About The Author

Banjos

Banjos

Wife of sloopy, mother to three bright, curious, and highly active young girls. Perpetually exhausted.

426 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    “Judge rejects prosecutor’s motion to re-arrest Kyle Rittenhouse and raise his bail.”

    Good.

    • Rat on a train

      I’d say it is ok.

      • Festus

        Now use ASL. I dares ya!

      • Bobarian LMD

        Race baiter!

    • AlexinCT

      They will find a way around it… This behavior – standing up to the overlords and their agenda – will NOT be tolerated and this guy needs to be be made an example of..

  2. Count Potato

    Yet, everyone was so sure he was bludgeoned to death with a fire extinguisher. Was there ever even a fire extinguisher?

    • Rat on a train

      There were five fire extinguishers.

      • Festus

        “Four! There were four!”

      • Gustave Lytton

        “There are exactly 57 fire extinguishers!”

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      It’s interesting how this has worked itself into the public consciousness complete with false memories and everything. I was watching a video Glenn Greenwald, who I generally like, and he was referring to the video of the cop being bludgeoned with a fire extinguisher and how terrible it was. That video doesn’t exist.

      • db

        I wonder if anyone has asked GG to comment on that.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        It was a throwaway line that was just a disclaimer for a larger point which was that the insurrection wasn’t really an insurrection and that coming down heavyhandidly wasn’t a good idea. I agree with that but it was disappointing that he didn’t do his due diligence.

      • Festus

        He’s a Pinko that believes in the First Amendment. Don’t get your hopes up.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Sure but he’s one of the few (mostly) honest journalists out there.

      • Festus

        I admire his stance on this issue but he and I have disagreed in the past. The enemy of your enemy is not always your friend but admittedly, he’s being a stand up guy about this.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        He’s honest across the board.

        He’s not always right, but he is honest.

        And when it comes to challenging gov’s power, no one is better.

      • Count Potato

        Thread here:

        “Almost nothing is known about the death of Officer Brian Sicknick — not how he died or even when — but one thing is 100% clear:

        The story told by the media for over a month — not as a theory but as a Known Fact: that protesters killed him with a fire extinguisher — is false.”

        https://twitter.com/ggreenwald/status/1360023232301170689

      • AlexinCT

        They know damned well what happened, but they prefer to keep the old lies from being countermanded, so they pretend not to know…

      • hayeksplosives

        Much like the lady “freezing” about reporting covid deaths in nursing homes.

        She was afraid they’d get in trouble for telling the truth, and she’s even part of the Dem state machine! Inevitable that they’d spook their own side while showing the “other side” how they will be crushed for opposition.

      • Idle Hands

        This was a lie the moment they told the story. The original story said he collapsed at his barracks after the riot. I’m beginning to suspect he wasn’t even there.

      • Homple

        They’re waiting for the masses to forget that Sicknick was laid out in state in the Capitol Rotunda and given a hero’s sendoff before they reveal he died from a stroke or something.

      • commodious spittoon

        Died with riots, not of riots.

    • Plinker762

      It wasn’t a fire extinguisher, it was a baby!

    • Not an Economist

      There was a video of someone who threw a fire extinguisher that hit a cop. But that cop lived.

  3. Jerms

    Still no mention of the Cuomo story in the NYT. Im sure theyre working on it.

    • Festus

      I told Big Gay Jeff at work about Cuomo and the others stuffing infected patients back into nursing homes about ten months ago. He didn’t believe me.

      • AlexinCT

        They will not believe the recent revelation from the taped conference call where one of Cuomo’s people said that Cuomo and his people decided to lie about what they had done to avoid Trump using it to show they were playing politics either..

      • Festus

        The political snark on-site has subsided markedly since we’re back in the arms of Jesus. Now they’ve gone back to being long-suffering Public Servants.

  4. Count Potato

    “During Wednesday’s impeachment trial, Swalwell introduced tweets by Lawrence and another woman named Kylie Jane Kremer who both referenced a “Calvary” coming to Washington. Trump retweeted both women. Swalwell used Lawrence’s tweet to suggest it was a call to violent action, equivalent to the differently spelled military calvary….

    Mixing up “Calvary” and “cavalry” is common, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary.”

    Apparently.

    Anyway, I hope Swalwell gets crucified for this.

    • Sean

      *narrows gaze*

      • Bobarian LMD

        Democrats scored an own gol-gotha.

      • UnCivilServant

        Don’t worry, there will be more opportunities, this was only a Pilate program.

      • db

        I wash my hands of all this. It’s just bad puns as far I see.

      • creech

        You really nailed it, db.

      • hayeksplosives

        It is finished.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Just when you think it’s over, we roll out some new puns

      • SDF-7

        All these puns make it a really Good Friday…

    • Fourscore

      “Mixing up “Calvary” and “cavalry” is common”

      That’s a hill I’d die on…

      • R C Dean

        Well, maybe for a few days.

      • Rat on a train

        You may need a place to lay low for a few days.

      • Fourscore

        At least Custer took a stand

    • Charlie Suet

      Countdown to Merriam-Webster merging the definitions to help out their co-religionists.

      • Rat on a train

        Nah. Just add to the Calvary entry a note that it is often used by religious bigots as a call to violence.

      • Festus

        That Ling-Ling really messed with his mind. Wonder what happens when he draws the Queen of Hearts in a poker game?

      • Ted S.

        Nitpick: it was the Queen of Diamonds.

      • UnCivilServant

        No, Ted, you’re still not getting it.

        The card is whatever the Party says it is.

      • Nephilium

        It’s a sorry state of affairs when I can’t quickly find the playing card/”Call the police” scene from the Duckman episode The Mallardian Candidate.

        /not going to upload it for a joke.

      • Festus

        You are correct. Blame it on me watching that film 45 years ago.

      • Festus

        Awesome! I just realized it was Fang-Fang after I hit post which makes the situation even more ridiculous than it already was. Ling-Ling was a Panda.

      • Rat on a train

        Ling-ling is also a sociopathic Asian trading card battle monster.

      • AlexinCT

        I dated a Ling-Ling, but she went by an American name..

      • Festus

        Pearl?

      • AlexinCT

        No, a flower name.. But since she stalks me now and wants to cut of my long-long, I will refrain from writing it down cause she might find me.

      • Festus

        Chop-Chop?

      • AlexinCT

        You got it Festus… If she can’t own it, then nobody else can…

      • bacon-magic

        Quit bragging.

      • AlexinCT

        Et tu Bacon Magic?

      • Count Potato

        Because Swalwell never fucked a panda?

      • Sean

        Can you prove that?

      • UnCivilServant

        It’s the balance of probabilities.

        Pandas really don’t tend to fuck anything.

      • db

        I think Sam Kinison did a bit about that.

    • juris imprudent

      I hope Swalwell gets crucified for this

      And the horse he rode in on!

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I’m not sure if crucifying a horse is even possible without substantial modification

      • db

        Insert pic of Boris the Hangman from Blazing Saddles

      • hayeksplosives

        I believe is was the foal of a donkey.

        Kind of a humble entrance to the city.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Mixing up “Calvary” and “cavalry” is common, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary.”

      Uffda. I have to admit that I am one of those people. I had never noticed that they were not spelled the same until just right now. In my defense, since I am the pontiff and infallible, I have never felt a burning need to actually read much of the Bible or pay attention to the minor details.

      What a shitty way to start the day. Not only do I not have any divisions, but now I find out I don’t even have a platoon of horse riding soldiers? Fuck this noise!

      • hayeksplosives

        Chill, bro. No need to go nukequooler about it.

      • Rat on a train

        It is difficult enough to get a company of unmarried Swiss Catholic men. A platoon of unmarried Swiss Catholic stallions is relegated to history books.

      • Fourscore

        “horse riding soldiers? ” Fuck this noise”

        Garry Owen has a sad…

    • zwak

      Jesus, these puns are bad!

  5. Count Potato

    “”The idea of ‘otherizing’ people is something I think we’ve seen a lot of over the last four years,” Cooper said. “It’s so easy to otherize people, to make them other than, other than American, other than patriotic, other than human.””

    Didn’t Gina Carano just get fired for saying the same thing?

    • Rat on a train

      So other people have said the same thing?

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        Blah, blah, blah, whataboutism, blah, don’t hold me to my standards, blah, blah….

      • Rat on a train

        Other people get what the deserve. If they wanted to be treated as normal people they wouldn’t be other people.

    • Ted S.

      She was accusing goodthinkers of othering people.

    • WTF

      “IT’S OKAY WHEN WE DO IT!!!!!”

    • Idle Hands

      There’s no point in pointing out the hypocrisy of this anymore. It’s very clear they get off on it.

  6. Fourscore

    Morning Miss Banjos, your choice of music is great, an old guy can understand the lyrics. Always a pleasure to hear the Carpenters. Thanks for the memories.

