on marriage and I attend a men’s group. All of the dudes in my group are the “good husband” type. We all do a major share of the childcare, pamper our wives, make sure they are appreciated, etc. So every men’s bible study is about being a better husband and father. It kinda gets old.

        This is also a problem in my church; in fact, I had a character who was struggling with it (okay, flat-out resented it).

        “Mother’s Day is sacrosanct, but Father’s Day is a joke.”

        I got quite a bit of fan mail from Mormon men who said HOW DID YOU KNOW?!?!?! I THOUGHT I WAS ALONE!!!

        The difference is, the women ARE taught how to be better wives and mothers. Women who are single feel left out and judged (they aren’t, but it’s easy to feel that way). Women who either can’t or don’t want to have children are sad.

      • Raven Nation

        I know a number of single women at my wife’s church who resent the way Mother’s Day is handled because it diminishes non-mothers.

      • cyto

        Tell them you’d be happy to help them practice for becoming mothers one day…..

        Just offering a helping hand!

      • Nephilium

        cyto:

        If you’re using your hand, I think you’re doing it wrong.

      • Don escaped Oklahoma

        ancient joke about a note in a church flyer

        The New Mothers Club’s spring calendar is set and will start in April. Ladies wishing to become a New Mother should see Father Paul in the basement after Wednesday services.

    • Tonio

      When you write about something you take care to walk your audience through the thing. In so doing you often discover questions you had not asked yourself, etc.

      Please do.

      • Suthenboy

        I am gonna give it a try but I am not as articulate as some around here. As I said, I will try to muddle through it.

        Another problem is wife keeps the TV on 24 hour per day and that seriously detracts from my ability to focus.

      • cyto

        Maybe you could get two TVs and have her tune one to Fox and one to CNN and turn them both up really loud. That should help.

      • Chafed

        Sounds like a noise canceling headset.

      • Suthenboy

        I was just chuckling and thinking the same thing.

      • cyto

        Except instead of being 180 degrees out of phase with the noise, they cancel out the content and amplify the background noise.

  13. Spudalicious

    “ Libra: Knight of Cups – Arrival, approach, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement”

    Looks like I’m going to get laid.

    • Tres Cool
    • l0b0t

      Damn. Those look yummy. We have a pork butt in the oven on an all day adventure, and a bunch of chicken breasts poaching in broth for chicken salad.

    • Not Adahn

      Exactly how many carry guns do you own?

      On that, I’ve been carrying my P365 for six months now, and IDK if it’s because the cerakote was applied over the stainless slide, if it was a bad cerakote job, or if it’s just a limitation of the material, but it’s worn through to the steel on the body side.

      Also something to spend your trumpbux on — dude is ringing 6″ plates at 90 yards with it:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEKTsP4r6jQ

      • Sean

        I have no idea.

        Sadly, they all were lost in a tragic boating accident.

      • cyto

        My Remington M783 counts as a carry gun… just sayin’

      • cyto

        Oh, and $150 for a magazine for that 2011? Holy crap!

        I need to start making 2011 magazines….

      • cyto

        That being said, his time to reacquire target is ridiculous.

    • Tulip

      I have got to join your compound.

  14. MikeS

    Pisces: The Chariot reversed – Riot, quarrel, dispute, litigation, defeat, car trouble

    Sounds like I picked a good week to stop sniffing glue work from home.

  15. Not Adahn

    Wholesale club shopping report:

    Lots of masks being worn, scrupulous social distancing, with people’s hackles going up as you came within 5 yards. $5 coupon for a ham so I bought one. It’s just a mass-market ham, but it will provide me with the raw materials for sandwiches, omelettes and beans this week. Odd shortages. The cheap canned tuna was gone, but plenty of the solid white albacore. The green beans I had a coupon were gone, but the non-coupon eligible one was stocked. Still can’t find a pork loin to make puerco guisada. Did they all get shipped to China? Zero paper towels or facial tissues.

