Thursday Morning Links

by | Mar 26, 2020 | Daily Links | 617 comments

So the olympics are officially done until next year. And since Winged Foot was closed because of the NY government, the US Open might not be happening this year. Stupid virus.  And that’s sports for today.

Poet Robert Frost was born on this day. He shares it with fashion house founder Guccio Gucci, flamboyant playwright Tennessee Williams, American General William Westmoreland, actor Strother Martin, Star Trek actor Leonard Nimoy, first female SC Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, terrorist state leader Mahmoud Abbas, actor Alan Arkin, liquor aficionado and big-spender Nancy Pelosi, singer Diana Ross, comic genius Martin Short, and the ever-lovely Keira Knightley.

Knightley

Right, on to…the links!

Sounds like common sense to me. It’s called providing what people want rather than what activists are trying to force them to produce.

Let’s see if the markets can go for three in a row. Fingers crossed.

Live look at the Senate

Well, it’s unanimous: The Senate has officially lost its mind.

DOOM! DOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!! This is quite the departure from what DeBlasio was saying in February when he told everybody to ignore the chatter and go to a parade or a movie.

The politics of pettiness. I guess the people who work at all those properties can just fuck right off, right Chuck?

More Knightley

And lest we forget about the oil and gas industry. I’m shocked they’re behind the curve, to be honest. I’d have expected this to have happened a week or two ago.

Here you go. Hope you enjoy it like I will.

Now go have a great day, friends!

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

617 Comments

  1. UnCivilServant

    The Senate has officially lost its mind.

    I’m just glad its not as bad as it could have been.

    It’s time to make ballot harvesting a felony.

    • Fourscore

      That’s why it had to be unanimous. Can hide behind the others but at least no one will be able to take more credit than the others.

      My kids, when they were younger: “Well, Dad, we can just charge it on the credit card”.

      • Nephilium

        I can’t be broke, I haven’t run out of checks yet!

      • Festus

        Yep. Got a whole box of them hiding around here somewhere! Now where would I be if I were a box of checkbooks…

      • Red Pill Matt

        Hu

      • Private Chipperbot

        Wu

      • Chipwooder

        When my sister was young, she thought ATMs just spit out free money. Whenever our mother told us something was too expensive, she would say we should just get more money from the machine.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        I thought the same thing. “The bank just gives you money if you ask? Wow, that’s nice of them!” Wish Mom had gently schooled me.

    • AlexinCT

      I really am hating this world where the only choices we keep having is between bad and absolutely horrible, but I am with you UCS.

  2. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Are the Russians actually going to end up winning the oil war? How can they manage to pump it out for so cheap?

    • sloopyinca

      Looks like they might in the short term. American oil will ultimately be fine. The ME producers, OTOH, are definitely fucked for a while. Maybe for good. Which is a scary proposition.

      • Festus

        I kinda want them to go back to being hard-scrabble goat fuckers but not well-armed hateful, revengeful hard-scrabble goat fuckers.

      • AlexinCT

        Why is it scary if they no longer can hold the world hostage with their oil AND because of reduced income, end up having to stop doing a lot of the shit they do. I have loved the idea of making the ME China and Europe’s problem for a while….

    • PieInTheSky

      The question is what is Venezuela doing cause I though they had a lot of poorer quality oil

      • UnCivilServant

        Oh, Venezuela is boned. Their extractive infrastructure is so rotted from lack of maintenance, they’re lucky anything still comes out of the ground.

      • AlexinCT

        The reason their infrastructure is basically done for is that Chavez removed all the people that knew what they were doing and replaced them with cronies (collectivism 101: loyalty to the cause is more important than actual results) who then promptly demanded he deport the foreigners that did most of the heavy lifting for pointing out the system was now under inept management more interested in finding ways to enrich themselves (what they accuses the previous group that at least had the system working of doing, of all things as the justification to removing them) than getting the oil to flow so Chavez could keep playing El Santa Clause.

        Does nobody see that every single time these collectivist garner the support of the envious and disaffected to change things, what changes is who is robbing & fucking over the people and then to robbing & fucking them harder? Sure, you might get a initial effect that looks like there is positive change (especially from people hell bent to protect the racket and support the new masters) , but then, given enough time (and often almost immediately), things will fall apart, and fall apart fast.

        The Venezuelan poor now realize how horrible of a mistake Chavez was . His brave new world gave them hope for a few years, then plunged them into poverty levels that make what most of the poor had before worse. And the elite class that these poor people envied and were then motivated to support Chavez because of the promise he would change that, still exist, only with a different, albeit smaller, membership and an even wider gap between what they have and how they live, and the now poorer poor class.

        Viva la revolucion, putos!

    • R C Dean

      What counts as winning?

      The American oil biz has always been boom and bust. The Russian oil biz has always been, well, nationalized. I know which I am betting on to pull oil out of the ground cheaply in the long run.

      • creech

        What is it looking like in Midland/Odessa these days?

  3. Don Escaped Texas

    Tennessee Williams

    was born in Possum Town, MS

    This has been another DidjaKnowTheyWereFromMSupdate.
    We now return you to your regularly scheduled lynx.

    • robc

      Yes, I did.

    • leon

      Did you know that Lincoln wasn’t born in Illinois, but in Indiana. True story he grew up in South Bend. Went to Notre Dame and even played for their football team.

      • sloopyinca

        That’s a strange way to spell Kentucky.

      • leon

        Little known fact is that chain was later incorporated into the pool chain that Former Vice President Joe Biden used to fend off Corn Pop.

      • WTF

        “Listen fat…”

      • AlexinCT

        Magic chain (spoken in the enchanted Forrest Gump voice talking to Lt. Dan’s magic legs)!…

      • robc

        I used to drive by the Jefferson Davis Monument semi-irregularly. I meant to stop there and do an article for here based on the visit, but I never did it.

        Now, I live too far away.

      • Chipwooder

        I used to drive by Beauvoir, Davis’ last house, every now and then. It’s right down by the water in Biloxi. Got pretty well ruined by Katrina but they rebuilt it.

      • Private Chipperbot

        Speaking of that. Would anyone be interested in a photo centric story about MS and Katrina? I got some pretty cool stuff that was enough to get on CNN back in the day.

      • Chipwooder

        Sure.

        I would add my own pictures from the Gulf Coast between Gulfport and Pensacola at that time, but they got accidentally erased when we had a technician work on our computer in 2008. We lost basically all of the pictures we had from the first five years of our marriage. Still pisses me off.

      • Fourscore

        I even have an anecdote from Katrina

      • Fourscore

        But his hometown is in Nebraska, the capitol in fact. He’s a cornhusker and it shows.

      • leon

        A true All American. He’s loved in all 39 states!

    • Pope Jimbo

      Poor Mississippi. Anyone worth a shit immediately escapes to Memphis or NOLA and never acknowledges MS at all. Elvis was a great example of that.

      It is also what makes Memphis such a fun town. It is a huge goofball magnet that attracts all the riff-raff from MS, AL, KY and AR.

      • sloopyinca

        That can’t be true. Because if it attracted all the riff-raff from MS, then MS would be empty.

      • AlexinCT

        I see what you did there…..

      • Don Escaped Texas

        worked for me

        I’ll say it again: from Elvis to Oprah and from Kermit to Darth Vader, MS is the offensive line of American culture

      • Chipwooder

        I had a girlfriend who was born and raised in very rural Alabama once. Rural enough that she referred to nearby Geneva AL (population 4400) as “the big town”. She told me once, “God made Mississippi so Alabama could have someone to look down on.”

      • Festus

        Vancouver used to be like that. Used to be.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Yeah, now Vancouver (really, pretty much the whole Lower Mainland) thinks of its collective self as Paradise.

      • Festus

        Forty years ago it was, at least to my small town eyes.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        I spent a summer there in 1980, and then an academic year in 1982-83, before moving there for 4.5 years (November 2014 through June 2019). It’s always been expensive, but at least an entire generation of people there hadn’t been infected with rampant socialism forty years ago. It’s the kind of place a lot more people are thinking of moving away from, in line with the changing sentiments about many of the big municipalities (or entire states) along the West Coast of North America. The (unfunny) joke about the Lower Mainland is, no matter where you want to go, it’s at least an hour away by car. My spousal unit’s round-trip commute (on the train, no less!) was 2.5 hours/day.
        It sucked.

      • Gustave Lytton

        My great grandfather’s former farm is part of some multimillion dollar condo development between Surrey & Cloverdale. Hard to reconcile the reality with memories of childhood stories from my mom about her childhood visits there to “the country”.

  4. Nephilium

    /looks at Google Calendar

    /notices that they haven’t removed the MLB schedule

    Happy opening day quarantine day…

    • Don Escaped Texas

      I watched the AL tie-breaker from 1978 last night: NYY @ BOS.

      The year before I had watched the STL all-hands game in MEM, buying out a row of seats to take my best friends as I usually do.

      The slow drama of baseball is a perfect fit to Southern sensibilities; I’m left with no great traditions but whiskey.

      • Nephilium

        I put on a Wahoo shirt today… not that it really matters, but it’s the thought that counts, right?

      • Drake

        I couldn’t relive that childhood trauma.

      • Festus

        No golf at all?

      • Chipwooder

        My man Bucky fuckin’ Dent!

    • Brett L

      The Rays will have a distinct experience advantage playing games in empty stadiums.

    • Gender Traitor

      ::gazes sadly at Single A quarter-season tickets::

      • Festus

        Awww. Virtual hugs to you and Mr.GT. No touching!

      • Nephilium

        Best deal for us up here is the District tickets for the Indians. $15, with a $5 concession credit. Standing room only, so I wouldn’t take kids there, but I’m not concerned about that. On the bright side, if someone flakes out, you’re only out $10.

        We also learned that if there’s a raincheck, the $5 credit can be used at both the original game, and the replacement game.

        /remembers the make up game that the girlfriend and I were the only ones out of 6 who could make it.

      • Nephilium

        There’s quite a bit of baseball up here on the north coast. We’ve got the Indians (of course), the Lake County Captains, the Lake Erie Crushers (celebrating the well known wine country of Avon, OH), and the Akron Rubber Ducks. Picked up some season tickets to the Captains for my parents a couple years back (they lived in walking distance of the stadium). Never went in on any myself.

      • The Last American Hero

        No love for the Mudhens?

      • Nephilium

        I was trying to stick with the Cleveland area proper. I considered Akron pushing it. That’s like the people from Youngstown who way they’re from Cleveland.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        *nonchalantly adjust Iowa Cubs ball cap adorning author’s brain care housing group*

        I love minor league ball, single and triple A are the best. IMO Double A is either a brief stop on the way to the bigs for the five star talent or a off ramp for almost made it players, still a great time for a fraction of the cost of MLB games. I remember my dad teaching me how to score a game during a Clinton (IA) Giants game, single A club for San Francisco at the time. Good times.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      The good news is all the Cubs fans will have already gone home once it starts, so they won’t fill up Chase Field this year.

  5. leon

    The package would give direct payments to most Americans

    I want t not that this can be true and still mean that at 110 Million americans could get nothing.

    • leon

      Oh geeze. I need some breakfast.

      I want to note*

    • WTF

      But at least Kennedy Center is getting $25 million.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Their long municipal nightmare is over. Praise Be.

    • UnCivilServant

      Depends upon the tax year used, and if the formula hasn’t changed from the last iteration described in detail, I end up getting back between $775 and $965 of the money taken from me by the feds.

      Of course instead of ofsetting the return of stolen proprty, they’ll just borrow more to cover the daily profligacy.

      • WTF

        Hmm, what do my wife and I get? Let’s see, …carry the 2, ….Bupkis! We get bupkis!
        But at least politicians pet constituencies will be getting some graft.

    • Brett L

      I think you have to pay net taxes to qualify. At one point that was true.

      • WTF

        Although they have included a provision where lower-wage workers will actually get paid more on unemployment than they would while working. I’m sure that won’t create any perverse incentives.

      • AlexinCT

        Unintended!

      • Akira

        How much you want to bet that after the whole thing is over, the Democrats will try to keep all those benefits permanent? They’ll insist that it’s still needed since we’ll then be in a recession because of shuttering the economy, then they’ll just leave it there forever. If anyone tries to repeal it, the media will call them heartless monsters who want to “take money away from working families”.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Nope, refundable credits.

