As is the case when the democrats don’t have control of an institution, it has come in vogue for them to attack the Senate as an awful institution. A recent Vox article advocated separating DC into several states so as to amend the constitution specifically to get rid of the Senate. Clearly this was a contrived example of a non viable plan with the purpose of destroying the Senate. But that, along with a robc’s recent article on a proposal for changing state boundaries made me wonder what would be the political ramifications of various shake ups in state boundaries. So I jumped in and decided to play around with two fantastical, but fun scenarios of a possible American Future.
Every Congressional District Becomes a State:
In this scenario every congressional district would become its own state. This would make things very strange in the House of Representatives, since as it stands right now, each state would only get 1 representative, and there would be no room for more. That doesn’t seem very tenable, as the states with larger population would probably push to have the limit increased. Also, Alaska would remain the largest state, by land area, in the country. Other states that would remain unchanged would be: Delaware, Montana, North Dakota, South Dakota, Vermont, and Wyoming.
The Senate is harder to predict. We know that there would be 870 senate seats, but how those seats would be split is hard to say. In it’s simplest form, we could assume that there are no split delegations, and that whatever party currently holds the house district would have both senate seats. This would lead to a Senate composition that would be (currently) controlled by the Democrats with a 470 to 398 Majority. Our analysts say that Mitt Romney would still be a douche in this situation.
What about making Every County its own State:
What if instead all the states devolved their sovereignty to their counties, and all the counties were became states in the Union. What would occur then? Well according to this list that would leave us with 3141 states. The Senate would then become inflated to 6282 members. As for composition, in this example I decided to set each county that was within 5% in the last election as a split delegation. In that case we end up with a Republican super-majority of 5291 seats to 991. The house of Representatives would however be a mess. Obviously the house would have to have at least 3141 seats, but probably more. Of course this wouldn’t ever happen at all.
Of course there would be plenty of other ramifications. The Electoral College would be shifted in both cases, and most likely more variation within the parties (possibly even multiple local parties having representation in the Federal legislature). What other interesting ways could we split the states?
Geeze… I didn’t realize i had screwed up the formatting.
“What about making Every County its own State:”
If you did this, democrats would be out of power, forever. So you can’t do that.
Instead, we just need one big county for the entire country and it should be called ‘California’.
If we did go through with it though, large chuncks of Alaska would not be in a state as most of Alaska is not even incorporated into Bouroughs.
“Instead, we just need one big county for the entire country and it should be called ‘California’.”
Then we could turn it into a hotel.
That would solve illegal immigration.
heh, cause immigration to other countries would be made illegal?
I don’t think it was you. My understanding is that WordPress pushes out changes which break the website until SP does something web-designy with the Glibs page.
How about making CT, RI, and MA one state? Also, combine Maryland and Delaware.
And buy Greenland.
There’s no people in Delaware. And no one has ever been there. Sort of like most of Canada, just not as cold.
Buy Greenland. Yeah, I like it. I think it’s libertarian compatible, we can all move there. Then we just have to wait for global warming to kick in before we all freeze to death.
Al Gore said 75% chance it’s ice free in 5-7 years…in 2009, so surely 11 years out with rising carbon emission means I don’t even need to pack mittens.
This fucking laptop. Missed a tag closing.
Dude, that’s proven to be what happens with isolated peoples. Just look at the Icelanders. Like I said, no one has ever been to Delaware and their minute population hasn’t been able to breed outside their own isolated clan.
There’s more genetic drift among Smith Islanders. I mean, people talk shit about Alabama and Mississippi and leave Delaware alone?
“leave Delaware alone?”
Well, I mean, no one has ever been there, so they don’t know.
Homo Delawarians. Amirite?
Really, not quite Homo Sapiens, Delawarians, a Homo genus curiosity, or something else?
Southern Delaware is more like the South than Philly.
Southern Maryland, think Berlin, is WAY more like the south than anywhere near Baltimore or Annapolis.
But all of Maryland is south of the Mason/Dixen line. Not sure about Delaware, no one has even been there to map it.
I’ve been to Delaware.
It’s…. a mix of Philly and the South.
Did you spot any Homo Delawarians? You could be a famous Paleo Anthropologist, you know.
Yes.
I also used to work with a guy from Delaware. The Philly end of Delaware.
He was a Bernie supporter and more trouble than he was worth. We were happy to see him go.
Quelle surprise.
Quelle surprise.
The funny thing is, a couple folks thought I didn’t like him because he was a Bernie supporter. I told them I disliked him long before I found out he was a Bernie supporter, then pointed the incompetent things he had done since the day he was hired.
Those folks got a blank look on their face and changed the subject.
Yeah, I’d say make the whole DELMARVA peninsula part of Delaware.
Wait, where would Kent Island fit into this scheme?
Poppy – Don’t Go Outside
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeRuFdgrwuY
Guitar sounds a bit Brian May to me.
Our Poppy is all grown up.
Same 50 states, divided by equal population.
Lots of countries strive for something like this. For example, Germany’s states are largely ahistorical blobs that don’t vary too greatly in population or area (with some exceptions like the city-states). England is constantly rejiggering its counties, unitary authorities, etc. etc. for political reasons.
Greater Appalachia.
I love stuff like this.
I completely support the 50k who want to take over UpperNotNewYorkia or wherever. I ain’t moving up there, but I get it.
Mississippi should include west TN and west KY (true west KY: west of the river).
I’d love the right to move to a county state based on political structure, but most of the badass shitlords around here are actually clamped onto some government program and wouldn’t last a day with the USDA, DoD, etc. I might could find some farmers or hillbillies who truly want to be left alone, but I still believe most Americans want to control each other, and I submit that the past month has not helped my critics’ case in this regard.
