I Hated Meatloaf

by | Jul 6, 2021 | Family, Food & Drink, Gender, Marriage, Religion, Social Justice | 218 comments

I hated meatloaf for the first 25 years of my life. Just the thought of it made me gag. Ketchup just made it worse. Salt and pepper made it worse. Meatloaf sucked and I refused to partake.

There were those who looked at me sideways. There were those who told me was wrong. Deep down, though, even the word meatloaf churned bile in my innards.

But, you say, meatloaf can’t be all bad. Meatloaf has been around for a long time and people still eat it. Maybe it’s a bit old fashioned, but it is time tested, a great way to nourish on a budget. And besides, unless you’re a vegan, meatloaf has what you want. It’s basically a meatball casserole, and who can say no to that?

It’s true, I respond, I do like meatballs. But meatloaf is a step too far. Meatballs are a taste of goodness, but meatloaf is too restrictive. It’s a meal, not a component. I can have meatballs with rice. I can have meatballs with spaghetti. I can have meatballs with a sauce. Meatloaf is a meal unto itself. Maybe you can add a side or some vegetables to complement it and lighten it up, but once you go meatloaf, you’re pretty well stuck.

Besides, the meatloaf itself is just not appealing. You’re locked into a lump of overcooked ground meat, pooling grease and bits on the plate. You’re stuck with a chew that doesn’t quite make it to chewy and doesn’t get all the way to mealy, but sits halfway in between. You’re forced into a seasoning profile that pairs well with nothing, resulting in the rest of the plate desperately attempting to cleanse the palate of that heavy, dark slop.

I know I’m not alone. The other unmeatloafed people I’ve encountered are similarly scarred from the attempts at forcing it on them. The meatloaf oppressors are everywhere, too! The media is constantly pushing their outdated pro-meatloaf views. People are absorbed in a meatloaf false consciousness, pretending to love a downright bigoted meal. The victims of that horror food are often the most vocal proponents of their continued oppression. Meatloaf is baked into their essence. It is their identity. They have been co-opted for the continued power of meatloaf, and they are so fragile. Meatloaf fragility often turned to meatloaf rage as I peeled back at the power structures of our meatloafarchy. People don’t like their power being challenged, nor do meat based casseroles.

However, like all who stand against the oppressors, I was forced to confront my own weakness. It was a dark, dark day when I was served a cut of meatloaf at a family gathering. It looked different than what I remembered. Gone was the pool of grease. Gone were the gray strands of beef. This meatloaf tempted my unmeatloafed soul. But I was strong. I was going to beat this tiny colonizer taking the land of the native green beans and creamed corn. This will not stand!

Yet there it beckoned. It looked so soft and inviting. And, after all, how rude would it be to not at least take a bite of that which was served to me…. No! I mustn’t! My weakness cannot allow me to cave to the meatloaf hierarchy!

Just a small bite. Experience the oppression once more. Just a mote. Nobody can fault me. This is exactly what we fight against. I can’t blame myself for being a victim again. Just one bite.

As the fork floated toward my mouth, carrying that most vile payload, my mind flooded with both dread and curiosity. Myriad memories relived, a thousand compelled bites into those disquieting slabs of meat mush. But there was also a primal draw. Maybe this is how it is supposed to be. Maybe this is even natural. Maybe meatloaf is good.

Perish the thought! My weakness would not relegate me to mere unmeatloafer ally! I will not succumb to the shackles of our meatloaf centered society! With a defiant scowl and a hopefully unnoticed cringe, I plunged that damnable bite into my maw. And with a quick chew it spilled it’s detestable sensation onto my tastebuds. I had done it, I was a victim again, and through my pain I would emerge victor!

But wait, something wasn’t right. The chew. The chew was all wrong. And the flavors. Was that a hint of sage? This wasn’t heavy; this wasn’t mealy. It was light and well balanced… What sorcery is this? Is this false consciousness? Is this the final victory of my oppressors? I had to know.

Another bite was quickly shoveled in for inspection. Might this actually be good? Meatloaf can be pleasant? But so much of my life, my identity, the foundation of everything I know was rooted in the evil disgusting nature of that meatloaf menace. This couldn’t be! How can this be?

No! No! I won’t believe it! This isn’t meatloaf. This is something else. This is a meatball. But it came out of a pan. This is some sort of exotic plate with a name that is hardly pronounceable. They just call it meatloaf because of their internalized oppression. I really must find out what this really is. It is quite good.

“This is great!” a moment of weakness allowed the compliment to escape my mouth. “Can I have the recipe?” Damn it all! My weak soul caved to the meatloaf hegemony. I was a hypocrite.

A glance at the recipe book confirmed what I already knew. “Classic Meatloaf Recipe”. I was a sellout. I was, at best, going to be an unmeatloafer ally, because I actually liked meatloaf. I wasn’t going to live out my passion. At best, I’d be a Twitter meatloaf justice warrior.

Then, a wave of anger. Meatloaf wouldn’t take this away from me! It won’t gaslight my experiences. Those putrid pans served to me in my childhood. I grasped those memories with a fury. Meatloaf. Is. Evil. I will do what I must to destroy the power meatloaf has over society. This affront cannot be permitted to stand!

