Winston’s Mom Does the Mourning Lynx

by | Dec 18, 2020 | Daily Links | 400 comments

Remember, New York is doing it right.  Florida is doing it wrong, very wrong….very, very wrong.

Who doesn’t have China’s dick in their ass?

Speaking of China dick.  instead of “Buy American”, how about create a more open and competitive market to undercut pricing on shitty Chinese goods.  Might work better than mandating everything cost twice as much because you have to price in the union smoke break.

Not that I’m totally against the union smoke break, its an opportunity for niche work.  Except teachers unions, fuck them.

I don’t know what’s geting everyones knickers in a twist about this broad.  I like her.  She’s got spunk.  She can get even more spunk working for me.

Hunter Baden is the smartest man I know in an intellectual capacity,”. Good greif, we’re fucked.

C’mon, that is clearly an editorial!

Finally, Krugabe says this isn’t 2008

No really, its not 2008 professor shitbag?  This guy needs a gold bar-shaped, bleeding head wound before he figures it out. We just pulled trillions of dollars out of Keynes’ butthole for a decade and then stopped working for a year over something with a 99% survival rate.   Lets create more dollars we can use as toilet paper—because that might actually be more useful for trade. Then what hits ya?  Household balance sheets?  From the right wing nut-jobs at NBC:

The number of Americans living in poverty grew by 8 million since May, according to a Columbia University study, which found an increase in poverty rates after early coronavirus relief ended without more to follow.

What planet are you living on?

About The Author

Winston's Mom

Winston's Mom

Biological mother of Winston.

400 Comments

  1. Nephilium

    “Who could have possibly predicted that we would go into a depression?”
    –Every journalist in 2022

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      Hey Neph! We never get to talk anymore. Heard you bought a new TV.

      • Nephilium

        No need, I haven’t fallen into any. 🙂

        Hope things are going well with your seven day work weeks. Today is my last day of work for the year.

        /looks at calendar filled with meetings

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Dammit! I always get you two mixed up. Sorry, I drink some…

      • Nephilium

        You get me and Tres confused?

        /wanders off muttering

      • Not Adahn

        You don’t brew tall cans?

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Two middle-aged balding white guys? Well excuuuuse Me! 😉

      • Nephilium

        /looks at avatar

        /looks at Festus

        /looks at Tres’ avatar

        /compares Tres’ facial hair to mine

      • Tres Cool

        Not sure how I feel about that….

        Current titty status: conflicted

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        See above. Y’all look the same to me.

      • SDF-7

        “The glibs outside looked from Festus to Tres, and from Tres to Festus, and from Festus to Tres again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.” (apologies to Orwell).

    • Breet Pharara

      Correction:

      “Of course we went into depression after Trump destroyed all that is sacred and LITERALLY killed 1 billion Americans with his bare hands. Thankfully Harris was able to step up after Biden’s suicide by bullet to the back of the head to keep the depression from being even worse.”

      ~Every journalist in 2022

      • C. Anacreon

        One of Trump’s “lies” per PBS was he said ,in his colloquial way, that “no one saw this pandemic coming”. Lie, the fact-checkers said, because indeed there were scientific papers in the past that warned some day the US would face a pandemic. But the same fact checkers, if there is a major recession/depression in 2022, will all agree that no one saw it coming, and perhaps even cite Krugnuts.

    • Rebel Scum

      +1 Drumpf economy.

      Now get ready to saddle up for the Biden BOOM.

  2. Animal

    Krugman is a cheap hack, a willful idiot, and an asshole. I just can’t think of enough bad things to say about him.

    • juris imprudent

      There has to be worse things, because unlike Tom Friedman, who also fits all of those descriptions, Krugman once was an intelligent and respectable economist. There is nothing more amusing than citing his early professional work in the field to answer his complaints and stupidity as a denizen of the NYT. He had that, and gave it up to become a charlatan. I don’t know any word(s) that adequately describes that.

      • Breet Pharara

        Hey Krugman needs to eat! I hear selling your soul is actually quite profitable.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        “Five Bucks, same as downtown, Bart!”

      • Pope Jimbo

        It has to be easier to sleep in and toss off a couple of insipid columns a week that you know will never be challenged by anyone because you write for the NYT than it would be to keep doing hard research and writing papers that are challenged by really smart people.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        See? This is why I became a custodian.

      • Fourscore

        “Hard research”

        Buy low, sell high…or maybe I got that backwards…yeah, must have.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        “I don’t know any word(s) that adequately describes that.”

        Partisan shitbag works nicely.

      • Animal

        Or just cunte.

  3. Tres Cool

    “Who doesn’t have China’s dick in their ass?”

    I think you have that reversed: Backdoor to Chyna.

    • Tres Cool

      /pours some out for Joanie Laurer. RIP.

    • rhywun

      Chyna explore her sexuality, by trying anal.

      LOL. Nice and succinct summary.

      • Tres Cool

        I haven’t viewed that particular classic, but I’m betting there really isn’t much more to add.

  4. The Late P Brooks

    Mister and Mrs Pence getting inoculated live on my teevee.

    SCIENCE!!!!!!!!

      • blackjack

        They accidentally gave her the “Cosby” formulation. It inoculates you from being able to testify.

      • Winston's Mom

        Savage

      • Not Adahn

        If you want to make sure your staged vaccination photo-op has fewer side efects, just simulate getting vaccinated!

    • Rebel Scum

      Placebo.

    • Idle Hands

      I’m not saying it would be funny if one of our science wise betters went into anaphylactic shock live on tv but it wouldn’t not be funny to me either.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Oh I would laugh and laugh.

      • C. Anacreon

        Just got the vaccine this morning. Dose #2 in three weeks.

        So far no seizures or hives, and the whole process was fast and painless.

      • grrizzly

        Sounds great.

  5. The Late P Brooks

    Household balance sheets?

    Aggregate savings rate, FTW!

    I can’t even be bothered to try to figure out what Krugabe’s driving at.

    The Biden economy will take off like a rocket! Not like the disastrous collapse in 2017.

    • Nephilium

      Challenger economy here we come!

    • Spartacus

      The stock and real estate markets are still being propped up, so the balance sheets of anyone with equity in one or both of those probably looks OK. As soon as the fed turns off the tap, brace yourselves.

      The REAL point is that as long as OMB is in charge, we are on the edge of apocalypse. Now that we have elected Uncle Joe and his Top Men Black/Brown/LGBTQ+++ to office, everything will be fine.

      • prolefeed

        We had about 24% inflation last year. Not the fake inflation reported by the feds, but the 24% increase in the dollar supply. So, as people catch on to that, the prices of goods and services will rise 24% in the newly devalued fiat dollars.

        Bad time to be cash rich, IMO. Own assets – real estate, stocks, stuff like that.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        ‘Members back to 1981, shudders.

      • Gustave Lytton

        That 24% is only part of it too. Supply curve for many goods and services shifted leftward in the last year as well.

      • Fourscore

        So why am I getting 1.3 % bump on my SS check for cost-of-living? Surely the government wouldn’t lie.

  6. rhywun

    The number of Americans living in poverty grew by 8 million since May, according to a Columbia University study

    …which no doubt concludes that the only solution is to promote policies that result in even more “poverty” which the government can swoop in to “ameliorate”.

    • Winston's Mom

      I only skimmed through it, dear, but yes.

      • Not Adahn

        You didn’t read it carefully before commenting? Winston’s Mom is one of us!

    • Chipwooder

      All part of the plan – get people desperate enough that they will be begging for federal money.

      • Rebel Scum

        +1 Great Reset

  7. Spartacus

    So, what does that chart look like once stimulus FedGovBux are removed from the GDP?

  8. The Late P Brooks

    It would be reasonable for teachers to oppose schools being open if Covid-19 posed a significant risk to students.

    As if they give fuck about the students.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Schools exist to provide teachers with jobs.

      • Plisade

        Schools exist to provide unions with dues payers.

      • Not Adahn

        Schools exist to launder tax money to election campaigns.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Bang-Fucking-On!

      • db

        *public* schools.

        But yes, this is as succinct and accurate a description of the workings of this system as I’ve ever seen. It also goes for just about any government program that is staffed by unionized employees.

  9. Rebel Scum

    Who doesn’t have China’s dick in their ass?

    Me, obvs.

    The ad highlights how during the Georgia Senate primary Ossoff failed to include in his campaign financial disclosures that his media production company Insight TWI received a payment from PCCW, which is run by a CCP member Wang Xiaochu and owned by a man who has openly opposed Hong Kong’s pro-democracy protests. Two months later, after the June 9 primary, Ossoff quietly updated his financial disclosures to include the payment from PCCW.

    Ossoff is a commie. This was already known.

    • WTF

      And Ossoff will soon be a US Senator, because nothing will be done to prevent the upcoming fraud.

  10. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    That b/w photo makes my tummy feel weird…

    • juris imprudent

      Speaking of weirdness, how’d the podcast on Slab City go?