    • juris imprudent

      YT served up another great voice for me after that.

      • Fourscore

        Yeppers,

      • Chai Girl

        She had a great voice.

  7. Pine_Tree

    Good morning Banjos. Much appreciated, as always.

    From the Swallwell article: “Mixing up “Calvary” and “cavalry” is common, according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary.”

    Well, for 6-year-olds and idiots it is…

    • rhywun

      *considers admitting I had no idea they were spelled differently*

      But the churchy one is a word I have never used or had much occasion to read, either, so I have an excuse.

      • KromulentKristen

        The church one is a proper noun, so not surprising you wouldn’t use it unless you were discussing Biblical shit.

      • hayeksplosives

        When I was little and wanted to avoid mixing them up, I thought of the French chevalier so I would know to use cavalry when talking of horseback soldiers. I also saw the pattern with “chivalry”, which pertained to knights, who rode horses.

        I was a weird kid.

      • hayeksplosives

        LOL.

      • Pine_Tree

        But not the only one who did that. “Caballero”, also.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        I was a weird kid.

        More like “I would’ve had a happy career as a linguist.”

    • Pine_Tree

      …and a whole bunch of y’all, evidently. Dang. Sorry ’bout that, I suppose.

  8. Count Potato

    The good thing about Utah permits is that they are recognized by many other states.

    • db

      I let my UT permit lapse once Ohio and most of the other states I go to started recognizing PA resident permits. NY, MD, and NJ are the only other PA-adjacent states and they will never, short of a SCOTUS decision forcing it, recognize an out of state permit, so the UT permit became less valuable.

    • Bobarian LMD

      Only if the state issues a permit, if it’s like here in KY. No permit is required anymore, but if you don’t have the permit, you don’t get the 32? state reciprocity.

      • robc

        KY got rid of the permit requirement? Cool.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Yeah, a couple years gags we became a CC state.

        But yeah, no reciprocity and still have to background check every purchase without one.

    • Festus

      ^ *insert Sean’s avatar right here*

      • Festus

        Haha! Legit LOL!

      • Count Potato

        You know you can resize pictures? Because that’s just ridiculous.

        *EDIT FAIRY NOTE*
        IT WAS INTENDED TO BE.

      • Sean

        Nice.

      • Aloysious

        I laughed so hard my eyes are watering.

  9. Festus

    I saw Capitol Panty Raid open for The Insurgents a few weeks ago at this little club in D.C. Was disappointed by the turn-out and the crowd didn’t really seem to be into it. Someone pulled a fire alarm halfway through the set so I didn’t even get to cash in my beer tickets.

    • hayeksplosives

      Darmok and Jalad, at Tanagra.

      When the barricade was opened.

    • WTF

      Although I guess they could just play Trump’s speech where he said go peacefully and point out the lack of any actual incitement to violence.

  10. rhywun

    You’re doing great, guys.

    BREAKING: Swallowswell is a POS.

    • hayeksplosives

      How is he even still in office, let alone on the intelligence committee, after getting caught red-johnsoned with Fang Fang??

      • db

        For exactly the same reasons that HC never saw any sanction for keeping a separate personal server that stored classified information.

  11. Tundra

    Love the Carpenters.

    Thanks, Banjos!

    A new neocon third party sounds like a blast! Great bunch of Americans!

    I am reading Scott Horton’s new book Enough Already: Time to End the War on Terrorism. If you thought you couldn’t hate neocons more, you are wrong.

    • AlexinCT

      I was more of a fan of Charisma Carpenter…

      Heard she is in the news as of late, and not looking too bad even at 50…

      • Festus

        I saw her in some B movie awhile back wherein she unleashed the pups. If those were bolt-ons then her surgeon was a master of his craft.

      • cyto

        What a weird coincidence.

        MSN pushed a story at me yesterday. This is what I texted my buddy:

        The society we live in…

        MSN filled my browser with feed headlines saying “buffy star Sarah Michelle Gellar supports abuse claims against Joss Wheden”.

        Holy crap! He is one of my favorites.

        So I click on the article. Charisma Carpenter has finally ended her 2 decades of silence about the abuse she suffered. Gellar issues statement saying she supports all victims of abuse.

        Holy crap Joss! What were you doing to these young girls??

        Carpenter detailed her abuse in an instagram post. She said it caused her so much stress that she had physical symptoms that she still suffers today.

        His crime? Did he force himself on her?

        Not exactly.

        She got pregnant and started showing in the middle of the season. When she came to him and told him she was pregnant, he got mad and said she was sabotaging the show. He called her fat and made a comment about keeping the baby. And then he “retaliated” by having her come to a 1 am finding call. (The show frequently filmed at night)

        That is it. He got mad because the actress playing a smoking hot high school student got pregnant, screwing up his show mid season.

        That is “abuse” and she must be supported.

        I mean, he might have been a dick about it…. But abuse that caused 20 years of pain?

        That is our world.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Victimhood is social currency, and they’re cashing a 20 year old check. Even though he is legitimately an asshole, they’re bigger assholes for holding a grudge for 20 years.

    • CatchTheCarp

      Looks like a good book – added to my wish list.

      • Tundra

        I’m enjoying it (if that’s the right word) because he does a great job of tying together the years of malfeasance, arrogance and stupidity that I only experienced in major news events. Iran hostage crisis, Russia’s invasion of Afghanistan, Iraq 1, etc.

        It’s not good for your blood pressure, however.

  12. Brawndo

    “I noticed when they put my tweet on the screen that all of a sudden my tweet had a blue checkmark next to it,” she said during an interview on the John Solomon Reports podcast. “… This way, if he entered that into congressional testimony, it’s a verified account, and it has, it could be applicable in law. Secondly, he wanted to show that my Twitter account had more gravitas than it actually did. He wanted to show that the president was trying to use me to bring in the cavalry.”

    It’s painful that this is the shit they’re bringing up in an impeachment trial, whether someone is “verified on twitter” or “has clout”. Then again, it’s another item on a long list of things that anyone can see to know these people should not be taken seriously

    • rhywun

      Some Dem is probably scouring Tik Tok for more “evidence” as we speak.

      • UnCivilServant

        “Repent, Harlequin!” said the TikTok man?

    • AlexinCT

      I am sure CNN and PMSNBC all have blue check marks – still – despite of 3 plus years of Russia!!!1!!eleventy!!

      • Bobarian LMD

        “Clout”.

        They have it, you don’t.

      • AlexinCT

        That’s why this can’t end with anything but people that have had enough of the abuse standing up and ending it…

      • juris imprudent

        So that means we rely on what, a handful of politicians there now? Or do the people suddenly vote out everyone there and we get a host of new, better politicians?

      • Tundra

        Nope. This beast will collapse. Not sure what happens then – no one knows.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Agreed.

        We can’t vote ourselves out of this mess. It’s too late for that.

    • WTF

      So, if Trump is responsible for the actions of his followers, shouldn’t Bernie Sanders be doing hard time for the attempted murder of Steve Scalise?
      Not to mention Kamala and the others supporting and encouraging the BLM/Antifa riots.

      • AlexinCT

        Why the fuck do you insist everyone be held to the same standards, you fucking prole? Know your place! Shut the fuck up and do what you are told by your betters!

      • cyto

        Also, both racist and sexist. Oh, and antisemitic.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That’s different!!!!!!

      • hayeksplosives

        They have gone full Minority Report on us. They know it’s evil intent with the Trump rallies vs noble justice warriors for BLM because we can read their thoughts.

  13. Count Potato

    “Joe Biden says U.S. has bought enough vaccine to give 300 million people two doses by the end of July – and slams Trump’s handling of buying and distributing shots”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9251513/Biden-tours-Maryland-lab-developed-COVID-19-vaccine.html

    “Biden suggests Americans will have to wear face masks NEXT YEAR after experts warned it may take until Thanksgiving to hit herd immunity”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9253041/Biden-suggests-Americans-wear-face-masks-YEAR.html

    So which is it?

    • rhywun

      They’re already claiming the vaccine (which someone said yesterday isn’t an actual vaccine) will require regular re-pricks so they’re laying the ground for masks forever.

      • Sean

        regular re-pricks

        I ain’t getting the first one.

      • Rat on a train

        I donated my doses to the wanty.

      • Idle Hands

        It’s an industry at this point.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        We already do that with the flu vaccine and it’s necessary for a pathogen that mutates quickly. They sold these vaccines a a cure all all the while knowing they were anything but and now they’re retconning.

      • cyto

        There was an article a couple of days ago that said that one of the vaccines was completely ineffective against the South African strain.

        So get ready for this to be the new normal.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Fuck that noise.

      • Nephilium

        Masks are the new t-shirt styled fashion accessory. They’ll be with us forever.

    • cyto

      The local news even had “rip and run with the press release” coverage this morning.

      Should have said “Biden continues with exactly Trump’s plan, except spending a couple hundred million extra on advertising.”

