Seven Minutes of Volbeat

by | Nov 25, 2020 | Music | 257 comments

Rawk

Rock is dead. Nonetheless, in its day it was a mighty beast and its corpse shambles on, its nervous system shattered into microscopic sub-genres, it’s money-making/shaking bits decomposed into penniless streaming. In its prime, like Steve Smith, rock permeated everything everywhere, so even though it’s heart is stilled (sorry Huey), the extremities still twitch and sometimes send us jolts of something innovative or at least interesting.

Enter Volbeat, from Denmark. Led by Michael Paulsen, with Rob Caggiano of Anthrax adding some shred, they are one of the very few straight(ish) rock and roll bands producing new music and touring, typically attached to the larger metal tours because what else is there besides metal and lame-o nostalgia?

Mix basic blues rock, power-metal twin guitar and lyrics, Social Distortion, Elvis, boogie woogie, emo, shake randomly and strain through a European that loves Americana. Michael Poulssen’s singing is kind of cliched and range limited, but you can really feel his emotions through the lyrics; gangsters, gunslingers, mols and greasers. They do fun covers too!

I picked 5 songs and queued them to the more awesome parts to keep it snappy, but they don’t dawdle much and jump right to it, give each one minute? It’s not weighty, it’s fun and original, it’s rock and roll!

Leviathan (because Sea Smith rock)

Fallen (for his departed dad, who was a big fan of the band, good man)

Sorry Sack of Bones (for the boogie and for giving me the rock & roll zombie imagery)

Dead but Rising (moar metal!)


I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry (because Hank Williams)

About The Author

hoof_in_mouth

hoof_in_mouth

Software developer, pilot and instructor, old new Dad, loves trees, hates horses.

257 Comments

  1. Brochettaward

    You forget, you are responding to a miserable excuse for a human being.

    This is no way to talk to First of Firsters. I do this for you, the people.

    • Jarflax

      Wait:

      First of Firsters
      Fist of Etiquette

      Tinfoil rustles

      • Brochettaward

        Fist of Etiquette was a cheater. Like USC. I am the true First of Firsters.

      • juris imprudent

        It’s a pretty sad shtick, but when it’s all you got, I guess you stick with it.

      • Brochettaward

        You’re sad! I’m First!

  2. westernsloper

    I picked 5 songs and queued them to the more awesome parts to keep it snappy

    They all started at the beginning but I am down with those even though I didn’t listen through. Especially the last because Hank Williams.

    • rhywun

      Ditto but I liked the bits I listened to.

    • SP

      That’s on me. We had a heckuva time embedding these for some reason, and I didn’t notice it had stripped the start times. Sorry, Hoof!

  3. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Is your actual name Michael Paulson? You can be honest, I promise I won’t tell if it is.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Then again, it’s alright, I wouldn’t skip it if it came on one of those custom internet radio stations but I wouldn’t seek it out either. At least someone’s still making what passes for sort of hard rock.

    • hoof_in_mouth

      I wish. Then I could be >1% cool. And speak Danish.

  4. Sean

    I tried them. Not really feeling it.

    *shrug*

  5. Fourscore

    No old enough for real old guys. Couldn’t dance to any of them. You kids can enjoy the sounds but I need the real Hank.

  6. Urthona

    Hey what time is the kraken supposed to show up today? Asking for a friend.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      The great white whale grabbed it in its maw and dragged it down 20,000 leagues at the least from what I hear.
      Yarrr!

      Or maybe they just filed a bit late.

      • Sean

        It’s very hard to know what’s actually going on. Fake news abounds (on both sides) and major censorship (one sided) keeps the waters a bit murky, at best.

        That being said, Twitter is banning peeps more and more. They scared? I dunno, but I hope so.

      • blackjack

        It’s not just that fake news abounds, the major players in disseminating the news are all the bag for team blue. Hell, big tech is spying on us all and using what ever means at it’s disposal to get us to vote blue. The fact that Trump could do as well as they’re claiming is a miracle, and he did much better than that! All the info is tied together and it’s all in the hands of Bezos, Zuckerberg, Dorsey, Gates, et al. They are using it to try and get dems elected. As hard as they can. Everything they’ve ever accused Trump of, they are doing. It’s a sure thing.

  7. Fourscore

    Thanks SP, for your public service announcement. At least it was good news.

  8. The Hyperbole

    How many times has Rock and Roll died now? three four dozen? We still got Aussie Punks making this, Rock and Roll ain’t dead it isn’t even in a coma.

    • Rebel Scum

      Grunge died with Kurt Cobain.

      • Sean

        Scott Weiland…err…Chester Bennington…err…Chris Cornell…err..Layne Stayley disagrees.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That’s depressing, are there any prominent grunge lead singers left alive (and Bennington wouldn’t count even if he was alive)?

      • EvilSheldon

        Yes. Eddie Vedder is still alive. Don’t you feel better now?

      • Sean

        No. ?

      • The Hyperbole

        There are depressed fucks writing songs in drop D tuning in thousands of basements even as we speak. Grunge, like rock and roll or R&B or Funk or Jazz or real and fake country will never die, some kid somewhere just heard Limehouse blues and is already putting together a Gypsy Jazz band that will incorporate the drummers love of Prog Rock, it’s all going to live forever.