      • juris imprudent

        Dammit, not enough coffee yet – that should be posed to Yusuf, not Festus.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        We’re pen pals but not the same person.

  11. Rebel Scum

    Speaking of China dick. instead of “Buy American”, how about create a more open and competitive market to undercut pricing on shitty Chinese goods. Might work better than mandating everything cost twice as much because you have to price in the union smoke break.

    Word.

    • UnCivilServant

      Hard to undercut the price of slave labor save with robot slaves.

      Automation now!

  12. Rebel Scum

    The Teachers Unions are Keeping the Schools Closed

    Fire everyone.

  13. Rebel Scum

    I like her. She’s got spunk.

    Is this the one with the attitude that Rudy had to reign in? She seems fun.

    • WTF

      I feel kind of bad about her upcoming suicide/unfortunate accident.

      • Rebel Scum

        Mellissa Carone did not kill herself.

        But seriously she should have some kind of protection and Rudy should be aware of that.

  14. robc

    One thing positive from Krugman: The MMT bullshit is so bad that even he has called it out as bullshit.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I hadn’t caught that.

      I find that humorous given his trillion dollar coin episode.

      • robc

        I think he agrees with the end results, he just thinks their economics is incoherent and bad.

    • PBRstreetgang

      Maybe I don’t understand MMT, but here’s a brief defense I found from an MMT supporter: “MMT supporters have responded by saying that their critics don’t truly understand how modern monetary economies work. According to them, in countries with a currency of their own, governments don’t face a hard budget constraint; the government can always print additional money to pay for higher expenditures”.
      If this were true and the gov can ‘always print additional money’ why would taxes be needed (other than to take wealthy folks down a peg)?

      • prolefeed

        If this were true and the gov can ‘always print additional money’ why would taxes be needed (other than to take wealthy folks down a peg)?

        Because there are consequences to devaluing the fiat money – hyperinflation like Weimar Republic or Zimbabwe. Having a stable currency makes trade better, and most wealth comes from or is reliant upon trading, i.e. moving stuff from lower value uses to higher value uses.

      • robc

        MMT says there arent consequences.

      • prolefeed

        And Girlfriend Experience hookers say they love you. Don’t make it so.

      • robc

        Hence, Krugman ripping into them.

      • juris imprudent

        First, what countries don’t have their own currency? That is the most trivially stupid point to make. That money in an international market for money is just one more commodity of a value that the govt that prints it cannot control.

        Second, this isn’t a modern theory at all, it is rehashed chartalism (money is a matter of law, not a commodity) from a German economist most notable for setting the stage for the Weimar monetary collapse. Bismarck financed WWI on credit in Germany – the premise being the expected reparations/settlement in their favor would provide the funds to pay off that debt. Oops.

        MMT is economic snake oil.

      • robc

        Doesn’t Ecuador use the US dollar? Isn’t that where all the Sacajawea coins ended up? Did I actually spell that correctly?

      • juris imprudent

        And Singapore was on the British pound for a long time too as I recall. Point being, while there may be exceptions, it is hardly the stunning insight the MMT idiots propound it to be.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m trying to remember the handle of the commenter at TOS who was constantly pushing MMT. He averred that we simply did not see the subtleties of how the system worked, a failure of imagination on our part.

        I was reminded of MLM spiels.

      • robc

        Scott Sumner has been blogging a bunch on MMT recently at econlib, lots of the responses from MMTers are gibberish.

      • leon

        A few Nuances. It’s not just that a Sovreign country has to print their own money (Something not true for the entire Eurozone), but they must also denominate their debt in their own currency. In this sense their is no budgetary constraint since they can either borrow, or print as much money as needed and people will accept it.

        But yes this isn’t a stunning insight. Usually it is a shell game where they pretend to acknowlege inflation and then ignore it. Also they end up with a very weird conclusion that the government must first SPEND money in order to create it before anyone else can usit and so taxes are just the way the governmen takes money out of existence to combat inflation. Because of this they say that any decrease in government debt, decreases the wealth that the private sector has.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It takes me a while to parse those types of articles because of the arcane terms referring to various financial vehicles.

  15. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    I made this funny before but Victoria Jackson is looking mighty fine for 61 years old.

    • Not Adahn

      Was she the chubby blonde, or the skinny brunette on SNL?

      • SDF-7

        Blonde. She didn’t seem chubby to me at the time (though she was later on… but then again, so am I relative to my youth, so who cares?)

        You might also remember her from such memorable films as UHF….

      • Chipwooder

        I wouldn’t quite say chubby, but she was a little curvy. Jan Hooks (the skinny brunette) was definitely thinner.

      • Not Adahn

        Chipmunk cheeks, accentuated by her tendency to pile her hair on top of her head.

      • Old Man With Candy

        I knew her ex-husband. Many stories…

  16. Rebel Scum

    knickers in a twist

    Be sure to annunciate when you use this phrase.

  17. Nephilium

    Why do I have the feeling that the warning label on this will be epic?

    • rhywun

      +1 carcinogen

    • Plisade

      California style whiskey? Sorry, I don’t like mine fruity and full of nuts.

  18. robc

    Top 6 baseball birthdays today:

    6. Ronald Acuna, Jr. — which is impressive, to be up to #6 in only 3 seasons…he could reach the top for today!
    5. Zoilo Versailles — great name
    4. Jim Clancy — not the author
    3. Joe Randa
    2. Bill Skowron

    Overall a pretty mediocre list, Acuna will pass all of those very soon.

    Wait…what? There is one more.

    Oh yes, #1 – Ty Cobb – yeah, I guess Acuna won’t end up #1 after all. 151 WAR, almost a full season all by himself.

    • robc

      I should mention, before the Minnesota Nice comes after me, that Zoilo did win the AL MVP in 1965. He had 7.2 WAR that year, his 2nd best year was 2.6.

    • The Gunslinger

      Joe Randa aka ‘The Joker’

  19. SDF-7

    Devil’s advocate for a moment (wait a sec… Winston’s Mom isn’t an advocate for the devil?) — Florida and Texas have a much warmer average climate. (Northern Texas being an exception, I know). Given the uptick in the winter / downtick in the summer — some of the relative delta could simply be attributable to Florida winter == New York spring, etc.

    And re: China and open markets — I think competitive is the key there. I think it is inherently uncompetitive when you’re competing with slave labor and work camp gathered resources. So getting to such a market seems problematic. Plus, the idiocy of all the Western companies having to “get in on the China market” when that means handing over all your IP (to see the CCP shell corp start up to become your competition) — if I were God Emperor, I’d a) stay away from the damned sand worms and b) embargo China completely until they stop that crap. Sell to everyone else who does believe in open markets, let them wither on the vine. Then again, I’m not truly libertarian and all…

    • robc

      Being the devil’s devil’s advocate — Considering the spring deaths in NY, you would think the comorbidity population would be diminished.

    • rhywun

      And NY is a bigger target for international travel, esp. from oh, say, China.

    • rhywun

      I think that old saw that trading with China will “make them free” has been pretty comprehensively trashed.

      I agree that “Buy American” is a dog-whistle for corporate welfare. And it plays on Americans’ reluctance to trade with commies. Hell, it’s up there with “Black Lives Matter” as a slogan that says one thing and means another.

      How about we replace “Buy American” with “Buy Free” or something.

      • robc

        While I prefer absolute free trade, as an in-between solution, I have suggested the Freedom Tariff before. Tariff rates are based on the country of origin based on some freedom scale (pick one, doesn’t matter too much which). Canada/western Europe/Australia etc would have a 0% tariff rate. As freedom diminished, tariff rate goes up exponentially. North Korea/Cuba would be about a 100% tariff. China would be high, maybe 80%. Mexico would have a tariff but it would be reasonably low. You get the idea.

        If implemented, ALL other tariffs would go away. This is it. And as countries became freer, their rate would go down, sometimes dramatically. Venezuela, on the other hand, would have had a low tariff rate 30 years ago and a high one today by this method.

      • prolefeed

        Tariffs are a tax. They are paid for by the consumers, in this case, Americans. This would be social engineering – and would feed the beast.

        Unintended consequences are still consequences.

      • robc

        I agree, hence my first clause. I needed to throw [sld] brackets all over the place up there.

      • prolefeed

        The best policy IMO is to unilaterally get rid of trade destroying taxation, in this case tariffs, for every country.

      • robc

        Yes, that is the best policy.

        I was discussing 2nd best policy.

      • prolefeed

        Trade has made China economically more free. People there are not as dirt poor as they were. They still have a commie government dampening economic and especially civil liberties. But, look at the abject misery in North Korea to see what China could be more like without the loosening of trade restrictions.

        Buy the goods and services with the price and quality you want, and that will tend to make the poorest people on the planet more prosperous, because of leveraging comparative advantage.

      • robc

        I think you have causation backwards in the case of China and North Korea.

