Monday Morning Links

by | Jan 4, 2021 | Daily Links | 532 comments

The 7-year old gets it!

Ah, what a wonderful weekend of sports.  And by “weekend”, I mostly mean Friday. And by sports, I mostly mean the CFP semifinal games. Alabama put the wood to Notre Dame, to nobody’s surprise. Although the Irish lost to them by less than aTm did. Although try telling that to an Aggie fan. And then came the nightcap…which was an absolute dismantling of Clemson by THE Ohio State Buckeyes. The 11th ranked team, according to one coach, demolished the Tigers in the Sugar Bowl.  I guess the six-game film wasn’t a quick study after all, was it?

Game over.

There were a bunch of exciting and consequential NFL games yesterday as well, as the Browns made the playoffs by beating the Steelers in a nail-biting finish. They’re rewarded by getting the same opponent next week, although they’ll play their starters then. Tennessee came back to beat Houston and lock up the 4-seed. The Redskins (don’t get me started on the name bullshit, they’re still the Redskins to me) held off Philly to make it in. And a bunch of other crazy shit happened on a furious last day off the season. Truly, it was a wonderful weekend of sports in America.

Big birthdays today were: fairy-tale editor Jacob Grimm, helper of the blind Louis Braille, shortstop Tommy Corcoran, football coaching legend Don Shula, heavyweight champ Floyd Patterson, rocker Bernard Sumner, musician Michael Stipe, comedian Dave Foley, and Liverpool soccer player James Milner.

That’s not a huge list. But it would have been overshadowed by the Ohio State beatdown of Clemson anyway.  And now on to…the links!

FREE THIS MAN!

Way to go United Kingdom! Now if Trump would just go ahead and pardon him, that would be great.

Pelosi barely wins race to be Speaker Of The House again. The moderate Dems say Amen (and Awoman, because of course they would) to that.

I love a (virtual) parade! Yeah, I’m sure the pandemic is the real reason.

I wonder how this will go down. My guess is: not well. Although it is really cold there right now, so the riots may be postponed until it gets warmer. Although structure fires can keep a crowd warm. So I could be wrong.

This should be rolled out nationwide. Although I’m curious how those professionals will handle the cops they ride along with.

Compliments of Chicago union teachers

There’s plenty of evidence out there that proves these people are full of shit. But pubsec unions gonna pubsec union.

Here’s a thought: If you don’t feel safe, don’t get on a plane. Problem solved!

I’m surprised it took them this long. In fact, I will be completely shocked if the government doesn’t do everything they can to kill or at least manipulate Bitcoin completely.

Here’s my theme for 2021. Hope it gets your year off to a good start.

Now go out there and have a great day, friends!

About The Author

sloopyinca

sloopyinca

532 Comments

  1. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Rep. Emanuel Cleaver, D-Mo., altered the traditional ending of “amen” by saying “Amen and awoman” as he delivered the opening prayer for the 117th Congress on Sunday — raising eyebrows.

    Illiterate retards don’t even know the Latin roots of the words they’re verbally sodomizing.

    • sloopyinca

      We’re in a post-Latin world. Language has deteriorated into a hybrid of hillbilly, valley girl, inner city slang, and various grunts.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Anything more would be pompous and faggy.

      • Tonio

        Mmmmph!

      • WTF

        “Your shit’s all ‘tarded and you talk like fag!”

      • AlexinCT

        It’s OK Scro… My wife is all retarded and shit and she is an airline pilot now…

      • Gdragon

        The underrated part is the look that Dr. Lexus gives as he explains how to handle/treat the diagnosis. I’ve seen it so many times and I don’t know if I will ever be able to avoid laughing at that scene.

    • Trigger Hippie

      My Congressman! I’m so proud!

      • CatchTheCarp

        Are other States congressional districts as oddly drawn as Missouri’s?

    • UnCivilServant

      Unsurprising. willful ignorance seems to be a prerequisite.

    • Festus

      Unless there is significant push-back against this nonsense we are all stuck on the planet with the Murder Aliens.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Everything is Marklar on Marklar.

      • Festus

        Marklar…

      • Trigger Hippie

        An old South Park episode

        The boys get whisked away to an alien planet where everybody is named Marklar and all descriptive words and terms are Marklar.

        It’s the only way to keep those Marklaring Marklars from Marklaring any further…Marklar.

      • Tonio

        Presumably snarking at ST:TOS “Darmok.”

      • robc

        Darmok is a great episode. The premise is ludicrous, but its still great.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        The premise is ludicrous

        To be fair, the entire premise of a universal translator that can understand languages of previously undiscovered species is ludicrous.

      • Tonio

        Ugh, mea culpa.

      • Festus

        Zat’s ze Joke.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Look, man.

        You can’t just go around expecting me to “get it” this early. 😉

      • Not Adahn

        akshally, descriptive Marklars are unchanged, unless they’re Marklars.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Somebody should ho to all this moon’s town halls and public appearances and at some point during each appearance yell out “hey, aren’t you the dumbass who said ‘awoman’ at the end of the prayer?”

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        *go, *moron

        *actually starts drinking the coffee in my hand*

      • mrfamous

        “Ho to all this moon” is actually an excellent turn of phrase, we just have to figure out what it means

      • zwak

        HO obviously refers to Kamala, and Moon is the SS codename for Biden, as an old term for Idjit.

        So, it refers to the secret Kamalala of America.

      • Agent Cooper

        “Ho to all this moon …” said the lonely astronaut, looking upon the vast expanse of grey rocky wasteland.

      • leon

        I kind of “My Kingdom for a horse” sentiment.

      • Mojeaux

        He’s an entrenched blue D in a thoroughly blue D county. Nobody’s going to challenge him.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Fucking ignorant bullshit mouthed to appeal to hordes of mouthbreathing morons. Stop the world, I wanna get off.

      • Festus

        “Womanhole ” covers on the streets and thoroughfares.

      • Trigger Hippie

        I really need to see a dentist about my womeningitis.

      • Agent Cooper

        Cobra Kai made fun of this in a recent episode.

      • Festus

        I never watch episodic TV but I might make an exception.

      • Chipwooder

        Cobra Kai is great

      • Agent Cooper

        Season 3 isn’t quite as good because they’ve had to keep upping the stakes. You kind of see how basing an entire show around teenage karate doesn’t have a lot of legs (pun intended?)

      • pan fried wylie

        My grasp of narrative terminology isn’t sufficient to tell you why I think you’re wrong. Where’s Mo or UCS when you need them.

      • Agent Cooper

        Some of the dramatic events felt a bit sillier and disconnected from reality to me. But overall I still appreciate the show.

      • pan fried wylie

        I’m just sayin, the grownups play a big role too. I can’t phrase it more technically though.

      • pan fried wylie

        I’m not smart enough to explain why I

      • pan fried wylie

        Derp, hit ‘post’ trying to hit ‘reply’ a 2nd time to get a fresh comment box, which isn’t even a thing… Feeling particularly brain dead today…

        So on one hand you’ve got the kids, who are in the middle of the whole High School Is The Most Important Moment Ever, on the other hand their parents, reconnecting with that period from their past, with that Most Important Ever bullshit and seeing how it wasn’t so important etc. And then everyone karates.

        There’s a lot goin on. Can’t wait till season 4.

      • Mojeaux

        My grasp of narrative terminology isn’t sufficient to tell you why I think you’re wrong. Where’s Mo or UCS when you need them.

        Stakes have to be upped each season to keep people interested if you don’t have a plot arc over several seasons. Just having Johnny and Daniel slowly work their way toward pal-dom isn’t going to cut it.

        This is a drama, not a sitcom, where every episode gets wrapped up. Soap operas can do this because they can change story arcs quickly.

        Cobra Kai‘s problem is that they didn’t really expect to get a 2nd season, much less a 3rd, so they’re having to scramble to come up with bigger stakes. But, knowing how popular they are, they can now expect to get more seasons, so they can be more careful about their story arc construction.

        Aside: This happens a lot, where a show doesn’t think it will be picked up for season 2, so they plan a one-season story arc that they wrap up with the slight chance they might get picked up. But then they have to scramble to do season 2 and often it’s not as good. The sophomore slump. Book authors have this too (*raises hand*).

      • Mojeaux

        Oh, also. I meant to say this:

        Once you get the two main characters together, it’s over. Boom, done. The kids can’t carry the show because the show isn’t about the kids. It’s about Johnny, Daniel, and Kreese.

        Johnny and Daniel had a couple of bonding moments in season 2. Carry those to their logical conclusions and it’s no longer interesting.

        Disclaimer: I have not yet seen season 3.

      • pan fried wylie

        Now I have to watch S3 a 3rd time with y’alls commentary in mind.

      • pan fried wylie

        or full series replay, rather.

      • CatchTheCarp

        Got a good chuckle reading the comments…..

    • AlexinCT

      The marxist don’t care about history, logic, or even language. Their purpose is to foment absolute confusion and to get you to admit there are 5 lights when there are just 4. It is about control and humiliation. You only know they own you when you have to play along with real evil/stupid/insane shit they say…

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        ^^ this.

        The only question is whether this idiot is a poor pathetic husk of a man long since lost to the torture or whether he’s one of the puppet masters trying to manipulate the populace. Since they’re not mutually exclusive, I’m going with “both”

      • Rufus the Monocled

        It’s not a coincidence that a tactic they advocate to get people to wear a mask and take the vaccine is public shaming.

        Hysteria leads to with hunts.

      • Festus

        Which hunts would those be? 🙂

      • Rufus the Monocled

        JFC the auto-spell is ridiculously illogical and sneaky.

        WITCH HUNTS. I specially typed ‘WITCH’.

      • Rebel Scum

        foment absolute confusion and to get you to admit there are 5 lights when there are just 4. It is about control and humiliation.

        Yup.

    • Ted S.

      Isn’t “amen” actually Hebrew?

    • Brawndo

      What we need is a constitutional awomandment

    • Not Adahn

      Holy shit, that’s real? I thought it was a Bee joke.

    • invisible finger

      A real marxist whould have said “Agender”. Or “Multigender” really.

      • Plisade

        Ax

    • Jarflax

      Latin roots? It’s Hebrew.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Latin… Hebrew… it’s all Greek to me.

  2. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Bitcoin link is broken, but I assume the Fed has taken measures to completely fuck it over. That was completely predictable.

    • AlexinCT

      The people with a plan don’t want some rubes to ruin their power ride when the shit they have been doing for decades implodes.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        The ship is going down, and the captain just made off with the only lifeboat.

    • Homple

      Governments are never going to give of control of money. It’s surprising that Bitcoin has lasted this long.

  3. Festus

    I’d chase “flag-girl” to hell and back but maybe that’s just me.