I recoiled in a moment of self-reflection. The anger, the rage, did it go too far? Am I such an angry, loathsome person? No. I am not wrong. Meatloaf is wrong. MEATLOAF IS WRONG! I may only be an unmeatloafer ally, but I’ll make sure that I’m the best, most vocal, most active antimeatloafer that ever existed. It doesn’t matter that I like to eat the infernal stuff. I. WILL. DESTROY. MEATLOAF.

The resoluteness of my statement resonated in my mind as I sat down with a second helping of Nanna’s meatloaf, fork scooping another devil’s bite of that dark meal. This scourge, it will be stopped. I hate meatloaf.

About The Author

trshmnstr

trshmnstr

I stink, therefore I am.

218 Comments

  1. UnCivilServant

    Tell us how you really feel.

  2. PieInTheSky

    Ketchup just made it worse – just like any other food?

    • Francisco d'Anconia

      WRONG!

  3. Animal

    My Mom used to make meat loaf a lot, and it was tasty. She used tomato paste with her own blend of seasonings instead of ketchup on top.

    But then when I was a little tad, Mom left me with my Grandpa for a day while she took Grandma to Cedar Rapids to do some shopping. When I asked what was for lunch, Grandpa told me “meat loaf.” At lunch time, he took a two-pound pack of ground beef, stuck it in a skillet, and let it cook through. We sliced it up and ate it with leftover fried potatoes.

    Because I had the coolest Grandpa in existence, at the time I thought it was pretty great.

  4. PieInTheSky

    meatloaf is not really a thing round here but hey meat is meat

  5. Toxteth O'Grady

    “Meatloaf, smeatloaf, double-beatloaf. I hate meatloaf.” https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0085334/mediaviewer/rm262070017 (eh, not “little piggy” scene but close enough)

    Call it terrine de boeuf haché.

    Actually I do have to make meatloaf for someone; how fatty do I want the ground beef?

    • Mojeaux

      how fatty do I want the ground beef?

      I use 70/30 for everything and just drain the grease really really really well.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Danke. (I bought 80-20; oops?)

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Nope, your fine

      • R C Dean

        Probably better, actually. The biggest challenge with meatloaf is the grease doesn’t have anywhere to go in the classic meatloaf pan. Mrs. Dean cooks it on a broiling pan so the grease can drain.

      • Nephilium

        I’ve got a specialty meatloaf pan that has two layers. Bottom layer can work like a regular loaf pan, the top layer has drainage slots in the bottom to allow the grease to drain out.

        Local brewery also has an amazing grilled meatloaf sandwich.

      • The Hyperbole

        There was a diner, now defunct, where we use to eat lunch almost everyday, Monday the special was always meatloaf, Tuesday special was meatloaf sandwich (if they had leftovers) Tuesday lunches were better than Monday’s. Thursday hamloaf, I ordered a cheeseburger on Thursdays.

      • l0b0t

        OMG! Where do you find 70/30? 80/20 is the best we have at the markets here; unless you want pay through the nose for a butcher to blend you some to your liking.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      80/20 is good

  6. Mojeaux

    You’re forced into a seasoning profile that pairs well with nothing

    Worchestershire sauce makes it.

    Also, I thought meatloaf was the savory version of fruitcake? Nobody admits to liking it, but a few people actually do.

  7. Sean

    Phrases I’ve never said:

    “I’ll have the meatloaf.”
    “I’m gonna make some meatloaf.”
    “Pass the meatloaf, that looks good.”

    And never shall say.

    • R C Dean

      Sad.

      I have ordered meatloaf in restaurants. I have asked for meatloaf at home. I haven’t made it in years, because Mrs. Dean makes it better than I do.

      • Sean

        *shrug*

        I have an aversion to it, similar to Trashy. Childhood trauma? Visually unappealing? I’m not sure where it stems from.

        I’m also on the no ketchup bandwagon.

      • Sensei

        Scrapple – yeah or neigh?

      • Sean

        I don’t recall ever having it, and no interest in getting it.

        So, neigh.

      • wdalasio

        Scrapple is absolutely heavenly. I actually got my wife to like it. It’s best with apple butter.

      • R C Dean

        ☝☝?

      • DEG

        Scrapple is food of the Gods.

      • Sensei

        Thin sliced.

        There’s no hope for folks that like it thick.

  8. Master JaimeRoberto (royal we/us)

    You were right at the beginning of the article. Meat loaf is terrible.

  9. Sensei

    Slice it and pan fry the slices with butter.

  10. Yusef drives a Kia

    I like meatloaf, a hella good performer,

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Now I want a cold meatloaf sammich.

    • EvilSheldon

      Nothing crushes a hangover like a cold meatloaf sandwich.

  12. zwak

    After 50 years, my reasoning stands.

    Ketchup makes the world a worse place.

  13. CatchTheCarp

    I generally like meatloaf – if it’s made right. The loaf should be well seasoned and contain bits of finely chopped onion and celery. It should hold its shape when sliced and not fall apart. No ketchup or tomato sauce on top of it – that ruins it. Meatloaf should be served with mashed potatoes and gravy. Left over meatloaf makes a great sandwich, too.