      • blackjack

        Last year, back we were still kind of American, I was riding my motorcycle and listening to this loudly. I got stuck at a really long light light and was waiting it out when someone from the truck next to me yelled out. I thought he was gonna say “Turn that shit down” or something. I turned it down to see and it was a kid about 17 y/o. He excitedly told me that this was his favorite song and thanks for playing it. It’s less than a “b” side. Rare as fuck. I’ve never heard it played on the radio, ever. I thanked him and told him he has great taste in music. Anyways the kids can surprise you.

      • limey

        Lovely stuff.

      • rhywun

        This. Nothing is dead. Every time I watch something on Bandcamp (or insert service of your choice) there are links to dozens of other bands doing something similar – or not, but just liked by the same people who liked what you were listening to. Wander long enough and it’s like the telephone game.

    • hoof_in_mouth

      As a cultural force or touchstone rawk is dead dead dead. No one cares, no one refers to it, there are no stars. Sure, there are a million bands out there playing it, but it moves nothing bigger than random peoples booties.

      • egould310

        Same thing happened in 1976. Then; Ramones.

      • hoof_in_mouth

        It’s weird how disco was so much bigger than punk, yet died quickly while punk is evergreen

      • blackjack

        It is absolutely not weird that disco died. Not even a little.

      • hoof_in_mouth

        There is new punk every 10 years, has there ever been a disco revival? That space got electronic or EDM or whatever the kids call it built over it

      • Mojeaux

        No one cares, no one refers to it, there are no stars.

        That’s what I envision when I hear “rock is dead.”

        I listen to plenty of rock, but I have to trip over it or be looking for it. XX is listening to 20-, 30-, 40-year-old rock and metal because she doesn’t like what she’s got to choose from. She does not like grunge.

        Pop, I think, is also dead and Autotune killed it. XY likes pop, but he listens to 80s pop.

        They both plunder my music collection to find their next loves.

      • Nephilium

        Where did my Liberty go?

        The Interrupters, who I’ve linked here multiple times.

      • rhywun

        Probably true, also about every genre I like – and I couldn’t care less.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Rock and roll may be dead, but it never forgets.

  9. Sean

    I’m not going to be happy until I see droves of people going to jail for election fraud.

    • Brochettaward

      That’ll never happen. Even if they somehow proved fraud in court and the election was overturned, you wouldn’t see anything besides token charges.

      • Rebel Scum

        token charges

        Dems are going to throw the diversity hires under the bus?

      • Brochettaward

        I mean, if I were a betting man, I’d say yes.

        But that isn’t going to happen.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      You’re going to need some Prozac then, even if Trump pulls this off which is getting less and less likely by the day unfortunately.

      • Sean

        Let’s change happy to satisfied.

      • Rebel Scum

        Either it will flop or we are seeing one of the most significant events in American history unfold before our eyes.

      • rhywun

        one of the most significant events in American history

        I think it’s that either way. Half of America thinks the election was shady as fuck and they know that the GOP is not competent enough to pull off some sort of act of “gaslighting” to make them think that way.

    • juris imprudent

      So, I looked into the Delaware County numbers. In both ’16 and ’20, Trump underperformed the down-ballot Republicans, including Toomey (in ’16, by 16K votes). It was looking like the Biden number might have been fishy by about 10K votes (over the statewide office votes on the ballot) until I found the Congressional result, where the total was within 1000 votes of the Presidential vote. Also, Trump’s numbers in ’20 were up over ’16, so he didn’t lose ground (even though he still underperformed the other Republicans in that county).

      • Brochettaward

        So what, in your view, made PA so exceptional compared to the various swing counties in Florida?

      • Drake

        They counted more votes than ballots received.

      • juris imprudent

        Not sure what you mean about PA being exceptional. Trump barely squeaked out a win in ’16, courtesy of one of the worst campaigns in history. He barely lost this time around.

        I looked specifically at Delaware because of Sean’s link about accusations of improprieties there. Is it still possible that there were? Yes. Does there need to be real evidence of that? Yes. Is that in yet? No. Could it come in at some point? Certainly. Am I going to parade around making accusations in the mean time? No.

        Does that cover it all?

      • Brochettaward

        Your main point is that Trump numbers went up, yet somehow record numbers of Dem voters overwhelmed that number. Why is this the case in blue wall states but not the typical swing states?

      • rhywun

        The GOP easily flipped my sort-of bellwether NY district that had gone blue in 2018. Obviously just anecdata but it makes me suspicious of Joe’s performance – of which I haven’t seen any numbers on a district basis yet. *shrugs*

      • juris imprudent

        PA is no blue wall. CA is a blue wall. FL isn’t really a swing state anymore.

      • Brochettaward

        What? Florida went to Trump by the same sort of margin as PA. The state gets an influx of people from the NE every day. But you don’t think it’s a swing state because Trump suddenly gained ground?

      • juris imprudent

        Florida right now is a Republican trifecta – Governor, State Senate, and House. And has been nearly without exception since 2000.

        Now the Congressional delegation is evenly split 14-13 to the Repubs, so they need to up their gerrymander game in next year’s district creation.

        If the Republican candidate is squeaking out victory in Florida, you might have to conclude that says more about the candidate then it does the state. Unless you’re a retard that thinks only about the Presidency.