  6. Fourscore

    Now I guess all those congress people will resign in a couple years if things don’t improve? I’m holding the MN congress folks personally responsible for the adding stuff onto my credit card without getting my approval.

    I’m a funny guy but not in a haha sort of way.

  7. leon

    The politics of pettiness. I guess the people who work at all those properties can just fuck right off, right Chuck?

    Trump wouldn’t be rich if people refused to do business with him. Really all of those people are the immoral enablers of Trump.

    • sloopyinca

      How is this even legal? I could see banning relief to any private entity owned and operated by a member, but their family members? That smacks of an equal protection violation, seeing as none of those family members ever voluntarily sought out political office.
      “Sorry the guy who owns your company is the son of a politician. Now go get back in the bread line, fucko.”

      • WTF

        Well, since the constitution is a dead letter, legal is whatever they say it is. Because FYTW.

      • AlexinCT

        You can bet they will not call out anyone other than bad orange man and his people but will turn a blind eye to all team blue members. I am waiting to see this play out just like every other proggie grandstanding effort: they will demand blood until it is more of their own being brought to the sacrificial altar, and then, the whole thing will quietly die down.

      • westernsloper

        “Senate Democratic Leader Chuck Schumer has secured a provision in the agreement that will prohibit businesses controlled by the President, Vice President, Members of Congress, and heads of Executive Departments from receiving loans or investments from Treasury programs. The children, spouses and in-laws of the aforementioned principals are also included in this prohibition.”

        I am torn on this but at least they did not single out the executive branch. That is if you can believe Schumer, which I have not done my entire life.

      • sloopyinca

        I really want a congressman or woman to resign right after this passes and hold a press conference and say “I’m doing this so the X number of people who work for my child’s company I’ve never been involved in won’t get fucked over and will be able to secure relief like the Kennedy Center, who has assets in excess of half a billion dollars. And that they may some day be able to get a raise again like Congress voted for themselves in the relief bill.”

      • westernsloper

        Ya, I heard about that raise thing. Bit of a pisser. And I would love to see all of congress resign…….I imagine family members of congress are more likely to be in political campaigns or consulting of their family member and that is how they get rich. Or run non profits that get grants for noble purposes. I see where you are coming from.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Assholes should be cutting their pay like some execs of struggling industries in the real world are doing.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        That would require they hold any principle at all besides holding on to power.

      • cyto

        They didn’t say squat about key donors though.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I’m sure the Clinton Foundation was also included. Because fair is fair.

      • leon

        Burisma was, but then Hunter stepped down from the Board of Directors.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It’s interesting how this prohibition applies to congress and a litany of others as well but it’s being spinned as being specific to Trump. Congressmen who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.

      • cyto

        It says “controlled by”.

        That’s a pretty strong word. That would make Trump properties count. But not any of Joe Biden’s family sweetheart deals. Your kid has a do-nothing board position or consulting gig for millions? Probably not control. So it doesn’t count.

        So this really only affects Trump and maybe someone who’s an heiress. I’m thinking they tailored the language to exclude their payoff methods while making sure to stick it to Trump.

        Two trillion is a major butt-load of money. The amount of graft floating off of this thing is going to be epic.

  8. leon

    Why does the Chicago Sun have a bloody butthole as their logo?

    • Don Escaped Texas

      man, you’re on a roll: what’dya put in your coffee ?

      • leon

        I woke up with a certain pep to my step today. Must have been the night terrors.

    • Festus

      Because the sun shines out of their ass?

    • cyto

      Butthole Sun, won’t you come…
      and wash away the rain…
      Butthole Sun, won’t you come, won’t you come….

      • Slammer

        *golf clap*

      • Festus

        Bravo!

  9. Private Chipperbot

    WaPo sics the mob on twitter lawyer with 356 followers…

    On Sunday night, McMillan, a 56-year-old lawyer in La Mesa, Calif., near San Diego, saw President Trump’s tweet about how “WE CANNOT LET THE CURE BE WORSE THAN THE PROBLEM ITSELF.” The lawyer took to Twitter to add his own two cents:

    “The fundamental problem is whether we are going to tank the entire economy to save 2.5% of the population which is (1) generally expensive to maintain, and (2) not productive.”

    At which point, McMillan instantly became Scrooge, a “ghoul,” an advocate for the death of 8.2 million Americans. Within minutes, he was trending on Twitter, and not in a good way.

    • leon

      Look random people are the best people to vilify. They have little to no power to defend themselves. I mean do you want the media to go after actually powerful people? Ha! You’re the first guy to make me laugh.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s certainly not fair to go after media outlets. They’re innocents.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      A valid point not put particularly well. That 2.5 percent of the population can be protected without tanking the economy by isolating the vulnerable only and letting the rest of us get back to work. Reopening for business isn’t synonymous with condemning grandma and grandpa to death.

      • leon

        Reopening for business isn’t synonymous with condemning grandma and grandpa to death.

        It turns out that the only people who wanted to reopen were those who stood to inherit. This news saddens them.

    • Don Escaped Texas

      3M jobs

      (how could it be otherwise?)

      I don’t find a link yet

    • Rufus the Monocled

      These are the same people who will fall for China’s charm offensive. Notice how they’re trying to wrestle power from America while we deal with this. That’s the ethics of this authoritarian communist regime. They start it, don’t take responsibility, blame others, play good samaritan and PROFIT!

      If there’s one thing this pandemic has shown me is just how unbelievably naive the West is when it comes to China. We correctly held the line with the Soviet empire but China is still a worse scourge if you ask me. We’re showing no signs of willing to stand up to them.

      The only person willing to do it is Trump. But he won’t be able to get Western allies on board to orchestrate a fight. They’re too busy cracking down on ‘online hate speech’ against China like they’re doing in Germany. Nope. USA will have recruit more sober countries like Russia, Japan, India and perhaps Korea and Australia to deal with China and begin the process of reducing dependency on them.

      In November, it’s vital Americans who grasp this vote for Trump. Quarrelsome Libertarians as well. NOW is the time to close ranks.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Russia sees themselves as a partner to China: They provide the raw materials and project military power while China acts as a manufacturing base. Putin might hedge his bets so the Chinese don’t upset the balance too much but we won’t be able to reliably count on him or the Russians.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        They do share a border. Yeh, maybe I overshot it with Russia but they should be leaned on to at least mediate.

      • creech

        I seem to recall Joe Biden calling Trump “xenophobic” when he first banned travelers from China when the Chinavirus thing started to ramp up.
        A clip of that should make a real nice Trump ad in November.

    • R C Dean

      “The fundamental problem is whether we are going to tank the entire economy to save 2.5% of the population which is (1) generally expensive to maintain, and (2) not productive.”

      I will say, I am nott super comfortable with the implication that some people are worth incurring high costs to save, and some people are not.

      Once you start down the road of saying “we” will save people because of their value to society (“productive”) but not others, you are treating people as means to an end, not as people with inherent value. It’s profoundly amoral, IMO.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        What are your thoughts on the discussion over blanket DNR orders for people over a certain age with the virus?

      • R C Dean

        I am going toe to toe with our ethics committee this very day to tell them such things are illegal in the US, and that you have to have consent to put a DNR order on someone.

        They want to justify them based on the risk of the physician of getting infected v. the likelihood the patient will survive for long. Fine, convince the patient/family to take one for Team Physician. Otherwise, get your ass in there and save the fucking patient.

        It’s their ventilator triage plan that really pissed me off. They want to allocate them based on the patients “instrumental value to society”, a chilling phrase that pretty overtly treats people as nothing more than a means to an end. It’s amoral utilitarianism, which I find vile.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        They want to allocate them based on the patients “instrumental value to society”

        *shudders*

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Usually means “politicians, actors, and athletes first”.

      • R C Dean

        Yes, that is a direct quote. Taken from Ezekiel Emmanuel’s article on this topic in the NEJM, I believe.

      • invisible finger

        “Ability to pay” would have been honest. But that would have eliminated so many bureaucrats that sacrifice so much for society already…

      • straffinrun

        “instrumental value to society”

        Shitposting count?

      • Festus

        Oh dear. I think I saw this flick on TCM the other night. It was from the late 30’s-early 40’s… Started with “Third something or other”…

      • leon

        RC I want to let you know that reading this, you are fighting the good fight. Every day each of us are embroiled in the battle against tyranny and evil. we are primed to think that it is only in Epic struggles that great battles are won, but it is the little, everyday battles that guard us. Stay strong!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Seconded

      • Gustave Lytton

        Thirded. Came here to say the same. Thank you for taking care of your patients and employees.

      • Festus

        They got their wish and some people are living and dying by it now. If I’m a burden my personal choice is to check out quickly but that’s just me. What about those other fearful folk that want to see their Grandkids one more time?

      • westernsloper

        “instrumental value to society”

        Holy fuck! When did normal people even start talking this way. That is commi talk. That honestly scares me.

      • straffinrun

        BlockYoYoMa’s mama!

      • Not Adahn

        She’s gotta be dead by now.

      • RAHeinlein

        If the medical system is overwhelmed a triage scenario should be executed.

      • westernsloper

        It has always been so when overwhelmed. Especially first responders to large scenes with many casualties, but Is the system overwhelmed now? I finally heard hospital numbers in CO. 142 in the state as of this morning. It may get overwhelmed in some places eventually, but I think we are way the hell and gone from that point right now.

      • westernsloper

        Plus, triage is set up on a rational thought system of, “I have a better chance of saving person A than person B”, so A gets the attention. We have never ever thought about a persons instrumental value to society.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        Yeah, to me this just looks like sloppy thinking got the best of some of those folks: “I have a better chance of saving person A than person B” is a perfectly moral stance. That older folks tend to fill up B is natural; that’s a far cry from euthanizing Downs patients.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        “instrumental value to society”

        One must be very, very educated to hear a suggestion for bald-faced evil and think “yeah, that’s a good idea.”

        Ask them if this will be too hard to figure out on a case by case basis, and to be safe just assume it won’t be the mentally defective, jews, Roma, Jehovah’s Witnesses, and homosexuals who lack instrumentality. Or should it be more expansive and include members of the Confessional Church, Soviet commissars, and people who are insufficiently supportive of the Nazi party.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        I think I might have a double negative in there…

      • AlexinCT

        The current approach of saving those most in need also is a means to an end: buying votes from those most likely to reward you for throwing crumbs their way….

    • straffinrun

      Hogg hates the Chicoms. Idiot kid, but got that right.

    • Chipwooder

      Maybe there’s hope for L’il Piglet yet?

      Who am I kidding – he’s at Harvard. No hope at all.

      • Festus

        Unfocused hatred is the slow-acting poison. He’ll be “Carradined” within the next few years.

      • sloopyinca

        Until he’s able to grasp the fact that the CCP maintains their iron grip of control because the citizens are disarmed, then he’s going to continue being an idiot.

        Man, there’s not a group of people out there, aside from the Norks, that I pity more than the Chinese. 1.6 billion slaves to the CCP. That’s so incredibly sad.

    • Slammer

      The other twitter gem from yesterday: Nate Silver breaking down new detected virus cases by states that went for Trump and Clinton. Got wrecked in the comments.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        What possible insight could one glean from such an analysis?

      • R C Dean

        Proof that Gaia hates deplorables and sent Her virus to kill them?

      • Agent Cooper

        It’s worse in blue states, though. (NY, CA, IL)

      • invisible finger

        But those are all Trump’s fault.

      • Rhywun

        Region war!

  10. straffinrun

    SSo, Sloop isn’t going to give one of his snappy adjectives to describe Westmoreland? I’ve got a few in mind.

    • sloopyinca

      I couldn’t think of one vile enough to do him justice. Maybe I’ll call my dad today and ask if he can.

      Spoiler alert: he can.

      • straffinrun

        Let’s be generous and start with “zealous”.

      • sloopyinca

        He was zealous on the number of people he sent there but not too zealous when setting the ROEs for Cobra pilots.
        “Monitor this treeline filled with VC anti-aircraft units. Now they have heat-seekers, but you can’t engage with your rockets or miniguns unless fired upon.”

