Tuesday Afternoon Links

by | Apr 21, 2020 | Daily Links | 398 comments

Man, I am just beat today. Could be the generalized anxiety of all of this, or the specific anxiety of having to build myself a website and pick business cards in the increasingly likely case I start working for the worst boss in the world (myself). Do people actually use business cards any more? Also, where does one get a cheap logo designed? On the upside, we got our new washer and dryer delivered today (old dryer took a shit, and both were about 15 years old — sometimes its just time to bite the bullet). And my 4 year old showed me a cool roller coaster he had created all by himself on Minecraft.

You know, this made me tear up a little.

I’m not sure I want this person teaching anyone. The sheer volume of protest tells me that a lot of pedagogical experts are pretty concerned that the average 2nd grader is going to be at least as well prepared for 3rd grade after school shut down for the last 3 months as they would have been otherwise. Personally, I’ve decided my kids don’t deserve to be free. Back to school in the fall.

This made me tear up also, but not in the good way.

News none of you wankers needed to learn.

This is me, but on conference calls.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

398 Comments

  1. Brochettaward

    I’d go gay for Bert.

    • Jarflax

      You’d go gay for Elmo.

  2. westernsloper

    You know, this made me tear up a little.

    That got a very legit LOL. “You did the Reich thing” is stolen.

    • Sean

      “and coofed in my direction”

      LOL

    • R C Dean

      Hat tip for previously posting that link graciously accepted.

      • Ted S.

        Last time I asked for a hat-tip, I got cat-butted.

      • R C Dean

        Good thing I didn’t ask.

      • DEG

        YES

  3. RBS

    “Do people actually use business cards any more?”

    I have a ton of them…that never see the outside of my office.

    • Drake

      Every time I walk into a restaurant with a “free-lunch” jar for business cards.

    • Ownbestenemy

      It really depends on the business card thing. My wifes clientele are north of 50 and ask her all the time for a card. Its simple with the logo and a phone number.

      One thing I notice, all people we gave the cards to flip them over to see if it was double sided. Our next set will play on the Vegas Strong.

      Younger clients just want a number to text. Older wanted something physical.

      All depends on who you are trying to reach.

    • R C Dean

      I rarely give them out. People mostly don’t want any professional contact with me.

      After I retire, I am looking forward to having a set made for my post-retirement consulting biz that say, in their entirety:

      R C Dean
      Special Circumstances

      That’s right, no contact info. If anybody asks, I will just tell them I will be in touch.

      • juris imprudent

        Oh I like that idea, but with a twist, off The Equalizer…

        “Got a problem, need help, odds against you, Call [smudged to illegibility]”

      • The Hyperbole

        Wire is a really cool first name.

      • Mojeaux

        That is brilliant. I think. Do they work?

      • Agent Cooper

        The ‘Rona has rendered them temporarily useless. We shall see hopefully soon.

      • Tundra

        Yes.

        I like those.

  4. Tonio

    “homeschooled children will not be able to contribute to a democratic society”

    IOW, won’t be sheeple who will toe the authoritarian lion.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      This is purely about control. She has her predetermined acceptable ways of thinking. Teaching outside of that is verboten.

      • Tonio

        It’s worse than that. It has long been a trope of the left that home-schooled children aren’t properly “socialized” (broken by the system). The fear is that these children will insist on their individual rights and not knuckle-under to the collective as government-schooled children do. It’s kulturkampf all the way down, bro.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yeah. They fail to recognize that they inherited that little principle from Fichte, an ideological forebear of the Nazis.

      • Tonio

        Oh, look at Mr Erudite Boy.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Hey, don’t fault me for reading one book in the last ten years. I’m on a roll.

        I might get another book finished by the time I’m sixty.

      • leon

        see my story i posted in the previous thread. Much of the “Not socalized” aspect is that you are not trained to have to ask for permission for everything. In most schools you have to get permission to: Use the restroom, Get a drink, step out to blow your nose/cough, or to leave for something like a doctors appointment. I never got used to that and got flack from teachers who were upset that i didn’t conform to their absolute authority.

      • Hyperion

        Imagine the teacher’s horror when the kids finally return to School, next school year, and they’re all waving little Gadsden flags and quoting Bastiat.

    • Charles Easterly

      “‘homeschooled children will not be able to contribute to a democratic society'”

      This recalls conversations I have had with a small number of individuals, who either were parents who taught their children at home or were public school teachers/parents who were not willing or able to teach their own children at home.

      Basically, they all understood that there is a premise that home-schooled children would lack the socialization skills necessary to interact in a positive manner with everyone else and by implication will be not only at a disadvantage but possibly become anti-social.

      That is about that all the individuals had in common – the understanding of the premise. Where they disagreed was that the parents who chose to (or were able to) home-school (and the children of same) viewed themselves positively, whereas the other individuals viewed them negatively.

      • Jarflax

        My brother home schooled his kids for years and this is less of an issue than it is claimed to be. The parents of homeschoolers set up regular activities with multiple families’ kids working together. In fact his kids get more free range, kid only, no parent time than any of the public school kids I know.

      • Charles Easterly

        Jarflax,

        I think that we are in agreement in this regard.

  5. CPRM

    A question we can all ask the quarantine lovers, “Does the president have the authority to force Governor Wallace to let people into schools and restaurants?

    • UnCivilServant

      Arrest her on the charge of violating Michiganders’ constitutional rights to free association.

    • Tonio

      I see what you did there, CPRM.

  6. Spartacus

    “The issue is, do we think that parents should have 24/7, essentially authoritarian control over their children from ages zero to 18?” Bartholet asked. “I think that’s dangerous. I think it’s always dangerous to put powerful people in charge of the powerless, and to give the powerful ones total authority.”

    After all, there has never been a time in the history of the world when parents were solely responsible for raising their children.

    And I agree with the second part, but probably not in the way Prof. Bartholet thinks.

    • RBS

      She looks almost exactly like I imagined.

      • BakedPenguin

        At least 1/1024 Native American.

    • leon

      “I think an overwhelming majority of legislators and American people, if they looked at the situation, would conclude that something ought to be done,” Bartholet said.

      Either I, or this professor are divorced from reality.

      • CPRM

        What’s that alimony like?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Think about the cocoon she lives in.

        How much pushback on her ideas do you think she gets from her circle of friends, coworkers, and acquaintances? I’d bet none.

      • Tonio

        Negative pushback, ie she is rewarded for saying that.

    • Drake

      Clicked just to see if her name was Nikki.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Nah, Nikki would just set them loose at age 5.

      • westernsloper

        HA!

  7. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Are you a salesman or do you go to conventions?

    If not, you probably don’t need a business card. Unless you just want to be like Patrick Bateman.

    • westernsloper

      Fake news. Judging by the teeth he is British.

  8. The Late P Brooks

    You’ve got more important things to worry about than business cards

    Few places on the planet are more at risk from the climate crisis than south Florida, where more than 8 million residents are affected by the convergence of almost every modern environmental challenge – from rising seas to contaminated drinking water, more frequent and powerful hurricanes, coastal erosion, flooding and vanishing wildlife and habitat.

    If scientists are right, the lower third of the state will be underwater by the end of the century. Yet despite this grim outlook, scientists, politicians, environment groups and others are tackling the challenges head on.

    ——-

    By any estimation, Florida is drowning. In some scenarios, sea levels will rise up to 31in by 2060, a devastating prediction for a region that already deals regularly with tidal flooding and where an estimated 120,000 properties on or near the water are at risk. The pace of the rise is also hastening, scientists say – it took 31 years for the waters around Miami to rise by six inches, while the next six inches will take only 15 more.

    31 inches? How do these people not just burst into flames when they say this crap?

    • Mad Scientist

      “It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it.”

      ― Upton Sinclair

    • juris imprudent

      Time will run backwards until the tides comply.

    • l0b0t

      Hearty LOL! Florida is a bar of limestone with a water table, south of Ocala, at about 3 feet. The idea that the waters in Dade County have gone up 6 inches in 31 years is absurd.

    • creech

      ” Florida is drowning. In some scenarios, sea levels will rise up to 31in by 2060,”
      Now do Martha’s Vineyard.

      • juris imprudent

        That is a righteous state and it will float above the mean tide.

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      “By any estimation”. Somehow I don’t think that means what he thinks it does.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    “Climate gentrification” is a buzzword around south Florida, a region barely 6ft above sea level where land has become increasingly valuable in elevated areas. Speculators and developers are eyeing historically black, working-class and poorer areas, pushing out long-term residents and replacing affordable housing with upscale developments and luxury accommodations that only the wealthy can afford. In Miami, the controversial Magic City Innovation District in the neighborhood of Little Haiti is a billion-dollar, 17-acre, towering behemoth blending commercial, residential, entertainment and hotel space. It has drawn legal action from locals who say their rights have been trampled.

    OMG!

    • Rhywun

      “Climate gentrification” is a buzzword around south Florida

      LOL sure it is. Never change, comrades.

    • R C Dean

      Well, that would explain the crash in prices for beachfront mansions.

  10. Tonio

    Mmmm, Tom Selleck. Many fond teenage memories of him shirtless.

