About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

172 Comments

  1. Yusef drives a Kia

    Well done Sir! Bravo!

  2. The Other Kevin

    Nice job as always. We do have a talented bunch here.

    I’m a little disturbed right now, because I can’t tell if that Biden speech was edited together or not.

    • Trigger Hippie

      Was thinking the same thing. Neither would surprise me.

      • Lackadaisical

        Definitely some splicing, he’s not as incoherent had many on the right would like you to believe, but he definitely loses track of things and cannot pronounce everything he tries to say.

      • Trigger Hippie

        I’m still stunned at the audacity of declaring the withdrawal an extraordinary success.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        These days, you have to do it. National politics is just that sick. Any admission of failure is seen as fatal.

    • CPRM

      There is a reason I, as an editor, never trust news stories that only use audio.

      • The Other Kevin

        +1 Fine people on both sides
        +1 Drinking bleach

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        sweet sweet can
        Zimmerman / Trayvon Martin

      • CPRM
    • Drake

      He’s about that incoherent in real life, but there are more long senior-moment pauses were he stops talking.

      • CPRM

        Um axshully, as I found with many of Trump’s so called rants, this was actually a fairly well delivered speech, by my ears new whet what interpretation the world NEEDED! Not like that last one that I didn’t attack.

      • R C Dean

        I recall during Trump’s first run, somebody dubbed over Trump with either a poshy Brit accent or a flaming gay accent.

        What was remarkable was how good he sounded with the poshy Brit accent. Same words, but more coherent somehow.

        The flaming gay accent was just damn funny.

  3. Lackadaisical

    Daylight comes and the troops head home,
    Come mister tollybahn, tolly me bazookas

    1 American, 2 American, 3 Americans, left! (behind)

    • Ownbestenemy

      Don’t know kids from Cali are still in taliban-a
      Daylight come and they wanna come home
      Don’t know dogs in cages still runnin around-a
      Daylight come and they wanna come home

      • R C Dean

        Awesome. I’ve been hoping one of you lot would do that.

    • Not Adahn

      How come nobody’s written a song about the Congress of Vienna set to the Banana Boat song?

  4. Ownbestenemy

    The sudden stop in the speech and walk away…magnificent!

    • limey

      The many footsteps!

      • Rebel Scum

        The Biden Shuffle.

      • Lackadaisical

        He forgot to turn back to get his mask. Otherwise perfect.

  5. Rebel Scum

    I, for one, never pull out.

    • limey

      I don’t know who your avatar is so my headcanon substitutes in Commodore Norrington, even though the uniform is wrong. Does anyone have a pirate avatar?

      • CPRM

        I believe it’s Thomas Jefferson from the HBO mini-series John Adams. No uniform, just fashion.

      • limey

        It had occured to me that it wasn’t actually a uniform depicted but yes thankyou for being completely perfectly technically correct and pulling me up on my imprecise deployment of words, Corrective Pedantic Re-educational Moderator.

        *huff*

        Is it any good? I’ll check it out.

      • Rebel Scum

        I’d recommend it.

      • limey

        I was hoping someone would say “that has to be the best HBO miniseries I’ve ever seen”.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        (Quite possibly earnestly for me, anyway, as tastes are subjective.)

      • limey

        Oddball suggestion? I’m open to it

      • CPRM

        It was very good. Surprised it got made even then. Of course, Adams is presented as knowing how to answer all ills if we just had ENOUGH government and Jefferson is portrayed as an aloof philosopher, but it does show the political dynamics of early America in a way that is rated ‘somewhat true’ while delivering a good dramatic story.

      • limey

        Good enough for me. I don’t mind watching stuff while being cognizant of it’s particular biases or perspectives.

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is based on David McCullough’s biography of John Adams, which is really more about the first American love story between Adams and Abigail in my eyes. Still good read and like you said, come in knowing the end and understanding the perspectives/biases.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I only remember Giamatti, Linney, and a tar-and-feathering, despite being grown-up then. Maybe a rewatch would be in order.

