Florida Man MIA Afternoon Links

by | Jul 2, 2020 | Daily Links | 266 comments

Well, we all know that Brett L has some…challenges in his life. I guess today is full of them. Or something. It’s also possible he asked for coverage and nobody stepped up. We’re like that.

So, here’s a quick link for you:

Death Crystals FTW

 

Now, have at it with an Open Post!

About The Author

SP

SP

I've got an idea! How about we just stick to the Constitution as written and then the government can leave me the fuck alone.

266 Comments

  1. Rebel Scum

    First.

    • Rebel Scum

      Sleepy Joe isn’t the only one who is senile.

      “But the violence that we see — whether it’s the toxic places where they (black people) live; the inadequacy of health care for them; whether it’s the lack of affordable housing; the absence of jobs at living wages; all those things – that’s basically going unseen. We see the actual violence because the police is what it is. It’s the last line line of defense for white supremacy. That’s what the police represents. They don’t protect African Americans,” Danny Glover said in an interview with Variety, speaking about the death of George Floyd and the frenzy of protests and hysteria that followed it.

      “You can make an argument that the institutional violence has its roots in so many different ways,” the Predator and The Color Purple star said. “The violence that we see now that is acted out on the physical body of George Floyd has been the kind of violence that is engrained within the American idea of its culture, in its own subtlety, since the first Africans were brought here. So it’s 400 years of violence. It’s not just now!

      So all those years of you playing a cop who was generally on the right side of things…I guess you gotta repent for that.

      • pan fried wylie

        “It’s been revoked!”, classic!

        … Wrong movie? … Whatchutalkinbout Willis?! Huh, another miss there? Damn, uh, Lando?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Those tens of millions of dollars from the Lethal Weapon movies can buy a lot of indulgences.

      • Nephilium

        Except for Lethal Weapon 6 (which has also been pulled).

        He may just be upset that he can’t pull off classy blackface like James Earl Jones.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I just popped over to Hulu and, yup, not there. My rage is untethered and knows no bounds. What a crock of shit, those were two of the best episodes. If these episodes are being yanked with the acquiescence of the cast it’s going to ruin the whole damn show for me.

      • Nephilium

        That got yanked from foreign Netflix a while back. I noticed it was gone from Hulu last Saturday (when both pulled the Community episode that’s had me in a burning rage). There was an interview I read last year where Glen said the one episode he wouldn’t do again was Dee’s Dating a Retard. So I’m not sure if the cast has “evolved” or not.

        And for those pushing physical media, sometimes you can’t even get episodes that way. I’m getting about ready to just going back to pirating it all.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Maybe they’ll come back after this dies down a bit but, yeah, torrents are an option if you’re willing.

      • Nephilium

        /looks over at his 2 TB external drive of TV shows

        I was more making a reference that Showtime and the DVD release have purged the Vatican episode of Bullshit (I’m slightly convinced it’s why the season after that was the last season of Bullshit).

      • Rhywun

        DVD release have purged the Vatican episode of Bullshit

        Wow, that’s shitty.

      • Nephilium

        Rhywun:

        The first DVD release of that season didn’t have the Vatican episode on it. Right now it’s still not even on Hulu.

      • Rhywun

        Damm!t. I should have said “sh!tty”.

        S!gh.

      • Suthenboy

        I have seen interviews with Glover. He is a good actor but when he isn’t pretending to be someone sane he is his own bark- at-the-moon crazy self.

      • C. Anacreon

        He used to live down the street from us in San Francisco, in a big mansion next door to Bobby McFerrin’s mansion. They were clearly suffering a lot of oppression in their multimillion dollar palaces.

      • pan fried wylie

        I dunno. If his one single is any indication, he sounds like he takes it in stride.

      • Chipwooder

        “But the violence that we see — whether it’s the toxic places where they (black people) live; the inadequacy of health care for them; whether it’s the lack of affordable housing; the absence of jobs at living wages; all those things

        None of those things are “violence”.

      • TARDIS

        True Story about a story: Back in the day, my coworker sat across the aisle from this dumbass, in coach, on a flight to or from LAX. I can’t remember. The entitled fucker whined the whole trip about it. Hey asshole, in your perfect world there is only one cabin class, and only the Nomenklatura are in it.

      • Pine_Tree

        Unrelated to the original, but my celebrity airplane story: On a redeye from LAX to ATL about 20 years ago. I was coming home from CAN. Bono (from U2) and his entourage of Euro-looking guys with shiny suits are in the waiting area. Bono’s on the floor behind an aisle, because it was the only way to plug in his laptop. We boarded and I’m in Business and so are all the shiny guys. Only open Business seat’s beside me, so I figure Bono’s coming and get ready to say “hey, aren’t you Sting?”. He gets on the plane last and sits back in cattle-class. Open seat by me the whole time.

      • pan fried wylie

        He gets on the plane last and sits back in cattle-class.

        Better chance of getting fawned over than next to some BUSINESS-*huff*-guy that doesn’t even know who he is.

    • Hyperion

      Broccolitard has failed again! 3 strikes and you’re out, Broccolitard! Chopping Broccolee, we chopping Broccoleye! You will never be first again!

      • Rebel Scum

        Weird thing is that I just got home from work, fed the cats, took off my pants*, and logged onto the computer.

        *No need to read into that. I am usually sans pants at home.