      • prolefeed

        I don’t understand. What is the causation you think is going on? Not trying to be a dick or anything, I genuinely don’t get what you think is going on. Convince me.

      • robc

        I think China loosened restrictions, hence got more trade. NK hasn’t, so hasn’t.

        China didn’t become freer because of the trade, they got more trade because they got slightly freer.

        It is like Cuba blaming the US embargo for their economic problems, despite trading with the rest of the world. We should end the embargo, but that won’t make Cuba any freer.

        I like the Don Boudreaux analogy, not sure if he originated it: a trade war is like when your enemy shoots himself in the foot, you get back at him by shooting yourself in the foot.

      • prolefeed

        I agree with you if we’re talking about countries in the aggregate – if the government of the country gets rid of some of the restrictions that have been keeping trade and economic growth from happening, of course that will result in more prosperity.

        I think we’re talking about two different things here, because abstractions like “China” or “North Korea” are not fundamentally real, in that they are somewhat flawed models, but they are a sometimes useful simplification and shortcut of the real world to give us an overview.

        But, I was talking about freedom from the perspective of individuals. If specific individuals in the federal government end the laws that maintain the embargo on non-black market trading, then the specific individuals in Cuba who become at least slightly less economically desperate are more free, even though still having the boot on their neck for civil liberties and economic liberties.

        Think of freedom as having options. If the embargo ends, individual Cubans will tend to be a bit more prosperous, which gives them more options on how they can live.

      • db

        The way I see it, free(ish) trade with China did float a lot of boats, but because the CCP had and has control over just about everything there, it was the CCP and state connected industries that benefited the most. While our trade helped make a lot of poor people comfortable (yay us!) we also contributed to making the CCP and the Chinese state very rich, and set them up to be able to hold on to power much longer, and with greater ramifications globally.

        While we helped some measures of economic freedom at a low level, we inexcusably subsidized a very anti-liberty power that the world will not be easily rid of.

      • rhywun

        Yep, every dollar we send over there helps feed the CCP – it’s as simple as that.

        And look at all the great things they’re doing with it.

    • Winston's Mom

      I’m sure everything is merely coincidental. seasonality and climactic factors are the main driver but never underestimate the impact of the ruling class being dumber than dogshit.

    • Shpip

      Devil’s advocate for a moment (wait a sec… Winston’s Mom isn’t an advocate for the devil?) — Florida and Texas have a much warmer average climate.

      To further confound things, a good chunk of Florida’s initial outbreak was traced back to New Yorkers fleeing Cuomo’s asinine policies and traveling down to their winter homes. Early on in the panic, Ron DeSantis actually tried to make the St. Marys river into a moat, using the state Highway Patrol to stop all southbound traffic on I-95 and questioning drivers as to their destinations and intentions. It didn’t work, of course — just too much traffic to do that effectively.

      We’re used to NY/NJ residents moving down to southeast Florida and bringing their shitty policy preferences with them. In spring 2020, they brought the China Virus, too.

  20. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Freaky Friday: Dim Sumomorphs

    • SDF-7

      I hope someone served that at a Halloween party. Nightmare fuel otherwise.

      And I feel cheated. I expected Sumomorphs to be transmogrifying into beefy men in loin cloths….

    • rhywun

      I remember that movie.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Serious journalism, for serious people

    President-elect Joe Biden told Stephen Colbert he is “not concerned” about the investigation by federal prosecutors into his son Hunter Biden’s tax affairs.

    Biden told Colbert when questioned that he thinks the investigation is “foul play” being “used to get to me.” He appeared alongside his wife, Jill Biden, during The Late Show With Stephen Colbert that aired Thursday night.

    “We have great confidence in our son,” Biden said. “I am not concerned about any accusations that have been made against him.”

    ——-

    “People who want to make hay in Washington are going to try to use your adult son as a cudgel against you,” Colbert said. “In terms of your job as president, can you reach across the aisle to people who’ll be using this as an attack on you when it is such a personal attack because it’s about family?”

    Was Colbert wearing a bib while he licked Joe’s balls?

    • Rebel Scum

      President-elect Joe Biden told Stephen Colbert he is “not concerned” about the investigation by federal prosecutors into his son Hunter Biden’s tax affairs.

      Nor should he be. He has a ‘D’ next to his name, after all.

      use your adult son as a cudgel against you

      The Trump children could not be reached for comment.

    • Old Man With Candy

      I knew Tim. Very smart guy, did some excellent work. Rabidly racist* and homophobic, even by our decidedly non-Prog standards.

      *Not against Japanese, as anyone who knows his wife will attest.

      • Lord Humungus

        That South African background?

        My one local audio buddy – and rabid subjectivist – has an EAR 834P and the new Phono Box (which is just an updated version of the 834P!)

        On a side note I sent the ARC SP-8 off to get *fixed/checked by Audio Research. They wanted $500 to retube it with Russian-made EH junk!

        *yes I could have done it myself but resell time the documented ARC clean bill of health and new box will add some value.

      • Old Man With Candy

        Tim had an unfortunate tendency to spit when he talked. At an ETF meeting one year, he ranted at me about one of my designs. After the rant, as he walked away, Morgan Jones said, “See, you shouldn’t have done the biasing that way, now you have him spitting mad!”

    • SDF-7

      Ah, the California model! They’ll move to the net worth tax, exit tax and 10-years-after-leaving-tax soon enough, I’m sure.

    • rhywun

      And 1% of us them pay more than 50% of the taxes.

      TL;DR but nothing will change when those more-than-50% who don’t pay taxes have a vote. I guess I admire their optimism, though.

    • Nephilium

      But… SALES TAX!

      /pedant

      • robc

        Does NYC not have an occupational tax? We dont have one here in SC, but back in KY both Louisville and Bowling Green had one, and it was a flat tax on earnings if you worked within the city limits, so no deductions. So even low income workers were paying some local tax. Sales tax, on the other hand, was state only. KY does not allow local add on sales tax.

        The Louisville/Jefferson County tax was 2.2% if you lived in the County and 1.45% if you lived outside the County. The 0.75% difference was school tax. The city of Jeffersontown (also in Jefferson County) added on an additional 1%, which is why I avoided working there. I don’t remember BG numbers despite being there more recently, they were slightly higher, IIRC, I think 2.5%.

  22. Rebel Scum

    “Hunter Biden is the smartest man I know in pure intellectual capacity” – Joe Biden

    Hunter Biden, Drug Czar. I can’t wait for the cries of “nepotism” when Biden gives positions in the admin to family members. ///stoplaughing

    • SDF-7

      At least he will have had some experience this time — unlike Burisma.

  23. Lord Humungus

    On another depressing note I have a job interview next week. This is for a fairly large manufacturer, one with more money than my last gig. It’s one of those contract-to-hire positions but a nice bump in pay.

    Why depressing? I was looking to make LH version 3.0 by doing something completely different job-wise. Instead I’m going for the cash, doing LH 2.1 – same sphere of work just a different part of my knowledge.

    • Winston's Mom

      Good for you.

      We’ve all had to fall back on our skill sets in creative ways to make end meet this year.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        I shudder to think what falling back on your skill-sets means for you, Hermione.

    • Tundra

      Nothing’s forever. I’d take the money for a couple years – it’s looking like it might be a bumpy ride.

      You can always start work on 3.0 concurrently! Good luck!

    • Not Adahn

      LH version 3.0 by doing something completely different job-wise.

      There are really only so many different ways to make a kid. EF should have told you that.

  24. Tundra

    Good morning, Winston’s Mom!

    Thanks for the meaty lynx, as depressing as they are.

    Mandatory “Buy American” is stupid, but I’ll admit I’ve been paying more attention to country of origin. I mean, my shirts from Uruguay and shoes from VN seem fine.

    It’s anything electronic where things get challenging.

    I like the Dominion chick, too. I hope she has good security.

    We need a nice Friday song.

    Mmmm. Tasty.

    Have a great day, people!

      • Tundra

        Skol!

        Thanks, Q!

    • UnCivilServant

      I pay attention to country of origin, my main criteria is “not China”. I still have a preference for made in the usa, but it’s not mandatory.

      • WTF

        My main objection to Chinese products is that they are typically shitty quality.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    During the show, Jill Biden addressed for the first time publicly a recent op-ed that targeted her doctorate and use of the prefix “Dr.” in her name.

    The op-ed, published by The Wall Street Journal and written by former magazine editor Joseph Epstein, was decried as misogynistic by many for its tone and content.

    “That was such a surprise,” Jill Biden told Colbert, remarking on the biting tone of the piece. “You know, he called me ‘kiddo.’ One of the things that I’m most proud of is my doctorate. I mean I worked so hard for it.”

    Bless her heart.

    • Rebel Scum

      Since everyone is adding inaccurate/deceptive titles to their names, it’s Doctor President-elect Rebel Scum, Esquire to you!

