Music Theory Primer for Beginning Guitarists: Chords by Key & An Introduction to Grinding Out a Song

by | Sep 24, 2020 | Fun, LifeSkills, Music, Pastimes | 153 comments

Buckle up, Buttercup!  So much good stuff will be covered in this installment.  Let’s skip the pleasantries and dive in.  On three?  (/makes eye contact with each Glib)  And a One, and a Two, and a…

Covered Previously

Major & Minor Chords

Practicing Techniques for Guitarists

 

Chords in Any Key

Remember this diagram? 

 

And ‘member that a typical chord consists of the root, or 1, being played simultaneously with the 3 & 5?  …and that a major chord contains the major 3rd while a minor chord has a minor, aka flat, 3rd instead?  If not, review the Major & Minor Chords article linked above.  Done?  Good.  Onward!

You also know that after the 7, the scale starts over at 1, and thus the image below should make sense… 

 

Ok, I really need your attention now.  What we’re going to do is make every possible 1-3-5 chord using the major scale notes, or the notes in the major key.  Not all chords using the notes within the major key will be major chords.  Let that sink in.  We’ll be using only the notes of the major key (limiting things to only those notes within a given key is called, Diatonic), but doing so will create major and minor chords, as well as one diminished chord.  I know, I know.  Stay with me.  Take a look at this… 

 

The colors are for instructional purposes only.  So, what do we have here?  The Roman numbers in the leftmost column are standard chord notation.  Capitals signify major chords.  Lower case is for minor chords.  The degree symbol means the chord is diminished; we’ll get to that one in a bit.  In each row, there are 3 highlighted cells, which are the notes within the major scale that make up that row’s particular chord.

In the previous theory installment of this series, I didn’t point out something when we looked at chord construction.  I’ll do so now.  Notice that for the interval in the root (I) chord between the 1 and the 3, there are 2 whole steps.  And also notice that the interval between the 3 and the 5 is only 1 and a half steps.  That interval pattern makes up a major chord:  2 whole steps to the 3, 1.5 steps from there to the 5.  But for a minor chord those intervals are reversed:  1.5 steps to the 3, 2 whole steps to the 5.  The relevant diagrams are shown again below for your review.  

Back to the “Diatonic Chords in Any Major Key” chart.  Let’s look at the 2 chord, the ii.  As denoted by the lower case, it’s a minor chord.  But why?  Well, you know a minor chord has a flat 3rd, but the “3” isn’t even highlighted in that row.  What gives?!  Don’t freak out, but for this ii chord, we need to think of the 2 as being the 1.  That’s right, when we’re talking in terms of a chord, the root note of the chord is always 1, regardless of which note that might be within its relevant key.  Confused?  “You will be.”  Anyhoo… So the ii chord… it follows the minor pattern of 1.5 steps then 2 whole steps, and that’s why it’s a minor chord.  Are you seeing it?  Maybe this will help… 

 

The iii chord also has the minor pattern.  The IV goes back to the major interval pattern, as does the V.  The vi is obviously minor.

The vii° is the diminished chord – and thank The Creator there’s only one oddball!  Can you guess what makes it diminished?  What about its pattern is different from the minor and major chords’?  Yup, it has a flat 5th!  Technically, it might seem, it’s a minor diminished, but we just call it a diminished chord.  The term kinda has another meaning when talking about intervals.  So it goes.

Wow, we did it!  Now you can impress your local drum circle with some diatonic splainin.  But wait!  There’s more!  Here are all the diatonic chords in every key.  Full disclosure:  I looted this pic and didn’t bother to verify its veracitah. 

Grinding Out a Song

An Introduction

I know I said in the first installment that this next theory article would be about open & barre chords and some improvising, but I can’t get there just yet.  Since the focus of this series is supposed to be about theory for beginning guitarists, the diatonic chords discussion above seemed like the next logical step.  I will get to that other shizzle, pinky swear, and only in the context of music theory as it applies to playing your axe.

Yet I can’t leave you without a practical application exercise.  So let’s utilize our expanding chord theory for grinding out a song (transcribing it, figuring out how to play it, how it was written, what makes it tick).  Do you recall “Knocking on Heaven’s Door” from the how-to-practice article?  Excellent.  Quaere:  From looking at its chart below, in which key is it written and are the chords diatonic?