        On a completely unrelated note, it was possible to open the canopy and fire your sidearm from one in order to draw fire from an enemy so you could then turn the Forest they were hiding in into kindling.

      • AlexinCT

        Yeah, when you put other people in harms way and force them to follow ROE that are downright idiotic, expect that the only thing it will do is embolden the enemy and cost good people their lives or livelihood.

      • creech

        Maybe this is a good place to insert an ROE type tidbit I read yesterday.
        As the Japs were attacking Pearl Harbor, pilot George Welch jumped in his fighter plane and, with the aid of another pilot,
        managed to shoot down four of the Jap planes. He was recommended for the Medal of Honor. But it was denied because he took off without being ordered to take off!

    • juris imprudent

      I’ve worked with US Army TRADOC for a number of years and couldn’t understand how they could be such a hopelessly f***ed up organization. Then I read in McMaster’s book that Westmoreland appointed his lackey DuPuy to stand up the organization (as part of the post Viet Nam Army reform). Oh, now it all makes sense.

      I think the only roughly contemporaneous general that might be worse than Westmoreland was Taylor.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I go to the TRADOC headquarters once in a while. One thing is for certain, they know how to burn thru money.

        The TRADOC band has a brand new facility with granite tiles adorning the walls and high end furnishings.

      • invisible finger

        I like to point those things out when someone goes on a rant about the Vatican’s actions 500 years ago.

      • Chipwooder

        Depends on how you define roughly contemporaneous, but I submit Ned Almond’s name.

      • juris imprudent

        Oh there are lots of lousy combat commanders, I was thinking more along the lines of those who end up in the top leadership slots. The damage they do there is truly remarkable.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And McMaster has become one of the deep state swamp creatures that his book was against. Somewhat fitting.

      • juris imprudent

        Yeah, that whole assignment was karma to the n-th degree.

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Don’t leave out MacNamarra. That asshat thought that he could win a war by applying manufacturing methodologies and comparing birth rates and casualty rates.

      Yeah dickhead, we did did that already it was called the First World War. Shoveling the flower of Europe’s youth into a meat grinder was the cost of that victory.

  11. Festus

    Great linx, Sloop! The Kiera ones are much appreciated! Gas just dropped to 73.9 cents/litre up here. Hasn’t been that low in twenty years.

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      54.9 cents/litre here in Edmonton. It’s practically free.

      • Festus

        70.9 now. We don’t have the draconian taxes that Vancouver has but I’ll take it. Keeps on going this way they might reach 31.9 like when I was a gas jockey in 1980.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Given inflation since 1980, I wouldn’t be surprised if the gas price now, deflated to 1980 dollars, is actually lower per litre than back then. Amazing what a negative demand shock will do, eh?

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Just did the calc. 54.9 cents/litre now is roughly equivalent to 17.7 cents/litre back in 1980.
        Yeah, gasoline’s dirt-cheap right now.

      • sloopyinca

        Ok, this retarded sub thread has gone on long enough. Gasoline is sold by the gallon! If you flappy-heads don’t have the decency to convert to freedom units on here, you should open your own website. Glibourtarians.ca is probably available.

      • Festus

        Stealing that!

      • Festus

        We’ll keep the Rush, you can have the Bon Jovi. Deal?

      • sloopyinca

        New Jersey is like America’s appendix. We don’t even count them. Thankfully that means Springsteen goes along with JBJ.

        Also, you silly bastards are also stuck with Bryan Adams and Alanis Morisette.

        ::cranks up Hank Williams, Jr::

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        *YAWN*
        Yeah yeah, ‘Murica, freedom units, we get it. Would you like some Grey-Poupon to go with that steaming pile of what used to be a dead horse?

      • Jarflax

        We Muricans don’t eat none of that faggy French mustard! We use French’s mustard!

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Heh.

      • Nephilium

        Jarflax: What, no love for Bermans? My dad used to say it was the only reason the Indians had anyone go to the stadium back in the 80’s.

      • Jarflax

        That would have ruined the joke.

    • juris imprudent

      the ever-lovely Keira Knightley

      Yeah, apparently SP hasn’t chatted with Banjos about rusty can lids.

      • Festus

        Women talk. This is known…

      • Festus

        Snazzy!

  12. Scruffy Nerfherder

    The bill would provide one-time direct payments to Americans of $1,200 per adult making up to $75,000 a year, and $2,400 to a married couple making up to $150,000, with $500 payments per child.

    Great. I can afford some TP now,

    • leon

      Told the wife we should have had more kids.

    • straffinrun

      Make 74k and you get the same as someone making 15k?

    • Drake

      So maybe my kid gets something.

    • UnCivilServant

      Does it still taper off to 0 at 99k?

      • robc

        Looks like it does.

      • straffinrun

        As crazy as this sounds, I trust robc more than the media. Explain.

      • AlexinCT

        You have paid attention to the shitshow that passes for media and robc is neither as partisan a hack nor as mentally deranged as them?

        What did I win????

      • robc

        You may be wrong on that latter part.

    • AlexinCT

      I am one of those people getting nuttin (as usual) and expected to foot the bill. At least my kid makes too little since he is too young and will get his check.

      • creech

        Me too. I might be able to close the Bank of Dad for a while, though.

      • AlexinCT

        Lucky for me I have not had to be a bank for the kid. He is real good managing his money compared to most of his peers.

    • Agent Cooper

      We don’t qualify. I don’t want anyone else’s money anyways.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      Let’s do the math…

      2,400 + 500 + 500 + 500 = Two rolls of toilet paper and a beef stick in couple years.

    • Chipwooder

      You know what we need now? To do this continuously for the next year. If it saves just one more life……

      • AlexinCT

        You see the provision in that Christmas in March present they just passed that increases unemployment pay for people that is sure to make a whole lot of people find a way to go file for unemployment because under this new provision in the bill they can make more money that way than staying employed?

      • Chipwooder

        Indeed I did. Madness.

      • WTF

        Then they can point to the unemployment rate not recovering and shriek “ORANGEMANBAD!!!”
        To say nothing of creating a bigger constituency of government dependents.

      • AlexinCT

        They always have a plan, act angry and accuse those pointing out the effect of being haters, but when the shit happens for real as predicted, act as if they are surprised. They meant well!

      • Fourscore

        Too bad all the hotels/motels are closed, unemployed people would /could take a vacation.

        Suicides/drug use may increase as unemployment lingers, however

    • RAHeinlein

      Federal and state UI rate increases coming to a business near you.

  13. westernsloper

    Hey Mad Scientist, thanks for the router tip yesterday. The way they have this process set up I now see what you are talking about. I am not sure my little router would be too jumpy on start up since it is a little router, the problem is the stripped out depth adjustment. That was always the weak link in older small routers. Looks like a new router is in my future! Hope you see this before you get to Mad Scientisting for the day.

  14. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Spoke to friend who’s an flight attendant last night. He’s convinced he had the virus back in February before the alarm bells went off. This crap has been circulating for awhile now.

    Got lucky, he’s 67.

    • Chipwooder

      I wouldn’t be shocked to discover that I had it in January, when I was sick as a dog and assumed I had the flu, but where I would have gotten it I have no idea.

    • Festus

      Wifey works at the airport. They’ve cut back so much that the staff is doing half-time until May. The company is still paying full time. Who the fuck comes to the rescue when the piper demands payment?

      • R C Dean

        You, comrade. It’s always you.

  15. PieInTheSky

    Day 3 of not leaving the apartment. It’s okay but I like going out occasionally. Especially no gym is annoying.

    • PieInTheSky

      Romania just passed 1000 cases.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Total cases remains small percentage wise. But the economic havoc this is causing because of the fear of how fast it spreads is large.

        Observing China, it’s hard not to think this may have been planned. /Alex Jones hacking cough.

      • AlexinCT

        Planned or not, it was their attempt to cover it up that has left us where we are today, and thus, they sure as hell are to blame,

      • See Double You

        The Coronapocalypse has officialy come to my rural county. Guy in his sixties who’s been ordered to quarantine at home. I’m waiting for the governor to issue his SIP order. The state bar says it will lobby like hell to get us lawyers on the “essential” list. We’ll see.

      • Not Adahn

        What a Grim Milestone!

      • PieInTheSky

        Meh no one knows for sure. Probably the minister decided he had enough and he did not want to do this anymore. No one knows what goes on the inside.

        The guy always had a rocky tenure, although it is less than a year long. He was a top surgeon at a private hospital (the kind who did some first in the world vascular surgery) not necessarily a bureaucrat. He also wanted to introduce more private options in the system. He was always accused of being a stooge for “rapacious private interests” who wants to privatize the system and working private, he had conflict of interest. Which is sort of true but then again meh. The system in Romania is mostly government and complete shit. Corrupt, full of theft and graft with disastrous outcomes. But no right thinking people would even consider more private involvement.

        Then again the private hospitals responded poorly – generally rejecting corona patients – to the coronavirus further convincing people that they only care about profit (irrelevant as long as they deliver the goods). Off course, given the legal regulatory environment, they have every incentive to avoid the corona. But they would have gained a lot of good will by being more prepared than the state sector.

        It is a long story.

  16. Don Escaped Texas

    too local but so weird: area woman murdered by same guy who killed her mother and cousin years ago

    Martha McKay of Hughes, Arkansas, was stabbed to death Wednesday in her Horseshoe Lake home, which she operated as a bed and breakfast. Her apparent assailant, who broke into the house, was Travis Lewis, the same man who had recently been paroled from prison after serving a lengthy term for the double murder in 1996 of McKay’s mother, Sally McKay, and her first cousin Lee Baker, a well-known Memphis musician.

    She was a Snowden, one of the prominent MEM families. It’s so weird . . . . even for us wheels-off types from MS.

    • Festus

      Enh. I know a family wherein the Brother shot dead another Brother and is implicated in a bunch of serial killings along the “Highway of Tears”. I knew another guy, hare-lipped fellow, that murdered his parents for his inheritance. Plenty of stories like that. Some people are just born to kill. Doesn’t need to be a conspiracy.

      • Festus

        In fact, I saw that first killer while in Court for an unrelated matter and he was able to convince the judge to take his side on what sounded like a pretty brutal domestic violence charge. No lawyer, just him and the Crown. Guy didn’t skip a beat. One of those people that set off your “spidey-sense”.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        killer whale in court ?

        * rereads *

        oh . . . that makes more sense; I was going to guess it was some Canuck thing, but checks out

      • Anti Pro State

        I think my reply may have gone to moderation because of a link. Anyway, picture in your mind a comic; Orca on the stand. Prosecuting Lawyer Sea Lion “Would you please tell the court what type of whale you are, exactly?” Defense attorney Dolphin :”Objection”

      • UnCivilServant

        Orcas are Dolphins, not whales.

      • UnCivilServant

        *nevermind the vernacular name of Killer Whale, they’re dolphins

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Sounds like a person with a vendetta against the family for some reason. At least he’s gone to his just reward.

      • AlexinCT

        He just wanted to finish the job….

  17. bacon-magic

    25 million for the Kennedy Arts Center? They can’t stop. The corruption is too deep. They are the worst disease we have.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      It’s mind boggling and shameless to the point of immorality.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Did Ilhan Whoremar get her present of canceling the student debt?

      • bacon-magic

        I don’t think so.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        My question to the people who run the Kennedy Arts Center would be: Are you seriously going to take this money as people suffer?

        If there’s just ONE good soul in there they say, ‘Hey man. This is crazy. Donate the money to a hospital’.

        When the Atalanta tifosi couldn’t travel to Valencia for the second leg of the Champions League, they gave the 40 000 Euros travel expenses to a local hospital in Bergamo.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The people who run the KAC are completely oblivious to the realities that everyone else is dealing with, otherwise they wouldn’t be running the KAC.

        It’s like the uber-wealthy that are fleeing with the virus to the Hamptons and going directly to the local clinics there. They don’t give a shit about the little people, never have, never will.

      • invisible finger

        Most of the people who run the KAC vote Dem. Didn’t want to keep them from putting their snouts in the trough just because they exceeded the income threshold.