    • kinnath

      I got to Sam’s about 15 minutes after opening this morning. There weren’t many people in the store. Most, but not all, of the shelves that were bare 10 days ago are restocked. But still no TP. I saw one couple with a multipack of Charmin in their cart. They must have gotten the only package in the store when it opened up.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Huh. Went food shopping yesterday. Stocks look like they’ve completely recovered in everything. No shortages I could see anywhere. This was in SW Edmonton.

      • kinnath

        Plenty of food to be had.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Mind you, West Edmonton Mall (think “the blueprint for Mall of America, built by the same family-owned development company that built WEM”) was just short of a ghost town; over 1,000 stores, and maybe 20 of them still open. Looks very weird. One of the open stores, T&T (a Chinese/Asian chain grocery store owned by Loblaw’s Corp.) has been mostly-empty for weeks now, ’cause everyone’s afraid that they’re gonna get the CCP Cooties from shopping there.

      • Fourscore

        Is WEM suffering from the mall syndrome of empty stores, etc? Not sure about MOA, since I don’t go there either but the small malls here are moving into different kinds of businesses.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        No, WEM’s chock-a-block with active stores (normally). There’s the occasional empty storefront, but it never lasts long before it’s reno’ed and re-occupied. I suspect that there’s just so much traffic/variety there that it’s a somewhat self-amplifying/self-sustaining retail environment.
        There are other, smaller malls here that have significant amounts of empty storefronts. One mall infamously closed a few years ago and the lot’s now been cleared and is being developed as mid-priced condos.

      • grrizzly

        WEM is the only part of Edmonton I’ve ever visited. I recall trying Segway there for the first time.

      • egould310

        I went to the WEM back in December. Stopped at the McDonald’s on the way to the airport. Good McDouble, and the coffee was good too.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Heh. I’ve run into a surprising number of people in my life who had a layover at the airport, took a shuttle into town to see WEM, and then flew out again a few hours or a day later (perhaps after staying at the hotel in WEM overnight). Never saw anything else, nor were they interested.

      • grrizzly

        I’ve never been to the Edmonton airport either! We just drove from Calgary to WEM and then drove back the same day.

      • Fourscore

        We stopped on our way north, ate at Hooter’s, kept on going. We’d been to MOA a few times but always playing the tourist game, not shopping.

    • juris imprudent

      We went to Costco (dog food top priority there, limit was 1 per customer, so I bought 1 and wife bought 1), oh and gas there was $1.85/gal in PA! Swung by Wegmans, bought a few things, but they were out of chicken thighs and the lettuce was pretty sad, so we made a 3rd stop at Giant to finish. Strangely we almost never make 3 stops like that. At Costco they had a pallet maze for people to queue, but there was no line when we arrived and with no crowds and no sample-clusters the shopping was a breeze.

      • Ted S.

        On the way home Thursday, gas was $2.23 here in New York. Didn’t pass by a gas station on Friday.

      • Fourscore

        I bought gas at $1,40 yesterday, locally. Not sure why the price was that low but I didn’t ask. Pay at the pumps these days but then I went inside and shopped anyway. Nothing makes sense any more.

  16. Spudalicious

    And for you Capricorn’s, petrification is better than putrification. Just sayin’.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I do feel my arteries hardening…

    • juris imprudent

      Yeah, that’s the wife and the next day she is slothful will be the first.

  17. LCDR_Fish

    For KDW fans, his appearance on Goldberg’s “Remnant” this past week is excellent (thankfully more “Mad Dogs and Englishmen” recently too).

    • JD is Unemployed

      Neat – I think I only listened to The Remnant once when they did those crossover eps with The Jacket.

  18. Tundra

    Good news?

    So, they did an on-the-fly trial of some cheap and available drugs. Results look good. FDA and CDC not convinced. But I like this:

    March 28 Update: In a Twitter post day, Prof. Raoult said: “Our study concerns 80 patients, without a control group because we offer our protocol to all patients with no contraindication. This is what the Hippocratic Oath that we have taken dictates to us.”

    • Gustave Lytton

      ?‍♂️

      • grrizzly

        There are no control groups for the regular flu vaccines either. For the same reason.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Too bad for Nevada and Michigan residents

    • Urthona

      I dunno. I mean the mortality rate of the study was 1%. Does this prove anything?