    • Suthenboy

      ^This one gets it.^

      • Bobarian LMD

        Where is the egg?

        Also, a light application of Heinz 57 vice ketchup/catsup makes a meatloaf much better.

        It’s about the only way I like H57. Will not use on a steak.

      • Fourscore

        I’m on that bandwagon. Mrs F does not make it with the potatoes, dry, heavy. Need onions (as an extender), bread crumbs, tomato in some form, lots of brown gravy and taters

  14. rhywun

    I like a good meatloaf but the one I made the other night… ugh, I’m not sure if I’m going to finish it or toss it.

    It came out way too dry and just smelling it kind of makes me gag. I mean, it tastes sort of good but it’s quite unappealing anyway.

    • Not Adahn

      Slice, then batter or egg-wash and pan-fry.

  15. The Late P Brooks

    I haven’t made it for a long time, but I have been known to make meatloaf using half beef and half pork.

    • R C Dean

      Ding ding.

      Also, half bison and half pork works a treat.

    • Sean

      Wrap it in bacon and stop calling it meatloaf.

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      Sounds good: apparently Italians call that polpettone.

    • Nephilium

      Our local stores sell the meatloaf blend, which is approximately equal parts of beef, pork, and veal (currently running ~$5/lb).

      • Not Adahn

        Here it’s cheaper than either ground beef or ground pork.

    • rhywun

      Mine was that 1/3 beef, 1/3 veal, 1/3 pork package you find in the supermarket. I don’t think I mixed them adequately. It was all lumpy and falling apart.

    • EvilSheldon

      That does sound good.

    • Tulip

      1/2 beef, 1/2 pork, bake it on a broiler pan. I use onions, bell pepper, garlic, cornflakes and an egg. No tomato sauce. Seasoning includes Worcestershire sauce. It’ll never be my favorite, but once or twice a year I make it.

  16. waffles

    When meatloaf said “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that”. What is the thing he wouldn’t do? I was unwittingly subjected to the music video for the first time and I still couldn’t figure it out.

    • Mojeaux

      That = whatever you won’t do for love.

      • waffles

        Clears it up completely, thanks.

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        From Wiki

        Meat Loaf says that the question, “What is ‘that’?” is one of the most popular questions he is asked.[5]

        Each verse mentions two things that the man would do for love, followed by one thing that he will not do. The title phrase repetition reasserts that he “won’t do that.” Each mention of “that” is a reference to the particular promise that he made earlier in the same verse.[6] The four things he says he will never do are:

        “forget the way you feel right now”
        “forgive myself if we don’t go all the way tonight”
        “do it better than I do it with you”
        “stop dreaming of you every night of my life”
        At the song’s conclusion, the woman predicts two things that he will do: “You’ll see that it’s time to move on”, and “You’ll be screwing around.” To both of these, the male emphatically responds, “I won’t do that!”

        In his 1998 VH1 Storytellers special, Meat Loaf even explained it on stage using a blackboard and a pointing stick.[6] In a 1993 promotional interview, Steinman states that the definition of “that” is fully revealed in the song in each of the several verses in which it is mentioned. This sense might have been more clear if the lyric had been “and I won’t do that” instead of “but I won’t do that.” It is possibly the use of “but” instead of “and” that leads to the ambiguity.

        It sort of is a little puzzle and I guess it goes by – but they’re all great things. ‘I won’t stop doing beautiful things and I won’t do bad things.’ It’s very noble. I’m very proud of that song because it’s very much like out of the world of Excalibur. To me, it’s like Sir Lancelot or something – very noble and chivalrous. That’s my favorite song on the record – it’s very ambitious.[7][8]

      • Mojeaux

        I call shenanigans.

        The “but” isn’t ambiguous.

      • Bobarian LMD

        The Butt?

      • Mojeaux

        I ALMOST put “but(t)”.

      • Not Adahn

        If you’re non-binary, doesn’t that mean you have an ambiguous butt?

      • Mojeaux

        Well, it’s like “Hotel California”. I always thought it was about addiction, but other people had other ideas. (We shall not discuss that the evangelicals thought it was Satan stuff.)

        Whatever monkey is on your back is what you can check out from but never leave.

      • waffles

        I assumed it what meant to be literal, they are literally trapped and no one is helping.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It can be both literal and allegorical at the same time.

        *nods head towards the article*

        Generally, though, I ignore song lyrics. They’re usually not half as deep and revelatory as people make them out to be, and they’re often just thinly veiled euphemisms for sex or drug use. Doesn’t help that I don’t retain lyrics in my head very well, so I’m usually looking them up post hoc because somebody tells me how deep and revelatory they are.

      • rhywun

        Same here. I like having access to them so I can sing along but otherwise I don’t read anything into them at all.

      • Suthenboy

        Right. You might as well try reading tea leaves.

      • R C Dean

        Ambiguity leaves space for the reader/listener.

        Not enough people understand this, IMO.

      • TARDis

        I agree. Ambiguity in songs, especially love songs makes it easier to make a song “yours”.

