Thursday Afternoon Links

by | Aug 27, 2020 | Daily Links | 394 comments

Sorry about yesterday folks. SP has graciously allowed me live and even let me get away (this time) with a viewing of her rusty tin can lid collection. Next time, she may test a couple to make sure they’re sharp. On me. I had my head down in coding and prepping for a meeting and forgot about this commitment. It won’t happen again. Today. In other news, I am taking my two boys to Disney World this weekend. Having heard that people are going and actually getting to do all of the rides more than once, I shouldn’t deprive my boys of this chance to experience Disney World like a Make-A-Wish kid would (right down to the mask). Also, the cost of a single day Saturday pass and and a two-day anytime pass were exactly the same. So for only the $100-$200 (not joking) it costs to walk around a Disney park all day, we can come back and try Epcot. So that should be fun.

The Kenosah police chief rolls out the same argument as my dad. “If you weren’t out after curfew, nothing bad would have happened.”

Amazon sells people the privilege of letting the company track their exact position and everything they say, 24×7.

Don’t get me wrong, there is a lot of good science here. Missing from the summary is any variability in the inputs for the global energy balance.

Okay, I’m impressed.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

394 Comments

  1. juris imprudent

    I’m just here to chew gum and piss in Bro’s cheerios.

      • Rebel Scum

        Practice multitasking?

      • Animal

        Why not?

      • Hyperion

        I concur. Because Broketard had it coming.

    • Chafed

      Good job.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Whatever, if that’s your kink I’m not going to hold it against you. Kind of a weird fetish though…

      • SDF-7

        Just wait until it becomes the core of a dossier against Juris…

    • Rhywun

      And you’re all out of gum?

    • pan fried wylie

      Great, until Hyperbole comes in to explain how “1. ” isn’t really “First” because “3:01 pm” includes a “1” which is a disqualifier on even numbered months.

      • pan fried wylie

        Worse, why I got the invalid 1st claim wrong. You’re still not first, just not for my poor reason why.

      • pan fried wylie

        *explains why I got…

        ugh. he’ll pedant you properly, I promise.

    • Brochettaward

      I challenge you to a First-off at 8pm. Loser sucks dick.

      • juris imprudent

        You are as out of luck then as you are now. I’m busy at 8.

      • Brochettaward

        What’s wrong dude, you yellow?

  2. Count Potato

    “”Everybody involved was out after the curfew,” Miskinis said. “I’m not gonna make a great deal of it but the point is — the curfew’s in place to protect. Had persons not been out involved in violation of that, perhaps the situation that unfolded would not have happened.”

    Well, at least it sounds like he’s not taking sides.

      • Count Potato

        That’s some pinned tweet.

      • Shpip

        Boy, Mom’s gonna be pissed when she finds out what happened to her Sienna.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        That was 19 hours ago.

      • Chafed

        I’m looking forward to the details.

      • Hyperion

        They’re taking protester out of their cars?

        Am I to go by the same definition of protesters we’ve been hearing from the media for months now? IOW, rioters?

      • Hyperion

        These brilliant fucksticks in antifa and blm are doing such a great fucking job on police reform.

        The results is going to be that you can either live in a blue city hellscape where you are not safe anywhere and defending yourself is completely prohibited, or you can live in peaceful safe places where if you have a turn signal out, you’ll get surrounded by heavily militarized geared up cops in armored vehicles and will be pulled out of your car like that, if they don’t just decide to push the heat seeking missile button after the call in to see if you have any traffic tickets.

        Great fucking job, you brainless fucking twits. And the media, there has to be a special place in hell for all of them.

      • SDF-7

        With the car having Oregon plates, I lean towards them tracking some “protesters” coming from Portland to share methodology.

        I know the whole “fire in a theater” line is crap — but is incitement to riot actually a crime? Because it seems a pretty straightforward charge against a lot of folks these days.

      • pan fried wylie

        is incitement to riot actually a crime?

        Encouraging a group of people around you to commit a crime has got to be a crime.

        IANAL.

    • Hyperion

      Someone being out after curfew and causing trouble, attacking people? I see that as a good reason to shoot them in the face. That looked like self defense to me. So, fine the kid for being out after curfew, but it was still self defense.

    • R C Dean

      Not addressed:

      Why his police officers were not actually enforcing the fucking curfew.

      I haven’t seen an update on last night in Kenosha. Did anything happen?

      • pan fried wylie

        Marshmallows were toasted, mostly peaceful hymns were hymned, mostly everyone went home safe.

      • R C Dean

        I see a march with vandalism through a different part of Kenosha below.

        Glad they were able to get their Jew-hate on and vandalize a synagogue.

        Also glad the cops stayed away and didn’t try to interfere with their peacefulling by arresting people who committed crimes in public.

  3. Rebel Scum

    Kenosha police chief says deadly shooting wouldn’t have happened if people weren’t out after curfew

    It also wouldn’t have happened if the peaceful protesters were not actually violent rioters.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      And it wouldn’t have happened if the police would do their fucking jobs, the part that’s actually legitimate. Suck it chief.

  4. Shpip

    A voice analysis that offers guidance on your tone.

    Next up, the device automatically calls the cops when you raise your voice to your misbehaving kids.

    “I’ll turn around this car right now!”
    (Sees blue lights in mirror)
    “Why, you little…”

    • Hyperion

      The next version has the wrong think correcting feature.

    • pan fried wylie

      Another reason the FireTV is funneling everything to voice search and another reason not to buy it.

      “I’ll let you watch your movie when you calm down. Just because I couldn’t understand the title until the 5th try gives you no right to scream at me.”

  5. Count Potato

    “Halo also offers a Tone analysis, which has nothing to do with body tone, but rather analyzes the nuances of your voice to paint a picture of how you sound to others. It can let you know when you’ve sounded out of line, weirdly enough.

    The fitness band has two built-in mics to capture audio and it listens for emotional cues. The company says it’s not intended to analyze the content of your conversation, just the tone of your delivery.”

    You talk like a fag and your shit’s all retarded.

    • Shpip

      Y’know, I could get behind this if the device sent a small electric shock to the wearer when xhe was caught uptalking.

      When you make every simple declarative sentence? Sound like a question?

      /annoyedrantoff

      • Sensei

        I’ll join that Kickstarter!

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        You must love NPR?

      • Fourscore

        And Minnesoda.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      *kicks Potato in balls*

      Welcome to Costco, I love you.

    • Hyperion

      Which is exactly what will happen. 20 somethings will be sitting around smoking weed and drinking White Claw and saying stupid shit into that thing and laughing. There’s the true value of that app.

      Sorry, woketards, nudging does not work. If you want obedient drones, you’re going to have to go all Stalin on their ass.

  6. Nephilium

    Assuming no rain over Labor Day weekend, the girlfriend and I may be trying a similar trick at Cedar Point. But there it’s about the same price to get season tickets (which are good for next year as well).

    • UnCivilServant

      You betting all the rain this weekend will mean the skies will be all tuckered out next weekend and stay dry?

      • Nephilium

        We can play it by ear. It’s not like we need to pre-purchase the tickets. Planning on booking the hotel room tomorrow for the island.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      But, he first praised a Packer?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      BU was awesome, But Brett Favre was the greatest Football player of all Time,
      Ask any one whom ever sacked him, Tough as nails, oh and a Good QB,
      Green Bay!!!!!!!

      • Ted S.

        Favre took a dive to let Strahan get the sack record. His OL was rightfully pissed.

  7. Yusef drives a Kia

    It’s gonna get cold, and WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!
    until then, Tall Cans!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The key is to put that off as long as reasonably possible.

      • Rhywun

        Yeah, I usually don’t start drinking until 8 or 9 pm. Wait… what?

  8. Hyperion

    “Amazon sells people the privilege of letting the company track their exact position and everything they say, 24×7.”

    I see the value of tracking steps, calories burned, heart rate etc. But I see no value at all of a body fat tracker. Just get scales and a mirror. Tone of your voice? WTF? Was I nice today? Fuck off!

    • juris imprudent

      Your social-score is debited accordingly.

      • Hyperion

        I’ll be the first with a negative social score. I have goals, damnit!