    • Slammer

      All of those “grants” are just collection points where the money is going to be taken and distributed to the machine that keeps reelecting the pols

    • AlexinCT

      I bet a huge chunk of that money (if not all of it) ends up in team blue campaign coffers. That’s what this specific payout was allocated to make happen from the beginning….

  18. Rebel Scum

    Bitches can’t be trusted.

    An Atlanta man thought he was going to meet a woman for a date, but instead found himself in a shootout with strangers in his home Wednesday morning. According to Fox 5 in Atlanta, Tikoyo Lamonz Reeves connected with a woman on an online dating site, and invited her over to hang out. When she got there, she had brought along two uninvited guests; a woman who came in the front door with her, and a man who snuck in the back of the home armed with a rifle.

    Atlanta Police Captain F. Turker says the Reeves’ dog began barking at the armed man, alerting the homeowner to the fact that there were actually three strangers in his home, and he grabbed his gun and exchanged fire with the home invader.

    According to police, the two women and the would-be robber took off.

    “The victim told us he believes one of the women may have also been hit by a bullet,” Captain Turner said.

    Police are searching for the two women and the would-be robber.

    “This was a set up and we will be following leads to find out who these people are,” Captain Turner said.

    Medics took Reeves to a local hospital in stable condition.

    • leon

      Has anyone checked Cardi B’s alibi?

    • AlexinCT

      If all they wanted to do was rob his ass, they could have made him go somewhere to meet his woman and then break in when he was away. This sounds like they were looking to get him specifically. Then again, I am assuming these geniuses actually had smarts, and it could just e they are not that bright.

      • WTF

        Many criminals are not very bright, it’s why the cops can actually catch them.

      • PieInTheSky

        Call me old fashioned but , if a woman gonna rob a guy she should at least suck his dick first as way if distracting him

      • AlexinCT

        Not old fashioned at all Pie. Instrumental and simply good behavior….

      • AlexinCT

        What? No skin flute jokes?

      • Fatty Bolger

        I agree, something else was up with this besides just a simple home robbery.

  19. Rebel Scum

    Super awkward or Penthouse-worthy?

    Ernest Hemingway once spent several weeks in self-isolation with his sick toddler, his wife, nanny, and his mistress. So yes, you too can survive this quarantine, America.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      This condescending tripe drives me up a wall. I’m not concerned with “surviving” quarantine. I’m concerned with the authoritarian government tanking the economy and putting me and my family into the poor house in a misguided attempt to stomp on a pandemic of dubious seriousness.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        So you’re unemployed and living in a tent you pitched under a bridge overpass… just be glad you’re alive, asshole.

        Yeah, it’s getting old.

      • leon

        a tent you pitched under a bridge overpass

        They did say public sex was becoming more common…

      • ChipsnSalsa

        Put that on a cross stitch sampler above the mantle

    • RAHeinlein

      Thanks for a link that made me smile!

      /Hemingway fan

      • straffinrun

        Only a few us of us here. Cheers to that.

      • Chipwooder

        I like Hemingway, too. I hate florid prose. Much prefer terse, spare writing. It’s one of the reasons I like Cormac McCarthy.

    • Slammer

      The Old Man and the Three (and a half)

      • Slammer

        The Old Man and the Three(some) is better

      • AlexinCT

        Gonna write me that book… Think they will call it plagiarism if I keep the whole sea motif in there and have it happen on a fishing boat?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      LOL

      All those asshats out there screaming that the USA is has a third world healthcare system because it didn’t send assistance to other countries (which is untrue anyway) are going to be eating their words.

    • straffinrun

      Remember when they were saying masks don’t work and you shouldn’t buy them because the health professionals need them? I do.

      • invisible finger

        I’ll never forget that.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        I’ll wear a mask if *I* get sick. Otherwise, not.

      • straffinrun

        They work both ways. As long as you handle them correctly, you decrease your odds of getting it. If you don’t mind getting it (which might not be bad in the big picture), don’t wear one.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And in this current situation where you can pass the virus on when you are presymptomatic/asymptomatic, wearing a mask to prevent onward spread would be a good thing.

      • Gustave Lytton

        You want an add on? Prior to current year, the CDC was recommending wearing masks in public by the general public as part of a flu pandemic response. The FDA approved several different manufacturers’ no fit test needed, ok for general public use in a public health emergency masks.

        But… when masks were running low, the advice abruptly changed…

        Also, the national strategic stockpile built up a stockpile of masks but those were mostly used during the H1N1 pandemic and never replaced. Stockpile at the time, and until 2 years ago, was ran by the CDC… too busy studying gun violence or coke on mice or whatever.

  20. Swiss Servator

    Look what just popped into my email…

    CLASSIFICATION: UNCLASSIFIED

    Army Announces Voluntary Recall of Retired Soldiers for COVID-19 Response

    The U.S. Army is reaching out to gauge the interest of our retired officers, noncommissioned officers and Soldiers who would be willing to assist with the COVID-19 coronavirus pandemic response effort should their skills and expertise be required.

    These extraordinary challenges require equally extraordinary solutions and that’s why we’re turning to you — trusted professionals capable of operating under constantly changing conditions. When the Nation called — you answered, and now, that call may come again.

    If interested and you remain qualified to serve in any of the following health care specialties: 60F: Critical Care Officer; 60N: Anesthesiologist; 66F: Nurse Anesthetist; 66S: Critical Care Nurse; 66P: Nurse Practitioner; 66T: ER Nurse; 68V: Respiratory Specialist; 68W: Medic – we need to hear from you STAT!

    If you are working in a civilian hospital or medical facility, please let us know. We do not want to detract from the current care and treatment you are providing to the Nation.

    While this is targeted at medical specialties, if you are interested in re-joining the team and were in a different specialty, let us know your interest.

    If interested please contact Human Resources Command, Reserve Personnel Management Directorate, at usarmy.knox.hrc.mbx.rpmd-ord-hq@mail.mil and provide your phone number, address, email, and MOS/Branch.

    CLASSIFICATION: UNCLASSIFIED

    • leon

      If it means you have to go to Fort Knox – DON’T DO IT!

    • invisible finger

      Yesterday afternoon, around 2pm I ran an errand and went for a bit longer drive than necessary and had to wait to get onto Irving Park Rd while a convoy of 9-10 National Guard vehicles went west (going to O’Hare I presumed).

      • Swiss Servator

        Or Fort McCoy, or any number of places.

    • straffinrun

      These extraordinary challenges require equally extraordinary solutions and that’s why we’re turning to you — trusted professionals capable of operating under constantly changing conditions. When the Nation called — you answered, and now, that call may come again.

      At least they tried to butter you up.

      • kinnath

        Last Tango?

      • kinnath

        *takes a bow*

        thanks

    • sloopyinca

      “voluntary”

      Let’s hope it stays that way.

    • Slammer

      “if you are interested in re-joining the team and were in a different specialty, let us know your interest.”

      Reminds me of Chef in Apocalypse Now when he had the breakdown after the tiger…”I just wanted to learn to cook, man! I just wanted to learn to cook!”

      • Swiss Servator

        I dunno…O-5 pay sounds good to me…Housing allowance, subsistence…

        /Tax leech

    • AlexinCT

      Looks like they are looking for people with medical know how? And taking them out of the civilian population where they are likely now critical seems like a real weird thing to do.

      • Swiss Servator

        I don’t think anyone currently employed in the civilian healthcare sector would bite….now, if you were unemployed, or were doing something else, but not critical…why not?

      • AlexinCT

        So this means that the people likely to go for this will need to be trained before they can actually be put to use, right? By the time that training is completed we will all be living Steven King’s “The Stand” or complaining how our inept political class destroyed the global economy panicking over what amounts to nothing more than another contagious case of flu that the Chicomms gifted the world with because f their totalitarian need to keep up their public image.

      • Swiss Servator

        Refresher training only – you have to have been qualified to get the MOS.

      • AlexinCT

        Ah, OK. That makes a difference.

      • dbleagle

        I got that email yesterday. If they start looking for 60 yo special operations types to “rejoin the team” it is time to head to the hills.

    • Fourscore

      Ol’ Fourscore gets a second chance! Now if I can remember what I did with my keys I’ll hop in the car and head out, unless I get stopped for making an unessential trip.

      Mrs Fourscore, from the top of the stairs: “Don’t forget to put on your pants this time, if you’re going to the store”

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I remember when they called me saying I needed to report to Davis – Monathan AFB for an inactive reserve muster. I told them I couldn’t get the time off work and hung up. They didn’t call back.

      • Private Chipperbot

        I’m sticking with a baseball theme today.

        Are you Lou Brown?

      • Gustave Lytton

        I was accidentally separated completed when I transferred/was supposed to transfer to the IRR. Didn’t know it for over a year until I got orders un-separating me and sticking me in IRR. Except they screwed up and put me in the annual training group instead of the non-AT pool.

        About a month or two before my service obligation expired entirely (thankfully, they didn’t extend that due to their separation fuck up), some SFC in USAR HR sent out a letter asking me to call him to schedule my annual training. My service obligation ended in April, and AT isn’t due until the end of the fiscal year (Sep 30 for non-gov types)…. so I ignored it and a follow up and let the clock run out. Figured it was easier than calling up and trying to get my IRR status fixed.

  21. ScoobaSteve

    Fun Fact: Keira Knightly starred in a movie called “The Hole” in which she flashed ’em titties. 16 year old titties.

    • AlexinCT

      But not flashing the hole?

    • Chipwooder

      That’s nothing – Night Moves had multiple nude scenes for a 16 year old Melanie Griffith. Not just topless, nude.

      • Festus

        “Walkabout”! When you see a film like that at 7-8 years old your life’s course is set. That is all

    • Agent Cooper

      16 year old titties.

      Did anyone notice? She’s not very well endowed. But she is a durn pretty gal.

    • Festus

      Membered. Also Thora Birch. I don’t understand why I used to watch dumb movies on TV for hours on end.

  22. Rebel Scum

    The truly scary thing about WuFlu.

    During her 12:00 p.m. ET hour show on Wednesday, MSNBC anchor Andrea Mitchell revealed her greatest fear amid the coronavirus pandemic – Donald Trump’s approval ratings going up. She fretted over likely Democratic nominee Joe Biden “having difficulty” getting his message out during the crisis and support for the President “skyrocketing.”

    Turning to former Obama administration official Jim Messina, Mitchell anxiously noted: “There is politics involved. We’ve heard very little from, for instance, the more likely, most likely nominee of the Democratic Party, Joe Biden. He’s having difficulty getting – projecting through this crisis as the campaign goes totally on hold.”

    […]

    We’re also seeing some polls indicating the President’s approval ratings among Democrats and independents skyrocketing to their highest levels yet. Some 60% approval ratings for the way he’s handling this crisis as he continues to hold these briefings. The briefings are working for the President.

    In frustration, she added: “No matter what he says, people seem to be seeing him as a leader, at least more people do.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      JFC, these people are deranged.

      • AlexinCT

        All they have to do is report facts and not be total partisan hacks. What irks them is that they used to be able to control what the people got to know when they were the only gatekeepers, and now, people not only have choices, but after 3 plus years of active effort to help the most venal and disgusting people try to run a soft coup against the man a rebellious populous managed to elect despite their efforts to rig an election, can no longer do so.

      • juris imprudent

        Yeah, the honesty of dropping all pretenses is shocking.

    • leon

      for instance, the more likely, most likely nominee of the Democratic Party, Joe Biden.

      She was right the first time. Joe Biden is the more likely between him and Sanders.

    • AlmightyJB

      Greatest fear? Wow.

    • bacon-magic

      They are actually fucking rooting for the Wuhan virus to bring him down. They are evil.

    • Chipwooder

      Damn…..she might be the least self-aware person on Earth.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        And the left media still loves her. It’s mind-boggling.

      • AlexinCT

        Stupid is what the left seems to love…

    • Drake

      Wow.

      My favorite of the many hilarious replies: “Umm you do know that you’re you, don’t you?”

      • AlmightyJB

        “There’s nothing wrong with hugging first, Katie. You don’t have to just dive right in.”

        I liked this one too:)

    • Slammer

      The most disgusting thing about her was her bong. Who lets a bong get that filthy… horrible

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That and her bare ass on the couch, leaving dingleberries for the next guest.

