Friday Morning Links

by | Aug 21, 2020 | Daily Links | 505 comments

Good morning my Glibs and Gliberinas!  And what a beautiful day it always is!

 

Sloppy Steve pleads not guilty.

 

DNC backs “assault” weapons ban at convention.

 

Hunter Biden vouches for father’s honesty.

 

New York Exodus.

 

Weekly jobless claims back up above one million.

 

American Airlines cutting off service to 15 small US cities.

 

If there was any time in history for Republicans to make a proposal to switch to a voucher systems/ give money directly to the parent to decide how to educate their child, now would be that time.

 

I believe these are called taco stands.

 

That is all I got for today.  I’ll leave you with a song and move along with my day.

About The Author

Banjos

Banjos

Wife of sloopy, mother to three bright, curious, and highly active young girls. Perpetually exhausted.

505 Comments

  1. Surly Knott

    I’m sure Bonnie would have proclaimed Clyde’s innocence of any murders, too.
    Who would believe Hunter Biden that wasn’t already convinced?

    • Fourscore

      What passes for normal in the Biden family may be different from others’ expectations. I’m guessing lots of families don’t do hair sniffing either so there you go.

    • WTF

      Crooked Hunter says crooked Joe not really crooked.
      Well, I’m convinced.
      Mornin’ Banjos.

      • Banjos

        Mornin’

  2. Scruffy Nerfherder

    *checks AA cancellations*

    I’m surprised our little airport wasn’t on the list.

    • Annoyed Nomad

      I expected to see Dayton on the list, but fortunately it wasn’t.

      • Annoyed Nomad

        Yet.

  3. UnCivilServant

    Mornin’ Banjos.

    American Airlines is still flying?

    • Banjos

      Mornin’

    • Tundra

      I just flew them last month. The cleanest airplane I think I’ve ever been on.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Wow. Now I know they’re in trouble. AA must have nothing else to do because they’re god-awful about cleaning their planes.

        Now FinnAir on the other hand…

      • Nephilium

        And here I was looking to make a jape about Tundra being the first person to fly with American in the past couple months.

      • Tundra

        Lol.

        I usually have to Fly AA to the Caribbean, and I agree. Their planes are usually pretty bad.

        We flew to Reagan and then to Bangor. Granted, both were regionals, but the planes were spotless, the service was great and both flights were early.

        Traveling during the ‘vid fucking rocks!

      • AlexinCT

        I have flown AA, Delta and South West recently, and I have to tell you that they ALL are doing extra work to keep their aircraft looking clean (and sanitized).

  4. Sean

    Hunter Biden vouches for father’s honesty.

    “That’s gotta be a Bee link.”

    *Clicks*

    “Holy Shit!”

    • Pope Jimbo

      It fits the convention theme: We are gonna rub your noses in our duplicity!

      Clinton speaks on appropriate behavior in the Oval Office
      Cuomo speaks on how great NY’s Rona Response was
      Warren chairs Native American caucus/panel

      Hunter Biden talking about Joe’s honesty is just another example of the Dems insulting the intelligence of their loyal party followers. Or maybe it is the final phase in their plan to completely abase the MSM. Forcing them to write straight up propaganda or get thrown off the plantation.

      • Rhywun

        It’s Orwellian. The most enthusiastic participants in doublethink get the plum positions.

      • AlexinCT

        Tell big whopping fucking lies, have your operatives with bylines back your lies up and attack any truths your opponent calls you out one, and pray the stupid mob doesn’t see through the fact your sole agenda is to get back in power so you can protect the most weaponized and corrupt unelected segment of government weaponized by your last WH occupant and used to abuse every citizen’s rights from being slowed down or even dismantled.

        I no longer believe people that fall for this shit are just being duped. Too many of them willingly go along because they need to pretend they are more righteous for believing this bullshit team blue peddles.

      • Drake

        Taking the left’s opposite rule to a new extreme.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        Clinton speaks on appropriate behavior in the Oval Office
        Cuomo speaks on how great NY’s Rona Response was
        Warren chairs Native American caucus/panel

        Stacey Abrams on the Democrat Governors panel…

    • Rebel Scum

      If anyone is an excellent judge of character, integrity, etc., it is Hunter Biden.

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Some argue that the city has faced crisis before, such as the attacks of September 11, 2001, but has always bounced back stronger than ever.

    Fred Wilson, the co-founder of Union Square Ventures, argued in a blog post on Wednesday that the crisis would make the city a better place to live.

    ‘It is certainly the case that many talented people are leaving NYC right now. It is also the case that the city is suffering from rising crime, filth, etc,’ he wrote.
    A StreetEasy map shows the areas with highest vacancy

    A StreetEasy map shows the areas with highest vacancy

    ‘NYC is not going out of business. It will need a turnaround. It will need new leadership, which it will get. The pandemic will end. Restaurants, museums, broadway, nightclubs, etc, etc, etc will re-open.

    ‘It won’t be the same NYC that existed pre-pandemic. But that is a good thing. NYC has sucked for the last decade or more,’ he added.

    That’s a compelling argument.

    I wonder if he plans to vote for the Republicans, this time.

    • Nephilium

      Entertainingly enough, the local rag posted a story about how Cleveland is the fifth fastest shrinking large city. Of course… they’re counting Anchorage and Toledo as large cities, and there’s no mention of NYC in the list.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      I’m friends with an economist who got hired by a NYC (non-Wall-Street) firm about 6 months ago, with the understanding that he’ll move to NYC at some point but with no firm date because, you know *waves in general direction of everything* He must licking his chops at all this open real estate up for grabs.

  6. Tres Cool

    mornin’

    • Banjos

      Mornin’

  7. The Late P Brooks

    I saw a clip of Biden pounding the podium and telling America he will “get control” of the virus. We have to get control of the virus to save the economy. Maybe he has Neil Kashkari writing his material.

    • Fourscore

      First he has to get control of his incontinence, then he’ll take on the virus, guns, and the inequalities that life presents.

    • Drake

      Maybe tax the virus until it goes away? Seems to work with people in NYC.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The answer is a national mask ordnance put in place by executive order.

      • Viking1865

        If he wins, the Congress will pass a national mask law and Trump will sign it as the lame duck, then the media will switch to counting deaths, not cases and voila the COVID IS GONE, well done electing Democrats, you finally redeemed yourselves.

      • Cancelled

        You are never redeemed. You bear blood guilt. That is the great invention of the totalitarians.

    • Hyperion

      The media will change the narrative on the pandemic and say everything is A-OK as soon as we win. Then we can go back to our normal corruption and taxing everyone to death. /democrats

  8. Tundra

    Ahhh, Bach.

    Good morning, Banjos! I hope you, Sloop and the girls are well.

    The school thing really grinds my gears. I can’t wait for the next extortion attempt – “we need moar money! For the children! Technology!”

    The gym that I go to just introduced new kid programs for parents who have to work. Varied subjects, including exercise. 5 to 1 ratio.

    I think it’s a brilliant move on their part. And I wonder who will do a better job…

    More Bach (get out your lighter)

    Make it a great day, people!

    Fuck off.

      • Cancelled

        Skid Row makes you drool?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      he gym that I go to just introduced new kid programs for parents who have to work. Varied subjects, including exercise. 5 to 1 ratio.

      That’s fantastic.

    • Raven Nation

      “Ahhh, Bach.”

      +1 Radar O’Reilly

      • Mad Scientist
    • Overt

      My daughters’ cheer and dance schools (they did summer camp a few years back, and we never unsubscribed from their email list) all have “School Camps” going. Like your gym they will supervise the kids all day and then after words do their normal program, but for several hours (2:00 – 5, daily).

      Both of these schools are well regarded- they produce competitors on the national level. So it is essentially like sending your kid to a private dance school for their primary education.

      Those schools could never do a full curriculum but the stupid teachers unions have given them the perfect setup. It’s as if the grocery stores said, “Ok, we’ll keep selling the milk and bread since that is what the people really need, and you sell them the high margin stuff”.

    • TARDIS

      Fuck off.

      Already on it.

      Rumors are that no one else is losing their jobs, but we will be reduced hours for the rest of 2020. I don’t want anyone to lose their jobs, but I’m not happy about forced charity either.

    • Banjos

      Mornin’

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Nice. I’ll counting the days until someone at MPR to write a think piece about how your gym’s program should be shut down because it won’t single-handedly reduce “the education gap”.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        “I’ll counting the days”

        Clearly, I could use some podding as well.

  9. UnCivilServant

    New York Exodus.

    New Yorkers are divided on whether leaving the city is a prudent move in a time of crisis, or a betrayal of their beloved city.

    The city betrayed you first.

  10. The Late P Brooks

    “Business journalism”

    As California becomes one of the first states to take on Big Tech in the ongoing battle over the employment status of Uber and Lyft drivers, the scofflaw ride-hailing companies are now working their political contacts to avoid complying with a law that has been on the books for almost a year.

    und so weiter

    • Swiss Servator

      “Bold move” – drive the business from your state, leave consumers without the service and destroy the jobs the drivers and other employees had. “Bold” indeed.

      • juris imprudent

        “They aren’t real jobs!!!” /screeching harpy progressive

      • Tundra

        Screeching harpy progressive who hasn’t missed a paycheck.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        Reminds me of the “Your insurance wasn’t real insurance!!!” screeching post-Obamacare.

      • leon

        As they force you to buy “insurance” that covers things that are not risk protection.

      • Rhywun

        Meh, poor people don’t deserve an affordable option to the State’s possibly-existent transit options anyway.

    • Ownbestenemy

      They are scofflaws? Nice writing there…

    • Agent Cooper

      If AB5 ever comes to my state, I’m moving.

  11. Fourscore

    Steve Bannon has the look of an participating drunk. Reinforces my belief that booze is a gift.

    • Swiss Servator

      Like a non-malevolent, ineffective Baron Vladimir Harkonnen.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        And a triple amputee Feyd-Rautha.

      • Swiss Servator

        *waves one foot at Paul Atreides*

      • Not Adahn

        Get that idea to Villeneuve, stat!

      • Swiss Servator

        “My Left Foot of Kanly”?

  12. The Late P Brooks

    I watched some vintage apocalypse porn last night. A movie called Threads (on Amazon). England is collateral damage in a nuclear exchange between Russia and the US. Over Iran; the more things change, et c. Death and destruction on a grand scale, mayhem, looting, rats (lots and lots of rats!), feral dogs and children, and on and on. Post holocaust government primarily manifests itself as soldiers shooting people.

    You can’t hug your children with nuclear arms, people! How many times do we have to tell you this?

    The most aggravating part is the complete lack of any sort of spontaneous human collaboration such as we see every time a hurricane or tornado hits. Not even warlordism. Just a bunch of pathetic shambling helpless victims, scratching in the dirt for grubs. After years, there is nothing resembling a return to constructive, organized human enterprise.

    Bah!

    • Raven Nation

      I remember watching that in Australia when it first came out. It was produced some time after The Day After. The promo line for Threads was something like, “not just the day after, but years and generations.”

    • UnCivilServant

      No warlords? Is this only the five days after the bombs fall?

    • Swiss Servator

      IT’S ALL REAGAN’S FAULT!

