Weird Wednesday Midday Open Post

by | Oct 28, 2020 | Open Post | 266 comments

Some of you may actually have, oh, I dunno, jobs and such and can’t take the time necessary to delve into today’s special H&H Halloween feature until after work hours. Or in bed under the covers tonight with a flashlight. (I said, FLASHlight.)

This post is for anyone who wants to indulge in some general snark in the meantime.

NO SPOILERS from H&H, please. Yes, I’m asking politely, but I will get mean if I need to. Just remember, SP stands for Supreme Punisher.

Enjoy your afternoon!

 

About The Author

SP

SP

I've got an idea! How about we just stick to the Constitution as written and then the government can leave me the fuck alone.

266 Comments

    • Hyperion

      Did the dems lose control of their riot wing, or are they so convinced that Biden has it wrapped up that they let them loose again?

      • Caput Lupinum

        Yes.

      • R C Dean

        I don’t think they control BLM/antifa/black bloc. I think they are afraid to move against them, but I don’t think they issue orders on when and where to riot.

    • Agent Cooper

      Who takes the single shoes off the wall? Do they hunt for the matching one somewhere in the back?

  1. PieInTheSky

    Choose your own adventure? Basically what I expected really.

      • PieInTheSky

        what spoilers?

    • EvilSheldon

      Which is less embarrassing, on this crowd? Admitting that I sometimes look at furry porn, or admitting that I really like CYOA and text adventure games?

      • DEG

        I’m biased because I enjoyed the CYOA books and Infocom games. While I enjoy porn, I stay away from certain genres like furries.

      • Rhywun

        I enjoyed the CYOA books and Infocom games

        #metoo

        Easy answer.

      • EvilSheldon

        Prudes.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Furries are wierdos!

        Bronies is where it’s at!

      • juris imprudent

        Dude, just up and admit that you’re Brochettaward why doncha?

      • EvilSheldon

        Hey now. Let’s not get personal.

      • Ted S.

        Only sometimes?

      • Hyperion

        “I really like CYOA and text adventure games?”

        Why don’t you luddites at least try to be respectable and play on a piece of cardboard with little figurines and dice?

  2. UnCivilServant

    Now I have to come up with something to snark about.

    I have too many teleconference options.

    “Is this meeting on webex, zoom, or teams?”

    • SP

      Is your middle name Jeffrey?

      • UnCivilServant

        No.

        It’s just I have to keep track of what fiddly nonsense each option has.

      • UnCivilServant

        And pray it’s not Teams… goodness that’s awful software.

      • hayeksplosives

        You said it, Brother! I miss WebEx already.

        Teams blows.

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        Great. They just installed Teams where I work. What do I have to look forward to?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Now that they require TFA, I have stopped using TEAMS and will not be logging in.

        If it is important enough for me to be on Teams, my work can pay for a cell phone for me to authenticate with.

    • Agent Cooper

      You should suggest that someone (not you) streamline the process by making a fucking choice.

  3. EvilSheldon

    When I heard that we were getting something amazing, I wasn’t expecting SugarFree. Serves me right.

    • PieInTheSky

      I was 🙂

    • SugarFree

      SP and I kept it from the founders as well. OMWC didn’t even know what he was hyping.

      • PieInTheSky

        How? If I knew how did they not?

      • SugarFree

        Maybe you’re just smarter and drunker than they are.

      • PieInTheSky

        Just as a tip: when the dashboard was mostly disabled, the media gallery was not and the picture at the top of the choose your own adventure was right there

      • SP

        Yes, I had (have) limited time.

      • Rhywun

        D’oh

      • SP

        Which, truthfully, wouldn’t be that hard. Well, being drunker than the Founders might be.

      • EvilSheldon

        The Green Dragon Inn was a pretty rowdy place, by all accounts.

      • Count Potato

        Well, I’ll wait until tonight. Right now, I’m completely sober, and have a headache. I think this combination of dark weather and that this covid thing still isn’t over is wearing me down. I also think I’m not alone in that.

      • SugarFree

        Vitamin D. Seriously. It’s helped me a lot and wards off the COVID.

      • SP

        Man, if this is happy and healthy SugarFree, I don’t want to meet unhealthy and unhappy SugarFree!

      • Count Potato

        I take a multivitamin that has 50 mcg of D3. Or is even more better?

        I’m not vegan or anything. I meat tuna, eggs, cheese, etc.

      • banginglc1

        I meat

        I assume that wasn’t a typo.

      • PieInTheSky

        Also get some K2 once in a while.

        For old sick people in france a one time 80000 IU dose in the monthe they contracted covid made a huge difference.

        A one time dose of 50k at the start of winter may be a good boost and should not do harm, just don;t take any more for a week or so and than go to a maintenance dose of 2k to 5k

      • Mad Scientist

        Taking medical advice from SugarFree is like taking music suggestions from Ted S. It will only make things worse!