    • bacon-magic

      Shirtless? He’s so hairy it still looks like he’s wearing a shirt…oh, carry on then.
      STEVE SMITH IS HAIRY AND WILLING

      • Unreconstructed

        I had the same thought, then I looked at who posted it…

      • Tonio

        “so hairy it still looks like he’s wearing a shirt”

        That’s called “a sweater” in my world and it involves full torso fur coverage, and he’s nowhere near there. Not that he doesn’t have copious and luxuriant chest fur…

        He is like Farah Fawcett or Cheryl Tiegs was to you lads.

      • bacon-magic

        To each his/her own. You should of said Scarlett Johannson and Mila Kunich.

      • Brochettaward

        Given the age of the average Glib, that wouldn’t be appropriate. I’m surrounded by elderly.

      • bacon-magic

        *Kunis

      • Walford

        Cunte

      • Ozymandias

        Meh. The men in my family make Tom Selleck’s chest hair look patchy by comparison.
        I’ve been listening to the “take off the sweater!!” jokes in hockey locker rooms since college.

  11. Count Potato

    Schools aren’t just for education. They are also for babysitting people’s kids while they are at work, and shoveling tax dollars from homeowners who don’t even have kids.

    • westernsloper

      And lunches. Don’t forget the lunches. Parents have a constitutional right for you to feed their kid.

      • Gustave Lytton

        And breakfast and dinner.

        I wish I was kidding.

  12. Hyperion

    “You know, this made me tear up a little.”

    Hahahahhaaa, that cheered me up a little!

  13. mrfamous

    “a caller phoned in a tip that de Blasio was seen performing oral sex on someone ‘in an alleyway behind a 7-11′”

    Heroes still walk the earth

    • juris imprudent

      This giant still roams the earth, after establishing his claim to fame two years ago.

  14. Viking1865

    There’s a rumor flying around Facebook and other social media that Governor Coonman has been flying down to the Kill Devil Hills airport and being driven to his beach house. The rumor claims people have spotted him at the airport, and that driving by the house you see cars there. But, on the skeptical side apparently the house in question is actually owned by several people so the cars might not be Coonman and family.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    “The issue is, do we think that parents should have 24/7, essentially authoritarian control over their children from ages zero to 18?” Bartholet asked. “I think that’s dangerous. I think it’s always dangerous to put powerful people in charge of the powerless, and to give the powerful ones total authority.”

    Between this nutcase and the two idiots I linked to the other day, I think Harvard’s affirmative action hiring pool must consist almost exclusively of the criminally insane.

    • Count Potato

      It takes a village.

    • Tulip

      Always remember they wanted Chelsea Manning to be a fellow until the fallout got too heavy even for them.

  16. B.P.

    “I’m not sure I want this person teaching anyone.”

    Having read the article (!), it appears Fox News is hiring chimpanzees with clawhammers to type content.

    • Lady Z

      They should hire the manatees. Much better content.

  17. kinnath

    I have many good friends that are teachers. I don’t hold it against them.

    I see them post on Facebook everyday the cool projects they are working on to keep themselves busy while school is shut down — getting full pay.

    I am at home too, but I am working full time — soon to take a pay cut. I feel strong resentment towards my friends.

    My younger co-workers are also working at home and taking a paycut, but they are also trying to “school” their kids at the same time they are working. I wonder how they feel about teachers right now.

    • leon

      I’ve always been trying to convince my wife about homeschool. She gets a little tired of it because our kids are so young, but i always make sure to remind her how much better our kids are learning now than when they were at the pre-school. And i think she knows that too, because she’s told me how useless she thinks the assignments the teachers are coming up with are, and that she is not going to do them because they are a waste of time.

    • RAHeinlein

      My resentment towards others is growing by the day. Of course, I live in a government town so see the no-work/full-pay in all its glory. The “Economic Impact Payment” nonsense also has my blood boiling – apparently the income line in the sand has been drawn. Fuck anyone who makes more than $75K single/150K couple, but keep sending those sweet tax dollars.

    • Viking1865

      It’s Nobles and Peasants. Our household income has dropped by probably 50% since this started. We can hold like this for the forseeable future, but it’s holding without saving, without investing, without paying off student loans, without taking a vacation or buying something like a new mattress.

      I try not to be angry, I don’t want to be angry, I don’t enjoy it. But I have so much anger right now, I’m so filled with searing white hot rage whenever I see some fucking worthless parasite virtue signaling about how they’re a hero for ordering delivery and binging Netflix. Or worse, when I see someone on the Internet calling the protesters racists or wishing death on them while they collect a government check or work their bullshit regulation created HR job.

      There’s not been even the slightest gesture of real solidarity by any public sector employee, that I have seen. Not one of these polticians or bureaucrats have said “I am remitting my paycheck to the state unemployment fund until this crisis passes.” FDRs sons all served in uniform. He was a worthless parasite but his three sons were in the war he maneuvered the US into. He had skin in the game. Our current governmental elites not only drive us into poverty and capitivity, but they demand we thank them for it, and they call us Nazis if we protest.

      • Winston

        The aristocracy of old loved to personally fight in wars and plenty got themselves killed.

      • kbolino

        This tendency rather did them in World War One, though.

      • creech

        ” Florida is drowning. In some scenarios, sea levels will rise up to 31in by 2060,”
        Now do Martha’s Vineyard.

    • Agent Cooper

      I want a property tax refund.

  18. Mojeaux

    All of my business cards are ALSO sitting somewhere around here, forgotten and unloved.

    That said, if you’re out somewhere and you can’t give people the name of your website (don’t have a pen or paper or whatever), a business card with JUST your web address on it is a handy thing to have.

    Or else just pull up a QR code on your phone and let them either follow that or take a picture of it.

    • UnCivilServant

      I was wondering if people ever actually used QR codes.

      I’m still not sure if my phone can read them.

      • kinnath

        Download an application.

      • UnCivilServant

        That sounds too much like work. Who would do that?

      • Mojeaux

        I just assume everyone has a QR/barcode reader on their phone.

      • Agent Cooper

        New phones can read them just with the regular camera app.

      • Mojeaux

        My phone is a Galaxy S7 and I love it. It’s going to really piss me off when I am forced into a new phone.

  19. egould310

    Fucking conference calls. Just finished one. Need a drink.

    • Hyperion

      Beer o’clock has arrived in these here parts.

  20. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Tard Tuesday: Dementia Man Will Save Us

    The world lost its leader at the worst possible time, The American president.

    When Obama was president and other presidents before him, they were the leaders of the world. People around the world loved Obama. They respected him and they listened to him. I have no doubt things would be so much better right now if Obama was president. Obama would have rallied the entire world against the virus.

    The world lacks that type of leader at this very dangerous moment in history. Trump is not a leader, the world does not respect him, they hate him.

    Hopefully, we, the world can hold things together until the leader of the world returns, the American president. I have no doubt Joe Biden can lead. I have no doubt he will rally the world together to fight the virus.

    • Translucent Chum

      Obama would have rallied the entire world against the virus.

      Ladies and gentlemen, I give you your moron.

    • Winston

      TOP MEN!

    • Count Potato

      “I have no doubt Joe Biden can lead.”

      Only if he can remember he’s President.

    • Rhywun

      LOLOLOL that was a good laugh

    • leon

      The world lost its leader at the worst possible time, The American president.

      Just gonna put this out there, but the American president really only has claim to be the “American” leader. And very arguably the duty to only represent the American People.

      People around the world loved Obama.

      As long as they weren’t holding a wedding in the Middle East.

      Trump is not a leader, the world does not respect him, they hate him.

      No, see Trump is not your leader. You don’t like him, but that doesn’t mean no one likes him, and vice versa with Obama.

      • Mad Scientist

        How can you say that? Have you even seen the creases in Obama’s pants!? That mean was a leader!

      • Rhywun

        1 tingle

      • Rhywun

        wut

        WP swallowed my plus sign

      • juris imprudent

        No it was just clearing up that there was only one tingle, and you don’t get an extra one shit-lord.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      People around the world loved Obama. They respected him and they listened to him.

      Well, not Israel. Not current England. I’m guessing very few people in Asia.

      I imagine virtually no one in South America or Africa knows or cares about the president of the United States. Maybe Venezuelan dictators.

      So, in Obama’s “World Corner”, that leaves socialist countries in Europe and Middle East countries whose residents don’t understand why raping 10 year old boys in swimming pools is wrong. Sounds like a real winning coalition.

      • JaimeRoberto Delecto

        Heck, when I was in his home state of Keny…, er Hawaii, even people there were fed up with him and the inconvenience his visits caused.

  21. westernsloper

    See, Planned Parenthood does do healthcare.

    • Count Potato

      So you are saying HM is going to die?

    • Pope Jimbo

      They are fear mongering. They want everyone to be scared of that ass sex so that the revenue from their abortion mills doesn’t dry up.

  22. Gustave Lytton

    I would like to implant an agonizer into every member of MS’ Windows UI team controlled by a button next to my laptop. Stupid auto hide isn’t working so it sits there covering up the bottom bar of open applications.