      • Swiss Servator

        “His Excellency President for Life, Field Marshal Alhaji Dr. Idi Amin Dada, VC, DSO, MC, CBE”

      • Chipwooder

        You forgot the best part: Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Seas and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular

      • Rebel Scum

        And protector of the realm.

    • R C Dean

      One of the things that I’m most proud of is my doctorate. I mean I worked so hard for it.

      That’s just sad. I mean, if it were true. Which its not. Because she’s lying.

    • Not an Economist

      I mean I worked so hard for it

      It doesn’t show.

  26. juris imprudent

    Perhaps a Jefferson Project to answer the Lincoln Project?

    I’m a lifelong Democrat, but I cannot stand by a party that is increasingly controlled by the radical-left and supports policies such as the defunding of police and tax hikes on working families. That’s why I supported President Donald Trump, and that’s why I’m supporting Sens. David Perdue and Kelly Loeffler in the January 5th Georgia runoff elections.

    • robc

      Do the Dems still have the Jefferson/Jackson Dinner?

      • Chipwooder

        Pretty sure that got shitcanned, or at least renamed, a few years ago.

    • SDF-7

      I don’t know… none of them seem to be mopping the floor, so how on topic can they be? 😉

  27. Rebel Scum

    “Sex designations on birth certificates offer no clinical utility, and they can be harmful for intersex and transgender people,” the article, published Dec. 17, states. “Moving such designations below the line of demarcation wouldn’t compromise the birth certificate’s public health function but could avoid harm.”

    Leftism is going to destroy the practice of medicine.

    • Not Adahn

      Lysenkoism isn’t dead, it was just sleeping.

    • Q Continuum

      “Sex designations on birth certificates offer no clinical utility”

      Yeah, who gives a shit about fundamental genetic and anatomical differences. No clinical utility whatsoever. And probably racist.

    • juris imprudent

      Now I understand why I had to have OB/GYN coverage as part of my Obamacare health insurance. You never know when I might just need that!

      • UnCivilServant

        But the internet has insisted men can fall pregnant too!

        /avoidthoseplaces

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I just saw a commercial last night that contained the warning “this drug has not been tested in individuals assigned female at birth”. It’s a brave new world.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Ah yes, I’ve seen that particular HIV drug commercial as well.

        It would be less annoying if they had stated it as “this drug has not been tested in individuals with a double copy of the X chromosome”. But most people probably wouldn’t know what that means, so…..

      • WTF

        “Assigned”. As though it’s random.

      • ruodberht

        Well, sure, men can be hit by busses.

      • Rebel Scum

        And you’ll be GLAD you have it.

      • juris imprudent

        I wish you’d stop being so good to me boss.

  28. Pope Jimbo

    I saw the headline “Gazelka threatens Attorney General Ellison’s budget over bar and restaurant COVID enforcement” and I had hope. Then I read the story and realized the Minnesoda GOP is as feckless as always.

    All the GOP threatened to do is reduce Ellison’s budget by the amount of fines he levies against bars and restaurants for not complying with King Walz’s orders. It wasn’t a simple, “you have too much time and money on your hands so we will slash your budget in half”.

    Also this:

    Asked how to bridge such a divide, Gazelka suggested a course of action similar to what he’s been suggesting for much of the pandemic: No state rules, let local authorities decide.

    As for the restaurants defying Walz’s orders, Gazelka neither condemned nor endorsed them, but noted: “They feel that desperate.”

    When pressed on pictures and videos of packed and unmasked bar patrons singing, such as was done inside Alibi Drinkery in Lakeville, Gazelka did not approve.

    “I think it would be wise to follow CDC guidelines,” he said, referring to distancing and masking when you can. “If that’s what it takes to open up, then that’s what we have to do.”

    If there was ever a time for someone to say “Fuck off slavers!” that was it. But nope, keep conceding the basic premise that the Rona is sooper deadly and everyone needs to be sooper afraid.

    • Tundra

      What a useless pussy.

      Also the fucking AG is suing everyone who opened up. I hate this place.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I’m hoping that the suits against the bars will result in some judge finally asking the state exactly why they think they have this power. Or at the very least asking why the state is still under one man rule. It isn’t exactly an “emergency” anymore is it?

        If Wisconsin can tell their governor to fuck off, why can’t we?

      • Tundra

        Because our state is thoroughly corrupt and sick.

        And this is the kind of judges we have.

        Good plan. Put a single mother in jail for trying to feed her kids.

        This has to stop.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Why would a Ramsey County judge get that case?

        Because the hacks know that if it went to a local judge he might not rule the correct way?

  29. The Late P Brooks

    Now they’re talking about zombie companies. What tools are available to governments to decide who lives and who dies?

    I love it when so-called business and economics reporters make an implicit plea for central planning, right out of the gate.

    • Pope Jimbo

      If it was a zombie company, I think that the way to deal with it would be to go after the head and make sure the C-Suite is wiped out. Why do I think that won’t be the case?

  30. Q Continuum

    “I see sex as an activity to be ashamed of. I like sex with strangers as there’s no feeling of guilt or being judged but this causes problems, as I’m married[…]It doesn’t help that I’ve been a heavy smoker and drinker — but I just can’t get excited enough to get an erection with her. Or if I do, it’s so fleeting it’s no use.”

    https://www.thesun.co.uk/dear-deidre/13487284/can-only-get-off-from-forbidden-sex/

    You sound like a real catch.

    • Not Adahn

      I thought it was well known that an Englishman is incapable of orgasming unless someine involved with the process is being spanked.

  31. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    I pose this question to a larger audience (pace Potato!) I have the opportunity to work both sacred holidays when I could just work the “eves”. Company has treated me poorly for a very long time and because of the calendar I can call in for both Xmas Day and New Year’s Day. I think Imma gonna go for it. The Holidays mean nothing to me. Double time and a half. Does it set off your ethical radar at all? It’s a multinational so it’s not like “Pops” can’t afford tuition for his Grand-daughter next semester. Still feels off. Comments are open!

    • Not Adahn

      By offering extra money, they are incentivising you to work. Responding to incentives is rational.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Before I started my “career” I always worked holidays. Like you said, you got paid more and usually they were pretty easy days to work because no one else was around to disturb you. My first career job actually paid OT so I did a ton of extra work because it helped my wife and I so much.

      If you didn’t have any big plans for the Holidays, I definitely think you should cash in and work the shifts. I definitely don’t think you have any thing to feel bad about at all.

      The worst holiday to work was Mother’s Day. That was when I was in High School and worked at the local Holiday Inn which had a restaurant (which was “fancy” for that part of the Sticks). Mother’s Day was jam packed with a bunch of women who felt entitled as fuck, obnoxious kids and husbands who were grinding their teeth.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        Gah! Memories of the Country Club that I worked when I was 18/19! Ladies night was the worst. Old broads pinching your bottom and very bad tippers. They were friends of my parents for fuck’s sake. Don’t get me started on the pool parties…

      • Not Adahn

        Lol, Mother’s Day in the restuarant biz is amazing. Literally non-stop, you’d have to pre-plan your staffing changes by the clock instead of by the flow, becasue there was no change in flow.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      Not even a blip on my ethical radar. You should take the path that you prefer.

      • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

        I leaned that way before but I’ll take that and run with it! Thank You!

    • Broswater

      You guys still have Christmas? Grinch Legault stole it from us, the whole province is in ”red zone” now, whatever that means, and we’re not supposed to mix “bubbles”. Or mix more than 2, I don’t know and don’t care anymore.

      We were supposed to be hosting this year, but nah, neither my mom nor MIL want to take a chance (I don’t blame them, they both had health issues this year, I’m still pretty sure it has more to do with being scared into compliance by the MSM than by an actual risk.). We’ll just end up trying to do a family meeting over the internet like we did with Easter.

      The Holidays still mean something for me, and I’m kind of sad my job didn’t scheduled me on the 25th actually. I’d rather be at work than sitting at home ruminating on what should have been and being depress at how we allow ourselves to be ruled by arbitrary edicts from petty wannabe kings.

      Also, double time and a half as you said.

    • leon

      Not sure what the ethical Dillema is. Is it that they will be paying you too much? if they didn’t want that they shouldn’t have offered you to work those days. If it is not taking of Christmas, i see no problem with that.

    • Tres Cool

      “Cream, get the money. Dollah dollah bill ya’all.” -Wu-Tang Clan

    • R C Dean

      As a lawyer, I feel unqualified to offer ethical advice.

  32. Count Potato

    Trump should pardon Hillary Clinton.

  33. The Late P Brooks

    If it was a zombie company, I think that the way to deal with it would be to go after the head and make sure the C-Suite is wiped out. Why do I think that won’t be the case?