    • SP

      It’s why I just said “later in the week” instead of Wednesday. 😉

  4. Count Potato

    “After Jared Kushner said that New Yorkers deserve to suffer extensive deaths and sickness of coronavirus because the governor did not beg Trump sufficiently for help, it is laughable that he wants to sue for having his words plastered across Times Square.”

    https://twitter.com/BarbraStreisand/status/1321225858376441857

    “Yeah it’s like he’s drawing extra attention to it by trying to sue to keep it quiet. There should be a name for this.”

    https://twitter.com/neontaster/status/1321281088732487682

    LOLOLOL

    And what is the dumbass Lincoln Project doing putting up anti-Trump billboards in Times Square? It’s not like NY is a swing state.

    • UnCivilServant

      They’re not trying to swing the election, thry’re grifting, and they go where the anti-trump money is.

      • Count Potato

        “They’re not trying to swing the election, thry’re grifting”

        Then they are doing a great job.

      • R C Dean

        That’s the key.

        All election advertising is a grift. The consultants and operatives skim off the advertising budgets, often in the form of outright kickbacks from ad agencies (who also skim,via “commissions” that can be 20% or, likely, more). The avalanche of political advertising is known to be pretty ineffective, but everyone spends millions on it because their consultants and operatives tell them to. The same people who are skimming off what they recommend.

        And, of course, don’t doubt for one instant that the media outlets pocketing what’s left of the ad money don’t know which candidates are spending the most on them, and you would have to be naive indeed to think that doesn’t affect coverage.

    • Hyperion

      Well, there’s a rumor that he’s one of (((them))). You know (((them))) who are causing the vid to start with and are making it worse? Cuomo needs to take care of (((them))).

      You know who else…

      • Rhywun

        he’s one of (((them)))

        Despite that evidence, I still don’t believe Kushner said that and I’m not going to Vanity Fucking Fair to evaluate their sources-say “evidence”.

      • Hyperion

        Like I always say, if the lefty media tells me the sky is blue, I have to go outside to make sure it still is.

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s overcast today, the sky is gray.

      • Raven Nation

        Are all the leaves brown?

      • leon

        Would you really be safe and warm if you were in LA? Song is a bit dated now.

      • juris imprudent

        If I didn’t tell her, I could leave today.

      • UnCivilServant

        Are all the leaves brown?

        No, they’re very colorful.

      • WTF

        Oh, let me guess, “anonymous source familiar with Kushner’s thinking”!

  5. juris imprudent

    This is, interesting.

  6. DEG

    I look forward to H&H tonight.

    Thanks SP for the work on the site.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    Weird Wednesday, indeed.

  8. Tundra

    Ok, no spoilers, but is it acceptable to say that I laughed so hard I think I broke a rib? And that was only my first adventure.

    Holy shit, you people are amazing.

    • banginglc1

      By laugh do you mean cry and cower in a corner wishing you were dead?

      I haven’t read it yet, I’m just assuming.

      • SugarFree

        I tried to put in a little bit of something for everyone.

      • Tundra

        And you did.

        No, it was legit, no-shit, gut-busting laughter.

        Which I sorely needed.

        Thanks, SF!

      • SugarFree

        You are very welcome.

    • R C Dean

      Sadly, the NSFW will require me to wait.

      • SugarFree

        It is only naughty words and gore, no pics, if that helps.

      • juris imprudent

        Not working in the office means nothing is really NSFW these days.

        If you were in the office though, suppressing the laughter would be really tough.

    • Trials and Trippelations

      Great adventure had by all

  9. DEG

    Since this is an open post, I’ll dump my “too local news from NH” links here. First one:

    How could this have happened? Plymouth has a mask ordinance!

    Town officials in Plymouth have seen a rise in cases with their residents and students both at Plymouth State and the high school. On Tuesday, they sent a message that prevention must be a priority.

    Town officials are dealing with 12 cases of COVID-19, an increase from what they have been seeing. The high school had to be shut down Monday after a student tested positive and four restaurants are also now closed.

    • Rhywun

      OMG TWELVE CASES OF MURDERDEATHPLAGUE

    • invisible finger

      I have a St. Christopher pendant. And a St. Anthony (Fauci) mask.

      The pendant is more effective.

  10. DEG

    Hockey community unhappy with the Clown Prince’s edicts… err… guidance

    Youth hockey is preparing to get back on the ice in New Hampshire on Friday, but not without a lot of questions and frustration over the governor’s mandate that every player get a COVID-19 test.

    Hockey parents, coaches and staff members said they believe their sport is being targeted by the state mandate for blanket testing, and some questioned the effectiveness of a single negative COVID-19 test days or weeks before the players even get back on the ice.

    • The Other Kevin

      Illinois still regards hockey as “high risk”, so no games until at least next year. We’re not even supposed to scrimmage.

      • Tundra

        *rage*

  11. DEG

    Nashua, NH Trump County sign removed

    After he spent $2,600 on a billboard that reads “Trump Country,” Dave Streit said Outfront Media prematurely removed the highly visible message in downtown Nashua because of complaints.

    “We are political refugees. We watched what liberals did to Connecticut, so we moved here to New Hampshire where you live free or die, and no sooner than we get here we are getting canceled,” Streit said. “It is disgusting.”