 

A good first assumption is that a song starts with the 1 chord of the key in which it was written.  If it doesn’t, it’s most likely modal, and I hope this series will eventually get to modes.  But it most likely will, for most songs.  Heaven’s Door starts with the G major chord and so will we.  Looking at the jacked “Chords in All Major Keys” diagram above, lo and behold! there is a row starting with G in the I column.  Phew!  Now let’s look at all the other chords in the song – D, Am & C – are they also in the G key’s row?  We have a winner!

[I know you’re secretly wondering if there really is a “Key of Rock.”  Well, you just found it.]

But they can’t all be that easy.  Such would be boring.  I know not everyone is a fan of U2, but The Edge is/was? good.  (Squirrel!  If you’re into electric you really should learn his pioneering* techniques using a dotted 8th note delay, particularly on “The Joshua Tree” album.)  Take a gander at “Running to Stand Still”…

 

Refer to our handy hot chart and start the process.  I’ll wait.

/taps foot impatiently

Is there a problem?  It’s that pesky C major inversion, the C over G, innit?  The C chord in the key of D is supposed to be a C#°, not a straight C.  Is there another key that contains all of the song’s chords – D, G, A & C?

/tries not to look over your shoulder

Well, the chorus starts with an A major, so maybe the chorus is in a different key.  (/checks)  Nope, the key of A doesn’t contain a C major chord.  Does any key contain both the A major and C major chords?  Negative.  Hold on, the key of G contains a C major chord.  So we’re closer.  But the short answer is, that’s Rock n Roll, baby.  A longer answer is that the song’s key is in fact D, and that throwing the C major in there creates tension – it sounds off, but cool – and resolves to the G major, which is diatonic.  Meanwhile, Bono continues to sing in D despite the C natural in the chord.  Tension and Release:  a subject for another day, when we finally get to improvising.

So what does it all matter?  This knowledge will ultimately help you write, grind out songs, improvise…  For Heaven’s Door we now know we can solo to that song in the key of G, no worries.  For U2’s Running we know we can solo in D, but should stay away from the key’s C# note when playing over the C/G chord.  For starters.

You can try this out on some songs you like to strum.  A good one might be Pink Floyd’s, “Comfortably Numb”.  How many different keys are used in the song?  Hint:  Bm is the relative minor, key and chord, of D.  This means that they share the exact same key notes, so you could start by looking at the key of D.  And watch out!  That pesky C natural just might show up again.

Ok, next time I *will* cover Barre Chords, as a springboard to, what I call, Back of the Envelope Fretboard Navigation.  Tips n Tricks!  And this should lead to our first improv discussion and maybe some riffs, complete with video (only cuz I think such would be easier comm for moi) – I’ll have to get with SP on how to do that :/

Now practice, practice, practice 😛

*something something Flock of Seagulls something something

About The Author

Plisade

Plisade

Born in Cali. Served in the Marine Corps for Desert Storm. Now living around Nashville, TN. Honorary Degree in Darwinian Expediencies, MCRD Hollywood.

153 Comments

  1. UnCivilServant

    What do I do if my ear can’t tell the difference?

    • Gender Traitor

      Try drums instead? Can be very therapeutic.

    • kbolino

      As with most things, practice. As a fellow tone-deaf individual I’ve found that my ability to discern tones is a function of how carefully I listen to music and how often.

    • Plisade

      My grandfather was tone deaf. Music annoyed him.

    • blackjack

      Buy a “fakebook” and put your fingers where the dots are?

    • Bobarian LMD

      Take up painting, like Van Gogh.

      He knew what to do with an ear.

    • BakedPenguin

      Most people can develop pretty decent relative tone, but it does take a fair amount of work.

  2. Caput Lupinum

    Chords? You mean you can play more than one string at a time? – confused bass player

    • UnCivilServant

      There’s more than one string?

      • Hyperion

        In that case, 3 more.

      • robc

        About 12 minutes in, he pulls out a 5 strong bass.

      • blackjack

        I heard that 12 minutes is how long it takes a beginning bass player to get his first gig.

      • kinnath

        I love those two.

