GlibFit 4.0 – Coronavirus Edition XX: Making It Harder

by | Aug 2, 2020 | Fitness, GlibFit | 210 comments

I’m just going to assume SP will pick something fitness related for the Glibs’ homepage photo for this article.  If Q does it then I’m in real trouble.

This exchange with mrfamous last week got me thinking:

If you can’t get into your gym because your governor shut it down, how you make your workout more challenging other than increasing your reps?  One method is to alter the exercises you are already doing to make them emphasize a different muscle group.  Another is to deliberately involve a second major muscle group.

Here are two examples.  The first is diamond cutter pushups.  In the traditional pushup, your hands should be roughly shoulder width apart, when you descend your shoulders should line up with your hands, elbows are at a 45-degree angle, your ascent should be felt primarily in your chest.

Per AthleanX, here are the instructions for a diamond cutter pushup:

Get into a pushup position but instead of having your arms out under your shoulders, bring them in so they are directly under your chest. Your pointer finger and thumb should be touching your opposite hands pointer finger and thumb creating a diamond shape. Slowly lower your chest to a few inches above your hands and forcefully push up by contracting your chest and your triceps.

Your triceps are much more involved in the movement.  It’s your triceps, rather than your chest, that will likely be the constraint on total reps.

The second variation is the Cross Knee Plank Pushup.  Your starting form is the same as a traditional pushup.  During descent, bring one knee up and across your body.  Think of it as trying to touch your knee to your opposite elbow.  That knee must stay off the floor.  You have three points of contact during the movement.  When you ascend, the leg straightens out to give you four points of contact at the end of the movement.  You just worked your chest and abs in one movement.

 

******************************************************************************

 

In coronavirus news, I continue to hate everyone. That’s not really news anymore.  Daughter 1 got screwed out of returning to campus this fall.  Her frustration is palpable.

My 83 year old father has become my barometer for what more or less normal people think is going on.  Dad has always been politically middle of the road.  He gets his news from the MSM and is unlikely to get it from an alternate source unless something in his social media feed flags it.  Every time we talk, I mention something he hasn’t heard before that’s germane to the Covid-19 public policy discussion.  Every week he asks why he hasn’t heard about that.  Indeed, Dad.  Indeed.

I have followed Sweden with great interest since they announced they would not shut down and would follow the path to herd immunity.  Here is a chart of their daily Covid-19 deaths:

 

Why on earth didn’t we follow their example? We would be done with this shit show by now.

 

This week’s music is for every Glib who has the balls to be “that guy” when discussing the ridiculousness of the shutdowns.

One for Mojeaux because she’s been keeping at it.

About The Author

Chafed

Chafed

I'm looking California but feeling Minnesota

210 Comments

  1. Grosspatzer

    I’m just going to assume SP will pick something fitness related for the Glibs’ homepage photo for this article. If Q does it then I’m in real trouble.

    Not with me.

  2. Rhywun

    We would be done with this shit show by now.

    Ha, no.

    NYC has almost as many people as Sweden and we are down to single-digit daily deaths. Deblasio and Cuomo are no closer to letting us be done with this shit show than they were in April.

    • Grosspatzer

      Nothing a few billion (or trillion) bailout dollars won’t fix.

    • Chafed

      That’s sort of my point. Sweden’s politicians made a deliberate choice to stay open. Cuomo and DeBlasio have made a deliberate choice to shutdown and stay that way.

      • Rhywun

        Oh I get it. It is a nice fantasy 🙂

  3. JD is in the United Karendom

    Any mention of Sweden here has been DOOOOOOOM!!! to paint a picture of them having completely fucked up, so outright lies. Also until more recently, in keeping with CCP directives, there was hardly any (if any at all) mention of Taiwan.

    • Don did not Escape Spring Training

      I have followed Sweden with great interest since they announced they would not shut down and would follow the path to herd immunity. . . Why on earth didn’t we follow their example? We would be done with this shit show by now.

      This is probably not quite right in two ways. Look at total deaths, and the first thing you’ll see is the US is where Sweden is ~500/M; all versions of the US/Sweden death curves have been flying in formation the entire time. If anything, what we should take from Sweden is: nothing matters.

      I’ve been saying this for weeks, but I’ll type it out again: pretty much everyone is converging on the same total impact sooner or later; there’s no shame or virtue in whether you’re front- or back-loaded; all that matters is whether you ruined your economy over something that you really can’t control in the meanwhile.

      The second thing is the first thing: there’s every reason to think we’re all headed to 1,000/M deaths sooner or later. That’s a huge total, but it’s a small fraction, the sort of number any reasonable person would have gladly accepted in March as a no-better/no-worse scenario. Every US state is headed to 1,000/M. Four states seem to be headed to 2,000; as I like to say, like warranty narratives, this is a picture but not really data. The four (seemingly) special states are NY, NJ, CT, and MA: they are high-maintenance, high-bureaucracy, big fat liar states; they are NOT the fattest and most diabetic and oldest states full of not-remotely-normal Americans, so they’re fliers, flinch shots.

      Once the data are sorted away, the absolute values will change, the numbers will be more global than not. All the screaming about India? Big place that’s just not got it yet: not interesting, just big. Either we’re all headed to 2k/M or the lying liars will be rated down to 1k/M; I don’t care: it’s the same reality. That same reality: one million (maybe less: keep reading) will die in India; sucks for them (invest in shovels), but it’s just a big place, nothing more.

      Maybe two types emerge: developed and third world. Maybe. Much more likely: old people who die because they couldn’t outrun a virus are a global event; my guess is all the variability will be described by the age profiles and general health of countries . . . so, India being younger than the US, maybe not the full million.