      • invisible finger

        What if the GPS notices I’m at a BLM peace riot? Do I get credits instead?

      • Hyperion

        Only if you looted and burned stuff.

    • Hyperion

      I think I’ll get it for my wife though.

      ‘Mrs. Hyperion, you are being sassy again! Get your husband a beer and a sammich.’

      • UnCivilServant

        Naw, it’ll have been trained by the diversity department.

        “Speak more truth to power and give that shitlord a piece of your mind, queen”

  9. grrizzly

    If you ever wondered how it happened that suddenly all the media and social media started pushing social distancing non-stop…

    This is from a British government document evaluating options for increasing social distancing. It’s dated March 22, 2020.

    Perceived threat: A substantial number of people still do not feel sufficiently personally threatened; it could be that they are reassured by the low death rate in their demographic group (8), although levels of concern may be rising (9). Having a good understanding of the risk has been found to be positively associated with adoption of COVID-19 social distancing measures in Hong Kong (10). The perceived level of personal threat needs to be increased among those who are complacent, using hard-hitting emotional messaging. To be effective this must also empower people by making clear the actions they can take to reduce the threat (11).

    Responsibility to others: There seems to be insufficient understanding of, or feelings of responsibility about, people’s role in transmitting the infection to others. This may have resulted in part from messaging around the low level of risk to most people and talk of the desirability of building ‘herd immunity’. Messaging needs to emphasise and explain the duty to protect others (12, 13).

    Here’s a list of options:
    1. Provide clear, precise, credible guidance about specific behaviours
    2. Use media to increase sense of personal threat
    3. Use media to increase sense of responsibility to others
    4. Use media to promote positive messaging around actions
    5. Tailor messaging
    6. Use and promote social approval for desired behaviours
    7. Consider enacting legislation to compel required behaviours
    8. Consider use of social disapproval for failure to comply
    9. Develop and mobilise adequately resources community infrastructure
    10. Provide financial and material resources to mitigate effects of measures on equity

    • Gustave Lytton

      There’s nudge libertarianism in a nutshell.

    • Rebel Scum

      We* are being re-programmed.

      *I mean, I’M not…

      • pan fried wylie

        *Some fucking idiot thinks they can stand in the middle of a river and direct it’s flow 90deg rather than drown.

  10. Rebel Scum

    In case you were wondering, Hidin’ Biden is still a lying, loathsome, progjecting p.o.s.

    Biden said, “The problem we have right now is we’re in Donald Trump’s America. You know, to quote Kellyanne Conway, she said, and I’m paraphrasing today, they’re looking for more violence and more destruction because it helps them politically. He views this as a political benefit for him, he’s rooting for more violence, not less, and he’s clear about that. What’s he doing? He’s pouring gasoline on the fire. This happens to be Donald Trump’s America. In Donald Trump’s America COVID is out of control, he’s not prepared for it, he hasn’t responded to it, and he continues to do nothing to deal with it. We have 15 million people out of work. It just is amazing how, if you noticed, they didn’t speak about COVID, and they didn’t speak about any of the reasons why we’re doing what’s happening in Kenosha is happening.”

    I don’t think that is what she said.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      He’s full of shit but reasonably cogent. They must have upped his Aricept dose.

      • juris imprudent

        …and they didn’t speak about any of the reasons why we’re doing what’s happening in Kenosha is happening.

        Cogent you say?

    • juris imprudent

      Quote, paraphrase, plagiarize – Joe has so many problems with things other people say.

      • Fourscore

        I laughed too.

        “What Kellyanne meant to say was…”

      • pan fried wylie

        Pop, fat, hey, you, corn pushup contest.

  11. Count Potato

    From the previous thread:

    “”a new streaming series about an 11-year-old girl defying her family’s outdated traditions by dancing sensually”

    Do I even want to know what this is about?”

    It’s the Netflix show, Cuties.

    • SDF-7

      Well, I’m glad you think of us as cuties — but what Netflix show do you mean?

      (And who’s on first, already?)

      • pan fried wylie

        (And who’s on first, already?)

        juris, keep scrolling. fuckin upsiderdowners.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Eleven year olds are autonomous legal entities but twenty six year olds can’t figure out how to provide their own medical coverage.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m going to start a change.org petition that the show others trans-preteens by failing to show their unique perspective on twerking.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Not just dancing sensually, twerking in a twerking crew (that’s a thing?) made up of similarly young girls. It’s either a bizarrely preposterous premise for a movie or the French really need to clean house.

      • peachy rex

        I’m going with option 2 – France really does have a problem with pedophilia among its cultural & political elites. (Germany too.)

      • Gadfly

        France really does have a problem with pedophilia among its cultural & political elites.

        Yeah, France has issues. I mean, I know this happened all the way back in the 1970s, but the prominence of open supporters in both the intelligentsia and the press for abolishing age of consent laws was surprising.

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      I’ll wait for OMWC’s review.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Top Economism

    Even after the virus that spawned the current U.S. recession is vanquished, the drag on economic growth will persist much longer than widely understood, according to research presented to an influential group of central bankers on Thursday.

    That is because, having experienced the impact of a pandemic once, businesses will change their behavior to account for a perceived increase in the likelihood of another such scourge, Columbia University professor Laura Veldkamp and her co-authors wrote, a phenomenon known as belief scarring.

    The result: lower business investment, fewer jobs, and downward pressure on interest rates that translate to slow growth for years.

    “Our model’s predictions tell us that the ongoing crisis will have large, persistent adverse effects on the U.S. economy, far greater than the immediate consequences,” they said in the paper, to be discussed at the Kansas City Fed’s annual economic policy conference.

    The event, usually held in Jackson Hole, Wyoming, is being conducted virtually this year because of the COVID-19 pandemic.

    The findings sharpen the argument for aggressive and immediate measures to offset the economic impact of the coronavirus crisis on businesses, even if those measures appear to be costly endeavors in the short term.

    Of course they do.

    That is because, having experienced the impact of a pandemic once, businesses will change their behavior to account for a perceived increase in the likelihood of another such scourge, Columbia University professor Laura Veldkamp and her co-authors wrote, a phenomenon known as belief scarring.

    Having seen the gross incompetence of government actors and their malicious “remedies” businesses will lose all faith in central bankers. Maybe even string some of them up. Especially anyone who talks about models.

    • grrizzly

      Given how easily the politicians can ban a previously non-controversial business and how eagerly an aggressively obedient majority of the population supports this, it’s not surprising that some entrepreneurs might be cautious.

  13. DEG

    During his Wednesday night show, Fox News host Tucker Carlson appeared to defend the 17-year-old accused of the killings and said that while authorities “stood back and watched Kenosha burn,” the accused teen tried to “maintain order.”

    “How shocked are we that 17-year-olds with rifles decided they had to maintain order when no one else would?” Carlson asked on his program.
    Carlson was roundly criticized for appearing to praise vigilantism and “justify murder.” He made similarly inflammatory comments about the Black Lives Matter movement earlier this summer.

    Carlson is right. His critics can go fuck themselves.

    • SDF-7

      See also.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Meh, Rittenhouse had no business being out there. It’s irrelevant to his case, but an armed seventeen year old by himself in the middle of a riot is just a really stupid fucking idea.

      That said, I feel no sympathy for the stupid assholes who got shot.

      • EvilSheldon

        Being anywhere near a riot is stupid and dangerous, but circumstances can force one’s hand.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        His wasn’t forced. Attempting to paint Rittenhouse as a model of good judgment by the conservative media is a bad idea.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Is anyone who shows up armed to protect property similarly stupid in your view or is it the fact that he’s seventeen for you?

      • Ted S.

        17, and coming from 20 miles away.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I don’t see a problem with standing up tor others’ property even if you have to travel a bit. You could use a variation of that argument for someone from the same city but a different neighborhood if the travel means you don’t belong there. Legally, though, he certainly put himself in serious jeopardy because of his age.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        If someone wants to take on that task and responsibility, they should fully understand the risks involved and be fully prepared for the repercussions and the possibility of killing someone.

        I sincerely doubt he thought he was going to shoot someone, let alone three people. Nor did he appear to have any kind of support system in place that could help defuse a violent encounter. Who was he there with? What were his goals? Were they achievable? He ended up being the target of violence instead of suppressing it.