    • AlexinCT

      You plan to catch her? Cause if you don’t it looks like a lot of wasted exercise..

      • Festus

        Capture the Flag!

  4. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Biden’s inaugural parade is canceled and replaced with a virtual version to avoid drawing large crowds amid the pandemic

    The real question is whether they’ll cancel the inaugural balls and parties that get gazillions in “donations” from attendees. I doubt it.

    • Fourscore

      Dime a dance

    • hayeksplosives

      Pay to play is alive and well.

      The influence purchasers need to go through Biden’s Gatekeeper though, because Joe himself would forget who has purchased what favors from him.

      • hayeksplosives

        Has Hunter’s newfound love of painting sufficiently rehabilitated his image?

        Oh wait; his seedy side is unknown to more than half the population thanks to the media choosing simply not to report on it.

      • AlexinCT

        Virtual pay-to-play…. What COULD go wrong??

  5. robc

    Corcoran is 5th on the baseball birthday WAR list. But way to pick a mediocre 19th century player who I was also familiar with!

    Ted Lilly is #1, but Kris Bryant is at #2 after only 6 seasons, so will be moving up. He should be at #1 this time next year. And will be way, way ahead by the time he is through, assuming he can avoid injuries or getting old too fast.

    • Jerms

      I thought Bryant was going to be a stud. Looked great his rookie year and 2016. Really only had one decent year after that. I think his shoulder os still messed up.

      • robc

        Yeah, hard to judge 2020 of course, but 18 and 19 were down from his start. He will still lap the field for his birthdate if he plays another decade.

  6. The Late P Brooks

    What is needed, passenger rights advocates, flight attendant unions and academics say, is for the U.S. Department of Transportation to adopt uniform standards for airline safety, including a mask mandate that is enforced with steep fines. They also call on the federal agency to put more resources into contact tracing of known cases and improved access to quick and reliable COVID-19 tests that passengers can take before a flight.

    “Without health security rules by (the Transportation Department), air travel will continue to spread COVID,” said Paul Hudson, president of Flyersrights.org, an airline passenger rights group with more than 60,000 members.

    Fuck off you hypochondriac cunt.

    The mask is a placebo. Not for the wearer, but for the observer.

    • sloopyinca

      Paul Hudson, president of Flyersrights.org,

      The airlines should just bar this guy and anyone in that group from their flights.

      • grrizzly

        Why would the airlines bar him? He doesn’t propose anything that the airlines don’t want themselves.

    • Rebel Scum

      The mask is a placebo.

      I consider it more damaging to the wearer. One must constantly touch the face in order to adjust it, you are breathing moisture that is retained in the mask and making it more difficult to intake oxygen (while restricting release of co2).

  7. Trigger Hippie

    Looks like Chron nixed that Bitcoin article. Or my browser is just glitching out.

    • sloopyinca

      Son of a bitch. It was there, I swear. I’ll try to find another one.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Yeah, it was there. I got about twenty seconds into it then, poof!

      • sloopyinca

        I updated it. See how long it sticks around this time.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Working now:

        ‘Janet Yellen, who’s been nominated to serve as Treasury secretary in Biden’s administration, has in recent years cautioned investors over Bitcoin, saying it was a “highly speculative asset” and “not a stable store of value.”’

        “And were going to make damn sure to make it even more so unless we get our cut!”

      • AlexinCT

        YOU BITCHES WILL COMPLY WITH THE MONEY LORDS!

      • Gustave Lytton

        saying it was a “highly speculative asset” and “not a stable store of value.”’

        But enough about all fiat currencies…

  8. Tres Cool

    sup’ fam

    I missed the 2nd half of the game due to this pesky thing called ’employment’, but I did get to see Fields come back after that asshole tried to break his ribs.

    O-H…

    • robc

      Did the Bobcats win their bowl game?

      • sloopyinca

        He’s talking about the Buckeyes pushing Clemson’s shit in, I do believe.

      • robc

        I was mocking that OSU regularly celebrates THE OHIO UNIVERSITY. He wasnt going to add a S-T-A-T-E on to the end.

      • Agent Cooper

        ??? They most always add the STATE to the name.

    • sloopyinca

      I-O!!!

      The second verse was the same as the first. More pain for the Tigers.

      • Tres Cool

        Jugsy has been sentenced to spend some time in South Cackalaka for work, and I already warned her “don’t run your filthy whore mouth about that game. SEC fans are deranged.”

      • sloopyinca

        You mean ACC fans? You know, the conference that lost every bowl game they were in.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        (to be clear, in a system with 5 major conferences and a 6th semi-major conference, they have no business putting 2 teams from the same conference into a 4 team playoff)

      • juris imprudent

        They wouldn’t have if it had been any other team but ND. Then you would have had two SEC teams.

      • robc

        They actually won some out of conference games. 3 of the big 5 didnt win any, and the Big 12 spent September losing to the Sun Beast.

      • sloopyinca

        That win over The Citadel was quite the feat.

      • robc

        Better than the best B1G OOC victory in the regular season.

      • robc

        ACC fans? No one should be a fan of a conference.

        Real fans hate the other teams in their conference the most (with possible special exceptions, uga in my case). The ACC going 0-6 is awesome, since we weren’t in a bowl.

        Old sig of mine on scout, it almost got me banned from the Miss St board because I forgot I had it:

        “Conference homers are the lowest form of fandom…that is why the SEC has so many of them.”

        As an aside, the B1G is a close 2nd.

      • sloopyinca

        I don’t know any Big Ten fanbase that uses other teams success to glom onto and attempt to make their team look better. That’s an SEC move almost exclusively…hence the “S-E-C! S-E-C!” cheers you routinely hear at bowl games.*

        *I started that cheer in the 4th quarter of the 2014 season’s Sugar Bowl (right after Zeke had gone 85 yards through the heart of the south) in the Superdome and had some octogenarian female Bama fan turn around and yell “fuck all y’all” to the hundred or so of us Buckeyes doing it, as she attempted to climb over her seat to come after us…as the rest of the OSU fans in the stadium picked up on it and it filled the air in a beautiful scene of unbridled joy.

      • robc

        Yes, and that is why they are the worst. And the SEC chant in mockery predates you by eons. Any time an SEC leading team is going down to defeat it is done.

        With the B1G, it seems to be more of a basketball thing.

      • Not Adahn

        No one should be a fan of a conference.

        Big 8 forever!

      • sssbobbyr

        SWC to rule them all.

    • juris imprudent

      Clean hit, I hate the pussy-ass shit they call football now. Would’ve been pure shoulder to ribs if Fields hadn’t half-assed that spin move.

      • sloopyinca

        Even Skalski tweeted the next morning that it was a bad play.
        If he’s looking at the player instead of the turf, it doesn’t matter. This used to be called spearing and it’s been illegal for some time. He could have ended up like Hayward tackling like that. I don’t like the ejection aspect of it, but it’s definitely a penalty.

      • Agent Cooper

        Skalski could’ve ended up like Ryan Shazier, too. He needs to be careful.

      • Not Adahn

        Shazier

        Skalski

        Hassenpfeffer Incorporated?

      • pan fried wylie

        So, I don’t get it, did Laverne and Surely bottle rabbit-flavored softdrink?

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Rep. Emanuel Cleaver, D-Mo., altered the traditional ending of “amen” by saying “Amen and awoman” as he delivered the opening prayer for the 117th Congress on Sunday — raising eyebrows.

    He should have yelled, “Yahtzee!”

  10. Scruffy Nerfherder

    musician Michael Stipe

    *citation needed*

    • hayeksplosives

      That’s gonna leave a mark.

      • Tres Cool

        Anything after “Murmur” was essentially unlistenable to me, with part of “Monster” not necessarily vomit-inducing.

        However this collaboration with Neneh Cherry makes me want to stab my tympanic membranes with a knitting needle.

      • robc

        I made it to Green before I quit.

      • Chipwooder

        Shiny happy peeeeeeeople-

        *gunshots*

      • Agent Cooper

        Both Monster and New Adventures in Hi-Fi are quite good. Better than Out of Time or even most of Automatic for the People.

    • Festus

      I’m going to have to side with the Nerfherder on this one.

  11. Tundra

    Good morning, Sloopy!

    Thanks for the lynx.

    Assange deserves freedom. He’s a fucking hero.

    Excellent theme song. I hope it’s prophetic.

    I thought you might go this direction, given the birthdays.

    Happy Monday, people! Get those noses to the grindstone – your bloated government ain’t gonna pay for itself!

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Assange, Snowden, and Ulbricht won’t be pardoned by Trump who’s a conventional thinker on those issues. I hope he’ll prove me wrong but he won’t: He thinks Assange is basically a spy who got people killed, that Ulbricht is a wannabe hitman hirer and tax cheat who got caught, and that Snowden is a traitor, end of story.

      • hayeksplosives

        If Rand can persuade Trump that their pardons would explode the heads of many a Deep State operative, it just might happen.

        Especially if Rand can get Trump to believe it was Trump’s idea all along.

      • Tundra

        I guess Glenn Greewald was on Tucker the other night and made this exact pitch to Trump. I hope the dipshit finally listens to someone.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Trump throwing a bomb into the system on his way out is the only way it’s going to happen but, other than on Twitter, he’s also cautious so it’s unlikely. We’ll see I guess.

      • prolefeed

        but, other than on Twitter, he’s also cautious

        What’s he got to lose? Is he afraid he’ll be booted out of the presidency, and be hated by about half the populace, if he does those pardons?

      • Festus

        Nearly half of the State AGs want his head on a pike.

    • Festus

      +1 Thanks for the tasty links, Sloop.

    • sloopyinca

      Sumner deserves to have his stuff played daily. But I’ve had demands (and dewomands) made on me to not play so much New Order in the links, and I’m abiding.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    They should replace the inauguration with a Smurfs marathon.

    • hayeksplosives

      Yeah, nobody wants to see a Zoom call of Biden getting hero worshipped.

      Biden is a one-horse pony.

      • Agent Cooper

        “One pony trick” is the punchline to a joke as of unwritten.

    • pan fried wylie

      SNORKS OR GTFO!

  13. Nephilium

    Digging through two weeks of e-mails and chats at work… such fun.

    Of course, the NFL scheduled the Browns playoff game for the late night slot, meaning that local bars/restaurants can’t be open for the full game.

    • robc

      Cant or wont?

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Will, but very quietly as to not catch the attention of the revenuers.

      • Nephilium

        Currently forbidden by “emergency curfews”, under threat of losing their liquor license. The only variances given the last couple of late home games were to those who were going to the actual stadium. It doesn’t help that the state liquor board has their own enforcement arm now, and that they are slow rolling the hearings so there’s nothing to file in the real courts (one place got cited again, the story mentioned that they were also cited back in October, but that hearing hasn’t happened yet).