Yes, split the NY islands from the rest of the state.
stop, my pp can only get so hard.
truth be told, that wouldn’t really solve our issues, most of the state outside NYC still loves authoritarianism. But it would be somewhat less shitty.
These ideas are silly fantasy – fanciful pleas for an “easy” solution to a difficult problem.
I always find these ideas funny. Libertarians are supposed to understand the idea of unseen consequences yet they get excited about constitutional conventions and redrawing maps. What makes the people that can’t even nominate a libertarian to represent the libertarian party think that when you start down this road nothing horrible will result?
Oh i have no illusions that this could work. But a man can dream though… A man can dream.
“Change for the sake of change,” eh Kitteh?
Hey it gets bad enough I can always vanish down to the grin.
While you’re at it, let the states pick their Senators again instead of being picked by popular vote.
Man, I’d be happy if people just had to show up and have ID when they vote. That’d split up the outcome a little bit here like it used to be. Harvesting means the slimiest get the spoils.
I always have to show ID when I vote. I don’t know what the problem is with that. I don’t want someone voting in my place.
Absentee ballots are invitations to voter fraud. I can see allowing those for servicemembers deployed overseas, but that should be the only exception, and that tightly controlled.
Require that they be notarized and submitted with a copy of the id used at the notary. We close real estate transactions remotely all the time. It isn’t like we don’t have a sytem for establishing identity.
My problem is that it leads us down the path to a national ID card system. It’s bad enough that SSNs have become a de facto national ID number, I don’t want to encourage the creation of a de jure database to just to exercise a fundamental right.
I think that ship has sailed.
It has, and it infuriates me.
I don’t know…. You still have to register to vote on a roll. Unless we gave a ballot to anyone who entered a polling station.
I live in a same-day registration state.
But don’t look at me, Look at North Dakota.
“I think that ship has sailed.”
Yeah, it sailed.
I don’t want foreign nationals or dead people to vote, but I also do not want to show something like a passport for domestic travel.
It can be discussed at length. But unfortunately, the path of more government always seems to lead to greater harm instead of greater good.
Interesting that North Dakota doesn’t do registration.
As for Same Day, you still are registering. I Get not wanting to have an ID to exercise the vote. I have to think about it.
Let me be contrarian here. I agree one should never need to show ID to exercise a fundamental right, because fundamental rights are not granted by the State and therefore should not be restricted by the State. Voting is not a fundamental right. It is not even a right. It is a privilege of citizenship.
If I must pay taxes, then I must be allowed that privilege. A lot of bohea was spilled to remind the world of that.
That is not the case even in our largely democratized republic, and was even less true when it was founded. It is certainly an arguable position and I don’t mean to dismiss it outright, but actually applying it would greatly expand the franchise. Children, resident aliens, illegal aliens, and even tourists pay taxes of one sort or another.
See comment above about the Democrats losing control of Congress…permanently.
YAAASSSSS!!
I just want the Trump Bucks, it’s mine anyway,
I think it’s fun to think about, and to think about some of the political consequences if it did happen. Obviously these would never happen. Just like making 100 states out of DC would never happen.
Fuck WordPress.
I feel bad for SP having to fix this several times a day. I assume it is due to traffic.
It seems the changes have been more frequent of late.
I’d be interested in the city state model. Any county over X million population becomes a city state. If it’s adjacent to another city state, it has the option to merge into the adjacent city state.
Interesting idea. Ok, so Baltimore City is not the same as Baltimore County; does the county and the city become the same entity? What becomes of counties that don’t make the cut, do they just stay as the state they’re in?
Do you really want to give two senators to each major urban area? Kiss your rights goodbye.
blow the Bridges over the Colorado River, and minefields all the way to Canada!
Seal off the West coast, it’s the only way,
Another approach that would be fun is to abolish local jurisdiction in favor of a limited national one.
Representatives would find voters from wherever; as long as you have 750k people “vote” for you, you’re a Congresscritter. I don’t know what kind of brain chip and national ID that would require (shudders), but, when you lose enough of your constituency because they moved their marker to some other guy, you’re out of office: bye.
I’m interested in any plan that decreases the ability of others to vote away my rights and my money. Don’t much care how it’s pulled off. Maybe we just mandate the following of the constitution and call it done. Naw, that’ll never work. There will just be some “emergency” which trumps (drink!) that plan.
STAY INSIDE OR WE WILL SHOOT YOU
I just spent 5 hours mowing and didn’t get shot. Probably will be droned tonight.
Your ideal can be more real the smaller government gets.
If the government were as small as it should be, few would even want to be president or governor.
Whatever we come up with, it’ll just end up hurting us Three times as bad!
Don’t misunderstand me, it’s a long song but give it a chance.
“Our analysts say that Mitt Romney would still be a douche in this situation.”
Some damn fine analysis, this is why I come here.
nice, fine article Leon. how did you come up with the splits for the Senate? I guess someone has already tallied who got goes from which county. ..was it that simple?
For the second one i pulled data from here: https://github.com/tonmcg/US_County_Level_Election_Results_08-16/blob/master/2016_US_County_Level_Presidential_Results.csv
Any county that was within 5% in the election was split.
cool beand
sorry, I suffer from premature posting.
Cool how you can find so much data out there.
Romney is a douche in all possible timelines.
I’d like to upvote this post…
X2!
Let me know when we get around to burbclaves.
^This.
Only solution I see that allows me to choose my lifestyle and level of freedom.
Has anybody watched Exhibit A on Netflix? I just started and it seems quite interesante.
Fuck all of this, let’s just go back to an absolute monarchy.
You saying Hamilton was right all along?
Only if I am the monarch.