      • Hyperion

        After all of us broke our F5 keys three time and had to replace them so that we could beat Broccolitard.

      • TARDIS

        No need to read into that. I am usually sans pants at home.

        Same reason I’m not allowed in movie theaters anymore.

      • Tres Cool

        You’re Paul Reubens ?

      • TARDIS

        “I was just trying to butter my popcorn!”
        /Paul Reubens [stolen]

        And not that kind of theater. Do they even have those anymore?

      • Tres Cool

        Not around here, I dont think.

        GT may remember the “glory days” (hah!) of the Palace Theater in Dayton. I have a couple great stories about that plce…

      • Chafed

        Go on.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        Me too. Today i almost left my apartment in my boxers. Had my sneakers on and went to put my wallet and cell in my pockets when.O noticed i had no pants

  2. leon

    FIRST OPEN POST ANARCHY

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        OK………….

      • Nephilium

        /pushes trash can over.

      • Lady Z

        Heh, Magnitude is the best.

    • leon

      FOPA (Free Open Post Anarchy)

      ———-

      Rules:
      1. Everyone demands that links are equally distributed. NO person may link more than once, untill all have linked.
      2. All Laughs must be distributed. If you find a comment funny, but someone has already given a reaction of approval, you must distribute your applause to another commenter.
      3. All Posters Matter, but we shouldn’t ignore the historical oppression of posters who’s username is in all lowercase.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Im sorry, but the position of OPAF (Open Post Anarchy Free) is diametrically opposed to the view presented by FOPA

      • leon

        OPAF is linked to the historical oppression of commenters who’s names are in all lower case, and the Fascist commenting Regime!

      • Ownbestenemy

        As long as we agree that FOPA (Free Open Post Anarchy) doesn’t get a seat at the table, we will get along just fine.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Well I messed that up. I concede. You win

      • pan fried wylie

        really, it’s always the AFPOs that win in the (rear)end.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Fuck Off Tulpa!

      • Hyperion

        The rulez is there ain’t no rulez! This is a libertarian place, you Rethuglican!

      • mindyourbusiness

        Is this a knife fight?

  3. Yusef drives a Kia

    WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!
    /Howdy!

    • Hyperion

      I’m starting to believe that the instigators of all this wokeism, who are all white coastal elites, are hell bent on clearing out cities of white folk, along with middle and upper class minorities, and leaving poor blacks in a hopeless war zones of despair and no police, social programs, schools, or medical care. After all, who it going to pay for that shit when there’s no tax base left? They couldn’t get eugenics any other way, so this must be the new eugenics. Only no one will know it, until it’s too late.

      • creech

        Who’s paying? Why the suburbs of course. Philly’s been trying to regionalize its school district budget with the suburbs for years.
        The Dems have taken over all the suburban counties around Philly, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they go along with it now. But it will be the best way to swing the burbs back to the GOP if those feckless fucks decide to grow a spine.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        The way the asking prices for rentals and sales are going down, I thought your conspiracy theory was going in another direction at first.

      • Hyperion

        Not sure exactly what you mean, rut all rural properties around here seem to be increasing dramatically over the last couple of months.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        I’m saying… torture us city folk with lockdowns and riots so we leave, then swoop in and buy up everything cheap.

      • Rhywun

        I can’t wait to move soon. Probably not this year, but next is looking good. I’m paying way too much right now.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        2 words. Mon tana

      • Rhywun

        I just mean within my neighborhood. I have no desire to live in Montana.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        Oh I misunderstood and thought you were looking to get out.
        I told you about how cheap it is here. But then you’d have to live here.

      • Hyperion

        “then swoop in and buy up everything cheap”

        For what? Who will buy it? Everyone who could afford it, left.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        They buy it and stay. It’s city ecology

    • leon

      Speed Limit. Republicans and Democrats have the same ends, they just appeal to different groups.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Good luck enforcing that shit in Texas. What the hell happened to Abbott, does Fauci have a video of him on Epstein’s island or something?

      • Suthenboy

        Years ago at about the height of Glenn Beck’s popularity he claimed that George Soros requested a meeting and was told in no uncertain terms that Beck should get on board with the left’s agenda, that it was too late to stop it and if he didnt he would be crushed. Not long after that Beck was fired from FOX.

      • The Hyperbole

        And he went on to create his own million dollar media outlet and years later he’s still earning millions as a radio host. Would someone please crush me like that.

      • Derpetologist

        OK, that point definitely goes to Hyperion. Well done.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Poor Hyperbole.

      • The Hyperbole

        I’ve learned to ignore it, I’m not seething with rage or anything.

      • Derpetologist

        I now see what I did. Oopsy. Well what do expect if 2 guys’ names both start with hyper?

        Sometimes I forget which bear or dog is talking. Get some more unique names an avatars, please!

      • Nephilium

        Florida Man and Floridaman have a sad.

      • Derpetologist

        Wait, there’s *2* of them?

      • Hyperion

        There’s only one Hyp and everyone knows who that is. So that mistake is completely understandable.

      • pan fried wylie

        Took me three tries to spot the substitution.

        Poor Hyperion, if you ask me.

  4. Nephilium

    Death Crystals?

    Rick Sanchez : Wait a minute, what? Morty, do you have a death crystal in your pocket?

    Morty Smith : No… Maybe.

    Rick Sanchez : You little monster! I thought you were masturbating!