      • Bobarian LMD

        See 1st season of Lost or the only Matrix movie for successful examples.

      • Mojeaux

        See also: Inception.

      • BakedPenguin

        Well, it’s like “Hotel California”. I always thought it was about addiction…

        I thought so, too, but a couple of their members came out and said that wasn’t true, it was just about living in CA, allegedly.

        I thought Chicago’s 25 or 6 to 4 was about an acid (or some other psychedelic) trip. Turns out they were just sitting in someone’s apartment trying to write a final song demanded by their label for their first album. They then wrote the best song they’d ever do, so good for them.

        Neither of these songs has meatloaf, so we’re both off topic now.

      • Sensei

        I thought so, too, but a couple of their members came out and said that wasn’t true, it was just about living in CA, allegedly.

        That’s what I’ve always assumed. Essentially the CA hard living lifestyle of the time.

      • Not Adahn

        But who are the hosts and who are The Guests?

      • waffles

        I figured it was pegging or something.

      • EvilSheldon

        Psshh. No way is Meat Loaf that vanilla…

    • zwak

      Canabalism.

  17. l0b0t

    The Nellie Deli, a 24 hour bodega in NOLA’s French Quarter was a regular stumble home from work drunk type of spot. Meatloaf (crusty ends please) and double mac & cheese for the sides was my regular order. It came with a big hunk of Leidenheimer French bread. I’d grill that bread on the flat top, slather it with mayonnaise and hot sauce and make a meatloaf sammich fit for the gods.

  18. wdalasio

    Ketchup just made it worse.

    Of course it did. Ketchup always makes everything worse.

    Good meatloaf, in a good brown gravy, on the other hand, is great. But, I suspect it’s not all that easy to make genuinely good meatloaf. Too easy to get dry or fatty.

    • waffles

      Worcestershire sauce is acceptable to save blandloaf

      • Mojeaux

        That is the key ingredient. And white onions.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Once you have a brown gravy, aren’t you in Salisbury steak territory?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      And cook it in a pellet grill.

      It’s a winner every time.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        And now I know what I’m cooking tomorrow

      • TARDis

        Looks great. When’s dinner?

        Also, what is the “minced meat”?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Usually a mix of ground pork and beef. You can add some sausage in it as well but too much and it gets really salty.

      • TARDis

        Ok, thanks. I will try it sometime.

      • Not Adahn

        Hoover’s on Manor Rd (pronounced MAYner) had a meatloaf baked in their smoker.

        It was pretty boss.

  19. BakedPenguin

    I don’t know – Bat Out Of Hell was okay.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      Didnt we learn our lesson about eating bats released from malevolent facilities?

    • Tundra

      It was, but when was the last time you took it out for a spin?

      Some things are best left as fond memories.

      • BakedPenguin

        Agreed. Like the dish itself, it doesn’t age well.

    • The Hyperbole

      He was alright on Free-for-All as well.

  20. Certified Public Asshat

    Meatloaf is a meal unto itself. Maybe you can add a side or some vegetables to complement it and lighten it up, but once you go meatloaf, you’re pretty well stuck.

    I’ve never had meatloaf without mashed potatoes and a green vegetable.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      I lied, plenty of times my mom served buttered corn instead of a green vegetable.

  21. BakedPenguin

    Seriously, though, mom made meatloaf when I was a kid. It was okay. Just pour ketchup until you can’t taste it anymore.

  22. kinnath

    I used to make meatloaf all the time when the kids were still at home. Always made baked beans and scalloped potatoes at the same time.. I mean, if you’re gonna turn on the oven, might as well use it.

    • R C Dean

      See, that’s how you comfort food.

  23. Tundra

    I like a well-prepared meatloaf. Especially the leftovers – cold of course.

    Bacon in the mix can also be a wonderful thing.

  24. Mojeaux

    I’m going to have a Reuben sandwich for lunch.

    • waffles

      Do all reuben sandwiches use thousand island dressing or is that something weird local to my experience?

      • Mojeaux

        No, I use thousand island, although I will use Russian dressing if I can get it.

        Worst Reuben I ever had was in NY and they put mustard on it. I was appalled. Now, I love mustard. I really do. And I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.

      • Bobarian LMD

        With mustard, it is just a corned beef on rye. Russian dressing is the right answer.

      • Mojeaux

        ??

      • prolefeed

        Nobody sells Russian dressing around here, so I substitute Thousand Island.

        I make my own Reubens with mustard, Thousand Island, spicy BBQ sauce, sauerkraut, Swiss cheese, dill pickles, and rye or pumpernickel bread. Maybe that’s actually a corned beef sammidge, but it’s damn tasty.

  25. The Other Kevin

    Like you, meatloaf is one thing I hated as a kid. But I’ve found better ways to prepare it (sorry, mom!) and now I love it. Same with any number of things – brussels sprouts, asparagus, and mashed potatoes come to mind. I guess growing up in the Midwest before you could just Google a recipe had its drawbacks.

    • rhywun

      Yeah, my mom – bless her soul – was not a great everyday cook.

      She rocked Thanksgiving and Christmas, though.

    • banginglc1

      Brussel Sprouts taste better to you now because they ARE better now.

