Tales of the Belt Pt. 14 Mercs in the Cloud

by | Oct 18, 2021 | Comic, Fiction | 215 comments

Pt. 14 Mercs

 

The Clan

 The proposition Cat offered us was high risk/reward, an assignment at the edge of our capabilities, we assembled the Council, and 4 to 3 we decided to take the job.

  My name is James, but they call me JR Gibbons, Chieftain of the Conchos tribe, and head of the Mercenaries Guild, that job I did not want, but when you are herding cats, maybe you need a Dog. Our story goes back centuries, to a tale preserved by my Great Grandmother. I come from a line of mercenaries, going back some 600 years, from freedom fighters to Weapons designers, our clan was built for war, and still is. Our Motto is, “No glory without Sacrifice”

And as the new hires file into the Academy, they are reminded of the sacrifice our founder made, his words etched in the finest White marble, a testament to his greatness, and our visionary.

 

 JR Gibbons (1829-1865}

  Letter written by commanding officer after leaving the grave site of James R Gibbons.

Lieutenant James R Gibbons of Company C Barry Battalion Southern States Frontier Regt.

 

On the 8th day of Jan 1865 Lieutenant James R Gibbons fell mortally wounded in the battle with indians in the Dove Creek Battle. He lived until Jan 16th. A braver officer than Lieutenant Gibbons was never sworn. He was a freemason, a Christian, a good man and a true soldier. He was respected by those who knew him best.

We can not call him back so let us revere his memory on the banks of the Concho. Far in the distant west lies

this brave warrior in his quiet peaceful rest.

S G S McGarry

 

Plans of the Cat

 Lord this man is tedious, he understands every aspect of our journey, and the potential for action, how does he know?

 Gentlemen hello, I am Cat Fletcher, and I command the Leopard, as you know Seamus and I have made some new discoveries, and some new problems have come up. While the Tuyani are highly intelligent, they possess no defences to speak of, they say they are explorers, nothing more, I do not believe them for a second. I let that sink in, it worked.

However, the CCP is headed towards a Titania object in hopes of harvesting the Titanium, and the Tuyani has asked us to deal with the situation, we have already been given coordinates to some rich rocks in payment, and we don’t need the CCP in our way anyway.

 

 “1 Billion Quats” my men’s jaws dropped, this would be the biggest run in our history, then it got better, “Elon has seen fit to equip us with latest Railguns, for a modest fee” Just what I needed to hear, we agreed to terms and with two weeks, we prepared..

 

Mars Prime

As soon as I landed on the promenade I heard the news, Kerry had been lost in a Nuke accident on Nephilium, the old testing ‘roid, and the entire thing was vaporized, to the Sun, as the saying goes, Painful, but I had business first…

 I found my usual sleeping place, dressed for the Evening and headed downstairs to Rose’s Cantina. As I sat and ordered my usual Ale, I wasn’t really looking for women, having lost two in as many months, so I was surprised to see Tangent. She was an old friend who wanted nothing to do with me, and it was good to see her. Of course she wanted to sign on as my cook, alas I declined. This one was tricky, and we may not come back in one piece, if at all, she understood, and we finished the evening in comfort.

 

JR

  We had 14 days to prepare, this meant 11 days of prep, 2 days to say farewell and then load out Day. Many militaries don’t understand our ways, but we are pay to play and take our work seriously, we do the hard jobs first, and relax later. Gunny Cole set up the infantry with updated rail rifles, they had some unique abilities, as we found out. Our weapons officer was a man named Patton, and was having some issues with mass distribution installing the new, much larger Rguns, so we called Elon.

  “ JR, you’re ready to go, the upgraded mounts should work out, and I added a special touch to it all, the guns can be jettisoned and then self-destruct, giving you an opportunity to run. Of course the destruction of the guns is, how would you say, spectacular? Take this under advisement” With that, Elon returned back to his lair as we concluded our business here, tomorrow was load out, and then 6 weeks to somewhere..

 

Time to fly

The Conchos had 12 ships, 2 Companies of Infantry.and light artillery, I had Leopard, Moria, and a Company of fighters amongst my crew, we were ready for a fight, with who? We’ll assume it’s CCP, but we are eyes wide open, six weeks of 15 G, Let’s Go!