      • CPRM

        I just rewatched the first few episodes before July 4. But I remember the rest from watching when they first came out on DVD. If you haven’t noticed from my AS SEEN on TV bits, I have an uncanny recall for videos I’ve seen. I can’t stand re-runs unless they are in order so I can watch episodes I’ve missed. If I choose to rewatch something it usually means it was really good.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Know what is amazing is that with all their faults, they are still miles above what we have devolved into regarding statesmen. Low bar I know..now why isn’t my 16 year old apprenticing as a dentist.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Aawon Buww! ? ?

  6. limey

    CPRM hello and congrats on another disturbing animation.

    Did you see this video/podcast from the Bee yesterday? It’s separate from the recent interview they did with Coughlin and just an extended discussion with Ethan and Seamus “Freedom Toons” Coughlin just about animation (since they’re both animators). I remember geting a sense from the previous interview that Coughlin seemed pretty intense and cocky but this time I got a bad feeling about him. I always found Freedom Toons to be pretty hit and miss. When he’s talking about sex and women being immodest it put my “so-con” tendencies in perspective.

    • CPRM

      I contacted Seamus on Twitter a couple years ago and never heard back. Soon after he started incorporating editing audio like I was. Don’t know if it is connected in any way, but from my POV it seems that way. And yeah, I still check Freedom Toons when they drop something, but they feel more so-con. But he’s making more money? Got those interviews queued to watch later. Thanks.

      • CPRM

        I am drunk and confrontational now, so I TWEETED!

      • Ownbestenemy

        Man I hope that turns into a Twitter war where no one knows who is who.

      • limey

        Ha! I like Ethan. He seems like a cool dude. I hope he is in fact, a cool dude.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I would love to see CPRM being interviewed by the Bee in the Hat’s voice.

      • limey

        #metoo

  7. Rebel Scum
    • limey

      This is impressive, especially to pull it off live. Mayor Johnson’s Johnson & Johnson.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Nothing like opening the floor for public comment and the board or mayor is like ‘thanks’. Nothing? Nothing to add? This is great that our voices are ‘heard’ but really, we are just talking to brick walls cause they ain’t going to move.

      • db

        In the previous thread, you mentioned that the Pres said there are 11% unvaccinated. Is that true? Are there really 89% vaccinated in the US? If so, wouldn’t that we well above the requirement for herd immunity that they were holding out as a goal last year?

      • Ownbestenemy

        I wrote it awkwardly. I was equating the 11% at the school that was unvaccinated to his statement today that it is a pandemic of the unvaccinated. Probably still not explaining it right. Just found out we haven’t been following our approved schedule that was established last year. Luckily I have good techs that won’t slap me with a grievance….yet.

      • db

        ah, ok, I see now that it was 89% of students at the campus in question

      • Ownbestenemy

        Yeah. Multi-tasking is not all it is cracked up to be

      • Rebel Scum

        I am the 11%. But that number is likely definitely bs. Why are they still pushing it so hard? And the goalposts on herd immunity were moved all the way off the field a while ago. It is about you submitting to medical tyranny and getting jabbed repeatedly until you die. So get in your pod and eat the bugs, bigot.

    • DEG

      I love it.

  8. db

    I rate this video an Extraordinary Success!

    • Ownbestenemy

      Only left out 10% of Biden’s speech even!

  9. DEG

    by all means, come up with a better plan!

    Well, you could pull out of NJ.

    Let me guess, this is an unedited Biden speech?

    • CPRM

      But they haven’t found Bin Laden The Jersey Devil yet.

      • DEG

        🙂

  10. robc

    Found the graph below here: https://brownstone.org/articles/a-closer-look-at-the-us-2020-mortality-data/

    If it comes out eligible, go there for a better looking version.

    Short version of analysis, mortality went up a lot in 2020 including in younger age groups that can’t be blamed on COVID. The blame probably lies on covid lockdowns.