      • robc

        I saw them live about 2010 or so. Maybe a bit earlier. They are excellent.

      • Not Adahn

        For a Djent?

    • Chipwooder

      “Fuck yeah, you can” -Lemmy

      My son signed up for beginning band this year. He wanted to play guitar but, apparently, they don’t include guitar in the school band, so he chose bass instead. I need to go to the store to rent a bass before next week.

      • Caput Lupinum

        my daughter started learning the double bass last year. Her school has a string orchestra and she started on violin, but in her second year she switched to bass. Her reasoning was that since so many of the kids played coon if she wanted to play in the recitals she’d have to compete for a chair, but since no one else was playing the bass she’d be the only one, so they’d have to let her play in every performance. I had to respect the hustle.

      • Caput Lupinum

        Played coon? How did my phone correct violin to coon? Samsung must be racist against fiddle players.

      • Florida Man

        Is coon even racist anymore? I feel like it dropped out of use. When someone says coon I think raccoons and feel murderous because they get in the attic and bring flee infestations.

      • Caput Lupinum

        Maybe? I grew up around Scranton, that place is perpetually 40 years behind everyone else, so it is still racist there at least.

      • Not Adahn

        Anything once racist is always racist, and things that become racist countertemporarlly flow backwards through the timestream creating racists in the past. Thus, we needs to tear down the racist statues.

      • Florida Man

        Shut up, honky.

      • Chipwooder

        Electric bass guitar in his case, though

      • Gender Traitor

        They include that in the school band, but not guitar? Interesting.

  3. Hyperion

    Tablature if you want to cheat. In this case, cheating is good.

    • Plisade

      I use tab all the time. It’s frequently wrong, but at least someone else has enacted most of your labor 🙂

      • Hyperion

        I adopted tab a long time ago. It’s almost always close enough that you can make the adjustments yourself. Reading music is not for me. I learned it when I was a kid and then forgot it all since I don’t use it.

  4. Mojeaux

    I took piano lessons for 10 years. I was adequate. When I felt like it, I was really good, but I rarely felt like it. It is really awful to be good and talented at something you don’t like to do. I’d have rather had art lessons.

    Anyway, my teacher was big on theory and I never understood a word. Math R hard.

    • Plisade

      Music, math, physics, have all made sense to me. But chemistry… nope.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’ve forgotten more about math, physics, and chemistry than a lot of people will ever know.

        Still can’t make heads or tails of music theory.

      • Not Adahn

        Freshman music theory was at 8:00 in the morning. Sophomore at 9:00, Junior at 10:00. None when you were a senior. RHIP. Of course, most of your senior year was about setting up your recitals and getting jobs after graduation.

      • Mojeaux

        Moles are a bitch.

      • Mojeaux

        We have voles in the front yard. Every year. Break your ankle walking across it. We couldn’t get rid of them. Now I don’t care.

      • Hyperion

        Wrong. Moles are bitches. /pedant

      • Not Adahn

        Chemistry is completely intuitive. After all, you’re just a walking pile of chemistry.

      • UnCivilServant

        Rocket science was easy.

      • robc

        As a AE friend of mine used to say, “Rocket science is easy. Getting things to fly in air is hard.” He taught at the AFA.

      • UnCivilServant

        I mean getting it flying requires finding the coefficient of drag.

        Those transvestites don’t give up their information easily.

      • Gender Traitor

        Twenty dollars, same as downtown.

      • Not Adahn

        Ask any A.E. grad and they’ll assure you that you don’t need to be a rocket scientist to be a rocket scientist.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That has more to do with the strange world of musical notation that’s stuck in three centuries ago.

      • Hyperion

        Music and math are both one of those things that you probably don’t need any theory or formal training. Sure it helps some people, while others don’t need it.

        The folks who do some of this insane math stuff, like Einstein did, you know that was not learned from sitting in class. It’s like a gift.

        Same thing with music. No amount of theory of formal training will make you a prodigy.

        But math and music are two different things. Never saw Einstein write any great musical pieces or the best musicians figuring out relativity via math.

      • Caput Lupinum

        The problem with music theory is it is often presented and taught as prescriptive, when it’s greatest use is descriptive. You don’t need music theory to make good music, but music is very hard to accurately describe in the way that we can describe the visual arts without using music theory.