    • Unreconstructed

      That was needed after the picture in the article!

    • DEG

      #31 – I miss the TIlted Kilt.

    • prolefeed

      One.

      Also, 24.

    • JaimeRoberto Delecto

      Oh my.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Chris Cilizza DESTROYS Dan Patrick!

    Patrick’s dismissal of “science” appears entirely based on the fact that projections about how many people will die have been all over the map. But projections are just that — attempts to project the future of a very uncertain set of circumstances. Any model that produces a projection like the ones Patrick is dismissing rely on a series of data and assumptions. So yes, if NO social distancing measures had been put in place, it is possible several million Americans could have died. And now that most states have adhered to stay-at-home and social distancing measures, those numbers are much lower. Projections changing is, well, what good projections do when the underlying data and assumptions change.
    As for the actual “science” here, Patrick is dead wrong about it. The science has been pretty damn accurate actually. Doctors have made clear for months that Covid-19 posed a unique threat because of its high level of transmissibility, the possibility of asymptomatic transmission, no herd immunity and the lack of a vaccine or even an effective treatment. All of which is still true.

    ——-

    Patrick seems not to grasp the difference between necessary and unnecessary risks. It is absolutely true that every time you get behind the wheel of a car or fly on an airplane, there is a risk of dying. But you accept that risk as minimal and necessary because you a) use your car to get to work or b) want to see parts of the world that only a plane can get you to. So you take what you believe to be a necessary risk.

    That’s very different than what Patrick is advocating for here. Reopening the country — given what we know about the deadly effects of coronavirus — is an unnecessary risk. Coronavirus is now the leading cause of death in the country. It has infected more than three-quarters of a million people and killed 41,000 as of Tuesday morning.

    Umm, wut?

    “It is possible several million Americans could have died.” Pigeon superstition, FTW!

    • Brochettaward

      The models had social distancing measures baked into them. It’s amazing how blatantly they fucking lie. The models were obviously, painfully fucking wrong from the start to anyone who actually thought about it.

      That’s very different than what Patrick is advocating for here.

      People accept the risk of driving because they have to get to work. How is that different than accepting the risk of getting sick to go to work?

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        It’s different because it empowers and emboldens the state. All for the state, nothing outside the state.

    • The Other Kevin

      Driving in a car is a necessary risk. Flying in an airplane is a necessary risk. But going to a job where you earn money to pay for food, shelter, and clothing is an unnecessary risk. Huh.

    • Ted S.

      It’s also possible that I could buy one ticket and win the lottery.

      And no, Hyperbole, I don’t want to hear your tedious arguing that the writer is somehow just being nuanced,

    • grrizzly

      Our society in general doesn’t understand what science is. This is true even for those smarter than journalists. You need people who are not scientists to understand the scientific method and falsifiability. Those people, even if they exist, have next to no influence on the public debate. And, of course, scientists themselves face incentives that don’t necessarily lead to the same outcome that the (imaginary enlightened) society would expect from science.

      • RAHeinlein

        ^This.

        Also, genuine science should invite discourse and debate. I’m terrified by the “this is what the ‘science’ says so shut up” attitude by those heralded as great minds.

      • westernsloper

        What scares this uneducated rube is the weight given to models. Depending on what data is chosen to make a model you can get whatever result you want. When did “models” become science? Best guesses used to be called hypotheses and stayed that way until proven.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I’d settle for people simply weighing the accuracy of previous models when looking at a new model.

        How in the world, did Ferguson’s dire predictions get so much traction this time around when his previous models had an unblemished streak of never being right?

      • Viking1865

        If one was of a conspiratorial bent, one could argue the media and the bureaucrats thought it was a great way to overthrow Orange Man Bad.

      • R C Dean

        Or, if one heard their eager pronouncements that this could be Trump’s Katrina moment. They were quite open about their desire to use the ‘Rona against Trump.

        Just as Putin had to be surprised out of his socks at how successful is little oppo research disruption campaign turned out to be, I expect the Dem Op types are surprised out of their socks at how successfully they panicked the country and blew up the economy. Its what they wanted, but I doubt any of them thought they would be this successful.

        Of course, the payoff isn’t yet in hand. They still need Trump to lose this fall. But they have made strides, no question.

      • juris imprudent

        This is true even for those smarter than journalists.

        Not sure you could set the bar much lower.

  24. The Hyperbole

    Also, where does one get a cheap logo designed?

    It’s short notice but here you go.

    • westernsloper

      ?

    • Q Continuum

      *opera clap*

    • Brett L

      Well that is definitely my new Glibs logo when I get back to the computer. Thanks!

      • The Hyperbole

        If you’re actually going to use it – here – I tweaked it a bit, I think it reads better.

      • Mojeaux

        Okay, that’s funny.

    • Grumbletarian

      Brilliant!

    • Mad Scientist

      Can we get that printed in a 16 by 8 foot vinyl wrap for Brett’s garage door?

    • Jarflax

      That is really good!

  25. The Late P Brooks

    Download an application.

    I’ll jump right on that, Boris.

  26. The Other Kevin

    You’d think someone in charge of that tip line would remember the “Boaty McBoatface” incident. Especially now that people have a lot more time on their hands.

    • UnCivilServant

      I’m disappointed that the stodgy researchers didn’t just accept the results.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Hopefully, we, the world can hold things together until the leader of the world returns, the American president. I have no doubt Joe Biden can lead. I have no doubt he will rally the world together to fight the virus

    WHEEEEEEEEEE!

  28. Pope Jimbo

    Back in my old startup days, we used to use 99 Designs to come up with logos or web site color palettes.

    Basically you write up a brief on what you want and what your budget is. Then a bunch of graphic designers throw out their entry. You pick the winner and pay them. If you don’t need a Fortune 500 level type logo, it works pretty good.

    We used to work with a polack we found on there. He’d do all sorts of work for super cheap.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I have a good friend who’s wife hates 99 Designs. She worked her ass off for years as a graphic designer. She finally became a partner and now there are several sites like 99 Designs that lets peon designers get jobs without having to slave away at an agency.

  29. Translucent Chum

    MIchigan COVID-19 contact tracing project to use Democrat-connected software firm

    But the state announced Monday the voter/individual contact platform Every Action VAN had been selected to help track information and contacts and organize phone banking related to coronavirus research and response. EveryAction is contracted with the state through a third party called Great Lakes Community Engagement, which specializes in political outreach campaigns.

    Looks like they’ll have their dead voter rolls up to date.

    • Translucent Chum

      NGP VAN bills itself as the “leading technology provider to Democratic and progressive campaigns and organizations.” It has provided campaign services to several state and national Democratic candidates, including Gov. Gretchen Whitmer’s 2018 campaign, according to state records.

      According to its website, EveryAction has offered organizing and fundraising tools to nonprofits such as Rock the Vote, Autism Society, Greenpeace, United Nations Foundation and Planned Parenthood.

    • The Other Kevin

      Come on now, I’m sure it will work every bit as well as the app they used for their primaries.

    • Translucent Chum

      And it’s gone…

      I guess you can tell when someone hand their hand in the cookie jar.

      The contract should have been approved by the State Emergency Operations Center, but was not, said Tiffany Brown, a spokeswoman for Democratic Gov. Gretchen Whitmer.

      “The state is committed to ensuring this important tracing work can begin quickly to help save lives, while also ensuring that public health data is safe and secure,” Brown said in a Tuesday afternoon email.

  30. Stillhunter

    And my 4 year old showed me a cool roller coaster he had created all by himself on Minecraft.

    My 11 year old was tasked with making a Rube Goldberg contraption today. While it was not on the same plane as Doc Brown (it included an egg landing in a frying pan) I was indeed impressed. If I knew how to post a video, I would.

  31. Winston

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theatlantic.com/amp/article/306393/

    Koch rid Germany of typhoid fever by penning up the population of whole villages and condemning whole watersheds. It was ruthless, it was unpopular, it broke down and made a mock of a host of ‘inalienable’ rights—but it worked.

  32. DEG

    Mayor Bill de Blasio’s critics let him know how they really felt about him ordering New Yorkers to snitch on each other for violating social-distancing rules — by flooding his new tip line with crank complaints including “dick pics” and people flipping the bird, The Post has learned.

    Beautiful.

    In Harvard Magazine’s May-June issue, Elizabeth Bartholet, a law professor and faculty director of the school’s Child Advocacy Program, worried homeschooled children will not be able to contribute to a democratic society.

    Elizabeth Bartholet, go fuck yourself.

    Markus Söder, Bavaria’s minister president, and Dieter Reiter, Munich’s lord mayor, announced the news together Tuesday, citing the coronavirus pandemic as the reason for the cancellation.

    “It hurts, it’s such a pity,” Söder said, as noted in comments shared on the Oktoberfest website from the news conference. “We have agreed that the risk is simply too high.”

    NNNOOOOOO!!!!!!!

  33. Semi-Spartan Dad

    “The issue is, do we think that parents should have 24/7, essentially authoritarian control over their children from ages zero to 18?” Bartholet asked. “I think that’s dangerous. I think it’s always dangerous to put powerful people in charge of the powerless, and to give the powerful ones total authority.”