  19. gbob

    Day 2 of quarantine. Enough beer and booze. Thought 2 weeks locked in with my gal.would be great.

    Nope. Since being told she needs to be quarantined, she wanders about like shes on death’s door. Shes religiously watching St. Cuomo giving his daily sermons.

    Going to be a long two weeks.

    • Tundra

      Thought 2 weeks locked in with my gal.would be great.

      LOL!!

      NOOB!

      Seriously, brother, good luck and Godspeed. Be brave, be resolute, but mainly stay drunk and unnoticeable!

      • Chafed

        As a long time married man, can confirm. My wife sounds similar to your girlfriend gbob. Practice social distancing. It may save your relationship.

    • Q Continuum

      There’s only so many times you can have sex in a short period with the same person before reading a book is preferable.

      • Ted S.

        The Kama Sutra?

      • Q Continuum

        ^^^This guy gets it.

    • l0b0t

      I find many discarded shopping lists while stocking the shelves. Last night, there was one with the usual items, but, on the back, in bold and underlined, was a plea – “WE NEED CUOMO!

  20. Gustave Lytton

    My count was off, so had to go back to the corona improvement warehouse for another piece of moulding. So much for trying to minimize trips out.

    Decided to try out the Desantis pocket holster today. Prints far more than I’d like but otherwise not bad.

    • Tundra

      What are you carrying? I have a Remora that is pretty good for that. Mine isn’t really a pocket gun, but works great in cargos or a jacket pocket.

      • Gustave Lytton

        BG380. I’d like to replace it with the M&P version w/o a safety or laser. Not crazy about pocket carry without a safety, but one on that gun is just ridiculous. Takedown pins on ARs move more freely that it does.

  21. Mojeaux

    I am tidying stupid little corners of my office and sorting paperclips as to color and material in a very successful bout of work avoidance.

    • MikeS

      I’m supposed to be doing homework, but my Glibs After Dark hangover is impeding my brain.

      • Mojeaux

        Piker. I was up at 8:00.

        Not purposely.

      • MikeS

        Ick. I was up at 10:00 and that was early enough. I see an afternoon nap in my future.

      • The Hyperbole

        The weather has turned nice and I clean out the shop a few days ago, I had every intention of working on some projects that have been sitting all winter, now think I’m going to lay down and read a book, Thanks internet weirdos.

      • Mojeaux

        Nobody forced you to socialize.

      • The Hyperbole

        But all the cool kids were doing it!

      • MikeS

        And me, too!

      • l0b0t

        I was beard-shamed. 🙁

      • Nephilium

        Well someday you’ll get there.

        At some point I do need to shave the sides though. The shaved head/full beard look is just strange.

      • Nephilium

        Oh and l0b0t, I’ve got a bottle of the Jameson Cold Brew. To me it comes across more of a coffee liquor then a whiskey. Not bad, but not what I was expecting.

      • l0b0t

        Exactly! It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t quite whiskey either. I think it would make a delightful Irish Coffee or as a sub for vodka in a White or Black Russian.

      • egould310

        “ The shaved head/full beard look is just strange.”

        A look sort of like the strong man at the circus? Russian bear wrestler? Leader of a Nazi prison gang? It’s a well established and perfectly acceptable look in our society.

      • UnCivilServant

        The shaved head/full beard look is just strange.

        Not at all, I know plenty of people who have that look. They usually pick it up when male pattern baldness sets in.

      • Nephilium

        Hangover?

        /tosses MikeS a beer

      • Tundra

        How’s your friend?

      • Nephilium

        In the hospital.

        Doing OK, but I don’t have any details yet.

      • Tundra

        Sorry, dude.

        I hope she gets better soon.

      • Mojeaux

        Whoa. Wow. Geez.

      • Nephilium

        Thanks all. Can’t exactly try to visit now either.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Oh, man. Sorry. That sucks hard.

      • MikeS

        Oh shit. Really sorry to hear that, buddy.