      • Not Adahn

        taught as prescriptive

        Yeah. I can STILL remember being docked points for a parallel fifth in one of my counterpoints.

      • Bobarian LMD

        I keep my fifth in the bottom drawer of the desk.

      • banginglc1

        Read this somewhere

        Three Notes Walk into a Bar

        A joke for the music theory nerds in all of us. Okay maybe not all of us…

        C, E-flat, and G go into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, but we don’t serve minors.”

        So the E-flat leaves, and the C and the G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished; the G is out flat.

        An F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough. A D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying, “Excuse me. I’ll just be a second.”

        An A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor.

        Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and exclaims, “Get out now! You’re the seventh minor I’ve found in this bar tonight.”

        The E-flat, not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next night in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says: “You’re looking sharp tonight, come on in! This could be a major development.” This proves to be the case, as the E-flat takes off the suit, and everything else, and stands there au naturel.

        Eventually, the C sobers up, and realizes in horror that he’s under a rest.

        The C is brought to trial, is found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an upscale correctional facility.

        On appeal, however, the C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless. The bartender decides he needs a rest – and closes the bar.

      • The Last American Hero

        Formal training absolutely can produce people with killer chops. There aren’t many concert pianists who just noodled around at home until they could reproduce amazing and complicated pieces of music.

        Most drummers don’t read music and don’t study technique – and can’t play a solo more complicated than Wipe Out.

        Will reading about theory make you a beast? No. That actually requires practice. Lots of practice. Focused on certain goals.

        Will ignoring formal training allow your creative side to flourish? Maybe if you are a once in a generation performer bursting with talent. For the rest of us mortals, Ignoring formal training means leaving a lot of tools out of your toolbox and being unable to decode complicated pieces because you don’t have the language.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        ?

    • Hyperion

      Just do woke math, they say it’s even better and it’s not racist. Just don’t engineer any bridges or cars, or planes, or… well, anything.

      • Mojeaux

        Luckily for me, I don’t have to do much math at all. Oh, well, I’ve been dragged back into algebra kicking and screaming since XY is sharing my office and he has algebra I this year. First day: “How do you do this problem?”

        Oy.

      • Hyperion

        I’m good at algebra. I was one of those nerds who loved the questions written like ‘there’s a train heading for Chicago from Atlanta and the wind is blowing 10 mph from the NE, and …’

        But real math, like all the really difficult written equations? No freaking way, that stuff is not for me, it’s like an alien language.

      • Mojeaux

        I took ALL the maths. Not really, just algebra, trig, geometry, chemistry, physics, calculus, and discrete math [adding 1s and 0s].

        Discrete math was the only one that totally fried my brain. The others, I just had to work very, very hard at.

      • UnCivilServant

        I tripped on differential equations because of non-academic related issues at the time.

        It all clicked decades later trying to land on the Mun in Kerbal Space Program (Constantly changing mass requiring constantly changing thrust to maintain a constant decelleration to land safely)

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I quit when I hit grad school level diffy q’s.

        The text was translated from Russian and had a completely different symbology set and the prof was a full-tilt Aspie that couldn’t communicate with semi-normal humans.

      • Gender Traitor

        I took the bare minimum of math classes in high school and as an undergrad – Algebra I & Geometry in HS, and a summer-term Stats class at the local community college to transfer to my uni.

        About twenty years later, I sign up for some grad-level business classes, including Business Math. Go to pick up the textbook, and it has “the C word” on the cover. After I changed pants, I discovered the book had an algebra review at the beginning. I plowed through that review before the first class session. Aced the class, but I’m sure I couldn’t do any of it now.

      • UnCivilServant

        Calculus? It was easier to understand when I took Physics, because there was something concrete to apply it do.

      • Gender Traitor

        This Calculus text may have applied concepts to business situations. The follow-up Probability & Stats class definitely did.

      • UnCivilServant

        …?

        How does that even work? Calculus was invented to describe physics.

        Statistics, yeah that can be applied to business easy.

      • Gender Traitor

        I’ll take a look at the Calc text to see if it did. I kept it and occasionally do algebra problems from it to keep my brain in shape.

      • Mojeaux

        I had physics before I had calculus.