    Persecution of homeschooling through CPS is one of my largest concerns. It happens now regularly, but they’ll gleefully seize children as a matter of routine policy if someone like this ever gains power.

    As my family starts preparations to flee VA over the next few years, favorable homeschool laws are number 2 on our must-have list right after favorable firearm laws. Surprisingly, that knocked out both South Carolina and Tennessee, which apparently have some of the most draconian anti-homeschooling laws in the nation. Who would have thought? Alabama and Georgia both look favorable, though I’m concerned Georgia is turning purple on an inevitable march towards blue.

    Michael Donnelly, director of global outreach and senior counsel for the Home School Legal Defense Association (HSLDA), of which is targeted in the article, told Fox News the views expressed are “extreme.”

    Can’t say enough good about this organization. We have a lifetime membership. They are Christian-based but welcome everyone which is good for (((us))).

    • RAHeinlein

      Please be sure to check the specifics of homeschooling laws before ruling-out states. Iowa’s rating was extremely poor, but they had a funded home-school assistance program that eliminated any need for additional oversight, maintained paperwork/documentation, facilitated some classes/activities, etc.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Right, that’s a good point. Ratings can be a good general guide but always should read the actual laws or at least a summary.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Look, if you allow families to teach their kids at home in TN, your teenage pregnancy rates are gonna sky rocket.

    • l0b0t

      New York has absolutely shockingly good homeschooling laws. Home schooling is constitutionally protected at the State level and local (read NYC) boards of education have no say whatsoever in the choice to pull to your kid from their clutches and the curriculum you implement. We suck ass on firearms though.

    • Hyperion

      Can we also deport them? I mean wouldn’t they be even more famous if they were the first inhabitants of Pluto?

  34. The Late P Brooks

    Tipping point?

    The Justice Department will consider taking legal action against governors who continue to impose stringent rules for dealing with the coronavirus that infringe on constitutional rights even after the crisis subsides in their states, Attorney General William Barr said.

    ——-

    One way the Justice Department might act against state or local officials is by joining lawsuits brought by citizens or businesses over restrictions, Barr said. He acknowledged that state governments are at “a sensitive stage,” as they try to balance health and safety against pressure to reopen. But he said that “as lawsuits develop, as specific cases emerge in the states, we’ll take a look at them.”

    “We’re looking carefully at a number of these rules that are being put into place,” Barr said. “And if we think one goes too far, we initially try to jawbone the governors into rolling them back or adjusting them. And if they’re not and people bring lawsuits, we file statement of interest and side with the plaintiffs.”

    ——-

    Alleging “rampant abuses of constitutional rights and civil liberties,” a group led by former Attorney General Ed Meese wrote Barr this week urging him “to undertake immediate review of all the orders that have been issued by the states and local governments across the nation.”

    In Tuesday’s radio interview, Barr said “these are very, very burdensome impingements on liberty. And we adopted them, we have to remember, for the limited purpose of slowing down the spread, that is bending the curve. We didn’t adopt them as the comprehensive way of dealing with this disease.”

    “You can’t just keep on feeding the patient chemotherapy and say well, we’re killing the cancer, because we were getting to the point where we’re killing the patient,” Barr said. “And now is the time that we have to start looking ahead and adjusting to more targeted therapies.”

    I would like nothing more than to see the states lose some Fifth Amendment takings cases.

    I crack myself up.

      • Hyperion

        We probably do actually live in a simulation. Let’s just hope the lead sim developer has a really good sense of humor and is going to punish the fuck out of all the little Hitler wannabes. Sort of like the 2016 election and Brexit, except even better.

    • Drake

      Federal Marshals frog marching a Governor in cuffs… I’ll believe it and cheer when I see it.

      • Hyperion

        Can we at least pilfer them with rotten veggies before they march off the cliff?

      • Pope Jimbo

        Illinois says “been there, done that”

        Oh, you mean for infringing on liberty and not just general corruption.

    • Grumbletarian

      Maybe Trump can use the Defense Production Act to mandate the production of hempen rope and lampposts.

    • R C Dean

      Of course, Barr is implicitly (or not so implicitly) endorsing the notion that a declared emergency cancels the Constitution.

  35. Rebel Scum

    Harvard prof calls homeschooling ‘dangerous,’ says it gives parents ‘authoritarian control’ over kids

    That’s the State’s job, obvs.

    worried homeschooled children will not be able to contribute to a democratic society.

    I think he is worried that they will not be able to contribute to a Democratic society.

  36. Suthenboy

    I cant keep up but I keep ducking in now and then.

    Ozymandias: Regarding your comment on why Liberty cant be imposed on other cultures – My father put it in a nutshell for me recently. In our culture we teach our children to solve their own problems while almost all other cultures teach their children to look to someone else to solve their problems.
    That, I think, is the heart of it. I think he nailed it.

    • kinnath

      In our culture we teach our children to solve their own problems . . .

      Used to. Some parents still do. Most don’t.

      • Fourscore

        Kinnath, did your apple trees recover from the late climate change induced snow a couple weeks ago?

        We’re still cold some mornings and the buds haven’t emerged yet

      • kinnath

        I was out last weekend. Two pear trees that were well into budding out, the leave/petals were yellow and wilting. A handful of apple trees that had started to bud, seem to be budding out green. Still waiting for the other trees to bud.

        We had light frost two of the five nights predicted to go below 25 degrees. We may not have actually dropped that low locally. I have a new weather station that arrived days after the cold snap. It would have been really nice if it showed up a week earlier, and I was able to capture actual low temperatures in the orchard.

      • Mojeaux

        My son gets pissy when he isn’t allowed to solve his own problems.

        Of course, most of his problems are because he fucked up trying to solve something else.

        And his problems involve my equipment.

        My expensive equipment.

        Which I won’t let him fix.

    • Winston

      So The Culture War is important?

      • Suthenboy

        I am not going to sugarcoat it but yes, somewhat.

      • Ozymandias

        I just submitted a two-parter (surprise!) on the subject of culture.

      • Suthenboy

        I am looking forward to that.
        As RC said to me a few days ago – “That is a bottomless pit” – but one well worth diving into.

      • R C Dean

        Looking forward to it, Ozy. It can’t help but be more thoughtful than my foray into how the culture war is already lost and we are doomed, DOOMED, I say.

        Or words to that effect.

    • Ozymandias

      Suthen – that’s pretty succinct and pretty good, IMO. And I will again lay the blame at state-mandated and controlled education. Two centuries (plus) of state indoctrination of the children is finally bearing fruit: majorities of multiple generations no longer believe Freedom and Liberty are worth fighting for, that what we all really need is an authoritarian leader (and Mandarin class) to protect us, provide for us, tell us what is “correct” to do and to think, and shut the wrongthinkers up.

      • juris imprudent

        I commented on the last thread about the two centuries bit. You are wrong on that. It is far more recent.

      • Winston

        So what happened in the post-WWII and 1960s era to make this into a serious problem? And who do you think is behind it? And it happening so recently might even make it worse because it shows how vulnerable we are.

      • juris imprudent

        And who do you think is behind it?

        Oh, has to be a (((they))) huh? Sure, you can go that route if you like, Gramsci and Bezmenov. Except of course we had a completely independent progressive Dewey-based movement on education.

        What changed is we developed a graduate infrastructure of education instead of a practice-based one. And as every newly minted PhD had (and has) to churn out original pedagogic research/dissertations – the shit piled up worse than a sewer full of flushed bath towels.

      • Winston

        Sorry I wasn’t trying to imply Jews were behind it but what sort of political, cultural and social forces are behind this?

      • juris imprudent

        Sorry myself, I was just grabbing for a group to blame, not to accuse you of anti-semitism.

      • R C Dean

        So what happened in the post-WWII and 1960s era to make this into a serious problem?

        The long march through the institutions. Although I think the rot in the educational system probably didn’t really set in until a little later than the ’60s.

      • Ozymandias

        We’ll have to disagree. One of my first articles here was on the history of state-mandated education. It started with the Puritans. The system we have now is largely still the same one that started in the Mass Bay Colony, although it hasn’t been two-centuries of uninterrupted state education, as I noted in the piece I wrote.

        https://www.glibertarians.com/2019/05/a-case-against-public-education/

        “Modern” education certainly didn’t begin with the Puritans, although the vast majority of states that eventually created their own compulsory education did so based upon the original Massachusetts Act of 1647, or upon land grants similar to the “Land Ordinance of 1785” by the federal government that established Ohio into 640 acre parcels, with a set aside for schools. Widespread adoption, however, of compulsory state education had to overcome a number of hurdles, chief among them being the unwillingness of the poor (and most everyone else) to pay the taxes necessary to fund the system.

        …..