    Streit hired Outfront Media to help design his large Trump Country sign and paid $2,600 to have it placed on top of 169 Main St. in downtown Nashua from Oct. 6 to Nov. 3.

    But the company notified him Monday that the message would be removed in the next couple of business days because of complaints. By Tuesday morning, the sign had been taken down.

    • DEG

      “Trump Country”… not “Trump County”.

    • Rhywun

      But it’s perfectly acceptable for various leftist regimes to spend taxpayer dollars in public space declaring their allegiance to a racist and Marxist political organization. ?‍♂️

      • leon

        What!? You think Black Lives is a matter of Politics!!! RACIST!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!1

    • mikey

      Nashua has been part of Massholeistan for some time.

  12. DEG

    Fired cop says he might be prejudiced but he is not racist

    Despite admitting to making derogatory comments about African Americans, fired Manchester police officer Aaron Brown insisted to internal affairs investigators he is not a racist, according to almost 600 pages of personnel documents released by the city.

  13. Rebel Scum

    This is highly irregular.

    • The Other Kevin

      Maybe try Ex Lax!
      /80’s sitcom

  14. DEG

    Amy Klobuchar visits Dover, NH

    U.S. Sen. Amy Klobuchar, D-Minnesota, said on Tuesday that her message to moderate Republicans is “our country is bigger than this.”

    Klobuchar said that is why Republicans such as Cindy McCain, former Ohio governor John Kasich and former Secretary of State Colin Powell have put aside political party to endorse Joe Biden as president as they look for someone to lead the country through the COVID-19 pandemic.

    “They’ve actually decided, ‘You know what? I don’t want this anymore. I want something better,’” Klobuchar said. “Our country has this major challenge in front of us. It’s really, really hard, but we want to put someone in place that is telling us the truth.”

    • WTF

      That Joe Biden has been in Washington for nearly half a century and hasn’t done shit other than sponsor the 1986 anti-drug legislation and the 1994 “super predator” legislation, while being wrong on every foreign policy issue, doesn’t seem to phase these idiots.

      • WTF

        “faze” – in before pedants

      • Rhywun

        Nikki?

      • Lord Humungus

        Phasers set to kill.

    • EvilSheldon

      “It’s really, really hard, but we want to put someone in place that is telling us the truth.”

      And so you want us to elect Kamela Harris. Do you even listen to your own bullshit?

    • R C Dean

      I want something better

      Who doesn’t? But that doesn’t explain why they are endorsing Harris/Biden.

      • WTF

        I want something better

        So, you’re going to vote for something demonstrably worse?

      • Rhywun

        Well, I guess “more graft” == “something better”.

    • pistoffnick

      Amy is…..special

  15. leon

    SF, I ran two adventures and cant wait to do more. Well done indeed.

  16. DEG

    Another Democrat candidate for office stealing signs

    Did you hear the one about the Democrat NH House candidate from Hollis? Democrat Tom Harris got caught red-handed, taking someone else’s signs. His excuse? He told the Hollis police he goes out after elections and removes signs.

  17. DEG

    Last one for this round. Grants offered to Concord, NH restaurants

    Grants are available to help Concord restaurants pay for dividers or other material to help customers feel safer as outdoor dining ends.

    The City of Concord and the Greater Concord Chamber of Commerce say grants of up to $1,500 will be awarded to restaurants to purchase materials.

    I have a better idea. Let’s get rid of the Clown Prince’s guidance.. err… edicts.

    • SP

      $1500 doesn’t buy much.

      • UnCivilServant

        Scotch tape, chop sticks, and saran wrap.

      • SP

        Just as effective as masks!

      • EvilSheldon

        It doesn’t buy anything. $1500 would cover a typical mid-range family joint’s operating costs for maybe two or three days, assuming that nothing major breaks. That also doesn’t cover building or equipment leases or payroll.

  18. Rhywun

    Some of you may actually have, oh, I dunno, jobs and such and can’t take the time necessary to delve into today’s special H&H Halloween feature until after work hours.

    True, but my work’s network is gaffled in some way that I couldn’t explain here so I’m unable to actually do any work. I already watched one of my last remaining overdue training videos (“don’t harass people”); I may watch the last one (“code of conduct” – 1.5 hours of fun) later.

    • leon

      I’ve been stuck in a 30 min virtual “standup” so i had time for two adventures.

  19. Rebel Scum

    Foreign election interference.

    Busy following the campaign in Arizona, spectacular backdrop and big energy.

  20. CPRM

    My apologies, I think I’m actually the one that put this convoluted scheme in motion. Pull The Strings!

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Assume a can opener the conclusion

    Biden’s pledge to rededicate the U.S. to combating climate change would mean a greater role for NASA’s Earth science research, an area that has been squeezed by Trump, according to space leaders who are advising or supporting Biden’s campaign, and outside analysts.

    “If they talk about the Green New Deal, that would rely heavily on NASA to be a part of getting that implemented using technology in orbit,” said retired Maj. Gen. Charles Bolden, who served as NASA administrator in the Obama administration.