    One way to deal with zombie companies would be to allow risk-adjusted interest rates to rise to historical levels, making it ruinously expensive to keep the zombies tottering along forever, instead of chopping them up and moving those resources to more productive use.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      allow risk-adjusted interest rates to rise to historical levels

      That’s batshit fucking crazy talk. Why in God’s name would we reward savers and other non-debtors?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      What you did there, I see half of it.

    • juris imprudent

      One ping, and one ping only.

      • Chipwooder

        I would have liked to have seen Montana.

        Aside – looks like she’s worth those high prices.

    • Idle Hands

      “research”

    • Plisade

      She’s hot, but clearly not top notch. Clearly, he goes for the semipros.

    • pan fried wylie

      $25/min.

      Same as downtown.

    • creech

      Piss in the alley like normal people do.

    • Idle Hands

      Shit in the streets. I honestly don’t have any idea what I’d be capable of if health inspectors were coming in an writing me tickets and shutting me down from operating my business. Probably nothing but there’s a nonzero chance I would react badly.

    • Rebel Scum

      illegal guns

      I still don’t know what this means or why mayors are against them specifically.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Has anyone presented any evidence at all that it was Russians yet?

      • Count Potato

        CrowdStrike said so.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        That’s almost a guarantee it wasn’t Russians.

      • Not Adahn

        It was using techniques never seen before, which is a “hallmark” of a Rooskie operaiton.

    • Idle Hands

      Isn’t convenient all this is dumped in the week of the Chinese honeypot news? It’s almost like they have some kind of agenda.

      • Rebel Scum

        I would think they (media/Dems) wouldn’t hesitate to throw Swallowswell under the bus. I don’t see what good he is to them.

      • Not Adahn

        He makes their audience happy with his goodhate. Like that Grayson guy from FL. Equally stupid, but the righteous hatefulness more than makes up for it.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Pelosi needs his vote in order to remain Speaker. That is his current and only value.

      • Idle Hands

        it’s an incredibly narrow majority she has to play with.

  34. KOVIDKristen

    Normal dog routine: get out of bed ~noonish, poop, pee, have a refreshing beverage, go back to sleep in living room

    Last few days dog routine: wake up at 6am, diarrhea, and possibly vomit

    So I made a vet appointment for 8:30 this morning. Vet requested a stool sample.

    Guess which routine the dog chose?

    • KOVIDKristen

      * takes the hint *

      See some of you tonight.

  35. The Other Kevin

    Thanks everyone for your kind words on my article last night. I was questioning the formatting, and if people would be interested, and I was pleased by both of those things. This will be a series, but the first one was published faster than I thought, so the next one won’t be up for a few weeks.

    On that note, it seems we are short on articles again, so I encourage everyone to at least give it a try! Our community here seem to find just about anything to be interesting.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I took a look at your article TOK and I’m impressed!

      My drawing skillz are a close second to my handwriting skillz, which is to say it sucks balls.

      My only quibble is the subject matter. In the rare moments I think that I would like to so something artsy, it has always involved nude models. Skulls and bowls of fruit are for the normies! I expect suave Glibertarians to be painting nudes day and night.

      • The Other Kevin

        You won’t be disappointed by the next installment. It will be a nude, back view in order to keep our Family Friendly rating. I keep a sketch book, and kids under 18 aren’t allowed to look at it.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        It will be a nude, back view in order to keep our Family Friendly rating.

        Poor Q.

        I wasn’t around last night (like usual) but your painting was awesome!

      • The Other Kevin

        Hey, Q is just as much an ass man as any of us.

      • Not Adahn

        Did you artfully add a tramp stamp and some angel wings on her back?

      • The Other Kevin

        It’s not done yet, so I could…

      • Pope Jimbo

        I won’t be disappointed at all. Q, on the other hand, will be beyond consolation.

  36. juris imprudent

    Upside to the last election.

    The Deplorables, in Hillary Clinton’s infamous term, are working- and middle-class people who haven’t bought into the progressive agenda. They’re people who don’t see the rise of the tech oligarchy as a plus, who don’t think “woke” politics make sense, who have jobs that produce tangible outputs. They’re nearly half the country.

    • leon

      I’ve heard the “Not So Quiet Minority!” derisively thrown out in reference to them. I guess bein minority is something to deride if the Dems have power?

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      “Nearly half” ain’t enough.

      • prolefeed

        Bear in mind that even if you believe that all the ballots counted in the presidential election were real, less than half of the people actually living in this country voted. If you exclude kids under the voting age, I think it comes damn close to 50% still. If you exclude everyone who was not eligible to vote, not-voting still got a huge plurality over Trump or Harris/Biden.

        The “deplorables” ain’t just that one slice of the socioeconomic spectrum. It was roughly used to mean “everyone who didn’t vote for the Democrat or at least support what Team Blue says they’re doing.”

      • juris imprudent

        It is far more than the progressives represent.

  37. The Late P Brooks

    “! of every 200 Americans diagnosed with plague last week.”

    Scary blurt is scary.

    WTF does that even mean? Is that supposed to be a cumulative total, or the actual number for the week?

    Context is for chumps.

    • The Other Kevin

      Endorsed by Dr. Cosby.

    • Not Adahn

      What is “m” in that context?

      • Count Potato

        I’m guessing it’s minim.

  38. The Other Kevin

    Anyone watch BattleBots last night? To me it’s a great antidote to this crap year. Nothing but robots attempting to destroy each other, nerds talking about the robots, and one hot girl who pretends to be interested. There were some good fights last night, but about 3 that were terrible. They were still entertaining, it’s just that that the robots were not very good and the winner just got lucky. Those winners are going to get their robot asses handed to them in future fights.

    • Not Adahn

      Their shiny metal asses are going to get bitten?

      • Count Potato

        I’m guessing minim.

    • one true athena

      Massie’s kid at MIT is on the Uppercut team, btw. Which i don’t think is possible since he still looks college aged.

  39. leon

    Leon’s Thought of the day:

    “There is a benefit in having a mythos of heroes and stories of good men, seek them out for the universal principles that they teach”

  40. Drake

    how about create a more open and competitive market to undercut pricing on shitty Chinese goods.

    It is usually difficult to undercut pricing on goods made with slave labor.

  41. Tres Cool

    Festus’ Mustache’s tits keep calm and carry on. on December 18, 2020 at 7:33 am

    I made this funny before but Victoria Jackson is looking mighty fine for 61 years old.

    |Caroline Rhea always checked off nearly everything on my list

  42. Drake

    Speaking of a Chinese dick up our asses – Emerald Robinson sums it up pretty well.

    The US elections used Canadian voting machines with Venezuelan software to send our votes to Spanish shell companies with backup servers in Germany on network servers accessed by China & Iran – but our “intelligence community” needs more time to spot the foreign interference!

    • SDF-7

      Globalization BINGO! What do I win….

      • Drake

        A Biden Presidency.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    It is usually difficult to undercut pricing on goods made with slave labor.

    This is why we need TPP. So we can arm-twist the Chinamen into letting the AFL-CIO “help” their workers.

  44. Certified Public Asshat

    US Senate has NEVER convened a Congress on Sunday out of respect Not once in 231 yrs #realhistorychannel Constitution says Congress starts Jan 3 but can be moved by law. Senate Dems won’t agree 2change 2021 cong start date/usually done by unanimous consent WHY? Don’t kno— ChuckGrassley (@ChuckGrassley) December 17, 2020

    This man might have to work on a Sunday and he is not happy about it!

    • leon

      Meh. Keeping a Sabbath is part of most traditional christian denominations. Congress will change it’s dress standard to allow for one member to wear a head covering for her religious beliefs, but not for one that is held be a large portion of the country? The Dems are not about tolerance, but dominations, and if they see your culture as useful for that, they will support it. If not they will do everything to spite it.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I’ll be contrarian here and say religious observances should be kept out of government. This Sunday sabbath stuff has is how ended up with blue laws that close liquor stores and forbid hunting on Sunday that restrict millions of people who don’t share this belief.

        VA only got rid of the Sunday hunting ban a couple years ago. Many threw a tantrum about it. I have no sympathy.

      • leon

        I understand what you are saying. I don’t think it really pertains to the day congress decides to start working. They already have the power to change the start day by law if they want to. They aren’t prohibiting regular people from working on Sunday, they are just being respectful to the members who would like to not work on Sunday, the same courteousy that was extended by allowing head coverings in the chamber. I don’t see this as anything like a blue law.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        They shouldn’t get to make that call any any more than any other employee. Congress is supposed to work for us, and we don’t have a national religion. If an employee, whether a congressman or fast food worker, objects to working Sundays, then they should seek employment elsewhere where working Sunday is taboo (like Chik-fil-A). I also would like not to work on Sundays. But i’m paid to do a job and I’ve gone to work on Sundays when needed regardless of my preferences.

        It’s not a blue law, but it’s part of the same forced courtesy that gave rise to blue laws.

      • leon

        They shouldn’t get to make that call any any more than any other employee.