      The Platte, Elk, Tennessee, and Wabash have better and worse days, some more turbid than others. In New Orleans (and Belem and Cairo), the color of the river never changes. It all washes out.

  4. Grosspatzer

    My “workouts” are mostly 2-mile walks, about 3 per day. Except when, like now, it is 90+ with dew point of 75. Expecting to gain a few pounds.

  5. Gustave Lytton

    Regular, diamonds, and wide arm (What I think you’re describing with the the 45 degree out in the clipped discussion) were standard variations in PT. During a test, if you were fatiguing, switching to wide arms can give a little bit of rest while still incrementing your count rather than wasting time and energy in the front leaning rest.

    During exercise, don’t be afraid to drop to your knees to continue. Nothing wrong with essentially decreasing the weight being pushed to increase reps or work to maximum muscle fatigue depending on what your goal is. Or if you’re starting out/getting back into it.

    Dip bars, either fixed or on a machine, are excellent for strengthening push-up muscles.

    • Chafed

      That’s a really good point about doing the exercise from your knees.

  6. DEG

    This week’s music is for every Glib who has the balls to be “that guy” when discussing the ridiculousness of the shutdowns.

    I’m getting tired of discussing this insanity with certain relatives.

    I see the appeal of an echo chamber. I’m just fucking tired of people wanting to live in fear.

    That is a good song.

    Last night I stopped in at a brewpub for their live music. They’re starting live music on their patio. I chatted with the manager. Business for them is good, but once the Fall comes around, they’re fucked. No one will want to eat outdoors. They can’t survive on indoor only at 50% capacity.

    Today I had brunch at the local Irish pub. Well, the older of the two local Irish pubs. A new one opened around the corner. The staff want a return to normal. “You can’t keep living in fear”.

    GlibFit stuff: Weight went from 276.4 to 276. Last week I was able to do box squats with almost full range of motion (bottom of hamstrings were parallel) with a nine pound kettlebell held goblet squat style. RDLs are bad. I can’t get much of a range of motion and they started triggering pain. The trainer I’m working with at the gym wants to rearrange a program to have a little less lower body work because of the work I do at physical therapy. My physical therapist tried an evaluation of my hamstrings. A hamstring stretch where she raises my leg while I’m lying on my back. Right leg goes up about 20 degrees, which is down from about three weeks ago (40 degrees). Left leg goes up about 40 degrees (down from 50 degrees about three weeks ago). She thinks the herniation is still pushing up against the nerve. Well, I’ll keep working at it.

    • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

      yup, I’m done talking about it. I’ll spew a few platitudes and change the topic. The alternative is raging at people who have the audacity to be uninformed/misinformed about something, and that’s just letting my frustration out on the wrong people.

  7. Derpetologist

    I ran 9 miles last week and walked 12 miles last night. Was booze free for 4 out of the last 7 days. It’s always the 3rd day in a row that’s the hardest.

    I put about 100 pounds of stuff in a dufflebag and carried it up and down a few flights of stairs. I did because I needed to share some of my gear with my pt group, but I may start doing that kind of stair climbing exercise with weight for its own sake.

    Had a bottle of Leffe brown earlier and am now enjoying a Hoegaarden.

    Random fun facts: punch comes from the Farsi (Persian) word for 5, panj. Traditionally, punch had 5 ingredients: water, sugar, lemon, booze, and tea. Punjab means 5 waters in Farsi because 5 rivers flow through the place. Julep is a garbling of gulab, which means rose water in Farsi.

    • robc

      2 cups sweet red wine
      2 cups strong tea
      2/3 cup rum

      1/2 cup packed brown sugar
      1/2 cup rye whiskey
      1/2 cup orange juice

      1/3 cup gin
      1/3 cup brandy
      1/3 cup lemon juice
      1 bottle dry champagne
      Mix all ingredients except champagne. Cover and refrigerate for several days. Stir in champagne just before serving.

      Mostly fits that rule. Chatham Artillery Punch, I think I have posted the recipe before. Revolutionary War era punch. The FFs were some drinky dudes.

  8. Derpetologist

    Since pull-ups got their own article and push-ups are this week’s theme, may I suggest the dip? It’s a body weight exercise where you use your arms and chest instead of your back to propel yourself upwards. Two parallel bars are best, but any sturdy, stationary hip height objects will do.

    chair exercises with fitness legend Jack Lalane
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlgdFHvDVjY

    old timey tv has a kind of polite quaintness about it

    Other bits of somewhat relevance – it takes me about 10 miles of walking to lose a pound. My weight still more than 20 pounds over my max. Frowny face.

    Wasn’t there some song about walking 500 miles?

      • Derpetologist

        ***
        I don’t eat much.
        ***

        I’m pretty sure this will prove to be the key to my long term weight loss success. Exercising like crazy works too, but it’s hard to keep up long term.

      • Grosspatzer

        Played soccer in HS, could not gain an ounce no matter how much I ate. Combination of age and less activity means I need to mind my diet.

        Much better song (only 25 miles, though):

        https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=hFredbE3goM

      • Derpetologist

        My weight stayed under 160 until I started drinking beer often. That started about 10 years ago.

        Whenever I’m in a grocery or convenience store, I always end up in front of the beer even if it’s not why I’m there. I home in on it like a salmon migrating up stream.

      • Grosspatzer

        Driving was my kryptonite. Got my license and first car at age 38, stopped walking everywhere, and it was all downhill from there. Eventually ballooned to 270 (I’m 5’8″) and had gastric surgery at age 62. Lost 100 lbs and am managing so far to keep the weight at about 170.