        Most adults are not capable of that forethought, let alone teenagers.

      • KibbledKristen

        He needed to take one of Maj Toures classes. Maj teaches about de escalation and conflict resolution as well as gun safety.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Assuming the video and reports are correct, he voluntarily took a stand against evil. He stepped up to protect his community and took some bad fuckers out. It seems like he was originally part of a group but got separated.

        What he did was absolutely risky and dangerous to himself. He should be commended for taking a stand for justice in spite of that danger to himself.

      • DEG

        Yep.

      • R C Dean

        Kinda where I am.

        This is about the unorganized militia doing its duty when the government fails or refuses to do so.

        Either the unorganized milita stands up, or the goons, rioters, looters, and misc. Marxists take control.

      • EvilSheldon

        Who said it was?

        The implication I was trying to make was simply that sometimes the war comes for you.

        So you should have the skills, tools, and infrastructure to ensure that you come out the victor.

        Even if Kyle gets no-billed tomorrow and walks out of the courthouse a free man, he’s going to spend the rest of his life wishing that he’d fucking stayed in that night.

        But wishes are the provence of the living.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Fair enough

      • juris imprudent

        I can’t even imagine the ass-whipping my dad would’ve laid on me for that. Fear the prosecutor and court – are you kidding me?

      • Drake

        It sure seem like they purposely cut him out of the herd and isolated him.

      • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

        Possibly. There’s earlier video where he’s with a group, so I’d like to know how he got separated.

      • slumbrew

        This, maybe?

        He eventually leaves the dealership and is barred by the police from returning. Six minutes later footage shows Mr. Rittenhouse being chased by an unknown group of people into the parking lot of another dealership several blocks away.

        https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/27/us/kyle-rittenhouse-kenosha-shooting-video.html

        Non-ironic props to the NYT for some really good reporting there.

      • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

        I saw that. Some actual reporting. But why did he leave the dealership? Was he alone when he left?

      • R C Dean

        Other details inconsistent with “white supremacist going to Kenosha to shoot some people” include his offering assistance to rioters who got tear gassed, chatting with cops and offering them water, calling the police (probably) after the first shooting (the child molester, I believe), and attempting to surrender after the shooting was over.

      • slumbrew

        This, maybe?

        He eventually leaves the dealership and is barred by the police from returning. Six minutes later footage shows Mr. Rittenhouse being chased by an unknown group of people into the parking lot of another dealership several blocks away.

        https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/27/us/kyle-rittenhouse-kenosha-shooting-video.html

        Non-ironic props to the NYT for some really good reporting there.

      • Drake

        I vaguely remember being 17. I was so idealistic back then it’s hard to imagine now that I’m a cynical old grouch. I was idealistic enough to enlist in the Marines because I really believed. The riots in Kenosha really annoy me now. Back then I would have been out of my mind.

        The kid is right to be outraged – those assholes aren’t just wrecking a city, they are stealing his future.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I don’t think Carlson is saying it is a good idea though, he is saying we shouldn’t be shocked that it happened.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That I agree with.

    • Gustave Lytton

      So ordinary people defending their communities against criminals are vigilantes. And rioter burning down cities are mostly peaceful protestors. Got it.

      • leon

        This is just it. A Vigilante is anyone not sanctioned by government executing violent justice (or any kind of justice i guess). There is a reason why Cops don’t like vigilantes. The thing is, as Tucker says, What do you expect to happen when the people who are “the only ones allowed” to dispense justice against rioters and looters won’t do so?

      • Drake

        “Vigilante” has a bad connotation. When there is no police, they are your best alternative.

      • UnCivilServant

        The main problem with vigilantes is the lack of accountability…

        So how’s that different from the police?

      • pan fried wylie

        When seconds matter the police are just a chalk outline away.

        More to the point than the old version using a longer time? Went to search in case it was already a thing, maybe it is, because the suggestions were all about when a second stimulus….sigh

      • dbleagle

        Bah-zing. UCS from the top rope.

      • Brett L

        I don’t know that an armed neighborhood watch is vigilantism even though they may operate without sanction and attempt to detain or violently discourage criminals operating in their neighborhoods. Where they get a bad rap (and the young man is open to this one) is that they often operate independently without ascertaining what may be pertinent facts about who belongs where and when. I don’t mean to run the young man down. I am of the opinion (and was in the Austin shooting where the long gun carrier was the loser) that carrying a long gun in public is often perceived as a hostile act. It changes the tone of interaction with strangers and groups. I think he made an idealistic mistake, and am glad that he survived it and managed to avoid serious physical harm. Hopefully, he picks his battles and works with others in the future. Reporting to the front lines with your rifle and your guts is not a long term survival strategy without backup.

    • DEG

      Good.

  14. The Other Kevin

    Curious to see how Disney goes. We had a trip planned earlier this year but they closed. I can’t imagine walking around Florida heat in a mask, and the parades and fireworks are cancelled, BUT… I’m sure there are many fewer people and if you want to just hit all the rides, it should be a good time.

    • Hyperion

      Winning hearts and minds. Well, I mean at least democrat politicians and sports leagues.

      • But Enough About My Weird Culinary Fantasies

        Two rounds to the heart, one round to the mind.

    • Rebel Scum

      There were peaceful protests. And then the peace intensified.

    • B.P.

      Hey guys, we took actual, no-shit casualties last night. Let’s double down!

  15. Mojeaux

    I go out almost every day because I take my kid to work and then, because I now have an Etsy shop that has desirable things, I have to mail them. This means being around people.

    Monday I went to a funeral. No social distancing, but masks everywhere. My mother and her 3 sisters’ exasperation was evident.

    Tuesday, I made noises to someone about the masks being ridiculous. Hearty agreement.

    Yesterday, I made noises to someone about the masks being ridiculous. Hearty agreement.

    Today, I made noises to TWO people about the masks being ridiculous. Hearty agreement. Actually, more like DISGUSTED and VEHEMENT hearty agreement.

    From my extensive utterly scientific research, it seems people are getting very resentful. Now, the question is, when does it reach critical mass and everyone just gets a wild hare to stop wearing them–on the same day? (see: collective consciousness)

    • UnCivilServant

      I’m hoping work will drop the “masks whenever out of your cube” rule before I return to the office.

      Either it’s safe to return to the office or it isn’t. If it isn’t we continue to telecommute. If it is, no need for the masks.

    • grrizzly

      People tell me that they like my FUCK SOCIAL DISTANCING T-shirt every single time I wear it in my town where 95% of pedestrians wear face masks outdoors. One guy assumed that people were giving me shit because of the T-shirt. No, the negative reaction is dwarfed by the positive one. Surely, most people who hate the message are too scared to come close to me.

      • pan fried wylie

        thanks to the birds of prey movie, now I want to make a mask that reads

        “I shaved my balls for this? At least I got to skip my beard.”

      • Mojeaux

        I am a coward and do not want to make waves, but it’s becoming increasingly evident that NOBODY ELSE DOES EITHER. No matter what they think or feel, they also do not want to rock the boat. Somebody’s got to. But why do I think it needs to be me?

        Hence, my conviction that a bunch of people are just going to get up one day and, independently of one another, decide, “Not today, Satan.”

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        But why do I think it needs to be me?

        Because good people have a very hard time sitting idly while evil reigns. Sometimes sitting idly is the best choice, but it shouldn’t be an easy choice.

      • Surly Knott

        You need to read “The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas” again.

      • Tulip

        I get the same response to my SOCIALISM KILLS t-shirt.

      • Nephilium

        I got several positive comments about the “This Mask Does Nothing” mask I purchased.

      • But Enough About My Weird Culinary Fantasies

        #metoo.

        Which makes me unreasonably happy, because I suggested the tagline etc., and SP graciously created it.

    • DEG

      Monday I went to a funeral.

      Sorry.

      Unfortunately, at least among what I see, masks are becoming more common in this neck of the woods. I saw two guys walking down my street today, both wearing masks. The percentage of people wearing masks on city streets when I’m Nashua and wearing masks at the gym have been increasing.