    US Death Rates per 100,000 population
    2019 2020 Change COVID 2020
    Age Group
    1-4 23.3 22.2 -1.1 0.2
    5-14 13.4 13.6 +0.2 0.2
    15-24 69.7 83.2 +13.5 1.4
    25-34 128.8 157.9 +29.1 5.5
    35-44 199.2 246.2 +47.0 15.8
    45-54 392.4 467.8 +75.4 44.2
    55-64 883.3 1,028.5 +145.2 105.1
    65_74 1,764.6 2068.8 +304.2 249.2
    75-84 4,308.3 4,980.2 +671.9 635.8
    >85 13,228.6 15,007.4 +1,778.8 1,797.8
    Source: CDC

    • robc

      illegible, not eligible. And it did, so click thru to see the pretty chart.

    • robc

      chart, not graph. Ugh.

    • Urthona

      Last time I tried to research this I found their overall population estimate was off by some huge amount lower than the census estimate and had barely risen from previous years (instead of the correct rate). Meaning their calculations would be off too.

      I’m not sure I trust them to do anything right these days, frankly.

    • db

      Can someone help me with this? I am playing with these data in a spreadsheet, and took the death rates per 100,000 population, and tried to calculate the raw death numbers based on a given population (330 million, e.g.). Doing this yields extremely high numbers of deaths.

      I am assuming, then, that the “per 100,000 population” is really “per 100,000 in age group” but I cannot find statistics, even at the US Census, to show the raw population by age group.

      What am I missing?

      • db

        I think I may have found the information–from the CDC raw data, these are definitely by “per 100,000 in age group” and I can back calculate the population from that info…

      • db

        maybe not. Doing that shows a total US population in 2018 of 324 million, and in 2019 of 281 million. That’s a lot of alien abductions.

      • db

        OK, figured that error out too. I was applying the 2020 death rates to 2019 population and the 2019 death rates to 2018 population.

    • Gadfly

      When I looked at the CDC’s data for my glibs article on this topic, I came to the same conclusion. There seems to be a pandemic level spike in deaths not attributed to COVID or other respiratory illnesses (which also spiked dramatically during the pandemic) among the younger populations (specifically age categories 15-44), but we will have to wait perhaps another year to get a proper accounting of where those deaths came from as the CDC reports on cause of death seem to lag between 1-2 years behind the subject year.

    • Loveconstitution1789

      JHU sick map

      John’s Hopkins shows fairly accurately how few Americans are actually dying while infected.

      Compare that millions of Americans dying each year from all causes.

  11. Jerms

    Good stuff CP

    • Fourscore

      X2, Thanks.

  12. Tundra

    Hat is my favorite cartoon character ever. I suspect he will actually save the world.

    Nice one today CPRM!

    • Ownbestenemy

      I am thinking those have other uses also…Tonio can you chime in on this?

  13. Sean

    I like it. ?

  14. Gender Traitor

    OT pro tip: If you’re going to use your employer’s letterhead envelope and postage meter for your personal correspondence, make damn sure you get the address right so it doesn’t get returned./mail sorter & returned mail deal-withist.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Never use the company’s ink. Anything to save a buck or two people will do it.

      • Nephilium

        Even if I’m just dipping my pen into it?

    • mikey

      Don’t take your laptop to IT for repairs if the porn you downloaded is still on it.

      • Nephilium

        Don’t lie to your IT department, and if they ask you “Are you sure?” a couple of times, take that as a warning that we’ll open the request if you insist enough.

      • Ownbestenemy

        “Did you go to any sites? Maybe by accident? Misclick?” Usually, cue of you might want to hold off

      • Nephilium

        More then once while working tier 1 helldesk, I had people ignore the warnings and have me put in requests to get various sports sites, personal e-mail, and the like unblocked on their work machines. Once it was submitted, it would immediately send the approval request to the supervisors and managers.

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is good to know that it doesn’t just infest the public sector then. People are dumb.

      • Gadfly

        This is why personal phones exist. Any questionable activity done on work time should be done on your personal phone (not advocating watching porn at work, but browsing Glibs is almost as NSFW).

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      In our current situation, it makes sense that the agencies would just stop reporting when the numbers look like dogshit.

      Here comes the September plunge.

    • Lackadaisical

      Its almost like there is a limit to how much ‘free’ economic growth there is out there, caused primarily by reopening everything after you shut it down. Eventually the results of the ups and downs will be more down than up(adjusted for the normal expected growth rate over the period), I hope that is obvious to everyone.