      • Derpetologist

        I’m 5’4 and was 207 shortly before turning 30. I got down to 158 over the following year and joined the Army.

        I was 150 in college (walked about 6 miles a day then), 130 when I got back from 2 years in Africa, and 172 when I left Chicago in 2013.

        I was 161 in October last year. Stupid holiday feasts.

      • The Hyperbole

        Damnit Hype, refresh before linking.

      • Grosspatzer

        Bingo! Remember that well.

      • Grosspatzer

        That’s a good one!

      • Gdragon

        And another version
        that takes me back to high school

    • Surly Knott

      Or this far.

      • Grosspatzer

        I wondered who was going to step up with this. Thanks!

  9. Gustave Lytton

    they announced they would not shut down

    This is a little misleading. There were/are restrictions enacted by the government and there were suggested restrictions that were largely followed because Euros are sheep/high trust societies.

  10. Drake

    diamond cutter pushups – in Boot Camp we did similar push-up with hands together. We stuck our butts in the air and brought our faces down to our hands. This was known as “pussy-eater” push-ups.

  11. Tundra

    Hiya Chafed!

    I’ve been back at the gym for awhile and, while wearing a mask is retarded, I was so over fucking bodyweight exercises.

    Should they shut us down again, I will use your advice. Reps are sucky and boring.

    I finished my 75Hard last Saturday. Ended up losing about 42 lbs and almost 7 inches off my waist. I haven’t been this thin since high school.

    My last week on the program was spent hiking in Maine, so it was a nice way to finish. Not carrying that extra weight was fucking awesome.

    I took this week off and enjoyed myself way too much (4 grad parties and a couple dinners out), but I’m ready to move on to the next challenge. I still have plenty of old man adipose that I can burn off. My numbers at the gym are starting to climb, so I’m gonna ratchet that up. I’ll add one hiit session a week and keep hiking many miles a week. I’m curious about how strong I can get at a much lower body weight/fat level.

    I made a mistake, though, in not doing any blood work before I started, so I am gonna start tracking some of that, too.

    This week’s music is for every Glib who has the balls to be “that guy” when discussing the ridiculousness of the shutdowns.

    A good chunk of my family won’t talk to me anymore 🙂

    Good luck this week, peeps!

    • egould310

      “ Ended up losing about 42 lbs and almost 7 inches off my waist.”

      Damn, bro. That’s impressive. Keep it up. And thanks for the reminder last week that salads exist. When I was on the road this week, I literally thought, “Remember what Tundra said about meat and salads…”

      • Tundra

        Thanks, man. That’s the challenge. Pretty easy to slide back into bad habits!

        Travel is a bitch. I’m gonna get back on the road shortly, so my discipline will be put to the test!

    • SP

      Wow! That’s amazing. Go you!

      • Tundra

        Thank you. It was actually pretty fun. And people not recognizing me never gets old!

    • DEG

      Ended up losing about 42 lbs and almost 7 inches off my waist.

      Good.

      • Tundra

        Not as good as buying a Triumph.

        Just sayin’ 😉

      • DEG

        Heh.

        I just checked Bring a Trailer. The one I was watching just went outside my budget.

    • IRBE

      Hey Tundra, I would have thought you would have lost more…Anyway, now what are you going to do with all that excess skin; your clothes don’t fit; you look weird wearing your son’s clothing, you pop easily into and out of the Triumph. Great troubles to have I say..great troubles indeed. Now keep it off!

      • Tundra

        ..what are you going to do with all that excess skin…

        Lamp shades.

    • Chafed

      That’s incredible Tundra. Congratulations!

      • Tundra

        Thanks, Chafed.

        It was you shaming me.

        Every.

        Single.

        Week.

        So, I owe you.

      • Chafed

        You’re welcome. (I had no idea I was shaming you.)

    • Tejicano

      Wow! Impressive progress. Inspirational even.

    • Grosspatzer

      That guy has a future in marketing. We’re hiring, but I don’t think he’d be a good fit for our woke corporate culture.

    • Derpetologist

      I would love to see a kind of game show where a bunch of Antifa get put on an island and a bunch of College Republicans get put an an island and then we watch how their develop themselves.

      I suspect it would be a kind of North Korea-South Korea dynamic in miniature.

      • Hyperion

        It will go like this. On the 3rd night, the antifas will surround their camp. To beg for food and iPhones.

    • kinnath

      Shit like this is why I contemplate spending 600 for 1000 9 mm luger. Cause, I don’t really have enough for this shit.

  12. TARDIS

    With regards to getting fit, I decided I don’t give a damn about being fit right now. I know I’m being horribly pessimistic, but I have a bad feeling about the election. Either way it goes, I’m expecting a shit show. I don’t want to waste time on fitness when I am expecting the corpse of the Republic to start stinking up the joint. I am probably wrong as usual, but whatever.

    Daughter 1 got screwed out of returning to campus this fall.

    As did my son. He was supposed to have dual mode classes, but they just changed it to all online. He already got screwed out of high school graduation. Of course being on the spectrum, he does not give a damn. He is getting more and more isolated by the day. He does not see the damage it’s doing to him.

    • Derpetologist

      Fat people are more likely to survive famines, so there’s that. Polynesians are among the fattest people in the world today, but that was not always so.

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obesity_in_the_Pacific

      however: Obesity genes probably didn’t evolve to help us survive famine

      https://phys.org/news/2016-10-obesity-genes-didnt-evolve-survive.html

      ***
      The thrifty gene hypothesis, originally proposed by James Neel in 1962, suggests that the effective elimination of famine in developed countries means that gene variants that were once favorable for storing fat instead could cause widespread obesity. The question arises, however, as to why everyone didn’t inherit these favorable traits if selection has been acting for millions of years on our ancestors.