      • Brochettaward

        We are talking about the presidency and it has been ridiculously close in every election outside this one. That’s what a swing state is. You are trying to redefine it to suit your argument when it has been in play for every Democrat since 2000. And Trump won it handily.

      • rhywun

        That’s the stuff ?

      • Sean

        I’ve seen it. I’ve seen it disputed.

        I don’t know what to believe in my gin-soaked reality.

      • The Hyperbole

        You’re saying there are 700,000 or more fake ballots, PA had a total of ~7 million ballots, so approximately 1 out of 10 ballots is fake. start calling the ‘voters’ , you’ve had three weeks, It should be easy to shown that one out of every ten votes cast was cast by a voter that denies voting. Maybe that’s the “Kraken”, if they pull that off I’ll recant all my skepticism, and admit that you guys were right. hell if they get half of that let say 5% of some random sample of logged in voters to say they didn’t vote I’ll accept that the election was stolen.

      • blackjack

        After Russiagate, impeachment, attempted reimpeachment, and everything else the dems have done to Trump, Thinking that the cheatingest true blue stronghold states would fudge the hell out the presidential election is the smart move. Occam points to massive fraud. There’s no getting around it.

      • Urthona

        Everyone is disputing those numbers.

  10. Rebel Scum

    Having listened to Volbeat before, I like the music but I hate the singer’s voice.

  11. Sean

    You’re all going to be grandma killers. Put your fucking masks on!

  12. kinnath

    Unimpressed with any of the 5 tunes offered.

    I don’t think I’ve heard anything produced in the last decade that I actually enjoy listening too.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      except for my own music, I agree, nothing new or fresh….

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Wait, what about…come to think of it that was 1998. Nevermind.

      • The Hyperbole

        You dudes ain’t even trying, there are new bands playing all kinds of great music across all genres, I get the “get off of my lawn” schtick but if you actually enjoy music it’s out there. Get a satellite radio, listen to a different station every day, explore, enjoy.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Part of what makes music good is its novelty and good metal or country or whatever has been done before and I’ve heard it. It’s not that what’s being put out nowadays isn’t good in a vacuum, it’s just not particularly good to me even when it maybe is good. Wait until you get older, you’ll understand.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        TLDR, I’m just jaded I guess.

      • rhywun

        I get it. Personally, I don’t need “novelty” that much, though I can appreciate it. I’m just as happy with the various “revivals” that keep rolling around.

        Really, I just want a good tune.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’ve been chasing the dragon ever since I listened to that cassette of Led Zeppelin IV in 1983 while I was drinking behind the local Burger King with my buddies and the well’s run dry. Even the new stuff has been done before as has this observation.

      • kinnath

        I am open to suggestions.

        This is a great place and a great time to make those suggestions.

      • The Hyperbole

        What do you dig? I can’t guarantee anything but I’d bet I can suggest something in your wheelhouse.

      • kinnath

        I have 250+ CDs ripped to my computer. Looking at the artists (not all of them) in alphabetical order:

        Aerosmith, Alanis Morrisette, Alice in Chains, Allman Brothers, Ambrosia, America, Arc Angels, Aretha Franklin, Asia, Atlanta Rythym Section, Audioslave, BB King, Bad Company, Beach Boys, Beatles, Billy Squire, Blood Sweat & Tears, Blue Oyster Cult, Buffalo Springfield, Bush, Chevelle, Chicago, The Cranberries, Creed, CCR, David Bowie, David Essex, Dishwalla, Doobie Brothers, Eagles, Eddie Money, ELO, Elton John, Emerson Lake and Palmer, Eric Johnson, Evanescence, Everlast, Fabulous Thunderbirds, Filter, Fiona Apple, Foreigner, Fuel, Garbage, Gary Moore, Gary Wright, George Benson, Georgia Satellites, Gypsy Kings (that’s right), Gods Child, Golden Earing, Gordon Lightfoot, Green Day, Guess Who, Ian More, Incubus, Jake Shimabukuro, Janis Ian, Jeff Healey, Jet, Jewel, Jim Croce, Joan Baez, Joe Cocker, Kenny Wayne Shepard, Kid Rock, Led Zepplin, Linkin Park, Live, Lyle Lovett, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Mashall Tucker, Metallica, Monster Magnet, Moody Blues, Natalie Merchant, No Doubt, Oasis, Offspring, Oleander, A Perfect Circle, Peter Frampton, Poe, Police, Prince, Queen, REM, Rainbow, Rob Zombie, Robert Cray, Roberta Flack, Rolling Stones, Seether, Shinedown, Silvertide, Smithereens, Squeeze, Stabbing Westward, Stained, Steely Dan, Stereomud, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Stone Roses, Styx, Theory of a Deadman, Tonic, Tori Amos, U2

      • rhywun

        Spooky. I know most of those and very few of them are objectionable to me.

        Linkin Park

        Never mind.

      • kinnath

        Linkin Park

        What can I say. I am hopelessly in love with schlock.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        No The Kinks? Unless you already know you don’t like them maybe check them out. Also ZZTop.

      • kinnath

        Kinks and ZZ Top are not “new”.

        I have ZZ Top on cassette someplace.

        No idea why I don’t have Kinks in my collectoin.

