“How do you do keep getting in here?” Jen shouted.
“The tunnels, the emergency skylights, that faulty teleporter they salvaged from Roswell… honestly: Who knows?” Hunter said. He did a little twirl in his outfit of T-shirt and jockstrap, his indoor soccer shoes digging into the rich pile of the Oval Office carpet.
“If you want my body,” Hunter said, sashaying toward Jen, “And you think I’m sexy, c’mon sugar, and let me know.” He began coughing and spat something dark orange into a wastebasket. Jen realized then what his t-shirt spelled out in hottest pink.
“Hunter,” Jen began.
“Yes, I’m selling them,” Hunter said, holding the shirt away from his nipple to make boobs, “I’ve got the perfect plan. And you are going to help me.”
“I, just…” Jen said.
Hunter stepped in close and licked from her clavicle to the back of her left ear. Jen shuddered and moaned. Hunter dropped to his knees and stuck his face in her sensible skirt. “I can smell how wet you are,” he growled.
“Oh, shit,” Finnegan said as she wheeled Joe into the room. Hunter ignored her in favor of snuffling Jen like a dog digging through the trash to find a tampon.
“Stop that!” Finnegan said.
Joe grabbed at his crotch with a hand curled into a claw and screamed.
“See what you did?” Finnegan yelled at her father.
“What the fuck is going on?” Hunter demanded, rubbing his feather boa up under Jen’s skirt.
Joe screamed and worked his crotch.
“He’s been like that since we got back from California,” Finnegan said. She reached down and tried to pry Joe’s hand away from his crotch and Joe screamed in her face.
“He’ll stop in a minute,” Jen gasped, shuddering again as Hunter tore a hole in the gusset of her pantyhose, his fingers delighted by her lack of underwear.
“Fucking Gavin,” Hunter said. “He shouldn’t have even needed us.”
“Aside from fingerbanging the press secretary, is there another reason you stopped by?” Finnegan asked dryly in between Joe’s wails.
Hunter finally stood up, Jen gasping again, and made a show of smelling along the length of his index finger. He finally looked past her to Joe and said, “He’s going to pull his fucking dick off.”
“I know how to take care of Grandpa!” Finnegan said.
“Look at him and say that!” Hunter shot back. He walked over to Joe and stuck his slimy finger in Joe’s mouth. He quieted and began to suck at it, pulling the entire thing into his mouth. Hunter smirked with satisfaction as Joe’s hand opened and he stopped pulling at his genitals.
“Hunter…” Jen moaned, still stunned from his knuckle-plunging.
“No teeth,” Hunter said to Joe.
“Do you like the new shirt?” Hunter asked, peacocking. “Daddy is going to mandate that everyone has to buy it.”
“Shouldn’t it be Vaccinate Me, Daddy?” Finnegan asked.
Hunter smiled, Joe still working his finger and said, “You don’t know anything about fashion.”
ohgodohgodohgod…. here we go…
*opens eyes slowly, squints carefully*
*involuntary face twitch*
Yeah, that was a rough one.
bravo. bravo…
Yeah, the two word preview meant trouble.
I knew that, and I read it all anyway.
I wonder if that means I’m a sick person.
An assault on all the senses, bravo
Wow.
I had a feeling with all the crazy energy in the world that today’s episode would be… memorable.
He did a little twirl in his outfit of T-shirt and jockstrap, his indoor soccer shoes digging into the rich pile of the Oval Office carpet.
How do you do it?
The whole thing is amazing, but that little bit at the beginning was perfect.
I don’t create so much as describe objectively.
Holy Crap!
I almost choked on my lunch.(Not a euphemism)
Good lord.
Our “first family”, ladies and gentlemen. But it was Trump’s wife who denigrated the office of president by planting some roses and picking different silverware.
Remember there’s a little girl out there whose mommy is a stripper, her daddy is a crackhead, and her grandfather is the president.
Oh boy… next week on Joemala!
His father was six feet to the left, dressed identically.
Stupid verbing nouns.
“He should have even needed us.”
Hunter slipped one by the proofreaders.
Better than an adjective that share many properties of verbs.
How about verbal adjectives in Russian?
Читаемая студентами книга = read by students book
That’s a participle. (Specifically, a present passive participle.)