    • Festus

      I read that as Ezra Levin. He’s an Asshoe of a different flavor.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      When the North won the Civil War, it had grand plans to remake the South into a paradise of racial equality and universal love.

      LOL

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      But he suggests we also do some things to make sure polarization doesn’t cause national collapse or a civil war or something. He suggests fixing the Supreme Court (eg having more justices, with fixed-year terms) so that there aren’t constant crises about who gets to pick the swing vote. He wants to do something about the debt ceiling and other “ticking time bombs” where if the parties don’t agree, it causes some kind of disaster. And he suggests granting statehood to Puerto Rico and DC, because the better the electoral calculus is for the Democrats, the more the Republicans will have to change their strategy, and maybe their new strategy won’t involve them being evil racists, and then the Democrats won’t have to be so justly and correctly polarized against them (am I being unfair? check page 257 and see for yourself).

      Finally, he suggests some increased individual reflectivity and thoughtfulness on our own parts. If all of us just do a tiny bit each day to fight the polarization within ourselves, together we can form a growing tide of compassion and mutual understanding. Haha, yeah right.

      But of course. It’s the time-tested tactic of stating that you’re impartial, but your enemy is making you be an asshole. If they would just stop being such bad people you wouldn’t have to try to destroy them anymore and we could get along.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Bah, blockquoting fail on the first two paragraphs.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        How does this sound, Ezra? How about I don’t participate in your political process and I continue doing things to keep kleptocrats like you from pillaging my family’s rainy day fund.

      • zwak

        I only hit you ’cause I love you, baby!

      • kbolino

        We’re gonna give PR statehood even though they have rejected it in every referendum (or mass boycotted the referendum entirely), and we’ll probably do the same for DC too (which has never even had a referendum on the question). Don’t we generally require the consent of the people to take such actions? Yet they’re bandied about in political discourse as though the only important question is whether other people want it.

  14. Tundra

    Tulip and KK:

    I really enjoyed your video. Thanks for the lesson and properly cooking the steak!

    • Festus

      Seconded. I find them charming, especially because I’ve actually interacted with those cool chicks!

    • Idle Hands

      I enjoyed the video. But there’s only one way to cook a steak. And that’s a bone in ribeye on a cast iron pan smothered in butter two minutes on each side than thrown into the oven for a series of minutes that vary depending on thikness of cut.

      • UnCivilServant

        If you’re going to ignore all the rest of the meat on the cow, can I have it? There’s a lot of steaks you’re just leaving on the butcher’s table there.

      • zwak

        “But there’s only one way to cook a steak. And that’s a bone in ribeye on a cast iron pan smothered in butter two minutes on each side than thrown into the oven for a series of minutes that vary depending on thikness of cut.”

        What!? I can’t even with you people, cooking steak in an oven! That is as wrong as using a sioux vida loca machine or a big green eggs to cook with.

        Steak goes on the grill. Drink a cheap beer per side. If it is overcooked, you don’t know how to drink beer!

      • Sean

        Steak goes on the grill.

        I like you.

        That being said, I will cook steak in a cast iron during some of the worse winter times. It is the inferior method though.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Sous Vide as a pre-step to grilling works pretty damn good , too.

      • But Enough About [this space intentionally left blank]

        Same.

        I tried to do burgers on our grill several days ago, when it was -28° Celsius (-18° F) outside.

        Let’s just say it didn’t go well.

      • zwak

        There were many reasons my great-grandparents fled Canada…

      • robc

        Grill is correct, but also EvilSheldon has a good point, as reverse sear is the way to go.

        Indirect heat until internal reaches a good T then sear on direct heat.

      • EvilSheldon

        You’re doing it backwards, especially if we’re talking ribeyes. Oven first, to bring it up to temperature, then sear in dangerously hot cast iron.

      • Nephilium

        For that exact of temperature control, I use the sous vide.

      • Not Adahn

        While Hype might have been right that the technique was roasting, it becomes a steak under the “Prime Rib Exception.”

  15. robc

    Birthdays of note: Chet Lemon, Dom Dimaggio, HoFer Chick Hafey, Don Wilson, Todd Frazier (who is active so could still move up the list). Also, Jim Fogarty, the 19th century baseball player, not the President of Lehman Brothers and no relation to the members of CCR.

    Also two non-baseball KY borns: Abe Lincoln and more notably my Dad.

    This is his first birthday since he passed. I should probably calll my Mom (I actually talked to her already this morning but forgot to mention it, too early, didn’t realize it was the 12th).

    • Festus

      Those dates sneak upon you more as you get older. Sorry about your Dad, robc.

    • Gdragon

      Sorry about your dad robc. I think Chet Lemon is quite underrated but I believe we have discussed that before.

      If you want a name that I would be willing to bounce from the HoF to make room for Berkman Chick Hafey would be a fine choice 😉

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Impeachable offense

    Former President Donald Trump’s condition after testing positive for Covid-19 became so concerning last October that there was talk of putting him on a ventilator, according to what Trump told one person at the time.
    The detail raises questions about whether the former President’s condition was worse than officials were willing to publicly acknowledge, a development first reported in detail by The New York Times on Thursday.

    ——-

    The New York Times also reported that Trump was found to have lung infiltrates, “which occur when the lungs are inflamed and contain substances such as fluid or bacteria. Their presence, especially when a patient is exhibiting other symptoms, can be a sign of an acute case of the disease. They can be easily spotted on an X-ray or scan, when parts of the lungs appear opaque, or white.”
    The Times added that Trump’s oxygen level dipped into the 80s. Conley was repeatedly evasive with reporters about his condition and whether he was on given oxygen, only telling reporters once his levels had recovered that they had never been in the “low 80s.”
    Dr. Ashish Jha, dean of the Brown University School of Public Health, said Conley’s failure to disclose the facts was disturbing.

    When this “trial” is over, we can have another one. Nothing is more sacred than the public trust.

    • AlexinCT

      Panem et circens…

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      People with respiratory diseases might have respiratory issues that can be seen on X-ray? I’m going to put this in the no shit file.

    • Old Man With Candy

      I’m firmly of the opinion that endless impeachments and trials are a positive.

      • db

        MOAR GRIDLOCK!

        I can’t see how this does anything but make congressional approval ratings among the public do anything but go down. We might start needing imaginary numbers to represent the polling data. Heck, we might already–the politicians’ opinions of themselves are already on a scale orthogonal to reality.

      • Tundra

        Uh huh. When everything is done by EO, what the fuck does gridlock even mean?

      • db

        It seems that Congress only exists to do two things anymore: pass continuing budget resolutions and transfer more and more power to the Executive. Gridlock really only gives the 24 news cycle something to chew on during slow news days, and pundits can use it to argue why we need an emperor who can cut through it all.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        ^this

        There is no gridlock… it’s all a show as the ratchet continues advancing in one direction. With a few exceptions, the GOP is simply controlled opposition.

      • juris imprudent

        This really is the problem – the GOP can’t explain how it wants to govern except “not as much as the Democrats”.

        WTF kind of reason to vote for them is that?

      • kbolino

        The Democrats have no consistent governing platform either.

        Raise taxes on the rich! Don’t CAP the SALT deduction!

        Defund the police and military! The police and military are heroes!

        End the wars and spying! Make more wars and spy more!

        Spend more on crumbling infrastructure! Driving around is the cause of global warming!

        Unions are good! Blue collar workers are deplorable!

        Even their positions are often a nonsensical grab bag, though they do have the common thread of “keep the money flowing”.

  17. The Late P Brooks

    As for the former first lady’s condition, someone familiar with Melania Trump’s treatment said she never took the then-experimental Regeneron antibody therapy used to treat her husband. This person said it took “a very, very long time” for her to get better, but she insisted on letting the virus run its course and treated her symptoms with holistic medicines, such as herbal teas, and took nothing stronger than over-the-counter pain relievers.

    OH

    MY

    GOD!

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        *sigh* damn phone browser

        Anyway

        someone familiar with Melania Trump’s treatment

        Aka, a bunch of bullshit.

      • Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

        It may be BS, but I can believe it. My wife is from a Slavic country that sounds a lot like Slovenia. A lot of people in her family have the virus now and her advice has been to drink tea. It’s a thing.

  18. AlexinCT

    Holly fucking shit

    They want war. Now the troops staying in D.C. starts making sense..

    • db

      *checks bitcoin price*

      yep, makes sense.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m very wary of Bitcoin right now. All it will take is the threat of further regulation to cause a massive nosedive in its price.

        My general feeling on the current market is that the smart money is selling into the retail traders. We’re overdue for a plunge.

      • db

        That’s what stop loss orders are for.

      • Cy Esquire

        No matter what happens, the fed is going to PRINT!!!! So, I’m banking a fair bit on the crypto. LTC for me.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Not only that, holy fucking shit too…yes, they want to deprive you of banking and financial services if you have the wrong opinions. Just start your own financial sector, that should be simple enough.