        Given these realities, one has to wonder what it took to finally see widespread adoption of the Massachusetts Model: much like every other plank in the platform of Progressivism, it was spurred on by good old-fashioned racism and fear-mongering, of the exact same kind that animated state education in the first place. The attempt by the Puritans to ensure their ‘posterity’ against the Catholic church was adopted by the broader Protestant population of the United States after waves of Irish Catholic immigration in the 1840s. Over a million Irish immigrants came to the United States fleeing the Potato Famine in their homeland. In the decade from 1846 to 1856, roughly 3 million immigrants arrived in the New World. That number represented about 1/8th of the entire U.S. population – and those Catholic immigrants didn’t want their children being taught Protestant theocracy. Private Catholic schools began to pop up in larger numbers via private endowments and other funding mechanisms. The Industrial Revolution also put large numbers of people in cities and factory owners needed compliant workers. It is no coincidence that Horace Mann, considered by many to be the leading figure in the history of compulsory “free” education, when he was appointed head of the Massachusetts State Board of Education in 1837, had offers to supplement his meager state salary from the pocket of industrialist Edmund Dwight, among others.

        The justification used in the 1840’s and thereafter in favor of compulsory education was the ubiquitous “for the children.” Specifically, “assimilation” of immigrant children. The New York streets were beset by gangs of kids who spent much of their free time in mischief and crime. Nor was it a happenstance that the Ku Klux Klan was a vocal supporter of compulsory state education acts into the 1920s that would ensure the “papists” would not change the character of the Nation

        See FN5 for more history: Walker, Billy D. “The Local Property Tax for Public Schools: Some Historical Perspectives.” Journal of Education Finance 9, no. 3 (1984): 265-88. http://www.jstor.org/stable/40703424.

      • Ozymandias

        Juris – I went back and replied to you there, but the TL/DR is I don’t think we disagree in principle. I’m taking the position that having the state control education meant this flaw was baked in from the beginning, but I would agree that public education was still pretty damn good until at least after WW1 and probably into the 30s. No one foresaw post-modernism and the control the commies would get of the institutions. Depends upon how you define the “problem.”

      • juris imprudent

        Well it isn’t as big a disagreement as might be imagined then. I would say that the true state-level control, vice local control is also of more recent vintage; the state originally being limited to setting compulsory attendance and less direct management. It would appear that the California Textbook Commission was a classic Progressive Era impulse, and we’ve been screwed most royally since then.

      • Ozymandias

        I also think your point about the move to “higher” education is spot on. And going to national control of content was really the biggest mistake of all.

      • Winston

        And going to national control of content was really the biggest mistake of all.

        I agree. Once the feds gained a lot of power over the entire school system of course they would want to use it for their own ends.

        And can’t forget the influence of Public School Teachers Unions.

      • Ted S.

        Richard Feynman was on the committee once and wrote about the experiences. I can’t find his writing on the topic, just a synopsis of it.

      • juris imprudent

        One of my favorite stories of bureaucracy and “oversight”.

      • Winston

        I’m taking the position that having the state control education meant this flaw was baked in from the beginning

        I agree with this. The position that “We need state schools to teach Catholics, Southerners, Blacks and Rednecks to be good classical liberals” was heavily predicated on the assumption that the teachers and their government employers would always want classical liberalism.

      • Ozymandias

        Winston, I think you and I are in accord on this, but I can’t disagree with Juris that for a long time the education system functioned pretty well. The other change that really made a huge difference, IMO, was the push for everyone to be HS graduates (i.e. credentialism). It’s why my grandfather could have “Education: 10” on his WW2 induction certificate at the age of 24 and it not be a big deal. His occupation was listed as “roofer” and he would go on to build his own house from scratch. Imagine trying to do that today.

      • Winston

        This does raise the question of what made it work then (assuming it “worked”) and why it does not work now.

      • Ozymandias

        I’ll argue “culture” and we can kibbitz about it in the comments when those articles pop up here.

      • Winston

        You mean giving the state the total control of education resulted in the state using education to make people love the state? 19th Century liberals have a sad.

  37. Hyperion

    Gut Wrenching!

    Awww, isn’t that so sweet. Poor little thing, so gut wrenching. Much woke, many brave. Now say goodbye to your comfy political career, cunte!

    • Drake

      I made you eat shit for your own good.

    • RAHeinlein

      Wow – the entire MSM is shilling hard for her.

    • Suthenboy

      If I ever find myself in Michigan again….unlikely but….I hope I stop at a fast food restaurant and find myself face to face with her and she says “Can I help you sir?”

    • Pope Jimbo

      I tell you she was totes upset that she had to leave some businesses open. Her gut told her to shut everything down. But she had to go against it and leave at least the lottery ticket outlets open.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Gut wrenching my ass.

      She was making a play for the VP slot by being the tough nanny in charge.

      • juris imprudent

        Not sure Joe wants one that feisty, she must break one of his fingers, or his nose.

      • dbleagle

        I will believe she is sorry for needlessly destroying lives when she suck starts a shotgun.

  38. Rebel Scum

    YOU DID THE REICH THING.

    De Commie-o is the wurst.

    • Count Potato

      “YouTube CEO: Anything that goes against the WHO is a violation of YouTube policies

      In her first interview since the coronavirus lockdown started in the US, YouTube CEO Susan Wojcicki discussed how the platform has responded to the pandemic by removing thousands of videos and sending over 10 billion views to legacy media outlets.

      Wojcicki made the comments during an appearance on CNN reporter Brian Stelter’s Reliable Sources podcast where she mostly focused on the platform’s efforts to give people the “right information” and stamp out “misinformation.”

      “We also talk about removing information that is problematic,” Wojcicki said. “We’ve had to update our policy numerous times associated with COVID-19.”

      Wojcicki then went on to give examples of content that would be a violation of YouTube’s policies, including anything “that is medically unsubstantiated, so people saying like, ‘take vitamin C, take turmeric, like those are/or will cure you.’ Those are the examples of things that would be a violation of our policy.”

      When it comes to determining what YouTube classes as “misinformation,” Wojcicki said that “anything that would go against World Health Organization [WHO] recommendations would be a violation of our policy” – the same WHO that amplified China’s propaganda about there being “no evidence of human-to-human transmission” of the coronavirus and criticized Taiwan after a Chinese propaganda campaign on Twitter.

      And when it comes to the sources of “right information,” Wojcicki has chosen “authoritative sources” (legacy media outlets) and public health organizations – many of which were downplaying the severity of the coronavirus and telling the public masks are not effective as recently as late March, only to change their rhetoric in April to position the coronavirus as a much more serious threat and recommend wearing masks.”

      https://reclaimthenet.org/youtube-ceo-coronavirus-right-information-misinformation/

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Spineless twat

      • Tulip

        So no Gwyneth Paltrow on You-Tube, right?

      • Fourscore

        They will all migrate over to here. Its a Lib Moment, to be seized! Wait ’til Friday Night Follies and there are hundreds lined up to have their voices heard, like the line up that captivated DEG a couple days ago.

      • DEG

        like the line up that captivated DEG a couple days ago.

        That could be any of Q’s Chive links.

      • Lady Z

        Must silence the heretics.

      • Shirley Knott

        Everybody’s somebody’s heretic.

  39. Winston

    https://www.aier.org/article/innovation-and-the-trouble-with-the-precautionary-principle/

    Elhanan Helpman defines as “systems of rules, beliefs, and organizations,” including the rule of law and court systems, property rights, contracts, free trade policies and institutions, light-touch regulations and regulatory regimes, freedom to travel, and various other incentives to invest.

    I don’t know, I never was too fond of this sort of thinking. We need Innovation, Dynamism and Progress which will of course result in political policies I like despite how all the Innovation, Dynamism and Progress we have had so far has led to policies I don’t like.

    The openness Juma had in mind represents a tolerance of new ideas, inventions, and unknown futures. It can and should also represent an openness to new, more flexible methods of governance

    And we need Modern, New Ideas which are of course will always be ideas I support. I mean the Coronavirus lockdowns are Modern New Ideas that represents new forms of governance and an unknown future and those are good, right?

    • Suthenboy

      “…the Coronavirus lockdowns are modern New Ideas that represents new forms of governance and an unknown future…”

      Unknown to whom? I could have given you a 100% accurate play by play a year ago.

  40. The Late P Brooks

    Wow – the entire MSM is shilling hard for her. [Whitmer]

    Meanwhile, they treat the governor of South Dakota as if she’s a brainwashed member of some sort of Trump death cult.

    • Suthenboy

      Remember when we used to joke about turning the country into a giant totalitarian prison so that there would be no crime?

      I remember. Good times.

    • RAHeinlein

      Let’s compare records:

      SD – 8 deaths, 100 ever hospitalized (65 current). MI – third in nation for total deaths (fifth per 1 MM population).

      • Pope Jimbo

        But it would have been sooooooo much worse if she hadn’t locked people up!

        That is what every asswipe will respond with if you bring that point up.

      • AlmightyJB

        One is reinforcing the narrative of the black death, the other is a Nazi. SD shouldn’t be allowed to report their numbers!

      • B.P.

        SD = sicherheitsdienst

        Nazi confirmed.

      • Suthenboy

        Without giving numbers I saw an MSM report a couple of days ago that characterized SD as a HOT SPOT.

      • RAHeinlein

        The myth of using “cases” as a metric, plus those dumb asses at Smithfield.