Past participles function as adjectives in English: behind closed doors; a forgotten man; the unknown soldier; and so on.
It’s just that Russian has more participles than English, and you picked an uncommon one (that and past active; the examples I gave above would be past passive participles in Russian).
Participle in English, but it is actually an adjective in Russian. It has an adjectival ending that must agree with the noun. Other participle forms don’t:
Прочитав книгу = having read the book
Читая книгу = while reading the book
Too many Glib cunning linguists.
Better a cunning linguist than a smeliy russkiy khor.
I…uh…
And I was worried my article for tonight is NSFW. Good show as always.
How do you come up with this stuff? There must be something wrong with you. Thankfully.
Fuck. Knew I shouldn’t have read this after having larb gai for lunch.
Something spicy enough you don’t want it coming back up?
Honestly, my favorite was
“No teeth,” Hunter said to Joe.
That is a practiced line.
Yeah, that was priceless.
“snuffling Jen like a dog digging through the trash to find a tampon”
That is such a wonderful description.
Damn your nimble fingers! (said Jen to Hunter)
Big city folks sure do talk purty.
Hunter ignored her in favor of snuffling Jen like a dog digging through the trash to find a tampon.
I am simultaneously in awe of and repulsed by this. Why, oh why, do I always read these during my lunch hour?
I’m going to go downstairs and retch all over my electronics workbench now.
This place is special and Wednesdays are super special. A specialness of horror and wonder and revlusion.
Any connection to the reason the the libertarian party can’t gain traction?
Jimmy Weeks was ahead of his time.
Indeed. Sugarfree has the heart of a little boy.
He keeps it in a jar on his desk!
This is either the greatest or worst thing I have ever read.
I’m going with “and”.
I miss the wholesomeness of Hat & Hair and Pie.
At school. Local juco. One 19yo girl discussing the stock market and investing to 2 other 19yo girls. The girl instructing knows her stuff, although she had to pull out “buy low, sell high.” I haz a happy.
“buy low, sell high.”
I think what she really meant was “buy SP500 index fund now, hold till you die.”
In a limited way you can do both, but yeah.
What a sick mind.
“No teeth,” Hunter said to Joe.
I think I actually retched. I hope this doesn’t mean I’m homophobic. Thanks SugarFree, you’re a peach.
For trashmonster.
https://babylonbee.com/news/record-numbers-of-americans-converting-to-whatever-that-one-religion-is-that-doesnt-allow-vaccines
*applause*
I was expecting the Christian Scientists to take a hard line against it (to be fair, based more on my own biases than genuine experience), but it seems they’re neutral on the topic.
Yes, more
https://www.christianscience.com/press-room/christian-scientists-and-respect-for-the-rights-of-others2
I’m not really surprised. They’ve sought, and been successful, in getting carveouts such as deductibility of practitioner expenses or exemption from ACA requirements, rather than unilateral opposition. My feeling is that they would say all of this is part of the material world, and spiritual truth remains untouched.
Since it doesn’t say that he’s in a wheelchair, I’m assuming he’s strapped onto a furniture dolly a la The Silence of the Lambs
I assumed wheelchair, but that’s hilarious.
I guess they tied him to it after wandering off one too many times.
That and the button that lets him talk.
Wow…so on an all-hands with upper executives in the FAA.
“Do you have contingencies if large amounts of the workforce are release?”
Their answer? We basically will say good-riddance. Based on the questions received and they are answering, it sounds like they have a lot of people that are not happy with this mandate to the FedGov workers…
Yes. This is a fantastic upside of the vaccine mandates. The only thing that could cause federal workers to leave their jobs.
Only 13,000 in the FAA have attested to being vaccinated. Best estimate I have is the total of FAA workforce is 30,000+
The long spiral towards the drain continues.
“For our next trick, we’ll plunge a faltering economy into a history-changing depression!”
TR, Wilson, and FDR are only going to be seen as morningstars of the demise of the US (and the West as a whole). Obama and Biden are going to be the ones remembered for centuries to come.
How they will be remembered depends on who’s writing the histories.
This. It’s only 100 years later that FDR is being seriously looked at as a bit of a failure.
Failure because he didn’t prog harder?
Looked at as failure by whom?
Maybe nerds like us, but it’s definitely not the mainstream view.