    • Idle Hands

      They don’t want war they want an excuse to start killing Americans. So they are actively trying to get someone to take a shot at them.

    • UnCivilServant

      I still say that instead of rating from one to three stars, Michelin should have used one to four tires.

      • Bobarian LMD

        If you’re really, really good, you’re awarded a spare!

    • AlexinCT

      Ma che catzo? Questi idioti non sano quello che fano..

    • Tundra

      Excellent. Thanks, Pie!

    • robc

      Looking at the list of michelin starred restaurants in the US, and none of the them are hole-in-the-wall BBQ joints.

      They lose all credibility, if this is there standard – “exceptional cuisine, worth a special journey”, then they are missing a lot.

      • UnCivilServant

        Michelin ranks “Fine Dining” with a strong bias towards French Cuisine.

      • robc

        I understand that, as it is French based. But as they expand out, exceptional cuisine covers lots of stuff.

      • PieInTheSky

        Then again hole in the wall places got stars in Thailand or Singapore for local cuisine that was not fine dining so it happens

      • Old Man With Candy

        James Beard Awards are a MUCH more reliable guide toward genuinely good food, as opposed to good food with pretensions.

      • PieInTheSky

        then again since there is no good food in America it is a moot point

      • UnCivilServant

        How would you know? You refuse to come here.

      • PieInTheSky

        I don’t think can’t afford counts as refuse. Also there is a pandemic going on haven’t you heard

      • Bobarian LMD

        Fake news!

      • robc

        Agreed. If they said “exceptional french cuisine”, it would be fine, but when you leave out the modifier, you need to cover a lot more.

      • juris imprudent

        There is no overlap between Michelin and Guy Fieri’s Triple-D.

    • AlexinCT

      I thought you would link that car crash because of black ice in Texas…

      Speaking of which, how long before they tell us we can’t call it black ice cause it is racist?

      • Nephilium

        Fine.

        African-American ice.

      • AlexinCT

        I got nothing…

        OK..

      • Rat on a train

        ice of color?

      • Timeloose

        My old room mate once told me she got in to an accident on the way home from work because of the black guys on the road. She was a bit frantic and talked really fast normally, but even more so after being in an accident. It took us about 5 minutes for us to understand she meant black ice.

      • creech

        Aren’t we all supposed to capitalize the word “Black?”

      • Timeloose

        Nice,

        I like the backwards cap on the ice block.

  19. The Late P Brooks

    Different when we do it clause

    Senior officials who briefed reporters on a conference call on condition of anonymity said they began work on the new asylum process during the transition, working with international organizations helping migrants and the Mexican government. But they acknowledged it came together very quickly. Many details have not been spelled out, in part for fear of inundating ports of entry and international organizations with a flood of inquiries from desperate asylum-seekers.

    “We need to start asylum proceedings and allow … access to asylum proceedings in the United States for people who have been too long kept in Mexico and been unable to pursue their cases,” a senior Biden administration official said of the decision.

    We have always allowed the Office of the President Elect to begin taking operational control prior to the inauguration.

    DEMOCRACY!

  20. Old Man With Candy

    I got a phone call last night from a friend who works for a civilian body armor company, looking for help finding another gig. The general feeling is that the Feds are likely to put them out of business in the next year or two. I suggested that he bolt on some fake tits, have his dick cut off, and become a diversity consultant.

    My idea was not immediately shot down.

    • Sean

      I suggested that he bolt on some fake tits, have his dick cut off, and become a diversity consultant.

      I’m never asking you for advice.

    • robodruid

      Cosplay body armor?

      And all he has to do is wear a stuffed bra, no need to go radical

    • Tulip

      Why does he need to cut his dick? He should just declare he’s trans.

    • Count Potato

      *lights John signal*

    • EvilSheldon

      While there should be no doubt that the Progressives want to restrict private ownership of body armor, that’s a far cry from actually making it happen.

      Still, armor is a good thing to have. Two guns and no armor is worse than one gun and one IIIa vest…

  21. Nephilium

    Oh joy. Monday is SSL certificate expiration day for several servers that I support. The company I support has been ignoring the questions for the past 6 weeks asking for the updated certificates so we can schedule putting them in. As it stands, they’re asking for it to be done between 00:00 – 05:00 Monday morning (but still haven’t given us the new certificates). If they don’t, there’s always the self-signed path, which will lead to a couple hundred tickets Monday morning as everyone starts getting an error in their browser.

    • UnCivilServant

      Oh, man. I feel your pain. But… even the state is on top of SSL renewals better than that.

    • AlexinCT

      Yeah, this sounds like they need a bunch of angry proles with pitchforks to remind them not to be this inept…

    • Nephilium

      Still no new certs provided… why do I have the feeling that there’s going to be a big slew of tickets on Monday (either from self-signed cert or expired certs).

  22. The Late P Brooks

    Migrants who believe they are eligible will first register with NGOs, nongovernmental organizations that will identify those who are most vulnerable and stuck in limbo the longest. The Department of Homeland Security is building “electronic portals” for migrants to be able to register and check their status.

    Migrants will find out the details of the new system through social networks. “We’ll be doing a huge amount of media. We’ll be working with our international organization partners who have excellent social media networks that reach migrant communities to make sure that people understand who will be eligible for this program and who will not,” one of the officials said.

    After initial screening by the NGOs — which are not yet being revealed — migrants will be given an appointment to go through a port of entry. They will first be tested for the coronavirus and will be equipped with masks.

    We’re turning our immigration system over to a bunch of NGO subcontractors? Maybe that’s step one in AOIC’s “Defund ICE” process. I’m sure they will put everybody in INS out on the street, once the new system is up and running.

    We will let you in, as long as you promise to wear this mask. Just don’t forget to remember who your friends are at election time.

    • juris imprudent

      building “electronic portals” for migrants

      For people that often aren’t even literate in their native tongue?

      • UnCivilServant

        The purpose of building internet portals isn’t so people can use them or get services, it’s to pay the people who build internet portals.

      • UnCivilServant

        *note – those are always outside contractors and consultants. The permanant staff merely has to get the garbage to work after the highly paid people have flounced off to their next gig.

  23. egould310

    I’m taking the day off. Gonna’ go for a nice long run through the snow this morning. Then I figure some bar hopping this afternoon. Then pajamas, Netflix, and dinner. The real snowfall begins overnight. Should be a good weekend.

    • AlexinCT

      Party like you read about man…

    • zwak

      Bar hopping?

      Where you at Willis?

      • egould310

        Seattle. Restaurants/bars are just open enough that I can go in, order a cocktail, and drink a cocktail. It’s glorious. I’ll hit Ballard Ave. for lunch and then see where the afternoon takes me.

      • Nephilium

        Downtown Willoughby is doing an honest to gods bar crawl tomorrow afternoon (chocolate themed). If I hit my goal weight with tomorrow’s weigh in (not out of the realm of possibility), I may head over that way.

      • egould310

        Even if you don’t hit your target weight go to the bar crawl. Let off some steam. Willoughby is cool.

      • Nephilium

        That way lies to me cheating far too frequently. The architecture for Willoughby hasn’t changed, but the names on most of the establishments have. 1899 and Mullarkey’s are the long running establishments there now.

      • violent_k

        If you do that let me know. I’ll be working at my shop in the afternoon which is very close. Would enjoy having a beer with you. You should still have my email.

      • Nephilium

        Will do.

    • robodruid

      She is going to end up just like Jeb!

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Good, she’s one of the worst politicians on the face of the planet, just a neocon douchebag like so many others.

    • Festus

      It’s Trump’s Party, win or lose. Populism is not going away.

      • juris imprudent

        The problem I see is that populism is exceptionally susceptible to demagoguery. That usually doesn’t end well.

      • Festus

        I never offered a judgement. It is what it is. Do you think those crazy flag wavers are going away? 74 million American Citizens voted for Trump. The Dems have the high hand for now but they are poking the bear.

      • zwak

        It is always going to be demagogued as long as only one person is standing up and saying something that 75m people agree with. And that is the problem. Until you have a political system that takes those people and their wants and needs seriously, this is what you are going to get. Bitching about it in the “woe is populism” way won’t change that.

      • AlexinCT

        Accusing people that clearly see their and their children’s futures being pissed away by a credentialed bunch of assholes that have enriched themselves selling the country out to an enemy – China – and play games where they split us into categories they promptly incite to oppose each other, so they can of all things change the system from one with accountability to one based on arbitrary things that can change on a whim so they can institute a hereditary oligarchical class, of being motivated by nefarious reasons, sure as hell will do nothing but make those people, with their backs pushed against the wall, decide the only option they have left is to fight.

        But I now suspect that the cuntes fomenting this division WANT these people to fight back so they can present them in the most despicable light possible and then use this to fuck over everyone by legalizing their statism and efforts to consolidate power over the unwashed rabble.