    • Cancelled

      Much as I enjoy the games, that is something I find really annoying in Fallout. It’s been over a century since the bombs fell, why the hell is everyone still camping out in semi collapsed buildings or shacks made of scrap? No one who knew how to work with wood, cut stone, or make a brick survived?

      • UnCivilServant

        I seem to recall the tribals had their own structures built from raw materials. It’s just the folk clinging to the past that are huddled in the ruins – and that seems to be a disproportionate number of the non-raiders.

      • Cancelled

        There was one tribe that lived in yurts and another I can remember that lived in huts. I don’t regard that as really any different than the scrap shacks.

      • UnCivilServant

        Why? It’s the scrap shackers who are trying to emulate the prewar world. If the tribals went “We can survive this way” and didn’t need to immediately attempt to return to what was, especially when the ability to relocate helps to cope with the reality of raider migrations, what’s so ‘wrong’ about it?

      • Cancelled

        the fact that after three generations no one is building houses? You don’t find that at all unlikely?

      • UnCivilServant

        If you grew up in a nomadic tribe and all the settled peoples were suffering or murderous, what appeal would there be to changing your ways to emulate those worse off?

      • Cancelled

        The ability to actually have food? The ability to build fortifications to defend against the raiders? Nomadic tribes are either hunter gatherers (which would be impossible in the Fallout wastelands) or herdsmen (and they do not seem to have herds). I am kind of shocked that the guy who researches details like the percentage of various geographies that can be used for farming doesn’t find the complete lack of world building in Fallout a bit jarring.

      • UnCivilServant

        I seem to recall that they did have herds, and a lot of the land is unsuitable for farming.

        Lore wise I believe the big advantage of the Brahmin was its ability to handle mildly irradiated feed stock and produce less-irradiated milk and meat (however that was supposed to work, but biology was never the series’ strong suit).

        Fortifications are not necessary to deal with raiders, and require a lot more resources. In fact, sitting in one place would be disadvantageous for getting food because of the poor yields evidenced in most of the environments of the setting.

      • Agent Cooper

        I don’t play the game — what is the major religion? If it is animism or something like that, the people will live in huts forever.

      • UnCivilServant

        Religions vary.

        The only two I recall in detail is the cult of the Atom… where the adherents intentionally irradiate themselves (with all the side effects that entails) and Hubology, where the adherents are trying to get into space (but was started as a fraud).

      • Cancelled

        The dominant religion generally seems to be worship of the Holy Atom, lol. The world building is pitiful. The games themselves are very enjoyable.

      • UnCivilServant

        The Church of Atom is a fringe group, and far from dominant

      • Cancelled

        Also the more I think about this the less sense your responses make UCS. Who is nomadic? Caesar’s crew are, but everyone else seems to live in settlements that are made of scrap or semicollapsed buildings. I’m sticking with my position of build a damn house and stop living in a crumbling school or town hall.

      • Cancelled

        It is widespread and we meet more adherents of it than all other religions I can recall in the games combined.

      • UnCivilServant

        What’s really unlikely is that none of these empty buildings have been disassembled for parts. It’s what happens everywhere else.

        As for religion, most characters don’t follow any faiths as far as can be observed.

        I have a meeting to get to 🙁 So enjoy someone else’s theories on why the setting is still stuck as if it’s five days after the bombs fell.

      • pistoffnick

        “The Church of Atom is a fringe group, and far from dominant”

        So you are saying they are splitters?

      • pan fried wylie

        they do not seem to have herds

        I didn’t play. Did they have herds or not. I could see it being a programming/resource challenge for the first few installments.

      • Nephilium

        There was quite a bit of world building in the first two Fallout games. It was collected and released as the Fallout Bible.

        Again, Bethesda shit the bed by jumping forward 100 years for the games from 3 onward.

      • UnCivilServant

        @jar – I actually agree with you that by 2287 there should have been few recognizable landmarks and most of the structures should have been those built within those centuries, I just like to argue.

      • Cancelled

        @UCS, I know! Seriously, I am doing the same thing, arguing about something that does not matter at all because then I can stop feeding the ball of rage that grows every time I argue about stuff that does matter.

      • Mojeaux

        feeding the ball of rage that grows every time I argue about stuff that does matter.

        Internet gonna internet.

      • Nephilium

        That’s really more of an issue in the Bethesda Fallout games. Between Fallout 1 and Fallout 2, there was advancements in the settlements, and more technology being brought back. The first two games were also set closer to the war. Bethesda decided to jump over a hundred years in the future, just so they could use the same factions as the earlier games (who were in California).

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Maybe a combination of hair care products, think-piece generation, fruit sushi consumption, and the ability to reflexively write “to be sure” have anti-radiological effects. Would explain the complete and utter lack of manual skill in the ensuing population.

  13. Tundra

    So, I took the plunge and cancelled my cable tv. After not turning the fucking thing on for more than 3 months, the kids leaving for school and my disgust with the NHL, I figured wtf am I paying for exactly?

    One of my TVs is smart, the other is dumb. Any opinions on boxes for the dumb one in case I want to Netflix/Hulu/whatever?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Roku

    • Sean

      No love for Amazon’s FireStick?

    • Nephilium

      If you’re already on the Android train, the Chromecast’s aren’t bad. You control it from your phone. Off the top of my head, the only streaming service that doesn’t work with it is Amazon, because they want you to go with their Fire stick.

      • Chipwooder

        You can still use it with Prime Video by casting your device screen to the TV. Picture’s not quite as good, but good enough as far as I’m concerned.`

      • Nephilium

        It also means you need to keep your device running and screen up. And if you have autorotate on, watching the image bounce around can cause issues as well. Which reminds me of another app you need to cast the screen for… NFL app for watching games.

      • Chipwooder

        True. I just keep mine plugged in on the end table when I do that.

      • gbob

        Chromecast now works with Prime. Made my life much easier.

    • DOOMco

      We have a fire stick, it works pretty good.
      Downstairs we just use the PlayStation?
      Kind of an expensive Hulu slave, to be honest.
      At least my nhl game doesn’t have the issues the NHL does.

    • R C Dean

      We Appled.

      Pros: it works really well. Sound and video quality are noticeably better than satellite.

      Cons: Not cheap. Not a fan of the fiddle little remote.

      • I'm Here To Help

        We have 4 Apple TVs in our house. Going to get at least one more when the parents move in, but most likely two more for them. Love the AppleTV. Had Roku on a smart TV, never really got the hang of it.

        We have Netflix, Amazon Prime, and AT&T Now for the regular TV, and all are right there on the Apple TV. They are expensive, but seem to be much more stable than the Roku was. Audio/Video are good, especially from the 4k one we have on the main TV.

      • Agent Cooper

        Apple TV 4K on the big TV in the family room. Rokus on all of the smaller TVs upstairs. Xbox/Smart TV combo in the rec room in the basement.

        I like the Apple system the best, but the Roku works just fine.

      • Agent Cooper

        Also! We have Spectrum streaming with our internet for about $120/mo. That’s 125 channels and pretty much all of the sports. Free HBO and Showtime for awhile too.

    • Drake

      Our Blu-Ray player has most of the streaming services, built it.

      • Mojeaux

        ^^^^ This.

    • blighted_non_millenial

      Firestick, here. We have a 4k (not exactly a stick but it’s not the full on Firebox) and a non-4k.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      My experience with cutting the cable (going on 4 years now) has been mostly positive.

      Amazon versus Roku is fairly even. I’d give a slight edge to Amazon on available content, if only because they have an inbuilt browser. The roku smart tvs seem a bit more stable than the fire stick we have, but the fire TV we have (mentioned above) has been rock solid.

      If you want sports but dont want to pay for a sports service, some of the antenna DVRs are decent. We have a Tablo, and it’s okay. It struggles with weak signal, and has a few quirks, but I’ve watched TV from my antenna while waiting in the airport to board a flight, so there are some nice features, too.

      • Tundra

        Thanks, all!

        Looks like there are no shortage of options!

    • Hyperion

      I have the Fire TV Stick. Works. I don’t watch TV.

  14. PieInTheSky

    so timberwolves won the lottery… for what it’s worth…

    • Swiss Servator

      Bah!

      Chicago gets #4 when only 1-3 mean anything. Proves the thing isn’t rigged …. #7 last year, #4 this year. Another wasted year in the #3 market.

      • Cancelled

        You had your run. I’d be sympathetic about it except I live in Cincinnati and our glory days ended long before yours did.

    • Pope Jimbo

      My son talked my ear off about it last night. He’s still a True Believer in all teams Minnesoda, so he was making all sorts of GM trades last night or toying with getting the kid from Memphis and going Twin Towers Part 2.

      When he was going over the possibilities, I realized it was the first time in months I had paid any attention to sports.

      The Altar Boy was nearly as excited about the Knicks getting screwed over again as he was about the T-woofs getting the #1 pick.

      • UnCivilServant

        I am terribly out of touch with sportsball.

        Whenever I see ‘Timberwolf’ I instinctively want to respond with “It’s a MadCat, you vat-grown clanner scum.”

    • Chipwooder

      I don’t think the Knicks have ever moved up in the lottery. Not since Ewing, anyway. They always, always drop. Just another reason for me to despise the NBA.

    • invisible finger

      The Timberwolves are under tremendous pressure to draft a black guy.

      • juris imprudent

        True diversity would be a short, fat, slow Asian dude (of dubious dude-ness).

  15. Fourscore

    “Death and destruction on a grand scale, mayhem, looting, rats (lots and lots of rats!), feral dogs”

    So, Chicago on a typical weekend?

    • Fourscore

      Brooks, @ # 13

    • Swiss Servator

      Nah, dogs only on the South and West side. The rest….sure.

      • pistoffnick

        +5 Puerto Rican girls that are just DYING to meet you!

      • Festus' Mustache

        I know there are lots of solid people there but for fuck’s sake, cut and run if you can, Friend! I can’t decide just who is the most evil mayor in America but the one with the “Innsmouth Look” is hovering at the top.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Any opinions on boxes for the dumb one in case I want to Netflix/Hulu/whatever?

    I’m pretty happy with my roku.

    I watch a lot of youtube videos on it.

  17. Festus' Mustache

    Good God. Steve Bannon looks like me after a coke bender with a bunch of peelers. They actually think that jail would be an apt punishment? That dude needs a hospice and an intervention.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Sorry. Mornin’ Banjos!

      • Banjos

        Mornin’

    • Hyperion

      The looks like a meth head on vodka.

  18. Pope Jimbo

    Behold! The new frontier in mask shaming.

    Wearing a mask in public restrooms should be mandatory during the pandemic, researchers say, because there’s increasing evidence that flushing toilets – and now urinals – can release inhalable coronavirus particles into the air.

    The coronavirus can be found in a person’s urine or stool, and flushing urinals can generate an “alarming upward flow” of particles that “travel faster and fly farther” than particles from a toilet flush, according to a study published in the journal Physics of Fluid Monday.

    “Urinal flushing indeed promotes the spread of bacteria and viruses,” researcher Xiangdong Liu said in a press release. “Wearing a mask should be mandatory within public restrooms during the pandemic, and anti-diffusion improvements are urgently needed to prevent the spread of COVID-19.”

    And once again, it is a study where they “simulated” urinal flushing with a computer model. So no actual testing with an actual real urinal.