      • Chafed

        Are we talking illness or self-harm? Sorry to hear it either way.

      • Nephilium

        No details as of yet, and the contact I got the information from is not one that I really want to press. Even when I do get details, I may not be at liberty to share them.

        Just finished up the one work task I had this weekend, so I’ve got that going for me.

    • egould310

      Well done. I wasted three hours this morning surfing Wikipedia on Matthew Sweet, which led to Lloyd Cole, Richard Hell, a little Thurston Moore, a little Lou Reed, and then finished with a complete look at the discographies of everyone mentioned.

      Pick an inane topic, go to Wikipedia and just start clicking links. You won’t just avoid that work, you’ll obliterate it!

      • gbob

        I have some bad news about Lou Reed for you…..

      • Fourscore

        He’s still alive?

      • J. Frank Parnell

        Uh oh, did he catch the coronavirus?

      • Mojeaux

        LOL

        My current project (what might have been a very lucrative one, were I not spending so much time on it) is preparing 3 volumes of print and ebook Pakistan travel guide (which, BTW, is now on my bucket list).

        Well, the first volume has 400 pix, all of which are very low quality. Client’s happy with the job I did (with print, not done with ebook yet). Thrilled, actually.

        I am not. So I am using Google image search to find all these things in high quality and replace them. This also involves repaginating the book because I purposely scaled the low-quality ones down so it would not be so obvious. Now I can use the bigger images.

        Hello, Pshop, my old friend.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, and this goes back to Suthenboy’s point about thriving if you’re dishonest.

        My client’s thrilled with what I did. My going back and doing it is completely voluntary and I’m killing my hourly rate doing it, but I can’t NOT. Call it OCD or pride in my work or honor/philosophy/integry, or whatever you want, I am not thriving here.

      • egould310

        It’s pride in your work. That’s a good thing, though it may reduce your hourly rate sometimes.

        Speaking of which, later today I have to re-do some work I did Friday. I don’t work on weekends, but it’s bugging me. Better take it easy on this vodka.

      • Tundra

        Sweet is woefully underrated.

      • l0b0t

        Pick an inane topic, go to Wikipedia…

        I have a strange fascination with the crazy, vitriolic edit wars on articles about food from the Levant/Mesopotamia/Mediterranean/North Africa. There is a vocal contingent of editors who go crazy when any mention is made of Jews/Israelis enjoying or contributing to the spread of said foodstuffs.

      • Ted S.

        My favorite are the edit wars on the recent deaths page.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        There seem to be a few hundred editors on Wikipedia that have totally lost their shit about whatever their favourite topic is, and have managed to destroy the dream of what Wikipedia could’ve been. I keep having to remind my nieces/nephew and god-daughters that Wikipedia is, at best, a starting point to learn about anything that might be the slightest bit controversial.
        I’m not sure how much my warnings are sinking in. Not much, I suspect.

      • l0b0t

        I was once part of the League of Copy-Editors Project there and consequently dealt with a great deal of vandalism. I finally left the Wiki entirely after dealing with a multi-year online stalker who was convinced, because I had reverted some vandalism on the article for Glenn Beck, that I was Glenn or someone who worked directly for him.

  22. LCDR_Fish

    Well, getting ready to start a new job on Monday and I’ve been dealing with some kind of stupid stomach bug all weekend. No other symptoms other than constant gas/rumbling/discomfort and when I eat anything….just a freaking hassle. Hopefully it clears up a little more before tomorrow morning – but at the same time – if I go back to my traditional work lunch tomorrow, the afternoon could be unpleasant.

    Side note though. Now that my buddy helped me mill out my lower – if I might as well use my trumpbucks, does anyone have a good link on steps/parts for building an AK-AR?

    • Q Continuum

      Check out http://www.palmettostatearmory.com they sell great kits for a first-timer. I recommend building an AR before an AK; AK (assuming you want to bend your own receiver) is much more involved.

      There are tons of great instructional videos on how to assemble everything on youtube. I like this guy:

      https://www.youtube.com/user/nsz85

      I think I watched a how-to video by him when I build my very first lower back in the before time.