    Morty Smith : And you took that in stride?

    Rick Sanchez : You rather I address it?

      • Nephilium

        Yep, I’m aware of that. In fact, there’s a whole trope about it (that link may be more dangerous then a wiki).

      • Lady Z

        Nice! I’ve seen my share of Lasagna Cat but had missed that one.

    • pan fried wylie

      Better every season, fight me.

      *crickets*

      • Rhywun

        I watched five minutes and couldn’t stand it. ?‍♂️

      • pan fried wylie

        the five minutes with the negatively portrayed NY Guy prolly.

      • Nephilium

        I’m mildly annoyed there was no reference to evil Morty, but I was happy with most of the new season.

  5. Timeloose

    The green crystal paper is horrifying. There seems to be no clear cause for them other than multiple organ failure.

    There is not a indication of what it is made from or what produces it in the body prior to staining.

    • SP

      Right?

      Obligatory: I’m not saying it’s aliens…

      • pan fried wylie

        Worse: Shadow Ecosystem

  6. Vacuous

    We should start referring to government buildings as monuments. Then encourage the media that these monuments need to be tore down because racism.

    • Chipwooder

      Start referring to elected officials as monuments.

      • TARDIS

        I’d like to refer to most of them as inmates.

      • pan fried wylie

        Sadly, the only way we’ll ever see criminal justice reform.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Your jib, I like the cut of it although I would guess that the Social Security office would still be sparred.

      • Hyperion

        Just as long as they don’t burn down the White Privilege office, I depend on that.

      • pan fried wylie

        “the White Privilege office”….argh, I can’t turn that into an acronym that sounds like “wypipo” without adding the word people to the title.

    • Count Potato

      The Washington Post is named after a slave-owner.

      • pan fried wylie

        C.W. Post?

  7. Derpetologist

    Today I learned that the German word for dwarf is Zwerg, which is one letter off from a race of malevolent video game aliens.

    A lot of Germanic words had g and gh sounds changed to f in English.

      • Aloysious

        Prof. Guy Gadboi, medieval castle authority…

        Not woke. Cancel immediately.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Garden gnomes are Gartenzwerge.

      • Derpetologist

        gnome etymology

        ***
        “dwarf-like earth-dwelling spirit,” 1712, from French gnome (16c.), from Medieval Latin gnomus, used 16c. in a treatise by Paracelsus, who gave the name pigmaei or gnomi to elemental earth beings, possibly from Greek *genomos “earth-dweller” (compare thalassonomos “inhabitant of the sea”).
        ***

      • pan fried wylie

        conflating dwarves and gnomes, wow.

        Way to shitlord, German Language, bra-fuckin-vo.

    • Ownbestenemy

      LOL

    • leon

      And wait till he gets cancelled for wearing redface

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Sweet!

    • Hyperion

      That’s racist, and them rednecks is putting the Covid in those fireworks!

      • pan fried wylie

        If you know of a less toxic pigment for green, then by ALL MEANS MISTER BIGSHOT CITY SLICKER.

        *spits*

    • Nephilium

      It’s the 9th, what’s the most wrong decision they can make? They’ll find one worse then that.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I think the churches made the right argument. They aren’t asking to be completely open, but that shouldn’t be a hard cap. Large cathedrals or mega churches only having 50 people in them doesn’t make sense. Cap at 50% capacity like everything else.

        State is allowing gamblers to sit close together, but not worshipers.

      • SP

        Who contributes more tax revenue on the face of it?

      • Ayn Random Variation

        Thank you for clarifying the reasoning behind the new rules that were just decreed. Now the science makes sense to me.

      • Nephilium

        They’re worshiping, just not a goddess that’s really accepted outside the Disc.

      • Suthenboy

        “They aren’t asking…”

        I see the root of the problem.

    • Hyperion

      Penaltax to the rescue!

    • Animal

      Life finds a way.

      • Derpetologist

        It sure does:

        Drunk Polar Bears
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5v850sGeUxM

        I read a great book of real bear stories and one of them was some campers waking up to find a passed out grizzly surrounded by about 40 empty bear cans. Interestingly, it only drank 1 of the light beers.

        A quadruped after my own heart.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        bear cans, I like it…..

      • TARDIS

        +1 *golf clap*

      • Derpetologist

        beer cans – sheesh

        Speaking of which, it’s about time for another beer run.

      • Overt

        I saw nothing to indicate that those were anything more than well fed bears.

        I have always been skeptical of the notion that 300 – 800lb animals (bears, cows, etc) would get drunk off of silage.

      • pan fried wylie

        If it continues to ferment while they’re digesting it?

      • Overt

        The problem is that most grains don’t have that much accessible sugar for wild yeasts to chow down on. We malt barley and then put it in a mash in order to change the starches into fermentable sugars. Corn has a pretty high sugar content, but my understanding is that it too gets converted into starch as it sits cut from the plant.

        When an animal eats it, they are oxygenating it, so at first there is no anaerobic fermentation going on…And then, how much sugar is there to really ferment? Is the yeast even able to propagate in the stomach?

      • pan fried wylie

        Ah. I’m one of the few non-brewers here so my familiarity is wikipedia level. How about if they stuffed themselves with fruit or honey? And honey? Cause where’s a bear gonna find that much honey in one sitting?