Colorado would be pretty easy to split. Draw an egg shape around the Denver metro including Boulder with a right arm extended up I-70 to Glenwood Springs with an inverted FU finger going South all the way through Aspen into the bulbous fingernail that is Gunnison County. Left out are the rest of us to do as we please. Yes, I one armed FU Egg. They could be Eggtopia. Although, I would settle for a split along the Continental Divide.
“What other interesting ways could we split the states?”
Didn’t they already try that in 1860 something? /deliberate misread
Give everyone the chance to be their own state.
Also, bring back filibusters. 😉
“Give everyone the chance to be their own state.”
That’s where I’m at.
Let several million nations bloom!
Split the major metropolises into separate state-like kinds of things. Give each one a senator, and count the residents as 3/5ths of a person for the repesentatives.
Naw, give the municipal authorities the option of greater local control if they give up national influence.
For leon and all others who like this kind of thing, check out General Knowledge on YouTube. It’s a channel devoted to a lot of ‘what if’ questions on geography.
How The States Might Have Got Their Shapes?
That was all about Waterways and access to the Ocean, also on YT,
Howdy!
How about if every state were it’s own country?
Technically, they kinda are. The several states are sovereign entities, the only practical implication of which is that the feds and one or more states can try you separately for the same crime. The states each have a Secretary of State, which is mostly a ceremonial post since foreign diplomacy and border control has been ceded to the federal government.
In theory. Reason call it no-longer-federal government.
Now we’re talking, with free and uninhibited immigration between the states
…with a requirement to remain there, in the new state, for 3 years…
Dammit – “its’ “. Teds already pissed at me.
You’re lucky
Ass Wednesday demands representation for each cheek!
http://archive.li/djP77
Carriejune Bowlby makes two appearances in this gallery.
All of the women in the gallery are welcome in my bed.
Thicc twice in one day? Yippee! #2 is #4 from earlier, yummmm,
/double checks
You’re right.
She’s a cutie.
NSFW
https://www.instagram.com/p/B-vZZrFhkLW/?igshid=ao16c6oic5ss
Rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic at this point.
Rearranging deck chairs has never really been tried.
And, the band played on…
Hey you never know, Maybe the ship wouldn’t have sunk if the chairs were in a different configuration.
Sorry, I meant Lusitania.
SS Minnow?
I just verified, I’m out on Covid19 leave until the 30th. I wish I could have gone to the lake as planned, but that was cancelled. I have got to getaway!
The 30th of April? But Ezekiel Emanuel says we must all stay in our homes for 18 months. And he’s an expert. Why won’t anyone listen to our experts?
Well, they just sent out an FFRCA memo which insinuated I hadda go back in a week or start losing money. They have the option to extend, but for now, I’m clear until the end of the month.
You could always fly.
If you want to talk about states splitting, what about VA? You have a very tiny region of the state, NOVA now in complete rule of the statehouse and going completely prog batshit crazy. I’d be getting really pissed right now if I was among the completely disenfranchised majority of that state. NOVA is not even a part of VA in reality any longer, it’s part of DC.
I fully support the idea of a South Virginia. DC can keep the NoVa region – it’s mostly govt employees anyway.
The difference between say Fairfax and the hollers out in the mountains are… striking
We were content to let the proggies in Fairfax prog out in their own county but now they’re determined to foist their bullshit on the rest of us, too. I’m eyeing replacement states. Any state that hasn’t issued general lockdown orders has moved to the top of the list.
It’s happening all over the country, it’s just that VA is a particularly striking example of it. Not surprising when you have the metro spillover coming from a region (DC) who vote 99% democrat.
But like someone here mentioned a while back, I forget when or who. But it’s not a state thing anymore. It’s regional. It’s metro areas vs everyone else in the region.
There had better be a solution or this is not going to turn out too well. And it’s not going to be the prog’s overturn the Electoral College bullshit. The founder saw this coming, only they didn’t see the exact scale of it.
Maybe people’s newfound fear of foreign viruses will start to spread people out more. Not an ideal solution, but…
Maybe limits on what each state government can DO. Knowing now that Coonman has successfully locked down the state without a general revolt, he’s going to do it again, it’s just a question of when. I’d like the legislature to write something that makes it impossible to order ‘nonessential businesses’ closed, or order people to stay home until say, 50% of the population has died. I’m flexible on the percentage, but it needs to be a really *high* percentage; something approaching ‘everyone else is dead, so stay home while we clean up the bodies.’
The only solutions will require currently unthinkable things such as shrinking the franchise, repealing several amendments, etc.
Otherwise demographics wins.
We can’t let population density demographics win. That’s why we have the electoral college to begin with.
I don’t think this gets solved without major cultural and social upheaval. Thus why I’m #collapsitarian.
All the incentives point toward being a busy-body with no negative consequences for doing so. The community checks and balances against the neighborhood ninny are long gone, the litigious nature of our society make people go ultra precautionary, and frankly we’re more than a little soft as a society.
Thats not something you evolve out of. It’s something that fails like a dam once a crack gets big enough.
The line between DC suburbs and VA is very stark. Culturally, you could draw a sharp line between the two. That said, it’s a moving line as the drones expand further and further each day.
As we “what if?” It’s important to note that populations will move, and also people will vote differently if they think their vote matters.
So basing outcomes on existing voting habits isn’t valid if the rules are changed.
That’s why we have to build walls around the cities.
+1 Snake Plisken
Sorry Rhy
You know those wetmarkets that loosed this wonderful unplanned vacation maker upon the world? Well they’ve gotten a bad rap:
https://mobile.twitter.com/economics/status/1246295308189011969
Ah Bloomberg, don’t ever change.
-1 food desert
Qu’ils mangent de la b̶r̶i̶o̶c̶h̶e̶ bat !