    • Suthenboy

      I would never touch either one of those.

      • Sensei

        I owned a LR once. I bought it knowing the issues and was OK with it.

        That said I’ve never had a car in the shop so much as that one.

      • Tundra

        I met a guy who has several old ones. They are actually pretty simple and reliable.

    • Tundra

      It ain’t just them. Ever wonder why $100K luxury cars lose 60 percent of their value in just a few years?

      Fucking Mercedes requires that new headlight assemblies be programmed at the dealership.

      Stupid complexity.

      • Sensei

        From my favorite independent mechanic’s website. Today’s video.

        GM’s Joke Of The Day

      • Tundra

        That is a fucking joke.

        Although I just spent $50 on the LED assembly in my freezer. Not sure what was wrong with a 2 dollar bulb…

    • Gustave Lytton

      I would take a prefuckover Wolf, but I’d never mistake it for a reliable daily driver.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    “Holy cow, I think he’s gonna make it!”

  27. The Late P Brooks

    When meatloaf said “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that”. What is the thing he wouldn’t do?

    Get married?

    Oh, wait- that was me.

  28. TARDis

    I like my wife’s meatloaf. I don’t eat a lot of ground beef dishes, because I would rather just have a good house-burger. (50/50 chuck/bison)

    Sometimes her meatloaf is too moist even when crisp enough on the outside. Then it’s not firm enough for a clean slice. I like to have meatloaf sammies as leftovers, so being able to slice it thinly is important.

    As far the ketchup on top, it needs cayenne, a touch of brown sugar, and apple cider vinegar.

    Also, bacon.

    • The Hyperbole

      I like to have meatloaf sammies as leftovers, so being able to slice it thinly is important.

      This makes absolutely no sense what-so-ever. The slab of meatloaf in a meatloaf sammich should be 1/2″ thick at least.

      • TARDis

        To clarify, 1/2 to 3/4 inch is thinly sliced.

      • Not Adahn

        And fried.

  29. Francisco d'Anconia

    You’re completely nuts, trsh. Meatloaf is teh awesumz!

    Cranberry sauce, OTOH…

  30. J. Frank Parnell

    Back around 1999 I was working for a broadband ISP that did mostly DSL lines, with a few T1s and a handful of legacy ISDN lines. One day some guy calls in saying his ISDN line is down. I check it out, don’t see any issues on our end, so I tell him I’ll get a ticket open with the telco. Later I’m talking to my boss about it, since ISDN issues were pretty rare
    Boss: Which customer was it?
    Me: Mike Aday
    Boss: Oh yeah, that’s Meatloaf
    Me: … what? Really?

    Anyways, as far as the food goes, I haven’t made meatloaf in a while, but when I did the best part was usually having the leftovers for breakfast with some over-medium (yolk still a bit runny) eggs and a bunch of hot sauce.

  31. kinnath

    The local diner sells at Meatloaf Melt sandwich — Swiss and American cheese, grilled onions and BBQ on grilled sourdough. This and a basket of onion rings, and you’re golden.

    Now I’m gonna have to go there tonight.

  32. Tres Cool

    Trashy, if you ever dine @ Chez Tres, I can guarantee the meatloaf is ketchup-free

    • Francisco d'Anconia

      Ew!

  33. The Late P Brooks

    Godfrey Daniel!

    Today’s workout- mounting the Yokohama Geolander tires (in excellent condition) I picked up on craigslist the other day. Talk about yer unsprung weight; we haz it. This wheel and tire combination is heavier than Godzilla’s left nut. They won’t float away.

    At least dismounting the old tires wasn’t too bad, for once.

    • kinnath

      I have been using the Geolanders on my SUVs for more than a decade. I love them.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    Generally, though, I ignore song lyrics. They’re usually not half as deep and revelatory as people make them out to be, and they’re often just thinly veiled euphemisms for sex or drug use.

    Cues up “My Dingaling”.

    • R C Dean

      They’re usually not half as deep and revelatory as people make them out to be

      Well, consider the source. Musicians, amirite?

    • EvilSheldon

      hugs his Prog and Post-Rock albums

      Shhh, it’s alright, guys, he wasn’t talking about you…

    • Sensei

      Who knew?

    • kinnath

      wtf

  35. Gender Traitor

    I choose to remain neutral on the meatloaf question. My mother made passable meatloaf, and while it’s usually not my first choice, I’ve occasionally ordered it at restaurants with no dire consequences that I recall. (Kinnath’s diner’s version sounds delicious!) I don’t think I’ve ever tried to make it myself.

    What I want to know about is beef liver. My mother despised beef liver, so she never cooked it, and I’ve never had the opportunity or the nerve to try it when dining out. Should I accept the wisdom of my mother’s teaching, or should I take the chance that beef liver might become my new favorite food?

    • Gender Traitor

      P.S. I believe I’ve heard that liver sometimes comes covered with bacon, so…

    • R C Dean

      You can try it, but my experience is that your mother was right.

    • Tundra

      Liver is a tough one. Usually people have a pretty strong reaction to it one way or the other.

      Good nutrients, but I prefer it in a ground beef mixture or desiccated in capsule form.