      Addendums to the hypothesis have tried to remedy this problem, stating that famines are relatively new (since the dawn of agriculture), so human populations haven’t had a chance to catch on, or that obesity is a secondary trait of another that would have encouraged survival, such as an ability to stay warm.
      ***

      You see? I’m not fat – I’m adapted to retain heat! Yeah, that’s the ticket.

      • TARDIS

        You see? I’m not fat – I’m adapted to retain heat! Yeah, that’s the ticket.

        Heh. So when I don’t drink, I start releasing my heat. Well, I can’t have that. Just say no to night sweats.

    • Grosspatzer

      That sucks. My older boy is on the spectrum, scheduled to graduate from college in December (Inshallah) and has spent most of the summer isolating upstairs. I’m worried about him, he won’t even watch a ballgame with me for more than 10 minutes.

      • IRBE

        I am worried for my college sons as well. I think they handled it pretty well for the short term but as this drags out I am seeing/sensing they are regressing into some anti-social tendencies. I can see where some of social media/rioting behavior is coming from…this is not good for them at this time.

      • Drake

        My son visits and / or works out with friends pretty much every day.

    • Hyperion

      Don’t worry too much, unless you’re worried about bad orange man being bad orange man for 4 more years.

      If you’re worried about Biden winning, I don’t think it’s going to happen, after some serious contemplation on this, I think the dems are going to lose badly.

      For starts, there’s this:

      Don’t debate Trump!

      No one saw that coming.

      Also, recent polls are showing that a large majority of people are starting to be very concerned about all these riots and their own safety, while the democrats either play it down or openly support the rioters. I have no fucking idea how they think catering to BLM and antifa is going to win over people in the burbs. It’s having just the opposite effect.

      Yes, the dems are going to try to cheat with mail in only voting, but I don’t think they’ll be able to cheat their way to victory. No matter how much Karen in the burbs signals about how woke the is, in the end, she’s more concerned about her family’s safety than anything else. Democrats are going to blow this thing big time. Biden’s 20 point lead in the polls is already rapidly evaporating, it’s now around 7% and it’s barely August. And the polls are badly skewed to favor democrat voters. It’s margin of error now, in the over sampling of democrats polls. Just wait for a couple more months of these ‘peaceful protests’. Maybe the dems want to lose so they can keep up these riots for another 4 years. People are going to get sick of this shit and it’s not going to go well for antifa or the dems.

      • Q Continuum

        If they think refusing to debate will help them I want some of what they’re smoking. People don’t appreciate a coward, especially one that is ostensibly supposed to be leading a nation.

      • Hyperion

        Yeah, no shit, I have a bridge over a swamp to sell them. They made this bed, now they’re going to lie in it.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        If they think refusing to debate will help them I want some of what they’re smoking. People don’t appreciate a coward, especially one that is ostensibly supposed to be leading a nation.

        Well yeah, that’s why they’re trying to make ridiculous demands that they know Trump won’t agree to, so they can spin it as “Trump refuses to debate Biden.”

      • TARDIS

        unless you’re worried about bad orange man being bad orange man for 4 more years

        I’m less worried about OMB than the commies, but still. I have to drive through Atlanta to get to work. I worry about getting stuck in an I-75 insurrection.

      • Hyperion

        Pull over, pull out your AR and mow them all down. The ones that are left, run over them.

        Sometimes when you stand, you have to stand alone. Thank you for your service.

        I can tell you this much, if I have that happen to me in Baltimore, I’ll run over them. I worry about the legal issues later, but I have a 2 ton vehicle that says you’re not getting me out of my car, and if you try, you’re going to die or at least probably be seriously injured.

      • TARDIS

        I told my wife I’ll be driving the Explorer for just that reason. My employer has an explicit policy about guns in the parking lot though. I know many people ignore it, but with all that is going on I can see a shakedown as a possibility. They need to get rid of people, and a “safety” violation is a good excuse.

      • Hyperion

        You don’t need a gun, although would not advise against having one in your car, that vehicle is one hell of a weapon. And if any smartass, like antifa girl from that video thinks hey are dragging me out of my car, they’re going to get a lifetime scar on their face from getting hit with the business end of my flashlight, right before getting ran over.

        Fuck that shit, I’ll fucking run over you and I’m not bluffing, antifa wussies.

      • Don did not Escape Spring Training

        GA’s parking lot laws are so stupid it’s hard to believe they weren’t written in Austin.

      • Don did not Escape Spring Training

        PS: I had an office in Norcross last year; I could legally store in the car there, but I couldn’t care less, of course.

      • Threedoor

        Yep

      • Plinker762

        I look down at your 2 ton vehicle from my 3 ton vehicle with the extra 6″ of antifa clearance.

    • Chafed

      TARDIS unless you believe the end times are nigh, get off your ass and do something. I get the pessimism. I have been down myself. But this is about you and living with yourself. Do something to make yourself feel good.

      • The Hyperbole

        Hmmm…sitting on my fat ass and drinking Strohs makes me feel good. I’m on it! Thanks Chafed!

      • TARDIS

        *chuckles*

        Thanks for the encouragement, Chafed!

        I was walking 3 miles a day, mostly to relieve boredom. I just gave up when I got the blood clot. I’m just having visions of the commies coming for the guns. Does it it matter if I’m fit when SWAT riddles me with bullets? I would rather drink and be calm.

        My weight is actually an improvement from two years ago. I was 225, but I’ve been a steady 215 since I spent some time in the hospital. My proper weight should be less than 185. I’ve just gotten squishy and weak. Muscle mass is disappearing rapidly.