    • LJW

      Still waiting for a peer reviewed study that proves basic masks offer any protection from viruses.

      • Rebel Scum

        The mask and virus have the same relationship as a chain-link fence and a mosquito.

        Urinal flushing indeed promotes the spread of bacteria and viruses

        I’ll never flush again.

      • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

        I wasn’t planning on starting now anyway.

      • Hyperion

        We don’t have time for that non-sense, we have a bad orange man to get rid of.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Speaking of toilets, now is the time for Straff to show off that Wisconsin Whitesnake

      It sounds like the worst kind of anxiety dream – a public toilet cubicle that appears to offer the promise of blessed relief, but which on closer inspection turns out to be entirely see-through.

      That, though, is the design feature behind several toilets that recently opened in public parks in Tokyo.

      The “transparent” toilets, created by the Pritzker prize-winning architect Shigeru Ban and more than a dozen other leading designers, are made from coloured “smart glass” that turns opaque when the cubicles are occupied.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Bruh, the walls aren’t there to protect me from you when I’m shitting. They are for protecting you from me.

      • Nephilium

        Or they’ll bring back the troughs, no flushing for those.

      • Pope Jimbo

        You guys don’t need to argue. You can both be right. Mandatory sitting down in the trough.

      • l0b0t

        Many places in NOLA still have them. One of my many chores at the bar was to keep it full of ice.

      • AlexinCT

        Had a couple of ex girlfriends try that…..

        That’s one of the main reasons they are exes too. You think you are being nice. They see it as weakness and a sign they will be able to “mold” you into whatever they think you should be.

      • Agent Cooper

        I pee sitting down at home. I’m Larry David.

    • ruodberht

      Believing that coronavirus causes a deadly murder tornado of instant destruction is an IQ test. And, as before, those wearing the masks have failed that test.

    • kbolino

      The only thing wearing a cloth mask will do in the bathroom is keep a nice, warm, moist environment for the bacteria to grow on right in front of your face. As anyone who’s had to wear one of these stupid talismans into the bathroom at the office can attest, it does fuck all about smells, and if you can smell it then you are already inhaling it.

      • kbolino

        (of course, coronavirus is not a form of bacteria, but the point stands)

      • Cancelled

        and viruses only reproduce inside living cells…

      • kbolino

        Yeah, this is what happens when you try to word things without deep understanding. I am no biologist. Nevertheless, “studies have shown” that the virus lives a lot longer (whatever that means) on a mask being worn than on an unworn piece of cloth or paper. Does that mean it is still infectious? Does that mean it is infectious only to touch, only by inhalation, by both or other means? I don’t know.

        So, this may or may not translate into a greater infection risk. The only way to prove the hypothesis that masks prevent or reduce transmission in the bathroom is to have an observational study (or ten) of two similarly situated populations, with known existing positive case rates, one masked and one unmasked, and then wait a while and see if the virus spreads more to one group or the other.

        Any test of a hypothesis for a causal mechanism in isolation proves only so much. And a model, moreover, is just an advanced hypothesis; no matter what the result of a model is, it is not a substitute for experimentation.

    • Rhywun

      Today in “we heard this three months ago”.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Non-lidded toilets have been known for years to create what the literature loving refers to as “bacteria and fecal plumes”. This is just the Ministry of Goodthink applying old results to the pressing current day needs of the party.

      • l0b0t

        IIRC, Mythbusters did a bit about fecal coliform and its presence on toothbrushes. Apparently, the state of the lid while flushing makes no appreciable difference and every surface in the bathroom has fecal coliform on it.

      • UnCivilServant

        I remember another test with air dryers for hands… those things spread germs far and wide. (especially when compared to pwper towels)

      • Rhywun

        I’m glad those things seem to be dying out – always hated them, and not because of “germs” but because they don’t work.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        *remembers that our evolutionary environment was full of shit in drinking water and on all surfaces* *doesn’t get worried about it*

        IIRC, the plume is concentrated when airborne, and then distributes through the room. The suggestion I remember is just to put the lid down if you are the type to bend over the pot when you reach to flush. Or just flush with your foot if you are in public. And the only concern is poop that’s been infested with poop-born bacteria

    • Fatty Bolger

      can release inhalable coronavirus particles into the air

      Which will go right through a typical mask. This is dumb even by dumb mask study standards.

    • B.P.

      I’ve been told, over and over, that one wears the mask to reduce transmission to others, not necessarily to avoid contracting coronavirus. So, in this case, one wears the mask in a public restroom to avoid infecting a toilet, I guess.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    And once again, it is a study where they “simulated” urinal flushing with a computer model. So no actual testing with an actual real urinal.

    How did our species ever make it this far? We should have died out thousands of years ago.

    • Pope Jimbo

      We didn’t have computers until just recently and people actually had to run actual experiments. Someone would have had to rig up an actual urinal with a bunch of sensors, do a lot of flushing and handle lots of collection pads covered with piss. So yeah, typical scientist guy would have skipped the whole thing.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        who settles on this as a project? “i need to put together an idea for a grant proposal in the field of fluid dynamics. Oh, I’ve got it! lets model a urinal and see how much it splashes!”

        This is a Jackson pollock of scientific research.

      • pan fried wylie

        UV lights, photos, pressure washer.

    • juris imprudent

      We’ve always had soothsayers – back in olden days they would consult an oracle like a freshly disemboweled chicken; these days it is a bunch of computer code, that greatly resembles the disemboweled guts of a chicken.

  20. Rhywun

    Taco Bell Go Mobile locations will feature contactless curbside pickup

    You can’t fight the new normal.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Sure you can. Just ignore them.

      • Rhywun

        That’s not a very social attitude, citizen.

        #alonetogether

      • TARDIS

        #pissedofftogether

  21. Festus' Mustache

    Dammit Banjos, you are in my head!

  22. The Late P Brooks

    There’s Joe again: “We’ll never get our lives back, until we get control of the virus White House.”

    • Festus' Mustache

      As mentioned in the dead thread – “CBC calls Biden’s Speech a Revelation” because he never asked for Mommy to wipe his bum.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    Taco Bell Go Mobile locations will feature contactless curbside pickup

    A taco cannon?

    • Tres Cool

      I knew a woman in college we nicknamed “taco cannon”

  24. Rebel Scum

    “Joe Biden has taken on the NRA twice and won. And he will do it again as president.”

    If he won why are these super scary “assault weapons” still available (and flying off the shelves…)?

    And I am still trying to figure out what an “assault weapon” is. Seems to me that the modifier describes an action, not an object.

    • Festus' Mustache

      To me an assault weapon could be as simple as a spade or my fists and feet.

      • Tres Cool

        #WeaponizedMustache

    • ruodberht

      A bayonet lug is one of the features that made something an assault weapon in the AWB. You know how Portland is suffering an epidemic of bayonet charges? That’s what we’re fighting against, you gun nut.

    • kbolino

      This doesn’t make any sense unless you think of the NRA as a mythical boogeyman. Biden was a Senator, the NRA holds no elected office. You’d have to be an idiot to find that phrasing convincing.

      Oh, right…

    • Hyperion

      We’ve discussed these assault weapons enough around here, everyone should know what it is. It’s a semi-automatic rifle with a detachable magazine. Like all of them. Except it looks more scarier, is black, and has a thing that goes up. And despite all of that almost normal rifle stuff, it sprays bullets like eleventylevengazillion miles a second and rains death from above, and it comes from Indiana.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    We didn’t have computers until just recently and people actually had to run actual experiments. Someone would have had to rig up an actual urinal with a bunch of sensors, do a lot of flushing and handle lots of collection pads covered with piss. So yeah, typical scientist guy would have skipped the whole thing.

    They might even have made an honest attempt to determine what constitutes a “lethal” dose of the pathogen itself, instead of assuming it to be 100% fatal in any mount.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Or maybe do something that’s I dunno, Sciency?

  26. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Freaky Friday: Ewwwww……

    • Festus' Mustache

      Don’t judge me! Don’t you dare judge!

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      that’s…. about what I would expect if I just saw the guy and didn’t know how much money he has likely made.

    • Rhywun

      I honestly thought he was on that show Hoarders.

      Fun fact: he HAS been on Hoarders.

      As the pal of some flaky old Hollywood hoarder gal.

      • Rhywun

        In other words there was no indication that he is a hoarder himself.

    • Fourscore

      Needs a “Rent-A-Maid” to come in once a week and straighten up his pad. Typical man cave.

      • Hyperion

        When I was single, people who came to my house would ask me if I’m gay because my house was so clean and organized. I can’t stand cluttered messy house. It’s not that much work when you don’t have kids in your house.

      • Brochettaward

        I would have thought all the dick sucking would have been the red flag.

      • Fourscore

        We are clean but messy. Too much stuff, too little space to hide it. A serious first world problem. How many coats/jackets does a lady need? I’m not sure but it must be one more.

        Boots for men, lemme see, need shoe pacs for hunting, heavy insulated boots (1200 gram) for ice fishing, 8oo gram for cold weather walking/working, rubber for concrete work, leather for summer woods projects, they take space not available in a closet ’cause that where some (a lot) of the lady shoes go.

        When I was working we said if a box of merchandise stayed on the floor overnight it became invisible. I often carried 1/2 full boxes back to the sorting room when I saw no one was working that project.

        /nothoarding

      • B.P.

        I’ve seen that Ron Jeremy movie.

  27. Rebel Scum

    “We have to have a buyback program and I support a mandatory gun buyback program,”

    Still using this misnomer, I see. I will happily sell to the government any firearms I purchased from the government.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Sure. Buy it back but I get to set the price. A billion apiece in bit-coin or gold standard. Non-negotiable. FOS

    • Brett L

      I have 3 inoperable firearms inherited from my FIL. $300 each will get me a new operating gun.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        That’ll get you nine hunit dolla problem salvas

      • Viking1865

        Yeah these morons have no idea how many busted up old guns can be had for 200 bucks or less on the used rack.

  28. Pope Jimbo

    The DNC should have hired this Brazilian consultant to make their zoom convention more compelling.

    This is the moment one of the participants of a Zoom meeting forgot to turn his camera off and was caught having sex in the background.

    The meeting was chaired by a member of the Socialism and Liberty Party, Leonel Brizola, who continued the discussion despite the scenes being relayed through the video feed.

    It was a meeting for the Rio de Janeiro city council, which local newspaper Metropoles reported was about how to guarantee food for students in the municipal system during the pandemic.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Did you pay no attention at all over at TOS? Socialism and Libertarianism are natural allies.

      • robc

        They are, in voluntary communes like kibbutzim.

      • kbolino

        To revive an old discussion, a kibbutz is compatible with thin libertarianism, but I don’t know that it would still be compatible with thick libertarianism. If everybody’s raised to believe small, voluntary communes are acceptable then the society continues with communists and non-communists at peace. If the members of the kibbutz are raised to believe that small, voluntary communes are being forced upon them by capitalist oppressors and the world would be better off with a single large involuntary commune then all bets are off.

      • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

        What about thicc libertarianism?

      • Don did not Escape Bama

        For me libertarianism is only how I vote: it’s a position on what I think government should be, how it should treat me and others.

        When I leave the voting booth, I’m boring old humanist Don. I have no opinion about my neighbor’s favorite chemicals or his living in sin with two goats.

