Saturday Morning All is Normal Links

by | Jan 16, 2021 | Daily Links | 278 comments

 

The buzz has already started- “We’ll be done with the COVID shit in the next two or three months. The economy will recover by spring and we’ll all be back to work. We’re going to massively raise taxes, while playing word games about how the chocolate ration has actually been increased. We’re going to ratchet up our involvement in the Middle East and suck up to Iran. We’ll be healing the relationship between the press and the president and make sure his back is covered. We’re going to fuck up the health care and insurance system enough to get you screaming for complete government takeover.” Back to normal.  Aren’t you relieved?

Instead of my usual list of birthdays, I’m going to single one out. Bob Park never achieved the fame and fortune of people like Neil deGrasse Tyson, but he was better than any of them. Far better. Bob actually was a pretty decent physicist, but what he really was was a very effective bullshit filter. He was relentless and unsparing, and never gave a shit about whom he pissed off. Anyone who hasn’t read Voodoo Science ought to, and you can spend hours laughing and marveling at the weekly columns he churned out over the years. Sure, he was an unrepentant liberal, but he was an honest and intelligent one. Bob died last year, but would be 90 today. A great life, well lived. Bob was one of my heroes.

Now the news.

 

An absolute fucking mystery, this.

 

“Mr. President, we can’t afford to have a Pillow Gap!”

 

Cough, cough, bullshit, cough, cough.

 

Grifters move.

 

“This is the moment in which we will start rebuilding the welfare state,” because this time will be totally different, see.

 

I bet you will.

 

“…and we have contracted with Dominion to run it.”

 

Old Guy Music today is a short bit from one of my favorite albums. The dirty non-secret is that no matter what they call it, the song is C Jam Blues. Jazz yodeling, whoda thunk?

About The Author

Old Man With Candy

Old Man With Candy

Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me. Wait, wrong book, I'll find something else.

278 Comments

  1. Cy

    Are we ever going to trust our elections again?

    • Nephilium

      I’m sure Jimmy Carter will come by and observe the next ones to be sure they’re good. Are you going to doubt Jimmy Carter?

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        ? cuz Jimmy Carter has a way / Of screwing up the USA

    • Sean

      Nope

    • straffinrun

      Again?

  2. The Late P Brooks

    No more Banana Republicans!

    The tyrant is dead. Long live our new tyrant.

    • rhywun

      I have a feeling the next four years are going to be more darkly humorous than anything the Trump era could come up with. So there’s that to look forward to I guess.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        And that’s with the media doing everything possible to carry every single drop of Biden’s water.

  3. Count Potato

    “Data from the Human Mortality Database, a research project run by a global team of demographers, suggest that COVID-19 did not reverse years-long declines in child mortality, despite a mortality surge in the general population.”

    Was there a surge in the general population?

    • Gender Traitor

      For some values of “general.”

      • Gender Traitor

        Also for some values of “surge.”

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        Also also for some values of “mortality.”

  4. straffinrun

    “ We’re going to ratchet up our involvement in the Middle East and suck up to Iran.“

    First part, yes. Suck up to Iran? That country has been on The US hit list for decades and I don’t expect that to change.

    • WTF

      If you ignore the Obama admin. lifting sanctions and delivering pallets of cash, sure.

      • Cy

        There’s an ironic meme going around asking if all of the republicans are now domestic terrorists, when do they get their planes full of cash and free toyotas?

      • straffinrun

        Pallets of cash is better than what the US has been doing in the region. Of course, leaving all of them alone would be my choice.

      • WTF

        Leaving them more or less alone was what OMB did, so that’s a non-starter.

      • Atanarjuat

        OMB left the agreement made with the pallets of their cash and bombed an important military leader. But he did choose to offer only token retaliation when they shot down a drone and also when they shot rockets at our base, which laudably defused tension.

      • Pi Guy

        Leave them alone? Are you serious?

        How will the Bidens and Cheneys and Kerrys and McConnells get “jobs” for their kids?

      • Rebel Scum

        You don’t want a return to normalcy? C’mon, man. We have wedding parties to murder-drone!

  5. The Late P Brooks

    “Despite the Pandemic”

    I’ll have to really steel my nerve to go past the headline.

  6. Stinky Wizzleteats

    “Phoenix doctor says post-Covid lungs are worse than someone who’s smoked for 30 years”

    Pneumonia or the equivalent causes damage? Well I’ll be damned…now do the flu and other respiratory diseases.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Plus anecdotal, a double blind study hasn’t been done to attest to this supposed fact. If they can use that argument so can I.

    • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

      Yeah, as someone who got scar tissue on 40% of his lungs when he was in his mid-20s from the flu and a secondary infection, I’m not that juiced about these stories.

      All infections are potential game-changers for everybody. The ‘Vid’s nothing special in that regard, and it’s yet another aspect of the disease that we need to stop freaking out about.

  7. The Late P Brooks

    The real payoff, Biden said, will come from uniting the nation in a new effort grounded in science.

    *slams coffee cup to floor*

    • Fourscore

      Untie, not unite?. Now I’m grounded and no coffee? C’mon man, give an old guy a break.

    • rhywun

      Kind of busts up the narrative the left has in their back pocket. What were you thinking, The Daily Mail?

    • Rebel Scum

      Smart Democrats who trust SCIENCE are about to take over.

  8. Count Potato

    “More than 4,800 boxes of ice cream are found to be contaminated with Covid in China as authorities scramble to contact people who could be affected

    Dr Stephen Griffin, a virologist based at the University of Leeds, said the ice cream’s positive test likely derived from human contact and was a ‘one-off’.

    He told Sky News: ‘The chances are that this is the result of an issue with the production plant and potentially down to hygiene at the factory.’

    That the ice cream is made with fat and is stored at cold temperatures would make it easy for the virus to have survived, he said.