        I assume Fourscore has a multilayer antibear defense net, so that’s out.

    • Gadfly

      Huh. I thought they only ate plankton.

      It depends on what type of whale. I believe the biggest whales do in fact only eat plankton, but some of the smaller species eat fish.

      • Derpetologist

        But whale sharks, despite being the biggest fish in the sea, have throats only as wide as a quarter.

        ***
        “You know, the whale is not really a fish. It’s a mammal like you and me”

        “Is that true, Papa Homer?”

        “Pffft. No.”
        ***

    • Derpetologist

      Drunken Bear Stumbles Through Colorado
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0Xsqo-n_AE

      ♫ Look for the bare necessities (hiccup)
      The simple bare necessities
      Forget about your worries and your strife…

      • TARDIS

        Baloo was truly a wise bear.

      • Derpetologist

        fun fact: bhalu means bear in Hindi. Hathi means elephant. Aren’t writers just so creative?

        Kaa means snake. Kipling made up Mowgli and the first syllable rhymes with cow.

      • pan fried wylie

        ***
        [extended Derp exposition on the character names in dragonball all being food items]

        ***

      • Derpetologist

        Ahem! Piccolo?

        Ha! My nitpick-fu is stronger than your nitpick-fu!

  8. LJW

    A crazy leftist facederp “friend” just announced she’s voting for Jo. Judging on her previous posts, she shares no political beliefs with Jo. I can only assume she’s voting for her because she is a woman. Makes me wonder how many of those votes Jo will snag.

    • Hyperion

      My son said he’s voting for her as well. I just told him that I haven’t checked her out yet, but I’m voting for bad orange man.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Don’t know anything about her personally, but her libertarian platform seems solid. And also completely irrelevant. The LP should be focused entirely on working from the bottom up. Maybe run a presidential candidate when you have thousands of elected officials around the country, not dozens.

    • Overt

      My daughter did the same thing. These kids HATE what the dems did to Bernie…Actually, let me rephrase that. I think these kids have been told by influencers to hate what Biden did to Bernie.

      In any case, I told my daughter to focus on the Libertarian platform, and to look at people local to her, and see if maybe she could learn anything about their plank.

      I said it before, but if Jo were to strangely win, she would get even worse treatment than Trump. At least Trump had 1/3 of the GOP still supporting him.

  9. Playa Manhattan

    https://nypost.com/2020/07/02/powerful-men-are-scared-about-what-ghislaine-maxwell-will-say/

    “Such pockmarks, she says, were all over the interior. The entire house — every room, every bed, every bathroom, shower and toilet — was rigged with cameras and audio. Epstein kept a secret room full of monitors and watched his guests in real time. He blackmailed the powerful men who would visit and use his girls.”

    • Hyperion

      Anyone yet explain why she left the relative safety of France, yet? Did she spot some Clintons around there?

      • Spudalicious

        She paid cash through an LLC for the 150 acre property they found her on. Comments led me to believe they’ve always known where she’s been.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I wouldn’t want to be the guarantor of her life insurance policy right now.

      • Hyperion

        She has to be put in a witness protection program. I’m shocked that Flynn is still alive.

    • Suthenboy

      No. Shit.
      Ya think?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That’s strange isn’t it? Can’t say I’ve ever heard of that happening before.

      • Hyperion

        Have you ever seen anyplace as woke and corrupt as NOVA? Me either. You don’t order evidence destroyed unless you are scared of what is in it.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Eh…

    • DEG

      I liked it.

    • Tres Cool

      Check out the hook while his DJ revolves it.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        Thank you for clarifying the reasoning behind the new rules that were just decreed. Now the science makes sense to me.

  10. DEG

    One of these followed me home from the gun store today.

    My plan is to make this my new carry gun for the rare occasions I carry. My 1911 has developed problems and is at a smith. I also always considered it a bit bulky.

    I like my CZ-75 full size but I wanted a decocker for the DA/SA.

    After some thought, I decided on this.

    • Sean

      Nice!

    • Drake

      I have a P-07 that I keep in DA with the decocker. I’m not a great pistolero but I like it.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’ve got one of those in .40. Nice gun with a slim grip for a double stack.

      • Drake

        Cool. How’s the recoil with the .40?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        A little snappy but no worse than a midsize Glock in the same caliber. They’re good pistols and the price is right too.

    • I'm Here To Help

      My normal carry pistol right now is a Springfield XD-E in a .45. It didn’t take me long to get used to the DA/SA, and my shots are consistent with either. Wanted to try the CZ, but I just couldn’t find one anywhere near me.

      That said, if the 911 9mm comes back from Springfield with the failure to feed issues taken care of, it will likely replace the XD-E – it’s very easy to carry the 911 in a pocket holster and is much more comfy than the IWB rig I have…

      • LJW

        Meant to link to the P365SAS

  11. DEG

    PA just got fucked

    The state Supreme Court sided with Gov. Tom Wolf in his battle with the General Assembly over the state’s emergency declaration due to the coronavirus pandemic.

    The high court ruled Wednesday the state General Assembly can’t act unilaterally to end Wolf’s emergency declaration. The court said the legislature can’t use unconstitutional means to overturn the governor’s decision to suspend laws, since the General Assembly already gave that power to the governor.