        As long as my property and my person isn’t assaulted, I basically don’t care about anything, especially kibbutzim.

      • Rebel Scum

        *mixes oil and water*

        Hm. Doesn’t seem to work.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Gotta put it in a blender and leave it on.

      • UnCivilServant

        You guys all forget the emulsifier.

      • kbolino

        I am willing to entertain the notion that a socialist-lite government can be respective of personal liberty but I have yet to see any evidence that a socialist-lite government respects even the most basic right of the people, that of self-defense.

      • Viking1865

        I think the only way you could get that is a computer administered straight up redistribution of wealth type system.

        There’s 17.6 trillion in US income a year. Flat tax of 20% on all income gets you 3.52 trillion in federal revenue.

        Then you take that 3.52 trillion, and you earmark 50% of it to be distributed, as cash payments, to the poorest 40 million households in the nation. That’s an additional 44,000 dollars in the pocket of the poorest 30% of the country. This would replace all welfare programs, including Social Security and Medicare. If there is a genuinely poor old person, they fall into the 30%. No more giving well established retirees fun money because “They Paid In”.

      • juris imprudent

        No more giving well established retirees fun money because “They Paid In”.

        MUH SOSHUL CONTRACT!1!!

      • kbolino

        Computers are only as good as the algorithms they’re programmed to execute, and those algorithms are only as good as the data they’re given as input. Put another way, there’s no computer system that can replace human judgment, and there is no computer system immune to human judgment either. There’s an entire field of study known as algorithmic bias or machine bias which looks into how computers can show bias. This bias, itself defined by human prejudices, ranges from benign(-ish) things like resolving the adult-Asians-look-like-white-babies problem (a possible result of facial recognition algorithms when the training data does not have sufficient representative samples for a particular ethnic group; there are other, more politically incorrect related problems) to more controversial things like judgments made about creditworthiness, recidivism, healthcare costs, etc.

        Put yet another way, there is no computer system that won’t just become an automated form of the same messy culturally driven government we have today.

      • pan fried wylie

        Computers are only as good as the algorithms they’re programmed to execute

        Viking just listed the algorithms. Flat tax, flat distribution.

      • R C Dean

        I’m not seeing how socialism of any weight is compatible with property rights.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        it’s really a measure of degree. On one side is every real world attempt at full on communism. On the other side is a hypothetical country where the only step away from libertopia is some magical tax plan that generates a large amount of revenue without murdering the economy and distributes it magically to those who need it most without graft and without inefficiency. IOW, a pipe dream.

      • kbolino

        Yep. And actual governments that have come somewhat close to this pipe dream have always disarmed the populace along the way.

      • Hyperion

        Brazil has like 6000 political parties. Most of them are just the same lefties with different names.

  29. Rufus the Monocled

    Leaving aside at being appalled by how school reopening is being dealt with (my wife told me her school won’t allow fridges or microwaves to be used. It’s amazing how we get into a micro-managing funk to try and ‘stop the spread’ for something you can’t stop from spreading. Anyway, we’ve been using the fridge and microwave since we opened in June…..no problem. Very stupid people I keep repeating are in charge. Peter Principle/Dunning-Kruger effect abounds.), if we’re really, really, really, intelligent and have courage we realize kids are potentially the perfect vector to get us to herd immunity and speed up the virus’s burn out. It sounds like they’re largely safe from the virus and are asymptomatic silent spreaders and there’s not a single thing we can do about that unless we quarantine them indefinitely in cages.

    Interestingly, influenza is the opposite dilemma and is far more dangerous to them. Buckle up buckaroos shit’s about to get fun. We have to stay the course and ride through it. No closures, no shut downs. Yukon Ho!

    • robc

      My daughter’s school opened this week. The pickup and drop off procedure is better than before. I hope they keep it, minus the temperature at the door, post covid.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        There are positives. We put out a sink outside. By doing that, the kids come in clean as opposed in the past they had to walk through the daycare dirty. Now we can prep them outside during nice temperatures. That happened with us too. We bring the child out to the parents. Before it was a messy free for all especially in winter. Parents also tended to linger around talking to one another. Now it’s take your stuff and go. But it loses a bit of its familial charm I suppose.

        But we’re not out of the woods yet business wise. I’m worried. I always worry.

      • Fourscore

        A good businessman is always worried.

    • Festus' Mustache

      That there is the problem. In the before times people of a certain mind-set could just pull up stakes and vamoose West. We’re trapped in the Skinner Box and rats end up eating each other if left to their own devices.

  30. Rebel Scum

    U.S. weekly jobless claims jump back above 1 million

    Kovid Karen governors are certainly doing their damnedest to kill the economy.

    • Hyperion

      Commie flu will go away the morning of Nov 4 if bad orange man loses. Otherwise it will be around for at least 4 more years.

      There are some things you can predict as surely as the sun coming up in the morning again. And that’s one of them.

  31. robc

    I realized that I have now been working from home longer at my current job than from the office.

    5 months in office, 5 months and a week at home.

    • Brett L

      I guess I technically started working from the office when I started my own business in June with my home as the business address. Before that, I hadn’t had an assigned seat or regular time to appear in an office since 2016. I’m counter-culture!

    • J. Frank Parnell

      I thought everyone in Sweden was dead because they didn’t shut down everything.

  32. Rufus the Monocled

    Apparently the CDC or FDA (I forget) are preventing plasma transfusions which were effective. citing there’s no empirical evidence and more research is needed.

    Hm. Sounds like they played this racket with HCQ. Needs more evidence. Meanwhile, the former technique has been used since the Spanish flu and the latter for over 60 years. Both work.

    BUT, they don’t need empirical evidence for mandatory mass mask usage. That apparently comes with no potential consequences.

    Something is rotten in Denmark.

    • Not Adahn

      Hakarl?

    • Pope Jimbo

      What is astounding to me is that these treatments have been around and have no known negative consequences, but still are being banned for some reason.

      Why? It isn’t like these are some totally new treatments that have never been tried, or have been tried and have all sorts of horrible side effects.

      I’m now pissed that Trump didn’t suggest masks early on. That would have rendered all mask mandates moot.

      • kbolino

        To be fair, it is difficult to anticipate what irrational panic will lead to.

      • invisible finger

        “Ugly broads like Hilary Clinton should wear masks as they are the most susceptible to the virus. I mean, have you seen the people dropping dead in New York nursing homes? Half of them are ugly broads. So ugly I wouldn’t even fuck them with Rachel Maddow’s dick.”

      • Hyperion

        If Trump even says anything positive about anything, that thing will suddenly be very bad and dangerous. He could say that drinking 8 glasses of water is good for you and for the next month CNN will air experts warning about how dangerous drinking water is and how it should be banned.

      • pan fried wylie

        Dude, shut the fuck up, we need water.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Are they blocking the experiments as well?

      Because I know the Mayo Clinic is asking for plasma donations for that purpose.

    • Drake

      Imagine if there was a real epidemic as deadly as bubonic plague. These assholes would kill millions to maintain their authority, pharma profits, and help their political friends.

      Every one of them and every Dem Governor should be forced to take a weekly piss test for hydroxychloroquine.

    • Florida Man

      It is not really a ban as much as a pause while they review the data. My hospital system is still using convalescence plasma to treat patients, 450 treated with success and is asking anyone who has recovered from COVID-19 to donate. Other good news is that 80 percent of Covid positive people can be treated at home and lasting immunity appears to be gained by people with even mild symptoms. Florida has passed the peak and numbers are dropping. If herd immunity is gained at 10-20 percent instead of 50-60, we should nearly be done with this nonsense.

      • Florida Man

        It’s most likely political or to make sure this pandemic last long enough to sell vaccines. Convalescence plasma is safe and according to information I have is effective. The official reason is that there hasn’t been a double blind study performed yet to prove effectiveness, so the emergency order is being suspended.

      • Akira

        It keeps saying that the antibodies last “at least three months”, which is interesting because all I hear from the Branch Covidians (who outsource all their thinking to CNN and NYT) is that “they only last three months”.

        Just like how some study came out showing that the virus “can survive on surfaces for up to 3 days” made everyone think that every single surface will harbor the virus for 72 hours when in reality, they got it to survive for 3 days in highly specific laboratory conditions. It doesn’t mean it’s going to live that long in the real world.

        It’s like reading that humans have lived up to 126 years of age, then assuming that every single person will in fact live that long.

    • pan fried wylie

      Look, plasma transfusions have to be banned or else people will start injecting ionized noble gasses and solar wind and where will we be then, huh, SMARTGAIS?!

  33. Nephilium

    Rhywun, in this week’s new shortage:

    Pepperoni and cheese are getting into short supply.

    • Not Adahn

      If my local pizzeria is any indication, pepperoni demand is also down. A whole, untouched pie sitting there while people ordered slices from all of the others.

      • Rhywun

        Good. Pepperoni is the only pizza I eat. Mostly make my own, though.

    • leon

      First governments ban work, now there are shortages. who could have seen this coming?

    • Sean

      Shit’s getting real, yo.

  34. creech

    Just read that there’s a kids book out by Simon & Schuster: “Kamala Harris” Rooted in Justice.” WTF? Buying that crap for your kid should be child abuse.

    • leon

      I’m not sure what i find more off putting about the Coronoavirus debacle. The fact that the leadership exempts themselves from the rules they make for little people (No-mask-fauci at a baseball game) or the smug masses, assured that they are so smart because they are doing what they have been told to do.

      • Festus' Mustache

        I won’t bend the knee. I’m not desperate or homeless but I’ve got little to lose. My best days are behind me, I work a menial job and never had any children of my own. Bring it.

      • AlexinCT

        I was in for a colonoscopy yesterday and talked to 2 doctors, an anesthesiologist, and three nurses, and to a one, when you finally got them to talk without holding back because they are worried you are trying to fuck them over for admitting we are being screwed, they told me that they find all this stuff they are doing futile. That’s because until we shit the focus to getting herd immunity (and then, by protecting those at risk and letting others get the Kung Flu), this charade will not come to an end. No amount of social distancing and PPE will stop this, and a vaccine is iffy at best as a solution.

        Of course, if Biden manages to win the election, all this bullshit will go away…

      • leon

        No, no, Fauci has said that Herd Immunity is unpossible, and would kill millions upon millions of people in the US alone.

      • AlexinCT

        This stuff will sort itself out then when the economy collapses. Maybe we will be living in waterworld after all.

      • Festus' Mustache

        Damn, Alex. Sorry to hear. Three Up-thumbs, Buddy!

      • Fourscore

        The good news is that when you hit 75 something else will probably get you before the colon cancer. No more colonoscopies for me. Once you’ve reached the “Best Used Date” you can relax.

      • AlexinCT

        It was just a routine scan, all went well I can report, and I will have to go back in another five years for my third go around with the expensive up the ass scan. Not that I enjoy this sort of shit (that prep and the fact I had to go take a COVID test sucked), but I lost a nephew at the age of 33 to colon cancer, so I take this shit real serious.

        Anyway, some people are doing the herd immunity thing, and in the end, they will be leaps and bounds ahead of us because of that…

    • AlexinCT

      Cults have to cult, man…

      • DOOMco

        They even have the whole kill potential leaders to try to prevent schisms!