    • AlmightyJB

      Well SD is up to 8 whole deaths now! It’s just like Holocaust!

    • Oy the Billy-Bumbler

      The recall petition for her is up to 303,000 signatures.

      • Oy the Billy-Bumbler

        Whitmer that is

  41. Winston

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women%27s_suffrage

    Speaking of Innovation, Progress and New Ideas I do find it interesting that Lenin, Hitler and Mao came to power shortly AFTER their countries adopted Female Suffrage. I mean how could such progressive countries become totalitarian? And North Korea did not have female suffrage before the Kims, so how can they be all that bad?

    • Winston

      To clarify my point: In the 19th Century and early 20th Century the notion that countries that gave women the vote could be totalitarian shitholes seemed impossible since female suffrage was such a progressive idea back then. Except we later saw how very possible that was…

    • Suthenboy

      ‘Karen’ is a woman’s name. That name wasn’t chosen for no reason.

    • Winston

      Or if you told Someone in 1914 that in a few years Russia will abolish the Monarchy, give women the right to vote and have the government be responsible to the elected legislature yet be a totalitarian shithole that would sound ludicrous yet in a few years that is in fact what happened.

  42. Pope Jimbo

    So we have been having weekly meetings via Zoom for the entire IT group. The meeting is basically our head honcho telling us that things are fine. This week he sent out a link to a survey where us IT drones could make suggestions on how working at home could be better.

    Instantly a lot of people started whining about how they didn’t have big fancy monitors at home or an ergonomic keyboard. Or anything.

    Now I’m pretty sure we will come out about even this year revenue wise and shouldn’t need to do anything draconian, but I was astonished that people would still feel free enough to bitch and moan. If I was our honcho, I would have been taking notes, just in case a few layoffs were needed.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      As a manager, it’s always better when the employees make your firing decisions easier in a downturn.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Another more experienced developer and I were IM-ing each other during the meeting. Our theory is that the whiners weren’t around for the Dot Com Crash and have only known the good times. They’ve never been through a down turn and all the claw backs from HR that go on.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Probably true. I remember the tech implosion well.

    • Brett L

      A good craftsman has the right tools for the job, whether he pays or his employer pays for them. Had an interview with a high up technical guy at one of the biiig IT consulting firms. We were talking about that today. We both own resharper for C# because it pays for itself. Neither of us expense it.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yup. I own several licenses for tools I really like. Same with books and other training stuff.

      • Rhywun

        Same. I always marvel at coworkers who plod along with only the tools they are given

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Because they don’t have drive.

        A good engineer always has his own set of resources and tools. Always.

      • Rhywun

        *sigh* WP swallowed my comment again

        “and can’t be bothered to look for better tools.”

    • CPRM

      It’s the companies fault that they didn’t get themselves computers they liked?

      • Viking1865

        Yeah what kind of IT guy doesn’t have a dual monitor set up, at the very least?

      • UnCivilServant

        Well, back when I had a higher debt burden, I only had one monitor at home…

        …per computer

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      Instantly a lot of people started whining about how they didn’t have big fancy monitors at home or an ergonomic keyboard. Or anything.

      My standard line at any of these “mental health check-in” meetings is “things are going well enough, I’m a little bit stir crazy, but everything is going fine”

      No need to give my boss ammo for laying me off

  43. The Late P Brooks

    Toldja so!

    A malaria drug widely touted by President Donald Trump for treating the new coronavirus showed no benefit in a large analysis of its use in U.S. veterans hospitals. There were more deaths among those given hydroxychloroquine versus standard care, researchers reported.

    The nationwide study was not a rigorous experiment. But with 368 patients, it’s the largest look so far of hydroxychloroquine with or without the antibiotic azithromycin for COVID-19, which has killed more than 171,000 people as of Tuesday.

    The study was posted on an online site for researchers and has not been reviewed by other scientists. Grants from the National Institutes of Health and the University of Virginia paid for the work.

    ——-

    Researchers did not track side effects, but noted a hint that hydroxychloroquine might have damaged other organs. The drug has long been known to have potentially serious side effects, including altering the heartbeat in a way that could lead to sudden death.

    Take that, President Cartoon Villain!

    • Pope Jimbo

      not a rigorous experiment

      So they gave some sickly old vet a dose of the hydroxychloroquine just before they pushed him off the VA Center’s roof. The control group was not pushed off the roof.

      But by the time any real docs weigh in on the “study” the MSM will have had a week to push the narrative that Trump’s claims have been totes debunked. Sort of like the Ukraine story. Totes debunked, but never a link to the actual debunking.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Yeah, I wonder how bad off those people were before they gave it out. I still intend to insist on it if I get sick.

      • R C Dean

        Oh, so now “observational studies” are the tits?

        Why, barely a week ago they were obviously invalid and should be ignored.

        The odds are quite high that the docs gave it to the very sickest. This is often done with “experimental” drugs.

        Also often done with experimental drugs given to no-hoper patients: high doses. The kind that lead to side effects like busted tickers.

    • Suthenboy

      “The nationwide study was not a rigorous experiment.”

      “The study was posted on an online site for researchers and has not been reviewed by other scientists.”

      – It doesn’t matter how many people we have to kill to get rid of BadOrangeMan-

    • RAHeinlein

      A Brazil study with high doses showed the same.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Stopped because of heart rhythm issues which is a known problem with high doses of the drug.

  44. Tundra

    Hi Brett!

    Magnum PI is television perfection. Several years ago when it hit Netflix, my son and were regular viewers. One night my daughter sat down to watch for a little while.

    Quote: “OMG why is he wearing those shorts? And why is he so hairy?!?” I think today she’d understand…

    Get some cards. I give out maybe 10 a year, but they cost nothing.

    Best of luck with the new venture. I hope you knock it out of the park!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Magnum PI was alright but he ain’t no Jim Rockford.

      • Grumbletarian

        Having a Ferrari in Hawaii seems like a waste. Is there a road there that goes more than 100 feet without bending?

      • Tundra

        Huh?

        Bendy roads are like bendy girls, dude.

    • Invisible BEAM of the comment stream

      I even have cards for personal contact, sort of like the old-fashioned “calling cards” of the 19th and early 20th Centuries. Saves a lot of time when I have to interact with people who want/need my info. I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how many times they’ve come in handy.

      And if you wait for specials on Vistaprint, you can get 500 of ’em for well under 20 bucks, delivered to your door.

    • Mad Scientist

      My wife used to work with Tom’s niece. She would constantly give him shit about pulling his jeans up too high and other fashion faux pas. He didn’t seem to care. And that right there is a big part of his appeal.

  45. Stinky Wizzleteats

    *checks calendar*

    OK, it’s April…Octoberfest is still in October right? Seems like they could have waited a bit to see how things go before they canceled it.

    • Rhywun

      They probably saw the writing on the wall.

      Get comfortable, folks. We’re not going anywhere.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Someone called it that if it goes beyond Memorial Day it might get ugly. I can see that.

        We are not a bound species and even in a fiefdom yiu could enjoy the lily fields before your flogging

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Apply and take the money.

        Stick it in the bank because odds are your going to need it before this is over. And by “this” I’m not just referring to the virus, but to the broader credit market implosion that’s underway.

      • Mojeaux

        ^^^ That, a million times that. Not only take the money, take it OUT of the bank and stash the cash.

  46. DEG

    Sununu announces “reopening task force”, plus fucked models

    Gov. Chris Sununu said Tuesday that New Hampshire will take a phased approach to reopening after the COVID-19 crisis begins to subside.

    Sununu announced he was forming a task force to determine how best to reopen businesses and institutions once the danger of spreading the coronavirus lessens. He noted there is no timeline for reopening businesses, and the virus is still spreading in the New Hampshire community.

    Later in the article:

    Forty-four new COVID-19 cases were reported Tuesday, said Dr. Benjamin Chan, the state’s epidemiologist. Tuesday was the first day in a week in which no new deaths linked to the virus were reported.

    I saved this Union Leader article:

    Eleven people in New Hampshire likely will die from COVID-19 on April 21, the peak day for such deaths in the state, according to projections released this week by a university-affiliated research center.

    There’s a big difference between 0 and 11. GIGO.

  47. KSuellington

    Speaking of Tom Selleck, every Magnum PI episode is currently on Amazon Prime. We have gone through the first two seasons. What a great show, it stands the test of time.

    • Suthenboy

      Wife has been watching ‘Frazier’ re-runs.
      I realize that I failed to appreciate it when it ran the first time. The whole show is a stand-up routine, one joke after another.
      From today’s show:
      Q: ” Doesn’t everybody’s family drive them nuts? ”
      A: ” Mine certainly would if I still spoke to any of them.”

      • Ownbestenemy

        Love Fraizer. Niles is the best behind dad.

      • Suthenboy

        It takes a pretty heavy dose of suspension of disbelief to buy that Niles fell for Daphney. But hey, whatever.
        The guy is a comic genius but C’mon….girls are not his thing.

        As for Jane Leeves…cutestest girl next door ever….she did not age well.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Oh exactly on both accounts. Still a fun show to watch and ended I think a show should end though maybe a season too long.