      • The Hyperbole

        Okay, for Blues check out the North Mississippi All-Stars (Shake Hands with Shorty, is my favorite) -For rock and roll The Woggles (Rock and Roll Backlash) and the Hellacopters (Rock and roll is dead) and just in general Tom Waits and Van Morrison and John Lee Hooker, how do you not have them on your list!.

      • Sensei

        rhywun Exactly. I enjoy of all kinds and kinds of artists.

        Except Bruce Springsteen.

      • kinnath

        Tom Waits and Van Morrison and John Lee Hooker, how do you not have them on your list!.

        I didn’t list every artist that I have ripped to my computer, and I don’t have all my CDs ripped to my computer.

        And I have cassettes and vinyl from decades ago.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Regina Spektor, Ingrid Michaelson, The Naked and Famous, Michael Franti, primitive radio gods, candlebox, ymo.

        AOR seems to actually be dead with singles or really single songs the primary unit of music these days. Try YouTube from your current likes and see what the algorithm comes up for you.

        https://youtu.be/CsxaoXHe9Xc

        https://youtu.be/hAFuD-S-e_E

      • egould310

        @Gustave Michael Franti “anything” yes.

      • commodious spittoon

        Regina Spektor, <<3 she's a lovely one

        who'd you even dig out of a hole who remembers her

      • kinnath

        Youtube has cost me hours and hours of my life with suggested new tunes.

        I am particularly fond of the live blues acts that show up.

      • egould310

        Yep. Lots of good music is being produced. Here’s some new tunes. Silver Synthetic from NOLA. Psych influenced jangly rock. https://youtu.be/y9y8xxaIZsw

        Microtonal psych stupidity from down under. https://youtu.be/ioqgrYorhkU

        King Gizzard & the Lizard Wizard released a new album last Friday. Pretty awesome if you like to put your psyche on autodrive for a while and groove to the rhythm and get weird.

      • kinnath

        The firsts was boring.

        But I am digging the second.

      • egould310

        King Gizzard are Aussie maniacs that play and produce a kabillion songs. Country, rock, country rock, garage, psych, thrash, kraut rock, and more, and more of it. They just keep making music with zero fucks given about what expectations of what the band is. Total goofballs and their videos are bonkers. Hilarious. But damn do they get down in a groove.

      • hoof_in_mouth

        I like King Gizzard as well

      • DrOtto

        So much this. I get a lot of wheel time during my work day and Satellite radio music (can’t do the talk shit) is what keeps me sane. I don’t have a favorite station. I flip around based on mood.

  13. Rebel Scum

    I picked 5 songs and queued them to the more awesome parts to keep it snappy, but they don’t dawdle much and jump right to it, give each one minute? It’s not weighty, it’s fun and original, it’s rock and roll!

    This claim about rock music is disputed. //Twitter

    • Sean

      “Account suspended”

  14. juris imprudent

    From the deadthread, jarflax said “…the people who will apparently be running things going forward…”

    Yeah, I’m not wild about Republicans much more than Democrats. The former are just the slightly less bad version of the latter. There’s no hope for freedom in this country – because the people have given up on it. I’m not sure why that is so, but it’s pretty hard to deny.

    • Jarflax

      I’m not wild about them either, but I am reaching a point af outright hatred toward Democrats. Not disapproval or disagreement, hatred. We laugh about the silliness of 57 genders juxtaposed with “we don’t need 23 kinds of deodorant” but it is not actually funny any more.

      • rhywun

        I am too. And I used to be one, if not ever an enthusiastic one.

      • juris imprudent

        And that shit cost them – they lost ground they gained in ’18 and I wouldn’t want the job of pumping up their hopes for ’22, as they completely whiffed on what they thought they could do this time around. Does that mean a glorious renaissance for liberty? No, just the slower slide down the slope. The more they push their grossest stupidity in the next two years, the worse they’ll do. I’m sure there are some who get that, but they can’t control the loudmouth lunatics.

        If they take a bloodbath in ’22 (and I think that’s fairly likely), both the old guard (and they are all old) in the House will be retired, and likely a whole new crew will seize power, but it won’t be the squad or any other progressives. Or, if it is, they guarantee themselves minority party status for quite some time. Either way, it isn’t like they’ll be a decent alternative to the sorry excuse called Republicans for most of the country. Now, if turnout can be driven back down onto it’s trajectory (from which this election was a deviation), then both can become worse because they’ve turned off the important mass of centrist (and not terribly bright) voters.

      • DrOtto

        I heard a similar argument put forward by some asshole on NPR regarding toilet paper and it wasn’t Bernie. He said there were 60 types and do we really need that many options. The conditioning is already starting for the great reset.

  15. LCDR_Fish

    Volbeat has an awesome live album that came out last year.

    Also a good collab with Sarah Blackwood from The Creepshow. https://youtu.be/7WdO9KhcUKE

    I like their western/Americana vibes. Some of those elements are most interesting from foreign bands – Thai rockabilly, Austrian pyschobilly, Danish western metal, etc

  16. Toxteth O'Grady

    https://youtu.be/cI9JJaEmkSQ

    The Eric Metaxas Radio Show

    Businessman Joe Oltmann has inside information of how Eric Coomer, a security genius with Dominion voting systems, assured Antifa members that Trump would never win the election. Follow the show: https://www.metaxastalk.com/

    • Jerms

      Always looking for something new listen to, gonna put these songs on my iphone, i usually need to listen a few times to know if i really like it. You mentioned Social Distortion and my ears perked up, they’re my all time favorite band, ive seen them many times. Thanks for the article.