      • Festus' Mustache

        Uh-oh, somebody has strayed from the syllabus.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Slave Labor and Sucking Cock, My Personal Struggle

      • AlexinCT

        Are you having to do the slave labor sucking? Or are you advocating for a slave cock sucking class?

      • Festus' Mustache

        I don’t know. I can’t live in Kamala’s head.

    • Pope Jimbo

      It might not be completely full of shit. If it had been titled Kamala Harris: Rooted for Justice then you would know that there wasn’t a shred of truth in it.

      • Festus' Mustache

        ^ Nice!

      • Fourscore

        “Kamala Harris, Rooting for Justice”

        Now re-written in the present tense

    • Rhywun

      The videos of schoolchildren singing paeans to her can’t be far behind.

      • leon

        Singing and spreading Covid?!

      • Rhywun

        Finally a reason to open the schools back up.

      • Mojeaux

        People here are pissed off. They do not care about COVID. They care about their kids’ future sports scholarships and the years of effort, time, and money that went into making an athlete.

      • Rhywun

        People are pissed off everywhere for every reason. The media are doing their best to suppress it, of course.

      • WTF

        “MMMMMMM MMMMMM MMMMMM!”

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      “Rooted in Justice”. Why would they write a kids book about her affair with Willy Brown?

  35. The Late P Brooks

    Joe: “I’m not looking to punish anybody.”

    But those corporations need to pay their fair share. Or else.

  36. Rebel Scum

    She said while looking like an evil witch.

    When asked about former officials no longer supporting Trump, Clinton said, “I think if we can somehow get the message across that these men and they’re predominantly men, not exclusively, have served our country in peace and war. They have been in that situation room. They have been confronted with the kind of really difficult choices that a president or a national security adviser or joint chiefs of staff or defense secretary has to understand and then decide about and they’re worried about Donald Trump because as bad as Trump has been for the last three and a half years I don’t know what would happen to our country in terms of the danger to America, the danger to our economy, the danger to our interests around the world if he had no accountability staring him in the face at all. So I think it’s important.” …

    She continued, “Every American should ask him or herself, you know, do you want a country where your president admires someone who kills, literally kills, his opposition? Now, and we have heard nothing. We have heard nothing from Mike Pompeo. We have heard nothing from the White House. And it is a demonstration of the moral bankruptcy but also the clear and present danger that the Trump administration poses to our freedoms, to our values. I am really concerned that more people in our country are not understanding what has happened elsewhere in the world that Trump seems to admire. What would stop him from going even further than he has if given the chance.”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Trump not siccing the justice dept on her was the worst decision of his presidency. She’s just terrible and now we might get the former prosecutor version of Her Shrillness.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        He should have gone in for the kill.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Trump’s too nice. He talks a good game but it’s mostly bluster, at least when it comes to his domestic opponents. Speak loudly and carry a small stick just doesn’t cut it.

      • kbolino

        If you used your fingers, you could count the number of GS-15s who would go after Clinton under orders from Trump or his appointed AG on zero hands.

    • Festus' Mustache

      I’ll just refer you to Sugarfree’s Canon. That’s pretty much how loathsome she is. These last four days have been like living in cloud cuckoo land. The Jamie Gumm impersonator? Come on, Man…

  37. DOOMco

    Yesterday I come home from work and see my daughter crawl over, crouch and then stand up. Holding nothing.

    So I got that going for me

    • Ownbestenemy

      Fantastic! Its the little things in life.

    • TARDIS

      The next thing you know, she’ll be driving to the store to pick up some White Claw.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        LOL

      • Sean

        What Scruffy said.

    • Festus' Mustache

      That’s wonderful! This week I got to watch 10 Lab puppies chasing kids around the yard. Kinda the same vibe.

    • Pope Jimbo

      So teen age drinking has hit your house?

      • DOOMco

        The mess sure looks like it.

      • Festus' Mustache

        Babies are shit and clutter machines. So let it be written, so let it be known.

      • Mojeaux

        (Some) teenagers are hoarding machines. For a parent who likes to throw shit out and empty cabinets are bliss, this is maddening.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Toddlers are random distribution machines.

        Where are my car keys? Shit the 2 year-old got hold of them. Who knows where they are now? He carried them around until he spotted something new and dropped them.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        Reminds me of a video I saw (maybe AFV?). Toddler got ahold of dad’s wallet, and all the cards were gone once dad found out.

        Turns out the kid had been putting them in the slots in the HVAC vent.

      • Sensei

        My mother gave me her wallet to play with for whatever reason when I was child.

        This was in the good old days so I was riding unbelted in the front seat of their new car. I inserted it into the dashboard HVAC vent.

        From that point onward any time you put the fan speed to high the card would make a clicking sound in the vent.

    • l0b0t

      That’s wonderful; watching them meet then excel at the developmental milestones is such an amazing thing.

    • Cancelled

      Hmm, so she is going to do this life playthrough as a stealth character? Buy her a good bow early on!

      • DOOMco

        Lol

    • Drake

      Would you know there was a “pandemic” happening if the media didn’t tell you?

      • Festus' Mustache

        I know of no one dropping dead or even getting sidelined. Judi had a really bad cold back in January and I had sniffles for a day or two. It seems to pass over people that are fit and get the co-morbids. Lucky for us I painted the door with menstrual blood…

      • Fourscore

        We skipped epidemic, went straight to pandemic ’cause that is way scarier sounding

      • Tejicano

        Sometimes I wonder if they didn’t call it a plague because that doesn’t sound sciencey enough.

      • Florida Man

        It’s a technical term that is being used correctly. COVID-19 is occurring on multiple continents. Pandemic doesn’t mean worse than epidemic, it just means more widespread.

      • EvilSheldon

        The root of ‘pandemic’ is ‘panic’, so…

  38. leon

    https://www.thetrafalgargroup.org/news/mn-pres-0820/

    Damn Third Parties! We should make them illegal so that they are forced to vote for one of our parties!

    Yesterday i saw a “Settle for Biden” ad, which has to be the most condescending ad campaign to try to get progressives/leftists to vote for Biden. In it it compared the Green Party to Joe Biden and literally claimed that they were the same, except that the Green party has not chance, so don’t vote for Trump by voting green. That kind of stuff makes me so upset that i’m willing to vote Jo Jo just as a fuck you to the people who say i’m throwing my vote away to do so.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Sometimes not voting at all is the best option.

    • Festus' Mustache

      Jo-Jo is an idiot.

      • leon

        But its more about saying fuck you to the people who say that by voting for Jo-Jo i’m voting for [Candidate they don’t want to win]

      • Florida Man

        But by voting for Jo you send the signal you want libertarians to Marxist harder.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Look at my story below about Wisconsin denying Kanye a spot on the ballot because he was 14 seconds late.

  39. leon

    Things i was wrong about:

    I knew that it wasn’t going to be “Just 2 weeks”. I didn’t not believe that they would be able to keep up this panic for 6 months.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      The day they locked down I said ‘good luck. Once you traumatize people like it’s game over’. People actually believe this is a viable strategy that worked.

      I prayed the ‘not until a vaccine’ movement would have subsided. It has somewhat but it’s there. I didn’t think the mass mandatory mask thing would take off like it did.

      Get to herd immunity. FAST.

      • invisible finger

        It’s not real herd immunity until the government injects you against your will.

    • Drake

      Three more months to go.

      • Nephilium

        That seems… optimistic.

        The big rockabilly festival I go went to in the before times cancelled this year, and has already postponed next years from the spring to the fall, and it’s still tentative with the fall dates.

      • Festus' Mustache

        This is like a teen boy promising “Just the tip!” and the poor girl having triplets 9 months later.

      • Drake

        Has any girl ever believed that one? Or wanted just the tip?

      • Tejicano

        “Don’t!.. Stop!” – or – “Don’t stop!”

      • Florida Man

        Halloween horror nights was cancelled, but happily Busch gardens don’t care, so howl-o-scream is on and scream-a-geddon. Some local entrepreneur is opening a drive through scare zone called the haunted road. I was pretty bummed when I first heard about HHN, but at least there is a ray of sunshine.

      • Rhywun

        I think he’s referring to November 3rd.

      • Nephilium

        Understood. I just don’t think the lockdowns will be going away then. I really hope I’m wrong, but I also thought this wouldn’t last past Memorial day.

    • leon

      “The buck stops with me, I’m accountable,” he said at a tense news conference, his first appearance since state officials revealed the error. “No one’s trying to hide that, no one’s trying to mask that, we’re owning that, we’re moving forward to address those issues.”

      I love when politicians say “I’m accountable” because what it really means is “look, i’m sorry you caught me. If i recognize that you caught me you have to let it go”. Kinda like Janet Reno accepting “full responsibility” for murder of children at Waco. Um bitch, if you accept responsibility, then why aren’t you being arrested and executed?

      • Chipwooder

        Or, at least, why didn’t she resign? Reno used “I accept full responsibility” the same way Ricky Bobby used “With all due respect”

      • AlexinCT
      • Chipwooder

        It’s in the Geneva Convention, look it up!

      • AlexinCT

        I liked that guy’s wife… She had some spunk when she was in her cups…

        What a beta asshat.

      • Fourscore

        Colin Powell:”They’ve got Weapons of Mass Destruction”

    • Rufus the Monocled

      This kind of behaviour is probably an epidemic during the pandemic.

      People should be outraged of what’s been asked of society but politicians don’t seem to be playing by their own protocols.

      I highly doubt those assholes are ‘masking up’ every chance they get.

    • Rhywun

      So… $210,000 a year.

      Yeah, right.

    • mrfamous

      What amazes me is that the “pay cut” he offered to take is absolutely nothing to him. He’s beyond loaded. There’s only two possibilities:

      1. He’s actually not feasibly capable of actually taking a pay cut. But in which case he could just donate the difference.
      2. He actually wants people to see that he’ll do as he pleases as a display of power.

      Because he can’t possibly need that money. He could donate the entirety of his Governor’s salary and not even notice.

      • CPRM

        he could just donate the difference.

        Like the TYRANT DerDrumfenFarter!?! Who is only president cuz PROFITZ!

  40. The Late P Brooks

    That kind of stuff makes me so upset that i’m willing to vote Jo Jo just as a fuck you to the people who say i’m throwing my vote away to do so.

    You owe it to society to vote for a “real” political party.

  41. Pope Jimbo

    Speaking of more double-think, a great story about Kanye being excluded from WIsconsin’s ballot because the papers were 14 seconds late.

    Commissioner Robert Spindell, a Republican, pushed the panel to give West the benefit of the doubt, saying the pandemic has made life harder and his people might have made it to the commission in time if the building doors had been open. He also argued that Democrats are unfairly trying to keep a Black candidate off the ballot and the commission should give Black voters a choice.

    “We are talking a matter of seconds here,” Spindell said.

    But the rest of the commission said common sense dictates that 5 p.m. is 5 p.m., not 5:00:14.

    “This is one of the closest call cases I’ve seen but consistency requires me to treat all candidates the same, regardless of their party or their color or any other characteristics,” Commissioner Dean Knduson, a Republican, said. “I think the complainants have (presented clear) evidence that he was late.”

    I’ll be disappointed if Trump doesn’t troll the Dems on this. He should make sure to mention that Kanye on the ballot probably hurts him more than Biden because he and Kanye are way closer on criminal justice reform and other issues that help black people.