      • Swiss Servator

        “Can’t”

        God help the people that try to enforce it tho’

    • pan fried wylie

      you have to dig through chats…

      /gquit

  14. juris imprudent

    Sloop’s tune got my mind going on what suits Dabo’s mood today (and probably Ohio St after the championship game).

    • sloopyinca

      We’ll see next Monday night. We match up well except at d-back against Smith, who is absolutely amazing.
      It’ll be won on the line of scrimmage.

  15. Sean

    Since when is sneezing a symptom of the Kung Flu?

    • Tundra

      Since we’ve cured everything else, apparently. There is only one disease left.

    • Festus

      Because Karen said FYTW? I thought it was coughing and body aches. Guess I’ve had it for nearly a year.

    • Nephilium

      Since it needed to be.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Since the gov and media successfully created a nation of hypochondriacs.

      Coughing, sneezing, vomiting: Visibly ill people….

      Heaven forbid you accidently walk through some dust or allergens and cough and or sneeze….you apparently are truly exercising the devil out of you.

      Welcome back to the New Dark Ages.

    • Rebel Scum

      Everything is now a symptom of Kung Flu because SCIENCE!

  16. The Late P Brooks

    What will Inquisitor Harris threaten the British with, when she goes to fetch Assange for his crimes against Democracy?

    • hayeksplosives

      She will threaten to stay in Britain.

      Bonus will be her making the Brit talk show circuit so that her super annoying voice is inescapable until the UK submits.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Come to think of it, Britain has never been properly punished for giving us Piers Morgan.

      • Drake

        She’ll hit ’em with that laugh until they surrender.

      • Festus

        Yes

  17. The Late P Brooks

    Since when is sneezing a symptom of the Kung Flu?

    Is that a serious question? Hahahaha.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    ‘Janet Yellen, who’s been nominated to serve as Treasury secretary in Biden’s administration, has in recent years cautioned investors over Bitcoin, saying it was a “highly speculative asset” and “not a stable store of value.”’

    Unlike the dollar, which is totally sound.

      • dbleagle

        !964 quarters are fine. !965 is when silver left dimes and quarters and was reduced in half dollars. (1965-1970 halves were 40% silver- down from 90%)

      • UnCivilServant

        Silver is no more real money than the dollar.

      • R C Dean

        Back when I did a law school seminar on banking law, the only lecture I gave was on the history of money and banking. I proposed that money, in all forms, is merely a consensual hallucination.

        So, I would agree in principle. In practicality, though, I am betting on the very long history of specie being treated as valuable for exchange even when other mediums of exchange are not.

      • kinnath

        Silver is real.

        Dollars are fiction.

        I can’t tell you why small, standardized units of copper, silver, and gold have been used to facilitate trades for several millennia, but they have been.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        They’re both fictions, it’s just that one requires much more suspension of disbelief than the other.

      • kinnath

        You can make real things with real silver. It is not a fiction.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Yes, but the vast majority of the value of silver in the market isn’t due to those uses. I can use a $100 bill to wipe my ass, but nobody is gonna sell one to me for the 4 cents of toilet paper value it provides.

      • leon

        :pedant:

        the dollar is _more_ real money than silver, because the dollar is an actually generally accepted medium of exchange. Just because it is fiat doesn’t make it not money.

      • R C Dean

        I own specie as SHTF insurance against the day when the dollar is no longer a generally accepted/useful medium of exchange.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        ^^ this. Proper diversification includes physical precious metals, IMO. Maybe not much, but it hedges against a few risks.

      • R C Dean

        Currently, we have probably 3% of our net worth (including the home equity) in gold and silver coins. Maybe 4%, not counting home equity. I’d like it to be closer to 5% or so, but diverting the cash to buy up to that level hasn’t been practical given our current plan.

      • UnCivilServant

        All money is fiat money. Just because you can repurpose the materials it’s made out of doesn’t make it less declaratory. There’s just another mechanism for taking currency out of circulation when the mateiral it’s (im)printed on is more useful in another form.

      • R C Dean

        All money is fiat money a consensual hallucination.

        “Fiat money” actually has a technical definition – not backed by specie. Its a subcategory of “all money”. Money backed by specie is “representative money”.

  19. Rebel Scum

    Pelosi barely wins race to be Speaker Of The House again.

    The party of youth, diversity and SCIENCE! chooses a geriatric, white lady. Go figure.

    • Festus

      I’d laugh if she walked into a plate of glass.

      • Tres Cool

        I got a haircut yesterday, and despite my rugged good looks, I cant see myself in a mirror w/o hearing “baby head”.
        Canuckian asshole.

      • Festus

        You are very welcome, Friend.

      • Festus

        My admiration of you has grown, I0b0t. Grown immensely.

    • Trigger Hippie

      I eagerly await Speaker AOC in 2024/2026. It will be like having a methed out Rosie Perez as the second or third most powerful person in this country.

      The World is a cartoon.

      • Festus

        “I’m Rooozthie PEEEREZTH! SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME YOU STOOPIDS!” *hops on the dais and starts swinging the gavel menacingly”

    • juris imprudent

      YOU try to release her grip on power.

      • Tres Cool

        Know the difference between pink and purple? Your grip.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Welcome back to the New Dark Ages.

    How long will it be before we get a story about how some lunatic killed a total stranger for coughing or sneezing near him?

    • pan fried wylie

      Didn’t that woman already beat her children for sneezing?

  21. Rebel Scum

    Biden’s inaugural parade is canceled and replaced with a virtual version to avoid drawing large crowds amid the pandemic

    As if Hidin’ Biden has to “avoid” drawing crowds…

    • Tejicano

      Well, I would expect that there would have been a contingent of “Stop the Steal” in that parade – if not the lion’s share. Not that the media would let on that it was happening even if it was over 90% of those in attendance.

      • pan fried wylie

        “The motorcade is passing a clump of ‘Not My President’ protestors, obviously a reference to Trump’s illegal, Russian-backed presidency from ’16, great to see them out here supporting Biden today…”

  22. The Late P Brooks

    And, of course, when that happens, the media will report it with utter po’faced astonishment, , while not-so-subtly blaming the victim.

  23. Festus

    Marklar.

  24. Rufus the Monocled

    Awoman.

    This can’t sustain itself anymore.

    There has to be a factoring or war to settle this clash of values.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      It’s the kind of thing the Bee skips because it’s a bit too rich.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        The Bee is going to go out of business.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Prior to that this guy Tweets:

        “Waving hand Ben Requena #ChasingThankYou
        @BenRequena
        ·
        9h
        I just don’t get this line of attack. He obviously knows what amen means. It’s absurd to suggest he doesn’t and makes the pearl clutching more obvious.”

        In his account he has some mock Final Four bracket going and ‘Misinformation’ is in the FF.

        How is accepting ‘Awoman’ not misinformation? It’s more like blatant ignorance if not plain stupidity though.

        Like I said, this can’t go on.

    • Plinker762

      A-xer

  25. Rebel Scum

    Kenosha braces for unrest before ruling on Jacob Blake shooting

    So the cops are gong to do their jobs when riots break out? ///stoplaughing

  26. prolefeed

    My wife’s lesbian niece yesterday decided to boldly come out as non-binary, and to be henceforth referred to be a male name.

    Mrs. Prolefeed: “He needs a good counselor.”

    Me: “Why? And it’s ‘they’, not ‘he’.”

    Mrs. P: “It’s such a big change.”

    Me: “It’s a name change and a preferred pronoun change. Big deal.”

    Mrs. P: “It seems so weird to refer to (uses niece’s newly “dead name”) in the plural.”

    Me: ” ‘They’ is singular in this context. And it’s (not the “dead name”), it’s (newly announced name). Try to keep up. Remember how you’ve been giving me shite for misgendering and misnaming my youngest after she became he? Welcome to the next couple of years of payback for you.”

    pause to think

    “… and the really weird thing is that ten years ago, referring to a lesbian as “they” would have been triggering and offensive because you’d be some shitlord othering them as non-human. Now it’s the height of political correctness. But only if they insist on being othered. Otherwise it’s still offensive.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      My middle-school age niece is experimenting with that as well. The damned schools give so much time to gender identity that the girls are now using it as a social status signal. She’s vastly undereating to try to avoid the effects of puberty and I’m afraid it’s going to turn into full-blown anorexia.

      Meanwhile, the school ignores that they’ve got 12 year old girls trying to compete to be the least feminine and feeding them organic salads in the cafeteria which they wouldn’t eat anyway. So don’t think private schools are immune to this woke shit either.

      • Tundra

        The revolution is long over. The proggies won. They own academia, big biz, government and the media.

        Not much space left for us.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Awoman.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        I don’t think at least it’s that bad up here. Yet. We have this woke virus too but it hasn’t infiltrated the school curriculum but I’m seeing cracks.

        This is why the left goes hard after the institution of the family and God and Church. Break and breach those bonds of community and they have full access.

        Cue Zeppelin’s ‘When the Levee Breaks’.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        My middle-school age niece is experimenting with that as well.

        What do her parents think about it?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I think BIL is oblivious.

        My sister is concerned, but I don’t she recognizes the cliff that her daughter is playing next to. Anorexia is no joke and the only way to start getting her away from that danger is to remove her from that school and her upper middle class woke girl friends and put her daughter in an explicitly right-wing school that ignores the woke craze. Not likely, since my sister cannot reconcile her atheism with religious instruction.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Yeah, figures. The kids most harmed by this are the ones whose family members aren’t capable (for whatever reasons) of recognizing the rot and taking a stand against it. Frankly, they’re more at risk than the ones with abusive parents that go all in on this bullshit.

      • juris imprudent

        Here, she needs to read this.

        In American Awakening, Georgetown political theory dean Joshua Mitchell unmasks identity politics for what it is: a toxic outgrowth of Protestant Christianity that threatens the American regime of liberty and self-government. The book builds on popular critiques of wokeness by placing the phenomenon in the grander scheme of our post-1989 experiment in secular hyper-liberalism.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Interesting. Thanks.

      • pan fried wylie

        So don’t think private schools are immune to this woke shit either.

        *scratches head* Take, uh, your money elsewhere? What am I missing?

      • pan fried wylie

        My point just being, you’re not one of the peasants stuck in public school. You’re already shelling out extra tuition…spend it somewhere better? Or does that school not exist? (Has never, and will never, go shopping for Schools)

    • Festus

      I think that you need to find a way that your avatar’s big, fat ass sits on your niece/nephew’s face for about ten minutes.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Flyersrights

    You have the “right” to purchase a ticket at a mutually agreed upon rate. Or not.