  23. Raven Nation

    Dow futures are down

    • RAHeinlein

      Keep up, Raven, keep up.

      • Raven Nation

        Well, I read Sloopy’s line but didn’t read the whole link.

        Or maybe I missed something else?

      • RAHeinlein

        Just being cheeky – Down futures were up when you commented, and markets are now open with Dow up over 300.

      • Raven Nation

        Ahh, well played!

    • AlmightyJB

      S&P wants to be around 2400. Unless we start seeing major companies shutting their doors for good, then all bets are off. End the madness.

    • straffinrun

      He’s mostly right. They’ll send a pittance to you compared to what they send the big boys.

      • AlexinCT

        But hat’s how fascism – which is socialism – works: government, instead of owning the means of production, and thus the fault when things indubitably go wrong (see any marxist country), now only picks winners & losers. In this case government decided the winners were their money managing buddies in the tall glass towers and the enemy the usual tax paying serf class

    • leon

      I mean in a sense… They are socializing their losses and keeping their profits.

      • PieInTheSky

        Socializing losses is not socialism. It’s cronyism.

      • leon

        I know.

        How bout this: Government owns the means of production. You just happen the be the means…

      • straffinrun

        Fine. They can swallow what my balls produce.

      • AlexinCT

        Like I tell my ladies: It has 24 essential vitamins and minerals, and as a good Samaritan, I want to help them get their minimum daily requirement…

  24. Tundra

    Good morning, Sloopy!

    It will be interesting to see how badly this bullshit hits the car companies. From my discussions with friends/customers, the bullishness of just a few weeks ago is completely gone. Now, that’s just an emotional response, of course, but cars are often an emotional purchase. We’ll see. I don’t want to bail any of the fuckers out again, though.

    Great song. The story of the album is a good one. Dave played everything with the exception of a little guitar help from Greg Dulli of the Afghan Whigs.

    Hmmm. Haven’t listened to them in ages. Here’s an appropriate one for the news today!

    Have a great day, y’all!

    • RAHeinlein

      S&P and Moody’s cut Ford’s rating to junk territory yesterday.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Ford was headed for junk before this even began.

      • RAHeinlein

        Exactly – multiple CEO’s over the past decade plus, and Bill Ford screeching “we’re behind on driverless technology!”

    • Private Chipperbot

      My lease is ending at the perfect time. I’m going to get a bitching deal on a purchase this time round on top of employee/family discount.

    • creech

      At least one car dealer around here is offering to bring the test drive to your house. I guess they hose it down after you drive around the block a few times and the dealer driver wears a full hazmat suit?

      • Tundra

        The overhead is crushing. They need to do whatever it takes to keep the machine running.

        But yeah, they are doing that here, too. As well as service pickup and delivery.

      • ChipsnSalsa

        I just don’t want Cash for Clunkers rd 2 coming up again.

    • Rhywun

      Dave played everything with the exception of a little guitar help

      I had no idea. Fine album.

    • B.P.

      Afghan Whigs still tour from time to time.

  25. Rebel Scum

    There are relevan details missing here.

    The FBI says a man killed by agents in Belton, Missouri, on Tuesday night was a terrorist suspect who was actively planning to bomb a hospital amid the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. The suspect, 36-year-old Timothy Wilson, was killed by FBI agents while picking up what he believed to be a bomb for use in the attack, the FBI announced in a press release on Wednesday.

    The suspect was motivated “by racial, religious, and anti-government animus” and had been “the subject of a months-long domestic terrorism investigation,” according to the FBI. No other details regarding the suspect’s motive were provided.

    • cyto

      Going to pick up the bomb, huh?

      Anyone wanna take bets on “has an 80 IQ” being a major factor, as well as “FBI agent introduced the idea of a bombing” as parts of the equation that will surface later?

      Also… VBIED? Vehicle Bourne Improvised Explosive Device? Yeah, no. Just go with car bomb. I seriously doubt that he wired a half dozen RPGs together to make an IED and mounted it to a car. You put a bomb in a car…. car bomb. VBIED doesn’t make things any clearer.

      • Viking1865

        To me VBIED means a suicide bomb where someone is driving an explosive laden car toward the target.

        A car bomb is a bomb in a car, designed either to kill the person turning the ignition or kill people around the car, leaving the killer to make his getaway.

    • Pine_Tree

      One day I want to see “investigation” written as “instigation”, so the story will be more accurate.

      Also “…racial, religious, and anti-government animus…” – so, yeah, some idiot that basically nodded along to whatever line the FBI fed him.

  26. cyto

    Netflix dropped a new documentary the other day….. Tiger King.

    I wasn’t interested, but people started recommending it so I watched the first 2 episodes last night.

    Oh, good lord! This thing is right up Glib alley.

    It has a gay polygamist private zoo owner who hires misfit ex-cons who all live in trailers on the property, a playboy polygamous zoo owner who gets teenage interns to live on property and “marries” several of them, an animal rights activist who stalks them all and instigates massive feuds from her own private zoo…..

    And it includes murder for hire, con men who take everything, and rich ex-husbands who are rumored to have been fed to tigers.

    Oh, my lord….

    • PieInTheSky

      Netflix was down last night in Bucharest

    • AlmightyJB

      We watched Ant-Man and the Wasp last night. Very similar plot. It was cute.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        A movie about White Anglo Saxon Protestants?

      • AlmightyJB

        She was a fine representation for sure.

    • Viking1865

      “Maldonado-Passage also has been involved in politics. He was an independent candidate for president in 2016, attained ballot access in Colorado, and received 962 votes (including recorded write-ins) nationwide.[7] In 2018, he ran for governor of Oklahoma as Joe Exotic. He received 664 votes, finishing third out of the three candidates in the Libertarian primary.[8][9][5]”

      ONE OF US ONE OF US

      • cyto

        Oh, you gotta see it. He’s definitely one of us. Does a lot of shooting of household objects. Open carries everywhere. Absolutely as weird an individual as you are ever going to see. Yet would not be the strangest person at the libertarian national convention.

    • Slammer

      We watched episode One, gonna binge the rest now that the governor has issued a “stay at home” order in Idaho. I love stories like that, I love and hate those characters at the same time (especially the big cat rescue lady, she seems the slimiest of them all)

    • Rufus the Monocled

      Sounds like a different version of Trailer Park Boys.

      • cyto

        Oh, it includes a would-be reality show producer who is looking to strike it rich selling these people’s lives to a network. It has literally everything. It is so beyond plausible that it has to be fake. But it isn’t. Every person involved is a larger-than-life caricature.

      • JD is Unemployed

        Yeah I see that, just that in this Bubble’s kitties are actually tigers.

  27. PieInTheSky

    Maybe this was covered but

    A clout-chaser who licked a toilet seat and joked about catching coronavirus has reportedly done just that. The unidentified youngster gained internet notoriety after he filmed himself putting his mouth on the toilet as part of the ‘coronavirus challenge,’ which has seen people licking objects in the face of the global pandemic. The footage was later posted to TikTok That person has since reportedly contracted Covid-19, according to Piers Morgan.

    Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2020/03/25/attention-seeker-licked-toilet-seat-joked-getting-coronavirus-now-coronavirus-12454901/?ito=cbshare

    • leon

      i’ve always said, don’t trust people who eat off of toilet seats.

    • westernsloper

      I saw that video and he would have been fine if he ate a Tide Pod after licking the toilet.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Yes, but did he contract coronavirus from the toilet seat or somewhere else. Also, is he in the hospital for coronavirus, or E. coli or norovirus or something else?

  28. UnCivilServant

    I thought Amazon was prioritizing essential goods? I ordered a box of plastic minis, and they’re going to arrive before my water filter, which I ordered a week ago.

    • Chipwooder

      My wife’s parents ordered books for my son for his birthday and they arrived in fewer than 24 hours.

      • cyto

        Huh… I went to order some computer bits and everything was scheduled for April, so I gave up and payed more for local.

    • Tundra

      Most tap water in this country is fine. Being cooped up in the house all day can be deadly. Those minis are essential.

      • cyto

        What is a plastic mini? Toy figurines?

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m trying to get the metallic taste out of my tap water. I can tolerate a little off, but this is excessive. It may not be a health risk, but the aftertaste is too much.

      • Nephilium

        Build a still and start distilling your own water!

        /one of the few legal uses for owning a still

    • sloopyinca

      They can prioritize delivery all they want. But if the supply chain for them is broken or demand overwhelms it, you’re still gonna wait. And those pickers in the warehouse are gonna still pick whatever else is put on the list since it’s available.

      • UnCivilServant

        I was under the impression that their warehouse inventory system updated availability on the ecommerce pages dynamically. It was in stock when I ordered.

    • AlexinCT

      So you cis genedered vamps like to drink blood from the No’s?

    • cyto

      That took me several beats to understand. And yes… vaguely amusing.

    • AlmightyJB

      No means no.

  29. Rebel Scum

    Biden has fallen out of favor.

    The story begins with Reade being instructed to rush a gym bag to Biden. Upon reaching then-Senator Biden with the bag, Reade claims that he greeted her by name, and proceeded to sexually assault her in a “side area.”

    “We were alone, and it was the strangest thing. There was no, like, exchange really, he just had me up against the wall,” Reade claims.

    “His hands were on me, and underneath my clothes,” Reade later says. “He went down my skirt, but then up inside. He penetrated me with his fingers.”

    Reade alleges that Biden was kissing her and asking her if she “wanted to go somewhere else,” and that after the alleged assault was complete, he said, “C’mon man, I heard you liked me.”

    For some reason picturing him saying that made me chuckle.

    • Drake

      Maybe Corn Pop was spreading false rumors.

    • Don Escaped Texas

      Drag a hundred-dollar bill through a trailer park, you never know what you’ll find

    • leon

      It’ll be interesting to see who treats this woman like a liar and who comes out and says her claim is credible.

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s not far removed from how gropey joe behaves in public, so I’m finding it hard to disbelieve.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I predict she will not be treated with the credence given to Blasey-Ford and will instead be treated more like Bill Clinton’s multiple accusers.

    • cyto

      1993…. still, quite a bit more recent than the Kavanaugh “allegations”, And unlike Kavenaugh, these allegations actually do amount to a sexual assault. And bonus points for a believable stinger quote with “C’mon man, I heard you liked me”. She at least managed to capture his voice.

      • leon

        More beliveable would have been:

        “Huh? wait…. Your not my wife.”

    • AlmightyJB

      Interesting this comes out at the same time the MSM stories about replacing Biden with Cuomo are coming out. Bernie’s Bros would love that.

      • juris imprudent

        The cult of personality around Bernie is beyond staggering.

      • AlmightyJB

        People love the idea of stealing from the rich and giving to themselves. They don’t realize the limitations and consequences of that because they’ve been brainwashed.

      • cyto

        They are slobbering over Cuomo. If you are on team D, speaking angrily into a microphone = leadership.

        A couple of days ago Trump started talking about the cost to society of this strategy being too high and moving toward protecting seniors instead. The media excoriated him for that.

        Within 24 hours, Cuomo has a press conference standing next to a slide saying “a better way”. He details his plan to do it differently than the stupid Trump way. And then proceeds to describe exactly what Trump just said. Smash cut to the same media fawning over his genius.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It was a long time ago and there’s no proof. Biden’s an entitled asshole and maybe he did do this but this is a simple he said she said.

      • Jarflax

        ^This, people need to stop reacting to these stories based on Team affiliation. If you report your sexual assault decades later when the ‘perpetrator’ is running for, or nominated for a high office, you lack credibility.

      • leon

        Rape apologist, I’ll have you know that reporting decades later when the person is running for or nominated for high office is not only the most credible, its the most bravest thing a womyn can do.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        Do I misread the details, or do Cosby and Weinstein exhibit the new rule that crowd-sourced accusations equals proof equals don’t pass Go, don’t collect $200 ?

    • Slammer

      C’mon man, I heard you liked me is a fantastic campaign slogan

  30. Certified Public Asshat

    My friend has been under lock down for too long, he just said he trusts the government more then corporations. He’s probably always felt this way, but seems like a really weird time to make that claim.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      More than*, before Ted gets me.