    • Gustave Lytton

      If you’re serious about actually running, and not just a stunt, why would you wait until literally the last minute to submit paperwork? This smells like staged performance.

      • Rebel Scum

        Kanye IS a performer.

    • CPRM

      Oh, so the dems don’t believe in Black time!? Racist!

      (Damnit, I was planning to vote for Kanye! The only vote that would let me have a clear conscience)

      • UnCivilServant

        I disagree with his platform positions.

      • CPRM

        True of them all, true of them all.

      • CPRM

        But really? 14 seconds? Are they using the Atomic Clock there? I bet bureaucratic clocks are more akin to bar clocks that run 15 minutes ahead.

    • kbolino

      This reminds me of Ohio’s myriad ways of fucking with the LP. I may dislike where the party has come today, but I will not take any pleasure in procedural hurdles being thrown up against people participating in politics.

  42. Drake

    Traveled up and down the East Coast by car this past week. Everywhere I went, it seemed that people did the mask thing when they had to, then immediately take them off when Big Brother isn’t looking. Signs everywhere demanding compliance, but most people do the absolute minimum. Went to a restaurant in NC where everyone just ignored it as soon as they walked in. Same in SC. In Harrisburg VA we had to do outdoor dining but it was obvious the college kids coming back didn’t give a crap. In WV, the hotel lobby had people all masked up – but a bunch of guests (sometimes joined by hotel staff) were out front drinking beer and playing cornhole with no masks every night.

    Most people seem to get that this is bullshit.

    • Chipwooder

      Nothing illustrates the charade of the masks better than seeing the restaurant staff loudly insist that people just walking into the restaurant have masks on…..while people at tables all around her are eating and talking without them. Wu Flu can’t leave your body when you’re eating – it’s a scientific fact.

      • AlexinCT

        Don’t blame the staff… They are enforcing a stupid and capricious law because they need to make sure they don’t provide Karens and politicians looking for vengeance with a means to shut their livelihood down, man.

        These people know that what they are being made to do is idiotic, but they also know that if they don’t do it there can and would be real ugly life destroying consequences to them. A lot of people will put up with real ugly and evil shit just to be able to keep making a living. See the way things are today in this country period. How much bullshit don’t we all put up with because fighting back can mean we are going to be jobless/homeless/imprisoned?

      • UnCivilServant

        I don’t categorically absolve the staff either. The manner in which they act and speak when enforcing a stupid and capricious law makes all the difference. You can tell when someone is revelling in petty tyranny by the way they address the issue.

      • Drake

        Those people seem to avoid jobs where their income is dependent on tips.

      • Chipwooder

        Not blaming them specifically. I know that here in VA they’re just trying to avoid Coonman’s foot soldiers from slapping them with a $10K fine, just saying that the scenario makes me laugh.

    • Rebel Scum

      I don’t mask at all, ever. Signs on restaurants about arbitrarily wearing it to the table and even the sign at the vet yesterday. I walk in maskless and no one says a damn thing.

      • Hyperion

        Around here, we always see some people not wearing mask. I have never seen anyone even pretend to care. The last time at Walmart, they actually had a person at the door who I suppose was supposed to be checking, but I watched people walk right by her without masks and she didn’t appear to even notice.

  43. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Dean Knduson sounds like the kind of shitsack that you pray never gets control of your homeowner’s association.

  44. Rebel Scum

    What?

    S. B. Anthony Museum
    @SusanBHouse

    On news of a presidential pardon for Susan B. Anthony on August 18, 2020: Objection! Mr. President, Susan B. Anthony must decline your offer of a pardon today!

    I’m glad you speak for the dead, or something. Seems rude, though.

    • Rebel Scum

      And I’m pretty sure it was not “offered”. It was granted. The end.

      • AlexinCT

        I wonder if these people would turn down a sure thing cure for a case of terminal cancer their child had just to spite Trump if it came from him. A part of me is seriously scared that they would do so and feel all warm and fuzzy about doing so cause they scored some real virtue signaling points with the idiot class that passes for their peers.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The ability of these douchebags to discredit themselves and to look petty in the process knows no bounds.

    • leon

      Speaker for the Dead was a good book though.

      • Rebel Scum

        I only read the first Ender book.

      • Rhywun

        I slogged through Speaker but gave up after that.

      • Nephilium

        I preferred the Ender’s Shadow series rather then the main sequels. The first one (Ender’s Shadow) is a retelling of Ender’s Game from Bean’s PoV, but after that it goes through what happened on Earth after the war.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Yeah, those were pretty good.

      • Cancelled

        Speaker for the dead was excellent, after that the series got very odd.

    • creech

      Trump acknowledges Susan B. did nothing wrong and this douchenozzle objects? Crosses visit to Susan B. Anthony House off list.

    • kbolino

      Just in case you might think there was some non-political reasoning behind their decision, they make sure to remove all doubt:

      If one wants to honor Susan B. Anthony today, a clear stance against any form of voter suppression would be welcome. Enforcement and expansion of the Voting Rights Act of 1965 would be celebrated.

      • kbolino

        One does wonder if a tinge of cognitive dissonance arises from defending a woman who would rather go to jail than be denied the vote while also claiming that anyone who can’t be bothered to keep their voter registration up to date or have an ID before going to vote is being “suppressed”.

  45. AlexinCT

    Am I supposed to ignore this reality in order to allow the fuckwads screaming that we should all vote through the post office? Anyone have a link to that meme that was going around where you had a bunch of asshats outside protesting the fact that they were being told they had to go outside to vote? Cause that is the level of trolling here…

    • CPRM

      Or the asshats taking kids to a large group of protesters to protest that going back to school will kill the kids.

      • AlexinCT

        Yup…

        It’s almost as if this shit is about a political agenda and virtue signaling and not really about any kind of serious problem solving….

    • creech

      Why do Dems want to have postal workers and ballot openers put their lives on the line handling filthy infected mail when voters can go to the polls in person and social distance and wear masks? How much saliva and other cooties are floating around in mail boxes? Postal worker lives matter too!

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Asses were covered

    In a follow-up statement, Goodyear CEO and President Rich Kramer announced employees are allowed to wear apparel that shows support for law enforcement while reiterating they do not endorse any political party or organization.

    “I deeply regret the impression it has created and want to clarify Goodyear’s position,” Kramer said.

    “First, to be clear, Goodyear does not endorse any political organization, party or candidate. We have a longstanding corporate policy that asks associates to refrain from workplace expressions in support of any candidate or political party.

    “Second, Goodyear strongly supports our law enforcement partners and deeply appreciates all they do to put their lives on the line each and every day for our communities. We have proudly supplied tires to police and fire personnel for more than 100 years and that relationship is foundational to our company.

    “We have clarified our policy to make it clear associates can express support for law enforcement through apparel at Goodyear facilities.”

    Guy from fleet sales: “Ummm, sir, do you have any idea how many Goodyear Police Special tires we sell in a year? Or used to, anyway.”

    *If you go here, you’ll see a grovelling apology.

    • Chipwooder

      They still encourage Black Lives Matter and forbid All Lives Matter, so fuck ’em.

      BTW, if you listen to the audio from the presentation where that slide was shown, you can hear the worker bees snickering at the speaker. Warmed my icy little heart.

      • Brochettaward

        It’s fucking Goodyear. Of course the employees were snickering. The real loopy thing is just how out of touch PR and HR departments are from the actual workers and customers of some of these companies.

      • AlexinCT

        The credentialed elite class has nothing but disdain for those people that refuse to see the world with the shit stained lenses these top men see the world with…

      • DOOMco

        They’ll find out sooner or later.

      • Rhywun

        “Black Lives Matter is not a political organization, racist.”

    • Brochettaward

      So, they are basically admitting that the training materials were legit despite their attempt at creating the impression of a denial before.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Said it last night. The call and now the CEO’s statement show this wasn’t training material. It was coverage of their dress code policy change.

      • Sensei

        I think that was an excellent observation.

        As I’ve had to read this kind of spin for a living your hypothesis neatly matches the facts.

    • AlexinCT

      I am pissed they didn’t allow comments so I could tell them to go fuck a duck with that lame ass fake apology of theirs.

  47. Brochettaward

    Trump, when asked about QAnon conspiracy theorists at his last press conference:
    “They like me very much, which I appreciate,” he said.

    Basically sums up Trump’s life philosophy.

    No link as it was from Reason and there’s some bullshit from Soave at the end calling Laura Loomer a “bigot.” I don’t know what evidence he has of Loomer’s bigotry because I haven’t seen any.

    • Chipwooder

      I don’t know why they can’t just say Loomer is crazy since, y’know, she is. These days, it seems that the only way to discredit someone is by insisting they’re secretly in the Klan.

      • Festus' Mustache

        She’s wild and woolly but to be honest, she’s a 35 year ago wood. I had no standards.

      • mrfamous

        Had?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        She does seem a bit manic but why do you say she’s crazy? Is it because she thinks everyone’s out to get her which, you know, they are?

      • Chipwooder

        Well, there was the episode where she hysterically claimed someone slashed her tires, and then posted pictures of a deflated tire that clearly was simply dry-rotted.

      • Sensei

        I remember that.

      • Viking1865

        The issue is, as with so many other things, the double standards. No one who jumped on the fever dream of RUSSIIANZZZZZ!!!!! is allowed to call anyone else a conspiracy theorist, in my book. You have forfeited that right.

        Both parties have their pet conspiracy theories. Only one party gets labeled by the media as being infested with conspiracy theorists.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opinion_polls_about_9/11_conspiracy_theories#United_States

      • Akira

        And I hate this logic that a conspiracy theory is automatically false. Tons of things have happened throughout history that sound like wackjob conspiracy theories if you describe them to someone who isn’t aware of all the evidence.

        I read an anecdote about a Hungarian Jew who managed to escape from one of the death camps, and he promptly ran back to his village and tried to tell everyone what was going on. Everyone laughed at him, insulted him, and called him a raving lunatic.

        The aversion shouldn’t be to conspiracy theories but to claims without evidence.

      • mrfamous

        The thing is about conspiracy theories is that sometimes people conspire.

      • Rhywun

        Racism is literally the worst thing ever and only white Americans are capable of it.

    • Rebel Scum

      Basically sums up Trump’s life philosophy.

      Dude wants to be liked. I doubt he even knows what Q is about. Hell, I barely do.

      • Viking1865

        It’s another fucking 4chan meme that has leaked out to the normies. QAnon is a guy posting on 4chan with all these wild conspiracy claims. No one on 4chan believes it, its all playing along. It’s a form of collaborative and performative fiction. It’s like WWE.

        4chan header

        “The stories and information found here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything found here as fact”

      • Cancelled

        The problem is the great prevalence of fools

      • Agent Cooper

        My son loves watching old Alex Jones stuff. But it’s just entertainment.

  48. Festus' Mustache

    Gah. Work is trying to make me crack its neck like Clinton on a trip to Perv Island. Might see you on the zoom.

  49. The Late P Brooks

    Would you know there was a “pandemic” happening if the media didn’t tell you?

    Absolutely not.

    • juris imprudent

      Precisely the difference between now and the 1968 flu epidemic.