  13. egould310

    Ran a bunch this week. Ran 8 miles this morning. Ascended the gnarly stairway up the east side of Queen Anne; 38 floors according to my health app. Feeling good, looking good.

    Was on the road overnight in Vancouver and managed to eat reasonably well.

    Got some yoga mats arriving tomorrow, so will try to get a quick living room yoga session after work/before dinner. At least, that’s the plan.

    Now it’s Smirnoff/oh/Perrier and Netflix. And looking at guitars on Reverb. Happy Sunday y’all!

  14. IRBE

    Hi Chafed, Thanks for the new edition. Everyone loves a good push-up. Please take care with the fires and such in the area.

    Workout wise it was a typical week but I managed a bit more discipline at the table and avoided the bar.. and lost a pound, which was important since I was gaining the previous week. The stretching seems to be really helping with the back and I am tempted to swing a club at the driving range this week.

    Hike today was 7 miles with some elevation. Trails were crowded and masks are more prevalent. In the spirit of defeating this insidious virus, we are taking masks with us on the trail. I will don my mask, if you do it first. It is an alpha flex and leads to awkward interactions. I tried to make the interaction less weird by holding my mask in-place by pinching it to my nose when greeting or talking. Sometimes I also try not to breath…cause I care.

    • Chafed

      Good work on the weight loss. I’m glad to hear the stretching is bringing you some pain relief.

  15. egould310

    Oh, and I gave myself a nice pedicure this morning, too. My toesies look and feel fantastic. Better job than the Vietnamese ladies do.

    • Hyperion

      “Better job than the Vietnamese ladies do.”

      And no tippy tipply, where my tippy!?

      I just hope you did a good paint job.

      • egould310

        I don’t paint them. I finish by slathering them in Neosporin, and putting on some light cotton footies. Maybe I’ll paint them this evening.

    • DEG

      Good collection.

    • Chafed

      2 and done.

      35 has a lot to be proud of.

      • TARDIS

        Inspiring even.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Why on earth didn’t we follow their example? We would be done with this shit show by now.

    And miss out on all this glorious authoritarianism? You slay me.

  17. Q Continuum

    “Why on earth didn’t we follow their example? We would be done with this shit show by now.”

    Because the goal was not to deal with the virus, it was to destroy the economy and put a boot on the Nation’s neck.

    • Hyperion

      I think it’s supposed to get rid of orange bad man. It has mostly hurt the lowest income folk. While many of the rest of us can work from home. Democrats showing their luv for the poh peoples. With friends like that, why would you need any enemies?

      • juris imprudent

        Democrats showing their luv for the poh peoples

        As they push to reinstate the full SALT deduction – yeah, that is really helping the poors.

      • Hyperion

        I had one co-worker who whined about that shit all day, with the rest of wondering when we should punch him in the face. First he was all salty about the SALT he lost, then he whined for at least another day that he didn’t get a tax break. I said ‘dude, no one told you to buy a million dollar house and expect a tax break’. Also, you’re claiming 5 kids on your returns. How much more of a break do you want? No one told you to have 5 kids. Just shut up’. He’s a really nice guy, and suppose I hurt his feelings. It’s just unreal what people expect.

  18. Derpetologist

    from the interwebz

    ***
    Obesity, observed in human populations over the ages, has been both admired and reviled.

    However, the Old Testament, the New Testament, early Christian writings and the Talmud regard obesity negatively:

    Judges 3:17: “And he presented the tribute to Eglon, King of Moab. Now Eglon was a very fat man.”

    Proverbs 23:20: “Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eaters of meat.”

    Proverbs 28:7: “A companion of gluttons shames his father.”

    Philippians 3:19: “Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and thy glory is their shame, with minds set on earthly things.”

    The biblical perspective of gluttony was essentially canonized by the fourth-century monk Evagruis Ponticus in his depiction of gluttony as one of the Seven Deadly Sins. Thus, Western biblical tradition presents obesity as undesirable and shameful.

    In an anecdote in the Talmud, we find a tale of what may have been the first bariatric operation. The second-century Rabbi Eleazar, who was morbidly obese, underwent an operation after being given a soporific potion in which his abdomen, or abdominal wall, was opened and numerous “baskets of fat were removed.”

    The recognition that obesity was an impediment to good health and longevity is documented in the writings of ancient Greece, Egypt and India. Hippocrates, the fourth- to fifth-century B.C. Greek physician, wrote:

    The relationship of other diseases to obesity is also ancient and can be dated back to Egypt in the 15th century B.C. The Ebers Papyrus mentions treatments for excess urination, probably secondary to diabetes. Hindu physicians (Charaka, Sushruta and Vagbhata) noted in the second century B.C. that black ants were attracted to “honey urine.” Hippocrates stated: “Corpulency is not only a disease, but the harbinger of others. Those who are constitutionally very fat are more apt to die quickly than those who are thin”

    In certain societies, obesity was often considered a privilege of the upper classes. In fact, it was obviously considered beautiful, as the Rubenesque obese female nudes demonstrated. However, obesity was also the subject of parody, for example, in Shakespeare’s characterization of Sir John Falstaff; as well as freakish, as in sideshow exhibits of fat people. In the 18th century, John Hunter collected anecdotes and specimens of human anomalies, including the portrait of the obese Daniel Lambert, today found in the Hunterian Museum at the Royal College of Surgeons, in London
    ***

    • Hyperion

      “Judges 3:17: “And he presented the tribute to Eglon, King of Moab. Now Eglon was a very fat man.””

      That’s the dude that got gutted, right?