  28. Festus

    I have to wonder how long Dr. Jill can keep her hand up poor old Joe’s fundament? I mean, she herself must be getting on in years. Arthritis is not some folly when you reach a certain age.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It won’t be her, it’ll be the people around him. Keep him hidden and let some of the most ruthless people on the face of the planet tell him what EOs to sign, all given cover by COVID. We’re fucked…

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        ?

      • prolefeed

        If someone had told me a couple years ago that a senile person on the verge of Weekends at Bernies would knowingly be elected president by Democrats, I would have thought they were delusional.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        He’s a dream come true for them in this unique time. They can manipulate him for two years doing god knows what while keeping him sheltered to stop the spread and the compliant press won’t stay shit. Then after two years they shed him for Harris, a nutter who shouldn’t be in charge of a fast food restaurant, to begin her ten year rule.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        OMWC was right all along.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        And that’s why Pence should not recognize the vote.

        The GOP needs to recognize. ‘Awoman’ is the essence of the DNC and Harris is its god.

        To me, I’ve read enough to conclude they stole the election.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Regardless, Pence cannot fail to recognize the vote. His role is ministerial only.

        Cotton had it right. It’s not just this election. It’s setting a precedent that the Dems will use in the future to say “Our guy won the popular vote, so the electoral votes are invalid”.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I won’t say it was stolen but the appearance of impropriety needs to be meaningfully and openly investigated before the result is certified. At this point, if Trump makes any meaningful moves he’ll either be frogmarched to Gitmo or we’ll have a civil war so I suspect the 6th will be a lot of sound and fury signifying nothing.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        I think this is worth fighting for to the end.

        You can’t let this shit stand. The chain of custody, the refusal to let observers in, the irregularities….

        On Nov. 3 Trump was clearly in the lead and then MAGIC.

        America lets this stand, it’s in banana republic territory.

      • straffinrun

        The US can’t count votes. That’s only lesson that really needs learnin’. Maybe the US never could.

    • sloopyinca

      She’s a doctor, man. She’s got this.

  29. Rebel Scum

    The Chicago Teachers Union said Sunday that many of its members who are expected back Monday are telling their principals they won’t return and will continue to work remotely.

    “Do your job or you’re fired” should be the response. I think you can open schools and take reasonable measures to protect older teachers who might be susceptible. Children, on the other hand, need to be spreading convid like wildfire so they are immune. And they need to stop the social physical distancing horseshit and wearing masks or they will grow up with compromised immune systems*.

    *which might be the goal for certain ngo’s…

    • Rufus the Monocled

      What we’re doing to kids is pure evil.

      • Chipwooder

        Yep. I can’t properly express just how furious I am with our county school system.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      And they’re going to say: Let it spread? AND KILL GRANNY? There is NO IMMUNITY!

      Not to mention they’re already saying the vaccine won’t necessarily work to stop the spread.

      • Akira

        Not to mention they’re already saying the vaccine won’t necessarily work to stop the spread.

        With all the goalpost moving that has occurred during this whole thing, I probably wouldn’t bat an eye if someone told me that the endgame is to herd undesirables into FEMA camps for “medical monitoring” where they will all die of gunshot wounds (cause of death: COVID).

    • sloopyinca

      DC teachers are pulling the same shit. I wonder if Trump can go PATCO on them since DC is under federal jurisdiction.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      My daughter’s school has been open since October. There have been four cases. Three were staff members who passed it among each other. One was a student (unrelated to the teacher cases) who went back to virtual classroom for two weeks.

      Public sector unions should not exist. This is cruel to the children affected.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Don’t even need to fire them per se. Not showing up to work when scheduled is job abandonment. Just terminate their employment.

  30. prolefeed

    The House of Representatives has narrowly reelected Nancy Pelosi as speaker with 216 votes, giving the California Democrat a fourth – and likely final – term leading the House.

    Pelosi, 80, is the third speaker in the last 25 years to win with less than 218 votes, after former Republican Speakers Newt Gingrich and Paul Ryan. Five Democrats did not support Pelosi on the floor, and instead voted for alternative candidates or “present.”

    It would be hilarious if the three members of the House who are slated to become members of Biden’s staff reduce her support to 213 votes in the interim, and the Republicans, currently at 211 with two vacant likely Republican seats, get to 213 and nominate one of the 5 rebels to unseat Pelosi for a couple weeks, just for the lulz.

    • Festus

      Everything is a joke right now. Why not?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      All the gender-bending language crap in the House rules was an obvious ploy to try to win over the rebel votes.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      All the interesting political and social YouTubers will be flushed to the altmedia sites over the next couple of years and they’ll do fine there, at least until those sites get their IP registration pulled which will most certainly happen.

    • AlexinCT

      Your mistake is to see that and think comedy when so many will see it and either think the guy is right on or evil for making fun of them…. Not that THEY are fucking idiots and what they believe is simply insane…

    • Rufus the Monocled

      When will Americans MAKE THEMSELVES laugh again?

      Why does a Canadian have to make your jokes?

  31. The Late P Brooks

    Quibblers, assemble!

    Despite Trump’s talk of building up the military, some analysts say he’s overstating his efforts.

    “Obama in his first term spent more than [Trump] did,” says Larry Korb of the Center for American Progress. Obama spent $3.3 trillion on the military in his first term, Korb points out, compared with $2.9 trillion during Trump’s term.

    Moreover, Trump’s claim of a military that was lagging under Obama was not the case, Korb says. Back in the summer of 2016, retired Gen. David Petraeus and O’Hanlon wrote an opinion piece in the Wall Street Journal titled, “The Myth of a U.S. Military ‘Readiness’ Crisis,” saying there were areas of concern but no crisis.

    One retired senior officer who served under three presidents and who asked not to be identified because he still works in government says in the end Trump was someone who in the national security realm was chaotic and transactional, often tweeting policy changes.

    Such tweets announced that all troops would be withdrawn from Syria — a decision that angered both U.S. Special Forces on the ground and their Kurdish partners fighting the remnants of the Islamic State. In the end, Trump was convinced by military leaders to keep hundreds of troops to continue the fight — and protect oil fields.

    “No one could trust that what he said was true — the old ‘your word is your bond’ didn’t hold true with the president,” the retired officer adds.

    The Deep Bureaucracy blocked just about everything he wanted to do. That means he lied.

    Obama was better.

    • Plinker762

      The Center for American Progress is now a pro war organization?

      • juris imprudent

        If Trump is against war, then we must be for it!

    • l0b0t

      I would not object to a good Stalinist purge of the military at this point. Every single active duty person above 0-2 should be retired (if willing) or keelhauled and dumped at sea (if unwilling to immediately retire).

    • Rebel Scum

      Something that has seemed odd to me is that Biden constantly ends statements with “God Bless our Troops”. It seems out of context.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    “It’s hard to see how the February 2020 agreement with the Taliban would have come about without Trump’s drive to get out, not to detract from [U.S. negotiator] Ambassador Zalmay Khalilzad’s diplomatic skills,” says Malkasian, the former Pentagon official.

    Korb, of the Center for American Progress, said removing U.S. troops from Afghanistan made sense — but not the way it was handled by the administration.

    Trump ordered reductions in U.S. troop levels from 4,500 to 2,500, even though military officials wanted to maintain that higher number into 2021. Military officials privately acknowledged that the Taliban had failed to meet the conditions called for in the agreement, but it appeared Trump was intent on maintaining a campaign pledge to bring the troops home.

    He did it based on an intent to follow through on what he had promised? Obama never would have done that.

  33. Rebel Scum

    The Dec. 14 incident illustrates the deficiencies in the systems that are meant to prevent people from bringing the coronavirus aboard commercial flights and potentially spreading it to the people packed in around them.

    I thought the cloth shame muzzles prevented spreading convid.

    • prolefeed

      shame muzzles

      I’m gonna steal the heck out of that phrase. Way better than “face diapers”, since echoes the “cone o’ shame” for dogs.

      • Festus

        Daughter #1 has been calling them that for over a month.

    • Agent Cooper

      “incident”

      I notice the extreme lack of plurality.

  34. Rufus the Monocled

    What is the dumbest thing woke ignoramuses ever uttered?

    Peoplekind.

    Or.

    Awoman.

    VOTE!

    • Juvenile Bluster

      Awoman. At least “peoplekind” makes some sort of sense.

      • Plinker762

        Carbonbasedunitkind

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Herstory?

      • robc

        Awomen is worse, but herstory gives it a run.

      • AlexinCT

        MANSPLAINER!

    • straffinrun

      Let’s hope Biden tries to get hep to all this new stuff. “C’mon Woman”.

      • Festus

        I’m crossing my fingers for “Bitch, please!’

    • Festus

      Nope. It was “Woke”! I saw it coming and cringed at the thought but even then I could see the utterly distasteful perfection of the term. It was the iceberg to the Titanic. Such a stupid term that it could not be argued with.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I would never appropriate AAVE grammar.

      • prolefeed

        With the bonus that, in Texas, a good chunk of the woke crowd listen to Asleep at the Wheel.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Awomen in what you have presented hands-down. The word itself has nothing to do with gender, has no meaning in gender, and the idiots that inhabit the various states in the United States will all lap it up.

      • straffinrun

        I’m assuming the Awomen thing was some kind of lame woke joke.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I think assumption is correct but the average education level of my fellow citizens (minus all you folks) will all nod their heads thinking they are taking power back from those men.

      • straffinrun

        Probably some dummies out there that’ll take it as sticking it to the man. Don’t wanna go all Hyperbole on you guys, but how important is it in the grand scheme? We’re gonna have some real shit to be screaming about real soon. *Not that we haven’t for years.

      • Not Adahn

        Prayer/invocations are not the time/place for lame jokes.

        If you don’t have enough reverence/respect to perform the ceremony, you shouldn’t be doing it.

      • straffinrun

        Let them inadvertently make a mockery of it. White pill a lot of people that way.

      • db

        Are we sure it isn’t a plug for the Defense of Marriage Act?

    • mock-star

      Amen and Awomen?!?

      How dare that bigot other the nongendered/pangendered/two spirits?!? That kind of hate and bigotry has no place in America.

  35. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Holy shit is this cringe (Alaska Air Safety Dance COVID commercial):

    https://youtu.be/b9w_paUjzKs

    Fuck off.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      We’re all toddlers now.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Comments and ratings not allowed, I’m surprised they didn’t pull the vid.

    • Rebel Scum

      Cringe af.

      Remember, children. The human immune system ceased to exist in March of 2020.

    • Agent Cooper

      Comments are turned off for this video.

    • Rufus the Monocled

      I swear I hope someone is collecting all this and plans to hand it over to the aliens in an effort to help them purge the right people.

    • Festus

      “We can dance! We can dance! Everybody Shit in their Pants!”