        1. They are empowerd to make that call. 2. CEO’s are employees, and still get to set their own hours to work too. 3. The idea that Congress works for anyone but themselves is a fiction.

        I don’t get how you say this is a “Forced Courtesy”. Not being able to buy liquor on sundays is a forced courtesy. Not being able to Hunt on Sunday is a forced courtesy. Congress picking to work on the weekdays is congress setting it’s on time to work. Regardless, the main point is that Congressional Democrats have no problem making changes to their rules to be courteous to the most minor of religious observances, but refuse to change the start date to spite the religious right in some way.

        Mind you i don’t feel slighted, i’m just making the point that Democrats do not care about diversity, they care about domination, and if your religion is useful for that then they will use and “support” it. If not they will spite you for no purpose.

      • R C Dean

        CEO’s are employees, and still get to set their own hours to work too

        Technically, an salaried employee can set their own hours. Technically, again, they can’t be required to work a set schedule or hours without asignificant risk of being reclassified as hourly.

        Congressional Democrats have no problem making changes to their rules to be courteous to the most minor of religious observances, but refuse to change the start date to spite the religious right in some way.

        That’s my take.

      • leon

        Technically, an salaried employee can set their own hours. Technically, again, they can’t be required to work a set schedule or hours without asignificant risk of being reclassified as hourly.

        Huh… Can you still require a minimum amount of time worked?

        Otherwise, i think i’ve worked plenty of jobs where i was “Salary” but still “Hourly” for accounting purposes, because i’ve always had to turn in a timecard.

      • R C Dean

        Can you still require a minimum amount of time worked?

        Its a complicated multi-factor test for tax purposes, but that would be a big strike.

        I turn in a timecard but it doesn’t track actual time worked (every week is 40 hours, regardless), its just an administrative requirement for our payroll system to work.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Uffda. I’ve never heard of no hunting on Sunday before.

        Shoot, even NoDak which used to have insane Blue Laws (even so far as to tape off large sections of convenience stores that contained non-essential products) didn’t try to stop a man from hunting on Sunday.

        Minnesoda finally allowed Sunday liquor sales a few years ago. We still won’t allow car lots to be open on Sunday though.

        I wonder if that was a law perpetuated by wives who didn’t want to have to poke around a car lot after Sunday services.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I’ve seen Fargo, I know what your Minniesoda car salesman can do. Better to avoid the debil on the Lord’s Day.

      • juris imprudent

        PA just allowed the first Sunday hunting this year.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I just think it is a poor read of the room, regardless of how sincere he is. They are working on how bad they plan to fuck everyone again (maybe you get a little check) and are such a loathsome group to begin with that I can not muster any sympathy.

        I assume the real reason it is January 3rd anyway is because someone didn’t read the calendar correctly, which is hilarious.

  45. The Other Kevin

    Just want you all to know, I’ve thought a lot about it, and while it would be an opportunity to help make a change, I have decided not to serve in the Biden administration.

    • leon

      Ooof. This will come as a blow to the Biden Admin, who is seeking to get a glib representative on his cabinet, to fulfil his goal of having a diverse cabinent that “looks like America”.

      Are there any people on Biden’s cabinent that didn’t work in Government or Politics before this appointment? That was just a regular factory worker? That would be something that “Looks like America”

      • Plisade

        “looks like”

        But isn’t. Wolves in sheeps’ clothing.

    • The Other Kevin

      He’s been in politics for 40 something years, so to him I’m sure all those swamp creatures look like the America he’s used to.

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      I really wanted this to be you!https://youtu.be/dDZzl9AyXeg

    • Pope Jimbo

      If you didn’t want a job in his administration, why did you send him your resume that had “CORN TOK” in big letters at the top?

      Admit it, you were trying to take advantage of that old man. You are just backing out now because that doctor he lives with caught on to your ruse.

      • The Other Kevin

        Admittedly, I haven’t been asked, which is another reason why I’m not taking the job.

  46. Not Adahn

    Two related bitchwhines:

    USPS. A package was mailed to me from The NYC area on the 10th. Tracking showed it got to Albany on the 15th, and sat there for 17 hours before getting a truck for delivery. Later that night they removed the “delivery by 9:00” from their tracking but did not utherwise update it. Yesterday they said they were going to deliver it, but it was just too dangerous. They did at least stage it closer to me.

    Fucking snowplow driver: The first winter here, mailbox destroyed. Moved it two feet away from the road, now it’s so far in my yard that the mail carrier literally drives onto the yard to deliver mail. All last winter it was fine. Yesterday, kerspoldie. Affixed the twisted metal back on top of the post, bent door into a shape that will remain on the front of it, hinges replaced with bolts.

    Now I’m imagining that the package will get delivered, and the plow will knock it into the street where it will be destroyed and a scrap will blow onto my driveway to mock me with what might have been.

    • leon

      Now I’m imagining that the package will get delivered, and the plow will knock it into the street where it will be destroyed and a scrap will blow onto my driveway to mock me with what might have been.

      At least it will be poetic.

    • SDF-7

      Hmmm…. sounds like it is sort of shaped like a bullet with butterfly wings now.

      • Tundra

        December 17, 2020
        In Transit, Arriving Late
        Your package will arrive later than expected, but is still on its way. It is currently in transit to the next facility.

        December 14, 2020, 5:20 pm
        Arrived at USPS Regional Origin Facility
        FAYETTEVILLE AR DISTRIBUTION CENTER

        December 14, 2020, 4:05 pm
        Accepted at USPS Origin Facility
        ROGERS, AR 72756

        Yeah? So where the fuck is it?

      • Gustave Lytton

        My experience with DHL:

        Thursday, December 17, 2020 Location Time Piece
        14 Forwarded for delivery PORTLAND, OR – USA 05:03
        1 Piece
        Monday, December 14, 2020 Location Time Piece
        13 Forwarded for delivery PORTLAND, OR – USA 19:30
        1 Piece
        Sunday, December 13, 2020 Location Time Piece
        12 Arrived at Delivery Facility in PORTLAND – USA 11:02

        Maybe today?

      • Not Adahn

        Lol. I ordered something from Gillingham’s in VT on Monday, it’s just been delivered.

        There’s no new snow, so if the plow comes by I’ll know it’s malice.

      • Timeloose

        I’ve got the same message from USPS. Mine indicates only that they received it in the local post office at the point of shipment. Without this parcel I will be unable to write my pinball machine bullet proofing article for Glibs.

        I have my bridge rectifiers, but I’m still waiting for my electrolytic caps and diodes.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Back in 2000 I wrote a web app for a packaging company in Minneapolis that yanked data from the USPS site and displayed it on the package customer’s account page.

      It was the beginning of e-commerce as a real force in Holiday sales and it was amazing how much money simply showing that tracking information saved our client. From customer service calls to a huge drop in returns (lots of people would just call and cancel/return when they didn’t know where there package was).

      And surprisingly the USPS api was surprisingly well done and easy to use.

      • leon

        A well done API is worth it’s weight in gold.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        How much does an API weigh?

      • pan fried wylie

        Print out the reference and put it on a scale.

  47. mrfamous

    “Finally, Krugabe says this isn’t 2008…”

    Oh shit, we are so fucked. his track record for being wrong is spotless.

    Anyhow, can any gearhead or electrician (or both) Glibs give me a somewhat easy/straightforward way to find and fix a short in my car’s electrical? It’s causing the heat door actuator in my dash to run constantly even with the ignition off and therefore causing it to fail and make clackety noises. I know how to replace the actuator, but I’m not gonna do that without fixing the short.

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      Nope. My mechanical skills fell off the wayside circa 2008. It’s all about replacing, not repairing now. Drive until they dive.

    • Plisade

      I had something like that with the AC in a Chevy. Found the problem in the dashboard dial switch itself. Just a shitty design that allowed carbon on the contacts to interfere with its being turned off. Easy fix but I had to solder a jumper wire in there that bypassed a separate AC power button. YMMV.

      • mrfamous

        Mine is a Chevy as well. 2009.

      • Plisade

        Mine was a Malibu, around 1999. The problem lay in there being a power switch separate from the temperature dial, with the temperature dial also having the ability to control the power when turned all the way counter clockwise. I cleaned the dial contacts only for the problem to come back mere months later. So I disabled the dial’s dual power capability with the jumper.

      • mrfamous

        This really sounds like my exact problem (Impala 2009). The actuator goes off if you move slide the temp dial up or down.

      • Plisade

        The hardest part was figuring out how to remove the climate module from the dash and opening it up without destroying things.

      • mrfamous

        It’s at 127,000 miles. Turning this into a major project probably isn’t worth it since, best as I can tell, battery life is about the only real problem long term other than noise (which can be fixed by unplugging the actuator).

        I might also be in a work position where a lease on new could be a great “value for money” decision.

  48. kinnath

    Seen of facebook:

    The Cleveland Indians baseball team is changing their name. They will become the Mistake-by-the-Lake Indians.