      • Derpetologist

        Yes, by the only left-handed person mentioned in the Bible –

        ***
        Ehud, also spelled Aod, in the Old Testament (Judges 3:12–4:1), son of Gera, the Benjaminite, Israelite hero who delivered Israel from 18 years of oppression by the Moabites. A left-handed man, Ehud tricked Eglon, king of Moab, and killed him.
        ***

        ***
        According to Judges 3:12-30, Ehud was sent to the Moabite King Eglon on the pretext of delivering the Israelites’ annual tribute. He made a double-edged shortsword about a cubit (eighteen inches) long, useful for a stabbing thrust. Being left-handed, he could conceal the sword on his right thigh, where it was not expected. Once they met, Ehud told Eglon he had a secret message for him. Eglon dismissed his attendants and allowed Ehud to meet him in private. Ehud said, “I have a message from God for you”, drew his sword, and stabbed the king in his abdomen. After Ehud stabbed the king, the end of Judges 3:22 reads in Hebrew vayyetze hap-parshedonah, a phrase of uncertain meaning.[2][nb 1] The sword disappeared into the wound and Ehud left it there. He locked the doors to the king’s chamber and left.
        ***

        I guess you could say Eglon (•_•) ( •_•)>⌐□-□ (⌐□_□) got stuck with the bill.

        YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHH!

  19. IRBE

    ‘Rona psychological boredom story of the week: Our youngest son got a lizard when he was 8. 13 yrs later and in his second year of college, my wife has taken over care of said lizard. Well I guess, lizards and snakes ownership has increased during the pandemic which has resulted in “the great cricket shortage” that being crickets are a main food for lizards. So all the crickets are sold out at the local pet shoppe and my wife has to go to the reptile store for crickets. They have limited supply so they recommend feeding the lizard a “pinky”. As the name describes, it is a new born mouse about the size of a pinky finger segment. We put the pinky in the lizard habitat for consumption and the lizard ignores it… maybe he is not hungry. Next morning the pinky is still there. We place the pinky right in lizard and he licks it and walks away and we wait.

    My wife asks, “what are we going to do with this pinky..I can’t believe it is still alive, that is one tough mouse…” So I said to her dead serious..but not really, “well you can’t just let it die!” She looks to me like you aren’t serious but her eyes light up and she says that “..that mouse is one bad ass mother f*cker”. Off to the internet, where it describes how to rehabilitate a pinky. Odds are not good that they survive after 2 days of neglect… First you need Pedialyte for the dehydration. He seemed to improve and is moving around or twitching more after hydrated. We move him out the lizard habitat into a heated box. Then she starts with puppy formula feedings every 4-6 hours around the clockish. After feeding he gets a bath because he is coated in formula. His eyes are still closed but he seems out of the woods..he’s moved from twitchy to fidgety and is walking around and into things. He’s about 50% bigger having gone from 4 grams to 8 grams. Yep, she weighs him every day. Anyway, we are still trying to figure out name since “bad ass mother f*cker” is a kind of a mouthful. I am pretty sure the mouse identifies as female…

    • Fourscore

      Your lizard could live in my garden, eating the mice. I like snakes (in the wild) ’cause they will catch the little critters but I rarely see them in my yard. 1 or 2 a year, some sort of a
      bull snake, I think. Garter snakes are almost never seen here any more. I am seeing a few green spotted frogs this year, they disappeared along with the big brown flying grasshoppers many years ago,

      Snowshoe rabbits are rare, I’ve seen 2-3 in the last 25 years, grouse 1 or 2 a year along the road, deer are bordering on nuisance however, being really scarce back in the ’40s/’50s.
      Chipmunks used to be plentiful but none around my house, not in the wood piles, garden, etc. I should be happy, I guess.

      • IRBE

        Thanks for the offer. This lizard shuts down at temps below 80F. He might have a hard time with your winters.

        Over the years so many crickets have escaped that I believe our micro eco system has been indefinitely altered. I would say why do you need to buy crickets, when I can hear thousands just outside. I think my son tried to catch crickets when he was younger but it was easier to just have mom buy them.

    • UnCivilServant

      Look on the bright side – even in captivity mice don’t last more than a year or two.

      • IRBE

        Yeah..that’s what we read, 2 year max. We’ve enjoyed had a bunch of pets over the years and losing them is no fun.

      • Chafed

        That’s a great story.

    • Hyperion

      Wait… I heard that if you riot, loot and burn other people’s property, it won’t bother you. But if you go to church, it will get you and you want people do die? Am I missing something?

      • Chafed

        Only that if you are a Democrat who goes to church you can sit as close as you like to other people. See: John Lewis’ funeral.

      • Hyperion

        Those guys are just asking for an ass whooping, are they not? If anyone is unconvinced at this point about their malcontent towards everyone who doesn’t agree with them, that person needs to grow a brain.

      • Chafed

        Amen.

    • beer league keeper

      FTA: “Fast forward to mid-July. Data scientists investigated the experience from the spring. They too found no relationship between the virus and policy.”

      From the data scientists’ paper: “…full lockdowns and early border closures may lessen the peak of transmission, and thus prevent health system overcapacity, which would facilitate increased recovery rates.”

      Give the AIER writers credit for citing the paper, but their conclusion seems different than the authors’.

  20. Annoyed Nomad

    My fitness update: Over the past week I’ve continued tracking my food, targeting protein to be about 40% of my calories. My wife and I went on a 20 mile bike ride – our longest of the year. I only got in one weights workout, but we went on multiple walks. I lost another 1.5 lbs for a total of 6 lbs lost over about 16 days; my wife has lost about 5 lbs. We feel good about our progress.

    • egould310

      Thumbs up!

    • Chafed

      Nice! Now get naked together to check your progress.