    The space agency already uses satellites to study and understand the environmental changes that are causing more droughts, rising sea levels, more frequent deadly storms and natural disasters, while figuring out what human actions might reverse or minimize the damage.

    Climate change is all too terribly, destructively real, and people have caused it.. Our model says so.

    • leon

      Biden’s pledge to rededicate the U.S

      I read that as reeducate.

      • Rebel Scum

        #metoo

      • Gender Traitor

        S/B “eradicate”.

    • Rebel Scum

      environmental changes that are causing more

      No they aren’t.

      • Rhywun

        And the people know that. “Climate change” is at the bottom of every poll I’ve seen of voter concerns, even the biased ones.

    • Hyperion

      “a greater role for NASA’s Earth science research”

      Nothing says space like Earth Science. SCIENCE!

  22. The Late P Brooks

    His excuse? He told the Hollis police he goes out after elections and removes signs.

    This election is a foregone conclusion. Why wait?

  23. Toxteth O'Grady

    Nice beard, @jack.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    I read that as reeducate.

    It might turn out to be “eradicate”.

    • Gender Traitor

      Damn!

      • Ted S.

        You posted in the proper place, so you win.

  25. SugarFree

    A very special someone has solved the story maze. At the very end, there is a comment section only available to those persistent few…

    • UnCivilServant

      I thought that was an oversight.

    • leon

      Now i know what i’m doing after work.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    A very special someone has solved the story maze.

    Solved? Is there a “and they all lived happily ever after” option?

    I chose…

    poorly.

    • SugarFree

      The start over links take you to the section you made your last choice in, so you don’t have to so all the way back to the beginning.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    we want to put someone in place that is telling us the truth

    How can people say stuff like this and not just burst into flames?

    This reality sucks.

    • The Other Kevin

      Before being VP Biden was well known for plagiarizing his speeches. Apparently that’s been memory-holed.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        You didn’t build that! (truly)

  28. Hyperion

    Going to repost this from the dead thread. Articles are moving too fast for me today.

    Trigger warning, these people are insufferable cuntes who refuse to learn anything.

    Deplorables!

    I swear the media has one ‘explain all bout them rednecks’ article and they just pass it around and edit it depending on where this stuff was supposed to happen. I’ll take ‘shit you just made up’ for $600, Alex.

    TMITE

    • Rebel Scum

      Thanks for reading The Times.
      Create your free account or log in to continue reading.

      No…

      • juris imprudent

        It’s weird, I got that too, yet there are other links to NYT that just sail right thru. I guess they are selective in their pay-walling.

    • The Other Kevin

      I’m half expecting the next talking point to be that lying to pollsters is election interference.

    • leon

      “Rednecks in the Mist” has been a staple of East Coast media for a long time. It’s just taken up a fadish level in the last 4 years.

    • SugarFree

      Warty likes to call that article genre Rednecks in the Mist, brave journalism majors venturing into the savage wastelands to report on an un-understandable Other and recoiling in disgust.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Mad Libs: Hillbilly Edition.

      (PS. Hyp: I saw that the boob-kneed Land O’Lakes maiden was still on some packaging at Costco the other day. I forget what the product was; whipped cream maybe?)

    • SugarFree

      This is what everyone is trying to figure out: Is the Trumpmania here restricted to a fortissimo minority circling the drain, or is it a blinking red warning sign that the polls are, once again, badly discombobulated?

      “If I use all the fancy words from my Word-a-Day toilet paper, those bumblefucks will never understand I’m making fun of them!”

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I thought only sentient beings could be discombobulated.

    • Lord Humungus

      ZOMG they would faint with horror if they visited the towns near my folk’s now-gone house on Lake Michigan. No Starbucks! No chain grocery stores! The “yokels” have guns!

      • Hyperion

        “The “yokels” have guns!”

        And pickup trucks. And if they see someone just walking down the road, they roll their window down and punch them in the face.

    • PieInTheSky

      Articles are moving too fast for me today. – start drinking again?

      • Raven Nation

        you stopped?

      • PieInTheSky

        I didn’t but I remember Hyperion did.

      • Hyperion

        But I don’t want to be racist.

        Beer is racist

    • Cy

      The guy writes a story, in t is someone getting randomly punched in the face by someone and then driving away, purely or their political beliefs. he then goes on to ponder if maybe the polls are wrong?

      You can lead a horse to water….

  29. KOVIDKristen

    I definitely destroyed the country through my actions. In my defense, it’s been a while.

    • UnCivilServant

      What happened this time?

      • KOVIDKristen

        No spoilers!

    • EvilSheldon

      I completely agree. We all need more practice at destroying the country through our actions.

    • Agent Cooper

      Time to run. You’ll fit right in!

  30. Aloysious

    I can’t tell you how warm and squishy a choose your own adventure made me feel. Loved those things as a kid.

    Plus, it was my first exposure (that I remember) to a story told from the first person perspective.

    Loved it.