      • juris imprudent

        Exactly – this does not get solved through the agency of Trump or any other single politician.

        Now tell me which party is going to align a governing approach with all of those folks?

      • Drake

        As opposed to elitism?

      • Count Potato

        Worse. Populists at least have to be popular.

      • kbolino

        Do you define populism and demagoguery differently? They seem to be synonyms.

    • AlexinCT

      I bet this is either a mischaracterization, or she has now become part of the swamp and worries that if she doesn’t do this she will not get positive coverage..

      Too many people are seeing the cancel culture’s effectiveness and opting to avoid it..

      • Festus

        There’s always been a back-lash to overreach. We haven’t been to the edge of the cliff quite yet. The majority of us are still too damned fat and happy to give a shit. Lefties are playing with fire.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Those politicians opting to avoid are doing everyone a favor by outing themselves as not having the stones to do what needs to be done.

      • juris imprudent

        What needs to be done?

        What is that exactly, and why would we expect a presidential candidate to be the proper person – you know, investing all of our hopes and dreams in a single personality.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        What needs to be done is not caving into this shit like a spineless tub of goo, that’s about it.

      • Drake

        She was always a swamp creature.

  24. Festus

    Future thought. All the ladies getting titty-jobs are going to look rather odd when they’re slumped in a wheelchair, drooling and yet still have the bosom of a twenty year-old.

    • db

      In 200 years, they’ll be lamenting how all the cemeteries have become toxic waste dumps from all the ruptured implants…

      • Festus

        Viagara turned the fish gay so now we have to eat grubs.

    • AlexinCT

      Why do you hate old home geezers that will enjoy those flotation devices Festus? I am hoping when I decide to move into an old home and chase old poon, there are plenty of these ladies to go around… How else am I gonna get some serious VD and die with a smile on my face?

      • Festus

        I never stated that it was a BAD thing! Sheesh, get offa my lawn!

      • Pope Jimbo

        There will be plenty of granny gash to satisfy all your desires Alex. Since women tend to outlive women, the homes are usually heavily skewed in favor of women. Add to that that the men that are there are not 100% able to get it up, so any guy who can still walk the walk is going to be very popular.

        Alex’s future

      • AlexinCT

        GRANNY HUMPING!

      • kinnath

        As often as I can.

      • Pope Jimbo

        A “friend” has told me that the real sweet action is the gum jobs, not the humping.

      • Festus

        ^^^ Winner for most distasteful comment thus far. Huzzah!

      • Fourscore

        At a certain age a driver’s license is sufficient to turn the ladies’ heads

      • Festus

        Legs that work are also a real chick magnet.

      • Tejicano

        Q: What does 80 year-old pussy taste like?

        A: Depends

      • AlexinCT

        My gal….

        Flavor it up babe!

    • cyto

      Ok, true story.

      When I moved to Florida I went apartment hunting with a coworker. A realtor took us to see a condo on the beach. On the way up we shared the elevator with a lady who was in her late 60’s or early 70’s. And she looked it.

      She went in to the condo next door to the one we were looking at. We looked around in the main room for about 2 minutes, then he took us to the balcony. He wanted us to see the view, the only thing this condo had going for it.

      It had a nice view of the intercoastal waterway and he pointed out that if you look to the left you can see a bit of the beach and ocean.

      So I lean out over the railing and have a look at the view.

      The neighbor is standing there on her balcony, 6 feet away, totally naked. She looks exactly like you would expect a reasonably in shape 70 year old woman to look ….. Except for her absolutely perfect 20 year old, gravity defying D cup breasts.

      Welcome to Florida.

      Apparently she was really eager to share her new boobs with us, because she had to have speed undressed to beat us to the balcony.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Welcome to the Villages.

      • Festus

        “The Viiiiillllllaaages” They used to play those commercials non-stop when I still had The Golf Channel.

      • Q Continuum

        Del Boca Vista.

      • Festus

        Del Vica Bosta!

      • Festus

        *fun fact* Jerry Stiller could never remember scripted lines unless he shouted them.

  25. cyto

    Ok, this is a weird one. I was searching completely unrelated terms that did not produce good results and Google pushed this as the #4 answer.

    https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/ivanka-trump-lap-sitting/

    So there was a picture is a 15 year old Ivanka Trump sitting on her dad’s lap at a concert. It was circulated as “Ivanka gives her dad a lap dance”.

    Now… Compare and contrast this with other “fact check” stuff you have seen. Normally they will fact check the claim, and then spin it to the direction they want. They have even been saying that a video that shows exactly what someone claimed proves that they lied.

    So on a claim of “Ivanka Trump was caught giving her dad Donald Trump a lap dance when she was 15”, they rate it mixed. Because it is a picture of those two people. But not a lap dance.

    Not earth shattering, but odd that it would be pushed to the top by Google and pretty indicative of what these places are all about.

    • Festus

      I don’t know the family dynamics enough to render a judgement but having only raised step-children I know that a nice clean elbow bump is the way that I greet my adoptive flesh and blood. What a monster.

    • Pope Jimbo

      It is sort of sad what Snopes has done to itself.

      In the Before Times they had a simple site that debunked various urban legends. They had a lot of trust and their brand was good.

      Then they tried to up their game and get in the Big Leagues and sold completely out. Who believes anything out of Snopes anymore?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Middle aged Democrat women.

      • cyto

        Twitter. Facebook. Don’t they use snopes for their blocking disinformation algorithm?

      • Cy Esquire

        It’s one of the ‘reaffirmers.’ If you try to have a political conversation with a proggy, they have multiple skin suited organizations tat they mimic, that mimic each other. Like the fire extinguisher and the 6 deaths and the mueller report and russia/putin and hunter biden’s laptop and the BLM astroturfing.

  26. Chai Girl

    Morning Everyone. I’m drinking my chai latte.

    • Tundra

      ‘Morning!

      Black coffee with a little Fourscore brand honey for me!

      • Chai Girl

        Coffee with Honey?

      • Tundra

        Yep! I don’t like stevia or sugar. It’s just sweet enough and honey is good for you. Especially Fourscore’s!

      • Festus

        It contains Glibertorians.

      • Chai Girl

        I tried it once, I didn’t like it. Tasted weird. I like Vanilla Sugar in my coffee or the syrups I have.

      • Tundra

        I imagine that it depends heavily on both the coffee and the honey. Mine is an espresso roast brewed in the trusty Aeropress.

      • Nephilium

        Why not just make better coffee?

        🙂

      • Tundra

        First cup is straight up (with MCT oil). Second has the honey. Brain first, blood sugar second.

      • Count Potato

        MCT oil?

      • UnCivilServant

        Muscilated Collagen Tar.

      • UnCivilServant

        Sorry, that was supposed to be ‘Muscinated.’

      • Sean

        I just use coconut oil. One scoop for me, one for the coffee.

      • Tundra

        Medium Chain Triglycerides. Derived from coconuts. Shortcut to the liver for ketone production and a brain bump.

      • Count Potato

        OK, thanks.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Good morning! I thought for half a second about drinking the mint tea that I had forgotten last night and left steeping for 10 hours, but decided that a coffee would be less bitter.

      • Chai Girl

        You have to dilute that mint tea with water. Wow, that would be minty.

    • Sean

      Morning.

    • The Notarious GT

      Yum! Chai latte is my weekend morning beverage of choice. And this is a 3-day weekend for me!

    • Rat on a train

      Ito En Sencha-Matcha

    • Count Potato

      I got a chai latte from Starbucks once. It had no spices because it was 100% sugar. It made malta goya taste like IPA.

      Regular Indian “chai” is good though….

    • juris imprudent

      What is this? Is it the Chai, or Girl that threw everyone off? Or have I not been around enough to know a Tulpa when I see one?

      And give the proper greeting – Fuck Off Tulpa!

      • UnCivilServant

        She’s been around for a while, JI. You’re late on the greeting.

      • Nephilium

        In fairness, she’s usually just lurking over my shoulder.

      • juris imprudent

        Now that’s bizarre, I saw her on a Glibs zoom before I caught her handle.

  27. Count Potato

    “MAGA Blood Libel: Why Are They Hiding The Medical Report?

    Law enforcement officials now tell CNN that there was no fire extinguisher blow, no bloody gash, and no blunt force trauma to Sicknick’s body when he died.

    Not only that, but it is increasingly unclear when, where and if Sicknick was even rushed to the hospital.

    As it turns out, multiple hours after the protest had already concluded, Sicknick texted his own brother Ken that very night he was basically fine, other than being “pepper sprayed twice,” confirming he was safe and “in good shape.”

    Then, an odd thing happened. The next afternoon, the Sicknick family began getting phone calls that Officer Brian Sicknick had been declared dead. The phone calls didn’t come from the hospital. They didn’t come from the treating physicians. They didn’t come from the US Capitol Police, or the FBI, or the DOJ.

    They came from media reporters.