    • Lackadaisical

      The girls in that are extra cute.

      The song wasn’t bad either, though didn’t evoke glibs to me.

      • Sean

        Apparently I was drunk by then. I don’t remember posting this. *shrug*

    • Ted S.

      Does intelligent life exist on Earth?

      • juris imprudent

        Not if you look at a common example of the dominant species.

      • TARDis

        Well, it’s less than 5%, but yes. It’s here.

  17. commodious spittoon

    THIS IN NO WAY AFFECTS YOUR ACCOUNT HERE AT GLIBS CENTRAL.

    It’s just, she’s really caught my eye, and I’d like to know who she is so I can concentrate how much I like her, you know, in case she resists

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Watch til the end, Alex Jones!

    • Rebel Scum

      Love me some Razor. Dude is always on point.

    • pistoffnick

      You can be pissed.

      Or you can be pistoff.

      Welcome! Let the hate flow through you. We have low card snacks over there. The coke and automatic machine gun vending machines are down the hall.

      • pistoffnick

        Low carb

      • Sean

        Charcuterie board?

        *polishes monocle*

    • Gdragon

      He’s the best, there are very few things on youtube that I watch every single time but he’s one of them.

  18. kinnath

    I stopped buying music in the mid to late 2000s, when DRM meant that I couldn’t play a CD in my computer or rip it to my hard drive.

    I have never used any of the music streaming services, and no interest in starting now.

    Radio is utter shit these days.

    I do have Sirius/XM in two of my vehicles, but I keep the channel pretty much tuned to classic rock.

    So, why should I bother looking for new music, when I literally have 40 years of music collected and playable any time I am sitting in front of my computer?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I’m going back to Pandora, see you guys later,

    • Nephilium

      Because every once in a while you find a wonderful new band singing in they style you like, with modern beats.

      • Nephilium

        On the Zoom, so I can’t listen now, but link saved.

      • Mojeaux

        Lots of good electroswing compilations, too. I cannot for the life of me find the one that got me into it. Here’s another fun one: https://youtu.be/FALYmqt-7TQ

      • kinnath

        Like this.

      • Gender Traitor

        So fun!

      • kinnath

        I have all these wonderful people around here that post links to cool stuff.

        This means I get to be lazy.

      • straffinrun

        I agree. Music peaked with Cutting Crew.

    • LCDR_Fish

      What? I still buy cds for some artists – but rip using iTunes. I guess its different than an mp3, but I’ve never had issues even with imports.

      Except for a couple Russian or Serbian OST discs that came with the DVD. Audio tracks played – in a DVD player but were difficult to coax off.

      • kinnath

        Mid 2000s is when DRM was being introduced (heavily). Once I couldn’t rip a significant number of my CDs, I stopped buying.

        I did get a 50-year-anniversy remix of Sgt Pepper. I won’t even play in my computer.

  19. straffinrun

    Just finished listening to this: Debate on Postmodernism. My initial reaction was that I mostly agreed with both of them. The disagreement they have IMO is that Thad rejects the melding of PM and Neo marxism and Michael says that the two aren’t mutually exclusive (in fact they help support each other). Personally, I’m sticking with being hyper skeptical of truth claims and both Thad and Michael would be fine with that.

    https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7x6Oc1iTv3A

  20. egould310

    Greens and cabbage are cleaned and chopped. Turkey is warming up on the countertop. Gonna’ rub herb butter ( rosemary, sage, thyme) all over that Turkey and inside the skin. Alot of herb butter. Salt and pepper. And then back in the fridge to rest till tomorrow morning.

    Lou Malnati’s cooking in the oven; deep dish for dinner!

    Wife says she’s gonna make a peach pie, later.

    • Nephilium

      The pies were made earlier. Tomorrow it’s just the girlfriend and I, so we’re doing things on the small. Pork tenderloin wrapped in prosciutto and puff pastry; Rotini bacon and cheese; twice baked potatoes (chorizo for a couple; bacon for the others); roasted veggies; frozen yeast rolls (I skimped here).

      As I looked over the list, I realized that there’s no need for gravy this year.

      • straffinrun

        Believe you, but I think the rest of us are making up these elaborate descriptions of our Thanksgiving feast. Fritos and Mr Pibb is more likely.

      • Nephilium

        If you truly want, I’ll put up a picture of my plate tomorrow. 🙂

      • Gender Traitor

        We’re having Arby’s cranberry deep-fried turkey wraps. Tom T picked ’em up today. I thought I was going to manage to eat half-assed healthy, but then Tom went to Sam’s and bought one of those pumpkin pies as big as a steering wheel. For the two of us.

      • straffinrun

        “Big as a steering wheel.” That’s the kind of description I can sink my teeth into like I got into a head on with Escalade.

      • Nephilium

        My Zen wouldn’t deal with not doing some cooking for tomorrow.

        I’m mildly upset with myself that it’s been so long since I’ve done lots of dicing, that I’ve gotten a blister on my finger.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Cream of mushroom is simmering away. I just got the flavor where I want it, and I only hope that the worchestershire doesn’t take over as the liquid simmers off. I can’t tell yet if I went too heavy or not.