*shrugs*
I agree, to be honest. But now is not the time.
Well, that went off the rails very quickly. With a special guest appearance by Krugabe.
What other interesting ways could we split the states?
A state for each person?
Each with an individual number inscribed the the Forehead?
You know who else identified people with tattoos?
Ricardo Montalbán ?
*snort
De Plane, De Plane boss!
Corinthian leather, R2D2.
Salamanca Styrofoam…
But boss, how did you do dees!
R2D2, Mr. Roarke can do anything. Do you want me to throw you into the volcano, R2D2?
Only after they deplane.
Marines ?
“A state for each person?”
Why stop there? A nation for each person.
That’s where I am at.
I have been a proponent of splitting up California for a while. I even have the sticker. State of Jefferson!
(And yes, I know that the chances of it happening are about the same as Steve Smith renouncing rape in favor of monogamous love).
I would have voted for that scotched proposition even if it wasn’t my platonic ideal.
Yeah, I didn’t really like the five state thing, but anything to split up this state at this point would get my vote.
You’re just mad because Hillary beat bad orange man by 3 million votes!
He just hasn’t found the perfect rapesquatch yet. Cynic.
One day his prince will come.
I’m always amused when some progtard starts complaining about how Wyoming is so over represented and they NEVER figure out their “problem” is actually California is too large. Cut Cali into 3 states and the ratio gets pretty normalized.
Mises Institute had a good article countering that. Yes Wyoming people have equal representation in the senate, but the amount power Cali has in the house is way higher.
State of Free Cascadia?
People in El Paso get nervous when they hear this kind of talk because El Paso sure as heck isn’t Texas and it doesn’t really fit in New Mexico. It really just makes sense to give it back to Mexico but El Pasoans are too uppity about their American status to want to become nothing but a bunch of Mexicans who speak pretty good English.
During my short lived truck driving career I drove through El Paso with a load of something I don’t remember. While traveling East on the 10 there is a stark difference between looking forward or north and looking south. Seemed a bustling place though.
Heck, everything along the Rio Grande is about the same…slowest invasion ever!
Thanks, Leon, for research and write up.
Agree Hayeksplosives and Jarflax consequences changing rules. Have to think about implications, consequences, and so on.
None of these will ever happen, but it’d be cool if they did.
Thanks SP!
Halleluia a Tornado watch! I got a news story that wasn’t about the virus!
We had a thunderstorm last night and my wife is scared of them. So I got up in the middle of the night to make sure all the flashlights could be located and candles could be lit, in case the power went out And then she got up too and we hung out a while.
That’s our big exciting moment of the last 2 weeks quarantine.
Wrong. The virus can go airborne so you are dead dead dead. They banned leaf blowers somewhere FFS.
“They banned leaf blowers somewhere FFS”
This was The Bee, right? I mean, did they ban the wind too?
Nope, real news.
It’s getting pushed elsewhere too.
That is literally the dumbest fucking shit I have ever heard so far since this shit started.
Exactly how much virus do they think a leaf blower can blow around compared to the natural wind?
Our ‘leaders’ are getting dumber by the fucking minute.
“However, there are studies linking blowing to infection.”
/Winston’s mom has yet to comment
leaf blowers should be banned because of the ungodly amount of particulates they throw in the air.
AS opposed to….?
Orphans with combs.
Up here too. The skies are angry.
Buckle-up buckaroo….you guys are getting it hard & fast down there
For a long time I have proposed that all of the Indian Tribes in the US be incorporated as the 51st state.
A huge contention point is that the US is supposed to recognize the Tribes as unique nations while retaining them as part of the US. We now have overlapping laws about citizens who happen to live on reservation land that are somehow immune to the laws of the state surrounding it.
So the Tribes become a state and each individual tribe would be treated like a county (or something). Makes all of those citizens equal to the citizens of the rest of the country. Eliminates the BIA and all other Federal rot.
“For a long time I have proposed that all of the Indian Tribes in the US be incorporated as the 51st state.”
A 2nd Trail of Tears.
I’d suggest either Manhattan, or Nancy Pelosi’s back yard.
Except many of them hate each other so that would be interesting.
Cherokees vs Apaches live on TV!
Fuck all y’alls, I just want the Eastern Rockies back. Fuck Montana.
Why do we hate Montana?
Cause Brokeback Mountain. Queer.
Idaho Territory was a rectangle. When Montana became a state, the bastards took everything on the east side of the Rockies. That’s why Idaho is shaped like a fine, old revolver.
You misspelled penis
“I fully support your right to voluntarily give up your constitutional rights.”
It’s fun trolling my progressive friends on FB.
And I just found out I’m getting a $5K raise next year. Woohoo!
I’d say Woohoo too about that if I were you.
I’m fairly confident I’ll keep my job, but we don’t get our raises until fiscal year begin (July 1), and I don’t expect it to be as good this time. Bummer.
I’m an asshole for putting that here. Sorry. My enthusiasm got the better of my judgement.
No. I don’t blame you man. I’d be happy too and I’m happy for you! Just saying, not sure if everyone can expect that in light of this clusterfuck. But we can always hope so!
What I’m seeing is gratitude from my employers for sticking it out and being flexible on what they need. 90% of success, showing up blah, blah. This country is still open for bizness if you’re willing to risk da macorona.
I’m getting a lot of appreciation from my boss/team lead, and team for my biggest client. Which is probably my best shot at getting the biggest raise, even though ultimately decided by the organization.
My clients, or stakeholders, they’re fucking assholes by nature. But that’s the way it goes. They need me, but they’ll never admit it.
And I’m happy to be one of us lucky folks still at work. It’s all really weird, but we’ll get through it.
Nah, you are justifiably happy, and we should be happy for you. Congratulations on the raise.