    • creech

      Screwed again by feckless Republicans who control both houses of the PA legislature. They failed to impeach the Supreme Court justices when they unconstitutionally redrew congressional district lines in 2018. They failed to change the laws giving governors this emergency power. They fucked the pension system back when Tom Ridge was governor in 2003 and have no appetite for reforming it now. Where’s all this getting them? Nowhere – because the RINOs in the suburbs are being picked off in bunches by actual Democrats.

      • Suthenboy

        Yep. Who needs Antifa?

    • Ayn Random Variation

      Long live the King.
      I got into it with a coworker today over this today.
      She’s on board, and even said this should continue indefinitely when I said there probably won’t ever be a vaccine.
      She heard about 2 people under 70 who are seriously sick with the rona, blah blah blah.

    • Ayn Random Variation

      “The high court ruled Wednesday the state General Assembly can’t act unilaterally to end Wolf’s emergency declaration. ”

      Unilaterally
      Face palm

      • Gustave Lytton

        Can’t act “unilaterally” under the plain wording of the law that both the legislature passed and the governor signed. But the law itself that grants the governor unilateral power is perfectly ok.

        There aren’t enough wood chippers in the world.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        How could anyone write that sentence and not notice this?

        It’s probably because the left started using unilateral as a synonym for bad when Bush unilaterally, with the consent of Congress, invaded Iraq.

      • kbolino

        And a bunch of other countries that spontaneously agreed to unilaterally act at the same time

      • Ayn Random Variation

        Those countries didn’t matter if I remember the reasoning at the time.
        That clusterfuck was as bipartisan and multilateral as it gets.

    • Sean

      Well, fuck.

    • kbolino

      I figured they would fuck this up. The very same law that specifies “unconstitutional means” to end the emergency is the one that the governor gets his power from. I guess the court can rewrite the laws and the legislature can’t do jack shit about it without a veto-proof majority. Rule by arbitrary standards.

      • Nephilium

        Why am I feeling we’re getting close to box four?

  12. DEG

    Hero

    The Palmyra Italian eatery Taste of Sicily has now racked up $10,000 in fines for allowing customers to eat in their dining room before they moved to the “green” phase of the state’s reopening plan.

    The restaurant’s owners showed themselves getting served the latest citation in a video posted to their Facebook page. Two inspectors from the Department of Agriculture enter the Main Street establishment and leave the $4,000 citation behind, without saying a word.

    “Would you guys care to do an interview?” co-owner Christine Wartluft asks, while following the men to their car. “And you call yourselves an American, giving hard working people a fine? It’s ridiculous.”

    • creech

      I must say these Dept. of Ag inspectors must have a lot of courage if they are serving fines on a bunch of Sicilians.

      • Tres Cool

        Other than never getting involved in a land war in Asia, you NEVER go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line.
        +Classic Blunder

      • Hyperion

        My wife’s grandmother was a Brazlian immigrant from Sicily. I swear half of her family look like the Sicilian mafia and she has that ‘Ah Maria! *throws her hands up* ‘get out of my kitchen!’ temper’, I gotta be on the alert all the time for her go into sassy mode, it is not good. But man, can she cook, all the women in her family can.

    • SP

      I wish we were closer. We’d go have dinner there.

      • DEG

        #metoo

        If I still lived in PA, I’d be there often.

      • Nephilium

        There’s a reason I made it a point to go to a local eatery that both stood behind an employee, and stretched the definition of patio as far as they could. In the before times, they had a good beer selection, but I felt the food was overpriced for what you got (and there were a large number of other options around).

      • DEG

        I got dinner last night at a Nashua bar where virtually everyone does not wear a mask despite the Nashua mask mandate. While I was eating, a Nashua cop showed up to talk to the staff. The cop had a mask on, I didn’t have a mask on, the staff didn’t have masks on.

        I didn’t hear everything the staff and the cop said, but it sounded like the staff gave the cop a phone number at some point.

        I haven’t seen any news about mask mandate enforcement today. Hopefully that’s not what the visit was about, but I am a little worried.

      • Nephilium

        Last time I went up to this establishment, even the staff had pretty much given up on masks. They’re still under mandate to wear them there. I’m getting really upset about the rumblings about shutting the states down (county by county this time) though.

      • mikey

        Martha’s?
        I miss Martha’s.

    • Ayn Random Variation

      Excellent. If i could go there I would. Just sent that to a more mobile PA friend

    • Count Potato

      It rarely does.

      Still, backing out slowly might have been much smarter than getting out of the car and pulling a gun.

      • Hyperion

        Yeah, sure, just wait for the rest of the mob to show up.

      • Count Potato

        I think there were only four people there. Well, five if you count the baby.

      • Hyperion

        Well, she was singing the ‘I’m a beat your bitch ass’ mating song. Maybe there’s a waffle house across the street?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        They would have gotten bumped, “injured,” and hello lawsuit. Agreed it wasn’t the smartest course of action because of what could have happened but she was released without charges and it all worked out for the best.

      • Hyperion

        What the left and the media have done to improve race relations is truly astounding. Soon, we’ll be more segregated than we were in 1850.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        They were spoiling for a confrontation and sorely need some impulse control. Acting like that is just asking to get shot if done to the wrong person.

      • Suthenboy

        Having adversarial confrontations with strangers is a very, very bad idea unless you are looking to get your ass handed to you. I dont care who or how tough you are, that is going to happen sooner or later.