Like I said, a “bit” of a failure.
And this is by the entire right. They fuckin’ hate him.
Q: “What if I am scheduled to retire on December 31”
A: “You will have to be vaccinated by November or be fired”
Q: “Will you recognize natural immunity”
A: “NO!”
I mean, Joe will accidentally reduce the size of the Federal Government. *claps*
The retirement one is just malicious. What’s to stop someone from going on vacation or on disability at the end of October and just coast to the end of the year? Assuming they have enough leave. Are they going to demand people provide proof during their vacations?
I don’t know; when the rubber hits the road, how many will stand firm?
Don’t even know if I will. You really don’t know until you actually have to make that decision, as not a few here already have (and there is no “right” decision other than the one that is right for the individual). But eventually, we all face the ultimate test (NSFW).
Still here, still standing,
Amazing, in multiple ways. *salutes*
I stillhave taken the sacrament, either. Management is dragging feet to see which way the wind is gonna blow. An Elder governorship would have been very helpful.
*have’nt
I get the feeling that a lot of people are looking around and seeing all the help wanted signs, and are starting to think long and hard about their current position.
But, and I will certainly say this, I have been wrong before.
*hangs up after second phone screener in 3 weeks*
What’s that about “long and hard”?
#metoo
First phone screen of the current job hunt tomorrow.
Good luck! And always build vanity examples (project templates, SOP examples, etc…) in case a job asks for such things. Especially for a technical job that can seal the deal and get you a little extra cash in negotiations.
I now return to my position as court jester.
OT, local edition:
Gov. Lujan-Grisshom (Dipshit-NM) just extended the mask mandate by another month.
https://www.kob.com/albuquerque-news/new-mexicos-indoor-mask-mandate-will-be-extended-for-another-month/6238277/?cat=500
Relevant!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=82&v=MrgmaufTSx4&feature=emb_title
To stay on this topic, local news is lamenting that the Ohio legislature stripped the power to enact a state-wide mask mandate. Already some of the city councils and the like have started passing new city wide mask mandates. At least they’re at the city (and in some areas potentially) and county level so far.
Can’t wait until the local PDs and County Sheriffs start cracking down on the unmasked. That’s when shit will get real, if they don’t just say “nope. not my department,” which many probably will.
Hell even the L.A. Sheriff said nah
Yeah, localities seem to have much more latitude for tyranny. And boy are they itching to use it.
Hunter Biden, M.D.
~+1 Virgin Cleansing Myth
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virgin_cleansing_myth
That should be pretty disturbing, but in a SugarFree article?
Not even a blip on the scale.
I should add, NSFW.
Just one of many fine turns of phrase.
OT: came across this gem from 2014
Simultaneously, we are supposed to be believe that it is the sovereign right of every moron to cast a ballot, and that any restriction, limitation, inconvenience, or delay upon that right is unacceptable tyranny, and also that these selfsame voters must be told what to do, with Straussian lies and subtle behind-the-scenes manipulations, by the very same government that allegedly answer to them through that very same democratic process they are inalienably entitled to.
Duck-speaking requires the necessary recitation of words without any coherent thought behind them. Does that answer your quandry?
The Habits of the Midwit, becoming writ large, lead inevitably to the Era of the Midwit
the importance of informed consent consists in its role in getting people to use medicine effectively,
That is not the purpose of informed consent, at all. The purpose of informed consent is to allow patients to control what care they get. Whether they make “good” decisions or not is of no concern. Remember, you aren’t free unless you are free to be wrong.
Paying patients to use the medical system is one such practice.
That would be unethical, and is currently illegal outside of certain research studies.
Excerpted because substack paywall. From Berenson.
We got a glimpse into modern state-corporate behavior with the Boeing 737MAX fiasco. Why would pharmaceuticals (or anything else) be much different? The FAA and Boeing are basically one organization when it comes to any matter that might be called “conflict of interest” in a different era, and as it turns out, that one organization is incompetent and malicious. But fear not, Boeing will have to pay $2.5 billion in criminal compensation. Of course, they received ten times that amount in their COVID-related bailout from the government, so really the government will pay $2.5 billion on Boeing’s behalf, some of which will go back to the government itself. And no one will see any jail time.