Why? I’m happy for you. I do recommend setting aside an appropriate portion from each paycheck and pinning to the garment of your choice (train fare).
Thx, guys. My lifestyle hasn’t really changed from when I made $25k at 23 years old. The wife will be happy, though.
You know. My lifestyle has changed a lot since I was 23, and I was making less than 25K then. But only because of money. Me, I haven’t changed much. I’m still a sarcastic asshole who enjoys beer.
Damn.
I need a $5K raise.
Ignore that comment. Fun article.
Don’t worry about it, I’m happy you get a raise, you deserve it.
Thanks!
?
I work somewhere that since the Gov stretched out cower at home until the 26th and fully expect large gatherings will most likely be banned until who knows when I will lose my job in a few months. That does not mean I won’t take joy in someone else’s success. Only assholes and socialists do that I am not that kind of asshole.
Thanks, man. We can hope the “Pent up demand!” theory proves right. I doubt it, but if it happens, great.
Congrats on the raise! I’m grateful my job (while way busier) has otherwise been unchanged. My brother in law was just told he had a choice: continue working full time at a 20% paycut until this bullshit ends, and hope the company makes it up to him eventually, or work one day less a week and take a 20% pay cut. None of us should be losing our jobs over a fucking virus and I want to kick every governor in the balls that made such a decision.
I’m sort of hoping for another 3% raise from my biggest client again this year. That’s pretty much the biggest one I can hope for. My other clients don’t really give raises. I mean I can demand it by raising my rates, but it’s sort of risky right now and some of them might not be around, but they probably will be. So I’m just wanting that sweet 3%.
I still remember the glory days when I got a 12% raise, or just raised my hourly rate by $25 an hour and they gladly paid it. The good old days, and I didn’t even have to wear an uncomfortable mask when I went outside. Stories for the grandchildren…
Knock on would.
Right now I’m pulling for increases for my two minions, who deserve it immensely and were putting in tremendous work before the commie cough struck and have continue to do so during. After that, maybe I’ll start making noise about a raise for myself.
Wishing you the best. We all need it, and I think we’ll come through this soon enough. Well, not soon enough, but soon.
More hookers and blow? No sharing straws with the hookers tho, we have a pandemic going on and that wouldn’t be prudent.
おめでとう！Good going fellow Gaijin. Good to hear that somebody who deserves it is getting ahead regardless of the current situation.
Hey, I know! Let’s just divide the country up into, say, 12 or 13 districts based on the predominant industries and natural resources in each…
Oh…wait…
Natural resources seem to be overrated.
This is why you really were always the worst.
Let the games begin, Panem!
The odds are ever in my favor.
I like the sort of edge on that attitude.
Fun fact: The very first gift Mr. GT ever gave me, shortly after we got together, was a mug that said “I <3 my Attitude Problem."
He had me pegged from the get-go.
“He had me pegged”
OK, I mean whoa! That’s not my business!
You typed it so I didnt have to.
“You typed it so I didnt have to.”
Always glad to offer my services.
Cottage cheese > Ricotta in lasagna. Fight me.
My meat sauce was so thick I could only do two layers of noodles so this creation is damn near keto as far as I know. Just went in the new oven.
What’s really good in lasagna is pineapple.
Lasagna is properly made as a flat hand tossed disk, with pineapple. This deepdish non-pineapple stuff is pizza pure and simple.
Ya had to go there eeeh?
Needs more Cincinnati chili.
Goldstar, you wokesters!
Ugh….Jugsy has that fight with me whenever she’s in the mood for Coney’s. To me Goldstar = Skyline. But not to her “cultured” Cleremont County palate. Has to be Goldstar. FWIW- Camp Washington or Dixie is still better than either.
I sort of got over it when I took Goldstar as a base and started making better chili myself, around 20 years ago.
I still remember when my wife started living with me as a new immigrant here.
I made chili, and I swear this is the exact words she said to me ‘Soup of beans? What is this!? When I was a little girl, my mama tried to make me eat soup of beans! I don’t like it, I won’t eat soup of beans!’.
LOL
I said ‘It’s not bean soup, it’s Chili’.
So she said ‘Chili, what is that? It looks like soup of beans. I won’t eat it!’.
So, fast forward, I kept making my chili and she kept not eating it. Until she did.
And then one day she said ‘Hey, if you want to cook today, can you make some of that chili?’.
Of course I was like ‘WTF? Bean soup!?’.
Proper chili does not have beans. Change my mind.
Cannot do. Chili should or at least could have beans. But only Pinto beans, never any other type.
You’re discussing Goldstar and Skyline what does ‘proper chili’ have to do with that?
Or, I’ll go with this.
It doesn’t matter if chili has beans, or not (as long as they’re pinto beans, anyone who puts kidney beans in chili should be pilloried in the public square for a fortnite), the 2 most important ingredients in chili are:
Cumin
Spice (peppers and other)
Secondary, some sort of texture, I use tomato paste and cornmeal.
It isn’t chili at all.
Miss me with that ish.
Bravo! *Pukes*
I can’t even.
Lasagna night for us as well per son’s request – I mix ricotta and cottage cheese (plus other ingredients).
Aaaah, I might try this. I like the taste of Ricotta but find it too dry and don’t care for the texture. I like that work around!
Neither is necessary as long as one uses a thick and rich enough béchamel sauce.
I can’t imagine a lasagna that doesn’t have cheese strands when you cut it
I may be wrong but I don’t believe the ricotta or cottage cheese is what gives lasagna it’s stringy cheesiness, for that you’re gonna have to add plenty of parm an/or mozz.