        Onions are fried and ready for topping the green bean casserole, so all that’ll be left is blanching the green beans, combining, and reheating tomorrow.

        Pumpkin pie is next once I get the cream of mushroom off the stove. I’m not sure whether I’ll just prep the custard tonight or whether I’ll bake it. I’m quickly running out of time tonight, and alarm #1 goes odd at 7:45, holiday or no. Alarm #2 will be going off every 2-3 hours all night, but thankfully wife takes care of that one.

        I’m debating getting the mirepoix set up for the turkey drip pan, but I may just do it tomorrow. Food needs to be ready at 2:30, so I’m not gonna be hurting for time.

        After looking through a bunch of y’alls recipes, I went with a buttermilk biscuit recipe from ATK. Should be easy enough to do tomorrow first thing.

      • slumbrew

        I made two kinds of ice cream, but that’s it. Something to be said for someone else hosting.

    • KSuellington

      You take your turkey out the fridge a day before?

    • Tulip

      I’m making a duck breast, mashed potatoes,, green beans and mushrooms, and homemade cranberry sauce. Later this weekend, I’ll make an orange cake with a cranberry filling.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Really putting the bang in early Showa era pop.

  21. KSuellington

    I love music. I’m constantly finding new (often old) great stuff. Classic soul, rock, afrobeat, jazz, soundtrack stuff, yacht rock, outlaw country, electronic, Brazilian, and Cuban tend to be most of it. I have recommend them a dozen times here, and I will again. I am due for another donation to them as they put out 24/7 commercial free music with no subscription fees, it’s all listener supported donations for a couple dozen channels of awesome stuff. They even have 3 or 4 Xmas music stations (Jolly Ole Soul being my favorite).

    https://somafm.com/

    • straffinrun

      Lots of fraud? Sure. But the refs have left the field and the other team is already in the locker room. I suppose it’s good to expose as much as possible, but the game is over.

      • Rebel Scum

        Someone is a negative Nancy.

      • straffinrun

        This obviously wasn’t the first time fraud on a massive scale was committed. Not being negative, just saying that you’d need the media and an unbiased judiciary to turn this around.

      • Rebel Scum

        Or you need Orange Man Rad and his team of ruthless lawyers. We are at an impasse. This leftist assault needs to be halted and defeated.

        Extraordinary claims have been made. I find many to be plausible. But extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. As such, I am waiting, watching and hopeful*.

        *despite my general cynical nature. And I say that as someone who is young-ish.

      • straffinrun

        Silver lining regardless: democracy has been exposed as a farce.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        Is it just me or is this all starting to sound a little like ‘No one I knew voted for Nixon”?

      • blackjack

        It’s been exactly there for quite some time.

      • Brochettaward

        I fully admit that’s part of my problem with all of this. Not so much that I don’t know Biden voters as much as I don’t know a single person who voted Trump who changed. The numbers say he gained votes. But somehow a guy who didn’t even campaign shattered records…when you count votes that we didn’t know existed until after about 4AM on election day.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        But somehow a guy who didn’t even campaign shattered records

        Again, we had four years of people telling us they didn’t vote for Trump but against Hell-ary. Why is it beyond the realm of possibility that a bunch of people didn’t vote for Biden but against Trump?

      • blackjack

        Overlooks the evil that the left has made clear it’s willing to do to Trump. And, the statistical anomalies the election results produced. And the desperate way the left has approached the issue of voter fraud in this election. And, all the reports of strange behavior on the part of the vote counters, like all wearing Biden swag and cheering after they got the red team observers kicked out and the late night count stalls and the vote dumps that favored Biden at a rate of 99.9% And… well you get the idea.

      • Brochettaward

        Trump won an election with lower turnout.

        Biden won an election where they suddenly changed all the rules and where mail ballots were sent out to entire states of people and laws to validate the ballots were disregarded entirely.

        And as of 4AM on election night, Trump was on path to winning. The media had 95% of the votes counted or whatever in wisconsin with Trump having a 5 point lead and it evaporated. He had a 100,000 vote lead in Michigan. Gone. 700,000 vote lead in PA. And per the media at the time, the vast majority of the votes were in.

        I’m a veteran who lives in Florida. My social circle is mostly conservative and I’m biased. But the numbers don’t make much sense to my simple mind. Not unless no one knew what they were doing on election night.

      • Jarflax

        Again, we had four years of people telling us they didn’t vote for Trump but against Hell-ary. Why is it beyond the realm of possibility that a bunch of people didn’t vote for Biden but against Trump?

        That is an entirely believable narrative. I’d even have believed it coupled with down ballot victories by Republicans. My skepticism about this election is firmly based on three factors:

        1. I have minimal trust of any political figure or bureaucrat, but that accelerates to an active distrust of the Democrats. They have openly rigged their own primaries, time and again we have seem congressional races that looked like Republican wins flip late at night due to found ballots, and after four years of listening to their hysteria about Trump I think it is obvious that the willingness to cheat was widespread.

        2. I was watching the election night coverage and watched the contested States vote counts freeze for hours and then suddenly see a statistically unlikely swing toward Biden. Up until 11 pm it looked like a rout for Trump. He had solid leads in Michigan, Wisconsin, and Georgia, he had a commanding lead in Pennsylvania, and Arizona and Nevada looked tight. In Pennsylvania his lead coupled with the percentage they were reporting counted appeared to be virtually unassailable. Then the vote counts froze.