      • Mojeaux

        I see what you did there.

      • blackjack

        If you get bad liver, are the consequences dier?

    • Not Adahn

      It tastes remarkably like chicken livers, if you like those.

      • prolefeed

        Chicken livers plus chicken hearts are great in cajun dirty rice. Haven’t tried dirty rice with beef liver, but I’d think it would be tasty if spiced right.

      • Animal

        The best way to eat chicken livers:

        1) Buy chicken livers.
        2) Let chicken livers sit out in the sun for at least a week.
        3) Use chicken livers as bait to catch delicious catfish.
        4) Eat delicious catfish.

    • TARDis

      No liver for me please. I just don’t like the texture. My German mother loved the stuff, along with things like tartar. Barf! My dad tolerated it for her sake. So we got to tolerate it too. For the most part you can have all the organs unless they are put in to hot dogs or whatever.

      I think I told the anecdote about my mom and step-dad missing out on $5k prepaid 2 week trip to Italy, because they ate liver at a chain restaurant. She said Denny’s, but I never saw that on the menu. They didn’t even make home before the puking began.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I love liver. Chop some up and mix it in your rice to get a flavorful dirty rice or add it to your ragu.

  36. Jerms

    A question for you wise people. Last week i mentioned in the links that my daughters friend fell off of a golf cart i got for my daughters for Christmas. Girl was hurt really bad, very lucky shes not paralyzed. The thing only goes about 12 mph but she must have fallen right on her head. (Nobody actually saw what happened they were facing forward while she was on the back.
    Fortunately it sounds like shes going to be ok and make a full recovery-and thats the most important thing. Im expecting to get sued, and im not sure what to expect. If my homeowners insurance doesnt cover this (i dont think they will) is it possible to lose my house? Does anyone know how that stuff works?

    • Mojeaux

      Yikes. I have no advice, but good luck.

    • R C Dean

      Unless you have set up some form of asset protection (family trust or the like), your assets are exposed. Its too late now to try to shelter assets, BTW. Not my area of expertise, but your “homestead” is generally protected in bankruptcy, but I think varies by state.

      Whether you have any insurance that might apply, I couldn’t say.

      Might not be a bad idea to find a defense lawyer now and see what, if anything, you can do to prepare.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      is it possible to lose my house?

      Sorry to hear that this happened. It sounds awful.

      There are limits on what they can take from you, but you really don’t want to get to a point where you figure out what those limits are.

      I’m not a personal injury lawyer, so I can’t speak on the specifics of what to expect. The one thing I will say is that your insurance company is not on your side. Don’t trust them to fight for your interests.

      • R C Dean

        The one thing I will say is that your insurance company is not on your side.

        As someone who pretty much runs an insurance company, I can confirm this.

      • Jerms

        Should i hire a lawyer or should i wait to see if there is even going to be a lawsuit first?

      • R C Dean

        Depends on what you think the odds are you will be sued. If you’re pretty sure, might as well get ready.

        I’m thinking of a pretty small upfront investment, if you decide to get one now. Initial meeting (which they might not even charge for) to lay out what happened, and a conversation about what, if anything, you need to do before the complaint drops, and an overview of how things might go (up to and including post-verdict bankruptcy as one of the possible outcomes). They might also want to look at your insurance policies. Shouldn’t be that big an expense up front, and it might buy you some peace of mind that at least you are prepared and better informed.

      • Jerms

        Ok. I guess i’ll get ready. Thank you for the advice.

      • R C Dean

        *sends Jerms bill*

        Good luck.

        I’m hoping the neighbors decide not to go to court over this. I have no clue what your net worth is, or what they could actually collect, but most people are functionally judgment-proof (outside of any insurance that might pay). Plaintiff’s lawyers don’t take cases against people unless they can make a profit. And that means what they can actually recover has to hit a certain level.

      • kinnath

        but most people are functionally judgment-proof

        kinnath for most of his life.

        kinnath now . . . let’s see . . . house, multiple cars, 401ks . . .

        Perhaphs we should get that umbrella liability policy going.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Dean is right. Also, I assume this maxim applies equally from the med mal context that “it was scary for a few days, but there is no lasting damage” doesn’t play particularly well in front of juries when asking for large sums of money.

      • Sensei

        kinnath – ask OJ about 401k plans.

        Usually retirement funds are firewalled.

        My experience is that whoever is paying for the medical is going to want something and they have an army of lawyers both inside and outside.

      • R C Dean

        I think 401(k) accounts are shielded from liability claims, but again, not my area of expertise. Most state homestead laws protect your house and at least one car (see previous caveat).

        Umbrella policies are usually pretty cheap, though. Not a bad idea to carry one. As always, make sure you understand what it covers (and excludes).

        Also, look into asset protection strategies – family trusts and LLCs can be helpful. AZ offers less than total protection for your house, so ours is inside an LLC, which makes us pretty much judgment-proof if the insurance is exhausted.

        Quicky look at homestead protections.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        so ours is inside an LLC,

        If we’re ever in the same place, I’ll buy the drinks if you explain the asset strategy in detail.

      • Sensei

        RC Dean.