    But he added: ‘We probably don’t need to panic that every bit of ice cream is suddenly going to be contaminated with coronavirus.'”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9153403/More-4-800-boxes-ice-cream-contaminated-Covid-China.html

    Someone took a shit in the ice cream?

  9. Stinky Wizzleteats

    “Grifters move”

    Man did the NRA pick a good time to become an ineffectual organization that people don’t want to give money to or what? LaPierre needs to be bounced out of there on his crooked ass.

    • straffinrun

      Am I missing something? The NRA always looked like controlled opposition to me. Got my first shotgun at 14 and don’t remember anything the NRA had to do with it.

      • Fourscore

        First Model 94 Winc, with my paper route money at 14. Didn’t see Wayne but ol’ John Wayne was backin’ me up.

        I did belong to the NRA for a few years, the defining moment. Took a while to understand some folks were living a little better than me and was sending them my money.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Sure but they’re the only gun rights org in town as far as normies are concerned. Without them those people will be politically uninvolved vis a vis gun rights.

  10. Grumbletarian

    It’s going to be interesting to watch the Dems balance “Covid’s on the decline, proles, everyone get back to work” with “The pandemic is still too dangerous to give up unlimited mail-in voting!”

    • Nephilium

      Balance? Why would they need balance? It’s totally reasonable to require a driver’s license or state ID to open a bank account, fly on a plane, purchase liquor, purchase tobacco, purchase marijuana, purchase guns, drive a car, etc… but completely racist to require one for voting.

      • hayeksplosives

        That’s different because the Noble Savages have a hard time getting an official license without the beneficent hand of White Liberal Man aiding him.

        It’s not reasonable to expect the downtrodden brownies to get proper documentation, so the left just helps them vote. (Teehee.)

        Truthfully it would be interesting to see what would happen if the money and energy spent to “get out the vote” were spent helping people obtain a legal government ID instead. Then they could vote at the polls AND be able to board flights, open bank accounts, etc.

        So, you lefties really want to help these citizens exercise their right to vote, or do you just want their ballots filled out for your election purposes?

      • rhywun

        Then they could vote at the polls AND be able to board flights, open bank accounts, etc.

        …get a job, get benefits, drink, drive, etc etc.

        This idea that there’s all these citizens running around without any id is patently ridiculous.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Pfffft, consistency has gone out the window. Doublethink FTW.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, holding two contrary beliefs simultaneously is kind of their schtick.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      And masks.

      I expect our statewide mask mandate to hang around through summer, just in time for it all to pick up again next fall and start all over.

    • Rebel Scum

      Double-think is their specialty.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        How can it be a specialty when it’s their only play in the book?

        It’s not just a specialty, Doublethink is who they are at their core.

    • Drake

      It’s like watching them wrestle with their natural inclination towards tyranny versus their desire to win future elections and remain in control forever.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Biden’s proposal comes as a divided nation is in the grip of the pandemic’s most dangerous wave yet. “We remain in a very dark winter,” he said.

    The political outlook for the legislation remains unclear, although a powerful business lobbying group, the U.S. Chamber of Commerce, welcomed its focus on controlling the pandemic.

    Okay then. If the Chamber of Commerce approves, it must be good.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I couldn’t care less what his ancestors from almost 200 years ago did, I care about the epic badness he’s going to do now and it’s going to be terrible.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Personal responsibility is out. Ancestral guilt is in. Get with the program, Stinky!

      • Atanarjuat

        Just a prediction: one of the few good things Trump did – removing the SALT deduction – will be rescinded by Biden. His administration may even use Fed money to spackle the crevasses in state budgets.

        By the way that documentary about Sumeria was excellent. It made the period much less confusing and gave a clear impression of who the different groups in the region were. I want to try to recreate that ancient recipe he mentioned.

      • Count Potato

        documentary about Sumeria?

      • Atanarjuat

        Episode 8 of the Fall of Civilizations podcast on YouTube.

        Only complaint was, as a person who has some expertise in botany, he showed some stock footage of date palms when talking about plants they cultivated, but some footage of Washingtonia palms snuck in with it. They are a fan palm growing in desert oases in northern Mexico/southern California and have palmate rather than pinnate leaves.

        Would watch again.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        “God doesn’t care who you were, son, He only cares about who you are.”

    • Cy

      “President-elect Joe Biden’s promise to spend trillions could bring back a healthy level of inflation that has been lacking since the 2008 financial crisis and put an end to the nearly 40-year bull market in bonds.”

      They should slow down, we’ve got 4 more years of this shit and I wouldn’t want them to break their backs carrying all of that water!

      • juris imprudent

        healthy level of inflation

        W T absolute F ???

      • Fourscore

        We’re all gonna be rich, gonna get that $15 an hour job bagging groceries. Finally a livable wage. While the new economic advisors look a lot like the old ones the new guys understand Modern Monetary Theory, the old guys were not true believers. This time it’ll work, for real.

      • juris imprudent

        Well bring on the Mugabe-bucks!

      • Pi Guy

        “Thank you. Since we decided a few weeks ago to adopt the leaf as legal tender, we have, of course, all become immensely rich.”
        Ford stared in disbelief at the crowd who were murmuring appreciatively at this and greedily fingering the wads of leaves with which their track suits were stuffed.

        “But we have also,” continued the management consultant, “run into a small inflation problem on account of the high level of leaf availability, which means that, I gather, the current going rate has something like three deciduous forests buying one ship’s peanut.”

      • Tulip

        A little inflation acts as a lubricant for economy.

      • Cy

        The “bull market in bonds?” What is this guy like 18? There was a time when a saving account paid more than 1% interest. Sadly it was like 2002?

      • Rebel Scum

        healthy level of inflation

        Devaluing the currency (and necessarily your savings) is “healthy”.

    • Atanarjuat

      That reads like a hostage confession. Why is the author blinking so much?