      More and more municipalities in New Hampshire are getting mask ordinances. We’ve had a few wins (Piermont, Henniker, Hampton, and Seabrook have shot down mask ordinances), but they’re still being talked about. It looks like Portsmouth will get one Monday with the final vote on the ordinance.

      On the bright side, I found a restaurant in Nashua, based on a recommendation, which is ignoring the mask ordinance. Take-out only though. None of the staff were wearing masks. I walked in maskless. The staff smiled. There was a customer waiting for an order who was wearing a mask. She and I didn’t interact. I plan to pick up food there often.

      • KSuellington

        Yup, here 95% of people are wearing masks outdoors. My wife and kids and I are some of the last holdouts. You should see us walking down the streets, it’s like Moses and the Red Sea. People to into the street to avoid us sometimes (and those that do are almost inevitably healthy looking 20-40 year olds). Fuck that. The kids are learning a valuable lesson in not bowing down to ridiculousness, even if it’s popular. The Emperor’s New Clothes has been read a few times over the last month.

      • Mojeaux

        Sorry.

        Thanks, DEG. She was my 92yo great aunt and she is where she wants to be, so no sorries necessary. I did tell my 75yo mother that she had 20 years left and she groaned and said, “No, please not.” So it looks like, since I have zero things wrong with me besides my extra weight, I may not die at 50, as I grew up believing. Ope, too late. I’m 52.

        ANYHOO. One thing I did learn from this funeral was that I want to be as joyful a person as my aunt. I always loved her dearly even though I didn’t see her often, and the remarks made at the service were…remarkable. Anyway, it gave me something to think about and strive for.

        So back to masks. There is one store (where I mail my stuff) that says, “Masks are recommended,” not “Masks are required.” They also have all their entrances and exits open (unlike Walmart), so maybe they’re trying to be as normal as possible. I may try going in without a mask tomorrow and seeing what happens.

      • DEG

        I may not die at 50, as I grew up believing. Ope, too late. I’m 52.

        🙂

        ANYHOO. One thing I did learn from this funeral was that I want to be as joyful a person as my aunt. I always loved her dearly even though I didn’t see her often, and the remarks made at the service were…remarkable. Anyway, it gave me something to think about and strive for.

        Good.

        About masks: Hopefully your trip goes well. I’ve heard that despite what I’m seeing, some grocery stores around the area are backing off on Lil Rona Panic Theater and are less stringent on mask enforcement. I’m going to use instacart again this weekend for my grocery shopping due to a lack of time, but next weekend I will go to the store and see what happens when I don’t wear a mask.

      • Gadfly

        They also have all their entrances and exits open (unlike Walmart)

        The closing of entrances really baffles me (I’ve seen it at my grocery store and local Walmart). Like, I get it that it allows fewer employees to be required to check that patrons have masks, but it also means that every single customer is passing through the same spot, making it essentially the new potential hot-spot for disease transmission and twice as likely a vector as it would have been had both entrances been kept open. Doesn’t make sense to me.

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      Well, you live in the heartland. You know why they call it the heartland? Because there’s no brain there. Not like us enlightened sciency people in the Bay Area, where our county has upped its game and mandated masks outdoors when you are within 30 feet of someone else. 30 feet, not 6. So we’re about 5x more sciency that you yokels.

      Sarcasm aside, I think masks do some good when you are indoors or even outdoors if in a crowd. Wearing a mask outdoors if I’m passing by someone for a second or two seems stupid though. I don’t think it is a silver bullet, and I acknowledge that there are possible risks with masks too, but I don’t mind wearing it in the right circumstances.

      • Gadfly

        Sarcasm aside, I think masks do some good when you are indoors or even outdoors if in a crowd.

        From the evidence I’ve seen, they do in fact do some good, in that they decrease transmission by ~30%. This makes them mitigation tools, not protection tools as so many people seem to think.

      • R C Dean

        From the evidence I’ve seen, they do in fact do some good, in that they decrease transmission by ~30%.

        Got a link? I haven’t seen any studies showing actual reduced transmission/rates of infection.

      • Gadfly

        Got a link?

        No, sorry. I read about this stuff a while ago and am just operating on memory. The whole COVID thing is not really a concern for me, personally, since I’m in a demographic (millennial) for which it’s no real threat. I wear a mask when indoors shopping and nowhere else.

      • R C Dean

        The “studies” I have seen have all been about the mechanical affects of masks on airflow, droplets, etc., with “models” and speculation on how it might affect transmission. I have not seen a single study that says anything like “this population wore masks in these situations, and compared to this control group, were infected at an X% lower rate”.

        The only study I have seen that looks at actual infection rates was done with surgeons wearing masks, and it found no effect on surgical site infections. That’s apples-and-oranges to mask wearing by the public to reduce respiratory infections, of course.

      • But Enough About My Weird Culinary Fantasies

        I’ve heard this “30%” number as well, but it appears that a doctor with a flashlight can show you from which epidemiologist’s ass this number was pulled. I haven’t been able to find a single study or white paper that supports it, and I’ve been actively looking. Perhaps my Google-fu isn’t great.

      • Hyperion

        I’m just shocked that all these sciency people with their science have not settled this science yet and informed the sheeple that these are the facts and 97% of scientists agree, because science!

        We’re going back to where we came from. Remember when Galileo was canceled? It was a religious matter, an act of faith and authority by the inquisition, that canceled the heretic.

        We’re pretty much back at the same point as we were then. Only it’s the scientists and their propaganda wing and their authority arm, left wing politicians who have replaced the inquisition.

        The next person who utters the term ‘The Science is settled’ or tries to cancel someone else for having a differing opinion and silence debate, should be stripped naked and made to run around the public square while they are pelted with rotten fruit and then locked in the stocks until they renounce their inquisition ways.

    • UnCivilServant

      As a viewer, I have to say – well, duh.

      But since twitter doesn’t work for me, what is it this time?

      • pan fried wylie

        This can be like yesterday’s acronym challenge. Fill 120 words with asshoe.

      • UnCivilServant

        That sounds too much like work

      • pan fried wylie

        Too much effort for no reward, I assumed that’s what twitter is from the comments surrounding the links.

      • KibbledKristen

        You commit a crime, ANY crime, you are no longer “peaceful”.

      • UnCivilServant

        Yeah, that’s just plain stupid. Failure to pay taxes is a crime. It’s also peaceful. Until the marshals kick down your door.

      • pan fried wylie

        And you should feel bad for dragging those poor marshals outta bed, you asshoe.

      • KibbledKristen

        I replied that he should read Three Felonies a Day and do some reflecting.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Steven Crowder is idiot and bootlicker who has an occasional good point. That isn’t one of them.

    • SDF-7

      In this group of misanthropes? The bigger question is “who is not asshoe?” (Besides SP, of course… why no.. I don’t need to see more rusty tin can lids, ma’am…)

      • Gustave Lytton

        *raises hand high*

        Oh, sorry. Though you were asking who was an asshoe.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      What a Moron

    • Brochettaward

      I think Crowder is talking strictly about the rioters and looters. Not like some random person jaywalking.

      • Rebel Scum

        That is my inclination. But the statement is seemingly broad to the uninitiated.

      • KibbledKristen

        He literally says any crime.

      • Brochettaward

        I’d chalk it more up to it being an inartful tweet. I could be wrong, but having listened to the guy enough I don’t think he’s talking about, say, someone smoking marijuana illegally.

      • TARDIS

        When you make a bold statement with a bold quantifier you’re always an asshole to pedants.

        Oops.

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      I like him in small doses, but he’s wrong on this one, or at least painting with too broad a brush.

  16. pan fried wylie

    I had my head down in coding and prepping for a meeting

    FloridaMan to English translation: autofellatio

  17. Rebel Scum

    Because Milquetoast Mike had something to do with, um, something.

    On Thursday, possibly prompted by a letter from alumni and current students, Wisconsin Lutheran College in Milwaukee, Wisconsin, roughly an hour from Kenosha, announced that they had rescinded the offer to Vice President Pence to give the commencement address to their graduating students on August 29.

    Citing “escalating events” as a reason to disinvite the Vice-President of the United States, the college stated:

    After further review with careful consideration of the escalating events in Kenosha, the WLC Board of Regents and the College’s Administration have jointly decided to present a different speaker instead of the Vice President of the United States, Michael R. Pence, at the Saturday, August 29, 2020, commencement.