      • AlexinCT

        That doesn’t sound like any kind of safety dance….

  36. Q Continuum

    Once upon a time the internet was invented with the express purpose of filling it with tits. Mammary Monday pays homage to that great tradition.

    https://archive.li/0DplR

    • prolefeed

      #40, though #38 reminds me of a crazy (as it turns out, not crazy in a good way) French-Vietnamese GF I used to have.

      • OBJ FRANKELSON

        So, more on the stabby side and less on the choke me during sex?

  37. Rebel Scum

    When you are burned on language by Larry the Cable Guy…

    Congress today did a prayer and finished it with “amen” AND “a woman” to be gender equal. Are they really that dumb. Amen is Latin/Hebrew for “Truly” or “So be it”? It has nothing to do with Gender. These people are complete idiots. Ex: “God is great.” “Amen” (truly) duh!

    • Festus

      They don’t care.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      “Are they really that dumb.”
      No but they think we are and they’re right.

    • Not Adahn

      Just wait until someone says “Inshiya” and there is ritoing and hate crime prosecutions.

      (I’ll let Derpy and or any other Arabic speakers correct my interent translating (genderswapping?))

      • prolefeed

        Or anyone capable of googling “feminine form of Allah”:

        “Inshal-ilat” or “Inshallat”

        You might want to be wary of using this word around fundy Muslims.

      • Not Adahn

        See, my googling “feminine form of allah” returned “hiya,”

      • pan fried wylie

        FEMININE form of Allah?!

        That’s a beheading right there, buddy. At the very least a defenestrating.

  38. straffinrun

    Geez, guys. You’re gonna blow all your snark fuses. Pace yourselves because it’s gonna ramp up come the 20th.

    • db

      Political rifts? ISWTDT

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The artist, Juliana Notori, “said the scarlet hillside vulva was intended to ‘question the relationship between nature and culture in our phallocentric and anthropocentric western society’ and provoke debate over the ‘problematisation of gender.’” Brazil’s alarmingly right-wing government, and its supporters, seem to be provoked.

      Give them control and we’ll all be living in caves.

      • Chipwooder

        “problematization”…..oh fuck you

      • Not Adahn

        A society that isn’t anthropocentric isn’t a society at all.

        Of course it’s possible that either the arteest was trying to say androcentric, or that it was mistranslated from Portugese, or the journalismist doesn’t know the difference between andro- and anthro-

      • Tejicano

        I’d wager that the journalismist doesn’t know the difference between xer’s ass and a hole in the ground.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I wouldn’t discount the possibility that the artist thinks human rights should be extended to monkeys et al.

      • AlexinCT

        They want to show you giant pussy and then not put out? Fucking cock teasers…

      • Agent Cooper

        Scarlett Hillside Vulva is my stage name.

    • Q Continuum

      Looks more like an oozing wound.

      • Not Adahn

        It’s that’s time of the eon.

      • AlexinCT

        My grandpa used to tell me to never trust something that bled for 5 days a month but didn’t die….

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Pity your grandfather didn’t have sex ed in his day; he would have learned that that was his first meal.

      • Ownbestenemy

        ^^ Why this place is great…who thinks of that?

      • AlexinCT

        Earning his red wings?

    • pistoffnick

      *Throws hotdog down the hallway*

    • R.J.

      I followed the link. Really does not look like a vagina as much as an internal hemorrhoid that ruptured.

    • pan fried wylie

      Way to anthropomorph that hillside.

  39. db

    I read Straff’s post about drinking in a parking lot, and the bit about the alligator on the shirt reminded me of a story from my youth:

    It was School Picture Day at my Catholic elementary school, and my Mom had forgotten about it until that morning (oddly enough, as she was a teacher at the same school). As we were racing to get ready, she told me I had to wear “something nice” for the picture. For normal people, this wouldn’t have been a problem, but, being a student at a Catholic school and also terribly unfashionable, I had only two things to wear: officlal school uniforms and whatever grubby clothes I wore after school, which were totally unpresentable.

    I grew up in deepest Steelers Country, but my family (with the exception of my grandmother) didn’t care for sports much at all, and so I had never really been exposed to sports fandom, and didn’t really understand it (still don’t, much).

    My Mom scrambled about, and finally came up with something that I had never worn before, in fact, never knew I even had it–it was a hand-me-down from my cousin, a white turtleneck with a logo on the left breast. I had no idea what the logo was, I just figured it was some sort of fashion logo and put the shirt on, happy to have the shirt problem solved so I could get on with a productive day of learning and being a good student.

    I first realized something was wrong when I got to school and took my jacket off, and immediately was on the receiving end of a bunch of shit flung my way by half the people in my class. They good naturedly ribbed me about the shirt, which sported an inch-and-a-half embroidered logo of the Cincinnati Bengals. Throughout the day I took so much shit that I really didn’t understand, and it pretty much ran off me like water off a duck’s back, but my Mom remembered, even decades later, the day where nearly everyone, including the school picture photographer, had to get a piece of me for wearing a Bengals shirt.

    • straffinrun

      You looked like a pre pubescent Sam Wyche.

  40. Q Continuum

    אָמֵן, – Hebrew: “so it is”

    Used to express emphasis or, in the case of those not saying the prayer, agreement. Basically, “I’m down with what was said”. It’s not just pandering, it’s absurdly stupid and ignorant pandering whose only appropriate response is mocking, humiliation and derision.

    • Not Adahn

      “Hiyau Akbar!”

    • Plinker762

      Will their new union require the company to go further woke?

    • Q Continuum

      Unions historically seem to act as a slow-growing cancer that sucks the innovation, productivity and value out of an organization. For that reason I’m fully supportive.

      • Sensei

        Precisely. Also reap what you sow.

      • db

        Unions (and the complicity of management) took around seventy years to destroy the US steel making industry. Google has immense resources and spends profligately on nonessential things. It’ll be a very long time before that trough is exhausted. But eventually, it probably will be.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Steel is much more capital intensive than most everything that Google does. I think the market will leave them behind much more quickly than it did US steel and friends.

    • juris imprudent

      Can’t wait to see them show up at an AFL-CIO meeting.

      • Swiss Servator

        SEIU is more their bag.

      • Gustave Lytton

        See above. CWA is already making their move.

  41. The Other Kevin

    Good morning Glibs! I’m back to work after almost 2 weeks off. Besides having to scale back holiday festivities, I had a great time, played some hockey, and even painted. I hope you all had some time off and it was well spent, even if you didn’t do anything major.

    • beer league keeper

      Are rinks open in your area, or are the ponds frozen?

  42. Juvenile Bluster

    FAO Rufus: With the snowbirds not being down here this winter, I’ve never felt safer driving here.

    Are Quebecois always the worst drivers in the world, or do they just become that when they go to Florida?

    • Chipwooder

      Can’t be any worse than the elderly Manitobans who used to clog up Yuma’s streets in the winter by driving around slowly in massive RVs.

    • Chipwooder

      Guy sounds like a dick, buuuuuut can we please see the end of these “Here’s what a bunch of Twitter addicts thought about something” alleged news stories.

      • Sensei

        But if we do that we won’t be distracted from what the politicians are doing to us.

    • Ownbestenemy

      First rule STOP PUTTING SHIT FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE! Okay, I feel better.

      Reminds me of this (NSFW language)

    • pan fried wylie

      “My daughter’s a retard, I’m such a great parent!”

      wtf?

      • UnCivilServant

        Those two are not mutually exclusive.

        However, it appears the failure in parenting was not simply telling the kid how the can opener is properly operated, and instead crowing about the scene on the internet like a moron.

        At nine, I know I was already versed in how to work a can opener, along with a raft of other culinary basics.

      • pan fried wylie

        People on here were hunting their meals at 9, so I wasn’t going to brag about making ricearoni at that age.

        Where was this dick and his teaching moment like, 3-4 years ago?

    • AlexinCT

      Bitch please….

      I have no fucking sympathy for anyone other than your husband…

    • Creosote Achilles

      Hypergamy’s a helluva drug.

  43. The Other Kevin

    Bernard Sumner is a national treasure. Even though he’s not from here.

  44. Not Adahn

    Cleaver is an ordained United Methodist pastor

    The UMC has joined many other demoniations as a woke social club that sometimes pretends to be Christian. Perhaps they should all reunify since they now have the same doctrin. They could renaime themselves Doctrinally Neutral Christianity and their symbol could be a donkey with rose and sunrise livery.

  45. leon

    You people talk a lot.

    I’m going to throw this grenade in:

    Ohio State shouldn’t have been in the playoffs. Not because they aren’t a good team, but because they didn’t meet the eligibility requirements for their own playoff game in the BIG 10

    • juris imprudent

      They sure as hell could’ve played Cincinnati in the week their last B1G game was supposed to happen. Props to BYU and Coastal Carolina!

      • leon

        Yup. The playoff committee and BIG 10 are having their cake and eating it too. I’m from the western states, so i’m a Pac 12 guy. No Pac 12 team deserved to be on the Playoff, because they sucked, but also because they didn’t play a full schedule. If Ohio couldn’t make the requirements, bending and ignoring rules for them is egregious.

        I would be interested if some other schools in BIG 10 sued them over it.

      • Not Adahn

        The purpose of the conferences is maximizing income. If the playoff rules interfere with that purpose, then they need to be ignored.

      • leon

        Then the conference championship should always just be the two teams that would generate the most money.

      • Not Adahn

        I see you helped set up the WNBA!

      • Agent Cooper

        The CFP did not have a number of games rule. The Big Ten did. The Big Ten all got together and changed the rule. You can hate that, but it’s not like Michigan State is going to sue when they agreed to the rule change. (I don’t know what the vote was.)

        Ohio State lost 3 games from its schedule. It was responsible for cancelling the Illinois game. The other two (Maryland, Michigan) were cancelled by their opponents. Maryland did not technically meet the Big Ten threshold for cancellation.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Frankly, they should’ve gone back to the old bowl system for a year.

      • Agent Cooper

        They sure as hell could’ve played Cincinnati in the week their last B1G game

        The Big Ten did not allow for out-of-conference scheduling this season.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        There was a big kerfuffle at Nebraska because of that.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Baffling

    Across the U.S., this year has taken a heavy toll. The coronavirus has upended daily life and resulted in the deaths of over 300,000 people; 2020 is on track to be the “deadliest year in U.S. history,” according to The Associated Press, with a projected rise of 15% in total deaths from 2019. The pandemic’s economic impact has left hundreds of thousands of people out of work, struggling to provide for themselves and their families. Other stresses and pressures related to lockdowns and prolonged periods of isolation have also carried significant burdens.

    And for many, COVID-19 hasn’t been the only life-altering hurdle to face.