    • mrfamous

      If Modern Monetary Theory is correct, then we need to get these people out of the macro economics realm and into far more important areas, because they’re the greatest geniuses the world has ever seen. Because if something that all logical reason would suggest can’t possibly true, actually _is_ true, that’s some next level genius.

      I suspect, however, that indeed they are wrong and that they have not been able to conjure up free lunches out of thin air.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    “We need to be getting to more than 3 million vaccinations a day, rapidly,” said Wen.

    At gun point, if necessary.

  13. rhywun

    The president has now said he disavows the violence he incited at the US Capitol last week when he urged a mob of his supporters to march on the building.

    OFFS. I don’t know how you people manage to slog through so much derp.

    And that’s before all the attention on the My Pillow Guy.

    WTF

    • Count Potato

      “The president has now said he disavows the violence”

      He’s been saying that all along. So I don’t see how he incited it.

      • Not an Economist

        He didn’t say the magic words.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I’m not going to bother looking for the quote but he specifically said to march peacefully. If someone can be damned for meaning precisely the opposite of what they said we’ve gone to a truly dark place.That being said, he really does seem to have been rattled to his core by it and it sucked all of the fight out of him. He’s going out like a sucker.

      • Cy

        I can’t imagine what he’s going through with all of his business being openly attacked and the left having him un-personed. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure he’ll be ok. The guy can clearly get back up after a good beating, but damn if it’s not hard on him, let alone a US President leaving office on top of it all.

      • rhywun

        To be fair, his attention is probably on the titanic pile of politically-motivated prosecutions that will land on Jan. 21.

    • Rebel Scum

      Ain’t blatant propaganda fun?

    • mrfamous

      I’m seeing the “now said” formulation used a lot these days. Popehat used it against Dave Smith the other day.

      From context it appears to mean: “this is what the person has been saying all along, but I’m going to use ‘now said’ in order to insinuate otherwise.”

      • juris imprudent

        Hmm, how can that be turned on the COVID hysteria?

  14. rhywun

    Dutch gov’t collapses

    Jealous.

    • Old Man With Candy

      Except it will now be take over by a party full of AOCs, Expect shortages of tulips, chocolate, and wooden shoes.

      • Gender Traitor

        ::starts to stockpile chocolate::

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        I was hoping for the right winger who looks like a slightly younger Jimmy Page. Oh well…

      • rhywun

        Oh well, you win some you lose some.

      • Trigger Hippie

        ‘Except it will now be take over by a party full of AOCs…’

        So, a reverse Dutch-Oven?

      • Cy

        4 girls 1 cup?

      • zwak

        The Hague Steamer.

    • straffinrun

      *Sticks finger in dike*

      • Festus

        She don’t like that much.

  15. Festus

    The nose knows!

  16. Festus

    I’m headed to bed but this time without lighting any fires. Happy dreams, Glibbies!

    • Cy

      G’ night Festus!

  17. The Late P Brooks

    What’s that quote, or saying? The one about the difference between people who talk people, and people who talk about ideas?

    That has been weighing heavily upon me, lately.

    • Tejicano

      Small people talk about other people. Average people talk about things. Great people talk about ideas.

      Or at least that’s the way I remember it.

      • C. Anacreon

        “People, People who need People, are the luckiest people in the world.”

    • Rebel Scum

      “Those who can’t do, teach and those who can’t teach, teach gym.”?

      • tripacer

        “Those who can’t wrench, teach. Those who can’t teach work for the FAA.” – A&P instructor

  18. The Late P Brooks

    ‘Til next time, Festus, you pyromaniac.

    • Festus

      ^ appreciated

      • Fourscore

        /Hides the gas can.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    …people who talk ABOUT people, et c…

    Stupid fingers brain.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Headline:

    “Senate Republicans Ponder Prohibiting Donald Trump From Seeking Office Again”

    Everybody wants to get into the act.

    “How can this possibly be legal?” you ask.

    *shrugs*

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      Even if the move is perfectly constitutional and legal, it sure isn’t a good way to score any of those healing points they keep going on about.

      • Gender Traitor

        I think the Dems’ idea of “healing” may involve cutting out the “cancer” first.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Yes. Let’s completely un-person 1/2 the country to purge the civilized folk of Trumpism.

        What could go wrong?

      • Gender Traitor

        “He has no internal organs left, but he’s cancer-free!”

      • Tejicano

        I was thinking it would be more like the healing that comes after an interview with STEVE SMITH.

      • Pi Guy

        And by interview …

    • rhywun

      In case the public was still under any delusions that there’s no Swamp.

      • juris imprudent

        We will never drain that Swamp by electing a caudillo; it will take the election of people to Congress that want to change what is there. If that is simply impossible, then you should be planning your exit strategy because there is no hope.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      No, they won’t ignore it.

      But they’re definitely watching it with the same decoder rings that help you read between the lines of the constitution to find its real meaning.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Now I’m grounded and no coffee? C’mon man, give an old guy a break.

    That’s “grounded” as in “sitting in Old Sparky, waiting for them to throw the switch,” Fourscore.

    Spoiler alert: The governor is not on the line. The cavalry is not coming.

    • The Gunslinger

      A gallows instead of old sparky but the same sentiment.
      I called up the mayor but he’s out to lunch.

      https://youtu.be/mLsjCLF_CtM

  22. The Late P Brooks

    W T absolute F ???

    Look, pleb. What the economy needs right now is 8% inflation, with 5% nominal interest rates, to really get things back on track. That’s how you make an economy grow.

    • Fourscore

      40 years ago 18 % inflation was just right and we all had WIN buttons on the only shirt we had. I miss the good old days.

    • juris imprudent

      Look! The numbers are bigger. Maybe we should go to base-8?

  23. Tundra

    Good morning, Old Man!

    And thanks for providing the daily rage!

    I don’t think there will be any Iran-sucking. I think we’re dropping bombs by Christmas. Pompeo said the other day that Iran is the new home for AQ. Right, Mikey. Tell us another one.