    Certain privileged media personnel were evidently the first to receive sensitive information circulating among “law enforcement officials” that Brian Sicknick was dead.

    But then the story got stranger. In a dark, twisted echo of Monty Python’s “bring out your dead” scene, it turned out Sicknick was not dead yet.

    The US Capitol Police responded in a public statement late that Thursday evening that swirling media reports were untrue. Sicknick was still alive.”

    https://www.revolver.news/2021/02/maga-blood-libel-why-are-they-hiding-the-medical-report/

  28. Pope Jimbo

    Speaking of reading comprehension problems…. I am a victim of the Trans Agenda!

    I was reading this story about a push to make more people ‘mandatory’ reporters and thought we had a serial rapist on our hands after reading this passage.

    Sellie, who uses the pronouns they/them, was a teenage participant in the Young Artists Initiative (YAI) more than a decade ago when founder Jefferson Fietek allegedly raped them. Though Sellie shared what happened in a Facebook post and then attended a follow-up meeting with their parents and other adults, none of those people reported the allegation to law enforcement.

    Turns out that only one person was raped. Which is bad, but better than people letting a guy who had been confronted by multiple accusers of simply walking away. After reading more of the story, I had to go back and read closer because the other victims weren’t mentioned. Then I caught the bit about Zander wanting to use the pronouns them.

    So the rape accusation was only for one person. (again, bad). But what the fuck editors? You had to know that the story was confusing because you were using plural pronouns? Why not just use his name again if you are so worried about using standard pronouns?

    • Pope Jimbo

      Uffda! Bad blockquote, bad blockquote!

  29. The Notarious GT

    KC! One of my favorite WWDVs! (Women with Deep Voices) ::lights Mojeaux signal::

    I sometimes like to play a game called “World’s Worst Vocal Quartet,” listing 2 M & 2 F recording artists who shouldn’t be. (Yoko Ono & Neil Young are usually two of them.) Instead, let’s play World’s BEST Vocal Quartet. Here’s a start:

    S = Alison Krauss
    A = Karen Carpenter
    T = Josh Groban
    B = ??? (Open to suggestions)

    • robc

      Neil Young wins over Bob Dylan?

      • The Notarious GT

        Young & Dylan are usually the two male singers in my Worst list.

      • Count Potato

        Technically, young Dylan was a very good singer, he could hit and hold notes extremely well. He just had a nasally voice.

    • egould310

      B= Isaac Hayes. Plus he can compose, arrange, conduct music. Good pianist, too.

      • The Notarious GT

        Good call!

    • LCDR_Fish

      Not sure about bass, but two of my favorite singers the last couple years are Ivy Levan (diva) and Gin Wigmore (raspy). Bonus points for Poppy.

    • Chai Girl

      One of my favorite voice was Freddie Mercury. He had a great range and can sing anything from Opera to Rock. Loved his voice.

    • KromulentKristen

      B = Tim. Foust. Period.

    • juris imprudent

      B? You already have the first letter… Barry White.

      • juris imprudent

        And then immediately realized I may have had the wrong B – Brad Roberts.

    • zwak

      Baritone should be Nick Cave.

    • cyto

      If we can include the dead

      Roy Orbison
      Freddie Mercury
      Patsie Cline
      Linda Ronstadt

      • Tundra

        Smokey.

      • Mojeaux

        Linda Ronstadt’s not dead.

      • cyto

        Didn’t mean to imply she was dead… Those are just my favorite vocalists.

        Although her voice is actually dead. Crying shame.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Bass/Baritone:

      Modern
      Tim Foust
      Avi Kaplan
      Geoff Castellucci

      Old School:
      Thurl Ravenscroft
      Tennessee Ernie Ford

  30. Count Potato

    “Inside Planned Parenthood’s Gender Factory

    How significant is this revenue stream? I’ve never been able to obtain numbers on that, though the Planned Parenthood website for Central and Western New York states that: “Nationally, Planned Parenthood is the second largest provider of Gender Affirming Hormone Care.” It seems reasonable to conclude that hormone treatments—pricey as they are—now contribute materially to Planned Parenthood’s bottom line.

    According to the employee, based on her recollection, 1-2 new biologically female teen patients seeking testosterone would arrive per day. A few reasonable assumptions and some arithmetic reveal that a shocking percentage of the town’s teen girls came through the clinic over just a few years.

    There were no doctors at the clinic where she worked. Nurse practitioners were the professionals with the highest medical training, she said. The clinic employed a gender counselor who had “no actual professional credentials or formal training other than being MtF” (that is, a male-to-female transgender person). Adolescents would come and speak to this gender counselor and Planned Parenthood would then forward the counselor’s “notes to an actual licensed mental health professional somewhere off-site, and rubber stamp approve the patients to begin their transition. This is basically how they circumvented the requirement to speak to an actual counselor,” according to the employee’s Twitter post.

    Whether patients received specific treatments—a course of testosterone, say—was decided by the “clinic manager,” with “no prior medical experience” whose prior job was “managing a Wendy’s,” the employee wrote.”

    https://abigailshrier.substack.com/p/inside-planned-parenthoods-gender

    • limey

      Does the neo-vagina come with fries?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I have a niece who’s twelve and a daughter who’s 14.

      Middle school girls are completely obsessed with the gender bullshit. It’s a fashion accessory, a way of gaining social currency during an uncertain period in their lives. The schools and the parents are failing them miserably by indulging it. Now the medical community is getting in on the act and the action.

      It makes me sick to my stomach how much damage is being done to them.

      • Q Continuum

        Just as always, the Hippocratic Oath takes a backseat to ideology. Thus it has been, thus it will always be.

      • db

        I have an eight-year-old niece who rambles off the gender talking points–but it’s in the form of “you can be whatever you want to be” as if it were the same thing as telling little girls they can grow up to be an engineer or a carpenter–or any profession that in the past was restricted to men. It’s being sold as an expression of freedom, but I really worry for people who will take medications and have surgeries to fix conditions that may not even exist. Some things are permanent, and cementing for life what for many children is a temporary confusion and uncertainty seems beyond malpractice to me.

      • Q Continuum

        “cementing for life what for many children is a temporary confusion and uncertainty seems beyond malpractice to me”

        Of course it is, but see my comment above. Ice-pick lobotomies were wildly popular in spite of legions of people being turned into zombies from them.

      • UnCivilServant

        Given the number of mindless zombies we have nowadays, I’m not so sure we’re not still lobotomizing large swathes of the populace.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Agreed. Gender and sexual orientation are all the rage with MS aged girls right now.

        Apparently, all but 2 of the girls in my 13yo’s class are lesbian.

        2 of the boys are gay.

  31. Chai Girl

    Karen Carpenter had a great voice. Another great female voice is Pat Benatar, she can sing anything.

    • Festus

      She was trained for opera IIRCC.

    • Mojeaux

      Correction: Karen Carpenter had the most perfect voice to ever sing.

    • The Notarious GT

      I would give my left tit to be able to sing like Ann Wilson.

    • hayeksplosives

      I love KD Lang’s voice. The vessel that carries it can fool you, but the voice is terrific.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    The enemy within

    Federal agents on Thursday arrested two Kentucky men associated with the so-called Boogaloo Bois, including one charged with crimes related to a Jan. 6 riot in Louisville, the Justice Department announced.

    John Subleski, 32, is accused of inciting a riot in downtown Louisville on Jan. 6, the same day a mob egged on by former President Donald Trump stormed the U.S. Capitol. Subleski was allegedly part of a militia group that identified with the Boogaloo Bois — an extremist movement that centers on planning for an overthrow of the U.S. government.

    Federal prosecutors allege that Subleski used social media to encourage others to take part in the riot. Subleski posted that it was “Time to storm” the Louisville Police Department, according to a criminal complaint.

    Another Louisville man, Adam Turner, 35, allegedly menaced a Kentucky police officer during a protest caravan through St. Matthews, Ky., on Dec. 25. Turner was carrying an AR-pistol and resisted arrest, according to a Justice Department news release. He later posted threatening messages against police on his social media.

    Both men could face up to five years in prison and a $250,000 fine.

    Since the Capitol riots, President Joe Biden’s administration has highlighted domestic extremism as a growing threat to the country. The FBI has arrested more than 100 people in connection with the riots, FBI Director Christopher Wray announced last month.

    Come up and feel the healing power of DEMOCRACY!

    We really dodged a bullet when we got Bad Orange Dictator out of the White House.

    • cyto

      Yeah… Just imagine how many americans would have been arrested by his shock troops…

    • Akira

      the same day a mob egged on by former President Donald Trump stormed the U.S. Capitol.

      The debate is over: Donald Trump is 100% responsible for their actions. It is known.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Inciting riots and threatening police? Why do those themes sound familiar?

  33. Pope Jimbo

    What sad days are these when we can’t even trust Congressmen who are banging Chinese spies?

    At least we still have Adam Schiff to tell us the unvarnished truth.