    This year, many Americans have experienced significantly higher levels of violence both wrought on and within their communities. Gun violence and gun crime has, in particular, risen drastically, with over 19,000 people killed in shootings and firearm-related incidents in 2020. That’s the highest death toll in over 20 years, according to data from the Gun Violence Archive (GVA), an online site that collects gun violence data, and the Britannia Group’s non-partisan site procon.org.

    This total includes victims of homicides and unintentional deaths but does not include gun suicides. And despite there being no “large-scale” shootings in 2020, the number of mass shootings—which are classified as an incident in which four or more people are shot and injured or killed—has actually risen, drastically, to over 600, the most in the past 5 years and a nearly 50% increase in 2019’s total.

    People have been tormented and tortured by their government, until the stress has reached unbearable levels. What the fuck did they think would happen?

    Also:

    ” a projected rise of 15% in total deaths from 2019″

    “Projected”

    Meaning pulled out of somebody’s ass, based on a model. What are the odds that model carries forward all categories of death based on historical projections, despite the obvious shift of death from other causes into the plague spike?

    Flu deaths are close to nonexistent, but that won’t have any effect on overall total mortality. Will it?

    • Q Continuum

      Just laying the groundwork for the 2A sodomization the Pre-Harris administration has lined up.

      And of course flu deaths are nonexistent: when you automatically classify any death from a respiratory ailment as ‘Rona without confirmation, flu deaths magically disappear.

    • Rebel Scum

      The coronavirus has upended daily life and resulted in the deaths of over 300,000 people

      No, the government upended daily life. And no, it has not killed that many people.

  47. The Late P Brooks

    They could renaime themselves Doctrinally Neutral Christianity and their symbol could be a donkey with rose and sunrise livery.

    Needz moar rainbow.

    • Not Adahn

      See, this is why I’m not in advertising or graphic design.

  48. Juvenile Bluster

    I just want this shit to be over. Like it or not, Biden is going to be inaugurated on January 20th. There’s absolutely nothing that can change that. I’m rooting for a divided government and will fight most of he does, and then what President Harris does, like Hell. But none of this crap about overturning the certified votes is going to go anywhere (nor should it) and is just a lot of noise we don’t need.

    • Drake

      I disagree – it should never stop. Every time either of them show their faces in public people should be screaming “fraud!” at the top of their lungs.

      There is no pretending that we have a functional government any longer.

      • juris imprudent

        So it’s just temper tantrums from here on out? What constructive thing can be done?

      • Drake

        Other than hanging everyone involved?

      • juris imprudent

        You going to hang the governor and SOS of GA? I mean, certainly you don’t want to bother with a trial or anything.

      • Drake

        No worries – we’ll just vote harder next time and pretend we still have a country.

      • juris imprudent

        Same as it’s ever been.

    • AlexinCT

      Yeah, the problem is that if we accept this result, we might as well stop voting cause it won’t matter again. They will make sure one of them wins every election going forward.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        we might as well stop voting cause it won’t matter again

        Well…

      • db

        “One of them” has been winning every election for a very long time now. There’s functionally little difference between the parties. I know this is old news, but it never hurts to remind people that the petty squabbles between the major parties are mostly for show and to keep the voters invested in the show.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        There’s functionally little difference between the parties.

        Meh. I’m not gonna defend the GOP as “good” by any objective standard, but only one party has aided and abetted the woke bullshit, championed the gun grabber movement, continually attempted to make abortion fashionable, and tried to destroy any dissent against TMITE and the public education industry.

        They’re both bad, but one is substantially worse than the other.

      • Drake

        The problem with the GOP isn’t their stated positions, it’s how fast they are willing to abandon them and their voters for a little payola. They talk a great game until it’s time to “compromise” and concede.

      • db

        Yeah, this. The GOP just uses its faux opposition to the dems to maintain a base. They never really deliver.

      • R C Dean

        The last spending bill made this crystal clear.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        ?

      • AlexinCT

        The GOP is unreliable and a bunch of cucks. The democrats are evil. That’s the distinction for me. If I had the chance I would woodchipper all of them, but when given the choice between the guy that will just turn his back on me and let others kick my ass in the prison yard and the ones that will actually sell my ass to others, I guess the choice, for me at least, is simpler: I will take the beatings over the ass fuckings.

      • AlexinCT

        And note that I don’t think that the orange guy is GOP. Trump remains an old style democrat. I absolutely dislike the spending shit he still is for. I think he is a pompous asshole. The man is deeply flawed and I can see why he annoys many (which is a plus in my book, cause fuck all of the rest). But he is not part of the machine that has been selling us out to the CCP and cares very little that we will all end up slaves to them (they are OK with it because every province the CCP runs will need its mandarin class, and they expect to keep that). That’s why I want to fight.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        ^This. The election made it clear that both the GOP and the Dems are just two faces of the same swamp party. The establishment GOP circled the wagons around Biden. It even appears that GOP gov Kemp and SOS Rafflenberg facilitated the fraud for Biden.

        I think some states will be able to weather the banana republic fallout better than others. But I have no illusion anymore that there’s a difference between parties at the Federal level. The GOP will roll on the 2nd A and anything else the second it becomes advantageous to do so.

      • l0b0t

        If only there had been someone in the early days of this national experiment who could have warned us of the dangers of factional (party) politics?

      • juris imprudent

        You mean like Madison and Hamilton – who each represented opposing factions?

      • Tejicano

        It seems to me that most (R)-party candidates/office-holders would have been (D)-party but there was already somebody else with more backing in that slot where they came from. They are no more an “opponent” than merely somebody playing Devil’s advocate to further the socialist cause. They believe the democrat’s position is basically correct but have to take a different view since that’s the only position left for them to play.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I don’t think it’s even that principled. The vast majority of politicians are motivated by non-political reasons and will happily don whatever suit they need to so they can get elected/gain power/make money/get laid. It’s why yellow dog Democrats persisted for over a hundred years or why once a state tilts like California, it stays tilted.

      • juris imprudent

        Well said db, there really isn’t that much difference between the one who wants to do bad (the rotten cop) and the other who looks on and does nothing (the rest of cops).

        The rhetoric versus the reality – and man, do we ever love whoever has the biggest mouth (Trump’s biggest appeal).

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        there really isn’t that much difference between the one who wants to do bad (the rotten cop) and the other who looks on and does nothing (the rest of cops)

        Sure there is. One’s evil. The other is a coward.

        Evil people cause shifts in politics. Cowards are just dead weight.

        It’s not team stupid v. team evil. It’s team coward v. team evil. You give power to an evil person and they’ll advance the cause of evil. You give power to a coward, and they’ll manipulate the status in a way that is least risky and most advantageous to them personally.

      • juris imprudent

        A choice between stupid, coward, and evil – who the fuck made up these teams?

      • pan fried wylie

        Cowardly evil morons.

    • Tejicano

      I recently identified the feeling I am having over the upcoming coronation of the pre-Harris administration as the way I feel instinctually when I prepare for a hard landing while riding in a malfunctioning aircraft. (I’ve done this a few times)

      • Ownbestenemy

        That puckered are ya?

      • But Enough About My "Essential Retiree" Status

        Same feeling I had when I realized The Hair That Walks Like A Man™ stood a chance of being elected (and later re-elected). My butt was clenched so tight you coulda opened a bottle of Pepsi with it.

        “When the U.S. sneezes, Canada catches a cold.”

      • Gustave Lytton

        Relax your muscles and let the lube do its job?

      • AlexinCT

        Is that cause nobody in his right mind jumps out of a perfectly good flying aircraft, and those that have to jump out need to be motivated properly? My DI used his boot.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        “I don’t know what is going to happen, but I’m sure as hell not gonna shit myself on the way down.”

      • Swiss Servator

        Unless you had the beans and franks MRE – “Not for preflight use”

  49. leon

    Having people like Yellen go after Bitcoin, to me, signals there fear of any threat to their monopoly, and how far they are going to go.

    I put the ods at 2:1 that we see negative interest rates here in the US in the next 8 years.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The conclusion is already baked in thanks to the bipartisan efforts of the last 20 years.

      I’m seriously pondering how to extricate myself and my family from the impending fiscal doom.

      • robodruid

        Scruffy:
        You ever listen to “the Survival Podcast” (Jack Spirco)?
        First step move out of the city.
        check out episode 2793

  50. Drake

    Two moments of silence please.

    Midge (from That 70’s Show) has passed away.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Damnit 2020 2021!

    • The Other Kevin

      A View to a Kill was the first Bond movie I saw at the theater. 🙁

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Noooooooo!

      Beastmaster and Sheena, Queen of the Jungle were staples of my teen masturbatory years.

      • Plinker762

        Aboobies

  51. The Late P Brooks

    And RACISM!

    Much of this violence has most significantly impacted poor Black and brown communities, exacerbating disparities already apparent in historical patterns. (Within inner-city minority communities that deal with high levels of gun violence, it’s not uncommon for there to be multiple shooting victims at one particular incident.) According to Everytown for Gun Safety, a non-profit organization that advocates for stricter gun laws, Black Americans make up 68% of homicide victims in larger cities, many of them victims of gun violence.

    “Poor people of color are suffering disproportionately from COVID, suffering from excessive and deadly force from police and suffering from excessively high rates of violence. Those are all concentrated on the very same population,” Thomas Abt, the Director of the National Commission on COVID-19 and Criminal Justice (NCCCJ) tells TIME.

    Everytown says it?

    That’s good enough for me.

    • leon

      1. Hijack legitimate protests against Police Brutality
      2. make it all about race
      3. Riot and loot in minority communities
      4. Watch crime stats go up
      5.

      Much of this violence has most significantly impacted poor Black and brown communities

      6. Advocate for Gun Control

      In short: ALWAYS. BE. ON. MESSAGE.

    • Not Adahn

      Obviously, the Federal Government needs a program to subsidize gun purchases by whites until the homicide rate increases enough to match.

    • Rebel Scum

      PPoC’s should stop killing each other in droves.

    • juris imprudent

      communities that deal with high levels of gun violence

      Deal? I thought it was perpetrated (and perpetuated) in those communities?

  52. Festus

    Big salad two nights in a row. Here’s hoping for the jet- propelled custodian again today. Man, I was fartin’ up a storm but got the job done in a jiffy! Eating right has it’s own rewards.

  53. The Late P Brooks

    I’m starting to feel like a rat in a bad high school science fair experiment. The sort of thing purely concocted as an exercise in animal cruelty draped in a thin cloak of SCIENCE-tific quest for knowledge.

    “Let’s pack all these rats in the rat habitat, and then randomly shock them and squirt diluted ammonia on them, and feed some of them but not others, and then shock them when they tap the food dispenser bar.

    “You know, just fuck with them mercilessly and see what happens.”