    I’ll admit, I’m morbidly curious what kind of shit show the Biden presidency will turn into. I think in a couple months, even the proggies will be wondering just what the hell they did.

    My song contribution this morning.

    Have a great day, friends!

    • WTF

      even the proggies will be wondering just what the hell they did
      Nah, that would take some self awareness. They will blame Trump and Republicans for any bad effects. Just look at how Obama got away with blaming his stagnant economy on Bush for 8 years, and then taking credit for the Trump economy. The left lives in an alternate reality.

      • Nephilium

        Shit… look at California. All of the issues there are still due to obstructionist Republicans.

      • Viking1865

        My California cousins blame all the issues in California on Reagan. No, not President Reagan, Governor Reagan. Who left office in 1975.

        Guess what? They’re leaving the Bay Area, and they’re moving to Austin. Sic transit gloria mundi.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Lol, that’s a new standard for reaching back into history. They normally stop the blame at Prop 13

      • juris imprudent

        The progressive version of the Great Satan.

      • Viking1865

        They’re absolutely fucking insane. Sisters, one has a bastard kid the other is childless. They’re both about to retire from some Bay Area public school system. They’re selling their house for like 800k, and taking their six figure pensions to Austin, and they both consider themselves to be very big rebels against the Establishment. Very Resistance, much Fight The Power.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Great, that’s just great.

      • Nephilium

        And the punishment for the sin shall be visited upon their children, and their children’s children.

      • hayeksplosives

        Glad I’m not the only one thinking this.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      Not this time.

      He has the media just like Chocolate Jesus did. We know they’re gonna carry his water. But this time around he has the social media machine to do the real dirty work of speech suppression and gatekeeping. He has full control over the dialogue in a way no other leader in the world has ever had.

      We’ve lost the war.

      • The Last American Hero

        He doesn’t have Obama’s Melanin Force Field. That’s why he’s got to go sooner rather than later.

    • Atanarjuat

      I remain skeptical that a Shia nation is now sheltering the most prominent Sunni terrorist group. Also I remain skeptical of anything ever stated by Pompeo.

      • Tundra

        It’s how these things always start. Remember Saddam’s WOMD? You gotta get the rubes fearful and fired up before you can murder the shit out of some people half a world away.

    • rhywun

      Near me. Rats, I missed it. ?

      I thought Cuomo was arresting anyone who gives a shot to the “wrong” person.

      • Count Potato

        For such an authoritarian, his ability to get things done is terrible.

      • zwak

        For an authoritarian, he seems to be typically competent.

        And that is why authoritarianism sucks so, so much.

      • Count Potato

        The trains don’t even run on time.

  24. Count Potato

    “President-elect Biden doesn’t need Congress to #CancelStudentDebt. He should take immediate executive action to help millions of struggling families, help close the racial wealth gap, and boost our economy.”

    https://twitter.com/SenWarren/status/1350160363875135490

    To be fair, no one actually needs Congress.

    • rhywun

      Why don’t we just #CancelAmericasDebt while we’re at it?

  25. The Late P Brooks

    Army of the wind-up monkeys

    Former Oklahoma GOP Congressman Mickey Edwards said that he is leaving his party because it has become a “cult” led by President Trump.

    Edwards was critical of Republicans questioning the results of the presidential election, and of Republicans who voted to throw out Electoral College votes of two battleground states after a mob invaded the Capitol building last week to stop their work.

    “This has become a cult. It’s no longer a political party. It’s a cult,” Edwards told Oklahoma’s News 4 on Thursday. “It’s the kind of a cult that when the leader of the cult does anything, no matter what it is, or how awful it is, they voted.

    “They voted to question the election results even after people came into the Capitol, tried to kill them and killed a police officer who was trying to protect them. And they did that.”

    One Capitol Police officer was killed during the violence last week. After police gained control of the building again, work continued on the Electoral College certification. A majority in the House GOP then voted to throw out the Electoral College votes of Arizona and Pennsylvania.

    Beat that tin drum, little monkey. Repeat the lies, and then repeat them some more.

    “One Capitol Police officer was killed during the violence last week” They won’t even publish a name. But the howling mob, whipped into a frenzy of bloodlust, tore that man literally to pieces in the middle of the Capitol rotunda, as President Cartoon Villain watched. Don’t succumb to the cult. Don’t ask questions.

    • Cy

      Every picture is full of people with phones out. A video of a cop being beaten to death with a fire extinguisher would be worth a ridiculous amount of money/fame… yet…. nothing. No one seems to have any info on the capital police officer but rumors.

      Rumors is all they’ve ever needed and it seems to be all they’ll need to succeed in their destruction.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Everything they do is predicated upon having total control over public speech. All they need is rumor to push what they desire, because what they don’t desire will be minimized via shadow bans (if not outright bans), minimizing organic viewing, “fact checks”, and other algorithm fuckery. When you live in a world where dissent is stomped in to the ground, you don’t anything more than rumor to push your narrative.

      • juris imprudent

        Seems like an awful lot of Americans are easily whipped into a frenzy on the basis of rumors.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I doubt that kind of rhetoric is going to help his political career in Oklahoma. The GOP would be well rid of him if they weren’t grifters just like he is.

  26. ElspethFlashman

    It was lovely to see some of you fine people last night.

    • Old Man With Candy

      And you and LH as well. Sorry we had to cut out early, but someone has to make dinner.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        What, you gave Jeeves the night off?

    • straffinrun

      Cheers to you and LH.

    • Tres Cool

      What the hell did I miss ? And what did Festus set on fire?

      Damn job…

  27. The Late P Brooks

    In case the public was still under any delusions that there’s no Swamp.

    Those noble public servants are at long last freed from their terrible slavish devotion to the Cult of Trump. They never wanted to go along with his evil schemes, but they were in enthralled. Now they are Saved.