I wonder why the government gave Pfizer and others a blanket immunity. Must simplify the accounting.
I imagine they gave them blanket immunity to keep any and all cases out of the courts and avoid discovery.
Boeing still exists, and hasn’t been carved up, had its top executives hanged, nor its middle managers imprisoned in Gitmo, pour encourager les autres, yet all of the records are out there thanks to discovery. So I don’t know what Pfizer would have to fear.
Oh, I think there are a few very aggrieved people out there that they might have reason to fear.
*Vitaly Kaloyev nods*
Florida woman.
Racist?
Black white supremist?
Another black face of white supremacy. Just like Larry Elder.
Sooo… $53,000?
Does that actually exist?
My instincts say no.
And we have crazy lady talking smack. I would have said kidding around, but she pleads out…. So who knows.
She clearly had no means of carrying out such an attack. Seems weird.
Also weird? No national press coverage of all of the right wing racist hate-group inspired would-be assassins.
Way to ruin Jen Psaki for me.
General Milley Rides Through Streets Of Beijing Shouting ‘The Americans Are Coming!’
“Hey look, those Chinese generals are my buddies, they deserve fair warning—I’ve known them for ten years now, and they are always so nice to me. They were super supportive about that whole Afghanistan withdrawal thing—those friendships are more important than some job,” explained General Milley, America’s highest-ranking military officer.
“I mean—they aren’t close friends, we don’t get together for poker or anything. But we do sometimes exchange funny memes and nuclear codes. We also play that game ‘Battleship’, but I use the actual coordinates of the 7th fleet, which adds that element of realism which makes it more fun.“
Heh.
#resistingforalltherightreasons
So, General Miley: he is being sacrificed by the admin to cover up the complete and total fuck up that is Afghanistan.
California is an alcoholic that hasn’t hit rock bottom yet.
That is all.
California is an alcoholic that hasn’t hit rock bottom yet
When alcoholics hit rock bottom, there is a lot of collateral damage. Not looking forward to this one.
An alcoholic that hits rock-bottom has a chance to make a recovery and live a good life. There is no chance for that in Cali.
This brings a question to mind. Without total devastation, have any cultures that peaked and then dove to rock bottom ever beat their peak again?
Thatcher?
Meh? She seems more like a speed bump to the dive.
There is now no more limit at all on Newsom and the Dems. We will slide even further down to shithole status. This recall will have national implications in that the Dems will now continue on full bore with COVID hysteria. If he had gotten tossed you can be sure that they would have tamped down on that. Now it’s full steam ahead.
I have been focused on the propaganda machine for a few years now. Today, we witnessed a rare event… The propaganda machine had a case of the left hand not knowing what the right hand was doing.
We all watched the right wing media flip out when Woodward’s book revealed General Milley had called his Chinese counterpart on his own initiative, offering to give them a heads up of any attack. Treason and sedition were bandied about.
The propaganda machine went into action… I learned of the response from NBC and the Today Show, Milley was a hero who prevented a nuclear war. I checked, and very quickly this was the official position of the news media. It was probably Woodward’s intended message…. Trump so dangerous he had to be stopped.
But someone forgot to tell the DoD. Now they are saying that Miley was operating under orders from his boss at DoD. They intended to “lower the temperature”. And absolutely no talk of a heads up about any attack ever happened.
Ooops.
So…. What did we learn?
Well, either DoD didn’t like the blowback and are cutting of the treason talk… So they made up a cover story, leaving NBC and the rest with their naked tails hanging out in the wind….
or the DoD is telling the truth… Which means that the Book and all of the spin are lies.
Either way, the entire propaganda machine was lying
Of course they don’t like the treason talk, this isn’t sole example either, and someone might actually get punished for it setting a dangerous precedent. Worse, it might go to pour encourager les autres level. Being a general officer isn’t about putting yourself at personal risk of death or serious injury beyond a papercut.
I still say Mike Boorda had more personal integrity and honor than Milley or most of the general officer corps of all
fourfive services today.Four, Space Force is just the Airforce with different flair.
Apparently it’s the USMC now, it’s part of the Dept of the Air Force but gets its own seat at the JCS. So does the NGB, too.
Milley was Chairman of the Joint Chiefs. There was only one person above him to give any kind of order, and that’s the Secretary of Defense.