      • Tundra

        Fucking LOVE AO!

        Enjoy your day off, boyo!

      • egould310

        Will do. Thanks for the reminder about the MCT oil.

  34. kinnath

    Good Morning Banjos.

    The gif on the cover page is from one of the best ads ever to play on TV.

    • cyto

      I don’t thing gay means what he thinks it means.

      • Chipwooder

        Maybe he means gay as in “happy”?

  35. Pope Jimbo

    Come see the violence inherent in the system!

    CAIR threatens Minneapolis Park Board because it won’t sell land to a mosque so they can build a parking lot. One of the quirks about Mpls is the Park Board. They are completely autonomous from the City Council and are one of the counterweights to the Council’s silliness. The Park Board is supposed to keep the park system up and running for everyone. They do some silly stuff, but for the most part are pretty decent.

    The muslims using the mosque don’t seem to understand how the system works and have some flimsy excuses for why it is necessary for the Park Board to sell them the park land.

    Abdimagid Omar believed he could persuade the Park Board to sell the mosque a slice of adjacent parkland. Omar isn’t fluent in English, so he appointed congregant Abdi Barkat as his spokesman. Barkat works near Masjid Salaam and has been praying there during his lunch hour for about two years.

    He said no one has harassed him in the vicinity of the mosque, but he would feel safer being able to park closer. “When you are an immigrant, when you’re Black, when you’re Muslim, when you come into a neighborhood where you don’t live just to pray, anything can happen,” Barkat says.

    • Pope Jimbo

      And then CAIR got involved

      Hassan brought a resolution to the Park Board to sell a 60- by 117-foot parcel on the north side of the mosque in 2019. Many congregants attended in support. When Meyer announced that he planned to vote no, they called him a racist and shut down the meeting before the issue could go to a vote.

      Jaylani Hussein, executive director of CAIR-Minnesota, joined the mosque’s cause in 2019. With an urban planning degree from St. Cloud State University, Hussein devotes much of his time to helping Muslim communities fight land use rejections statewide, which he says are often the result of Islamophobia.

      • Pope Jimbo

        And before you start sending donations to Commissioner Meyer…

        Meyer moved from Sturgis, S.D., to Minneapolis at age 18 so he wouldn’t have to drive. He has never had a driver’s license. In 2015, he bought 13 copies of “The High Cost of Free Parking” by Donald Shoup to give each Minneapolis City Council member, then successfully campaigned to eliminate parking requirements around train stations.

        So there are no heroes in this tale.

      • cyto

        They certainly got the wrong board member for their issue.

  36. Festus

    I’ll reiterate from the overnight. Judi’s car is being taken care of and the cost will be about $150 all-in. It was the belt. I was thinking much, much worse. I swear to God that I am going to scrape together some funds and make that fucking Nissan run right as soon as the temperature gets reasonable. Funniest part is the “pretty girl” discount. If it would have been this old gargoyle it would have been at least twice the cost.

    • Mojeaux

      Congrats!

      “Pretty girl discount” is better than the “stupid lady” surcharge.

    • db

      Glad to hear it’s relatively minor. Re: the “pretty girl discount,” sounds like you have a good shop–I’ve had some discussions with mechanics who tried to take my GF for multi-thousand dollar fees because they thought they could get away with inflating costs and replacing things unnecessarily.

    • Pope Jimbo

      I don’t know about that.

      When I was younger, I had several pretty girlfriends who would come back from the mechanic with outrageous estimates that even a mechanically declined person like myself knew were BS. When I’d go back with them to the shop and the estimate would be significantly lowered.

      Now it is even worse. The Asian woman surcharge is enormous. Also doesn’t help that the wife likes to go to major chain repair shops. The worst was when her old swagger wagon developed a coolant leak and she went to Precision Tune and the estimate was $5K to repair it. I brought it to a small shop where my buddy worked and we got the leak fixed along with brakes and an oil change for $600.

      I finally have convinced her to bring cars to a small shop nearby that does good work for reasonable prices.

      • Mojeaux

        I have A Guy™, but he doesn’t do alignments, so we go to Firestone for tires and alignments. Very often, Mr. Mojeaux would rather go to Firestone than my Guy™ and it makes me mad. He seems to have learned his lesson, though, when he took my Zippicar to a chain (don’t remember which) for front end work and got a $1500 estimate. It was only because I threw a fit that we took it to my Guy™ and it a) didn’t need all that stuff and b) was significantly less money to fix what was really wrong with it. So we’re back to just Firestone for tires and alignment.

      • Chipwooder

        When I was truck shopping last summer, one of my motivations behind picking a Frontier over the F-150 and Avalanche that I almost bought was the fact that Our Guy™ only works on Japanese makes, and he’s proven himself trustworthy many times over.

        You can’t put a price tag on an honest mechanic.

      • Pope Jimbo

        I have to admit I know nothing about the car repair industry, but I have to think that a young man who likes working on cars would find that the world is his oyster if he started a small shop that simply did honest work.

        That is how Our Guy works. Like Mo said, we have had several times where they said that a) it wasn’t worth fixing or even b) it wasn’t really a problem and after a 5 minute tweak everything was fine, come get your car no charge.

        Like you Chip, if rioters were rampaging through his neighborhood, we’d show up as Auxiliary Rooftop Koreans because we’d be sunk without him.

        * A good friend of mine is a contractor and is booked out years in advance because he is honest. He does great work as well, but it is the fact that he simply shows up and does the work he promised to do for the price he said he would that makes him so in demand.

      • Chipwooder

        I hope that young man will be my son someday. He’s a smart kid but I can already tell that college might not be for him, and he has a strong interest in working on cars.

      • Pope Jimbo

        One of my son’s friends is like that. He went to the votech out of high school and has been working as a mechanic for several years now. Great kid.

        My only fear is that he might be a good mechanic, but he probably wouldn’t be very good at the basics of running a business. I’m not sure if you can start out already being able to pay for an accountant and an office manager to keep the business side of things working.

      • Festus

        I should re-reiterate. It was stupid fucking cold and Judi and her Daughter, although as pretty as daisies on a warm-winded morn are no shrinking violets when it comes to auto-repair. The personnel were nice and the repair cost less because they felt bad for them. They got to do a good deed and it didn’t kill my wallet. Double Plus good no squirming about under the car when it’s -17 American.

      • Pope Jimbo

        What a great feeling when a repair bill comes in under what you had thought it would be.

        Now you just have to pray and hope that you never find out that the real problem was that it was only a simple switch that had to be flipped on/off to clear things up. Because then you’d instantly flip from “I’m so happy it was only $150” to “I can’t believe that those jerks charged me $150 to flip a switch”.

  37. Mojeaux

    Missouri, which already has constitutional carry, just passed a law that “declare(s) ‘null and void’ any past, present or future federal law deemed to be an infringement on gun rights for law-abiding citizens.”

    • db

      hm, so the NFA doesn’t apply in MO?

      • UnCivilServant

        The ATF will still shoot your house and burn your dog down if you violate it.

        Or was it the other way around?

      • db

        Yeah, I wouldn’t want to be the test case.

      • Mojeaux

        Me neither but at least somebody’s saying something.

      • db

        There’s another potential risk–let’s say for instance that the NFA were to be struck down for some reason. Many states have laws outright prohibiting machineguns and other things covered by NFA, unless the weapon in question can be shown to be registered to the person in possession, as recorded in the NFRTR. If something were to blast the NFA away but not to affect the state laws, it would be quite confusing and dangerous for people who have registered weapons under the NFA.

  38. The Late P Brooks

    The problem I see is that populism is exceptionally susceptible to demagoguery. That usually doesn’t end well.

    If not for Them, how would Us define themselves?

    • juris imprudent

      As bad as our elites are, I’m not voting for an American version of Hugo Chavez.

  39. The Late P Brooks

    I love KD Lang’s voice. The vessel that carries it can fool you, but the voice is terrific.

    You want to talk voices?

    Shania Twain.

    • Unreconstructed

      Great voice, but hard to remember, since the songs were so awful the only way to enjoy the video was on mute.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      Annie Haslam

      5-octave range

  40. The Other Kevin

    I’m ok with the Republicans breakup. Now if we could get the Dems to break up into two parties, we’d have something.

  41. Tundra

    Fuck you, Mother Nature. Fuck you Global Warming.

    Fuck it all.

    I’m still gonna go out and walk my 4. For Chafed and the GlibFit crew.

    But this sucks and I’m Cold.

    • egould310

      Beautiful song. Good guitar sound (duh). -12° is really cold, please bundle up. It’s 30° in Seattle. I’m debating on whether to wear leggings or not. Shorts, 2 dri-fit long sleeve shirts, light knit gloves, neck gaiter. Probably leggings too.