    Let us rejoice.

    • rhywun

      It’s incredible that they’re not even bothering to try to hide it now.

  28. Count Potato

    “Bill Would Make New York First State to Ban Bulletproof Vests

    A New York lawmaker is attempting to seize body armor from civilians and would make it illegal to buy the protective gear in the state.

    The bill from assemblymember Jonathan G. Jacobson (D.) would outlaw the sale and possession of body armor in the state of New York. The bill would require residents who own a bulletproof vest to turn them over to police within 15 days of the bill becoming law. It would make New York the first state to ban the purchase or possession of bulletproof vests for law-abiding residents.

    New York already has a ban on the use of bulletproof vests while carrying out “any violent felony offense,” but Jacobson’s proposal would go beyond criminal use of the vests. New York has traditionally been at the forefront of efforts to restrict guns and associated accessories. If Jacobson’s bill passes, it could be the start of a trend across other blue states to target the protective items even outside their use in any specific crime…..”

    https://freebeacon.com/latest-news/new-york-bill-would-make-it-first-state-to-ban-bulletproof-vests/

    *lights John signal*

    • Old Man With Candy

      How could that possibly be constitu… never mind.

    • Cy

      Jesus Christ! That’s above Orwellian shit there. Not only will we not let you defend yourself, we won’t even let you wear anything that makes the beatings hurt less.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      They really do want criminals to run the roost so people have to beg government for protection.

      Not only have they made it illegal to fight back against an attacker, they’re trying to make it illegal to not get shot by one.

      • Mad Scientist

        criminals == government

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        This statement evaluates as true

    • rhywun

      I don’t get it. Is there a punchline or something?

    • Old Man With Candy
    • Rebel Scum

      Plebs don’t deserve any protection.

    • creech

      “require residents who own a bulletproof vest to turn them over to police”
      Question: Do these vests float when involved in boating accidents or do they sink to the bottomless lake like guns do?

    • mock-star

      That was weird when John obsessively kept up the vest ban thing.

  29. SandMan

    Regarding Bob Park, “unrepentant liberal”, yes he seemed honest and pulled no punches. How come those types seem to have gone extinct (rhetorical question). I don’t recall hearing much from him in the last 10-15 years though, I sure hope he didn’t die woke.

    • SandMan

      And BTW I think the chick with the big schnoz is beautiful.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        At first glance she looked to me like Zola Jesus.

    • juris imprudent

      They aren’t entirely dead, W.R. Mead is one of my favorite reads, even Mickey Kaus is typically good. And Taibbi still falls back on his roots at times, but he’s pretty honest.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Greenwald. At least when it comes to challenging government power.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes

      • Tundra

        His substack is great.

        He needs to drop the silly lefty thing and come over to the dark side.

      • Viking1865

        He’s still on the economic left. Like, he still genuinely thinks the same government that funnels billions to crony defense contractors will run the healthcare system in a sparking, efficient, and honest manner.

        In terms of practical governance, I would be willing to side with the Yang types and remake the welfare system into a negative income tax style thing. Honestly, the part that sticks in my craw about taxes is not poor people getting money for food, its that there are million dollar houses in Loudon County that I paid for. If I am going to see 20% of my income fly out of my check every month, I’d rather it go to someone whos making less money than me than to some GS12 or government contractor.

      • The Last American Hero

        That, and the fact that all those welfare programs return about 15 minutes after the first single mom blows her money on lottery tix and smokes, or some senior spent their money at the bingo hall or the home shopping network and can’t afford their meds.

  30. Cy

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/ushome/index.html

    The Daily Mail has a Trump countdown on their main page. They really do think it’s all just going to go away when he gets on his plane and flies off to Florida.

    • Rebel Scum

      I don’t recall an Obama countdown.

      • juris imprudent

        That was because of the endless weeping and rending of garments.

  31. Rebel Scum

    Unity/healing.

    “I can’t speak as to what is currently under investigation specifically or not, but there are members of Congress that have made public comments. Comments like that Muslim Americans should not hold public office. They’ve made public comments that are quite closely aligned with the beliefs of white supremacists and white supremacist sympathizer organizations. These are all public record. And, you know, people of color are not safe around any individual who, frankly, sympathizes with a white supremacist cause. And it doesn’t matter if you’ve been elected to Congress or not. It is a complete abdication of any responsibility that we all have to protect and defend and be there for each other as human beings and certainly as Americans. So it wasn’t safe. And the implications of that are quite dire. To not be in a secure location because being in the insecure location seems like a safer bet than being in a secure location. I mean, it’s pretty scary. I can also say I was not the only member of Congress that felt that way. You know, not every member was in that secure room.”

    • IntraveneousWoodChipper

      “ To not be in a secure location because being in the insecure location seems like a safer bet than being in a secure location. I mean, it’s pretty scary.”

      A real intellectual Colossa, that one.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “Fire, I like playing with it “

    • Count Potato

      “white supremacists and white supremacist sympathizer organizations”

      Who exactly? Are they all in hiding?

      • Rebel Scum

        “Anyone that disagrees with my politics is a white-supremacist.”

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Yes.

        In the recesses of her imagination.

        If anything has angered the fuck out of me in our era of obfuscation, it’s is the narrative that 1/2 of America are wHItE sUpReMaCiStS!

        I’d bet you can find more racists on your average college campus than there are real, no-shit WHITE SUPREMACISTS in the entire country.

        I know when I think about healing, calling every other person a science denying white supremacist as the default position is just how I’d handle it.

        But seriously: how has there been NO pushback from anyone on the left about that? They really can’t all be that fucking stupid.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I know quite a few who are. Ivy League educated too.

      • Viking1865

        The academy has been rebranding capitalism, limited government, and the bill of rights as white supremacy for quite some time now. Remember that Obama DHS guidelines on rightwing terrorism?