      • Q Continuum

        For example – This:

        https://palmettostatearmory.com/psa-16-carbine-length-chf-m4-5-56-1-7-rifle-kit.html

        comes with everything you need minus the stripped lower itself. For that, you can pick up an Anderson Manufacturing one for usually 40-50 bucks. It’s a no-frills, solid receiver.

        The link above includes a complete upper assembly that’s already built. If you want to actually build the upper assembly, you’ll have to buy those components separately and then also purchase a lower parts kit. I’d recommend against that on your first time. The upper assembly requires quite a bit more work and tools than the lower; installing the gas system and the barrel can be tricky.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Thanks for the link. I may just go with something simple like that for the first time – but since I do have an AR-15, I was hoping to build a 7.62 compatible model with my new lower.

      • Q Continuum

        PSA might have something like that. I’ll poke around.

      • Plinker762

        I’ve built a number of 7.62×39 ARs if that is what you are thinking about.

      • LCDR_Fish

        Yeah, this is what I would like to build. If you have any kit links or recommendations for the steps to proceed, that’d be great.

        Thanks,

      • leon

        psa always is rate limiting?

  23. Sean

    Sister update – going in for surgery today.

    They have her on morphine right now.

    The sucky part is that due to Kung Flu, her husband can’t keep her company in the hospital.

    • Mojeaux

      Thanks for the update. That really really bites. You said she’s only 40? Has she had a DEXA scan? She might not have if she’s only 40.

      • Sean

        I don’t know if she’s had one or not. Information is still a little sparse.

        The whole thing has happened quickly.

      • Mojeaux

        If she doesn’t have early onset osteoporosis, she must have fallen pretty hard.

      • Sean

        There were some mumblings about her diet and lack of nutrition.

        She doesn’t eat like I do. She could use much more steak in her diet.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        And possibly 1,000 IU/day of Vitamin D along with a nice big glass of milk.

    • cyto

      Well, the good part is she’s on morphine… so easier to handle the isolation.

      The bad part is they probably won’t give her enough morphine. They are in a panic about getting addicted. Here in Florida you don’t even get morphine for surgeries like gall bladder removal. That was a pretty horrible night, I’ll tell ya. The next morning the anesthesiologist told me point blank that the federal crackdown changed how they handle it – he would have had me on a morphine drip pre-crackdown. And Oxy for the recovery. As of when I had my surgery, it was ibuprofen and acetaminophen alternating. After about 36 hours that would have been fine.. but up until then? Yeah, not cool.

      • Q Continuum

        When my appendix burst, I got Dilaudid. It was glorious.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Dilaudid was the drug of choice for ushering my Mom (who had terminal liver cancer and was in hospice) into eternity. Sadly, because her liver had all but shut down and Canada had not yet put assisted-dying laws into place, the docs were unable to give her enough dilaudid to completely dull the pain (dilaudid is metabolized in the liver, and her liver wasn’t breaking it down properly, so dosing her was a precarious balance between “enough to hopefully kill most of the pain” and “enough to kill her”). I wish they would’ve just dosed her full-on and let her die content. Instead, she was tortured to death.

      • Tres Cool

        When Mama Tres was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, she was very jaundiced from the tumor pressing on (and closing, I guess) her primary bile duct. So she was yellow, and quite gross. Evidently it causes intense itching, so to make her more comfortable she got dilaudid. She only realized she was sensitive to it (mildly allergic) after they pushed it in her IV. It caused….more itching.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        I would’ve thought the docs already knew that most opioids are itch agonists. Gabapentin (“morontin,” heh) or Lyrica probably would’ve been better.  :-/

      • Mojeaux

        Jelly. Morphine doesn’t work on me. Dilaudid makes me puke. Tramadol’s pretty good, but fentanyl… Man, after my hysterectomy (complications OMG), fentanyl was a godsend and they let me have as much of it as I wanted. “Stay ahead of the pain. Don’t be a hero.” No. No, I sure wasn’t going to be a hero.

      • cyto

        Like I always say… .never try the good stuff. You won’t want the normal stuff anymore.