      • UnCivilServant

        They have derived a way to teach the basics of physics without calculus, and it works for anyone who doesn’t really need to use either in the long term.

      • kinnath

        I used to tell my kids “Life is a word problem.”

      • Florida Man

        If Johny has two apples and you have no apples, Johny is a:

        A: wrecker

        B: kulack

        C: hoarder

        D: all above and should be put against the wall.

      • UnCivilServant

        Would you like a helicopter ride? It’s free.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        E: Gun owner

      • Hyperion

        All citizens have one apple and the government has tree apples == right answer.

      • Tulip

        I loved real analysis. Abstract function!

      • robc

        That was referred to as Real Anal by my math major friends.

      • Plisade

        Engineering slogan, “Intentions Don’t Matter”.

      • Hyperion
      • BakedPenguin

        I thought that was going to be this.

      • robc

        dammit BP!

      • BakedPenguin

        Ooh, and I only beat you by seconds…

    • Drake

      Probably good that I despise black licorice.

      • Hyperion

        OK, you anise hater!

      • Bobarian LMD

        ME NO HATER, STEVE LOVE ANIS.

        AND BY LOVE…

      • Mojeaux

        #metoo

      • Fatty Bolger

        Same here. Nasty stuff. Wife likes it though, so I’ll warn her. I can’t believe I’ve never heard of this before.

      • Florida Man

        You have to eat a significant amount and it has to be real licorice. Also, you shouldn’t be eating that much candy anyways.

      • Tundra

        The dude keeled over in a fast food joint.

        It wasn’t just the damn licorice.

      • Mojeaux

        So it apparently fucks around with your potassium levels, which are part of the electrical system of your heart. I got severely dehydrated after a stomach surgery (couldn’t drink any water without it coming back up) and landed in the hospital getting massive amounts of potassium pumped into me.*

        Obesity and/or overeating fast food isn’t going to tank your potassium like that.

        *By morning, my potassium hadn’t risen high enough so they shoved an IV in my arm with pure potassium. I would rather give birth again than feel that flame shooting into my blood vessels.

      • Mojeaux

        Oh and let me add. I would rather die of hunger than die of thirst. That shit’s agony.

      • Fatty Bolger

        Two ounces a day doesn’t sound like much.

      • Sean

        I used to be a fan of Panda licorice. Licorice allsorts too.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Glycyrrhizic acid? That sounds like something Animal might have made up for his Ten Minutes story.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It dissolves cirrhosis

      • Bobarian LMD

        What would I do with no liver?

      • Fourscore

        I was advised not to eat licorice (anise flavor) because the ol’ ticker doesn’t need the excitement. I take a daily beta blocker ’cause I ain’t got no natural rhythm.

        I love licorice, the stronger the flavor, the better. I sneak a little on the side but since no one cares its probably not sneaking.

  5. mikey

    Saw that last night. I had a severe Good ‘n Plenty habit about the time my heart went all afib. No one knew why – I was otherwise healthy. Damn near killed me. I wonder.

    • Hyperion

      You weren’t washing those down with vodka, were you?

      • mikey

        No. Beer which I still miss terribley

      • Fatty Bolger

        Belgian beer?

        Even some beers, like Belgian beers, have this compound in it,

    • kbolino

      I love me some Good ‘n Plenty but I always assumed it had not actual liquorice in it. Apparently, it does.

  6. Tundra

    Thanks, Plisade. You do a great job of explaining!

    As a High-Functioning Hockey Player* (HFHP), I’m going to need to read this a few times. 😉

    *h/t Jarflax

    • Plisade

      My pleasure 🙂

  7. Sean

    https://www.justice.gov/usao-mdpa/pr/statement-us-attorney-freed-inquiry-reports-potential-issues-mail-ballots

    Statement Of U.S. Attorney Freed On Inquiry Into Reports Of Potential Issues With Mail-In Ballots

    HARRISBURG – On Monday, September 21, 2020, at the request of Luzerne County District Attorney Stefanie Salavantis, the Office of the United States Attorney along with the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Scranton Resident Office, began an inquiry into reports of potential issues with a small number of mail-in ballots at the Luzerne County Board of Elections.