        3. The statistical analysis of various bellwether States, Counties, and internal metrics in States that flipped to Biden WI, MI, and PA in particular demonstarte that something unusual occured. That is not conclusive evidence of fraud, this election had a couple of unique aspects even if no fraud occured, with vote by mail and Trump being Trump.

        It is possible that my perception of 2 and 3 are confirmation bias on my part, because of my feelings about #1. But in a situation where I have no way of obtaining first hand knowledge I have no choice but to form my opinion from the evidence I see and what I saw election night looked to me like fraud. It is as though I walk past a windo and see a gout of blood splash in the window and then see a man holding a knife walk in front. When I learn the next morning that a woman was slashed to death in that house I am going to have a high degree of confidence that the man I saw with the Knife killed her. Now possibly he is innocent. There are other possible explanations, but he is going to have a job on his hands convincing me of his innocence. And if his friends go out of there way to shut down any conversation, or inquiry about the case because “You have no proof!” it is not going to make me more likely to believe his innocence.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yes.

        I joked about disparate impact analysis, but the statistical analysis without actual proof of fraud is looking more and more like it.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Just like with disparate impact, the statistical analysis should be a starting point. It’s an invitation to gather more info.

        The more info that I’ve seen is fishy as fuck, but I don’t know that I’ve run across a smoking gun.

        I was watching VA all election night and have no clue how it flipped when it did. Unless mail-in ballots simply weren’t accounted for by the reporting precincts, then these ballots came from nowhere. There could be a simple explanation or it could be sketchy behavior. Dunno.

        I still haven’t heard an explanation for the anomalies in the Edison feed. There could be a simple explanation or it could be sketchy behavior. Dunno.

        I still haven’t heard an explanation for why all the swing states shut down counting at the same time. There could be a simple explanation or it could be sketchy behavior. Dunno.

        I still haven’t heard an explanation for why people are reporting that monitors were being excluded from ballot counting rooms. There could be a simple explanation or it could be sketchy behavior. Dunno.

        Lots of questions. Very few answers. Doesn’t ameliorate my complete lack of institutional trust.

      • straffinrun

        It’s possible Biden won. It’s certain there was cheating.

    • creech

      I would think every (or most) precinct in America has Republican poll watchers, or committeemen or judges of election. What’s so damned hard about them verifying the votes at their individual precinct and uploading all the way to the state level? Forensic reviews may take beyond Jan. 20th but image if a “smoking gun” could be shown to the Supreme Court demonstrating – conclusively – that enough electoral votes were stolen from Trump to change the outcome? At the very least, the 2022 Election would be very interesting, followed by the rapid impeachment of Biden and Harris.

      • blackjack

        That’s a huge part of the problem. Observers were shut out. Severely. There’s a hundred reasons to suspect fraud in this election, and the horrible treatment of observers is just one. The states that counted most ( sorry, pun) all worked overtime to hide what they were doing. The solid states just counted like normal and provided results as expected.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I would think every (or most) precinct in America has Republican poll watchers, or committeemen or judges of election.

        Nope. When I did it for the democrats (long story), I was the only one there besides the poll workers. Most precincts are empty besides the electioneers out front.

      • Urthona

        I predict this is gonna start to change.

  22. hayeksplosives

    Do you want a civil war? Because this is how you get a civil war!

    /Mallory Archer

    Los Angeles to cut water and power to homes hosting large gatherings amid pandemic
    Los Angeles Mayor Eric Garcetti said Wednesday that he is authorizing the Los Angeles Department of Water and Power to shut off utility service to properties where large parties and gatherings are held in violation of public safety orders. Watch his remarks here.

    • blackjack

      That was months ago. Now we’re into the “Starve a flu” period where eating is outlawed. Just ’cause.

    • Brochettaward

      I mean, I’m pretty sure that when dealing with services basically nationalized by the state, you are dealing with some constitutional issues when talking about cutting them off. But what do I know. I’m not some fancy judge.

    • Q Continuum

      So… the definition of hydraulic despotism?

    • Mojeaux

      GMTA. I ALMOST linked that earlier. Rick Beato #FTW

    • blackjack

      CAD has ruined a whole bunch of things too. The limitations of hand drawing and building led to things that were substantially more beautiful than the conformist items of the modern world. It’s helped a lot of outright functional aspects, but straight wrecked aesthetics. A sea of jelly bean cars. I understand that cafe standards helped, but computer design would have done most of the damage regardless.

      • straffinrun

        I like that “jelly bean” description. I usually say they look like tipped over shampoo bottles.

      • Mojeaux

        jelly bean cars

        d00d, aerodynamics. Just going with the flow to get some of that sweet, sweet fuel efficiency.

    • straffinrun

      Corona is the left’s version or Hussein’s WMD. Surprised the didn’t get Colin Powell to wave a vial of it around at the UN.

    • Gender Traitor

      I’d just been thinking – isn’t it usually a sign of abuse when someone tries to cut you off from family and friends?

      • Plinker762

        Cult behavior

    • Q Continuum

      Not paying attention is an effective countermeasure.

      • Mojeaux

        ^^^^

    • Brochettaward

      Who was that pussy reporter who had it and said spare me the charts that show 99.7% survival rates because when it is your body that could fail, it’s totally different?