        Wife loves that show.

        Right now we are rewatching Community which again…a season too long but they poke fun at that.

      • Bill Door

        We are finally in season 6 of Community. It had to happen. Season 6 is definitely beyond its prime, but Community is one of my all time favorite shows, nonetheless.

        Frazier is another gem. We got into it a couple of years ago on Netflix and have watched it all a couple of times since.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I was hoping they would have done the cliche thing and had all the season a figment of Abeds mind…but I am no show writer

      • Bill Door

        It would have been cliched, but they could have pulled it off. Almost like the AbedTV bit from season 4.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, it was a pretty good show. Better than Cheers.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Kelsey Grammer is pretty underrated in my opinion.

      • Tundra

        Agreed. I enjoyed that show a lot.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Boss was good, if depressing.

      • AlmightyJB

        I liked Frazier a lot but not better than Cheers IMHO.

  48. RAHeinlein

    In-case some Glibs are looking to get-in on the next round, looks like next round of PPP will pass tomorrow per Mnuchin.

    • Ownbestenemy

      All my family is saying get it for the wife business but we don’t need it.

      *adjusts tin foil hat* I am sure there is going to be some strings attached that will start to come out in the months ahead once the legislation is actually read.

      • R C Dean

        I’ve read it. The strings are pretty minimal. You get a loan to cover two months of payroll/benefits/employer-side payroll taxes. You can even get a 25% add-on for things like mortgages and utilities.

        Don’t fire anybody, don’t cut their pay, and after two months you can apply to have it forgiven.

  49. Ownbestenemy

    So the Review Journal used to be paywalled…then the virus happened and they opened up their website to all.

    Now they are going back to paywall. I think they know this has dragged on too long.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Local city hasn’t enforced parking meters as far as I can tell since it started. I would imagine they’re going to be compelled to restart that soon.

  50. The Late P Brooks

    The myth of using “cases” as a metric, plus those dumb asses at Smithfield.

    Define “case” plz.

    Also, those Smithfield people need to be studied carefully to see how many people get asympotmatically “infected” but never get sick. I think that number will be a lot higher than zero.

    • The Hyperbole

      They should have sent in pictures of drugs falling out of their asses.

      • Chafed

        Sadly, I just realized you are right.

      • The Hyperbole

        That’s gotta sting.

      • R C Dean

        Chafed, if you can’t reach the shotgun trigger with the barrel in your mouth, try using a wire hanger.

    • Suthenboy

      Also the city were Bloomturd asked people on the street if they thought it was a good idea to outlaw sodas and got an overwhelming ‘yes’.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Why I Like My Job: I told my boss (the company president) about this story and he almost had a rupture from laughing so hard.

  51. creech

    Other than the ChiComflu news, the local tv has started in with endless reports on the NFL draft. Finally it appears the news about Joe Altobelli, his wife and daughter and six other people dying in an L.A. helicopter crash have run their course, and we are now to endure endless weeks about whom our local team may pick, why the eventual picks are good or bad, and more speculation about whether the major rival team has improved vis a vis the locals. It might be refreshing to see a few stories about a new Royal Twit pregnancy, or Michelle as veep speculation, or even which LP nutjob thinks he (or she) and win in 2020 if the cards are right.

    • westernsloper

      Given that free ponies of all stripes are up for grabs now I am going with Vermin Supreme.

      • Trigger Hippie

        His trigger discipline is excellent. Got my vote.

  52. prolefeed

    Why trusting the MSM makes one out of touch with the truth, part 13, 780:

    Texas Lt. Gov. literally says, “Every life is valuable,” then adds a sentence noting the tradeoff between 500 dying versus 29 million locked down or out of work.

    Democratic minority leader characterizes this as Lt. Gov. wants people to die so “rich people’s stock portfolios” can grow.

    MSM repeats the lie and characterizes those who want to open up the economy as “hard line conservatives.”

    Wife scans headline and says the Texas AG said he was OK with people dying.

    • Suthenboy

      The two things people hate above all else: Truth and responsibility.

      I think I said this before; one of wife’s friends openly admitted she makes all of her decisions based on her emotions. She said that with a straight face.

      Her life is a 60 year long train wreck.

    • Winston

      I am still surprised that I live in a world when the MSM is mad that Republicans aren’t authoritarian enough.

  53. AlmightyJB

    I don’t know how people can go to CNN.com everyday. It’s like everyday is
    doom and gloom, you might as well just kill yourself now and get it over with headlines. Sad.

  54. mikey

    “This made me tear up a bit..”
    Don’t remember who but a Glib called this when it was first announced.

  55. B.P.

    A coworker sent me a thing from instagram wherein a witty soul exposes the irony that the type of folk who have prepped all their lives (stocking weapons and canned goods, etc.) have finally gotten their shelter-in-place emergency, but these knuckledraggers are the same people who are laying siege to state capitols in their “Walmart tactical” because they aren’t allowed to go to Cheesecake Factory.

    It’s become a popular idea that people are protesting for being subject to minor inconveniences, rather than taking action because their lives’ work has been taken from them, or governments have massively overstepped constitutional restrictions.

    Also, attention unhinged hillbillies: you were crazy then and are crazy now. Furthermore, your taste in retail and restaurants is declasse.

    • The Hyperbole

      Furthermore, your taste in retail and restaurants is declasse

      It’s déclassé, hick.

      • B.P.

        Guilty.

        I have no idea where the accent aigu key is.

    • Winston

      Furthermore, your taste in retail and restaurants is declasse.

      I’ve always been very amused by this. We are so tolerant, pluralistic and non-judgmental but if you literally do anything different from us then you are subhuman scum.

    • Rhywun

      The whole thing is just an offshoot of the culture war.

      • Rhywun

        Exactly. Protester Karen is an uneducated waitress or shop girl. Unessential. Obsolete.

      • kbolino

        If you are wearing scrubs outside of a medical facility, you’re defeating the purpose of the garment. Ditto lab coats outside of laboratories and camouflage uniforms outside of combat areas.

    • LemonGrenade

      One of my coworkers posted something similar in our “there are no hr violations” channel. I promptly replied with, “i think it’s really fucking hilarious that a bunch of people who formerly believed in the first amendment think it’s perfectly fine to kill freedom of assembly and association because the trump administration told them to. maybe they’ll change their tune when it doesn’t matter if the governor graciously deigned to deem their business essential, but it went under anyway, because everyone else is fucking unemployed.” So sick of people whose jobs have been entirely unaffected by this acting like people upset the government ordered them out of business are being childish.

      • B.P.

        Spoiler: Their commitment to the first amendment was surficial, or not thought through. Once their principles were tested, it was time to throw them overboard.

      • Mojeaux

        What principles?

      • B.P.

        Well, there’s that. I was going to put it in quotation marks.

      • LemonGrenade

        Yes, the number of people who have come out in favor of government lockdowns (curiously, all either ‘essential employees’ or otherwise still with jobs) has been the most disappointing thing about this entire experience. I knew my governor was a terrible authoritarian. I had *no idea* so many other people saw that as a plus until now.

      • kbolino

        A lot of people seem to think the government will take care of them. They haven’t quite figured out how, yet, but any day now they’ll figure it out. Until then, they’ll Just keep ignoring that the new unemployment numbers >> the number of SARS-CoV-2 cases >> the number of COVID-19 deaths.

  56. Mojeaux

    Barfday present #1 and present #2. Present #3, which is a set of hard-to-find calligraphy nibs, is still on its way because apparently it’s not an ESSENTIAL good.

    • westernsloper

      Happy Bday Mo. (I missed that earlier) Although I am not sure you should trust your family since they didn’t get you face masks and chlorox wipes in these trying times.

    • Trigger Hippie

      Oh, shit. Happy Bday!

      • Mojeaux

        “Oh shit” is absolutely right when the age starts with a “5”.

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        Happy B day! Mo, 50’s are alright, kind of….

      • Suthenboy

        Relax. The whole point of this debacle is to stick around as long as possible. The goal is to end up in a rocker on the porch, toothless, grey and wrinkled with lots of scars, laughing at the yunguns who are still trying to figure out what the hell is going on around here.

      • Old Man With Candy

        I have underwear older than you are.

      • Ozymandias

        And I’d been meaning to mention that you should probably change those…

      • Mojeaux

        This is strangely comforting.

      • R C Dean

        Not to worry, Moje.

        Soon the age will start with a “6”.

      • Mojeaux

        Also comforting.

        Hoping by then my hair will be completely white (instead of just half-assed white that makes it look dirty) and that I will have a crap-ton of hippie clothes.

    • AlmightyJB

      Happy Birthday! Someone gave you their unwanted Christmas presents?

    • DEG

      Happy birthday!

    • Lady Z

      Happy birthday Mo!