        Umbrella policies are generally a good deal. I recommend them for most people who have assets they want to protect.

      • kinnath

        Post something; learn something.

      • R C Dean

        “it was scary for a few days, but there is no lasting damage” doesn’t play particularly well in front of juries when asking for large sums of money.

        It actually plays decently well, at least in most courts (there are areas of the country where all it takes to win a big judgment is filing a lawsuit). The plaintiff has to point to something for damages. “I was skeert” generally doesn’t get much. Without a permanent injury of some kind, its really, really hard to get a big sum.

      • R C Dean

        I’ll buy the drinks if you explain the asset strategy in detail.

        Our “liquid” assets (including IRAs, Roth IRAs and other retirement savings) are buried deep in a tax shelter – currently a charitable LLC, to flip to a charitable trust in probably 2 – 3 years. Our hard assets (at this point, the home) is titled to an LLC set up for asset protection.

        I couldn’t really go into much more detail – I hired lawyers for all this, and pretty much signed what they put in front of me. I’d start by looking at family LLCs (also handy for estate planning).

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I learned that one the hard way.

    • Sensei

      In addition to what our Glib counsel have noted.

      Homeowners’ form excludes motor vehicles. So hopefully you had insurance on the cart. Better still an umbrella policy.

      At the very least the person who was injured health insurance is going to want to subrogate against your insurer assuming you have one.

  37. banginglc1

    My mother’s meat loaf is a gift from God. My meatloaf is ok. Most others are somewhere in between.

    And ketchup does ruin everything.

  38. Bobarian LMD

    “Meatloaf” is just a metaphor for communism.

    Right?

    This is like Animal Farm.

  39. blackjack

    Meat is generally really good. I see no reason to make it into a loaf. Bread seems to need loafing, meats already comes in an acceptable form.

    • banginglc1

      Do you like sandwiches? Essentially meatloaf is just a sandwich in a different configuration.

    • prolefeed

      ^^^ This. Meatloaf is poor people’s food, cutting hamburger with a cheaper filler, aka crappy bread. Cook the meat unsullied, and make a sammidge with good bread.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Live where pretentious and crappy food is king, I’ll gladly take good poor person food.

      • R C Dean

        There are a lot of dishes that started life as po’ people food. Doesn’t mean they can’t be delicious when made with good ingredients by a good cook.

      • Sensei

        Yup!

        I don’t like sushi in any way, but that’s a great example of working class food from the the docks. I seem to recall Colonial US indentured servitude contracts that limited how much lobster could be served to indentured servants.

      • kinnath

        I didn’t fix meatloaf because we were poor.

        Meatloaf is one of many fix-once-eat-many-meals recipes that working couples use to keep their kids and themselves fed during the work week.

        And besides, few people are crazy enough to grill burgers (the only way to make burgers) outdoors in January in Iowa.

    • limey

      I still don’t understand “gamergate”.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Videogame journalists took to demonizing their core audience in favor of preferred SJW classes. Gamers got really pissed off and lashed out online. Videogame journalists responded by demonizing them some more.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Also, undeclared conflicts of interest.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I think most people underestimate the brouhaha because the vastly underestimate the size of the US videogame market, which in 2020 was $65B.

        By comparison, the entire US movie market is typically half of that or less.

      • Not Adahn

        Yes-ish.

        It was that vidya journos AND forum owners/moderators AND basically everyone in the para-videogame industry (and a good deal of those directly employed in the industry) were all in the same closed, groupthinky clique. And demonstrated it.

        Anyone who tells you it was about whatsercunt fucking some editor doesn’t understand it (willfully or no). She was one of many lolcows who would semi-regularly have ninety minutes of scandal.

        What Gamergate was the simultaneous decision made across ALL major videogame sites that you couldn’t discuss whatercunt, and nuking anyone that tried.

      • R C Dean

        I think what Gamergate showed was how deeply wokism was penetrating corporate America, even back then. I didn’t see it as a harbinger, but it was.

      • Not Adahn

        For fun, see if someone archived the Atheism+ forums. And then realize when that existed.

      • limey

        I was told there was a stunning and brave lone person who menstruates video game developer/writer/something who was cruelly torn asunder by the violence of patriarchal and toxically masculine ghouls who attacked them completely unprovoked and they was completely reasonable and gracious and they did nothing to provoke such an attack on they.

      • Not Adahn

        Chelsea had to outdo Becky Watson who was assaulted by an invitation to go out for coffee… while in an elevator!

      • Bobarian LMD

        This is how you mansplain something.

  40. Aloysious

    I like meat loaf. Especially with an apricot glaze.

  41. Timeloose

    I don’t like meatloaf with chunks of crunchy stuff in it. Those onions, peppers, or whatever, better be so thin that they soften while cooking. Better yet they should be softened first or put in as a powder.

    Same goes for burgers and meatballs.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Yes. Either cook them and soften them or give a few whirls in the food processor before combining.

  42. Ownbestenemy

    Got dinged by the HOA for the trailer. I think the saving grace is we have no advertisement/business name on it. However, do you think it wise to request that any future violations include proof from the HOA that it has exceeded the allowed time period of 48-hours without moving?