    • SugarFree

      Second person. (I don’t want an English major to yell at you.)

      But it took a bit of effort to write in both second person (you) and present tense (is not are.) Since I normally write in third person (he/she/they/it) and past tense, I had to go back and fix things when I lapsed.

      The COYA books are some of the few works produced in second person present tense, originally adopted to “put the reader in the story.” Most of the rest are one-off literary novels, and experimental literature.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Also Bright Lights Big City.

      • SugarFree

        Half-Asleep in Frog Pajamas by Tom Robbins is another prominent one.

      • The Hyperbole

        I carried a worn copy of If on a winter’s night a traveler around in college in order to impress the English major chicks.

      • Ted S.

        Michael Jackson’s Thriller

    • Nephilium

      Second person to get technical.

    • Aloysious

      *sighs wearily at self*

      Thanks for the correction. Second person, of course.

      This is me mixing things up in my head. Like usual.

    • PieInTheSky

      It’s very brave when celebrities fight against the restrictive social norms of the 1950s, with only a 7-decade time lag.

      If I was an optimist, I would say that maybe in 2090, celebrities will retroactively attack the woke tyranny and the left-wing establishment of the 2020s.

      (I’m not an optimist, of course. I’m with @edwest
      : The future belongs to the Left, and everyone will just keep moving further & further left. We’ve lost, and defeatism is the right attitude.
      The point now is to make sure the Left won’t enjoy its victory.

      https://twitter.com/K_Niemietz/status/1321443705035902976

      • UnCivilServant

        The future can’t belong to the left because you can only disconnect from reality for so long before everything collapses. Their ideas are not grounded in reality, and so will not hold up.

      • leon

        Meh, I’m about sick of the “Black Pill” attitude. “Boo fucking hoo, we lost and everything is the worstest ever.”

      • PieInTheSky

        well they are not wrong

      • UnCivilServant

        well they are not wrong

      • PieInTheSky

        oh UCS you incurable optimist

    • SugarFree

      I had a friend that tried to popularize a female masturbation euphemism: “Making soup.”

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Middle school Scruffy thought it was “minsturbating” when girls did it.

        Still trying to figure out who told me that.

      • KOVIDKristen

        Making Vichyssoise

      • PieInTheSky

        not clam chowder?

      • Surly Knott

        I thought it was the vagina monologues.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    An excess of enthusiasts

    Hundreds of President Donald Trump’s supporters were left in the freezing cold for hours after a rally at an airfield in Omaha, Nebraska, on Tuesday night, with some walking around 3 miles to waiting buses and others being taken away in ambulances.

    ——-

    Many of those at the rally at the Eppley Airfield faced hours in long lines to get in and clogged parking lots and busy crowds to get out, hours after Air Force One departed around 9 p.m. The police said the last person was loaded onto a bus at the rally site at 11:50 p.m. — about three hours after the event had ended.

    On Wednesday, Joe Biden said the incident was emblematic of “Trump’s whole approach.”

    “Just look what happened last night in Omaha, after the Trump rally ended, hundreds of people, including older Americans and children were stranded in sub-zero freezing temperatures for hours,” Biden told reporters during a brief speech in Wilmington, Delaware. “Several folks ended up in the hospital…It’s an image that captured President Trump’s whole approach in this crisis…he makes a lot of big pronouncements, but they don’t hold up.”

    Sounds like a weather-related logistical breakdown.

    Those people should have known better than to support President Cartoon Villain. They should be in their basements, sheltering in place with their masks on.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Joe couldn’t even not lie about the temperature…FTA: “The temperature in the area was in the mid-30s at the time, but as low as 27 degrees with wind chill.”

      Joe says “…hundreds of people, including older Americans and children were stranded in sub-zero freezing temperatures for hours…”

      Cannot believe people want to follow this doddering old fool.

      • UnCivilServant

        Spin : “Joe was clearly referring to European anti-anthropic degress, not deplorable american temperature metrics.”

      • Ownbestenemy

        Plus I guarantee the people there thought it was a nice night out in terms of temps. They aren’t idiots no matter what the NY Times write.

    • leon

      That is pretty stupid.

      But these are the same people who are saying waiting in a line is voter suppression.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    I had a friend that tried to popularize a female masturbation euphemism: “Making soup.”

    Something something self-basting delight.

  33. Rhywun

    Damn… work says they’re back up again. Well, I think I can squeeze in a quick nap.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    GLOBAL WARMING!!!!11!!

    That’s 8 or 10 miles from my “house”, at roughly the same elevation. There is a very real possibility I will be fixing some pipes when I get home.

    Keep beating that tin drum, warmista monkeys.

  35. grrizzly

    Germany is locking down.

    Germany’s federal and state governments decided Wednesday to impose a one-month partial lockdown to combat a surge in infections in the country that has been faring better than many of its European rivals in the current wave of the pandemic, Chancellor Angela Merkel said.

    The premiers of Germany’s 16 states, which are in charge of pandemic management, agreed to shut restaurants, bars, fitness studios, concert halls and theaters from Nov. 2 as part of a plan to stop infections from climbing. Hotels will only be allowed to host business travelers until the end of the month.