    • KibbledKristen

      I’d be pissed if I attended a tiny little podunk college had the chance to have the VP of the US as its commencement speaker, and they turned him down. Regardless of politics.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Having stood in formation in shitty conditions so some minor league politico can get their rocks off, I’m meh. Too many speeches are for the speaker’s benefit, not the audience.

      • KibbledKristen

        I have had more than one discussion about who my commencement speaker was. Would like to have been able to say “the VP” (instead of the founder of CSPAN, who no one outside DC has heard of)

      • UnCivilServant

        I was pissed that my school piad President Bubba to be boring.

        The Japanese guy whose name I can’t remember that spoke after him was far more interesting.

      • slumbrew

        Wait, did you go to NU?

      • UnCivilServant

        No, RIT.

        But Bubba collected a lot og graft in speaking fees.

      • slumbrew

        He was the speaker at NU, right after he assumed the office. I ended up delaying my graduation by 6 months, so it wasn’t my graduation – thank god: it was at the old Boston Garden and, per the Secret Service, all doors shut, AC off. In June.

        I’m told it was awful.

        I had Jane Curtain at our hockey rink, that September. It was fine, she was fine.

      • TARDIS

        UnC, are you from Rochester? I guess you went to RIT about ten years after me.

      • Gdragon

        Bubba was upstaged when I saw him too, it wasn’t my commencement but I do remember that it was David Ho that did it.

        I had the distinction of listening to Carly Fiorina at my own. She truly bored the shit out of me.

      • DEG

        The only thing I can remember about my undergrad commencement speaker is that the speaker was a woman.

        I can’t remember a word she said, what she did for a living, or why the school invited her. I couldn’t even tell you want she looked like.

      • dbleagle

        Since high school I have attended zero graduations voluntarily except for my son’s graduate school ceremony. While driving him home from his 8th grade graduation I told him that what he accomplished was nothing. When he actually graduates from something besides high school I will attend if invited. He remembered that. I missed his college graduation because I was busy with invading Iraq so he invited me to his graduate program ceremony on the east coast.

        I asked him what he wanted me to bring and he requested some central Cali wines, venison, elk and quail. I flew the cross continent and was the grill master for the post event party. His friends never had game and were impressed with how good it was. (Quail was browned then baked in a cream, sherry, garlic and paprika sauce.)

        I told him that when any kids he has graduates from college, ask me and I’ll grill again. He remembers that too.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        I skipped undergrad commencement. I think it was Sully Sullenburger that year.

        Wife forced me to go to law school commencement and the speaker was that Dallas police chief who made the circuits after all the cops were shot.

        All I remember is that he was an okay speaker, but my MIL was over the moon about him.

    • J. Frank Parnell

      They’re replacing him with the antifa dude who got his arm shot off.

  18. KibbledKristen

    Coincidentally, I had my head down in coding after a meeting. And trying to figure out why this company built this fucking thing the way they did. Oh, wait – to make tons more money, is why.

    • UnCivilServant

      I don’t know if shell scripting counts as coding, but I was extending a modular file transfer script framework I’d written last year to handle more edge cases (I designed to to be easily updated without risking the working scripts)

    • Brochettaward

      Now ask her what she thinks of the sainted Greg Floyd.

      Seriously, fuck these people. He was a 17 year old being attacked by a mob.

    • Gadfly

      CWAA

      Well, she does have the red rose emoji in her name, which seems to be common among socialists and commies on the twits, for some reason.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    The world sucks, part 8,927:

    I waited to order the bearings and seals kit for my Honda transmission until I got the case split, so I could “make sure” I was ordering the right kit. I just went on to order, and it’s suddenly out of stock, like, since yesterday. GODDAMMIT.

    • Mad Scientist

      There’s not more than one place to order Honda parts from?

    • pan fried wylie

      At least immobile it wont get full of more caked on dust?

  20. Count Potato

    “Here is the verified GoFundMe to support the family of Anthony Huber—the hero who gave his life attempting to take down a gunman in Kenosha & save others. All funds will be sent to Anthony’s partner & stepdaughter.”

    https://twitter.com/gofundme/status/1298743543649857536

    No bias there.

    • KibbledKristen

      Look at the ratio, though. THere may be hope for Americakind

      • R C Dean

        “Who’s going to take care of his wife’s son now?”

        “His wife’s boyfriend.”

    • Sean

      The Twitter responses were pretty good, then I clicked on the gofundme link. Over $100k so far.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        All they need is $6,000,000 and they can rebuild him.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        +1 Steve Austin

      • UnCivilServant

        You forgot inflation. That’s $6million in 1973 dollars.

        Today, it costs $35,013,648.65

      • Gustave Lytton

        Medical inflation would be even higher.

      • TARDIS

        Well the pharmaceuticals alone are going to cost $50 million.

      • pan fried wylie

        Iron Man Mk1 mustve cost atleast half a billion (2008USD) to put together. The Bionic Man is obsolete.

      • UnCivilServant

        I thought that one was made from junk in a cave, thus costing about $15

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I was embarrassed by My GFM response when Wendy died, 100k? wow,
        /Humbly bows again,

    • leon

      I don’t know if it’s an inability for them to see how that looks from the otherside or that they don’t give a fuck.

      • J. Frank Parnell

        “or”?

    • Gustave Lytton

      Where’s the Treasury’s Fincen? And why aren’t they tearing apart Gofundme, Venmo, and Cashapp?

    • Chipwooder

      JFC it’s bad enough that GoFundMe will allow this while forbidding one to raise money for Rittenhouse’s defense, but they’re actively promoting this bullshit?

      • leon

        He’s a hero that tried to “disarm” a gunman. And then Murder him. but you know hero! Black Lives Matter!

      • R C Dean

        Is that the hero that assaulted him with a skateboard while he was on the ground, or the hero with a gun in his hand that charged him while he was on the ground?

      • leon

        Gun in hand. Skateboarder is dead

      • R C Dean

        So that’s the burglar, right? Not the pedophile or the wifebeater?

      • TARDIS

        Skateboarder is Dead

        Worst single ever by the Kenosha Trio.

      • mikey

        Guy just came into town to carry some signs and then check out the Kenosha skate park.

        https://youtu.be/bzwf1LcABXw

    • juris imprudent

      Well at least he was worth something to them.

  21. Gustave Lytton

    Anyone with experience with body worn cameras? Looking at Miufly 128GB model. After these riots, I’m strongly leaning towards being able to record my own POV (to an extent) if needed.

    • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

      Uh, so you’re on PornHub?

  22. KibbledKristen

    This pic came up in my Facederp memories. I thought I looked 1/2-way decent in it, so I made some slight changes to make it more palatable

    https://pasteboard.co/JomaUfm.jpg

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      What a Cutie! You look like my little Sister

      • KibbledKristen

        Thanks, Yufus!

    • pan fried wylie

      Literally worse than Stalin.

    • Rhywun

      Now watch Biden go on Fox.

      • pan fried wylie

        The footage of him riding bareback on that poor little red fox will be an instant classic.

      • pan fried wylie

        NO, look! He found a tiny saddle! I just shit myself laughing!

      • Ted S.

        He’s going bareback on Redd Foxx?

      • Count Potato

        Isn’t he dead?

      • Pope Jimbo

        All Biden will hear is “Fox” and will start looking for some hair to sniff. Actually is pretty funny.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      B52’s anyway, nice!

      • KibbledKristen

        Dagnabbit!

      • UnCivilServant

        I thought you were an aviation nut.

      • KibbledKristen

        My 5 key is sticky – I know what a B52 looks like for crying out loud

      • UnCivilServant

        We’re just ribbing.

        You may want to clean your keyboard.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I watched a few U2s launch from Edwards IRL, That was awesome

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        That’s another plane that is somehow still flying 70 years later. They sure knew how to build em back in the late 40s/early 50s.

      • pan fried wylie

        Now I have to go lookup the keymap for MS FS.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Was expecting the elephant walk and MITO.

    • Mad Scientist

      I love how that giant screaming banshee of an aircraft manages to look so quiescent.