A mozz provolone blend is what gives a stringy cheesy pull. And is what all superior pizzas are topped with. When you layer that with cottage or ricotta it adds a creaminess to the mix. I have seen the bechamel done and I am very much not opposed, but who has time for that when they forgot to make dinner.
I will not fight you. I will join you.
I use mozzarella, parmesan, cottage, but I have never use provolone. I’ll try that.
Give me a heads up on how it would far with extra sharp cheddar mixed in.
Use extra sharp provolone instead of cheddar for some piquancy.
It smells like the balls of a man who hasn’t showered in a week, and tastes even better!
Now I feel like making lasagna. Or enchiladas.
“damn near keto as far as I know”
Unless you used slices of zucchini instead of noodles,I’m going to rate this as mostly false.
Still sounds delicious.
Look he’s already failed at lasagna, once you don’t have noodles, you aren’t even making the same dish.
The muzak/instrumental version of Satisfaction proves how awful that song really is.
**barf!**
I’m trying very hard to not imagine what that sounds like.
I’ve finally found some quality content on Youtube.
You gotta scrape the goop off before eating that. Barbarian. And why did I know she was Korean at first sight?
what was the black egg thing?
A 1,000 year egg.
Much less disgusting than what I thought it was.
That’s at least a little sexier than what I’ve heard mukbang is.
That might possibly be the most fucked up thing I have ever seen since the last time I clicked on one of your links.
There’s plenty of quality on YouTube
Once again, HM posts a link I couldn’t stop watching. Nice work.
I want to know that the mark is on her arm here
I’d rather watch surgery on eyeballs while petting tarantulas than watch somebody sucking that slimy shit down their throat. Okra and oysters are bad enough. Gross.
Between that, and straff’s link, it’s no wonder that the cephalopods hate us.
WTF is wrong with the people who made that video?
Hunger, apparently. Nasty, foul hunger.
And, maybe some perv thrown in.
I’d say we should carve out a state just for libertarians, but we’d never agree where that should be.
On your lawn?
I’d agree to the entire US.
Why think small? Earth.
Fuck that shit, you small thinkers. At least the local Super Cluster while we can still get there!
That is why we need a cruise ship and argue where to go.
Ship of Fools II: Libertarian Boogaloo
I’m alright with it, as long as we can call it Boaty McBoatface II
Greenland.
Trump’s got it all planned out for us.
Don’t worry. Everyone else will be under water and we’ll rule the world.
I’ve already covered that option.
lol
Some of CPRM’s best work.
Embrace global warming. Iceland used to be green, and now Greenland is mostly ice.
The Medieval warm period is part of the great Right Wing conspiracy. I think this was uncovered by Hillary in the 90s. And covered up again when Trumputin stole the 2016 election and denied HER the crown.
Liar. All credit goes to Gore.
http://archive.li/XNl7M/51cbf218a6d1f9c8fb3180bf7bebdda36f1e6509.jpg
NSFW.
http://archive.li/etWiS/669b73e5e3f238d9bdaa12560d8c816acd2ee4ee.jpg
NSFW.
http://archive.li/hjcgB/67d22132c33d522a542d489ba04659977641385e.jpg
NSFW.
http://archive.li/I1QHl/f3de2f803796c059b31368ea410b76873894fa08.jpg
NSFW.
Voted for George W _ _ _ _
Went back and reread parts of Dante’s Inferno. Hot take 1: Virgil is a dick head tour guide. 2: The rings of hell don’t get worse as you descend. They all seem to suck equally.
I thought you were hip!? Why not just watch the Anime?
So thats where Peter Jackson stole the idea from…..
Looks kind of fun.
You know, C’s not exactly wrong on the hip/anime solution.
Excellent tip. I put it on my watchlist. Thank ewe!
Don’t ever say that to a film maker again!
But … I spelled it Ewe, not Uwe.
It doesn’t matter what you said, it matters what I interpreted! I can’t even with these microagressions!
Are you SURE there is absolutely no way you can even?
Are you questioning my lived experience!? I always knew you were a Nazi!
He is odd like that…
Nuh uh! Nam not needer!
+ XX Canto
If you’re gonna do it right, the first ring should be the sinner is forced to eat circus peanuts for eternity. Then you progress from there.
You fucking monster. Circus Peanuts and those stupid Bugle chips. And candy corn.
For shame.
Bugles & Circus Peanuts were a staple at my grandparents house when I was young. Now, as a drunk 20-something with a can of spray-cheese to caulk the Bugles with, I could kinda appreciate them. But dry?
And Circus Peanuts could be used for interrogation instead of waterboarding.
Bugles are awesome. They got me through high school.
The highest and best use of Circus Peanuts is as packing material.
The final ring would be a bottomless bowl of Cap’n Crunch without milk.
only orange juice to eternally sear the gaping wounds in your mouth from Crunch Berries?
/math checks out
No we’re outdoing Dante. Also, the pulp is actually dried and peeled lip skin.
So canker sores ?
I had to deal with “new states” in a book wherein the Confederacy had won the Civil War. I came up with Missouri joining the Union and Kentucky joining the Confederacy, except for several eastern counties that joined West Virginia. On the other hand, the three WV eastern panhandle counties rejoined Virginia. Delaware ceased to exist: Sussex county in the south voted to combine with Maryland and Virginia eastern shore counties to form the new Confederate state of Chesapeake, along with Maryland’s counties to the south of Washington, DC. The two other Delaware counties, Kent and New Castle, joined what was left of Maryland, and Maryland stayed in the Union.
That is a rather interesting idea, and I now kinda wish we had a state named Chesapeake.
Yes, yes; rest your sphincters–I’ve arrived, and am ready to chat/banter/snark.
1% charge on my phone. Damn.
Dammit, phone battery!
Bought a charger. Carry on.