      • Tundra

        ‘get’s’ me

  31. AlmightyJB

    “The Senate has officially lost its mind.”

    The whole damn country has lost its mind.

    • cyto

      Amen, brother.

      Unanimous vote on that stinking turd of a bill. A bill that just sprays a couple trillion dollars around without any real thought. Hmmm.. I wonder if those two concepts are related?

      • Gender Traitor

        Was Rand not able to vote remotely while in quarantine, or was someone holding a gun to his head?

      • UnCivilServant

        I think you’re supposed to be in the chamber to vote.

      • Drake

        Couldn’t they put him in a bubble or space suit to represent us?

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        96-0. Who else missing besides Rand?

      • leon

        Lee, and Romeny were both in self quarantine.

        Damn Romney tested negative.

      • Drake

        Has Sanders shown up lately?

      • AlexinCT

        EVIL MILLIONAIRES AND BILLIONAIRES!

  32. Certified Public Asshat

    I also made a trip to Lowe’s and Home Depot this morning so I can work on fixing up our playroom/gameroom over the weekend. With none of it being essential, I’m giving myself 1 libertarian point.

    • Festus

      *Frank Booth voice* Fuck that shit! Essential is what you decide right now!

    • Drake

      I was there last weekend to get some essential soil to plant my essential trees and essential grass.

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      Trying to finish off a couple of minor tiling jobs in the new place. Backsplashes in the two bathrooms repaired after the flood. Ugh.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      I repainted the kitchen. It started out by adding a couple magnetic strips for knives and baskets for spices (posted by a Glib). Then I looked at the floral wallpaper from the 50s and thought something has to be done. Then I ended up replacing the dishwasher, which is coming today.

      Repainting the cabinets, drawers, and all the trim was more work than I signed on for. I’m in too deep now though and as my wife helpfully points out, it was 100% my idea. At least it’s almost done.

      • Sean

        You are way too industrious.

  33. Festus

    Yellow Peril update – most of our homeless seem to have gone home. Streets are basically empty of vagrants. Went home to the Rez where they belong, apparently.

      • juris imprudent

        pre-emptively narrowed gaze in case Swiss is slow

      • Swiss Servator

        *narrows gaze*

        /just back from MS Teams meeting

      • juris imprudent

        You are welcome and you have my sympathies. That was just announced as coming our way.

      • Private Chipperbot

        I like it better than Skype. Pro tip: You can turn off incoming video with a click so you don’t melt your bandwidth.

    • Drake

      Home to the Lord?

      (As an Irish priest I knows says about the departed)

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      That’s a bunch of fookin’ bullshite. What oh what has become of the Scots?

      • Chipwooder

        All the sensible Scots came here a long time ago.

    • leon

      Well of course. Your duty is to die and let the cops recover your body.

    • straffinrun

      That’s a pretty thin article. Par for the course at BBC. Makes you wonder what the circs were that:

      “However, the jury was satisfied that you went beyond what was necessary.”

      • Tundra

        17 stab wounds. I guess they looked at it like a mag dump, reload and another mag dump.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        People who get stabbed don’t just fall down.

      • JD is Unemployed

        With the pissant little “knives” that most “roadboys” and gangbangers carry around, you’d probably need at least 17 jabs just to slow the guy down a bit.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That is a lot of stabbing but he might have been active until the point the bleeding out got to him. Who knows though, maybe there were gouges in the floor underneath the body or copious wounds in the guy’s back or something.

      • sloopyinca

        Of course he stabbed him 17 times. He probably stabbed until the guy stopped moving and then stabbed a few more times. Doesn’t mean it was premeditated or excessive. It just means the guy did what pretty much anybody does when faced with what they perceive as a life and death situation.

        It’s like whenever I listen to old crime dramas on the radio. “How many shots did you fire.” “A couple, officer.” “You emptied the magazine.” “Wow, I guess I did. Didn’t even realize it.”

      • leon

        I mean, for some guns a couple and emptying the magazine are the same.

      • Tundra

        Hey, if I’m on the jury the dude walks. But we’re talking about UK equivalents. Like gallons/liters.

      • AlexinCT

        Yep. Never trust people that think something called a “Spotted Dick” is a dessert…

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Hey, SD is good. Sponge cake with raisins in custard.

      • AlexinCT

        I can eat what you describe. When you ask me if I want some spotted dick however, I will tell you that I will pass. I am after all, a lesbian trapped in a man’s body.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Spotted dick with a side of custard.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yeah, I need more details. If the burglar was immobilized and he came over and slit his throat, it ain’t self-defense.

      • JD is Unemployed

        That’s how they say hello in Glasgow.

      • juris imprudent

        +1 Glasgow kiss

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I would push back on that. You don’t know if the guy has another gun somewhere on his person and if he’s faking being immobilized. The onus isn’t on me to put myself at further risk determining that, the onus on me is to immediately end risk to myself or my family.

    • JD is Unemployed

      I almost expected a twist and it turns out the other guy was trying to claim back that which had been unlawfully taken what was rightfully his, or something. Anyhow, in the UK you get years in prison for even looking at a burglar the wrong way. Juries want to feel “safe” from people who would be assertive enough to dare protect their own property and person, and judges and prosecutors go all out to make an example out of anyone who dares.

      Looking at the sidebar stories on that I’m dismayed by the garbage identity mewling and virtue-signaling crap. Sweet meteor of Death 2020.

      • Naptown Bill

        Whenever I get depressed about the state of the US I look at the UK and…well, get even more depressed. It seems like there’s something beyond garbage politicians happening there. Culturally the British seem like a defeated people, if that makes sense. I’m sure a lot of that is just the media, but still.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Terminal politeness?

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Christ, no. There are few places on Earth I’ve been where complete strangers were more likely to be rude and/or straight-out confrontational towards me than the UK. There’s some seriously messed-up folks on that island, lemme tell ya.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Inhibition, then. In the posher / suburban Archie Leach types.

        I hear they’re being asked to shout in unison in support of the NHS at 8:00. ?

      • JD is Unemployed

        Yup. I can attest to this having been physically assaulted by angry commuters who only attack from behind then run away. It’s a fucking horrendous state of affairs. It’s fucking miserable. NHS just charged me double for prescription meds. Sometimes they fudge it so it goes as two separate prescriptions. They shouldn’t, but when they do there’s never any way to complain or get them to fix it. Once it’s issued it’s issued. They won’t do another one, and of course I’ve no alternative to buy on the open market, which would be magnitudes more expensive anyway given the artificially inflated price of even generic pharmaceuticals via the cronyism that keeps the money rolling in. So, the double charge is still subsidized by the taxpayer. Oh well I seem to have got on to a general rant about good old cynical, defeated Britain.

      • Toxteth O’Grady

        Can’t one get anything for a price on Harley Street?

      • JD is Unemployed

        Well I’m coming back to saty that the dispensary at the surgery actually called me to apologise and offerd me either a refund or to put the charge forward to the repeat next month. My cold, qualsi-Randian heart melted slightly and I felt bad for being cantankerous and thanked them for putting it right. Oh well. I should try to maintain some perspective and some positivity.

      • JD is Unemployed

        Can’t one get anything for a price on Harley Street?

        If one is covered or is minted out the wazoo. I think a lot of Harley St stuff is referred through other private practice when certain specialist something or other is required.

        Fun fact: CBP told me I was carrying too much meds for my intended stay in America, so I said, just take the extra and leave me with what I need for the time I’m here. The only reason I took more than that with me was incase of emergencies such as flights being cancelled. The airline I flew in on went out of business the next day. I’ve got some private cover when the NHS can’t see me/treat me within a certain time frame, but I’m not entirely sure what the specifics of it are.

      • Chipwooder

        Something Glenn Reynolds mentions from time to time applies is the notion of cultural confidence. The US of the 19th and the first half of the 20th centuries was able to successfully assimilate enormous numbers of immigrants because it was a strong, confident culture and society. It welcomed many people from around the globe with the expectation that they would adapt to America. The USA of the 21st century is anything but a strong, confident society, and the UK is even worse in that respect.

        The dark side of history shouldn’t be ignored, but that pendulum has swung so far in the other direction that the elites on both sides of the Atlantic work tirelessly to instill in the citizenry a deep self-loathing.

      • JD is Unemployed

        Smart man 🙁

      • JD is Unemployed

        We are, as evidenced by any potential notion of anything positive and cooperative outside of that which is decreed by the establishment being cut down brutally with cynicism. I just don’t get it.

    • AlexinCT

      Can’t risk the serfs thinking they have any right to protect their property or selves, cause when we want to go in and fuck them over, they should be compliant and immidiately grab their ankles…

      /Da Man.

    • Naptown Bill

      A strong showing with lots of potential girlfriends, but I fell in love with #5.

    • juris imprudent

      55 would put a gun to my head, well two actually.

    • juris imprudent

      Should be unless the bottle has been standing upright for a length of time.

  34. Pine_Tree

    My observation from yesterday – no cops out on the roads.

    My oldest got sent home from college a coupla weeks back. Yesterday was his assigned time for “come and totally empty your dorm room and turn in your key”. It was actually well-organized and scheduled so that nobody on the same floor was doing it simultaneously. Anyway, the drive meant heading up the interstate towards Atlanta, and then around it on I-285 and past a little ways. Traffic level was probably comparable to a normal day – maybe a little light.

    But there were 0 cops anywhere. Normally in GA they’re everywhere, out revenuing. But in our little town and on the interstates, there wasn’t a single one.

    • UnCivilServant

      “I ain’t getting no coronavirus to write a measly $500 ticket”

      • straffinrun

        Get home safely.

    • robc

      Kennesaw St?

      • Pine_Tree

        aye

      • robc

        Fun fact: I have never been to the top of Kennesaw Mtn while the park was open.

        Only after hours, usually around midnight.

    • SDF-7

      If there aren’t any in Arcade along 129, that’s when you know it is serious…

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Better than Baldwin on SNL

    • Raven Nation

      In the replies:

      “My Dad is 80. He is also a Navy Vet (one of the first 5 black officers on the USS Midway), a KC BBQ pit master, baseball ace, jazz expert,renaissance man, &33 year career Foreign Service Officer & U.S. Ambassador.

      I would let the Dow BURN before sacrificing a day of his life.”

      • Chipwooder

        To which I would reply by asking what he thinks an economic depression would do for Dad’s long term survival chances.

      • RAHeinlein

        The pensioners won’t be missing any meals, and benefits won’t be reduced by a dime.

      • Chipwooder

        I wouldn’t be so sure about that. There would be haircuts galore.

      • kbolino

        If Social Security so much as didn’t get a yearly increase, I’d be amazed. Even when it was supposed to stay flat (never mind decrease) when the economy collapsed in 2008, Congress still found the time and votes to ensure that the rest of us subsidized unjustified SS benefit increases.

      • Tundra

        So how long will pops last post-collapse, genius?

      • ruodberht

        Because the economy is the DJIA, not people trying to fucking work who can’t because these assholes shut down the country.

      • kbolino

        Ironically, the DJIA is far more important to retirees than working schlubs. Pensions and retirement accounts are mostly held in stocks, after all.

      • Tres Cool

        Tres Sr., who is also an 80 year old Navy vet, has a more pragmatic view: “everyone has to die of something”.

        Its great to hear him when the docs tell him to quit smoking (he’s 1.5 pack/day): “why the hell would I quit smoking now? Im 80.”

  35. Mojeaux

    I am awake!

    Look, if they’re giving out money, I’mma take it. Color me utilitarian.

    • Naptown Bill

      “It’s your money! You paid for it!”

    • Chipwooder

      I plan on using my money to buy one of the guns I’ve been wanting. I figure that’s subversive enough to assuage my conscience.

      • UnCivilServant

        My low end of $775 would cover a wide variety of firearm choices.

        Maybe I’ll finally get a lever gun.

      • Chipwooder

        I’ve kicked around the thought of the Henry Big Boy in .44 Magnum. The octagonal barrel is delightfully old-timey.

      • Sean

        I need another AR.

      • Naptown Bill

        80% Arms is running an email ad about prepping that annoyed the absolute shit out of me because of the rampant fear-mongering. Still, I am thinking about picking up a couple of lowers to work on during coronacation.