      Cold Cadaver https://youtu.be/UI1lPlDlXjk

      Cold Lips https://youtu.be/UI1lPlDlXjk

    • Fourscore

      Sorry, Tundra, you’re late to the party. It’s been upgraded to “Climate Change Crisis”

  42. The Late P Brooks

    I’m ok with the Republicans breakup. Now if we could get the Dems to break up into two parties, we’d have something.

    Those principled Republicans need to just jump the fuck out of the closet and embrace their Democrat-ism. I’m sure there is a program to assist them in their transition.

    As for the Democrats, the Socialist Workers Party could always use more dues-paying members.

    • cyto

      I think that problem has been solved.

      The establishment DNC thought BLM were their useful idiots.

      Turns out, the DNC were BLM’s useful idiots.

    • juris imprudent

      It isn’t like the Libertarian Party is going to be overwhelmed with new recruits.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    You’re cold?

    So is she

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Best Stones song bar none ‘cept maybe Time Waits for No One

      • kinnath

        Not even close.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        OK, best ever was wrong but I’ve heard all of the better Stones songs so many times they don’t do much for me anymore.

      • Festus

        Never was a fan of the Stones. Dug the Beatles for a bit. I need cancelling now.

      • Rat on a train

        I never cared for either. Double cancelling?

  44. wdalasio

    Populism is not going away.

    Because the elites still haven’t figured it out. Populism rises when elites fundamentally fail. And I think it’s really fair to say that, over the last decade or two, our elites have been found fundamentally wanting. Yet, they haven’t really paid much of a price for their incompetence and failures. These have mostly been passed on to the petit bourgeoisie and haute proletariat. They’re understandably not terribly happy about it. But, instead of listening to their complaints, the elites have responded mostly with contempt, disdain and dismissal. If they’re not sneering t them in the popular culture, they’re telling them they need to “check their privilege”. And loudly insisting to the petit bourgeoisie and haute proletariat that they should defer to the elites, mostly because of their second-rate credentialing.

    When you understand that, Trump makes perfect sense. But, even more, when you understand that, you understand that getting rid of Trump is going to do little or nothing to solve the problem. And the longer the issues are allowed to fester, the greater the resentment and anger you’ll see among the petit bourgeoisie and haute proletariat. And what comes after Trump might very well leave them pining for the days of mean tweets.

    • Chipwooder

      As many of us have often said, Trump was a symptom, not a cause. The discontent that fueled his election isn’t going to just evaporate now that he’s out of office.

    • Idle Hands

      We are going to get a legit facist movement in the near future if the left keeps doubling down. It will be predominantly right-wing but there will be some no joke progressive elements as well in it. Bernie expats seem to see the same enemies they just have tarded solutions but in the end that won’t matter because they will be facing the cattle cars like the rest of us.

    • Count Potato

      So Road to Serfdom?

    • Pope Jimbo

      The elite members of our society are still doing well. I don’t think they have necessarily failed.

      The problem is we confuse them with The Elite. The Elite has grown exponentially and there really isn’t any strict entry qualifications. Sort of loosely we think anyone who has a college degree is part of The Elite. With so many jokers now attending college and with actual standards in those colleges dropping, that qualification doesn’t actually mean that the graduate is elite.

      So the ranks of The Elite have swelled with a huge amount of people who think that they really are elite. They expect to be feted and treated with utmost respect by the rest of us. If The Elite would simply shut up and be happy they have an indoor job that pays well and doesn’t involve heavy lifting they’d be just fine and we’d all ignore them. But they can’t let it go. They have to force you to bow and tug your forelock when you pass them by.

      Their insistence on being respected makes the rest of us pay attention to what they are actually doing and how well it is going. And that leads to a ton of frustration. Populism is the reaction to The Elite.

  45. Idle Hands

    So is Biden with his school reopening plan going to actually close the already open schools?

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Populism rises when elites fundamentally fail. And I think it’s really fair to say that, over the last decade or two, our elites have been found fundamentally wanting.

    Yes.

    “Of the government, by the government, and for the government” is not nearly as popular out here in Greater Flyoverlandia than the swamp creatures seem to believe.

  47. The Late P Brooks

    We are going to get a legit facist movement in the near future if the left keeps doubling down.

    My guess is much of it will come dressed as “infrastructure improvements”.

    You know, You didn’t build that redux.

    • Drake

      I think old Benito would say we have already arrived.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        We’ve been technically fascist for a while. The Italians won WWII, even the damn Chinese do it.

      • kbolino

        The only thing most people can likely identify about Mussolini that they wouldn’t want in a politician today is that he allied with Hitler. Hitler saw Mussolini, the Italians, and Italian fascism as inferior to himself, the Germans, and the Nazis, respectively. Mussolini was always a junior partner and, as the war wore on, an expendable one as well. Mussolini was hanged for selling out Italy more than for being a fascist.

    • Festus

      I’m featuring tank trenches but they have a different purpose.

    • Festus

      Loathesome creature.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    I think old Benito would say we have already arrived.

    True enough, but there are still an awful lot of sole proprietorship businesses which need to be purged.

    Thank goodness for this plague. It has really allowed them to accelerate the process. One of these days, when I’m talking to my friend who owns the bar I go to, I’m going to slip and say, “Your pal Comrade Biden won’t be satisfied until you’re bankrupt and there’s an Applebee’s here.”

  49. The Late P Brooks

    House Sergeant at Arms says Pelosi will not be fined for violating her own security rules

    She’s one of the Good Guys. She’s no threat to anybody who isn’t a traitorous insurrectionist.

  50. The Late P Brooks

    We’re expecting a heat wave. The temperature is supposed to soar to zero on Sunday.

    • Rat on a train

      Break out the shorts.

    • Rat on a train

      They did say Trump made them do it.

  51. Count Potato

    “CDC Exposed: Inflated Covid Deaths By 1600% Throughout The Election, “Violated Multiple Federal Laws” Peer-Reviewed Study Finds…State, Local Governments Must Act

    “The groundbreaking peer-reviewed research…asserts that the CDC willfully violated multiple federal laws including the Information Quality Act, Paperwork Reduction Act, and Administrative Procedures Act at minimum. (Publishing Journal – Institute for Pure and Applied Knowledge / Public Health Policy Initiative) Most notably, the CDC illegally enacted new rules for data collection and reporting exclusively for COVID-19 that resulted in a 1,600% inflation of current COVID-19 fatality totals,” the watchdog group All Concerned Citizens declared in a statement provided to NATIONAL FILE, referring to the Institute for Pure and Applied Knowledge study.

    “The research demonstrates that the CDC failed to apply for mandatory federal oversight and failed to open a mandatory period for public scientific comment in both instances as is required by federal law before enacting new rules for data collection and reporting. The CDC is required to be in full compliance with all federal laws even during emergency situations. The research asserts that CDC willfully compromised the accuracy and integrity of all COVID-19 case and fatality data from the onset of this crisis in order to fraudulently inflate case and fatality data,” stated All Concerned Citizens.””

    https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2021/02/cdc-exposed-inflated-covid-deaths-1600-throughout-election-violated-multiple-federal-laws-peer-reviewed-study-finds-state-local-governments-must-act/

  52. Festus

    I’m out. Newly vegan Judi made me a giant bltc sammich that I need to chow. Best wishes, Friends!

    • Pope Jimbo

      Vegan girls. Always making you beet your meat.

  53. The Late P Brooks

    I have to admit I know nothing about the car repair industry, but I have to think that a young man who likes working on cars would find that the world is his oyster if he started a small shop that simply did honest work.

    I wouldn’t want to try it. Too many computers, too much proprietary software.

    I’m not sure how much longer people are going to be able to get away with making a living bypassing that crap, either.

    • kbolino

      Despite generally knowing how to fix (or how to figure out how to fix) most “computer problems”, I refuse to do IT work for random people anymore. They know nothing but think they know everything and I usually end up at a point where I’d rather not deal with them at all than take the money. If you know what the problem is and how to fix it, you don’t need me. And if you don’t know, then you’re paying me for my expertise as much as for my time. And just because I use Google doesn’t mean I don’t know anything and you could have done that on your own (then why didn’t you?). Knowing what to Google is itself a skill, and so is knowing how to interpret what you find, and having the requisite background knowledge to fill in gaps or skip over unnecessary or counterproductive steps (of course, that can also be a weakness, not everything needs to be second-guessed). And then there’s the random gotchas and submarine expectations they have, like “I really need that thing that you removed” when that thing was the source of the problem, or at least removing it helped narrow down the cause. If I can’t tear your computer down to the bare parts (not that I always need to) as I would do with one of my own computers, then I can’t fix it as well. But if that’s what it takes, it’s going to take a lot of time and it’s probably going to make you upset (no matter how unnecessary or absurd something may seem, it’s probably part of the person’s workflow in some way).

      I can’t imagine car repair is any better.

      • Rat on a train

        I do IT support for friends and family. The primary rule is you tell me the problem and I fix how I want. You don’t like that rule, find someone else.