Aww, man–that’s one of those purchases that seems so unnecessary. As in, if you just in a completely different* country, I’d give you a charger.
*as opposed to only a partially different country?
::SIGH:: “if you just weren’t in a….etc, etc”
True. I’ve got quite the collection at home.
If you tax it surely it will create more electricity. (I know, I should work in government being so smaht, no need to flatter me)
*unclenches*
Well put!
I’m still hoping for an answer to my reply to #40- WTF is that mark on her arm ?
I thought about doing yardwork today, but when I took the long walk to my mailbox it decided to start sprinkling, so I just said fuck it. It then proceeded to not precipitate there after.
I didn’t know you moved here!! Damned if that doesn’t happen every other morning here, in the last month.
They’re saying now we may get more snow…in April…thanks
Global WarmingCorona Virus!It’s refreshing!
Just got some fresh snow a few days ago in North Idaho.
Yesterday
It’s the Diggy! Hurrah.
Thank you, thank you. I would curtsy, but….you know.
I put some planned things off yesterday cause I was hoping to do yard-stuff, and it was supposed to rain in the afternoon. Not a drop.
VP talk could intensify with Harris fundraising moves Gropey Joe with a piece of hot chocolate like that? Them marshmallows will get thoroughly tested before …LOADING… steals the nom.
Egads.
Well, he did swear that his VP was gonna be a woman, after all. I was honestly expecting Schumer, with tits like that.
Why go for an unpopular former candidate in a deep blue state?
Not as bad as Warren, but still seems a poor strategic choice.
Black Woman (maybe she’s trans too, I dunno)
Obama should just have been president for life
Only Trump would do that! No one even thought about that before Trump! It’s partisan lies that Teddy Roosevelt and FDR seeked extra terms!
Why do candidates “suspend” their campaigns and not say just say “ending” their campaign? Something to do with campaign donations?
Or narcissism.
That’s how you answer a question.
So, you can build your warchest over decades even if you don’t win, as long as you suspend your campaign and not terminate it?
Damn straight. Mrs CommuBern still needs a paycheck.
Dear client: Please decide on a font. Please. Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeze!
I’ll have a cheeseburger, no a hamburger.
I wanted a cheeseburger without cheese!
All the vowels should be helvetica, except the ‘e’s, which must be Comic Sans. The first letter of each sentence is in Times New Roman, and the numbers are wingdings.
I’ll get back to you on the consonants.
What do you mean you want more money?
*uses webdings for the numbers* “Why the hell did you do that? Do I look like a person who would use webdings!?”
Papyrus. Go.
“Client, that would not be a wise decision.”
“Why not? I like it.”
“Everyone who doesn’t know any better uses it. It’s unprofessional.”
“Oh. Well, okay. I think we should go ahead and use it anyway. And don’t forget to credit yourself as the cover designer!”
“I’m not putting my name on that cover.” ← Actually happened.
“Don’t you get what I’m trying to do?”
“Yes. I like the concept. Still not putting my name on the cover.”
I’m sure it was frustrating, Mo, but that is quite funny.
Eh, she kinda thought it was funny. She’s been my client for 10 years. Right now we’re working on books 20 through 25.
Mo–I doubt you’ll see this, but:
I just imagine using a pseudonym, like some directors do: Alana Smithee.
/”Alana Smithee” sounds hawt
Comic Sans
?? (that’ll have to do until they add the actual masks as emojis).
Duly noted.
I’m certainly not Not Adahn- but Im going to predict that we’re going to see/hear a lot more about ‘herd immunity’ in the coming weeks, as ‘the curve’ doesnt just flatten- it pancakes.
And then we’ll hear “stay at home must remain to prevent a re-emergence”.
I’m certainly not Not Adahn – this denial makes me suspicious this is a Not Adahn sockpuppet
Panic In Place has created a situation where they will claim success in reducing the spread yet don’t dare raise it because of the inevitable increase in cases.
No matter the reality, whatever happens thanks to their totalitarian ‘precautions’ they’ll always claim it would have been worse with it.
Gee, Batman, this shark repellent really works!!
See, I knew you was quality people. Also: Rrrowr!
Yep. This ain’t over by a longshot. Sorry, America.
It’s pretty messed up that Lefties want more deaths and economic ruin do they can get power, and righty statists want panic so they can keep power.
Pathetic.
Strong-man validation: For the left, validation that government is needed. For the right, validation that trouble is right around the corner. Both say, “No, not for me–for those ‘others’ over there! They can’t be trusted, so, Government Powers, ACTIVATE!”
Pffft…f’ing Frenchie Canucks.
Jeebus. That’s awful.
Chag sameach Glibertarian. What did I miss?
Apparently a virus fell out of Lou Reed’s ass.
?
I would add something about the Browns, but, all things considered….??
?
?
Terroristic threats of coughing? Ooh, you better believe that’s
a pddlin’2-10 stretch: https://www.theblaze.com/news/teen-arrested-for-snapchat-video-spreading-coronavirusWhat the hell is a “teenage woman”?
Good question. I presume they are saying she’s an ‘adult’, but still in her teens.
Texas has ‘age of status’ for 17 year olds, and they are eligible to be in big boy jail then. But, she’s past that, so…the Blaze just channels Neil Diamond?
13~19. Teen women?
Around here, they’d be ‘young ladies’.
Really, it’s 13-16 = minors
17 = minor, but, age of status–just not an adult, really
18+ = adult
As to how that plays out in any kind of legal setting, depends on the issue and the government lackey dealing with it.
Me, personally–I’m just hoping she doesn’t end up in porn. ‘Cause…damn.
Around here they are called “harmless idiots”. They see the world in binary “Kawaii!” and “Kimochi waruri” ( gross).