    • Nephilium

      Hey! I resemble that remark!

      Locally, a better gag would be to change it to Cleaveland Indians.

      The city name was shortened to fit a newspaper masthead, which is where Masthead Brewing got it’s name.

      • Nephilium

        /sees it’s instead of its

        /hangs head in shame

      • UnCivilServant

        Can someone explain where the possessive apostrophe went in that instance? I mean it’s an odd exception, what’s the story?

      • Gender Traitor

        No apostrophe in the possessive form “its” to distinguish it from the contraction form of “it is.”

  49. The Late P Brooks

    Hard hitting analysis

    As Kamala Harris prepares for the vice presidency, she is learning from a person who knows more about the job than almost anyone in the world: President-elect Joe Biden.
    Harris has told people close to her that she wants to shape her vice presidency after the way Biden worked with President Barack Obama over eight years: testing and pushing the administration in private, while in public remaining a dedicated and loyal lieutenant.
    Harris, in effect, wants to be Biden’s Biden and has spent the past several weeks playing a key role in the formation of the next administration, interviewing each eventual Cabinet nominee and spending considerable time talking to Biden about the process, sources said. She has also worked to get to know the President-elect by talking on the phone nearly every day, something Harris believes will help her better understand the kind of partner Biden wants her to be.

    ——-

    While she may not be the first vice president to play an active role in shaping a new government, Harris’ vantage point is particularly noteworthy. Not only will she be the first Black, first South Asian American and first female vice president in history, she also will be learning how to be vice president from someone who she believes did the job well.
    That dynamic was clear this week when Harris was asked on ABC what the “definition of success” would be when she looks back on her four years as vice president.
    “Joe Biden’s success,” Harris quickly said.

    I eagerly anticipate four years of sycophantic adulation for the brave and benevolent reformers of the Biden administration. They will remake this land into a paradise of love, respect, and understanding.

    • leon

      That dynamic was clear this week when Harris was asked on ABC what the “definition of success” would be when she looks back on her four years as vice president.
      “Joe Biden’s success,” Harris quickly said.

      I think she think’s Succession and Success are the same word

      • R C Dean

        Joe Biden’s success,

        Making millions of dollars through influence peddling to foreign governments?

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Didn’t she stand her ground on the believe all women stuff? She’ll also be the first VP (well maybe the second after Gore) to work for an individual she believes to be an attempted rapist so good for her.

    • juris imprudent

      We are saving America’s SOUL!

      STOP RESISTING!!!

    • robc

      Leeloo Dallas Multipass.

      I stand behind my claim as hottest sci-fi movie babe of all time.

      The only alternate claim I will entertain is Alice from Resident Evil, but that is still wrong.

      • Animal

        Too skinny.

      • robc

        Whatever, John.

      • db

        Yep. Totally the hottest.

    • Urthona

      It’s too bad she does such bad movies.

      • mrfamous

        I thought “A Perfect Getaway” was fun.

      • R C Dean

        They may be “bad”, but I think they are fun.

      • Nephilium

        And so little nudity.

      • robc

        She did that during her modeling days.

      • kinnath

        I’ve read that she “chooses” to be a B-movie actress.

        Fun work. Enough money. Relatively quiet life outside the Hollywood mainstream.

  50. Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

    Special thanks to Suthen for turning me on to this a few days ago – https://youtu.be/dDZzl9AyXeg It was a wormhole.

  51. Idle Hands

    https://twitter.com/mattyglesias/status/1339754173491982337

    Matt Yglesias stumbled upon a CDC white paper suggesting that if they just stuck over 65 with the vaccine they would save 5% more people’s lives but they aren’t doing that because the over 65 population isn’t diverse enough. We are a sick sick society.

    • Urthona

      Aren’t they gonna stick all the old people they can? Nursing homes are in the first round with health care workers and then they’re gonna try the rest of the elderly.

      • robc

        “Essential” workers outside health care are above the elderly.

    • Festus' Mustache's tits keep calm and carry on.

      Gah. Okay, I’m out. Godspeed you little varmints!

    • leon

      And their chart says that going that way is the less “Ethical” Solution, because “It promotes Health Inequities”

      These people are depraved. And they are the ones we are supposed to trust for our “health care”

      • Idle Hands

        I wouldn’t trust these people to pour me a drink.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        When you have only one metric…

      • R C Dean

        So its explicit now that a policy that kills white people is more ethical than having a policy that is race-neutral?

      • Idle Hands

        this is no way will end badly.

    • robc

      People actually trying to support this (but at least not for diversity reasons). They just try to throw stuff, that they are wrong on, hoping there is another legit reason so that this method can go forward. Sad.

      • Idle Hands

        In fairness it’s based on a model the CDC using so how correct could it even be?

      • robc

        The fatality rate by age data is pretty hard to screw up. At least the relative rates.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    Almost there

    Most Americans now accept the benefits of wearing masks and wearing them around others, a Kaiser Family Foundation (KFF) survey published Friday finds.
    As Covid-19 infections, hospitalizations and deaths surge nationwide, most Americans say they can keep up social distancing until the pandemic has eased or until there’s a vaccine — and most think they’ll need to. The KFF survey also finds that just over half of those polled think the worst of the pandemic is yet to come.
    And their fears may be justified.
    An ensemble forecast published by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention now projects there will be 357,000 to 391,000 coronavirus deaths in the US by January 9. Unlike some individual models, the CDC’s ensemble forecast only offers projections a few weeks into the future.

    ——-

    “The share of the public who say they are worried that they or someone in their family will get sick from coronavirus is at its highest point since KFF began tracking this question in February (68%),” the Foundation said in a statement.
    These fears may have motivated people to accept public health advice about wearing masks and staying away from other people. Asked how often they wear a protective mask when out of the house and in contact with other people, 96% of those polled said some, most or all of the time.

    The survey found 23% of those polled felt wearing a mask is a personal choice while 73% felt mask use “is part of everyone’s responsibility to protect the health of others.”
    “While an overwhelming majority of Democrats (93%) and a large majority of independents (70%) say wearing a mask is everyone’s responsibility to protect public health, Republicans are more divided on this issue with half (50%) saying it is everyone’s responsibility and a similar share saying it is a personal choice (45%),” the survey found.
    “Republican denialism mirroring President Trump, even in the face of a growing epidemic in red states, has become a real public health challenge that the incoming administration will need to take on,” Kaiser Family Foundation President and CEO Drew Altman said in a statement.

    We must not relent in our war on Republican Denialism!

    Punish the heretics. Grind them under your boots. Peace and justice and total obedience to the State must prevail.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      “ while 73% felt mask use “is part of everyone’s responsibility to protect the health of others.””

      That doesn’t preclude people thinking that mask wearing is also a personal choice of sorts. That’s not a good measurement item.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Also love the use of denialism: They’re just like Holocaust deniers.

    • R C Dean

      The cognitive dissonance of “we must keep wearing masks to stop infections” and “infections have been surging while everyone has been wearing masks” is, err, breathtaking.

    • Urthona

      Support for masks appears to be dropping which is interesting and surprising.

      • kbolino

        Everywhere I go indoors other than my house every single person is wearing a mask all the time and has been for 6+ months. About half the people wear them outdoors as well, and a few even wear them while driving. If they worked as well as we’re led to believe, we wouldn’t be going through a second wave of closings and travel restrictions in Maryland. Whatever good they might possibly do is I think completely undermined by the overuse of them and overreliance upon them.

        And all of this assumes that the goal should be to slow the spread, which as far as I can tell is turning into “drag this motherfucker out as long as possible, and maybe all the old people will die of something else first” but people are always getting older all the time, and thanks to everything going on, lots of people are getting unhealthier too.

    • grrizzly

      I’m pretty sure the survey didn’t have my opinion on wearing masks: you’re a moron if you wear a mask.

      The other day I answered a survey on travel. All the questions and answers assumed that everyone is scared shitless of the virus and desires as much compliance with the hygienic theater as possible. I had to choose “other” all the time and write in that any reluctance to travel I might have is caused by mask mandates and unpredictable restrictions.

    • Rebel Scum

      As Covid-19 infections, hospitalizations and deaths surge nationwide

      Those numbers are totally accurate. I mean, it is not like we are counting all death with convid as deaths of convid or treating every positive test as a “case” regardless of the existence of symptoms. That would be absurd.

  53. The Late P Brooks

    Dr. Fauci had a similar message for people in the US. Earlier this week, he said despite the vaccines, the public won’t be able to “throw the masks away” until the late fall or early winter of 2021.
    “It’s not going to be like turning a light switch on and off. It’s not going to be overnight. It’s going to be gradual, and I think we will know when we see the level of infection in the country at a dramatically lower level than it is right now that we can start gradually tiptoeing towards normality,” Dr. Fauci said during a Center for Strategic and International Studies virtual health event.
    “I don’t believe we’re going to be able to throw the masks away and forget about physical separation in congregate settings for a while, probably likely until we get into the late fall and early next winter, but I think we can do it,” he added.