To be Continued,

 

 

 

 

About The Author

Yusef drives a Kia

Yusef drives a Kia

Punctually illiterate But never late

215 Comments

  1. Yusef drives a Kia

    I hate Word Press!

    • hayeksplosives

      Dude, let Yusef have a few minutes before going waaaaay off topic, will ya?

      • hayeksplosives

        Ok, I sit corrected.

        It’s like you guys know what you want and have agency or something.

        I’ll go sit in the karen corner and think about what I did…

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Oh stop that Lady, you know what I like,

      • Hyperion

        Of course we do, it’s all Space Milfs, you total Oort Cloud Horndog Pig.

      • Hyperion

        Karen Corner… I like it. You’re OK for a non-existent female libertarian, Hayek, I’m all for letting you hang around.

      • hayeksplosives

        Geez , thank you Archie! Should I go make myself a sandwich too?

        😉

      • Hyperion

        You should make us all a sammich of course. /total Glib male

      • Ownbestenemy

        We are but simple creatures blessed with the grace of the better sex

      • Hyperion

        That’s not the way God intended it. Read your scripture. It’s an age old struggle, sure they’re purty, but they are evil.

      • hayeksplosives

        Ecclesiastes 7::26

        26 I found that some women are worse than death and are as dangerous as traps. Their love is like a net, and their arms hold men like chains. A man who pleases God will be saved from them, but a sinner will be caught by them.

      • Hyperion

        I like you even more now, you can totally hang around without making sammiches.

      • Fourscore

        I know where I sit, trapped after all these years, guess I won’t be casting any stones

    • Ownbestenemy

      My god…freckles…can’t go om

      • MikeS

        But those eyebrows…wow.

      • Ownbestenemy

        She has eyebrows?

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        as a Redhead, I can testify, our eyebrows, they are transparent

      • Ownbestenemy

        You havent been on zoom lately when I have been there. Apparently I am voldemort reborn and have no eyebrows

      • Ted S.

        Mike has a fetish for Brezhnev-like eyebrows.

      • MikeS

        More like a repulsion to said commie-brows.

      • rhywun

        I hate freckles. Guess why.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Er?

      • rhywun

        Opposites attract.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        Ah.

  2. hayeksplosives

    Thunderous applause, Yusef, weaver of space and Earth, fact and fiction, history and future!

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      /Takes bow and promises more,
      Thankee!

  3. Ownbestenemy

    If I cannot go to the stars Yusef and now animal bring them to me.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Come journey with me OBE, I have Miliions of mile to go!

      • pistoffnick

        The woods are Space is lovely, dark and deep,
        But I have promises to keep,
        And miles to go before I sleep,
        And miles to go before I sleep.
        -Bob Frost

      • hayeksplosives

        I do love that poem.

        And I’m not much of a poem appreciator.

  4. rhywun

    GO BILLS!

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Elon just Nuked you from Space Rhy!

      • rhywun

        He doesn’t like us coasters does he.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I guess not

      • hayeksplosives

        I just want the Bills to get a ring while Jim Kelley is still with us.

      • rhywun

        Yeah.

        This new kid is turning out to be pretty good, too.

      • Contrarian P

        They’re looking pretty good this year. It’s been 20 years so I can finally root for them after all of Wade Phillips’ whining and crying when he got burned on a trick play. They replayed it endlessly, even modeled it in a computer, and it’s still a lateral.

      • rhywun

        I didn’t pay any attention to football between the mid-nineties and last year so I didn’t know who that was until a trip to Wikipedia.

      • Contrarian P

        You didn’t miss much.

      • hayeksplosives

        “You didn’t miss much.”

        Harsh!

        Lol

      • slumbrew

        “The Patriots won” covers most of that period.

  5. Ownbestenemy

    I get a Space Quest vibe to this. Oh look…DosBox + late 80s, early 90s Sierra games work!

  6. The Bearded Hobbit

    “Glibs: come for the snark and stay for the stories”

    I love this place.

    Thanks, Yusef

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I’ll finish this soon, and then another Journey, this time with Space Sluts!

      • creech

        You’re going to put Commiela, AOC, and Dunham in space??

      • Contrarian P

        Please for the love of all that’s holy, no.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        ” So Kirk and i walk into a bar”

      • slumbrew

        I support shooting them into space. Sunward, preferably.