        Kid I went to school with was #2 karate fighter in the world. He lost the #1 by a hair in Seoul, Korea in….uh…’83? ’84?
        They used to put him in exhibitions where he would whip the shit out of guys twice his size and weight. He would go out on weekends and kick the hell out of the local toughs for fun. He was a real badass.

        The last words he heard were “I know who you are”. The last sound he heard was a shotgun blast.

      • Tres Cool

        When I was in the military, a friend of mine and I were parked at bar. A couple seats down from us was a guy that boxed on the post. Poorly. He was getting his ass whipped more often than not. Some random guy (not a boxer, but Im assuming followed the sport) pretty drunk, walked up and started talking shit. Boxer guy told him more than once to take a hike, he was having a quiet drink- possibly lamenting his most recent asswhoop. Drunk guy didnt want to listen, and this escalated to he either shoved or poked boxer guy. Within a matter of just a couple seconds, I heard what could have been a 2×4 breaking, and saw loud-mouth on the floor. Just like in a western, boxer dude sat down to his beer & shot, while loudmouth’s friends dragged him out.
        My friend that was next to me elbowed me and said, “See? Even a shitty boxer is a really good fighter.”

        But to address your point- even the best fighter isnt bulletproof.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        I can’t reply to tres cool below directly but i had a kind of similar experience once in JC.
        Long story short this guy was giving me shit in a pizzeria. I tried to ignore him until he got too close for comfort and put his hand on.my shoulder.
        Next thing I know he’s on the floor and I’m smashing him in the face with one of those heavy napkin holders pizzerias have.
        Then i sat back down and finished my slice.

      • mrfamous

        This. The idea that anything that has gone on for the last month and continues to go on is making things “better” is absolutely absurd.

        “Eye for an eye, leaves the whole world blind.” Unless you’re a silver spoon like Gavin Newsom or something, everybody’s got a legit gripe with the world. An endless cascade of “settling scores” leads to misery.

      • Ayn Random Variation

        One thing we know for sure after the Seattle thing is that once they go to the politicians’ neighborhood that shit gets shut down fast.

    • Suthenboy

      Why, that is a very different story than I heard before.

      • Hyperion

        Shocking isn’t it. Why did they arrest her and take here gun?

      • Suthenboy

        If someone makes a complaint that you menaced them with a gun the cops are going to arrest you, take your gun and then the investigation proceeds from there. It looks like in this case they got it right.

    • Rebel Scum

      FOX 2 Detroit reported that the white woman was arrested and her gun was taken away. She was later released.

      Did she get her gun back?

    • Overt

      There are tons of people out there trying to 1) get their video to go viral by setting up a situation like the Karen the Dog Walker or Karen the BLM Bitch and cashing in on the money or 2) Threaten people that they have such a video and use that to blackmail a person into paying them money.

      I am betting this is #2- the fact that the couple got into the car, and the car started backing out, only for the woman to run behind the car and act like she was going to be hit, tells me that they are straight up grifters.

  13. Derpetologist

    I stumbled into the beyond section of Wikipedia again:

    ***
    Jiraiya (自来也 or 児雷也, literally “Young Thunder”[1]), originally known as Ogata Shuma Hiroyuki, is the toad-riding character of the Japanese folklore Jiraiya Gōketsu Monogatari (児雷也豪傑物語, “The Tale of the Gallant Jiraiya”).

    n the legend, Jiraiya is a ninja who uses shapeshifting magic to morph into a gigantic toad. As the heir of the mighty Ogata clan in Kyūshū, Jiraiya fell in love with Tsunade (綱手), a beautiful young maiden who has mastered slug magic.
    ***

    Maiden of Slug Magic.

    Hmm, good band name

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jiraiya

    • Tres Cool

      Pretty sure I saw “Maiden of Slug Magic” open for L7 back in the day.
      Or maybe that was an L7 song.

  14. Gustave Lytton

    Can I root for everyone (except the private business and their employees) getting fucked over this?

    https://youtu.be/L0vZmjdTbFY

    Sorry dipshit, you’re a state employee. If your employer says masks are part of the uniform just like your shirt or badge, that’s it. Quit if you don’t like it. I’m tired of this more animals are equal bullshit.

    • Suthenboy

      I am torn. Is this a ‘some animals are more equal than others’ situation or do we need more cops that understand what ‘inalienable rights’ mean?
      I need more info.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Since they wear uniform shirts, shoes, and whatever else their employer tells them to like how their hair should be styled, this isn’t an inalienable right. Fuck em. Quit or be fired.

      • Gustave Lytton

        If it was cops refusing to enforce an unconstitutional law against private parties, that would be one thing. But it isn’t. And they’re putting liability onto the business.

        Hell, for all they know, if the business didn’t ask them to put on masks as per the cops’ bosses’ order, it could be a sting operation.

      • Suthenboy

        I had not thought of it like that…you are correct.

        My instinct was to see ‘mandatory mask’ and reflex with ‘the fuck you say’. That is the lazy, half-drunk me.

      • Overt

        “My instinct was to see ‘mandatory mask’ and reflex with ‘the fuck you say’. That is the lazy, half-drunk me.”

        Can this just be the next slogan on our flag? God bless America. Maybe it could be drunk bear knocking trash all over the yard instead of a snake?

  15. AlmightyJB

    Busiest I’ve seen this Beer Barrel since Ohio reopened.