    In another year, the feebleminded hypochondriacs among us will be so psychologically dependent on the masks, they will refuse to give them up for any reason.

    • R C Dean

      I asked somebody who said they were taking the vaccine to prevent any risk of infecting others how they squared that with Fauci saying the vaccine didn’t provide enough protection to allow people to stop wearing masks.

      I didn’t get an answer.

    • Rebel Scum

      probably likely until we get into the late fall and early next winter

      Next flu season where it will be extended again and again until 2030 and beyond.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Getting injected with a whittled down version of the virus you’ve already had makes perfect sense.

      • Animal

        Well, to be fair, the Pfizer and Moderna vaccines aren’t attenuated-virus products. They are mRNA vaccines.

  54. CPRM

    I’ve started writing the script for what appears to be the penultimate episode of THIS incarnation of Hat and Hair cartoons… I’ve got plans, I can’t let go of this grift quite yet.

    • leon

      The Sniffer and Swine?

      The Peado and Pig?

      The Corrupt Politician and the Corrupt Politican?

      • pan fried wylie

        The Corrupt Politician and the Corrupt Politican?

        C&C Politician Factory

      • pan fried wylie

        “EVERBODY XANG NOW *DAHN DAHN DAHN DAHN-DAHN-DAHN*”

  55. The Late P Brooks

    “Essential” workers outside health care are above the elderly.

    Congressional aides in their twenties?

  56. Lord Humungus

    LH thinking too much:

    I have a reservation for a new Ford Bronco, very base version with the 2.3L 4-pot and a 7-speed manual. But given the march of the Climate Change freaks through the corridors of power, and the number of “ban the combustion engine! by the year 20xx” brigade, would I even be able to drive this vehicle when I’m an old man? I can see a time where gasoline is highly taxed in order to ahem “nudge” people toward electric cars.

    And yes I’m instead considering a Tesla 3 but only as a lease.

    • R C Dean

      Yes, you’re overthinking. Get the damn Bronco. Live a little while you can. You’ll have plenty of time to drive electric vehicles.

      It’ll be a long time indeed before you can’t get gas, considering we will need to completely rebuild our electric infrastructure for an IC-free transportation fleet. Taxes might get stupid, but living your life to avoid every conceivable worst-case scenario, well, I’ll pass.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It’ll be a long time indeed before you can’t get gas

        Narrator: It was not a long time before the Harris administration began initiatives to remove gasoline from the market.

      • juris imprudent

        Do it! Push left as HARD AS YOU CAN you assholes. The backlash will be spectacular.

      • kbolino

        There will be civil disobedience, but I’m not so sure about political or cultural backlash. The Hays Code lasted for almost 40 years before the culture changed enough to get rid of it.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      I almost typed “at least you can drive the Tesla 3 sooner” but is that even true?

    • CPRM

      The new Bronco looks like they smashed a Jeep Renegade into a Land Rover and said, “That’ll do Pig”.

      • Lord Humungus

        eye of the beholder and all that but it actually looks pretty close to the original. I would prefer the old one but prices on those have skyrocketed.

      • CPRM

        Sure, if the original had been designed by a 3 year old with his Duplo Blocks.

      • BakedPenguin

        This one looks like a Mini on steroids. Some of the others I thought looked cool.

    • db

      how do you get the manual transmission? I can’t seem to find it.

      • db

        Oh, I see, it’s only available in the 2-door model

    • Tundra

      My opinion only: buy the Bronco. Fuck the greenies. If you think for a minute that their ‘ban all cars’ thing is gonna happen you’re dreaming.

      It’s nice to have a ‘look-back’ ride. Something that after you park it to go inside, you turn back to just dig how it looks.

      Bronco.

  57. The Late P Brooks

    Also:

    These fears may have motivated people to accept public health advice about wearing masks and staying away from other people. Asked how often they wear a protective mask when out of the house and in contact with other people, 96% of those polled said some, most or all of the time.

    I guess that means 4% said never.

    • ron73440

      So I guess I’m in the 4%.

    • Plisade

      “some” could be 0.001% of the time. /eye roll

    • Rebel Scum

      I am the 4%.

  58. ron73440

    I get to listen to Steve Harvey in the morning at the office, and today I heard a song, sung like a gospel song, repeating “Trump is gone” followed by a chorus of “Pence is gone’.

    I am really impressed with the amount of humor and originality that went into this song.

    • leon

      I was thinking Paul Harvey at first….

      • BakedPenguin

        ron hasn’t told you the rest of the story.

  59. R C Dean

    an opportunity for niche work. Except teachers unions, fuck them.

    This confuses me. I thought the work was fucking.

  60. The Late P Brooks

    I have a reservation for a new Ford Bronco

    You could probably find a real 289/4spd Bronco for less, even with the crazy prices they bring these days.

    • R C Dean

      Restomod vintage Broncos are pretty spendy. A lot of variation, depending on what has been done and how well, but they got fashionable a couple-three years ago.

  61. The Late P Brooks

    The cognitive dissonance of “we must keep wearing masks to stop infections” and “infections have been surging while everyone has been wearing masks” is, err, breathtaking.

    If you think the total lack of correlation between widespread mask usage and rates of infection is meaningful in any way, you hate SCIENCE!

    • R C Dean

      *mashes tinfoil hat on head*

      Nuh-uh!

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        Someone should sell tinfoil masks.

      • juris imprudent

        +5G stopped from infecting you with COVID!

    • mrfamous

      Read a story about the mass culling of cats during one particular plague during the middle ages. The cats were thought to be the cause of the plague and so they had to be dealt with. When the plague worsened, it was decided that some people were still hoarding cats and that’s why it wasn’t working, and so the remaining cats and the people who tried to protect them were also culled. The “more harder” approach.

      What actually happened was that the elimination of the cats caused the rodent population to thrive (the creatures who actually _were_ helping to spread the plague) and the plague outbreak worsened considerably.

      Thank god we would never engage in such silly behavior in our more enlightened times.

  62. The Late P Brooks

    Restomod vintage Broncos are pretty spendy.

    Yes they are, but what’s sticker on a new one? I doubt it’s less than $35k.

    • R C Dean

      Really spendy.

      Picked a shop at random. Holy shit.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        A rear locking diff is part of a five thousand dollar package? Fuck you Ford.

    • R C Dean

      Many variations, but its easy to get to and past $35K. Its hard to find any decent new vehicle these days for less than $35K.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Yup. Wife wants a minivan. $40k is the baseline for new. $25k if you don’t mind late model used.

      • Lord Humungus

        I remember the days – not that long ago – when $35k was BMW 3-series territory. Now it’s loaded Camry territory. Inflation blah blah.

        Same thing when a co-worker wanted to replace his 2001 Tahoe, a trailer towing vehicle that he used and abused for years. He couldn’t believe the prices on the new ones.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Cash4clunkers has had a lasting impact on the market. That and miniscule interest rates.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        We paid $30K for the base trim Honda Pilot back in 2011. Came standard with an integrated tow package which sealed the deal over the Highlander.

        In 2017, I believe we paid $23k for a mid-level trim Accord with the extra sensing features.

    • R C Dean

      *checks ammobot, haz disappoint*

    • Rebel Scum

      Honk honk.

  63. The Late P Brooks
  64. juris imprudent

    J’accuse!

    I take it that what this really means is that neither Switzerland or VietNam play along with OUR currency manipulation, therefore they are bad!

    • leon

      The U.S. Treasury is required to issue a semi-annual report in which it fingers so-called “currency manipulators.”

      Reminder, the U.S Treasury called China, who has a well known policy of pegging the Yuan to the Dollar as a “Currency Manipulator”.

      • R C Dean

        China isn’t the only one pegging its currency these days.

      • juris imprudent

        And just like that, it was perfectly on topic for a Winston’s Mom post.

    • ron73440

      Shouldn’t we be at the top of the list?

      #1

      USA USA USA!

      • kbolino

        Yeah, I was gonna say. The Federal Reserve’s job is to manipulate currency.

  65. The Late P Brooks

    I’ll be honest- Bronco mk I prices have exploded since the last time I looked. At that point you could get a really really clean late ’60s Bronco for 30k or so.

  66. The Late P Brooks

    And I thought that was nuts.

    • R C Dean

      Perhaps the most useful random comment for Glibs.

  67. The Late P Brooks

    Perhaps the most useful random comment for Glibs.

    Next to, “That’s what SHE said.”

    • leon

      If they didn’t want to be laid off, they should have thought about that before working in an industry the government would call unessential.

      • Idle Hands

        we should all work for the gov.

    • But Enough About My Pulsating, Geriatric Pecs

      12% of their staff’s getting laid? How does the other 88% get in on that deal?

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        They may not want it, given that its a night in the “pleasure room” with the Coca-Cola polar bear.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        They like to watch.