    The premiers also decided to limit gatherings in public to 10 people from two households.

    Ms. Merkel said the government would cover up to 75% of the lost sales of affected businesses with fewer than 50 employees. Bigger businesses will also receive aid within the constraints set by European Union state aid law, Ms. Merkel said. Total aid will be up to €10 billion ($11.75 billion).

    Macron is going to announce something similar at 3PM ET.

    • PieInTheSky

      Fuckit lock everything. Usually I have a tough time justifying to myself how much I drink but with the quarantine it is easy to find excuses.

      • Cy

        Yeah! I never liked my liver anyways!

    • Idle Hands

      I thought if we had just done what Germany did it would be all over? Were they lieing?

      • Gdragon

        I had someone tell me today with a straight face that what Italy did would have totally worked if only a vaccine had been created in the meantime. It’s not that the plan was always destined to fail, it’s that the vaccine was “late”. As you can imagine I just got away from that conversation very quickly and saved myself the potential trouble of an angry outburst (and whatever might follow). These fucking people…

      • PieInTheSky

        if only a vaccine had been created in the meantime – in under a year? no vaccine was fully developed until now in under 4-5 years

      • Gdragon

        Are you saying that you need to leave your house in the next 4-5 years? That sounds awfully selfish to him 😉

      • Idle Hands

        It’s religion.

    • DEG

      Fuck.

      I’m dreading an attempt to lock down again here.

      • leon

        :Puts on tin foil hat:

        They will do it on Nov 3rd as they are removing Trump from the whitehouse in cuffs, to disuade from the insurrections.

        :Hat falls off:

        What? Huh? what just happened?

      • Idle Hands

        We’ll see it’s all madness at this point.

    • Rhywun

      faring better than many of its European rivals

      Like it’s a fucking game of canasta or something.

      • juris imprudent

        The virus knows it can’t beat good government. /this is what they actually believe

    • The Other Kevin

      So if Europe didn’t listen to the experts, who did? I mean, besides the President Hillary Clinton that only exists in some people’s minds.

      • Idle Hands

        New Zealand, SE Asia and China.

      • PieInTheSky

        China is not really listening to experts. SE Asia who knows what data you can trust

      • juris imprudent

        lacist!

      • Idle Hands

        burn the witch!!!!!

      • Charlie Suet

        New Zealand is essentially waiting for a country with a pharmaceutical industry to come to its rescue, so far as I can see:

        https://www.health.govt.nz/our-work/diseases-and-conditions/covid-19-novel-coronavirus/covid-19-response-planning/covid-19-vaccine-strategy

        Even if you have no problem with the ideology, think their economy will be fine, and think that they can stave off Covid19 until the issue’s over it’s still ridiculous to pretend they’re an example for bigger countries to follow.

        Even if you think Blair in bloomers is doing a great job, New Zealand is still basically the equivalent of a kid who gets lost at the funfair and has the sense to stay put until the adults come and find them.

    • Raven Nation

      France: closing non-essential businesses but leaving schools open.

  36. PieInTheSky

    ‘For the past 8 months, people have gone through all sorts of pain.’

    @jamieeast
    disagrees with breaking the rules. He says no one knows better than the virus.

    He adds that it’s ‘madness’ that people want to break the rules ‘just for a roast dinner.’

    https://twitter.com/GMB/status/1321369372229861377

    strangely for some people Christmas is more than just a dinner.

    • leon

      These people are awful, terrible people. I guarantee you he has broken the rules and justified it for himself. Even if he was 100% compliant, the fact tht he values other peoples lives and happiness so little is a sign of how depraved he is.

      • EvilSheldon

        I get the impression (mostly through perusing Reddit) that a large proportion of hardcore leftists cannot get along with their families.

  37. PieInTheSky

    Who are the happiest couples, politics wise?

    By Satisfied w/ their Family Life:

    61% Both R
    55% Both D
    47% Mixed Marriages

    https://twitter.com/WilcoxNMP/status/1321267743023419393

    But I remember reading on D twitter the R women have no personality and do everything their husband tells them. So maybe it is fake happy

    • EvilSheldon

      Or maybe women really secretly (or not so secretly) like being told what to do?

      Or maybe Democrats are all miserable assholes for whom nothing is ever good enough?

      Or maybe polls are stupid?

      Or maybe I should bag this stupid video player script and start drinking?

    • Urthona

      I mean it’s not that much different.

    • SP

      I think the happiest marriages are when both partners are libertarians.

      And one of them has an ample supply of circular oxidized metal food packaging debris.

      • PieInTheSky

        and a wee bit of vino now and then

      • SP

        I guess I should have added…

        And the other has a large “wine cellar.”

      • juris imprudent

        Now my wife and I have been very happily married for 22 years and she has not once threatened me with a rusty tin can lid.

      • SP

        She clearly has you well and truly trained. Kudos to her!

      • leon

        It’s the Electro-shock therapy. Gets us men to forget about the tin can lids.