    • The Other Kevin

      I remember an incident in my high school psychology class. The teacher was excitedly describing one of those experiments, and when she looked up we all had a look of shock on our faces. We were all appalled at the “fucking with them mercilessly”.

      • db

        That day when you realize that monsters do exist and they are in charge of you.

      • The Other Kevin

        I think we in Gen X were some of the last ones to realize this. It was a lot harder to propagandize back then, without the Internet.

        The funny thing is, the teacher was a young woman, kind of nerdy and mild-mannered.

      • Festus

        Hawt!

  54. The Late P Brooks

    PPoC’s should stop killing each other in droves.

    Stop being such a racist, you racist!

    • UnCivilServant

      Clearly the solution is to BAN DROVES!

      • pan fried wylie

        I don’t even own a drove.

  55. Not Adahn

    If you hated the finales of The Prisoner or Neon Genesis Evangelion,/em> you wll probably hate the last two episodes of Mr. Robot. Still a brilliant series.

    • kinnath

      I am about 5 episodes into the first season.

    • UnCivilServant

      Avoid the show. Got it.

      • Not Adahn

        Or stop after the third to last episode and say “and they all lived happily ever after. Except the ones who are dead.”

      • UnCivilServant

        My strategy is easier, it involves continuing what I’m doing now – absolutely nothing at all.

      • Not Adahn

        Yes, but you will decrease your lifeime consumption of High Wierdness. Now, if that’s not to your liking, then you should definitely avoid the show.

      • UnCivilServant

        I don’t know what you mean by “High Weirdness” but from the name, it does not sound like my genre.

      • Not Adahn

        The main character is an unmedicated psychotic with DID who hacks people and organizations that piss him off. Hilarity ensues. A lot of people die. There are whiffs of Breaking Bad and a soupcon of Pulp Fiction.

    • Juvenile Bluster

      The last two episodes of Evangelion are like they are because the studio ran out of money and just had to slap together whatever they did.

      (still better than that scene from the End of Evangelion…)

      • Not Adahn

        That’s why they were executed in the way they were, but every redo of the series uses the same concepts.

        I’m not saying I disliked them (nor the finale of The Prisoner) just that “ending the series on a ‘higher concept’ than was present previously” is a thing that pisses a good number of people off. I am not one of them.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        Instead of Kare Kano I thought you said Koi Kaze which is completely different and I was wondering how one could get from Evangelion to … that.

      • UnCivilServant

        *looks between Sensei and JB*

        I hate it when I wanter into one of these culture discussions. I need a guide.

      • Sensei

        Hideaki Anno directed Evangelion and his next anime was based on a shoujo (teenage girl) manga.

        Interesting transposition.

      • UnCivilServant

        That would be quite the thematic whiplash.

      • Sensei

        I watched the first two episodes of Koi Kaze and realized what was going to happen and stopped watching.

    • Agent Cooper

      The Prisoner (original) was awesome from start to finish.

  56. Rebel Scum

    I can’t wait for our dystopian future.

    To build back better in a way that advances justices in America. Indeed the pandemic has pulled back the curtain on and showing and even worsened the disparities in our society. We must pursue justice, economic justice, justice in health, racial justice, environmental and climate justice; the list goes on.

    For some reason I don’t think “justice” means what she thinks it means.

      • leon

        Always. Be. On. Message.

        If what the people want is Justice, make sure Justice means Socialism.

    • Q Continuum

      “The tragedy of black America is we gave up responsibility for our fate in the name of justice. I hate the word “justice” because it’s a drug. It makes you feel that there’s such a thing as justice. If you really look at the human condition [laughter] this is a very rare phenomenon. Maybe it’s going to be there, maybe it’s not, but you better not count on it. You better focus on what’s in front of you and what you need to get ahead, what can get your family ahead and so forth.”

      https://quillette.com/2020/11/19/victimhood-or-development/

    • creech

      Like “freedom,” the word “justice” has been corrupted. As has “greed,” “jealous,” “gender,” and any number of other words that had one meaning a hundred or fifty years ago and seem to mean anything today.

  57. The Late P Brooks

    More from the geniuses at TIME:

    em>According to Patrick Sharkey, professor of sociology and public affairs at Princeton, 75 of the 100 largest cities in the country saw an increase in fatal shootings in the first quarter of 2020. “All the sources of data tell us that, right from the start of 2020, it’s been a year with very high violence,” Sharkey tells TIME. “There has been a real increase since May, but there was change going on before that.”

    That sounds like a ham handed attempt to absolve the government from responsibility.

    “No, seriously, it were institutional racism what dunnit. Not the government actively destroying people’s lives and livelihoods.”

    • db

      See, what they don’t get is that institutional racism *does* exist, and it’s because of their policies.

  58. The Late P Brooks

    We must pursue justice, economic justice, justice in health, racial justice, environmental and climate justice; the list goes on.

    Doin’ right ain’t got no end.

  59. Juvenile Bluster

    As a securities lawyer I am absolutely stunned the government hasn’t gone after bitcoin yet. I’ve been expecting it for years.

    • R C Dean

      I think the IRS has taken the position that BitCoin is a currency, not a security. BitCoin profits are taxed as ordinary income, not capital gains.

      I think. Its been awhile since I looked.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I believe this is true.

        I also believe that it will not be true for much longer.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I’m sure it will continue to treated as income for the tax rate. And a security for regulatory purposes.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I know that. But given trading markets it’s inevitable that they’re going to find it to be a security. The SEC has already had their hands on ICOs for a couple of years, and they’re going to go after the major cryptocurrencies next.

    • Rebel Scum

      honestly I’m a bit scared of such calculations. not that I doubt the numbers, but they may pave the path to say “now we’ve vaccinated the most vulnerable, let the virus spread!”

      Yes, that is how it should work. That is how you get herd immunity.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Not 2020 on. Herd immunity is a mythical thing that science had wrong for all these years and our new SCIENCE! has confirmed it. The only way to obtain immunity is through our SCIENCE! and anyone who says otherwise should be brought before the Court of SCIENCE! to be tried as a heretic upon the alter.

      • juris imprudent

        to be tried crucified as a heretic

        FTFY

      • Ownbestenemy

        Maybe rip out their hearts and set the cavity on fire?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I guarantee they’re not scared of calculations that suggest the government should lock down harder to stop the spread.

      • Agent Cooper

        With herd immunity, you can no longer control the herd.

    • l0b0t

      And HERE COME THE IDIOTS –


      Salem Barahmeh
      @Barahmeh
      ·
      Jan 2
      Israel vaccinating a million people is 1/3 of the story. Another 1/3 is it’s withholding the vaccine from 5 million Palestinians it occupies, which by int’l law its responsible for. Final 1/3 is vaccinations are given to Jewish-majority illegal settlements on that occupied land.

      • Juvenile Bluster

        I’ve been fighting those idiots all weekend:

        The Palestinian authorities haven’t asked for the vaccine from Israel. They asked the UN instead.

        They don’t have the infrastructure to handle the Pfizer vax anyways.

      • Ownbestenemy

        There was a lone person in that thread fighting that bullshit, but they will be drowned out or taken outback to be shot.

      • R C Dean

        One wonders how a vaccine that has serious logistical challenges is going to be distributed in backwards shitholes everywhere, definitely including “Palestine”.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Their logic is that Israel should distribute and administer to the people that say Israel is trying to kill.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Use another of the vaccines that doesn’t require as stringent refrigeration as the currently approved (in the US) pair.

      • l0b0t

        Is it true that one of the vaccines has to held at an absurdly low temperature, like -70°? At the ice cream works I toiled at for a while, the stupendously expensive blast freezer (to make the ice cream hard for shipping) only went to -40°. I can’t freezers with those capabilities are very common, particularly in the Levant.

      • R C Dean

        Pfizer has to be kept really cold until shortly before being administered.

        Moderna, I think, only needs pretty standard refrigeration.

        I’m sure there are some in the pipeline that are as easily handled as the flu vaccine, but those are in the pipeline. The usual suspects will rheee about the crapholes being denied vaccines until there is a vaccine they can actually handle, regardless.

      • Not Adahn

        Both of the mRNA vaccines require it for the same reason: mRNA is not a stable molecule.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Sinovac is already being distributed in Indonesia in advance of regulatory approval.

      • Not Adahn

        They’re not uncommon — I’ve worked at several labs that had -95 deg C freezers.

        And dry ice is available in grocery stores and it’s -80 iirc.

  60. Festus

    Huh. So after this particular election we get to continue our long-held tradition of pointing and laughing but we do it more quietly this time? Seems about right.

    • Festus

      Good Day, Friends! I’m done like dinner!

  61. Rebel Scum

    There will be no combined exercising of rights, subject citizen.

    As of this morning the carry ban is in effect, and will extend through this Thursday. It’s unclear at the moment just how much of the District city officials have decided to place off-limits to those exercising their right to carry, but Fox 5 in D.C. reports that similar signs have been posted throughout the downtown area. …

    As D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser proclaimed, “District law prohibits anyone from carrying a firearm within 1,000 feet of any First Amendment activity.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “District law prohibits anyone from carrying a firearm within 1,000 feet of any First Amendment activity.”

      Say what now? First Amendment rights and Second Amendment rights are exclusive to each other?

      • AlexinCT

        They told you so you fucking serf! Now put your mask on right!!

      • Agent Cooper

        First amendment activity is constant. This law is unconstitutional and should be challenged forthwith!

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yeah! But I guarantee the courts will say no one has standing.

      • creech

        If one is arrested for breaking this edict, then that person has standing to challenge it. At least in the America I knew.

      • leon

        Well i’m sure by the time it gets to the Supreme Court, the activity will be complete and so the question will be moot.

      • Ownbestenemy
      • Q Continuum

        As though the Constitution still holds sway over any laws anymore.

      • AlexinCT

        It would if the legal profession was not so populated with scumbags and cowards… The few Glib lawyers being the exception of course….

    • R C Dean

      “District law prohibits anyone from carrying a firearm within 1,000 feet of any First Amendment activity.”

      For values of “anyone” that exclude government employees, of course.

      • R C Dean

        I guarantee you the myriad armed government employees infesting DC aren’t subject to this “law”.

        Considering any communication is a “First Amendment activity”, this outlaws a serf carrying a firearm anywhere in DC. They could have gone with “10 feet” and it would have the same effect.

      • Ownbestenemy

        As Agent pointed out, all human activity is covered under the First Amendment really; walking with a friend, talking with a friend or even to yourself, saying a blessing, bitching about this stupid law…

        To the government’s eyes, only what they say and approve of is a “First Amendment activity” what ever that nonsense means.

    • Ownbestenemy

      “District law prohibits anyone from carrying a firearm within 1,000 feet of any First Amendment activity.”