        The thing that gets me among the, I guess I will call them the Establishment Right instead of the cucks, is that we are now into our second or third decade of them calling everyone to the right of David Brooks Nazi white supremacist terrorists. They aren’t just making cynical political points. Or maybe it started that way, but now you’ve got actual legislators and actual bureaucrats who have grown up as Democrats hearing that stuff. You’ve got thousands of armed federal agents who believe that shit. You’ve got now multiple Congresscritters who honestly believe that is the truth. AOC is not a cynical political operative, she is a True Believer. Pelosi is a cynical political operative, shes 80. AOC is 31. To which they say “oh AOC is fringe.” Dude there are multiple “moderate Democrats” who are singing the same tune about insurrection, sedition, terrorism.

        They mean to crush you so that you never have power again, and the Establishment Right is still yammering on about first principles and imagining this is a fucking debate society. Every single piece I read from them on The Capitol Riot starts with this ritualistic flagellation about decency and the rule of law as though the Democrats give a shit about that.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        ?

  32. The Late P Brooks

    Why don’t we just #CancelAmericasDebt while we’re at it?

    Let’s just cut to the bloody chase.

    #CANCELAMERIKKKA

    • Gender Traitor

      When I was a stupid college kid with a bad attitude, I had a button that said “US out of North America!”

  33. Rebel Scum

    Fewer Children Died in 2020, Despite the Pandemic. Experts Are Trying to Figure Out Why

    *stares blankly*

  34. Rebel Scum

    Phoenix doctor says post-Covid lungs are worse than someone who’s smoked for 30 years

    Fear…fear…fear…

  35. Rebel Scum

    “Some wonder if we are reaching too far,” Biden said. “Let me be clear, I’m convinced we can get it done.”

    The real payoff, Biden said, will come from uniting the nation in a new effort grounded in science.

    You misspelled “leftist dogma”.

    • Mad Scientist

      “Science” is how the left spells it.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    I’ll admit, I’m morbidly curious what kind of shit show the Biden presidency will turn into. I think in a couple months, even the proggies will be wondering just what the hell they did.

    I don’t know about the “proggies” but guys like Jamie Dimon are likely to be suffering from a terminal case of buyer’s remorse in just a couple of months. Not even Janet Yellin can save them.

  37. Cy

    Can we just stop calling it a stimulus and just call it what it is: Blue State Bailout?

    • Viking1865

      I haven’t read the bill (don’t worry, Congress won’t either.) but it was my understanding that this one was mainly direct payments to individuals and small businesses. I haven’t seen much in the way of direct transfers to Blue State Model pension bombs.

      But of course, if it was in there, I doubt the media would highlight that, it would be buried on paragraph 27.

      • juris imprudent

        it would be buried on paragraph 27.

        Nope, completely ignored until picked up in some little conservative media source whence it will be fact-checked and found mostly false as it was only one tiny provision out of thousands.

      • Nephilium

        I’m waiting for a backdoor blue state bailout with monkeying with the SALT deductions… something along the lines of an adjustment based on the prevailing wages in your community, or the credit rating of your state. It’s cuts funding to the Fed Gov, while letting it go to the states. It’s not like Fed Gov wouldn’t just keep the printers running overtime. Shit, even pushing back against any of the ‘vid “stimulus” means you want everyone to die.

  38. LCDR_Fish

    Did your video get pulled or is it just me?

    Asked my buddy about the $15 min wage. He’s got a couple folks at his restaurant making that much but not all of them – “They’ll be getting paid under the table”

    • Tres Cool

      Better Remy

      Yes, she checks all my boxes. Bunk-worthy.

  39. The Late P Brooks

    Speaking of educational stuff, I watched a ~90 minute (two part) Limey show on youtube about Brunel, the Man Who Built England, last night.

    I liked it.

    Brunel, engineer extraordinaire.

    • Rebel Scum

      Almost as if it was a bullshit claim from the beginning.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And nobody will be held responsible for raising the stakes in political rhetoric.

  40. Rebel Scum

    Show me the man and I’ll show you the illicit tweet.

    “The revelation of highly inappropriate behavior by an individual selected to serve on the Independent Redistricting Commission is extremely disturbing,” Virginia House Democratic Caucus Executive Director Jaime Reimers said in a statement. “In being selected, this individual is entrusted with ensuring our democratic process by drawing the legislative lines of our Commonwealth for the next decade.”

    In one tweet from October, Feliciano retweets a picture of a massive pro-Trump caravan with the comment: “Amazing. There is No way Trump can loose. Unless the election is rigged.” …

    “Mr. Feliciano must be immediately removed from the Commission and Leader Gilbert and Delegate Cole owe Virginians a full explanation on why they believe an individual who denies the legitimacy of our elections is fit to serve on a Commission so crucial to our democracy,” Reimers’ statement said. “Virginians deserve answers in order to restore their trust in the selection process.”

    Maybe you should investigate apparent impropriety and enact safeguards to ensure election integrity if you want trust in the process.

    • juris imprudent

      There is No way Trump can loose.

      Kick his ass of the commission for inability to spell.

      • juris imprudent

        Well, that was just feckin’ perfect, now wasn’t it?

      • The Gunslinger

        That’s it. We need to kick JI off from our commission.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Isn’t the entire premise of the Voting Rights Act to provide a means of political input to those who felt the elections were rigged?

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Just shut up and lick the boot and maybe they’ll let you continue to have a job, if they’re feeling magnanimous of course.

    • Viking1865

      This is why I voted against the commission. They’re just going to stack it with leftie partisans.

      “We have a full range of voices on this committee. We have a college professor, two school teachers, a climate scientist, two retired public officials, an active duty Marine, and a community organizer.”

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Same. I voted against it for this specific reason. Unelected commissions do not provide an appropriate feedback mechanism.

      • IntraveneousWoodChipper

        Voted against it as well. Sounded like a scam from the beginning.