  50. Rebel Scum

    Chris, you ignorant slut.

    “I understand that Republicans will say that Joe Biden wants to take away your Second Amendment rights,” Wallace added. “The only problem with that is, Biden has made it clear over and over [that] he’s not interested in taking away Second Amendment rights, he’s interested in taking away weapons of mass destruction like assault weapons.”

    Someone does not understand the point and purpose of 2A. Every militia act I have perused suggest that citizens should be at least able (required by said acts) to arm themselves like government infantry. Also, the requisite mention of artillery on private ships and all that jazz.

    • Viking1865

      But remember, everyone at FoxNews is a rightwing nutjob.

      • Rebel Scum

        “Oh, sure. You just get your lies from Faux News.” <- When I question a leftist on some CNN, MSNBC, etc. narrative.

        I don't refer to it all as corporate media for nothing.

      • kbolino

        Judging by the comments, everyone at Fox News is suffering from TDS.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      WMD is traditionally thought of as something that can kill at least thousands in one fell swoop. We let the anti gunners rewrite the definition at our peril. Also, fuck Chris Wallace.

    • Tejicano

      Yup, it seems that woven into the DNC’s hard turn and acceleration to the left definitely includes all their old gun ban hobby horses:

      https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/democrats-unprecedented-embrace-of-gun-control/ar-BB18cXfc?ocid=msedgntp

      Forced confiscation (mandatory buybacks), total registration of all firearms (under the guise of Universal Background Checks), and banning all semi-auto long arms as well as magazines with more than 10 round capacity.

      Once they get the tip in expect to see handguns added to the NFA.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      weapons of mass destruction like assault weapons

      Stupid twat

    • Rhywun

      Joe Biden does not want to take away your Second Amendment rights. His designated gun czar, “Beto” O’Rourke does want to take away your Second Amendment rights. Joe Biden is not “Beto” O’Rourke.

      Fact Check: False

      • B.P.

        The dog looks terrified, like someone had to beat it into the picture’s framing.

    • WTF

      So, Biden doesn’t say he wants to eliminate the second amendment completely (yet), he just wants to violate it with multiple infringements.
      Interesting argument there, Chris.

      • Akira

        It’s truly frightening how Leftists can, in the same breath, say that guns should be taken away and also that nobody wants to take guns away and anyone who thinks so is crazy.

        I always challenge “nobody wants to take your guns” when I hear it uttered, and this same argument always plays out:

        “Nobody wants to take your guns”
        (I give examples of numerous people who have openly stated the desire to do that)
        “Nobody of any significance has said that”
        (Give more examples of prominent members of the Democrat Party)
        “Well that stuff has no chance of passing.”
        (Give examples of other restrictive gun laws that have passed with no problem)
        “Well… They’re better on other issues like the environment and economic equality.”

    • Not Adahn

      So he’s back to saying Iraq did have weapons of mass destruction?

      • UnCivilServant

        Technically they did – it just wasn’t the spectacular apocalypse bombs we’d been promiced, nor did the chemical weapons stockpiles we gave them help the narratives being pushed.

    • Rhywun

      lol what an asshole

  51. Rebel Scum

    Hm…

    The Los Angeles Superior Court decided Thursday that John MacArthur and his Grace Community Church cannot be held in contempt of court for holding indoor church services in defiance of California state orders — a charge sought by Los Angeles County — because there is no court order barring them from holding such services.

    And if there was 1A just ceases to matter?

    • Fifth Knight of the Derp Table

      Christfaggery is hate speech, and hate speech isn’t free speech. They should all be executed for spouting bigotry, or at least imprisoned…

      Did I do that properly?

      • juris imprudent

        You forgot to add, but Islam is the religion of peace and we have no issues with it.

      • PieInTheSky

        You are an extremist. Public shaming, caning, a day in the stocks and writing 10 page self-criticism is enough

  52. Rebel Scum

    It’s good to be king.

    After the data delays, Newsom held a press conference at which he said plainly, “I’m Governor. The buck stops with me.”

    But now the Sacramento Bee reported that Newsom — who promised to cut his own pay as he ordered state workers’ checks to be cut by 10 percent — has been drawing his full monthly salary of $17,479.

    That, with Californians suffering after Newsom closed all but essential businesses in March, shuttering film and TV production in the state. Newsom’s Plumpjack winery, however, was open until early July. PlumpJack, received a loan worth between $150,000 and $350,000 from the Paycheck Protection Program, according to data released by the U.S. Treasury Department, according to CBS News affiliate in Sacramento.

    • CPRM

      “I’m Governor. The buck stops with me.”

      Well, yeah, that means all the moneys go to him, peasant.

  53. Rhywun

    Comedy gold.

    “I cannot wait to see [Harris] debate our current vice president, Mica Paentz, or is it Paints?” Louis-Dreyfus asked.

    “It’s pronounced Ponce, I believe,” Yang said.

    “Oh, some kind of weird foreign name?” she said, apparently mocking the Trump administration’s positions on immigration.

    “Yeah, not very American sounding,” Yang agreed.

    Expected idiocy from Hollywood elite-person. Yang stooping to this level… SMDH. Whatever position they’re promising him better be worth it.

    The actress did turn sincere for part of her performance, telling viewers that she first met Biden after giving an interview for the Amtrak magazine Arrive, which he presumably read while taking the train between Washington and Delaware.

    LOL OMFG.

    • PieInTheSky

      In the end it is good to be a billionaire heiress successful actor. So logic would dictate, she must know everything about politics as well.

      • Nephilium

        Dude… she played a Vice President and President in a TV show. So she’s got that deep understanding of politics that’s needed.

      • PieInTheSky

        if you had to fuck her or kamala who would you?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Young her, think Christmas Vacation her.

      • PieInTheSky

        nono now

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Still her, billionaire heiress and maybe she’d fall in love and leave me some money.

  54. The Late P Brooks

    Great googly moogly

    A little something to jaunt around town in.

    • Fifth Knight of the Derp Table

      If I were to ever spend that amount of money on a car that was designed anything like that it would be on a classic Morgan Roadster.

    • PieInTheSky

      how many airbags in that thing?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      If only it were electric.

      /nobody ever

  55. The Late P Brooks

    “I cannot wait to see [Harris] debate our current vice president, Mica Paentz, or is it Paints?” Louis-Dreyfus asked.

    “It’s pronounced Ponce, I believe,” Yang said.

    It’s pronounced “Penz”. You know. Like what they keep the little baby immigrants in.

  56. A Leap at the Wheel

    Delivery notification from UPS. My shipment from Rogue Fitness is arriving today. Unfortunately, its just the squat stand. The barbells and weights I ordered from a different vendor 4 months ago won’t ship till September 🙁 (they decided not to jack up prices and take pre-orders 24/7, but you’ll have to wait, instead of Rogue, which makes orders available on Friday for the whole weeks’ run and they sell out in ~45 seconds)

    BUT, now I can do dumbbell curls in the squat rack, like God intended.

    • PieInTheSky

      Rogue Fitness – is that not over priced?

      • mrfamous

        There’s three types of free weight equipment right now:

        1. Overpriced
        2. Junk
        3. Sold out for the next five years

        I’d like to say “I hope the people responsible for this nightmare will pay,” but I’m too old and jaded to believe that.

      • PieInTheSky

        May there spotters be inattentive

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        That’s basically correct. Titan fitness makes basically the same thing for a much lower price, but good luck getting it from them right now.

        Rogue kept their prices the same as far as I can tell, but good fucking luck getting anything. I was only able to snag this because it was an unpopular item (only 70 inch squat stand instead of the regular 90 inch, because my ceiling is like 89 inches off the ground) and I used a bot to get an alert and I got lucky. But I got it at their regular price and it’ll arrive 7 days after ordering.

      • KSuellington

        I’ve slowly been setting up a workout space to lift in my garage over the past few months, but it has been really tough. I’ve had to go to the sites five or six times a day to check availability but so far I got a high quality barbell from XMark along with a couple hundred pounds of nice bumper plates. I got a nice bench last week from Rep Fitness and in two weeks a rack should arrive from Titan. Also check out Fringe Fitness as they look to produce quality stuff as well.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        I ordered the bar and plates from a place called Frey Fitness. Not a big name, but I appreciated the “just make a purchase and we’ll manufacture everything in the order received, normal prices” they were doing.

        I did check the Powerblock website like every hour the day that the Minnesota manufacturers were allowed back to work (they are a MN company) and snagged a 2.5-50 lb set of dumbells from them right away. They came in before too long.

        I went with a shitty amazon bench because it goes into decline, and like decline situps. I’ll replace it with a more stable bench for pressing when they get down to a normal price.

        I already had a bunch of kettlebells and assorted shit like that.

        But nothing beats heavy barbell exercises for me. I really like fucking myself up, and there’s nothing I can do with 50 lb dumbells that replicates heavy squats or deadlifts.

      • PieInTheSky

        On fitness youtube Titan fitness is not well reviewed

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        On /r/homegym they are. I’ve seen exactly 1 squat rack they made, and it looked ok to me. They make a cambered bar that I’ll probably get at some point, and if I remember I’ll let you know what I think.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        My power rack is Titan Fitness and it is great. I don’t squat 1,000 pounds though, if that matters.

      • KSuellington

        I very much wanted the rack from Rep which looks really high quality as well as being 80 inches high (I have 81.5 inch garage ceilings) but had to settle for Titan as they happened to have one available when I went on one day. The bench I got from Rep is absolutely rock solid.

    • leon

      BUT, now I can do dumbbell curls in the squat rack, like God intended.

      And to think i thought highly of you.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Don’t yuck my yum. What I do in the privacy of my torture basement stays behind closed doors. Today I only did squats and good mornings in the squat rack, like what the bible says, and there weren’t any children present.

      • leon

        I guess we are all allowed one deviation.

      • Sensei

        Well at least for 68% or so.

    • KSuellington

      “BUT, now I can do dumbbell curls in the squat rack, like God intended”

      During this shitshow is when I first started really lifting weights in my life (I’m halfway through my 40’s) and it has been really beneficial. I always avoided it because I thought it would mess up my back worse (ripped my sacaria off my pelvis ligaments many years back) but my back has been feeling better than ever. Since I don’t have a rack I’ve had to take the barbell off the floor and get it behind my head and then back again after the sets. So I have maxed at 110 as I don’t want to do that movement with any really heavy weight. Looking forward to getting the rack so I can increase that by a lot. Also have only been doing seated presses and no bench presses as need the spot.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Rogue appears to have some racks still in stock, if you have the $$$.

        I started lifting for the first time at like 38, just a couple of years ago. Changed my life.

        I never was into athletics (tried it / forced into it a bunch as a kid and hated it). And “exercise” was always an experiment in dull pain and boredom. AKA treadmills and indoor bikes. So I never did anything fitness-related for most of my life.

        Then I discovered that, like, being stronk is good for pain, including pain from old injuries. Plus it has like spreadsheets and process optimization and shit that is like catnip for me. And cardio doesn’t even need to be slow and boring if you don’t want it to be.