      That is evil shrewd bullshit.

  62. DEG

    I had my boss reset my work password. Forgetting your work password is the sign of a good vacation, right?

    Despite ruling that Assange would be afforded a “fair trial” in the event of extradition to the United States, the judge considered that the “special administrative measures” Assange would most likely be held in would have a severe, negative impact on his mental health.

    I guess it all depends on how you define “fair trial”.

    “Two weeks ago, we passed an emergency relief package to crush the virus and put money in the pockets of workers and families, which is now the law.

    Seems legit.

    President-elect Joe Biden’s inauguration parade has been cancelled in favor of a virtual version designed to limit crowds during the coronavirus era.

    I tapped out and instead went to this article in the sidebar. Tundra signal lit.

    He said it’s a twofold program: In addition to transferring some emergency calls to trained mental health professionals, in cases where a police officer still needs to be dispatched to a scene, they will now be accompanied by a behavioral health professionals.

    This might actually be a smart thing.

    The Chicago Teachers Union said Sunday that many of its members who are expected back to school Monday will defy Chicago Public Schools plans and only teach remotely, as a majority of Chicago aldermen said in a letter to the mayor they are “deeply concerned” with the city’s reopening plans.

    Fire those teachers.

    What is needed, passenger rights advocates, flight attendant unions and academics say, is for the U.S. Department of Transportation to adopt uniform standards for airline safety, including a mask mandate that is enforced with steep fines. They also call on the federal agency to put more resources into contact tracing of known cases and improved access to quick and reliable COVID-19 tests that passengers can take before a flight.

    “What is needed”? Go fuck yourselves.

    Good music link.

    • Nephilium

      I just changed my work passwords the week before PTO. I still remembered them when I logged in this morning…

    • dontreadonme

      My ex lives in the area. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was involved.

      • AlexinCT

        Is she a cartel or Russian mob member?

    • UnCivilServant

      Usually sign of a revenge attack against a sex offender or philanderer.

  63. JG43

    This guy Cleaver didn’t just end the prayer with “Awoman”, he also ended with this: “… in the name of the monotheistic god Brahma and god known by many names by many different faiths …” I’m not even sure that is a Christian prayer.

    • leon

      I don’t often wade into the “You’re not Christian/you are Christian” debates, but if you aren’t willing to mention Christs name in your prayer for fear of offending someone, i don’t think you are being very Christian.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Like many things, the speaker pro temp or speaker or whoever is running the session should say here is your 1-min to yourselves to honor whatever you want and then get back to business.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Or just drop the whole thing. I highly doubt God enjoys being associated with that den of snakes.

      • Rufus the Monocled

        Will the meek ever inherit the earth?

    • creech

      When does Zardoz and the Flying Spaghetti Monster get their turns to be honored?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’m sure Charles Wesley would appreciate the Unitarian Universalist bent the Methodist Church has assumed.

    • Not Adahn

      I thought Brahma was part of a polytheistic religion?

  64. The Late P Brooks

    In addition to transferring some emergency calls to trained mental health professionals, in cases where a police officer still needs to be dispatched to a scene, they will now be accompanied by a behavioral health professionals.

    And whose ass, exactly, will those specially trained mental health experts be pulled out of?

    • leon

      I’m sure there are some mental health expert cops who are willing to put in some extra time doing some “training” that will get each cop in a department certified as a Mental Health Expert.

      • Not Adahn

        ^This

        The most complicated part of the process (other than distributing the graft properly) will be designing the certificates.

    • wdalasio

      I’m only okay with this if the “behavioral health professionals” wear the cool white outfits and get outfitted with oversized butterfly nets.

  65. But Enough About My "Essential Retiree" Status

    . . . I will be completely shocked if the government doesn’t do everything they can to kill or at least manipulate Bitcoin completely.

    It is, in all practical aspects, digital gold and in competition with fiat money, so yeah . . .

    • leon

      The thing about bitcoin is that it is actually pretty easy to set up to receive bitcoin in exchange for a service, without having to go through a 3rd party that requires your personal information (i.e, coinbase etc).

      It is hard to purchase coin without doing so.

  66. leon

    https://twitter.com/michaelmalice/status/1344748010824224769

    The Great Reset is not a conspiracy theory
    It is an explicit, public plan

    This is something that is a bit infuriating for me. They explicitly say something and then when there is push back, they call anyone who is pushing back a “Conspiracy Theorist”. What they are doing is trying to make it seem like nothing bad could ever happen from what is going on.

    Then when something bad happens they say “who could have predicted that this would happen?”

    • Ownbestenemy

      Because its propaganda.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      Conspiracy theory gets thrown around way too much.

      Humans are social animals that organize. Humans also take actions to advance their own interests. Humans taking action while organized suddenly becomes a conspiracy theory.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Tho guys discussing knocking over a gas station is by definition a conspiracy. It happens all the time.

    • Drake

      You can literally read the book written by the creepy German globalist guy.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Nah, nah…itsa conspiracy theory bro, on the order of Holocaust denial.

  67. R C Dean

    So, Uruguay’s gun laws are disappointing.

    Shotguns limited to 4 shells. Not sure if just using the plastic rod that gets the capacity down for bird hunting will do the job.

    Semi-auto handguns limited to 9mm or less. I can live with it, but dammit, I like my .45.

    Semi-auto rifles limited to .22 LR.

    Looks like I’ll be picking up a lever action rifle and a revolver if we expatriate there.

    • Urthona

      Why are you expatriating there?

      • Drake

        *Cough, cough* 92% white *clears throat*

      • R C Dean

        We haven’t decided to expatriate, or exactly where. Uruguay is on the short list.

        Expatriation is Plan B, if some of the current bad-case scenarios start working their way up the list of “likely to come about”. The list of institutions in the US that are transparently rotten and seemingly unsalvagable is getting long. The possibility of a currency/economic/social collapse is definitely in play. If the US truly takes a sharp downward turn, I want to have some options.

        We’ll be in a good economic position to leave in a couple of years. We could accelerate it, but I don’t think we’ll need to pull the trigger that fast. At this point, we’ve never been to Uruguay – we’re planning to visit later this year when travel restrictions are lifted. We’ll also do a separate trip, probably early next year, to Panama and Costa Rica.

        Or, I could clear a quarter billion in Wednesday’s PowerBall drawing. Which will wipe the board, and we’ll need a whole new set of plans.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Any thoughts toward getting ahead of inflation by getting as off grid capable as possible? When saving is ineffective, reducing cost is still effective.

        I fear that property taxes will wipe away any gains from homesteading or otherwise reducing longterm costs.

      • R C Dean

        We haven’t seriously looked at off-the-grid. We could easily do solar, if we wanted to invest in it. Seeing what is happening in CA, its looking more like a smart play. Water, though, we couldn’t do – no well permits for where I live.

        The classic inflation hedge is hard assets – real estate, hard money, etc., that work as preservation of value as the currency depreciates. Of course, the other inflation hedge is investments that stay ahead of inflation, which can be really hard to do in a full-blown reserve currency collapse. If the dollar goes down, it will take (just about?) every other currency with it and set off a global economic disruption unlike any we have ever seen. The recklessness of our rulers simply defies belief.

    • leon

      Nice info, When i lived there, i wasn’t in a position to own a weapon.

    • Not Adahn

      Mexicans seem to make .38 Super work just fine.

  68. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of the First Amendment-

    How is protesting peaceful assembly in the proximity of government health officials anything BUT “Petitioning for redress of grievances”?

    • Ownbestenemy

      FYTW

    • UnCivilServant

      “Petitions for redress must be filed on the appriate form with the proper agency for the greivence in question, to be filed and reviewed at the agency’s discretion. We do not accept petitions in the form of disorderly conduct.”

      /Swamp

    • leon

      I just think it’s funny that possibly the most Democratic controlled location in the United States, requires these kinds of permits and stuff for Protests and such. Nothing says “We love free speech” like “you improperly filled out your form 1221 B, in you request for a petition to redress grievences”

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is even funnier when you realize that D.C. is directly controlled by the Constitution and they still don’t follow it.

    • Not Adahn

      The Constitution is not a suicide pact!

    • wdalasio

      Because they’ve pretty much cowed their target market. It’s now widely considered a sign of civic virtue to blindly accept what you’re told by the authorities. Even noting glaring inconsistencies is now something deemed socially unacceptable.

      It’s an idea I’ve been mulling for a while now. If you can get people to accept a lie that they know is a lie, you’ve pretty much got them. They’ll accept whatever you tell them after that. Because when they knowingly accept the lie, they’ve emotionally invested in accepting your judgement and perceptions over their own. When they choose to accept the lie, they’ll fight tooth and nail to maintain that lie and any other lies they’re fed from the same source.

  69. The Late P Brooks

    Conspiracy theory gets thrown around way too much.

    True. Pointing out the obvious and easily foreseeable effects of some activity or program (public or private) doesn’t really qualify as a conspiracy theory.

  70. The Late P Brooks

    Mexicans seem to make .38 Super work just fine.

    My Llama 1911 in .38 super is a great shooter.

    • R C Dean

      I’m thinking we’ll hang onto the 9mm Sigs, and I’ll get a revolver and a lever-action rifle in the same caliber, probably .357. I’ll be money ahead after I sell the. 45 and the M1A.

  71. Mojeaux

    The moment it starts looking like Bitcoin really will be regulated, it will tank. It can’t act like the stock market.

    • leon

      The threat of regulations is why i kick my coin holdings off of third party services.

      • Mojeaux

        Could you elaborate? I’m not quite sure what you mean.

      • leon

        I’ll buy coin on coinbase, but once it’s available, i move it off to a personal wallet not controlled by coinbase, but myself.

      • Mojeaux

        I didn’t know you could do that! How DO you do it?

  72. The Late P Brooks

    It’s an idea I’ve been mulling for a while now. If you can get people to accept a lie that they know is a lie, you’ve pretty much got them. They’ll accept whatever you tell them after that. Because when they knowingly accept the lie, they’ve emotionally invested in accepting your judgement and perceptions over their own. When they choose to accept the lie, they’ll fight tooth and nail to maintain that lie and any other lies they’re fed from the same source.

    A long long time ago, I was talking to a friend (about what I have no idea), and he said something which burned itself indelibly into my brain:

    “First, you have to disprove the obvious.”

    That is what they are trying (mostly successfully) to do.

    • Akira

      It’s been a massive help for the Establishment that the media has made a brand out of Science™. For most people, Science™ means “listen to the government and obey them”.

      And people tend to choose brands based on the emotions and self-image associated with a given brand.

  73. ElspethFlashman

    Yay ! I get to drive to a real courthouse tomorrow and do a hearing in-person. It’s just like old times.