      I am also worried about September, things are due for a correction anyway, and it is a bad month under normal circumstances…

      • db

        Break some windows, then take credit for the spike in glazier sales.

    • DEG

      Who could possibly have foreseen this?

      You shutdown the economy. You pay people not to work. You print money like mad. You fuck with the flow of goods across borders.

      Who could possibly have foreseen these problems?

      It must just be bad luck.

  15. trshmnstr the terrible

    OT:

    Because of all my adversaries I have become a reproach, especially to my neighbors, and an object of dread to my acquaintances; those who see me in the street flee from me. I have been forgotten like one who is dead; I have become like a broken vessel. For I hear the whispering of many— terror on every side!— as they scheme together against me, as they plot to take my life. But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.” My times are in your hand; rescue me from the hand of my enemies and from my persecutors! Make your face shine on your servant; save me in your steadfast love! O Lord, let me not be put to shame, for I call upon you; let the wicked be put to shame; let them go silently to Sheol. Let the lying lips be mute, which speak insolently against the righteous in pride and contempt.

    Psalm 31:11‭-‬18

    • Tundra

      That’s a good one. Thanks, trashy.

  16. Rebel Scum

    Rep. Pramila Jayapal
    @RepJayapal

    Abortion care is health care.

    It’s also infrastructure.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      It’s also patriotism and love and hope and any good word that we’ve thoroughly corrupted to mean nothing.

      • Ownbestenemy

        “word that we’ve thoroughly corrupted to mean nothing” Like birth-control?

      • Tres Cool

        Or facist.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Can’t tell if that’s a misspell of racist or fascist, but both are correct.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Hey Tres, why not repost your missing lawyer link?

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        …for the lawyers here, that is.

        GD fumble fingers….

    • Ownbestenemy

      In a very narrow sense it is when life of mother is on the line but we all know they don’t mean that.

    • limey

      I laughed a dark and hopeless laugh.

      🙁

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Where’s that from, D & H?

      • limey

        My mind ?

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        ?

        I would have thought Dickens or Waugh or summat.

  17. limey

    Apparently an ISIS terrorist killed a bunch of people in the super safe country of New Zealand. I demand to know what he was doing out if his house and whether or not he was vaccinated. In all seriousness, at least 48 hours will have to pass before I even remotely consider anything about that.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Imagine the horror if it wasn’t for NZ’s common sense gun bans! That PM chick saved everyone.

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      There’s a good chance he was at least wearing a mask.

    • Q Continuum

      ‘“What happened today was despicable, it was hateful, it was wrong,” she added. “It was carried out by an individual — not a faith, not a culture, not an ethnicity, but an individual person who is gripped by ideology that is not supported here by anyone or any community. He alone carries the responsibility for these acts; let that be where the judgment falls.”’

      Unless the perp was a White Christian, then it’s White Western Culture’s fault.

      From The Failing NYT (won’t link, fuck them).

      • rhywun

        gripped by ideology that is not supported here by anyone or any community

        That is an impressively concise exemplar of double-think.

      • limey

        A thousand curses on that horrible woman and her fellow travelers.

  18. Scruffy Nerfherder

    *golf clap*

  19. Tres Cool

    My couch pulls out. I don’t.

    HMU ladies

  20. Tundra

    Meanwhile, in Israel.

    So masks don’t work, vaccines don’t work, vaccine passports don’t work and lockdowns don’t work.

    Did I miss any?

    • Gender Traitor

      Folks who get more $$$ on unemployment than at their old jobs don’t work.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        *standing ovation*

      • Tres Cool

        And if you have to deal with a union like I do, the thought that you or a famiy member has or has been exposed to CoVID gets you paid 14 days off.
        Test results desirable, but not mandatory.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        I cannot comprehend the inaccurate power of observation I witness every day.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Re cause and effect, anyway.

      • B.P.

        I spoke to someone who assured me that this is a right-wing talking point and not true. He was an econ major in college. I guess incentives aren’t part of the curriculum anymore.

      • DEG

        Or alternatively, those people are working shit jobs and their bosses should pay them more.