        Works for booze, cars, furniture…. and drugs.

      • egould310

        Best wishes to your sister. My brother and I have that same photo at that same spot. I should give him a call.

      • Tundra

        Prayers for all of you.

      • Spudalicious

        Finger crossed.

  24. Q Continuum

    “Libra: Knight of Cups – Arrival, approach, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement”

    It at least seems neutral, so I’ll take it.

  25. Donation Not Taxation

    Elton John hosting concert tonight. Entertainers allegedly performing homes. Fundraiser Wuhan flu. No word on if concert is for or against. Hopefully, the money will go to pay some or all of the $2,200,000,000,000.

  26. Aloysious

    ~”Scorpio: King of Cups reversed – Dishonest double-dealing man, roguery, exaction, injustice, vice, scandal, pillage, considerable loss”~

    Nah. I’ve got the day off.

    • juris imprudent

      Have you considered a career in politics?

      • Aloysious

        ew. That’s disgusting. I will now recoil in horror.

  27. commodious spittoon

    Libra: Knight of Cups – Arrival, approach, proposition, demeanor, invitation, incitement

    Not during coronapanic, no sir.

    • Q Continuum

      How are local strumpets and ladies of the night supposed to deal with that?

      • Jarflax

        The streetwalkers near my office have largely disappeared. As have the dealers. I’m sure no one will care, but I suspect they are suffering more than most right now. I doubt a junkie can just put their addiction on hold for the lockdown.

      • Ted S.

        +1 Panic in Needle Park

      • Chafed

        That’s actually an interesting question. Jarflax pointed out what I would expect for streetwalkers. What about high class call girls? Do they have the financial reserves to sit this out? Do they go back to work as soon as possible or do they wait a bit longer to ensure their good health?

    • Suthenboy

      There sure are a lot of wanna-be tyrants giving a lot of orders.

      My response:” Your role is logistical. We dont take orders from the hired help, especially when you step outside the statutory limits on your responsibilities.”

      • juris imprudent

        Have I possibly mentioned my surface-temperature-of-the-sun dislike for the shit-weasel called governor of PA?

      • Tres Cool

        “Wielding unprecedented emergency authority…”

        Every one of these petty tyrants and wannabe despots are using that. Its way scarier than the CoVID-HIV-Flu-Herpes-orrhea.

      • Q Continuum

        “CoVID-HIV-Flu-Herpes-orrhea”

        Bring that one back from ‘Nam did ya?

      • Tres Cool

        I left off MRSA.

  28. Tres Cool

    Inspired by Sean, Im about to head out into the post-apocalyptic wasteland to procure some steaks. I had Stanhope on and this line always sticks with me:
    “you were born free and got fucked out of half of it, and you sit there waving a flag celebrating.”
    And- “the only time you’re free is when you come to terms with and realize that you’re completely and unapologetically fucked. Then you’re free to float around The System.”

    • cyto

      Sounds like something Morpheous would tell Neo….

  29. Toxteth O’Grady

    SSD, glad you’re OK. Saw someone succumb to that. Terrible.

    Sorry I missed The Big Chat.

    Are any other countries saner re analgesia and thus better for elective surgery?

  30. juris imprudent

    So, in desperate need of clearing my mind of the derp from earlier, the missus and I went out to the shop to take the snowblower of the Cub and put the mower deck on. I have now successfully transferred a great deal of my enmity from brain-damaged feminist to the brain-damaged engineers who designed the XT3 to include a blind nut to bolt connection with a difficult to balance bracket. We did persevere and we did succeed (even did a check run) and retired for lunch and a suitable beverage.

  31. Don escaped Oklahoma

    Ross Douthat being interviewed on on C-SPAN2 regarding his Decadent Society:

    As a conservative, his answer to (ostensible American) decadence is a new and wider agenda for religion. He doesn’t think we’re living in a Brave New World, but he finds our current “stability” “unproductive.” He characterizes most art as immature; the golden age of TV is nothing but algorithm-driven pop culture.