      • KibbledKristen

        Judging by the exhaust, it looks like they run on dehydrated camel shit.

    • leon

      Of course he will. He has to reject the calls to quit until his hand is forced. Then it won’t look like he chickened out, he can say “I wanted to, but my hand was forced”.

    • Plisade

      Don’t tease me. Great God, I hope this is true.

      • Rhywun

        Right?!

    • B.P.

      No way is that horn-frogged tiddledywink going to beat me a crack-the-whip match!

  23. Shpip

    Donks wanted them some riots to affect political change, and they’re getting what they wanted, good and hard.

    • Hyperion

      I’m going to be bold here with this prediction.

      After they lose the election, they will have a reflective moment, that lasts about one day. And then they will collectively declare that it’s because of the old clingers in the party who wouldn’t let them go even farther left. And then they will go farther left.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        One more Bold Prediction, as soon as the EC declres Trump the winner, we get riots x1000,
        don’t just keep your powder dry, keep your ammo period,

      • Mostly Peaceful JaimeRoberto

        And we’ll get the Weather Underground part 2, Electric Boogaloo.

      • Suthenboy

        Where is there left to go?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I’m about as where as you at this point,
        Here we are, Stand,
        Cheers Suthen! glad you still have a home after all the wind Mirth…………..

      • Count Potato

        Hey, are you OK over there?

      • Cancelled

        Gulags

      • westernsloper

        They won’t lose. Well, they might, but they will never admit it and it will be litigated forever.

      • Hyperion

        They will lose. Doesn’t matter if they concede or accept it. They can waste their time up until 2024 and then discover that they have no plan for the upcoming election, again.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The lefties I know are playing it as Trump wanted the riots and is instigating them for political advantage.

      It’s kind of mind boggling.

      • slumbrew

        I used to disregard the “it’s always projection with the Left”. I find that harder to do these days.

      • Hyperion

        Yeah, they did that as soon as they realized that their precious riots is going to cost them the election. No one’s going to buy that. Now they’re going to scold their base for rioting after declaring them to be peaceful? Comedy gold.

  24. Raven Nation

    Carried over from dead thread (any drugs falling?):

    Real Salt Lake’s owner is not happy with MLS: https://www.bbc.com/sport/football/53937541

    The story is mostly about a player brought to tears by the owner’s response and how the players have no power. But, I thought the owner’s comments were interesting:

    “Owner Dell Loy Hansen said he felt “disrespected” by the postponement…Billionaire Hansen said the cancellation would mean he would reduce his level of investment in the club and make redundancies across the business.

    “We’re all sitting here at an organisation trying to build support and love around a team that supports the city,” he told a local radio station.

    “All I can say is they supported other issues nationally. They clearly did not support our city or our organisation. That’s fairly clear.

    “It’s a moment of sadness. It’s like somebody stabbed you and you’re trying to figure out a way to pull the knife out and move forward. That’s what it feels like. The disrespect is profound to me personally.”

    • Bill (Door) Baggins (a Skellington)

      This is only a part of why my interest in MLS and RSL has waned in recent years. I used to attend multiple matches a season, but haven’t been in several years. I think I’m calling it on most sports.

    • Rhywun

      All of those teams are on a razor’s edge financially and then the players pull this shit. The BBC seems to think the owner should just reach into his swimming pool full of gold coins to keep the team afloat. Yeah, that’s not how it works.

      • Ted S.

        Considering how many of the EPL teams have deep-pocket foreign owners, I’m not surprised the BBC expect the same in MLS.

        I can’t wait for the next oil crash to turn Man City into another Leeds.

  25. leon

    I wonder if there are any boards/ CEO’s now shitting their pants thinking: “We endorsed black lives matter, and now it is loosing support for being violent barbarians looting and rioting…”

    • Gustave Lytton

      I sure hope so.

      I feel like smashing my own CEO’s face down into it and putting my knee on his neck for 8 minutes, for the divisivity and exclusion crap he has been endorsing and allowing to run rampant. If he really feels he’s such a racist, there’s the exit, dickface.

      • Rhywun

        Cowards, the lot of them.

      • Raven Nation

        Like old the middle-aged, white, male academics demanding their universities only hire minorities.

    • R C Dean

      Interesting set of photos. Sure looks like he tried to fake “hands up, don’t shoot” right before pulling a gun. And the kid definitely got his shot off in the nick of time – that last photo clearly shows the handgun coming to bear on his head.

      • Drake

        Yes – he was going to execute the kid.

      • slumbrew

        I’ve watched the video – it’s a bit less clear what his intent was: he did the hands-up, then drops his hands and moves in Kyle’s direction after that; it didn’t strike me as the move of someone trying to escape or de-escalate. I suppose it could have just have picked a poor route to exit the situation, but it was a _really_ poor choice.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        There was no shortage of those that night.

      • R C Dean

        he did the hands-up, then drops his hands, pulls his gun, and moves in Kyle’s direction after that, and gets shot while pointing his gun at Kyle’s head

        I think his intent is plenty clear.

      • B.P.

        The doctors did a helluva job repairing that dude’s arm.

    • creech

      Is there video of the two guys being shot who were killed by Rittenhouse? The elbow dude shooting appears justified if it stands alone, but what about the two previous shootings?

    • creech

      I wonder what Biden would have said if Cooper asked him “What about Aleppo?”

      • Fourscore

        Who am I and why am I here?

      • TARDIS

        That would be good. It think this would be better. “How many innocents were killed in the Armenian Genocide?” But then, what would Trump know about that either?
        *Sigh*

    • OBJ FRANKELSON

      Ya know…. A civics/Constitution quiz bowl event would be an interesting addition to the presidental debate…

  26. sloopyinca

    I’m going to be in Addison Texas tonight. Any DFW glibs want to grab a beer?

  27. Suthenboy

    I have seen no mention of riots in kenosha last night
    Anyone have info?

    Checked on neighbors spent day with chainsaw clearing roads and driveways
    We are the only ones that had no disaster
    Young Pregnant couple With another baby was in travel trailer for air condition cus power outage
    Large pine mashed it flat – not a scratch on them

    • R C Dean

      I have seen no mention of riots in kenosha last night
      Anyone have info?

      Looks like there was some kind of march through a more residential neighborhood, with vandalism of a synagogue (of course) and a church. See comment 17.

    • Bill (Door) Baggins (a Skellington)

      That’s very fortunate. Glad you’re safe too. Can’t imaging being in a travel trailer during something like that.

      My uncle is in Kilgore, TX. Messaged him this morning as the edge of the storm was over them, but as far as I know, they’re fine.

    • DEG

      I’m glad you got through the storm OK.

    • KibbledKristen

      Glad you’re OK and out-and-about with the chainsaw

    • KSuellington

      Right on. Glad that you and yours made it through safe Suth.

    • TARDIS

      Glad you’re all good. Also, pines are forbidden near the house.

    • hoof_in_mouth

      I saw a video of a bunch of cars in a residential neighborhood causing a ruckus. A guy came out of a White House and fired some shots in the air and everyone got back in their cars and moved on. Sorry I can’t find it at the moment, was from last night.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Jeez! Six lucky people (esp. the young family).

    • westernsloper

      Glad you and the neighbors are all ok Suthen!

  28. Yusef drives a Kia

    WTF?
    JUSTICE WILL BE SERVED: ‘Enough Is Enough’: CovCath Attorney Lin Wood Offers to Help Kyle Rittenhouse For Free After GoFundMe Shuts Down Legal Defense Fund.
    https://www.informationliberation.com/?id=61681

    • TARDIS

      I know that’s awesome, but at first glance I had a Dexter intro flashback, and grossed out.

  29. Pope Jimbo

    So I ran across a few different articles today from conservatives huffing about the Dems supposed plans to offer statehood to Puerto Rico and DC if they win in November. I’ve been busy lately so I haven’t been paying close attention to things (also not paying close attention in hopes of controlling blood pressure), but have any of you heard this?

    The Dems feel that by giving DC and Puerto Rico statehood, they would get 4 more Senators and a few more Congressites who would reliably vote for Team Blue.

    For the most part, I just shook my head and wondered how the same people who have spent 3 years talking about the evils of the Electoral College now are arguing that they should really just pack it instead of abolish it.