        Also, I think we should do a weekly feature: What I’m Doing During My Coronacation. It could be like the “What We’re Reading” feature.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m on a teleconference, because two of our main applications shat the bed overnight.

      • Mojeaux

        Rent–when we finally have to start paying some.

        My business is picking up because people now have time to do what they’ve “been meaning to do for a while now.”

        Mr. Mojeaux also has a coronacation, paid.

        XX is working almost full time.

        I have a feeling this thing is going to put off our foreclosure fir a long, long while. *fingers crossed*

        I just have very little pride left.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        hang in there

        Doing your best is all you owe yourself . . . or anyone. I don’t want to get into the semantics of “pride,” but, between living in the present and focusing on principles, you do good and can stay productive every day.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Ironically my payout will pay for the money I owe the IRS right now.

  36. straffinrun

    Day deux of WFH and I don’t see this taking off here. I actually get along with my wife and she’s about ready to kill me.

    • Tejicano

      I don’t see WFH going anywhere in the Japanese work environment.

      The usual comment about people taking more than a couple days off in a row is that they might get back and find their desk is gone or somebody else has it now.

      When I read that the Chinese divorce rate spiked after the enforced stay-at-home period in Wuhan I could see a similar thing happening in Japan if they tried that.

      Japanese would rather risk getting Wuhan flu than losing their job.

  37. Shirley Knott

    I ventured out to the nearest Kroger this morning. They were somewhat busier than i expected, but not crowded. Decent stock on most items, even had the Black Rice i prefer. Packaged meats were pretty thoroughly picked over — about 10% of normal stock levels. Frozen foods were a crap shoot — plenty of frozen burgers, in a range of lean/fat ratios. Frozen dinners were scarce. But they had toilet paper. Only a few brands, but they had some. Likewise other paper products.
    Gas was $1.79; with last month’s fuel points, I paid $1.19.

    • straffinrun

      What is that in liter/Yen?

      • UnCivilServant

        Please resubmit data inquiry in real units.

      • AlexinCT

        BA-ZINGA!

      • straffinrun

        No Zimbabwe units either.

      • AlexinCT

        Considering how high those numbers go, most people except for Rain Man, need calculators to make the conversions.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        0.029, approximately. Mid-market rates, of course. YMMV.  ;-)

    • Naptown Bill

      What was your bean status? Around here if you wanna make a nice black bean soup your pretty much out of luck. And God forbid you want lentils. I’m fine, because I’ll eat anything slower than me, but the wife and daughter are much pickier and have been learning the hard way that the true omnivores are the ones who will survive the Coronapocalypse.

      • Shirley Knott

        Pretty much zilch. I can no longer eat beans so I didn’t pay a lot of attention, but yes, beans and rice are still rare. I’ve got pounds of whiye and brown rice, but its hard to stock up that much of the black. A pity, as I’ve grown extremely fond of it.

    • Tundra

      Uh, like the flu?

      • Private Chipperbot

        IT’S NOT THE FLU YOU DENIER!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      So where’s the reservoir for the virus? Where does it hide in between outbreaks?

      • straffinrun

        A wet market in Wuhan. Might not be the exact same strain, though.

      • Agent Cooper

        Have they tried burning it to the ground?

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        I was thinking the ChiComms will just re-release it from their bioweapons lab at the beginning of every Chinese Lunar New Year, just to mark such an auspicious annual occasion.

    • AlexinCT

      How about we stop pretending China is anything but a menace when it comes to being a team player, and roll back a large portion of the globalist agenda that has managed to hand the asshats in the CCP all the power they now have and the ability to do shit like this?

    • Agent Cooper

      So we’ll have immunity to it and it will degrade to a weaker strain?

    • Don Escaped Texas

      smells of central planning

      I don’t object to all of it

      how exactly does bringing manufacturing back to OH move the needle in a pandemic ?

      • Private Chipperbot

        More union workers refusing to work and still get paid?

      • Don Escaped Texas

        True story: lots of the machinery I’ve built ends up in Mexico; suddenly, one was moved from DFW to Dayton.

        DFW was shutting down (fine), so the last line needed to go somewhere. Plant in MEX was cheap, but nothing is cheaper than free; the guys in DAY were in a dead plant and being paid per contract by the hour to sit around and read the paper anyway, so, guess what they’re doing now.

    • AlmightyJB

      “We Need to Get Our Fiscal House in Order”

      I’ll be cracking up laughing all day at that one!

  38. Agent Cooper

    Saw this posted on Facebook:

    I have to ask, have any of your parents or grandparents expressed a willingness to die for our economy? Inn all seriousness, is this a thought that is gaining traction?

    They’ll die anyway in a long major depression.

    • Private Chipperbot

      My mom did. She’s a retired nurse in FL and is going to pick up hours in a hospital.

    • Agent Cooper

      All of the responses were HELL NO!

      None of these people have ever had to pay an employee in their lives.

    • Rebel Scum

      False dichotomy is false.

    • leon

      I can do this too? Have any of you asked your neighbors? Have any of them expressed a willingness to starve to death for my grandma? Inn all seriousness is this a thought that is gaining traction?

  39. blackjack

    Man, I’m sick of living like Howard Hughes. Guy was a visionary, but this is ridiculous.

    • Agent Cooper

      Have you started peeing in jars?

      • straffinrun

        Was I not supposed to do that? Should I have taken out the marmalade first?

      • AlexinCT

        I now am starting to see why your wife wants to kick your arse straff….

    • UnCivilServant

      you don’t need to wear tissue boxes for shoes.

  40. ChipsnSalsa

    Wife is calling state rep to express displeasure with the Governors handling of the Covid craziness what’s a good statement to make?

    • AlmightyJB

      Take action or lose my vote.

      • ChipsnSalsa

        I’ve seen a lot of “action” from law makers lately.

      • AlexinCT

        Their action amounts to the same effect/result for people that you get when you see the way the bull (state reps) services the cows (you serfs)….

      • AlmightyJB

        By action, I mean impeach the Governer.

    • bacon-magic

      Taxation is theft.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      OK, here is what I told her.

      “The governor’s actions are detrimental (in many ways) to the state and will be ineffectual at containing the virus. Any action that can be taken should be to repeal his executive order regarding the corona virus outbreak.”

  41. JD is Unemployed

    Couriers seem to be in limbo here. One delivery I sent out took a day extra after encountering an “emergency situation” on the first attempt. Other couriers seem to be impossible to reach. It took so long to get through to a customer service rep that I had forgotten I was waiting to be connected and missed the chat. It took so long to get a straight answer out of one business I am expecting a delivery from (lots of evasive language and condescending deflection about the lung pao sicken apocalypse) that I think my persistence meant they eventually flat out lied about the item even being picked up – courier tracking data says it hasn’t been (after four days) – problem is I can’t reach the courier to confirm either way. Oh well. Fuck this shitty panic and fuck the totalitarian nightmare that all the sheepy progs are cheering on and yet saying isn’t enough. We need more doing of the things and controlling of every minute aspect of people’s lives until noone can do anything.

    Update – I did finally get in touch with a rep but they told me nothing helpful and then cut me off straight away with the chat disappearing. I haven’t been sent a transcript, or a survey form so I can tank their ass for just dismissing me. Anyway it turns out the sender is lying to me, according to them. Garbage people.

    • UnCivilServant

      Because most so-called “experts” are anything but, and simply push a policital agenda?

    • Naptown Bill

      They oppose experts only when viewed in juxtaposition with the Progressive cult of the technocrat, I’d posit.

    • leon

      My gut would be that denigration of experts is kind of a populist thing to do. Your point is that the experts have failed and the people know who to put in charge.

      • Chipwooder

        a)There are many “experts” whose expertise is dubious
        b)While expert advice is often quite valuable, too often people don’t recognize the limits of expertise in many fields. It’s stupid to be ignorant, but it’s also stupid to put blind faith in anyone’s expertise.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Experts also frequently disagree with one another, said disagreements almost always being ignored by the legacy media who are too busy trying to stoke a particular narrative.

    • AlexinCT

      Why do rightwing populist leaders oppose experts?

      I don’t know. Maybe it is the abysmally bad track record of these so called experts? Being a bunch of credentialed douchebags that simply refuse to be held accountable for some of the most destructive and damaging decisions/actions and demand to get an even greater lion’s share of the power and loot, while the rest of us get fucked seems to not be a good way to piss off people that think results should matter.

    • RAHeinlein

      Expertise in a specific field is just that – specific. Application of that specific expertise in a greater context – only an “expert” who is egomaniac, blowhard, or Dr. Fauci would suggest they should determine those policies.

      Related, the left simply asks so-called experts to willingly prostitute knowledge to further the favored political agenda, so no legitimate expertise/professionalism.

      • Chipwooder

        One need look no further than the supposed science of trasngenderism to see ample evidence of your point. When supposed experts tell me that a man need only to declare that he is a woman and take some hormones to make him identical in every way to a biological woman, that is a clear indicator that many “experts” are completely full of shit.

      • AlexinCT

        One need look no further than the supposed science of trasngenderism to see ample evidence of your point.

        ^^^THIS^^^

        There are way too many “experts” prattling about blatantly stupid shit and telling us that it is the rest of us refusing to give up on other sciences like biology, chemistry, physics, math, and in particular, or the use of using logic, that are the problem. When anyone can claim moral authority by the simple virtue of pretending to be an expert, coupled with the horrible track record of our leadership expertise class I mentioned above, the appeal to expertise simply loses its mojo.

      • Don Escaped Texas

        too many

        meh: media wars; one crazy bitch in Keller doesn’t outweigh 10k normies across the land; this is the twitterfication of demographics

    • AlmightyJB

      Knowledge is not the same thing as wisdom. Credentials don’t automatically confer expertise, especially when dealing with situations where there is zero experience.

    • Fatty Bolger

      I’m quite sure that you can find experts with contrary opinions on just about any subject.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I disagree.

      • Jarflax

        You are wrong.

    • invisible finger

      I’m an expert on the software I wrote.

      I’d be willing to guess 90% of the end users don’t listen to me when they ask what’s going on and do what they want to do anyway. And then come to me begging me to drop everything and fix the problem they created by ignoring what I told them to do in the first place.

      I don’t think any of them ignored me because of their political ideology.

      • PieInTheSky

        I’m an expert on the software I wrote. – a code review will be the judge of that

    • kbolino

      Because the “neoliberals” lost the plot. The “experts” were not so very expert anymore. One need just look at Merkel’s plan to bring a million or more “refugees” into Europe, which had up until that point very restrictive immigration policies, to see the general issue of declining expertise. I’d be willing to bet very few people in Merkel’s inner circle thought it was a bad idea, and fewer still would voice any objection to it. It was also “expert” advice that largely led to the 2008 economic downturn and it’s “experts” who are predicting that it’s possible to get off fossil fuels in the next 20 years.

      The problem with expertise is that it’s been skinsuited.

      • kbolino

        For another illustration, suppose there are two scientists. One is saying that the temperature will rise moderately but not catastrophically over the next century, to the best of our understanding and ability to predict, while the other says everybody’s going die and the earth is going to “literally burn”.

        The former is an expert. The latter is not. Yet, to many people, the latter is more credible and the former is either a “denier” or nearly so.

    • Hyperion

      The Guardian is left wing trash, of course.

  42. Chipwooder

    Tom Elliott spittin’ fire:

    Tom Elliott
    @tomselliott
    · Mar 23
    Flashback: @RonaldKlain, Biden’s “Coronavirus” adviser who’s hitting Trump FOR “downplaying” the threat, himself downplayed it a month ago on @PodSaveAmerica

    “No reason to yet to be fearful, no reason really panic or anything like that”

    • juris imprudent

      It’s DIFFERENT when WE do it!!!

      • kbolino

        All of these people criticizing Trump over the virus seem to be saying “it’s your fault I wasn’t prepared”.

  43. Agent Cooper

    Positive test rates in Ohio are at 5%. Obviously, New York is around 30%.

    • AlmightyJB

      The more cases you have, they more money you’re going to eventually get from the feds.

    • juris imprudent

      PA is testing about 10 to 1 negative. Either they can’t figure out who to test, or this isn’t near as contagious as was originally feared.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        If that’s a truly random sample of the GenPop, that’s actually good news.