  41. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Nostalgia overload, a long haired Ron White set introed by the head jock from Revenge of the Nerds:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dfZi_ZSR9A

    Man has he milked it, he’s still doing mostly the same bit today from what I’ve seen.

    • juris imprudent

      It’s still funny, isn’t it?

      • Tres Cool

        c’mon….you dont still pee a little when you giggle from hearing ‘tater salad’ for the (n)th time ?

  42. juris imprudent

    So someone with something lose walks back the Dominion narrative.

    • Viking1865

      The fraud, if indeed there was large scale fraud and not just legal ballot harvesting, was always in the mail in ballots, and there’s no way to actually audit them. One of the Powerline guys said it best a few weeks ago “They stole it fair and square.”

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Someone likes their Website, that was a hard core suckup,

    • Cy

      “These statements are completely false and have no basis in fact. Industry experts and public officials alike have confirmed that Dominion conducted itself appropriately and that there is simply no evidence to support these claims.

      It was wrong for us to publish these false statements. We apologize to Dominion for all of the harm this caused them and their employees. We also apologize to our readers for abandoning 9 journalistic principles and misrepresenting Dominion’s track record and its limited role in tabulating votes for the November 2020 election. We regret this grave error.”

      Somebody can see which way the wind is blowing.

      • juris imprudent

        Or, someone doesn’t want to be held liable for, you know, false statements.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    Greetings, from the “Crazy People on the Internet” desk

    But this year, there are more US troops in Washington than in Iraq and Afghanistan. Massive iron and concrete barriers have been erected blocks away from the inaugural platform on the West Front of the Capitol. One official said well-wishers would be lucky to even glimpse the top of the Capitol’s white dome if they show up.

    It was always going to be an unusual inauguration, with mass gatherings now lethally dangerous due to the coronavirus pandemic, which Trump ignored. And the outgoing President, still lying about his election defeat, has said he won’t show up, denying Biden yet another important legitimating symbol.

    When the world watches on Wednesday, it will take away a tragic truth: Two great icons of US democracy, the Capitol and the White House, must now be sealed inside a vast cage to protect them from the people they serve.

    Those poor servants of the public. Amerikkka doesn’t deserve them.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      No CNN please, I can’t stomach it.

    • Tres Cool

      “Two great icons of US democracy, the Capitol and the White House, must now be sealed inside a vast cage to protect them from the people they serve.”

      I doubt they’re using “serve” properly in that sentence. Also- politicians with armed goon-squads cowering walls & fences behind because they’re scared the mob outside will hang them from a lamppost ?

      Good.

    • Muzzled Woodchipper

      Come on, CNN, you’re almost there.

      Two great icons of US democracy, the Capitol and the White House, must now be sealed inside a vast cage to protect them from the people they serve.

      If you have to seal yourself away from those you serve, it means you’re doing a really shitty job of serving.

    • Rebel Scum

      Please tell me that is from the editorial section.

      to protect them from the people they serve.

      *rolls eyes*

      If so then you are doing it wrong.

    • rhywun

      mass gatherings now lethally dangerous due to the coronavirus pandemic, which Trump ignored

      LOL

      I guess if you’re going to commit bald-faced lies to paper, might as well go full-barrel.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        mass gatherings now lethally dangerous due to the coronavirus pandemic

        As opposed to the mass gatherings all summer? Those were totally non-deadly.

    • Gdragon

      “legitimating”

      This is what an obedient couple does when they receive government approval for their family planning 😉

  44. The Late P Brooks

    “Prosecutors walk back claims that Capitol rioters intended to ‘capture and assassinate’ elected officials.”

    BUT WHAT ABOUT TEH ZIPTIES!?

  45. The Late P Brooks

    I’m waiting for a backdoor blue state bailout

    “Backdoor.”

    Stop it. You’re killing me.

    • Tres Cool

      Backdoor + blue….bruised ?

      “Gonna turn your brown-eye blue”

    • rhywun

      Yeah, no “backdoor” anything after Jan. 20. They are opening telling us exactly what they are going to do.

  46. Nephilium

    In today’s edition of using graphs to lie and scare: This is the image at the top of this news story:

    At least 17,000 more people than usual died last year in Ohio amid coronavirus (Story is paywalled, so most people won’t read it, I know I sure as shit ain’t paying for their news coverage)

    Just counting the lines behind the graph, just above the second line is 118,000, about half way between the second and third is 119,000, above the third line hovers around 125,000; however, 139,000 goes above the sixth line. This is why you need labels. Oh, and that 17,000 deaths is from all causes. So overdoses, suicide, murder, and ‘vid are all wrapped up in that increase.

    • juris imprudent

      The U.S. death rate has been climbing since 2008, so with both population growth and death rate climbing. Of course the media isn’t going to present it that way.

  47. The Late P Brooks

    “As the weeks of her tenure come to a close, she has not, however, established an office for continuing her platform in the post-White House years, according to a source familiar with her activities. Nor has she helped with the onboarding of incoming first lady Jill Biden — with whom she has still not made contact, a senior White House staffer said.

    OMG what a BITCH.

    Bill Clinton would have made a billion times better First Lady.

    • juris imprudent

      continuing her platform and onboarding of incoming first lady

      I hate this timeline.

    • Rebel Scum

      I don’t understand why incoming and outgoing first spouses should be in contact at all.

      • juris imprudent

        Aristocratic etiquette.

    • rhywun

      I’m not going to look but I’ll bet there were a zillion stories about Melania ignoring Lady Obama’s instructions at the end of her reign too.

    • creech

      Time to unperson whoever left off DOCTOR when referring to DOCTOR Jill Biden.

  48. DEG

    A Lung doctor here in the Valley is giving us a new look at some of the coronavirus’s long-term effects. Chest X-rays of patients he’s treated show post-Covid lungs are worse than a long-term smoker. This may even be seen in asymptomatic people.