    Since Monday, FBI personnel working together with the Pennsylvania State Police have conducted numerous interviews and recovered and reviewed certain physical evidence. Election officials in Luzerne County have been cooperative. At this point we can confirm that a small number of military ballots were discarded. Investigators have recovered nine ballots at this time. Some of those ballots can be attributed to specific voters and some cannot. All nine ballots were cast for presidential candidate Donald Trump.

    Our inquiry remains ongoing and we expect later today to share our up to date findings with officials in Luzerne County. It is the vital duty of government to ensure that every properly cast vote is counted.

    Emphasis added.

    • Not Adahn

      Voting for a racist is hate speech.

    • Caput Lupinum

      Luzerne County? Corrupt? The day must end in ‘y’.

    • Hyperion

      What a coincidence. Now they just need to find all 500,000 ballots cast by dead people, who will mysteriously have all been cast for Joe Biden. Also a coincidence.

  8. kinnath

    Some day this will be valuable.

    Right now, I am just trying to put my fingers in the right place at the right time.

    • Drake

      We doing phrasing?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Anyone watching the new season of Archer?

      • Drake

        Yes. It’s okay.

      • Bobarian LMD

        I’ve got the DVR recording them but have only watched the first one last night.

        Had its moments, but was a little uneven.

      • UnCivilServant

        *adjusts the angle of Bobarian’s TV*

        There, it should be level now.

      • Nephilium

        Yeah, they’ve got a new showrunner now. Adam Reed stepped away (but is still voicing Ray). Usually leads to a little bit of change until the new team gets their rhythm down.

  9. Mojeaux

    @robc, I’m sorry to hear about your father. My condolences.

  10. Ownbestenemy

    Thanks plisade. Passed this onto my son.

    • Plisade

      Sure thing 🙂

  11. Gustave Lytton

    Continuing from the dead thread on prosecuting crystal clear self defense

    WTF on September 24, 2020 at 11:49 am
    This shit will continue unless and until the right has had enough and embraces the left’s tactics of visiting violence upon the landlords, DAs, etc. that pull this shit. But they support the police, so it won’t happen.

    That’s how the Troubles started out. Unionists and the security services on essentially the same team and it didn’t last. It quickly became a three way conflict with messy not always well defined lines.

    • Florida Man

      Not advocating this:

      But if you know you’re going to be railroaded by the justice system, why would you peacefully surrender to the police?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        A question asked by a lot of people in the ghetto.

      • Florida Man

        That’s the real frustrating part of this. We had a chance for real reform which would have helped the poorest members of the society most and it gets pissed away by Marxist.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Nobody is interested in solving actual problems when there’s a system to be overthrown and replaced.

      • R C Dean

        – 1 George Floyd

      • Fatty Bolger

        Well, you don’t *know* that you’re going to get railroaded. But you damn sure know that resisting might get you killed.

      • Florida Man

        You know now in certain cities. I guess the smart play is to move. Orlando is a blue city, but so far they don’t seem to have gone full commie. Being a swing state seems to be a check on either side going too far.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I have a very sincere hatred of the breed of white collar criminals that use the legal system to steal from others (elder abuse and estate theft, deed theft, etc…)

        My view is that they know the legal system inside and out and I can’t win in a fair fight. So much so that I might be inclined to resort directly to more extreme methods of resolution.

    • EvilSheldon

      Some smart dude once said that any self-defense use of force is three problems. Problem #1 is surviving the immediate violence alive and uninjured. Problem #2 is surviving the trip through the meat grinder that is our justice system. Problem #3 is surviving the emotional and psychological aftermath.

      You have to be prepared to handle all three problems.

      None of this is to say what happened to Gardner is anything short of an atrocity. The district attorney and the politicians who hounded him to suicide are inhuman monsters, and there is literally nothing bad that could happen to them that I wouldn’t celebrate.

      • Tundra

        Thoughts on insurance?

      • Tundra

        Great link. Thanks!

      • Suthenboy

        A buddy of mine (state police) told me once “If you ever have to defend yourself and someone ends up playing checkers with Hitler you want it to be the other guy. You also want to have a trial. There is no statute of limitations on murder and you have no idea who the DA is going to be in 20 years. Some family member of the person killed 2 generations from now can dredge that up and have you prosecuted. You want an acquittal.”