    • Viking1865

      Oh there’s absolutely dudes that can pull that kinda stuff off. My freshman year I lived in a coed dorm. There was a dude who lived down the hall who was kinda greasy looking. He wasn’t short, but he wasn’t tall. Cokehead kinda skinny. Dressed like a hobo who had raided an 80s time capsule. He was funny and charming, but not amazingly so. But what he did have was a long, thick, and veiny cock. I know this because he also owned a Polaroid camera, and as the year went on more and more photos went on the wall next to his bed. Photos of girls who’d checked off their “hookup with a guy packing legit pornstar meat” bucket list item, and had no problem posing with the flesh harpoon in their hands, or laying on their face, or in their mouth. Those were just the ones who would let him take their picture. It was like early November when his girlfriend from back home came to visit him. We were all hanging out in his room, and she walked in, jumped in his arms, and then noticed the trophy wall. She spins around and says “everyone out, I gotta remind papi who his best girl is.” Story after story about this cat, dude had like the kavorka man thing in spades. Leaving aside the photographic proof wall, I know he was banging both of the female RAs and at least one professor.

      • Ted S.

        The 80s weren’t a time capsule for some of us, bub.

    • Tres Cool

      This is where I knew it was fake:

      My boyfriend invited them in and asked me to give them some privacy.

      An hour later I….

    • DEG

      Surely you’ve heard of the cuckquean fetish?

      • Suthenboy

        I see people debating this subject (adultery) endlessly with all kinds of angles and subtlties.

        My advice: You gave your word. Now keep it.

    • Ted S.

      Nice shirt.

    • Tundra

      “Mom are you gonna be part of the solution here, or the problem?”

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        My Mom would have said, ” Yes I’m the Final Solution” and we knew the reference,
        /Dragon Lady!

  57. Mojeaux

    I really wish I could homeschool, but I know my weaknesses and one of them is that I suck as a teacher. I can put XY in a virtual school and know he’ll probably resign himself to doing the work, especially if he’s bored and it’s something to do. But if they need me to be more hands-on, it would end in tears for all of us.

    As long as Gadsden flags are flying in the classrooms at the high school, I’ll just thank my lucky stars and count down to graduation.

    • Winston

      As long as Gadsden flags are flying in the classrooms at the high school

      Aren’t those flags racist? Then not for very long.

      • Mojeaux

        Four years, Winston. Just four…more…years.

    • Suthenboy

      The essence of teaching is to take a concept the student understands and make an analogy to the concept the student does not understand.

  58. Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

    Adding injury to insult, something popped in my lower back right after the 19th hole, out of 27, played 5 more, and I had to leave, agony, worst back pain I’ve ever felt,

    • DEG

      Sorry. I hope you heal up soon.

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        Thanks D, this is going to mess up my plans for a Business, won’t kill it, just slow it down, I want to go!

    • Mojeaux

      Yeowch, Yusef! Geez, be careful, willya?

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        I’m Solo, I can’t afford to get hurt, if that requires quitting the game, so be it…

  59. LCDR_Fish

    Wiped out. Just got home since I needed to stop for a few more errands on the way home. Eat, pack a bit more, crash by 8:30. yay for beer.

    I know some folks are tired of this link, but it is nice to see how the details are being updated/clarified – http://www.vdh.virginia.gov/coronavirus/

    Also, KDW’s new weekly newsletter essay today was awesome. https://www.nationalreview.com/the-tuesday/the-american-alloy/

    “Beyond parody” is a tedious cliché, but I admit I would find it very difficult to parody this report from Slate on judicial appointments in Washington State.

    “While the federal bench grows more homogeneous by the day, Democratic governors are diversifying their state judiciaries to an unprecedented degree. On Monday, Washington Gov. Jay Inslee, a Democrat, elevated Grace Helen Whitener to the state Supreme Court. Whitener is a disabled black lesbian who immigrated from Trinidad. She joins Inslee’s two other appointees: Raquel Montoya-Lewis, a Jewish Native American who previously served on tribal courts, and Mary Yu, an Asian-American Latina lesbian who officiated the first same-sex marriages in the state.”

    (If you were attempting parody, you’d be tempted to give the name “Whitener” to one of her evil conservative opponents.)

    I have no reason to doubt that each of the jurists above is competent and highly qualified; Justice Whitener is, after all, a graduate of the 122nd-best law school in the country.

    (If you are around my age, you may remember a good deal of organized sneering at Vice President Dan Quayle for his “night-school law degree,” at Sarah Palin for her modest educational attainments, etc. Justice Yu went a more elite route — well done, Notre Dame.)

    Literally can’t make this up.

    • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

      Sweet Virus! Kill us All!
      I identify as an asexual Nerf Ball Treefrog

      • Ozymandias

        You too, Yusef?!

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        That’s how i got CV, Nerfball to Nerfball transmission!

    • Suthenboy

      Huh. So they are for a meritocracy, they just want to change what merit is.

    • juris imprudent

      That’s one of the perversities of American life: The bitterest critics of American culture and American institutions often are those who most dramatically embody the virtues of the American way of life — and, at the same time, some of the most unyielding defenders of the American way are comfortable mediocrities who embody the worst of its shortcomings.

      I always loved the example of Jesse Jackson, who when he wanted to tout his African-ness would do so using 2000 years of Western cultural development, from the basics of rhetoric from the Greeks to the precepts of the Scottish Enlightenment.

      • Suthenboy

        I dont have to tell this crowd, but Americans traveling outside of the US for the first time are often in for a rude awakening.
        We are the least poor, least backward, least racist country in the world and not by just a little bit.

      • Winston

        Is KDW Thomas Carlyle?

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      (If you are around my age, you may remember a good deal of organized sneering at Vice President Dan Quayle for his “night-school law degree,”

      I’m not old enough to remember that, but fuck all of those people

      /somebody who passed up good offers to top tier schools to save money by going to night school

      • Suthenboy

        Remember, VP’s are life insurance policies for Presidents. There is nothing wrong with night school. Dan Quayle on the other hand….
        Potatoe, Putatoh, puh…put…

        *Waits to see who gets the reference

      • Ted S.

        Shall we dance?

        It was the fault of the teachers, who couldn’t spell “potato” correctly on the card they gave Quayle.

      • Suthenboy

        Wow. I never would have guessed you would get that. Your avatar looks like you are my son’s age.

      • Tres Cool

        “follow me around”

        -Gary Hart

      • Fatty Bolger

        Lee Atwater set him up!

        I was living in Miami at the time and I remember it being all over the news.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah and it was a nationwide punchline for years. The media saw to that.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        I was gonna say, Dan Quayle is synonymous with potatoe in this 31 year old’s mind. I know very little else about him.

      • Chipwooder

        Well, let’s be honest here, it’s not as if there weren’t other things he said that made him a punchline…..

        Contributing greatly to the perception of Quayle’s incompetence was his tendency to make public statements that were either impossible (“I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future”[25]), self-contradictory (“‘I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy, but that could change'”[26]), self-contradictory and confused (“The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation’s history. … No, not our nation’s, but in World War II. I mean, we all lived in this century. I didn’t live in this century, but in this century’s history”[27]), or just confused (such as the comments he made in a May 1989 address to the United Negro College Fund. Commenting on the United Negro College Fund’s slogan—which is “a mind is a terrible thing to waste”—Quayle said, “You take the UNCF model that what a waste it is to lose one’s mind or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is”[28][29]).

      • Rhywun

        You could compile a similar list for nearly every public figure. The MSM are very selective about whose lists get repeated ad infinitum.

      • Fatty Bolger

        True. We never would have heard the end of some of Obama’s flubs if he’d been a Republican.

  60. JD is Unemployed

    If only Nerf ammo did reproduce asexually. If only.

    • Suthenboy

      Check the back yard. Look for the extra-green spots in the grass and check those.

      • Yusef sounds like David Lee Roth, ...really?

        They self identify as Legos……
        /ouch!

      • Fatty Bolger

        Most of ours would end up in the rain gutter.

    • Mojeaux

      Do you mind if I put you on my contractor list? It’s not much of one, but I can always use a name to forward to clients.

      • Agent Cooper

        Yes! That would be great. The contact form on the site actually does go to my real email (I wasn’t actually sure.)

      • Mojeaux

        I can do websites and I know what I like, but I just slapped my professional one together. I have to have lots of information on it, I like minimalism, can’t do minimalism when you need lots of information right there in front of your face–

        I really really really love your GoGlorious website.

    • Ozymandias

      The “progility” ad – is that your doing? Because it’s hilarious and brilliant. And I’m not even a surgeon.

  61. Gadfly

    Also, where does one get a cheap logo designed?

    And my 4 year old showed me a cool roller coaster he had created all by himself on Minecraft.

    You could always let the in-house talent have a shot at it.

  62. Chipwooder

    OMWC spitting flames at Robbie Soave…..like bringing a Mk-19 to a gunfight

    Robby Soave
    @robbysoave
    ·
    6h
    It remains a mystery to me why the single most pressing goal of the new religious conservative movement is to maximally alienate libertarians.

    OldManWithCandy
    @OMWithCandy
    ·
    4h
    You might want to find a libertarian and ask him/her.

    • kbolino

      Safe/easy target. Too few to matter, too fractious to fight back.

  63. one true athena

    My son won a contest for an event design and the nonprofit liked it so much they paid him 200 bucks to make it the logo for the company. /proud mom

    if you’d like a teenager to give it a try for you, we can make it happen.