    “Parking of recreational vehicles, watercraft and trailers within the Community is restricted by City of Henderson ordinance and other related rules and ordinances. Recreational vehicles (RVs), watercraft and trailersmay be parked onpublic streets pursuant to City of Henderson code but may not be parked within the Community for a period exceeding forty-eight (48) hours withoutbeing moved.”

    That is both a city (we are on a public street, not gated) and community rule.

    I am thinking that any future pictures need to show it has not moved. Mainly doing this because the pictures we have received from them are one-offs and mid-day on a Thursday or Friday (when most people are bringing their trailers out to go off camping).

    • Sensei

      The HOA likely has deeper pocket than you do.

      I’d think you’d be better off with your own version of proof. What does the HOA do for dispute resolution?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Eh.. I missed the hearing..oh well. I think I will say it is resolved. We do have a storage spot for it, but sometimes it is in front of the house (our driveway, not blocking neighbors or parking spaces) for a night.

        Usually this pictures are when my wife swings back home for lunch and they snap the photo. Which is odd considering it could be a maintenance man or something.

      • R C Dean

        I’d think you’d be better off with your own version of proof.

        This. Something as easy as the work schedule should do the trick. Worst case, you might need to get a few clients to confirm that, yes, the trailer was at their house on X day.

      • Ownbestenemy

        True. Can’t do work schedule because then it falls into a whole other set of rules. I have a few ideas and I will just say it is resolved with the storage spot and will not exceed a 48-hour period when it is in front of the house.

      • Sean

        GPS tracking unit, get one.

      • R C Dean

        will not exceed a 48-hour period when it is in front of the house.

        Even if it doesn’t, you’ll want to be able to prove it. I like the GPS tracker idea.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Same. That way when we get a notice I will dump the tracker data and say shove it.

  43. juris imprudent

    Let’s change the beat a little.

  44. pistoffnick

    I like meatloaf:

    OK, here we go, we got a real pressure cooker going here,
    Two down, nobody on, no score, bottom of the ninth,
    There’s the windup, and there it is, a line shot up the middle,
    Look at him go. This boy can really fly! He’s rounding first and really
    Turning it on now, he’s not letting up at all, he’s gonna try for
    Second; the ball is bobbled out in center, and here comes the
    Throw, and what a throw! He’s gonna slide in head first, here he
    Comes, he’s out! No, wait, safe-safe at second base, this kid
    Really makes things happen out there. Batter steps up to the
    Plate, here’s the pitch-he’s going, and what a jump he’s got,
    He’s trying for third, here’s the throw, it’s in the dirt-safe at
    Third! Holy cow, stolen base! He’s taking a pretty big lead out
    There, almost daring him to try and pick him off. The pitcher
    Glances over, winds up, and it’s bunted, bunted down the third
    Base line, the suicide squeeze is on! Here he comes, squeeze
    Play, it’s gonna be close, holy cow, I think he’s gonna make it!

    • creech

      Now, if it’s a Phillies game, it’s “Herrera drives one to deep right. It’s back, it’s back, oh, it is off the wall. Herrera was admiring his supposed home run shot and trotting. Here’s the relay throw…Out at Second base.”

  45. pistoffnick

    A favorite of mine, growing up was salmon loaf. BONES AND ALL!

    • kinnath

      Salmon patties. No bones.

  46. UnCivilServant

    🙁

    The good news is I don’t have an ulcer.

    The bad news is, the doctors took one look at my CT scan and went “how has that gall bladder not burst yet?” So they want me to have it out immediately.

    I don’t currently have a way to get home from the hospital tomorrow, since I’m not supposed to drive after this outpatient procedure, which complicates things.

    • Sensei

      Sorry to read that! I’m also a wee bit far to drive you home unfortunately.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Well that sucks.

    • Not Adahn

      Did Albany legalize Uber yet? Otherwise it’s a good thing you’ve almost got your house paid off so you can take out a second mortgage and call a cab.

      • pistoffnick

        Hospital lawyers (Sorry RC Dean!) have made it so they won’t allow you to take a regular taxi or an Uber. It has to be medically certified transportation which jacks to cost up ridiculously.

      • R C Dean

        Not around here. If you don’t need medical transport (and somebody being discharged home after an outpatient procedure doesn’t), then we’ll stick you in the next vehicle that doesn’t have its doors locked.

        In a nutshell, if you can be driven by a family member, you can take a taxi or Uber. Hell, we even pay for it sometimes.

    • UnCivilServant

      I just arranged transport.

    • DEG

      Sorry.

    • Sean

      Oof. Sorry, UCS.

      Best wishes for a speedy recovery.

    • Tundra

      I’m glad they caught it before it burst. Good luck tomorrow.

      • R C Dean

        Same here. Bad news if that thing grenades while still in your gut.

  47. Ownbestenemy

    Also smoked meatloaf is fantastic, especially if you can grind your own meat.

    • Bobarian LMD

      Everything is better when your own meat is being grinded.

    • R C Dean

      if you can grind your own meat

      I prefer a lighter touch, but you do you.

    • Ownbestenemy

      ^^^ Why I love this place