    • AlmightyJB

      Having a nice light house Helles made by Platform. Good Summer beer.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Founders All day IPA Session ale, I don’t do sessions usually, but these are nice Summer ales,
        Cheers!

      • AlmightyJB

        Cheers!

      • Nephilium

        I gave up on Platform once they sold out. But are you up in Put in Bay?

      • AlmightyJB

        Actually I’ve never been:)!

      • Nephilium

        I’ve been several times. It’s a terrible, terrible place that everyone should visit back in their 20’s. Just realize you can get an OVI on a bicycle or a golf cart, and walk everywhere.

        People don’t go there for any reason other then to drink too much, listen to shitty music, and enjoy themselves.

    • straffinrun

      It takes two to Polka.

    • AlmightyJB

      To me it’s not really about the statues. It’s about temporary servants just doing whatever the fuck they please while holding up their finger to any residents of the city who may not agree. Tyranny of the mob is ugly.

      • Suthenboy

        It is about the ideas that the statues represent. It is a full-on assault of the ideas the country was founded on. If they win we will be back to straight up chattel slavery.

      • AlmightyJB

        We’re living inside 1984 and Animal Farm.

      • Rhywun

        The only statues I’m seeing some pushback on are Columbus statues. Interesting, that.

      • Count Potato

        Didn’t they remove the Columbus statue from Columbus, Ohio this week?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Ah, the statue that was paid for by actual freed slaves. Makes perfect sense.

    • Rhywun

      diversity-inclusion

      URL’ed without any self-awareness….

      • Derpetologist

        TEPID

        Tolerance
        Equality
        Political Correctness (?)
        Inclusion
        Diversity

        I forget who coined this, but I think it was Steven Pinker.

    • Drake

      Israeli ripoff of the AK.

    • Derpetologist

      The main difference is that the Galil has a greater distance between the front and rear sights, which improves accuracy.

      ***
      Unlike the AK, the Galil featured a milled receiver, better sights, a flash hider and accuracy the AK could only sniff at. Despite all of these improvements, the Galil wasn’t perfect. While the milled steel receiver made it tough and accurate, it was heavy; the gun weighed in at up to 9.6 pounds.
      ***

      related:

      ***
      “Superiority” is a science fiction short story by British writer Arthur C. Clarke, first published in 1951. It depicts an arms race during an interstellar war. It shows the side which is more technologically advanced being defeated, despite its apparent superiority, because of its willingness to discard old technology without having fully perfected the new. Meanwhile, the enemy steadily built up a far larger arsenal of weapons that while more primitive were also more reliable. The story was at one point required reading for an industrial design course at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.[1]
      ***

      Simple = efficient = effective

      • Suthenboy

        There is nothing you can do to a gun that will not improve it’s accuracy over an AK. Have you ever shot one of those things?
        The SKS was a far superior weapon. The 7.62×39 round is very effective out to about 300 yards, after that….not so much.

      • Derpetologist

        I have a Zastava, which is a Serbian variant of the AK in 5.56. The sights are basically worthless. I shoot more accurately from the hip with it.

        Fun fact: it’s classified as a handgun even though it shoots a rifle round. Thanks, Republic of Texas!

    • Derpetologist

      The Tavor (5.56 bull-pup rifle) is my favorite Israeli gun. I shot an Uzi at the Vegas Machine Gun Experience a few years ago and that was fun too.

    • Suthenboy

      No, you are not. 9 hours of Historical Geology done learned me that every life form you have ever seen or imagined has been tried ten times over, and a lot more you haven’t seen or thought of.
      Hell, just in the last month I described my recent encounters with critters I have never seen before and I have spent a lifetime in the outdoors here in Louisiana. Spiders, wasps, moths and a snake I could not identify.

      • Derpetologist

        The Burgess Shale formation may yet have some surprises for you: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fossils_of_the_Burgess_Shale

        ***
        Whittington’s first presentation about Opabinia made the audience laugh.[35] The reconstruction showed a soft-bodied animal with a slim, segmented body; a pair of flap-like appendages on each segment with gills above the flaps; five stalked eyes; a backward-facing mouth under the head; and a long, flexible, hose-like proboscis that extended from under the front of the head and ended in a “claw” fringed with spines. Whittington concluded that it did not fit into any phylum known in the mid-1970s.[36] Opabinia was one of the main reasons why Stephen Jay Gould in his book Wonderful Life considered that Early Cambrian life was much more diverse and “experimental” than any later set of animals, and that the Cambrian explosion was a truly dramatic event, possibly driven by unusual evolutionary mechanisms.[37] He regarded Opabinia as so important to understanding this phenomenon that he originally wanted call his book Homage to Opabinia.[38] However subsequent research has concluded that Opabinia is closely related to the arthropods and possibly even closer to ancestors of the arthropods.[39]