      • TARDis

        Space Sluts: A Penetrating Story of a Flaming Re-Entry

  7. Hyperion

    I just got done working. OMG I fucking hate Duo Security.

    Anyway, my clients are fucking morons. I hope they don’t read Glibs.

    • rhywun

      We switched from Duo to Microsoft Authenticator.

      It requires an extra fingerprint scan from my thumb ?

      • Hyperion

        I currently do not have a choice. But I’ve figured this out years ago, it’s all leading up to the point where we say fuck it and instead of logging in 23,000 times a day, we give them our DNA.

      • rhywun

        I’d rather log in with my thumb 23,000 times a day than entering my password after they already got my thumb arrrrgggh.

      • Chafed

        You work at home. Please tell us you put your dick on the pad for authentication.

  8. Hyperion

    “My name is James, but they call me JR Gibbons, Chieftain of the Conchos tribe, and head of the Mercenaries Guild, that job I did not want, but when you are herding cats, maybe you need a Dog. Our story goes back centuries, to a tale preserved by my Great Grandmother. I come from a line of mercenaries, going back some 600 years, from freedom fighters to Weapons designers, our clan was built for war, and still is. Our Motto is, “No glory without Sacrifice”

    Yusef, I’m watching your writing style develop here, and I have to tell you, I like this. Keep it up, bro.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Thanks, Hype, glad you noticed,I have been learning a bit!

      • Hyperion

        You are. Good to see. I currently have zero writing skills but want to learn some day.

  9. hayeksplosives

    Pfew.

    So glad the Titan player gave the thumbs up as they wheeled him off on the body board.

    He was out like a light, not moving a thing for several minutes.

    I hope the Bills doctor who implemented the ice water to the veins of the nearly paralyzed Bills player is in the stadium and allowed to help the Titan player.

    • Hyperion

      The NFL are scum. I already hated them, but I hate them more for what they did to Gruden. Those self righteous pricks deserve the worst of the worst.

      Sorry, you were talking about something else, I didn’t see that. I hope he is OK.

      • rhywun

        You can hate the elites at the top without hating the plebes.

        Same as any other endeavor, I guess.

      • Hyperion

        Oh, I have total respect for the players and staff. I’ve loved football since I was a kid living in Cali. The NFL are making it hard these days, woke morons.

      • rhywun

        I think the NFL are just following the culture.

        They’re not going to change until “we” change.

      • hayeksplosives

        This was in 2007:

        BUFFALO, Sept. 15 — In the moments after a serious spinal cord injury paralyzed Kevin Everett of the Buffalo Bills below the shoulders, doctors began an innovative treatment based on a familiar premise: apply ice to reduce swelling.

        In this case, though, instead of using ice, doctors chilled Everett from the inside, infusing cold fluids into his veins. The treatment is experimental, though, and medical experts caution that it is impossible to say in an individual case whether it helped or hurt.

        The rest of the story is that the Bills organization kept him on “injured reserve” for a couple of years so he’s qualify for his NFL pension when he “retired”. That’s a class move, Bills.

        He walked on the field years later to a standing ovation. He’d have been a quadriplegic without that doctor.

      • hayeksplosives

        I will add that the doctor who started the iced saline water did it literally on the sidelines and had to shove a couple of people out of the way to do so.

        He later said that he just had a feeling he needed the ice water to be right THERE with no delay.

        To my dismay, this has been rewritten in the Interwebs to be about “experts” and consensus, not one healer passionate about saving a guy right then.

  10. hayeksplosives

    . A braver officer than Lieutenant Gibbons was never sworn. He was a freemason, a Christian, a good man and a true soldier. He was respected by those who knew him best.

    Love it.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Inspired,

  11. Ownbestenemy

    Watching DopeSick. First off Michael Keaton is awesome and second…we are watching this play out in real time just with Covid vaccines.

  12. hayeksplosives

    The bartendress at the hotel lounge is very cute, a little busty, unfortunately flat assed

    BUT she belted out Alanis Morissete “Uninvited” in Karaoke on Saturday and won me over.

    Her speaking voice is pretty much Bernadette from “Big Bang Theory.”

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Flat ass, done,
      /Curvy Women Rule!

    • Ownbestenemy

      Naturally busty women tend to have flat asses and vice versa.

      • hayeksplosives

        We should probably never meet.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I said tend to…didn’t say all. Geesh you people.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Tend? even that is a lie! Big butts and nice Tits are like Manna from heaven bro!