      • Annoyed Nomad

        Lol, ok. I’ll tell her it’s a necessary step in the fitness plan.

      • Chafed

        GlibFit approved!

  21. Mojeaux

    One for Mojeaux because she’s been keeping at it.

    I love you so, so much right now.

    • Chafed

      ???

    • Chafed

      I’m guessing those numbers are inflated as part of the panic porn. But… it is going to be grim when the moratoriums get lifted.

      • Hyperion

        Hospitals are getting that sweet gubmint money for the commie virus, so don’t think for a moment they are not going to inflate those numbers.

      • egould310

        Thanks for the article, Chafed. These do keep me motivated to keep it going.

        Regarding real estate; the wife and I are looking to buy a house here in Seattle a year from now. Should be an interesting real estate environment…

    • Hyperion

      And the millions of other people who died of heart attacks and missed cancer surgeries because they were afraid to go to the hospital. All of the lock down asshats, a pox on them and their house.

  22. Derpetologist

    There are times when I think I’d be happier as a mechanic at a rail yard in Wyoming. One of my great grandfathers was a mechanic at a rail yard in Nebraska around 1910.

    Listen to the jingle, the rumble, and the roar. What a shame all the steam engines were retired long ago.

    Fun fact: Wyoming has the highest rate of people who have been married 3 times.

    I heard a story about a rail yard in the 1970s. There was a part with just one track, so if two trains were coming from opposite directions, they’d stop and they’re be kind of a stand off. First, the brakemen would get out and yell and scream and cuss and spit and kick dirt on each other. If that didn’t settle who should give way, the next two older, fatter, balder guys would get out and do the same, until finally the engineers got out and fought like mad dogs.

    • Hyperion

      Sometimes I’d like to be a detective. My analytical skills work for that. That’s why I love those unsolved mystery shows and 48 hours and all that. I’m convinced I’d solve cases most people wouldn’t. And as a bonus, if I get to snuff out at least one antifa bug, it will have all been worth it. Oops, was I not supposed to do that? I felt my life was in danger! Can I get my vacation now?

      I lived in Wyoming. I was a kid, but I still remember it, it’s beautiful there, cold, and there is nothing to do unless you like hunting or the rodeo. I think we were there only one year, or less. May have changed a lot in the past 50 years, but I’m convinced that the further you can get away from any metro areas, the better off you are.

    • Derpetologist

      there’d is what I meant. Typos, I make them. I lived in town once where I swear no one knew how to properly use an apostrophe. Every plural had one.

      I thought about being a detective too. I applied to the Chicago police and got invited to sit for the exam, but left the city for another job. Sometimes I wonder how my life would be different if I had followed through on that. I suspect I would have gotten the Serpico treatment.

      • Derpetologist

        Lovely. What was that Chicago blues one with Moby Dick?

      • Gender Traitor

        That would be this’n – by Steve Goodman, another wonderful singer/songwriter taken from us too soon.

      • Tres Cool

        + You Never Even Called Me By My Name

      • Tres Cool

        Another Public Service Announcement

    • Ted S.

      You could wind up with your legs amputated like Ronald Reagan in Kings Row.

  23. Derpetologist

    old man is still morse code boss

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPsgEdmlUf0

    Morse Code would have been canceled by now if not for technological advance. Morse had a lot of un PC views.

    ***
    Morse was a leader in the anti-Catholic and anti-immigration movement of the mid-19th century. In 1836, he ran unsuccessfully for mayor of New York under the anti-immigrant Nativist Party’s banner, receiving only 1,496 votes. When Morse visited Rome, he allegedly refused to take his hat off in the presence of the Pope.

    Morse worked to unite Protestants against Catholic institutions (including schools), wanted to forbid Catholics from holding public office, and promoted changing immigration laws to limit immigration from Catholic countries. On this topic, he wrote, “We must first stop the leak in the ship through which muddy waters from without threaten to sink us.”[32]

    He wrote numerous letters to the New York Observer (his brother Sidney was the editor at the time) urging people to fight the perceived Catholic menace. These were widely reprinted in other newspapers. Among other claims, he believed that the Austrian government and Catholic aid organizations were subsidizing Catholic immigration to the United States in order to gain control of the country.[33]

    In the 1850s, Morse became well known as a defender of slavery, considering it to be sanctioned by God. This was a position held by many Southerners and others. In his treatise “An Argument on the Ethical Position of Slavery,” he wrote:

    My creed on the subject of slavery is short. Slavery per se is not sin. It is a social condition ordained from the beginning of the world for the wisest purposes, benevolent and disciplinary, by Divine Wisdom. The mere holding of slaves, therefore, is a condition having per se nothing of moral character in it, any more than the being a parent, or employer, or ruler.[37]

    ***

    • Chafed

      He sounds delightful.

    • Threedoor

      I will shoot you through my windshield.

      • Tres Cool

        From the comments:

        Some people call me the space cowboy, yeah
        Some call me the gangster of love
        Some people call me Maurice
        Cause it’s the windshield I love.

  24. robc

    Service Brewing Co Compass Rose IPA. Its an IPA, better than many, worse than many.

    It was serviceable ( sorry). I enjoyed it, but that is the problem with IPAs, being good isnt good enough.

    • Threedoor

      I feel the same way. They are either right or not at all.

    • Derpetologist

      I liked Dundee’s IPA. I think they tried to get it close to the historical style.

      IPAs are OK with Mexican food. Otherwise, I don’t like them. I mean, if it’s wet I’ll drink it, but I’ll take PBR over most IPAs.