      • juris imprudent

        We both know the magic words “yes dear”.

      • Suthenboy

        SP nails it.

        Mrs. Suthenboy and I have been together for 25 years, married for 23.
        We have never had a single fight. Not once.
        We are both conservative leaning libertarians.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Been trying to explain to my boys the difference between arguement and fighting.

        My wife and I confront each others views and goals, but it isnt a confrontation that leads to a fight.

        We may argue points, but do not fight.

        I think it stems from know each of us have different upbringing, different views and some same views and that being a #mealso doesn’t advance our goals we have together.

      • Suthenboy

        I don’t think we have even had arguments. I would use the word debate.

        If you want flared tempers and fighting you can go out in the world and find someone to whip your ass in five minutes. In my view your home is your refuge from that sort of nonsense and your spouse is your partner, not an opponent, so we have none of it here.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Debate is a better word choice. I had to reeducate my kids that two opposing views are not a fight. I remind them they live in a nice house because of those opposing ideas that found the best common ground solution.

      • Hyperion

        That’s just because us good ol boys were taught before marriage that if she starts getting sassy, lock her in the root cellar for a week. That always works, no more fights!

    • Hyperion

      Well, with them deplorables, the man is happy, cause she cooks, is good in bed, cleans, and then votes the way he tells her. He also tells her to be happy, so it’s all good.

  38. Ownbestenemy

    If Trump does lose, does the Left demand his immediate exit claiming he is dangerous and we cannot wait until Jan?

    • Raven Nation

      I certainly don’t think Trump is going to try and stay in the WH after January if he loses.

      BUT, I do expect him to whine and complain and resist for two months if he loses in a close election.

    • leon

      Yes, you will hear people saying that.

    • UnCivilServant

      Even when he wins they will demand his removal retroactive to 2016.

    • Idle Hands

      Yes and I think they will do whatever they can to put him and his entire family in jail after he leaves.

      • Idle Hands

        There’s been an open black balling on everyone who decided to work in the administration in dc since 2016. Can’t have this happen again.

      • leon

        Biden has already said something along the lines that he would prosecute.

        Which, because it will be blatently politicial is pretty bad. But at the same time, there _are_ a lot of politicians who get off on a lot of crimes because prosecuting them would be seen as political.

        See for example: Joe Biden.

  39. PieInTheSky

    The return of Perfidious Albion

    https://unherd.com/thepost/the-return-of-perfidious-albion/

    This time the likes of Pakistan and Turkey — two countries with dreadful human rights records, in particular their treatment of religious minorities — have their sights set on France because the president rather objected to a French schoolteacher being beheaded in the street.

    Millions of Muslims placed in Chinese concentration camps = tumbleweed.

    French president makes some restrained criticism of Islam = “Muslims are being treated like Jews in the 1930s”; “You are in a real sense fascists”; mass boycott of French goods.

    Luckily France has the free world behind them, with strongly-worded support from Germany and backing from Italy, Greece and the Netherlands.

    And from Britain… crickets, so far.

    French diplomats are said to be concerned about British silence, but then Britain is currently negotiating a free trade deal with Turkey, as well as its post-Brexit deal with the EU.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I’m not a big Macron fan but I’ll take him any day over Erdogan and the bearded mullahs.

    • The Other Kevin

      There’s something about that last debate that sticks with me, and I haven’t seen anyone else mention it. Biden tried to come across as a hard ass when it came to foreign policy. He sounded a lot like George W Bush. Compared to Trump’s record of negotiating and simmering things down a bit, it came across as pretty jarring.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        If Biden wins the war with Russia and Iran in Syria is going to be glorious.

      • leon

        Yeah, the whole “HE DARES TO NEGOTIATE AND HAVE DIPLOMATIC RELATIONS WITH DICTATORS” is a strange tactic from the left. Or it would be strange except that the DNC opened its doors wide so that it could allow the Never Trump Neo Cons into the party.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Makes me think our State Deptartment has let all the other nations in that area they don’t care what Isreal does like in times past..plan accordingly.

      • juris imprudent

        Never Trump Neo Cons

        A gift that will keep on giving.

      • The Other Kevin

        To me it was just another instance of “Do the opposite of what Trump does” and it fell flat. That’s a big reason to not trust Biden or the Dems in general. For the past 4 years it’s just been opposition to Trump no matter what.

      • Suthenboy

        There is too much money to loot from American taxpayers for the establishment to ever end pointless wars.

        The GNP of Afghanistan is 7B annually.
        The USS Gerald Ford cost 77B.
        How does that make any sense?

      • PieInTheSky

        7 billion seems low. you sure?

      • Suthenboy

        Have you been to Afghanistan?

        Those are the numbers I am finding. I thought 7B was a bit high.

      • PieInTheSky

        I find 20is billion nominal, 70is PPP

      • Ownbestenemy

        Doesnt change his point though. We used to go to war for foriegn plunder now its to plunder our own treasury.