      • Ownbestenemy

        I didn’t say I don’t like them…just on visual evidence of my 40 years on earth show that if you have ample both its a rarity.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Then you haven’t been on Earth long enough, Boobs and Ass go together, sorry your experience is lacking,

      • Ownbestenemy

        Feel like we are talking past each other.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        What planet are you from? All of my busty ladies had/have nice asses, bummer you missed out bro,

    • Chafed

      If this is the beginning of a threesome then remember to take some pics.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I wish, OMG!

  13. hayeksplosives

    Titans are determined to keep this interesting,

    Bills 31, Titans 37. 7:39 minutes left.

    • hayeksplosives

      Derp Titans 27.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Ceres 27, Titan 10 Belter Football league!

    • rhywun

      Bills blew it. Some questionable decisions there.

      Oh well.

      • Contrarian P

        Well maybe but I can certainly understand going for a 4th and 1 on the road to get the win rather than trying to overtime.

      • rhywun

        Maybe against a different team in a different game.

        I would have gone for the overtime.

      • Contrarian P

        Definitely a reasonable opinion. I think there’s plenty of room for debate. I’ve heard good arguments on both sides.

      • Contrarian P

        “For” not “to”. Overtime isn’t a verb, but give sportscasters a minute and it might be.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I have card like that, but I have plausable deniabilty, I have an alibi for my vax card, and and a nice printer with card stock,

    • Chafed

      Time to take a lesson from Kyrie Irving.

    • MikeS

      I wonder who narced him out. Easy money is on the ex-wife who accused him of beating her up.

    • rhywun

      It’s a strange world where exceptionally fit famous people are more at risk of losing their livelihood to bullshit theater than most of the rest of us.

    • creech

      Pissant money – Clinton, Obama get 10x that to appear at some corporate event and reel off some b.s. that was covered in their last MSM interview.

    • one true athena

      Michigan has something like 30 “diversity” administrators, IIRC, all pulling six figures. So that’s just them decorating the nest they already feathered.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        “30 “diversity” administrators,”
        Yay for us?

      • Ownbestenemy

        One for every three genders, races and whatever insanity we think of

  14. The Bearded Hobbit

    I don’t see a reference to the T’Cha at all.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Different Timeline, different story, I like more tales, Animal brings it!

      • rhywun

        Perhaps there will a Grand Unified Glibs universe some day.

        SPACE SMITH vs. the T’Cha. Let’s make it happen.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Ohhh, I may have to talk to Animal, that’s a fun idea!

  15. Brochettaward

    The birds will sing. The waterfalls will freeze in their place. And Yusef will form coherent thoughts. The First That Will Change Everything grows.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Fuck Thineself! that is all,

  16. Gustave Lytton

    https://www.oregonlive.com/health/2021/10/federal-judge-denies-last-minute-bid-to-block-oregon-vaccine-mandate.html

    “In the middle of a global pandemic while infections and hospitalizations continue at high rates, Plaintiffs are not likely to succeed in showing that their individual interests in remaining unvaccinated outweigh the State’s interest in public health and welfare,”

    Yes, because inalienable rights are reduced to balancing tests of “interests”.

    some state employees may face firing for failure to be vaccinated, he added that “it’s still only money” and they can get their job back or their pay reinstated if they prevail in the case at a later point.

    Good news Judge. Your paycheck has been stopped pending final outcome of the case, including any and all appeals. You can get it back then. Maybe.

    The judge, though, cited findings from the Centers for Disease Control in concluding that the Pfizer vaccine vials and Comirnaty vials are physically and biologically identical.

    That’s nice. But legally they are separate and distinct drugs.

    This simply is nowhere near the same as Nazi doctors performing experiments on victims held against their will in concentration camps, as was the subject of a portion of the Nuremberg Trials.’’

    Oh, so medical ethics and the Nuremberg code only apply if interned in a camp? Bullshit.

    “Plaintiffs have not shown that the international community collectively condemns this type of choice as the type of coercion that falls within the prohibition of the Nuremberg Code, particularly during a global pandemic and when the vaccine is FDA-authorized,” Simon wrote.

    Oh, so the standards for ethical behavior is based on what the international community decides? The international community that was largely silent about those evils before and during much of WWII?