  25. Gender Traitor

    I cut Thursday’s lap swimming session short Thursday at the Y closest to my office because the swim team in the neighboring lanes was getting to be a PITA (like swimming through a tsunami,) the guy I had to share a lane with ran into me once, and I got a hole in my swim cap. (I have very expensive hair color to protect, y’know!) BUT I have acquired a better quality cap, and at midnight tonight I’ll make a reservation for Tuesday at the Y closest to my house (which I haven’t visited after work before because it’s on the far side of home from my office.)

  26. Ted S.

    I only got one walk in this weekend, because I had to work Saturday and it rained on and off all day today. 🙁

    Unsurprisingly, didn’t run in to anybody after dinner on a Saturday.

    • UnCivilServant

      That hurricane track looks like it might just buzzsaw up the east coast and hit me.

      Shit.

      • Gender Traitor

        Do you have some place to which you can bug out if necessary?

      • UnCivilServant

        I know people further inland. Some of them are even relatives and liable to let me crash.

      • Gender Traitor

        Good. Please stay safe – all you East Coast Glibs.

        And yes, I DO have a song for every occasion.

      • Rhywun

        love the bombast

      • Fourscore

        Go west, Young Man, Go West!

      • Ted S.

        Is l0b0t still in NYC? He and Rhywun should be more worried than you.

      • UnCivilServant

        I figure they have enough sense to take care of themselves.

      • Rhywun

        A spot of rain and wind. Meh.

  27. Rebel Scum

    Tucker Carlson Preaches At John MacArthur’s Church

    Carlson ranted about people kneeling for the national anthem, mobs tearing down statues, and American intervention in foreign countries. The congregation cheered as he took down leftist positions on free speech, cancel culture, and law and order. For a large portion of the sermon, he just stared in befuddlement, however.

    • Derpetologist

      Damn you, Babylon Bee! I had a Tucker Carlson piece in the works!

      • Tejicano

        They couldn’t wait for you to finish yours so they cobbled one together themselves. They would prefer to steal your published works but they have a timeline to publish to.

      • Derpetologist

        I KNEW IT!

    • Derpetologist

      On a related note, I will say that kneeling for the anthem is the left wing equivalent of not wearing a mask. So it seems to me.

      I mean, the masks does nothing, but it’s the symbolism that’s equivalent.

      • Ted S.

        Except that the left are trying to bully people into kneeling for the anthem.

      • Derpetologist

        They try to bully people in general. Are there things that the right tries to bully people into? Maybe in the past, not so much these days.

        Prayers before football games, maybe? Seems to me that social conservatives have been getting beaten like a rented mule for 100 years.

      • Derpetologist

        the masks *do* nothing, I mean

        Sheesh, too much beer I guess.

  28. straffinrun

    Been doing a lot of one armed pull ups during the pandemic. Do them while seated and in secret mode.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Conducting a “mask debate”?

      • Rebel Scum

        When I mask debate it is only for a few minutes and I always win.

    • Chafed

      Sounds like good cardio.

      • straffinrun

        Thx for article, Chafed. Always good to have a reminder to keep at it.

  29. Tejicano

    On my road to recovery close to catching up to where I was a couple months ago. Sux how long it takes to heal up when one is older.

    This week I’m up to 7 reps in my daily 5 set pull-up routine. I added push-ups last week and the ribs don’t seem to mind so I’ll add a few other things (mostly kettlebells) this week to see how that feels.

    Gettin’ old ain’t for pussies.

    • UnCivilServant

      How do they compare to the actual enemy combatants?

      • Derpetologist

        Not sure. There is a similar urban warfare training ground in Ohio. The hands of the town clock are set permanently to 9:11.

        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camp_James_A._Garfield

        Here is an ISIS body count from a few years ago:

        https://www.wilsoncenter.org/article/isis-losses-the-numbers

        Off the top of my head, I would suspect that an enemy familiar with US tactics and culture and free from the restraints of international law would inflict at least as many casualties as they sustained.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Dated, but recommend Daniel Bolger’s Battle for Hunger Hill.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Wrong. The most hated unit is CIF.

      • Derpetologist

        QUIET, YOU!

        Other acceptable answers: TRADOC, JKO, ALMS, and SFL-TAP

      • Tejicano

        So glad to have all that stuff in the rear view mirror.

    • CPRM

      Uh…

  30. Don did not Escape Spring Training

    NewWife and I hiked for two hours up and down the bluffs as we often do. We tried a new trail where there was almost no one: it was so quiet you could hear your heart beat.

    She just watched some working class reality competition Carhart commercial where in some sort of a finale, who goes home is determined by a competition of bucket-toting sand the man much larger and stronger of the two defeated the woman littler participant, a proud “iron worker.”

    • UnCivilServant

      School children tend not to die from Wuhan.

      • Sean

        Kids are the worst.

    • CPRM

      The other side reads “…and died 80 years later during the Great Leap Forward 4.0”

    • Chafed

      It’s weird she’s buried at the school.

      • UnCivilServant

        They wouldn’t let her be taken out of the building to get treatment, or the funeral.

    • Rhywun

      “We demand to live in a plastic bubble”

  31. Sean

    Dined out again tonight, this time with some friends we haven’t seen since pre shut down.

    Almost normal…

    • CPRM

      I grabbed lunch at Popeye’s and finally tried their spicy chicken sandwich. Meh, the chicken was good but the sauce wasn’t great. Even though the chicken was moist overall the sandwich was kind of dry. Wendy’s is still the top.

      • Rhywun

        Is that the sandwich everyone was raving about?

        I love Wendy’s spicy chicken too.

      • CPRM

        Yeah, it’s the one the internet went crazy over.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Their po’boy was far superior to the chicken sandwich. And there was a shrimp one too. Their quality and menu have been declining for a while.