    If they had been arguing that the EC was mechanically flawed in some way before, I wouldn’t be so nonplussed at their new plan. But they spent a lot of time arguing that the EC was morally wrong.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Ends >>> Means

      • dbleagle

        GOP should counter with keep the DC area down to the area immediately around the National Mall, Congress, WH and SC and give the rest back to Maryland. No Constitutional issues unlike their statehood dreams.

        Bonus joy from listening to Maryland arguing like a divorcing couple over who has to take the poorly trained dog why they shouldn’t have to choke down that feces frittata.

      • KibbledKristen

        The NIMBYism coming from MD if that were to be the case would be delicious to behold.

      • R C Dean

        “Isn’t one crime-infested rathole enough?”

        I honestly don’t know what DC is like these days. When I was in and out of there decades ago, there were some seriously bad neighborhoods.

      • SUPREME OVERLORD trshmnstr

        I never left the national mall area and surrounding businesses/govt buildings/law firms. I still felt under prepared without my EDC in those nicer parts of town.

      • KibbledKristen

        I used to work on Bolling AFB while living near the National Cathedral. I sometimes had to take the bus from the Base to the Anacostia Metro. That was some kinda neighborhood.

        There was the time I got on the wrong bus and ended up winding around from Bolling to Deanwood. Most scared I’ve ever been.

      • Viking1865

        I took the wrong exit once, ended up in some really bad place in Anacostia. Got turned around. Saw a cop at a gas station, pulled up next to him. Said “Uh officer, I think I should get back on the interstate.” Dude looks up from his terminal and says “Oh yeah absolutely, follow me I’ll lead you back.”

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I got lost in Anacostia in 89.

        Cop pulled me over to tell me to leave before I got shot.

      • whiz

        Reminds me of the time I took a wrong exit and ended up in East St. Louis. Immediately tried to get back on I-70, but there were no signs directed to the on-ramp. Manage to figure it out from the layout of the streets, but there were some curious people watching, probably wondering what we were doing there.

      • Hyperion

        I got lost in West Baltimore once when I had to get off somewhere for a detour and must have made a wrong turn. No GPS or cell phone that had maps at that time. I knew enough about where I was that I knew which general direction to go in to get out of there.

        It looks like a post apocalyptic wasteland. No exaggeration. Just block after block of boarded up row homes and a bunch of dudes standing around on street corners, sitting on the steps of boarded up buildings, or just walking around in vacant lots or in the street. I just kept going the way I was going, did not stop at any lights or stop signs, just slowed down enough to see there was nothing coming. One of the worst neighborhoods in the country.

        Also remember one time a long time ago that me and a friend got lost in Cincy in much the same way and wound up in a really bad area. I had no idea where I was or how to get out of there. People would just walk out in the street and wouldn’t move and just glare at you, so I’d just keep driving and they’d slowly get out of the way. My friend was scared half to death, I think he peed his pants. That was 40 years ago, I can’t even tell you how dangerous it was or what, but it was definitely the ghetto.

    • Urthona

      They will not have the political power for either.

      It’s also not clear whether Puerto Rico wants to become a state. One side refused to participate in the last election.

  30. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Sounds like elbow guy has been mouthing off about what his intentions were:

    http://acecomments.mu.nu/?post=389868

    Sounds like it was self-defense after all.

    • TARDIS

      Chuck Norris just announced that he’s getting a Kyle Rittenhouse tattoo.

      LOL.

      • SandMan

        Now that’s funny, thanks!

    • R C Dean

      Hearsay. But given his actions are consistent with intending to kill Kyle, I think he intended to kill him.

      Good work by the docs, though. He’ll probably be jacking off in a month, maybe two. I suspect a .308 round would have taken the arm off.

      • TARDIS

        If the bullet went through his throat, the world would be a better place. Sorry, not sorry. He should be handcuffed to his bed.

      • Drake

        They could at least pretend to be even handed and charge him on the illegal weapon.

    • Chipwooder

      You know, perusing the comments, someone hypothesizes that the bald sex offense’s head wound looks a mite small and neat for a 5.56 bullet at close range. More like, say, a pistol round. Maybe massive arm wound guy, who likely was the guy who shot first in the entire episode, accidentally capped his buddy.

      • Urthona

        So we have no eye witness of the first shooting?

      • Viking1865

        There is video. The NYT actually had a very good, unbiased full breakdown of lots of different footage.

      • Chipwooder

        Theres video, but it’s hard to tell much other than Rittenhouse was running, several guys (including dead guy #1) were chasing him, and someone in that group fired a pistol. That sets of a flurry of shots and #1 goes down. Hard to say if all the shots after the first one were Rittenhouse or whether the other guy was shooting too.

      • Viking1865

        https://twitter.com/MrAndyNgo/status/1298485363795623936

        I don’t think so. Kyle is running, Pedo Commie is chasing him, a pistol is fired on the left side of the screen, and Pedo Commie takes quite a few steps, then Kyle turns and fires several times.

        I did think it was weird that a point blank rifle headshot didn’t do more visible damage.

      • EvilSheldon

        Normally at that distance I would have expected a hair frisbee, but who can say? Bullets do weird shit.

      • Viking1865

        A Gun Boomer is right now writing out a post pointing out that if Kyle R had been carrying a Real Rifle, like an M14, then Pedo Commies head would have exploded and he would have been instantly dead instead of instantly incapacitated and completely out of the fight.

  31. Pope Jimbo

    In local news that is probably only of interest to Tundra and I* The Suburbs will release a new album this fall.

    *My kids will also care because this means they will have to listen to the old Suburbs albums in the car now.

  32. Pope Jimbo

    This story is sure to warm your non-profit eco-nut heart

    Long and short of it is a mine in Minnesoda is going into bankruptcy and that is a problem for local eco-nuts. A while back they used threat of litigation to get the mine owners to set aside 240 acres of land for “prairie restoration”. The land belongs to the mine and it sounds like the mine paid for most of the maintenance and other stuff. The eco-nuts just pranced around and were happy about all the good they were doing.

    Now that the mine is in bankruptcy, the gravy train is gone and the eco-nuts are worried about what will happen to their 240 acres. Who will do the work (and pay for it)?

    Lots of handwringing in the story, but not once has this group thought of ponying up money and buying the land themselves.

    • UnCivilServant

      I was hoping you were going to say the econut grifters went out of business.

    • Drake

      Trump just won the state.

      • SandMan

        Sure hope you’re right.

    • Chipwooder

      Whoopsie daisy

  33. KibbledKristen

    Anyone else have a big increase in scam calls? My gorram phone is ringing off the hook with spams & scams. Like, 6-7 per day.

    • Count Potato

      Yes, they died down a while back, now they are back up.

    • dbleagle

      My scammers are speaking Chinese. Multiple calls per week despite blocking numbers.

      • UnCivilServant

        They’re all from spoofed numbers, so blocking does nothing.

    • Mojeaux

      I’ve been having them for several weeks, though not that many per day. Maybe 3-4. They all ask for me by first name and I say, “Who’s speaking, please?” They either launch into their spiel or hang up. I presume they’re trying to get me to say “yes”.

      • KibbledKristen

        I almost never answer calls from numbers not in my phonebook, but the one or so I have answered were immediate hangups.

      • Mojeaux

        I’m a business so very often potential clients call me as first contact. I’ve been hired many times because I have a phone number, I answer the phone, and I talk with them a while.

  34. Brochettaward

    So, with the Rittenhouse shooting, is there any evidence yet showing that the people shot weren’t “protesters?” I mean definitively, besides the video of them acting in a mob attacking Rittenhouse. It goes without saying that I would strongly bet that the convicted felons (it’s my understanding that two of the 3 were felons) and the pedophile weren’t there to act peacefully, but does anyone have proof of that?

    • R C Dean

      They were obviously not there to act peacefully, on account of they didn’t. Not sure what you are asking.

      • Brochettaward

        I’m looking for something along the lines of they are on video starting a fire, breaking windows etc. I mean, it’s pretty damn clear from the video that they are acting in a mob to attack someone else which should be evidence enough, as you said. But it isn’t enough for some people.

      • R C Dean

        But it isn’t enough for some people.