      • Tundra

        Love that. Thanks.

    • mikey

      “Cases” don’t matter?

      • mikey

        From robc’s like above – a good read BTW.

        “Given that, after almost a year of mass testing, the cohort of PCR-test positives can certainly be considered a representative sample of the general population (with perhaps the only exception of the very young), this is what every statistician and epidemiologist worth his or her salt would have to conclude: The positive Corona-test is a random variable in relation to the observed result “death“. “

    • Rebel Scum

      Oh, it is all working as intended.

    • Loveconstitution1789

      Pulling out doesnt work!

      • hayeksplosives

        I know it’s satire but damn.

        “ Children are obviously better off dead than having to be alive and poor!”

      • Ownbestenemy

        It is sad…none of them think how many George Washington Carvers or Arthur B.C. Walker or even self-important Neil deGrasse Tysons have been lost to this.

      • hayeksplosives

        Or Thomas Sowells.

      • Nephilium

        You think they want more Thomas Sowells or Clarence Thomases?

    • Ownbestenemy

      Those wiley Christians….Dallas resident Debbie Woods

    • Ghostpatzer

      Learn to code swallow

    • Nephilium

      But what about when she gets hit by a bus?

      /tony

  21. trshmnstr the terrible

    Hey Blackjack, I’m not sure how close to home this one is for you, but sounds like a potential opportunity to piggyback and express your displeasure at the bind you’ve been put in.

    • Ghostpatzer

      That link is as safe as it gets.

      • Ghostpatzer

        Nice rant, but Razorfist is off the mark regarding the Poo Paper shortage; clearly he hasn’t spent any time at Casa Patzer.

  22. Ghostpatzer

    Nicely done, captures the essence of dear leader perfectly.

    • Ownbestenemy

      The lefty should embrace it. People did with Bush and Reagan and Clinton then we just stopped and said we can’t do that anymore!*

      *until it is not our guy then we can make fun but we have to be pissed if it is Team Retard doing the making fun.

      • Ghostpatzer

        Late night TV died in 2008, when poking fun at the WH became off-limits depending on the current occupant.

      • Ghostpatzer

        OK, maybe not. More Dana Carvey, please.

      • Ownbestenemy

        If CPRM can get Carvey to voice Biden for future H&H…I say we start a campaign

      • Ghostpatzer

        LOL. “Spread your cheeks for human trafficking”

    • DEG

      There’s a longer version of that video out there.

      • Ownbestenemy

        The guy’s commentary is damn hilarious as I am on some of his other videos.

      • DEG

        Yes, he is good.

    • R C Dean

      The antifa anti-capitalists hopping into their Mercedes after their photo op is just . . . *chef’s kiss*

  23. hayeksplosives

    Ok, I’m physically sore from laughing.

    And I’m in public eating lunch. Must recompose self…

    • hayeksplosives

      By which I mean, very well done, Sir CPRM!

  24. Ownbestenemy

    Im down a rabit hole.

    • Ownbestenemy

      What…never mind…ignore it

      • Ghostpatzer

        You are not my supervisor!

    • db

      OK, so at the end of the video talking about how social media influencers are killing society (video on YouTube, btw), he has a sales pitch for clothes you can buy to promote his Youtube channel.

      is that perfect, or what?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Absolutely.

    • Loveconstitution1789

      Georgia doesnt have high vaccination rates and we no lockdowns, no mask mandates, no vaccine mandates, no vaccine passport mandates, and bidness is a booming!

  25. R C Dean

    Here’s the thing about the withdrawal.

    We were told early on that nobody knew exactly how many Americans were in Afghanistan, but it was estimated to be 10 – 15,000. They say they evacuated around 6,000, and only a hundred, maybe a few hundred, are left. That math doesn’t work.

    And with thousands of Americans supposedly coming back from Afghanistan in the course of a few weeks, how is it that I have not seen one single news story about any of them arriving home? I know I don’t really monitor the news that much, but still.

    There is just so much that doesn’t add up.

    • MikeS

      There is just so much that doesn’t add is being covered up.

      FIFY

  26. westernsloper

    He’s Back! Good work CP!