I suppose we could farm her out to Japan, if you like.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRLBdOr1eZo
That is downright scary. First thing I thought of.
Not this?
https://youtu.be/R04qRuMV0Qc
The fact that Neil wrote it has been seared into my mind, so, when it comes up, my brainz quickly kick UO to the side.
They were a flash in the pan. I’ll give them credit for introducing me to the song.
It’s kinda like when they put the “children victims of gun violence” label on a 17 year old MS-13 gangbanger shot while doing drive-by
Gee, dipshit; it’s almost like relying on government actors to handle these situations is problematic.
DB: Dumb Bastards
She wants to fellate Bernie or Biden. Give her a break.
I actually think it’s a guy, BION. Still, I think you are correct, in either situation.
Uh oh–I binaried xim. (why do I hear that word as “heeem” in my head?)
Paging Chafed, to the blue courtesy phone.
Wow. That homeowner is one tough mother. Good for him.
Tomorrow night when I open the door for Elijah I might be packing.
Umm…euphemism? I am out of the loop on this.
It’s Passover my goy friend.
Yes–I’m your Goy Boy. ✡??
Hey! There we go: Chafe-Man and the Goy Wonder!
??
Can we have the swirling background with a quick zoom in and out of a menorah?
In this style?
I like it!
As an aside, I get the sense this isn’t the whole story. The two perps went to the house because of a cash pile one of them saw 20 years ago. I suppose it’s possible but it seems unlikely.
I think you’re correct, but, no other narrative yet. Plus, criminals….
I’m not completely ruling it out. I saw some incredibly stupid acts back when I did criminal defense.
But… my spider sense tells me one of the guys has a connection, possibly by degrees of separation, to the homeowner.
Yeah, the smoke/fire sense. Of course, drugs are a helluva drug, too. Who the hell knows at this point.
Seems to me, though, that, if they did know the homeowner, they probably knew what he was capable of.
Dipshits.
Definitely dips hits.
Dippin’ dots.
/eeeeww
Instead of X number of Americans, I wish they’d use X number per 1000 Americans.
It’s the X games, doncha know.
The American press is largely innumerate. They don’t even know the importance of thinking that way.
Boy, I tell ya–“April”, amirite?
So we are down to it being as deadly as another flu season. Can we go back to work now?
Doctor is asshole
I don’t know much about Louisville. I imagine it’s the sort of place a bystander might just beat the living shit out of the doctor.
I imagine there we some ‘plenty pissed off’ parents that heard/will hear a “cha-CHING” somewhere in the back of their minds.
Mrs. Dr. Asshole better hope these people are willing to settle.
Hadn’t thought of that but you’re right.
She is so incredibly tone deaf and inarticulate. I hope Biden picks her.
https://dailycaller.com/2020/04/08/kamala-harris-donald-trump-hydroxychloroquine-drug-pusher-president/
She’s just getting her fans (barf) ready for a new way to prosecute him.
I don’t. I don’t want her to ever be that close to the presidency. Even if Biden loses.
She’s probably the most toxic of the failed candidates. Uses slave labor and plays the race card. Fuck that cunte with Warty’s Hog.
For our late-nite cat owners: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxxjHRJnQX0
I’m embarrassed to admit there was a time I respected Thomas Friedman.
https://twitchy.com/brettt-3136/2020/04/07/merrick-garland-lives-nyt-columnist-puts-al-gore-and-aoc-on-joe-bidens-bipartisan-unity-cabinet-to-ensure-victory/
Of course, the ‘rah rah go TEAM BE RULED” shit is…well, shit. That said, doesn’t it sort of tell others that, when you don’t like your party’s elected leader, and push for the other team to win…doesn’t that kind of tell anyone paying attention that there really isn’t any difference between the TEAMS?
Isn’t that really what Friedman is getting at, whether he consciously thinks it, or not?
His early books were enthralling. Once his shticks became clear, not so much.
https://apnews.com/8ccd325c2be9bf454c2128dcb7bd616d
“Some doctors moving away from ventilators for virus patients”
”Generally speaking, 40% to 50% of patients with severe respiratory distress die while on ventilators, experts say. But 80% or more of coronavirus patients placed on the machines in New York City have died, state and city officials say.”
So…ventilators are bad now?
I’m so confused.
“X% of coronavirus patients NOT admitted to hospitals die, but >X% of coronavirus patients who ARE admitted to hospitals die!!! ERMAGERD! Hospitalization killzzz!”
https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2020/04/08/British-man-retakes-worlds-largest-Rubiks-cube-record/5531586364888/
Whelp, stupidly poisoning myself on Tuesday had consequences today. I need to remind myself that I’m not 17 anymore. Fucking dummy. I made it through my shift and any of the Yellow Peril should be dead and gone from my lungs thanks to me being a Goofus. What a silly thing to do and so easy.
I think I saw you hint at that yesterday. Dare I ask what you did? Maybe mix some stuff that shouldn’t oughta be mixed? Use stuff w/o proper ventilation?
No mixing but I used a toxic cleanser in an enclosed space and sprayed above my head. It misted down into my face and once I got started on the job I didn’t want to stop. Today was pretty miserable. Started thinking I might have the Covid. Sniffles, sneezing, nose-bleeds and runs on TP. Not fun. Lost about three pounds, dead reckoning. Better now but scared the literal shit outta me.
Yikes! Don’t do that! : (
I know better but I’m as stubborn as a mule. I won’t quit until the last punch is thrown. Yusef and I have very much in common, apparently. The symptoms are mostly gone now so I guess I survived yet another misadventure. I’m not using that product ever again.
That’s a long winded explanation of huffing Festus. Nose bleeds? Damn.
Nose bleeds are a chronic condition for me. Got me kicked off the wrestling team in school.