      Yea, we are just a country of pussies.

    • Mojeaux

      Brilliant.

      • Heroic Mulatto

        Eh. “Coming to America was the best movie ever made.”

      • Rebel Scum

        Someone doesn’t want to Party All the Time

      • Mojeaux

        I classified it as hyperbole.

        But not The Hyperbole.

      • KSuellington

        After Eddie got caught with the transexual hooker he really turned off the R rating and went hard PG and sucked for a while. He made a crapton of money doing so but nothing of interest. I liked his return to R with Dolemite. That was easily one of the best new movies I’ve seen of the last decade.

    • Brochettaward

      It takes 1.5 minutes and I think he still buries the lead. It’s China. It’s an attempt to appeal to the international market.

      CGI is also a big issue.

      • Mojeaux

        When you can tune things to machine perfection, it hits somewhere between uncanny valley and uninteresting.

    • Q Continuum

      “Movies are made for 16 year-olds and China”

      In a nutshell.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Yet movies and tv series actually made for China are often better than Hollywood ones.

    • Gdragon

      The Bee just keeps getting better and better ?

  23. one true athena

    I saw this and thought of the SF post today…

    (except it’s the Hair, but same feeling, I thought.)

    The Primordial Hair

    • Urthona

      It’s not dead so much as just really unpopular.

    • Brochettaward

      The whole article was available to me. And it’s sad how much time they spent explaining her side of the story.

    • KSuellington

      “ As recently as Nov. 12, Meieran was telling Willamette Week that Oregon needed to return to a full-scale shutdown akin to the stay-at-home orders imposed in March — even though she was already on holiday.

      “We need a real shutdown, and this is something I would pursue in Multnomah County if the governor does not do it at the state level,” she told the paper. “I doubled masked, with an N95, and didn’t eat or drink” on the flight, Meieran said. “It felt much safer than going to a mall in Oregon for a few hours.”

      Her blatant hypocrisy and disdain for the free choice of others is galling, but the fact that Americans have largely bent over and taken this type of restrictions of freedom is enraging.

      • rhywun

        Most Americans mistakenly still “trust” government. It’s as simple as that.

        Except they hate Congress. Go figure.

    • rhywun

      The last song they did that I like actually does rock.

      • limey

        Nice. First suggestion afterwards, from the mighty algorithm, was this.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      What was that?

  24. CPRM

    Old bands are still making new rock, that’s where I hang.

    Powerman 5000 – Black Lipstick (Official Music Video)
    from the album The Noble Rot, available August 28, 2020.

      • CPRM

        On February 6, 2020, the band released the first new song from their forthcoming and renamed album Project: Regeneration Vol. 1 titled “Hollow (Project Regeneration)”.[43] and announced that Project Regeneration would now consist of two volumes, both with at least 10 songs, all of them with vocals by Wayne Static. The album was slated to be released May 15, 2020, but was eventually pushed to be released on July 10, 2020 due to the manufacturing delays associated with the COVID-19 pandemic.[44][45]

    • CPRM

      I’ve seen people refer to PM5K’s current sound as Dark Wave (ala dark New Wave) and you can certainly hear that on this track.

      The song that follows that on the album is a cover We Got The Beat.

  25. Tres Cool

    For all ya’all bragging on your fancy thanksgiving meals, I can git-r-done for just under $10

    https://postimg.cc/149gsXJ5

    • CPRM

      If I get ambitious enough later, I got a smoked duck breast (bought fully cooked) and will make some poutine.

    • Gustave Lytton

      If you’re giving thanks, that’s what counts.

      • Tres Cool

        I was actually elated when I stumbled across turkey SPAM a couple weeks ago, as its one of the more elusive Spam varieties in these parts.

      • hayeksplosives

        I didn’t know that Turkey Spam is a thing!

        One regret I have about Minnesota is that I never drove to see the Spam Museum in Austin, MN

      • limey

        I’m disappointed that you didn’t post that exact comment 20+ times.

      • Tres Cool

        I think it was like $3.29/can @ my Kroger. Shit didnt last long….gone the next day

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        How’s the taste? It might be worth it ordering one can just to try it.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Do you like salt?

  26. Gustave Lytton

    Interesting what happens if you tell Siri “intergalactic planetary”.

    • Tres Cool

      RIP Adam “MCA” Yauch

    • Tres Cool

      Why would you even do that?

  27. Tres Cool

    Keith Moon’s mom ?

    • limey

      Oh dear. Well it really is 5 o’clock somewhere this time.

      Having said that, I’m fairly certain old Jimmy Buffet would approve wholeheartedly of it being 4:20.

    • commodious spittoon

      Wake up hungover, drink rum till cured.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I woke up this morning and I got myself a beer.

      Is the end near and the future uncertain too?

      • commodious spittoon

        Come on baby, take a chance with us

      • deadhead

        Hey Mr. Spittoon. It’s been a while. I hope all is well. Happy Thanksgiving.

      • commodious spittoon

        It’s been, and all is improbably well, and a Happy to you, too.

  28. hayeksplosives

    I am tired enough I should be sleeping like a log. But I’m awake, dang it!

    I shall flit aimlessly around the interstate in hopes my restless brain drifts drone alpha waves into delta waves that indicate sweet sleep.