    Oddly, he has an excellent grasp on how safe life is for kids, how low the violence and (non-pot) drug use rates are, how much lower pregnancy rates are . . . and so doesn’t seem to be calling for the Mothers Against Everything platform.

    I don’t sense a clear theme other than “I don’t like how others make their choices” even though it seems I’m living a pretty good life.

    • LCDR_Fish

      He was on the 5th Column a couple weeks ago. Similar points.

  32. cyto

    Ok, this is amazing…

    https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2020/03/23/820274501/her-incredible-sense-of-smell-is-helping-scientists-find-new-ways-to-diagnose-di

    Story says Woman Can Smell Parkinson’s Disease…

    Which made me immediately say “no she can’t”. But I read the article. Apparently it is scientifically verified and they are working to identify the compounds that she’s detecting.

    Money quote about the study they ran:

    Joy made only one mistake. She identified a man in the control group, the group without Parkinson’s, as having the disease. But many months later, Kunath says, that man actually approached him at an event and said, “Tilo, you’re going to have to put me in the Parkinson’s pile because I’ve just been diagnosed.”

    • hayeksplosives

      That is weird. I’ve heard of the cancer-sniffing dogs, but that humans could be such sensitive sniffers…

      • Hyperion

        Apparently, some women also have super vision and can see many more variations of colors than men can.

        I also know for a fact that most women have bionic type super hearing. I’d make sure I’m at least a block away if I’m going to say something I don’t want my wife to hear. Not that I’d ever do that.

    • Tundra

      That’s pretty cool.

    • Hyperion

      Very cool. I had read a couple of stories about dogs being able to smell cancer.

  33. hayeksplosives

    Aries: Page of Swords – Authority, overseeing, secret service, vigilance, spying, examination, and the qualities thereto belonging. This is a kid with a sword. Someone with the ability to do some damage in a clumsy way. In the upright position, he’s working for you.

    And:

    Luna-Earth-Venus: Good news for women, especially in regards to home and domestic life. Safety and protection for women.

    Sol-Mercury-Mars: good luck/positive change for the military or created by the military.

    Venus-Mercury-Jupiter: Peaceful transition of power, a woman assumes control, Overlord is feeling particularly benevolent, political sex scandal

    I like my chances.

  34. Hyperion

    You know, as a Capricorn, having survived these horoscopes for the last few years, I figure I’ll make it through a pandemic with ease.

    I just went down to the local deli to get beer. It’s like a fucking ghost town out there. I talked to the owner. I feel bad for him. He’s in there every day now and like he told me ‘I have a family to feed’. Fortunately for him, he has a carry out deli and alcohol take out business to try to keep going. Lots of business owners are not as lucky.

    Speaking of people’s livelihoods, look at these 2 morons:

    THE RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH!

    OK, comrades.

    I wonder if these 2 ever thought about the following scenario, because I’m sure many thousands of people like this actually exist out there.

    Let’s say I invested in 10 properties with the idea of renting them out for my income. That’s my job. Let’s say I make $500 a month on each unit per month. That’s $5000 a month income for me. I have to pay taxes on that and do maintenance. What happens to me if these two geniuses get their way? Then I can’t make my payments, I can’t do repairs. Basically, I’ve been ruined. Fuck you 2 imbeciles.

    • J. Frank Parnell

      Let’s say I invested in 10 properties with the idea of renting them out for my income.

      Nobody needs 10 properties, comrade.

    • Fourscore

      No fear, Pelosi says 2 T is just a down payment on the ol’ corona thing. Soon, we’ll get to talking about some real money.

      When everyone is rich no one is rich.

      • Hyperion

        “When everyone is rich no one is rich.”

        Social justice at last!

  35. Homple

    “Virgo:  10 of Swords – Pain, affliction, tears, sadness, desolation”

    So to hell with personal distancing and all that crap. I’m going to visit nearly dead Wuhan virus patients and have them breathe on me.

    I’m outraged here.

    • Homple

      OUTTA HERE. Effing spell check.

    • commodious spittoon

      If you’re not outraged you’re not paying attention !! 1 1 !!! !1 1

      I hate that slogan.