That is the claim
Paging RC Dean….
I was not aware of this little legal twist to the PREP Act. This would seem to be why hospitals are refusing to go outside any FDA or NIH guidance for treatment. Do you have anything to add to it?
https://www.law360.com/articles/1260971/upping-hospitals-liability-defenses-for-covid-measures
The “let ’em die act”.
I took a wild guess that the PREP Act was passed under the Bush administration, and what do you know, I was right. Passed unanimously in the Senate in 2005 and with only 17 nays in the House, one of whom of course was Ron Paul. 109th Congress, H.R. 2863. Bipartisanship FTW!
Rumsfeld looks up from hell, smiles and waves.
Interesting group on the nays, Rangel, Kucinich, Waters, Conyers…
There’s over 5 times as many nays on the version that came back from the Senate as on the original, too. Digging down deeper into the actions, and any contemporary press (assuming you can find it; it took me awhile just to find the legislative record since everything is swamped by COVID-related stories) would probably illuminate why. The immunity authority might not have been in the original version.
Yeah, the PREP part seems to have been tacked on at the last minute, as far as I can tell from the various versions of the text.
Rangel??? What happened, bagman got detained?
He always struck me as a bit conspiratorial and nutty like Kucinich.
I’m too old – old enough to remember the king of all NY grifters, Adam Clayton Powell, Jr. Rangel was his spiritual heir.
Daniel J. Flood (1903-1994). US Congressman from Pa. 11th District, 1944 to 1980. His seniority on the House Appropriations Committee and knowledge of the legislative process enabled him to play a key role establishing national programs such as Medicare, Appalachian urban economic development, and Coal Mine Health and Safety Act. He promoted the strength of US military forces and proliferation of nuclear arms during the Cold War. He resigned from Congress amid controversy.
This guy couldn’t get convicted of >150 cases of bribery, because he always spread the wealth.
MF looked like Snively Whiplash.
https://www.taxpayer.net/wp-content/uploads/ported/articles/Untitled-2.png
It was always interesting how many times Paul and Kucinich ended up caucusing together, for diametrically opposed reasons, of course.
Honestly, I haven’t heard anything about not doing off-label use of quinine, GCQ, etc. because of liability concerns. Its just pure herd behavior, groupthink, showing the effectiveness of the anti-Trump propaganda the the CDC campaign to submarine any treatment to get the EUA for their precious vaccine.
Dear Market Watch
Leave the
gungirlfriend. Take thecannoliMiata.Or get a corvette and then you won’t have to worry about the girlfriend issue ever again.
That just causes premature hair loss.
Cart and horse.
Hair loss causes Corvette.
He wants a Miata. Maybe he’s thinking of getting a boyfriend instead.
^THIS.
Also could be a successful hairdresser.
Although I’d actually be very happy if I could find a good NA and would cheerfully drive it.
I worked with this tall lanky dude that drove a Miata. It looked like a Hanna-Barbara cartoon when drove it.
Also, screw Miatas, I don’t know how many times I have tried to pull into what appeared to be an empty parking spot only to find one of those damn things tucked in the corner.
Personally, if it ain’t got a tailgate, I ain’t buying it.
“What the fuck is going on?” Hunter demanded, rubbing his feather boa up under Jen’s skirt.
These euphemisms.
My youngest (11) occasionally sends me emails. She’s a very serious child and undertakes little projects, the latest of which involved raising a specific species of butterfly.
I just received this:
I am so glad she sent me that instead of telling me in person because I would never have been able to suppress my laughter.
Noble creatures ripped from their homes generally have to resort to violence
Poor Scruffy and Nerfherder. Taken before their time.
I think they were named Fred and Ethel.
Her punctuation skills on point.
*sigh*
…are on point.
Well now, isn’t this interesting…
https://www.newsmax.com/john-gizzi/vindman-milley-trump-china/2021/09/14/id/1036427/
I like it when they fight amongst themselves.
Miley is evil and corrupt, Vindman is the textbook definition of a chicken-shit officer.
https://www.rt.com/usa/534850-la-police-vaccine-exemption/
Almost 25% of the force want religious exemptions.
Tremendous job SF. Always look forward to Wednesdays.
I second. Thank you for brightening this Wednesday.