        Nothing would be enough for those people. Don’t waste your time.

        Rittenhouse was cleaning up graffiti during the day, offering help to tear-gassed “protestors”, chatting with cops, tried to run when shit went sideways, was assaulted by the second guy he killed, and capped the third guy milliseconds before he was going to take a round to the head. The first shooting is the only one that is even remotely questionable.

      • Ted S.

        It’s Brochettatard being a contrarian again.

    • Drake

      You mean where they lived, worked, worshipped, etc? You expect a journalist to do all those inquiries?

      I’ll bet $1,000 none of them are from Kenosha, WI.

      • Chipwooder

        I bet the same thing, but I was wrong. Sex offender guy lived in Kenosha and skater boi lived in a nearby town that looks like it’s a out 10-15 miles away. The third guy I believe is from Milwaukee, so fairly close by as well.

      • Brochettaward

        Well, the narrative being spun around Rittenhouse is that he was an outsider because he lived 20 miles away.

      • Chipwooder

        Oh, absolutely. I’m just saying I was guessing those guys were from rather far away and they weren’t.

      • R C Dean

        I don’t see what difference any of that would make. Given what we now know, and what we can see on video.

  35. Yusef drives a Kia

    Am I the Asshole if I make a customer wait til tomorrow to answer the “emergency” they still won’t pay for? this is an on going problem, and I need to get paid for the first part, before I begin the second

    • Count Potato

      Why won’t they pay?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I bid to swap a working unit with a non working unit, turns out, the other unit is non working, this is not my problem. I can fix it, but you pay me for my original bid first,

    • R C Dean

      No, you’re not the asshole.

    • Drake

      Why would you ever deal with a customer who won’t pay?

      • Mojeaux

        ^^^That.

        No pay, no go.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        until now, no problem being paid, it’s all commercial stuff, but I’m getting poor communication, so I wont move til i do get at least A payment

    • Sean

      No

    • TARDIS

      That poor bastard is going to be meme king for weeks.

      • Chipwooder

        I almost feel sorry for him since the chiron isn’t his doing.

        However, he is a CNN reporter so odds are he’s worthless.

    • DEG

      I like it.

    • Brochettaward

      Tell the Ravens we’ll give into their demands when they turn over the white suit.

      • Chipwooder

        Kicking it old school!

        In realit, much of that list is fine, though the boilerplate stuff at the beginning is annoying. I just don’t react well to anyone telling me that I MUST do anything- unless they’re paying me.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Yeah, I actually appreciated an organization actually writing out *mostly* reasonable steps.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Actually…

      • R C Dean

        Well, the first sentence is mostly bullshit.

        The second sentence of the second paragraph is bullshit, which splashes on the next sentence and the sentence after that.

        The bullets aren’t terrible, but the stink of “racial justice” hangs over the whole thing.

        Shut the fuck up and play football.

      • dbleagle

        No wonder there are problems with voting in Maryland if you have register to vote at each level of elections.

        I don’t handle blackmail well so screw the Ravens.

    • B.P.

      We demand the impoverishment of our industry.

      • Brochettaward

        I keep hearing talk about this wonderful platform athletes have to spread their message, and it just makes me want to see that platform go away. I’m past the point of just being ok if they shut-up and play (which isn’t going to happen, anyway). I always knew athletes were entitled cunts, but now they are the worst sort of entitled cunt you can be and that’s just a line too far.

      • Chipwooder

        I don’t like being lectured by fabulously wealthy athletes that they are horribly oppressed because they’re black and ordinary middle class office-drone me is so completely privileged compared to them. Bullfuckingshit.

        When we lived in Florida, my wife had a close friend whose brother had lived, shall we say, a checkered life. He had a long term meth addiction amd had served time on several occasions. Was a rail thin guy with a shaved head, goatee, and a shitload of prison tats. That guy got harrassed by cops absolutely everywhere he went, white or no.

    • Gustave Lytton

      And the first reply is defending the Brianna Taylor killing.

      I hate everyone.

    • Brochettaward

      That needs to be mashed up with clips of Lemon calling rioters and looters peaceful protesters.

      It’s amazing to me that someone could shamelessly claim that it all needs to stop not because it’s, you know, wrong, but simply because it’s hurting Democratic polling numbers.

      • Viking1865

        For Don Lemon

        “Morally wrong” and “hurts the electoral chances of the Democrats” are the same thing.

    • R C Dean

      A clear example that the left/Dems cares only about power, and nothing else. The only thing wrong with the rioting is it interferes with their quest for power. The killings, beatings, arson, theft, destruction of people’s livelihoods and entire cities, none of that matters to them.

    • Hyperion

      Lemon is dumber that a shit pile.

  36. The Hyperbole

    What are the details on the pedophile guy from the shooting? He gets labeled “Sex Offender” or “Pedo” but no one ever mentions what he did. My cynical side is guessing he was a 19 year old fucking his 16 years old girlfriend not a little league coach giving private “batting practice.”

    • Bob Boberson

      According to Twitter (for what it’s worth) he was a class 3 sex offender, meaning that he either had sex with someone under 12 years of age or raped someone whom was unable to consent (drunk/high). Not air tight but if there is any validity to this, it’s worse than a ‘statch charge.

    • Viking1865

      Dude was 5 foot 3. Only girls that would fuck a dude that short would be children.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Worse than Jonestown

    Those gathered to watch Mike Pence’s Republican National Convention speech largely shirked wearing face masks despite the vice president having touted how they slow the spread of coronavirus just weeks ago.

    Pence addressed a crowd in person at the Fort McHenry National Monument in Baltimore, among which only a few were seen to be wearing masks.

    While they sat during his speech, spaced apart, attendees were seen shoulder-to-shoulder as they mingled and posed for photos afterwards.

    The VP was seen shaking hands with one attendee and fist bumping another. He was not wearing a mask himself as he greeted members of the crowd.

    During his speech, Pence defended the Trump administration’s response to the COVID-19 crisis and said America is a “nation of miracles,” as he spoke of his optimism that a coronavirus vaccine will be produced in the United States by year end.

    Optimism? But CNN told me America is a shithole. Doomed to failure and decay unless Trump and Pence are kicked out of the White House.

  38. KibbledKristen

    What does it mean when you turn on your LCD TV and the brightness immediately dims without pushing any buttons?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Settings/power saving/ Screen brightness

      • KibbledKristen

        Yeah I turned it all the way up and it had no effect (it kind of just washed out the color, but the overall dimness was still there). The dimming just happened without my doing anything, though. I didn’t accidentally hit any buttons.

        Could it be the cable signal and not the TV?

      • Count Potato

        Try a source that isn’t cable — DVD, USB-stick, etc.

      • KibbledKristen

        Oh now that’s interesting – the brightness came back up when I switched to a new input. When I went back to the original input, it automatically dimmed again. WTF setting is that??

      • R C Dean

        Sometimes my TV does weird shit after it gets a software update. I generally have to run through the menu and check that my settings haven’t been effed up.

        Nothing like that, though.

      • KibbledKristen

        I think it must have been some kind of reset after a software update – I never changed the energy saving settings myself.

      • KibbledKristen

        Found it! Was hiding itself under layers of settings.

    • UnCivilServant

      It means you have to find the camera and disable it. In addition to turning off the brightness options as usef says.

  39. The Late P Brooks

    Headline:

    “Amazon protestors set up guillotine outside Jeff Bezos’ home”

  40. The Late P Brooks

    Whoops- misfire. Let’s try that again.

    Headline:

    “Amazon protestors set up guillotine outside Jeff Bezos’ home”

    He should have a bunch of drones drop Twinkies on them.

    • The Hyperbole

      The blade looks like it’s about an inch thick and made out of cardboard or plywood, It’s an effigy (I know that’ a word for people but I don’t know the equivalent word for objects) of a guillotine at best.

    • UnCivilServant

      It doesn’t look like it should fly.

      • The Hyperbole

        It’s filled with helium.

    • KibbledKristen

      That looks cool! The lack of windows is a bit disconcerting

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Windows?

        We don’t need windows where we’re going.

      • UnCivilServant

        You’re building Oracle Database Servers?

    • R C Dean

      It gets better fuel mileage than my car.