      • leon

        UT is at a 5% test positive rate. Is that good or bad? My county had a 33% increase in cases overnight.

      • leon

        Well 33% looking back. So really it was a 50% increase…

        Don’t mock me bro.

      • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

        Again, if a truly random sample, I would think that’s good news.
        I have no idea if they’re even trying to randomize their sampling, though . . .

      • Don Escaped Texas

        that’s been the reported rate pretty much all over the US all along

        my guess: it says more about how many people run around screaming about the need to be tested than any symptom ratios; it’s just a proxy for typical American stupidity

      • Don Escaped Texas

        it’s also about the ration I’ve experienced since this began between HR update emails to actual useful work emails

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Florida is just under 10%.

  44. Festus

    Bailing. It’s daytime but the snow is falling heavily. Gonna be a shite night for poor old Festus. Every time it snows it adds at least an hour a day to my grind and it takes me at least a week to catch back up. I’m literally getting too old for this shit.

    • AlmightyJB

      Good luck!

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      Have a good sleep, mang.

  45. Sensei

    Well that just sucks…

    New Jersey man, 25, in coma after misplaced positive coronavirus test

    It’s interesting that in addition to unhealthy smokers and the like we are also getting young and fit people. Part of the reason the Spanish flu was terrible is that it took out young people because of their strong immune system (over)reaction to the virus.

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      -1 Cytokine Storm.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Cytokine storm and lung inflammation most likely

    • Juvenile Bluster

      When there’s an 0.1-0.2% death rate for an age group, that’s still a good number of people.

      Interestingly, I read a few years back about how some modern immunologists don’t think that the death rate from the Spanish Flu was entirely due to cytokine storm but due to the conditions of the time. Via wiki:

      Scientists offer several possible explanations for the high mortality rate of the 1918 influenza pandemic. Some analyses have shown the virus to be particularly deadly because it triggers a cytokine storm, which ravages the stronger immune system of young adults.[11] In contrast, a 2007 analysis of medical journals from the period of the pandemic[12][13] found that the viral infection was no more aggressive than previous influenza strains. Instead, malnourishment, overcrowded medical camps and hospitals, and poor hygiene promoted bacterial superinfection. This superinfection killed most of the victims, typically after a somewhat prolonged death bed.[14][15]

      Of course, not having proper hospital space might up the death rate from COVID-19 for similar reasons.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        I’m quite sure that you can find experts with contrary opinions on just about any subject.

  46. Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

    Canada’s in 15th place worldwide for # of confirmed cases. Poor northern Italy’s getting the sh!t kicked out of it.
    I’d love to know how many “confirmed” cases are also hospitalized, but I don’t think anyone’s giving (or even compiling) that info.

    • Don Escaped Texas

      The implied figure here is everyone is in hospital.

      Total – Active cases seems to be pretty much zero: we’re in the loading part of the curve, far from stasis. Like I was saying the other say: the data have not fully bloomed yet.

      • Drake

        I notice they don’t always give the age of the deceased – but rarely is it an otherwise healthy person under 60. Also seems to be way more men than women checking out.

    • Don Escaped Texas

      your main point was maybe quarantined instead of hospitalized

      which I sloppily neglect since I think most folk who test positive only went in because of serious symptoms; it would be cool to see a “recovered at home just fine, thank you” column

  47. leon

    Paul Simon was a Clairvoyant.

    In Me and Julio Simon sings about saying “Goodby to Rosie, the Queen of Corona”. what he was talking about was a person who had escaped quarantine, which was caught by his elderly mother, oh what she saw, was “Against the law” .

  48. AlmightyJB

    I can’t find a consolidated list of Ohio CV deaths by age because the media wants everyone freaking out, but from what I could piece together. It appears that out of 10 deaths, all but 2 were in their 80s and 90s. One was 76 and one was 58. I’m not 100% on that but it’s pretty damn close. Four of the ten appear to have come from the same nursing home in Miami County. So if we lock down the nursing homes, that would seem sufficient to me.

  49. Sensei

    Once again I can’t but reluctantly like Trump.

    On Wednesday, Pompeo again criticized the Chinese government when asked if his insistence on the label was the reason for the holdup.

    “We’ve wanted to work with the Chinese Communist Party throughout this crisis — this crisis that began in Wuhan, China,” Pompeo told reporters. “We tried, you’ll remember, from the opening days to get our scientists, our experts on the ground there so that we could begin to assist in the global response to what began there in China, but we weren’t able to do that. The Chinese Communist Party wouldn’t permit that to happen.”

    China: Pompeo has ‘sinister motive’ for pushing ‘Wuhan virus’ language

    The fate of the world is resting on the issue that G7 can’t agree on language on a joint statement.

  50. The Late P Brooks

    I’m quite sure that you can find experts with contrary opinions on just about any subject.

    That may be so, but they’re only LEGITIMATE experts if they agree with me and confirm my biases.

    I learned that from CNN.

    • JD is Unemployed

      The Guardian follows much the same system.

  51. R C Dean

    Re: allocating scarce hospital resources:

    I plan to ask three questions:

    (1) Are we really willing to keep ventilators in reserve when a low-“value” patient needs one?

    (2) Are we really willing to take a low-priority patient off a ventilator (which is a death sentence) and watch them die when a high-“value” patient needs one?

    (3) Who will decide who is high-“value” and who is low-“value”? Who is going to tell a landscaper’s family that we are taking him off the vent and giving it to a lawyer, who is, after all, regarded as “essential” per the many governor edicts identifying who is essential and who is not?

    In my view, the only moral approach is classic triage:

    Tier 1 – you’re going to die anyway, no ventilator/ICU for you.

    Tier 2 – we have a good chance of saving you if we pull out all the stops – you get a ventilator/ICU.

    Tier 3 – you’ll be fine. Get outta here.

    Within category 2, its first-come, first-serve. This is the only way to recognize that every human being has equal inherent worth.

    More narrowly, even triage has serious legal risks. Overlaying “instrumental value to society” would be virtually impossible to defend to a jury, who will, after all, be made up mainly of people who would be classified as “low-value”. As a plaintiff’s lawyer, I would feast on it and cash a large check for punitive damages.

    • leon

      Thank you again.

      Medical Ethicis seems to be wholly taken over by people who are evil.

      • R C Dean

        There’s a rant/article in me about “bio-ethics”, which is almost entirely vulgar utilitarianism deployed as an apologia for Top. Men. making life or death decisions without regard to what people actually want/consent to. It also runs under the moniker “public health”.

        For the real-world example of a public health system (not to be confused with a healthcare system) run by bio-ethicists, look to the NHS.

      • Ozymandias

        I repeat here what I wrote: put “public” in front of “health” and it’s the same as public in front of everything else: “education,” “servant,” and “bathrooms” should give you just about the right flavor of what “public” does to everything it touches.

      • Pine_Tree

        I always say that the word “social” works like a Boolean NOT, making the next word mean the opposite of whatever it actually means. I suppose it sorta works for “public” too.

      • leon

        + Social Democracy

      • ruodberht

        Alienans predicate.

    • Sensei

      Godspeed!

    • Tundra

      Good luck. The Death Cultist s have a significant head start.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      How would you verify all these cases? Would you need a committee formed to investigate all these cases? What if one of the high value persons has been found to have made an improper pass at someone sexually decade + ago, does that reduce their value?

      Wouldn’t it be much easier if the government kept a database of each person’s job and status / value to the country that this sort of situation could be evaluated w/o prejudice? Some sort of social score card perhaps.

    • Jarflax

      The only fair answer is if you don’t have enough ventilators for everyone, the teacher confiscates all the ventilators and locks them in her desk.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    the Progressive cult of the technocrat

    *tips hat to Naptown Bill*

    Exactly this. I started using the term “expert-ism” in college, because of my liberal professors’ incessant preaching that we should allow ourselves to be guided and ruled by only those “qualified” to tell us how to live. Only if you surrender yourself unto the merciful guidance of the Mandarinate will you be truly free and happy.

    Fuck off, slavers.

    • leon

      Thats another good point. often “Opposition to Experts” is used when what is really happening is “Opposition to people telling you how you have to live your life”.

      • Naptown Bill

        And it’s also rolled out when people are skeptical of particular experts. Expertise is in some measure defined by adherence to the accepted dogma. Climate is a great example of this. Economics, too.

      • Akira

        Ditto with “anti-science”. It’s almost always used against:
        1) People who disagree with what politicians claim the scientists are saying
        2) People who dispute that the scientists have the authority to dictate how they must live

        The people who toss around the “anti-science” actually demonstrate a dismal understanding of science. They don’t view science as a mode of thought; they view it as a group of human beings who create truth by speaking it. They don’t think you’re allowed to ask questions once scientists have spoken on something even if there’s a rational basis for questioning the findings. They understand nothing about limitations of current science (especially in fields where there are many uncontrollable variables).

        “I read in on CNN that scientists said this, so it must be true” is what most “pro-science” people do, and that’s the most unscientific mindset ever.

  53. The Late P Brooks

    Re: allocating scarce hospital resources:

    I plan to ask three questions:

    Are you a credentialed Medical Ethicist? If not, your opinion is irrelevant.

    • R C Dean

      Are you a credentialed Medical Ethicist?

      No, I can still look at myself in the mirror every morning.

  54. LJW

    Can someone correct me if I’m wrong. From the sound of it this government paycheck we are about to get is actually just a tax credit check. So come tax season next year a lot of people are going to be disappointed to find out they owe a lot of money.

    • Sensei

      I read that about one incarnation. No idea in the current form if that remains.

    • leon

      IDK, i’d like to get a good write up on it rather than parse through the bill’s text.

    • UnCivilServant

      Well if the credit applies and their witholdings are close to accurate, it should zero out the effect on the filed return

    • LJW

      Not sure why my phone added check. Just meant tax credit*

  55. juris imprudent

    Noon, and no fresh content? What are you people doing – working?

  56. RAHeinlein

    Our elementary school teachers just had an impromptu car parade through the neighborhood – cars were decorated – people went out and waved. Credit where it is due – nice gesture.

    • MikeS

      But most importantly; did they throw candy?

      Seriously, yeah, a very nice gesture.

    • Chipwooder

      My daughter’s school is having a similar parade through out neighborhood at 2.

  57. The Late P Brooks

    Can someone correct me if I’m wrong. From the sound of it this government paycheck we are about to get is actually just a tax credit check. So come tax season next year a lot of people are going to be disappointed to find out they owe a lot of money.

    Based on a thing I read about Gulag Barbie, it’s just a loan, since she apparently thinks it will be subject to a 100% marginal tax rate next year. For the undeserving rich, anyway.

    Don’t ask me how that’s gonna work.

    • Jarflax

      They mail checks to everyone. If you make more than 75k you owe a portion of the money back as taxes, up to a point somewhere around 150k where you owe it all back.

  58. Mojeaux

    A whole parking lot of empty spaces and she has to park next to me. Very closely. Why?

    • UnCivilServant

      Are you close to an entrance?

      • Mojeaux

        Yes but equidistant on the other side of the aisle.

        Also there are hate birds the birds that hate at the door.

      • UnCivilServant

        You’re clearly a shield against the Geese.

    • ChipsnSalsa

      boggles the mind.

      You think you park far enough out in the lot to not have someone pull up next to you and bam there someone is rolling in right next to you.

      also, maybe they are in the lot for a drug sale.

      • Mojeaux

        At JoAnn Fabric. LOL

        The only drug here is SuperGlue.

      • Private Chipperbot

        I dunno. I’ve walked past my wife while she was using e6000 and don’t understand how she doesn’t fall out of her chair after 5 minutes of working with it.

      • Mojeaux

        E6000 has never worked for me. I use Scotch superglue for almost everything. Fixed my favorite purse yesterday.

      • UnCivilServant

        Superglue has never worked for me, except for sealing up small cuts in skin while they heal.

  59. The Late P Brooks

    The only fair answer is if you don’t have enough ventilators for everyone, the teacher confiscates all the ventilators and locks them in her desk.

    NICE.

    • mrfamous

      Dude’s about to get canceled on Twitter