        The discovery of Anomalocaris (“abnormal shrimp”) was a comedy of errors.[40] The name was initially given to a fossil that looked like the rear end of a shrimp-like crustacean. Walcott classified a ring-like fossil he called Peytoia as a kind of jellyfish, and another poorly preserved fossil he called Laggania as a holothurian (sea cucumber).[40] After many plot twists, Derek Briggs started dissecting another ill-defined fossil in very thin slices and found a pair of Anomalocaris-like structures on one end of a specimen of Laggania, which also had a specimen of Peytoia attached just behind those of Anomalocaris. After dissecting more specimens and finding similar configurations, Briggs and Whittington concluded that the whole assemblage represented a single animal, which was named Anomalocaris because that was the earliest name assigned to any of its parts. This animal’s body was fragile and usually disintegrated before it could be fossilized.[40] But the complete animal had tough grasping appendages (Anomalocaris), a tough, ring-like mouth with teeth on the inner edge (Peytoia) and a long, segmented body (Laggania) with flaps on the sides that enabled it to swim with a Mexican wave motion, and perhaps to turn quickly by putting the flaps on one side into reverse.[40][41] This monster was over 2 feet (0.61 m) long when other animals were only a few inches at most.[41][42] Nedin suggested in 1999 that the animal was capable of taking heavily armored trilobites apart, possibly by grabbing one end of their prey in their jaws while using their appendages to quickly rock the other end of the animal back and forth, causing the prey’s exoskeleton to rupture and allowing the predator to access its innards.
        ***

      • pan fried wylie

        Loved him in the Rocky films.

      • Derpetologist

        [narrows gaze]

        That was Burgess Meredith, you philistine!

        It’s not fair! It’s not fair at all!

        Where’s my umbrella*?

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tS3fBA-dN0g

        *umbrella means little shadow in Eye-tie
        ** Fiorello means little flower in Dagospeak

      • Suthenboy

        That critter seems familiar but I dont remember where I saw it. Have you linked to it before?

        If you really like this subject you should take a Florida vacation and dont forget to bring your dive card. Try doing some drift dives down nearly any river there and spend some time in the deeper holes picking through the deposits there. You will find a wealth of both marine and land fossils…everything from sharks teeth to elephant bones.

        I missed it by an inch….I dont know how. One of my brother’s co-workers found a 18″ pre-columbian dagger carved from mammoth ivory in the Santa Fe….I had just looked over the spot two minutes earlier where he found it and I missed it.

        *kicks own ass*

        *kicks own ass again*

  16. leon

    https://youtu.be/rmoln-XK3Gw

    Watching these clips of Biden, and the faces of the people taking to him, knowing they are dealing with their old neighbor.

    Nothing wrong with being old, but maybe it’s time to retire and relax at home.

    • Derpetologist

      I sometimes feel guilty for having mocked Biden, who is now senile and has experienced various tragedies as well as overcoming a stutter. On the other hand, he is a career politician who has flip-flopped shamelessly, said numerous stupid things, and used his connections to get various sweetheart deals for his family.

      History’s greatest monster? No, but not a paragon of virtue either. I’d say overall he’s below average in the decency department even compared to other politicians.

      • straffinrun

        He’s a nasty, vindictive prick that hides his contempt for the average person by pretending he’s one of them. Other than that, he’s fine.

      • Derpetologist

        +1 Look, Fat…

        +1 Lying dog-faced pony soldier

        If he had an R after his name, he’d have been the punchline of SNL jokes for 40 years.

      • Rhywun

        I don’t go there myself. Getting old fucking sucks, as I am slowing learning.

      • Rhywun

        “slowly”

        See?

      • Nephilium

        Nope. I’m done with sympathy for any petty tyrant.

  17. Rebel Scum

    This statue did not topple itself.

    People reported seeing what appeared to be a bronze statue of the deceased pedophile placed in front of Albuquerque’s old city hall, according to a report by KOAT.

    Below the statue was a plaque, which read:

    Jeffrey (January 20, 1953 – August 10, 2019) Epstein was an American Financier, who started as a teacher and worked his way up from a low level assistant to being one of the top financial advisers in the U.S.A. He had a home in New Mexico, Zorro Ranch. He was also a rapist who died in prison.

    The plaque then went on to list several court cases involving the late disgraced financier and his victims. And at the bottom, there was a statement, which read, “Generously provided to Bernalillo County by The Antlion Entertainment ‘Art’ Collective.”

    The erection of the controversial Epstein statue arrives in the wake of statues of non-controversial figures being toppled by protesters across the country — such as first U.S. president George Washington and former president and Union Army General during the Civil War Ulysses S. Grant.

    Is what got him in trouble in the first place.

  18. Rebel Scum

    “Liberals get the bullet too.”

    People’s City Council – Los Angeles
    @PplsCityCouncil

    “As we talk about a white supremacist terrorist like Donald Trump remember that we live in a city that is largely liberal white supremacists. So, when you say ‘Fuck Donald Trump, make sure you say Fuck Eric Garcetti’” – @docmellymel

    • pan fried wylie

      Has KRS-One weighed-in yet?

    • Ayn Random Variation

      Sheeeeeeeeitttttttttttt

      • Derpetologist

        +1 longest word in Ebonics

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Family Truckster, this is the answer you seek,

      • pan fried wylie

        False: rednecks would never rely on a vehicle that takes a 200yd jump that poorly.

      • pan fried wylie

        Correct: The Bluesmobile

    • Derpetologist

      ♫ Oooh, like a rock!

    • Gustave Lytton

      So now it’s a job? Coming from Mr “I don’t work for you”.

    • Rebel Scum

      He obviously ain’t down with the “struggle”. #Canceled

    • Ted S.

      It depends on whether they’re My Pillows or not.

    • Grummun

      All of them.

    • straffinrun

      It only took one to stop RP McMurphy.