      • PieInTheSky

        Romania is a shithole but seems rich at 250 billion nominal / 500 PPP

      • PieInTheSky

        Doesnt change his point though. – true it just seemed shockingly low to me for some reason

      • Ownbestenemy

        What is PPP in american talk? GNP/GDP?

      • leon

        PPP = Purchasing Power Pairity.

        Just takes numbers like GDP/per capita etc and adjusts it for cost of living, so that you can get a better idea of what the wealth really is like.

        So for example IIRC Iceland has a GDP/household of something like 90k a year. But the PPP GDP per household is down to 70K a year.

      • Ownbestenemy

        When we invaded it was..
        Now they have 20bil and 19 of that is to fund our War on Drugs.

      • Suthenboy

        Yeah…everywhere I look I get different numbers. Never the less, my point stands.

      • Ted S.

        The USS Gerald Ford cost 77B.

        More like $14B.

        But some people like their just-so stories.

  40. leon

    BREAKING: Trump has ordered the suspension of the election in PA and sent in Troops to stop the rioters, citing concerns that riots would cause “Voter Suppression”.

    Ok he didn’t do that, but the fact that it is believable means you should vote against him / Pretty much every Lincoln Project Ad.

    • Suthenboy

      It’s believable?

    • The Other Kevin

      Look, even though Trump didn’t do any of the crazy things we said he’d do, doesn’t mean he won’t do it in his next term.

      • leon

        Yup. A large amount of arguments are: Look trump could do this bad thing, and you believe it because we’ve said how bad he is and all the bad things he ould do. So believe us that he is about to do those really scary things.

      • Suthenboy

        I think it was Suderman over at TOS that predicted gangs of Trump supporters would be roaming the streets attacking people and burning the country down.

        *looks at news from Philadelphia*

        That was the first time I used the term ‘Trump derangement syndrome’.
        We have heard incessant insane ravings of threatened establishment morons for nearly four years. I dont know why anyone would expect them to stop foaming at the mouth now.

      • Hyperion

        Did you see the jacket’s article lamenting how bad Biden will fuck up the country? But then he goes to the cocktail party and votes for Biden anyway, because bad orange man?

      • Suthenboy

        No. I dont give them any clicks at all anymore, but that is exactly what I expected.

        He is not alone in that stupidity.

      • Hyperion

        I followed it from a link, either here, or on another site.

      • Hyperion

        As opposed to the sure fact that a Biden admin will do everything bad imaginable and then more.

        I’m taking my chances on the Bad Orange One.

      • Raven Nation

        Yeah, I get tired of the “he’s the worst president ever.” I get it, Trump’s a blowhard, a dipshit, and tends to say whatever is in the front of his brain at any given moment.

        But, a short list of things he hasn’t done: driven tens of thousands of Americans off their land through the winter snows; invaded foreign countries; locked up thousands of Americans because of their ethnicity.

        Bad president, pretty much. Worst? Not even close.

      • Hyperion

        Best president of my lifetime. Reagan isn’t even a close 2nd.

      • juris imprudent

        We’re talking presidents, not low-value entertainers.

      • Suthenboy

        “he’s the worst president ever” stuff does get tiring. No one ever gives examples of why. I suspect the reason is that they are ashamed to give their reasons, namely that they believe that America is bad and having a president that prioritizes America’s interests is evil.

        In other words, they think America is full of deplorable, irredeemables and want them punished. Most of them are too cowardly to say that out loud.

      • juris imprudent

        So Trump actually understands that the Cold War is over, and all of the institutions that made sense in the CW are obsolete. All of the people completely invested in that cannot accept that. However, neither he nor they really know how to navigate what the world actually is. He has zero diplomatic skills to bring to his insight. That makes him a fairly bad president, at least on that count. He also is abysmal at selecting, and getting value out of, his subordinates – and at getting them to actually implement shit via the bureaucracy.

        He wastes time entertaining himself (and his followers) on twitter instead of focusing on what needs to be done.

      • Suthenboy

        *looks at all other presidents since 1900*

        So you are saying he is the best president in our lifetimes.

      • Suthenboy

        I guess I owe Silent Cal an apology for that remark.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      TLP’s ads show just low they think the IQ of the average voter is. It’s shameful really.

  41. juris imprudent

    The Bee crushes another one.

    “Well, this is convenient,” he said as he saw people were protesting the shooting of a man who was just one knife away from being unarmed. He grabbed his balaclava, a sign reading “INJUSTICE ANYWHERE IS A THREAT TO JUSTICE EVERYWHERE,” and a shopping cart, and headed out the door.

  42. UnCivilServant

    The conflict between lazy me and spiteful me is going to destroy me.

    My lazy side keeps going “lets skip the walk today, or take a shorter route.” my spiteful side responds with “sure’ we’ll do the route that’s 90% as long – but we’ll do it in 75% of the time, and then we’ll do the longest route yet in the same shorter time frame!” and proceeds to berate my lazy side with verbiage I don’t want to repeat here.

    I should stop talking to myself, people might think I’m crazy.

    • pistoffnick

      “…people might think I’m crazy.”

      We know, UCS, we know.