    I smell bullshit too.

    Republican Texas Gov. Greg Abbott quickly welcomed the news, tweeting: “Welcome to Texas — a state that safeguards the 2nd Amendment.” The NRA said it has more than 400,000 members in Texas and plans to hold its annual convention in Houston later this year.

    Texas has a lot of gun laws.

    “You have my word: We will manage the hell out of this operation,” Biden declared. He underscored a need for Congress to approve more money and for people to keep following basic precautions, such as wearing masks, avoiding gatherings and frequently washing their hands.

    What could possibly go wrong?

    • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

      “You have my word: We will mismanage the hell out of this operation.”

      Fixed it.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      “his may even be seen in asymptomatic people”
      So I have 70 years worth of lung damage? how do I even breathe?

    • mrfamous

      “You have my word: We will manage the hell out of this operation,”

      Biden then called a lid on the day at 9:21 am and went back to his basement.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        Excellent.

  49. Rebel Scum

    A bunch of people from the office went to lunch together the other day. King Wreck-it Ralph upped his mask dictate awhile back to mandate the wearing of masks in all buildings. Most people in the office abide by this when not at their desks. So they get into a car with each other while masked up. They go into the restaurant with each other masked up. Then they sit ass to ass at a table with no mask.

    Ask me what my problem with this scenario is.

    • Viking1865

      When I had the ‘Rona and was speaking to the Health Dept about my close contacts, I started off the conversation with “In the five days preceding symptoms I only had contact with the following people while unmasked: Wife, Mother, Brother.” She said “Uh let me stop you right there, the mask isn’t really what we care about, its six feet or closer and 15 minutes or longer thats the rule. That’s who we need to alert to get tested. It doesn’t matter if you and they were masked, if you sat in a room with someone for fifteen minutes they are considered exposed.”

      I absolutely delight in telling COVID Ninnies this story, because it absolutely breaks their little brains. This is an Official Government Public Health Expert saying this, and they just cannot comprehend whats going on.

      • Rebel Scum

        That rule has gone out the window for some reason*, but it is still the rule that I go by.

        *Mask social signalling is preferred by our rulers, I suspect.

    • Cy

      Theatre is about the drama, not the reality.

    • rhywun

      I’ll say it again – I am not playing this game.

      I am not returning to the office or entering a restaurant or flying in a plane or visiting a government building or a theater or a school if I have to “mask up”.

      One exception is grocery shopping because, well, I have to eat. Another is buses, trains, or car services when absolutely necessary.

  50. The Late P Brooks

    If you have to seal yourself away from those you serve, it means you’re doing a really shitty job of serving.

    They deserve a better class of serfs. We really are a disappointment to them.

    • Viking1865

      After the uprising of the 17th of June
      The Secretary of the Writers’ Union
      Had leaflets distributed on the Stalinallee
      Stating that the people
      Had forfeited the confidence of the government
      And could only win it back
      By increased work quotas. Would it not in that case be simpler
      for the government
      To dissolve the people
      And elect another?

  51. Muzzled Woodchipper

    It’s been a few years, but I’m thinking of dusting this old place off and giving it a go again.

  52. The Late P Brooks

    Ask me what my problem with this scenario is.

    They should be fed intravenously, so they can keep their masks on at lunch.

    What did I win?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Drugs? ass? ^

  53. Mojeaux

    Meanwhile, Bitcoin is bouncing between $34k and $40k. I think it’ll hit $60k by the end of Biden’s first term.

    • Viking1865

      I’m still kind leery of Bitcoin as a store of value. Gold and silver have been precious metals across a whole range of cultures and times.

      • robc

        Btc is still fiat money. It is just well run fiat.

      • db

        It isn’t physical, but it’s not the same as fiat either, because the total number of coins is fixed.

      • Mojeaux

        I have a little. I’m not sure it’ll ever be a widely used currency, but it is there for when the internet crackdowns come (and they will) and there will be more things trading on the dark web than drugs and assassinations. Like … toilet paper.

    • kinnath

      At this point, just buy real things that you will always need.

      • Mojeaux

        Yeah, but my investment in it is a curiosity amount.

    • rhywun

      MUPSOC

      *snort*

    • commodious spittoon

      Making a mockery out of mocking fascism!

  54. LCDR_Fish

    Man…having a lot of issues with nordvpn this weekend – keep having to disable it because different sites don’t like the ip address – kickstarter, navy fed, etc. Really odd. Not sure if it’s just last patch or the site I’m connected to or what.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      I’m having the same problem with my VPN private internet access.

      It crossed my mind that we’re seeing another arm of Big Tech’s attack.

      • EvilSheldon

        This has been a thing for a long time. VPNs break targeted advertising, so a lot of sites block their traffic.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      A lot of sites just don’t allow VPNs but they’re forced to play whack a mole with the new servers that work for a bit after the VPN providers put them in place. Maybe they’re stepping up enforcement now that anonymity is considered to be problematic. Hopefully it’s just the latest patch that’s the issue but who knows.

  55. Rebel Scum
    • Fatty Bolger

      I knew it.

  56. KromulentKristen

    Watching an AvGeek channel on YouTube and the woman said American recalled its furloughed flight attendants a couple weeks ago.

    So I guess they’re “suddenly” anticipating normal air traffic?

    • Drake

      Maybe the ones they didn’t furlough all died of covid?

  57. The Late P Brooks

    I’m still kind leery of Bitcoin as a store of value.

    No kidding. I cannot help thinking one of these days, the audience is going to stop (or be prevented from) clapping, and Tinkerbell is going to auger in, in spectacular fashion.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The Federal government is not going to tolerate an alternative to the dollar.

      I would wager that they’re willing to conduct a physical war over preserving the validity of the US dollar and holding down an alternative fiat money.

      What do you think they’re willing to do against a currency that has no government guns behind it?

  58. commodious spittoon

    Good God what a snozz.