  57. KSuellington

    Man, is this state determined to make living here suck as much as possible while costing as much as possible. AB5 is an absolute fucking abomination. One of the best improvements to life over the past decade has been Lyft and Uber. I don’t even go out like I did in the before kids days, but it still is a service I used once or twice a month (at least in the pre shutdown days) that ensures that I can go out with my wife or friends and have a few drinks at dinner or a bar or house and not have to think about driving. You push a button on your phone at any hour here and within a couple minutes there is a car out front waiting to take you wherever for a reasonable price. The contrast with what existed previously with cabs couldn’t be greater. There is a reason most of my friends got DUIs in their twenties. I almost always have a conversation with the drivers and they inevitably hate the idea of being employees rather than contractors where they get to set their own hours.

    • PieInTheSky

      I suggest moving to Alaska. It seem to be all the rage.

      • KSuellington

        If I could take the 23 hour darkness of winter that might be an option. Now if I could figure a way to spend four months a year in Baja and the other eight in Alaska, that would be nice.

      • PieInTheSky

        Have you considered winning your American powerball?

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      I remember waiting for hours for a taxi in SF. Uber is a godsend.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Yep. And not surprisingly, regular taxi service has also improved since Uber came on the scene.

  58. Tundra

    Orwell, anyone?

    Last line.

    Motherfuckers. Now I gotta find a new coffee shop.

    • PieInTheSky

      That is not in the right direction.

    • UnCivilServant

      “Ivana Fuckoff? Interesting name.”

    • Rufus the Monocled

      This has gotten WAAAAAYYYYYYY out of line.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      Where you somehow operating under the assumption that that place wasn’t already making their name off of virtue signaling to the right thinking mpr listeners that they, too, are right thinking mpr listeners?

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        Also, leave the name Robert’); DROP TABLE contacts;–

      • UnCivilServant

        TRUNC table contacts; commit;-

      • leon

        Just Evil

    • Agent Cooper

      “Nice to meet you, Ben Dover.”

  59. The Late P Brooks

    Motherfuckers. Now I gotta find a new coffee shop.

    All good little boys and girls devote themselves to pleasing Big Nanny.

  60. leon

    So maybe the worst take i’ve seen on the Bannon Arrest is that it shows how bad the impulse for grifting is in the GOP. As if grifting isn’t just something that politicians do and 1) at least Bannon got peoples donations voluntarily rather than forcibly extracting it to then graft into their own pockets. I know Krystal Ball would be appalled at that happening, but everything she suggests would lead to more of it.

    • kbolino

      Now do all the BLM and “anti-racist” organizations and consulting firms that have popped out of the woodwork.

  61. The Late P Brooks

    how many airbags in that thing?

    No air bags, but there’s about 70 feet of crumple zone.

  62. CPRM

    As extra incentive for any on the fence about coming to Honey Harvest, I’m going to be bringing some Hat and Hair merch to giveaway. Not sure how, maybe we’ll do a Most Dangerous Game competition to see who gets it…

    • But Enough About My Weird Culinary Fantasies

      “I get the gun, you get to run…”

      Seems fair.

    • KibbledKristen

      maybe we’ll do a Most Dangerous Game competition to see who gets it

      Honestly, this would be fun to do with laser tag or paintballs

      • KSuellington

        Maybe pellet guns to make it more interesting.

    • Fourscore

      Most Dangerous Game would be to try to leave without trying some of each food creation as the ladies are watching.

      “Oh, Mr CPRM, you didn’t get any of my Granny’s Special Whipped Cream pie and cake combo, with the chocolate sauce. Now I’ll get you another plate and bring it to you”

      They’re watching, like reverse vultures

  63. KibbledKristen

    That American Airlines story made me nervous. Thankfully Rapid City is not on the list.

  64. Timeloose

    I’m on vacation today!! I’ve been spending way too much time this week dealing with mask compliance at my work place. The state and thus the company requires masks be worn at all times. The problem is that I don’t believe it does any good, but I manage people and have to enforce the company line to stay employed.

    My employees are very independent and lean Lib or Conservative, except for one. Guess who is causing problems.

    I’ll be making Lobster sandwiches for lunch. This work week is over.

    • UnCivilServant

      I have four and a half more business days until my vacation.

      • Fourscore

        …and what business is that? The one you you give to the tax payer?

    • CPRM

      Ultimately it is my job to enforce all the rules at work. I don’t want to bust customers for smoking pot or anyone for not wearing a mask, but if you get too brazen about it I have to, or I risk losing my job. Keep it on the DL yo.

  65. PieInTheSky

    Sierra Nevada pale ale 12,3 lei in the local supermarket. Not bad but could have been more bitter.

    The label says handcrafted ale… what does that even mean? I doubt it is to hand crafted if it made its way in Romanian supermarkets.

    Also why the fuck is it 355 ml? Beer is usually 330 ml.

    I remember some french beer I found in a local shop that was 250. Lots of trips to the fridge.

    Anyhoo point is you Americans need more hops in your beer

    • UnCivilServant

      There are too many hops in beer as is, there needs to be less.

      • PieInTheSky

        heather ale man?

    • UnCivilServant

      355 is 12 fluid ounces – normal size for a beer.

      • PieInTheSky

        countries who like the finer things in life use ml

      • UnCivilServant

        That is factually untrue. You won’t even come and try the finer foods in life.

    • Viking1865

      “Also why the fuck is it 355 ml? Beer is usually 330 ml.”

      Ron: “All my life I’ve avoided Europe, and it’s multitudes of terribleness, but it turns out, much to my surprise, there is actually one place in Europe that is worth seeing. These tiny islands off the coast of Scotland, where God’s chosen elixirs are distilled, barrelled, and prepared for consumption. This is worth the trip.”

    • PieInTheSky

      imported in the UK by SNBC rest of Europe Grand Cru Beers Dublinv

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      *More* hops? I used to like you Pie.

    • Homple

      Real beer comes in 500 ml lots, and its basic ingredient is barley malt, not hops.

    • robc

      SNPA is a pale ale, not an IPA. Less hops, less alcohol, more balanced, in general. Plus SNPA uses Cascade hops, not my favorites.

    • Nephilium

      SNPA was also one of the first independent brewery started up here in the US. I think they are the oldest independent post-prohibition brewery still in operation.

    • Fifth Knight of the Derp Table

      ‘Americans need more hops in your beer’

      You obviously haven’t been exposed to the influx of overly hoppy hipster brews that have dominated the shelves of American liquor stores over the last few years around here. Give it time. If the market here seeps into Dacia you’ll reflexively gag at the mear thought of that bitter, overly acid additive meant for long overseas voyages known as anything that remotely resembles an IPA.

      IMHO, hops and malts should balance each other out in most occasions. I don’t want to drink a Brussel Sprout or Molasses.

    • Chipwooder

      Peaceful protesting at its finest.

  66. pan fried wylie

    So, I took the plunge and cancelled my cable tv. … Any opinions on boxes for the dumb one in case I want to Netflix/Hulu/whatever?

    Seeing how I’m late as shit to the party here, I should probably write an article if I want my thoughts on the matter read by anyone, but here goes.

    After my my mom asked me to setup her firestick back in 2014, I immediately ordered my own fireTV, as I was sick of playing content off the computer out to the TV. Things had only slightly improved moving from the CRT/RCA era into the LCD/HDMI era. Certain combinations of games and media formats/players did not play nice and full screen gaming on the primary display resulted in a media window unable to draw the picture correctly if at all. Fiddling with the overlay settings might be able to get a working combo, or maybe you just waste 20mins of tabbing in and out. Web players were the only exception, but no help there if you were trying to watch a DVD (I used the PC for that) or your old Dr. Who collection while gaming.

    Thoughts of eschewing physical media flooding my brain, the fireTV seemed ideal at the time, and I embarked on filling my digital library over the years with the essential classic, as well as picking up new releases I knew I’d watch more than a handful of times and renting anything I couldn’t wait to see on Netflix or Prime next year etc.

    6 years later and on my 2nd fireTV. I fucking hate the thing. Can’t prevent it going to sleep; can’t extend the interval. Same with screensaver. Then they introduced adds to the default pictures saver, so I finally had to upload my desktop pics to a library yada yada. Still can’t sort or organize your library in anyway. With over 200 titles now, voice search is the only viable option and I fucking hate talking to machines. Can’t create playlists, and yet they added a Next Up feature in the last couple years, which just picks semi-related random shit. Be nice if it could point to stuff I’d actually WANT to be next, huh?

    Few years ago they switched from portrait thumbnails to landscape. You do most of your scrolling across a horizontal set, not up and down through the sets. The switch fucked everything up. So, ok, now it can fit one more set on the screen, but not really because they just used the freed vertical space for additional banner you have to navigate over to get to the actual categories, but there’s like 4 fewer titles across the screen now, so you have to scroll right, scan, scroll right, scan, scroll right, scan, scroll right, scan WAY FUCKING MORE. I think it kills the remote batteries faster too, I swear I’m replacing them twice yearly lately (two AAs). No text representation of the titles, and then they keep changing the fucking thumbnails every 6months. So you add something to your watchlist, then don’t recognize what it is later.

    My plan now is to put together some sort of micropower PC with a generic Bluetooth remote and just use the web-based viewers for Prime/Netflix/Hulu to run the TV.

    That’s my $0.72

  67. leon

    I just saw Part of Bidens acceptance speech. In it he promises to govern with the “Best of us, not the Worst” and to be an “Ally of Light not darkness”. You know, i know that the elections have always been contentious, but now it seems that labeling the half the country that voted against you as the darkness and evil that pervade society… I don’t see how a free society could possible survive in such a hostile environment. Each side is bound to keep escalating until they attempt destroy the other to assure their dominance.

    • leon

      ^^ Also the thing that gets me about that is that the title of the clip was “Biden promises to bring unity”. How the fuck is declaring that the other side is “The worst of us” bringing unity. Go fuck yourself.

    • A Leap at the Wheel

      This is nothing new. Remember when Reagan said he wanted America to be a “Shining city on the hill, and none of you libtards can be in it!!”

      • Fatty Bolger

        Not sure if you’re being sarcastic or not, but “city upon a hill” wasn’t invented by Reagan, was also used by Obama, and is inclusive and entirely different from what Leon is describing.

      • A Leap at the Wheel

        I was being sarcastic. While I was a kid when it all happened, I remember Uncle Ronny being pretty good at the warm-and-fuzzies-we-are-all-in-this-together. So was Clinton, in a more awe-shuck-I’m-just-one-of-the-guys way.

        Then Gingrich happened, and the Parable of the Hanging Chad happened, etc etc etc. I don’t blame any of them for it in particular. I think they are the result of, not the cause of, underlying structural changes that produce more divisive politics.

      • leon

        Well… I was born after Regan was president, so no. But yeah, i know the divisiveness isn’t new, but i generally saw it around party leadership (Nancy Pelosi is the devil! Joe Biden is the most evil person in the world). I could be wrong, but it seems that the urge to utterly dominate one side or the other is becoming naked. This isn’t just limited to the Dems, I’m just using Biden as an example. You see the same thing in a sense with the “Own the Libs” stuff. Anything to show your dominance over the enemy.

  68. pan fried wylie

    We put out a sink outside. By doing that, the kids come in clean as opposed in the past they had to walk through the daycare dirty.

    You weren’t hosing the kids off as a matter of procedure, like, always?

    Fucking amateur.

    • pan fried wylie

      A good businessman is always worried.

      That’s what kills them.