        True and sound advice but scary as hell.

  12. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Note on pitch training.

    If you have kids who are musically inclined at all. Get them in music development classes early.

    By age 7, you either have perfect pitch or you don’t. After that age, it is impossible to develop that talent, so much so that they use it as a gauge for evaluating learning/nootropic drugs.

    • Not Adahn

      Not entirely true. There is some success at learning it in college. I didn’t but I can tell when an A440 is played.

      • Gender Traitor

        NA, what was your musical specialty?

      • Not Adahn

        I was going for a MFA in conducting, but that flamed out before my senior year.

  13. Fourscore

    I am totally without musical talent or curiosity. I enjoy some music, if I can sort out the lyrics or not. I dropped out first and never got around to tuning in. Thanks though, Plisade, now I know what I missed but I couldn’t have learned it anyway.

    • Plisade

      You’re welcome 🙂

  14. Ozymandias

    Plisade: Thank you for this. I played trumpet for about 10 years as a kid (5th grade through end of high school). I never got any of this because trumpets are (1) a straight treble clef instrument, and (2) pitched in B flat. I took one theory course in high school and I learned the circle of fifths, but none of it “came together” for me. I mean, I could read music and key signatures, but…. *shrugs*

    Random thoughts a la Derpy:
    At the age of 40 and I bought my first guitar. NOW I needed to learn the fret board on my own. I stumbled across a lot of theory stuff, but none of it was quite organized in a way that helped me get my head fully around it. After 6 years, I was certainly a lot further along in understanding I-IV-V if for no other reason than learning the blues. I finally stumbled onto the thing I had always wished I could play but could never have afforded when I was younger: piano. I’m 4+ years into it. NOW it’s starting to make some sense (and I still enjoy those little A-ha! moments when some piece of the musical puzzle clicks into place). The piano keyboard makes a lot of music theory much, much clearer because it’s so evident visually.

    When I was in China, I got intro’d to their traditional instrument (for women, usually) the guqin. There are 7 and 21 string variants, blah blah blah. What fascinated me was that the Chinese notation I saw was numerical (yeah, math… with Chinese… go figure), not alphabetic. And the “sound” we normally associate with Chinese music is because their string tunings tend to not include a 4th and 7th. That’s how we recreate “Chinese” sounding music – no 4th or 7th.

    Under the Trivium, the true medieval “classical” education, learning music was considered essential because music is “math in motion.” Look at how we break up music into measures, and keep time in fours (or 8s), unless your Brubeck and you’re trying to prove you can “Take Five.”

    No matter what you think about the theory, if you ever have a chance, I cannot recommend the book “This is Your Brain on Music: The Science of a Human Obsession” highly enough. It was written by a former session guitarist who became a sound engineer for some very, very famous musicians (Gladys Night, Joe Satriani, Blue Oyster Cult, etc.) And then he essentially pioneered the field of the neuroscience of music. That book changed my life – I got it as a birthday gift and it was the impetus for the guitar purchase mentioned above.

    • Plisade

      Awesome! I too just started the piano a few years ago and wish that’d been my first instrument. From a theory perspective, piano’s much easier than guitar.

  15. Don escaped Duopoly

    This is well done.

    I think of the fretboard first and the theory later (not that I have any choice: that’s the order that I learned and feel and figure music). I wrote hereabouts once about how barre chords will tell you what the key is.

    So in Knocking above, the key is G to me because the root is a barre chord on the first string third fret with a minor key on the fifth (I, ii), and then majors on the second string third and fifth frets again (IV, V). Even if you can’t barre, you can just find each chord’s root note on the first (E) and second (A) strings and voila: there’s your key.

    I don’t solo based on the math, but at least with my method I can cipher enough to follow a solid theorist’s comments. I don’t know how I know what is right, what is dissonant, what is cool , what builds tension or what resolves it, but I know: too much time jacking around figuring out tunes for years to where I just know (pentatonic stuff, mind you: major tunes like Happy Birthday to You throws me for a loop).

    But I’m genuinely impressed by folk who know theory and can explain it.

    • Plisade

      Thanks! The barre chord approach to fretboard nav will definitely be in the next installment.