    Further, Simon noted, the vaccine mandate offers state employees choices: either get the vaccine, apply for a religious or medical exception or find a job elsewhere, including out of state.

    Hey asshole, how would you like to fed headfirst into a wood chipper for your decision? That’s not a threat because you have the choice to retract your ruling,

      • Ownbestenemy

        Pretty sure that was an accident just like the techs accidently giving covod vaccine versus flu shots.

    • Ownbestenemy

      So redress when medical or religious exemptions are denied and watch this same judge twist and contort to justify why that is also okay

      • Gustave Lytton

        They had the opportunity to seek an accommodation. There’s no obligation for the state or private employer to grant it. Case dismissed.

      • creech

        If “public safety” is such an over-riding concern, then why is religious exemption allowed? There’s no religious exemption to pedophilia or human sacrifice or decorating cakes.

      • rhywun

        Vestige of old America. You can be sure they really, really want to get rid of that.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Sure does put their insistence on public accommodation into a logical bind.

    • Brochettaward

      When The First That Will Change Everything is unleashed, this judge will die in a spontaneous fire. It will not be quick. It will excruciatingly painful. But it will usher in the new world.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        The best comment is no comment, I said that for all Glibs,

      • MikeS

        I really like this comment.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        See?

      • MikeS

        I was referring to Bro’s comment.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Well then die in his fire, Haha!

    • one true athena

      Hobbit probably has more info, but heard on the family grapevine, same in NM where a group of ~ 100 LANL employees just got their suit dismissed too. Because actual FUCKING SCIENTISTS are too ignorant to understand public health or something, obey Brandon or get fired, fytw

      God, I really am beginning to loathe all these petty dictators and the fearmongering media that drove this nonsense.

      • Chafed

        It’s going to be hard to make more nukes without them. Maybe Milley is planning to drop hardback copies of Das Kapital instead.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Not much Nukin’ going on lately. Near as I can tell they run projects to see how many genders they can count.

        Shame, it was a marvel in its day.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Follow-up to my own comment.

        Not one of the regional news sites had an article on this decision. KOB.com, KRKE.com, and worst of all, LADailyPost.com. News from the Laboratory should be the latter’s core source of stories.

  17. slumbrew

    I suspect Fox is regretting setting up the post-game set outside of Fenway; the crowd

    – loves Ortiz
    – hates A-Rod

    That combination has the whole crowd alternating between chanting “Papi!” and ” A-Rod sucks!” loud enough that it’s hard to hear the analysts.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      HAHA!
      /Nelson laugh

    • Gustave Lytton

      “Let’s go A-rod!”

    • slumbrew

      They have to keep hitting the dump button now.

      The crowd is boisterous. As might be expected after a post-season beat down (12-3, Sox)

    • MikeS

      Why would anyone hate A-roid?

      • tripacer

        It’s one of the things you’re taught in Mariner’s Fan Indoc course. 1) Hate A-Rod. 2) ‘Member that time back in ’95 when we didn’t suck? Keep remembering that.

    • grrizzly

      At least they were not chanting “Let’s go Brandon!”

      Still not 100% sure that I watched it in 4k.

      • slumbrew

        I was hoping for that chant

  18. Ownbestenemy

    First couple of episodes of Sleepy Hallow are well done with nice digs at what we became as a country.

    • MikeS

      A new Sleepy Hollow?

      • Ownbestenemy

        TV show from a few years ago

      • MikeS

        Ok, yeah. Didn’t know if you meant a new one. It’s a good show.

  19. Gustave Lytton

    The new season of Goliath is taking a big dump on Big Pharma.

  20. Gustave Lytton

    “safe and effective” = “Raymond Shaw is the kindest, bravest, warmest, most wonderful human being I’ve ever known in my life”

    Funny how so many people use that exact phrase.

    • Gustave Lytton

      Required testing, not based upon any legitimate need = forced medical procedure. Sure it’s minor intrusion but it’s still a forced medical procedure and unethical.

    • Tres Cool

      I concur.

    • Sean

      This timeline sucks. I want to reload a save point from last year and try again

      • Tres Cool

        What kind of name is St. Onge anyhow ?
        reminded me of this from Its Always Sunny

  21. limey

    I enjoyed this, Animal. It sounds grim and bleak but hopefully things will pick up.

    • limey

      No wait, this is on the wrong post. I haven’t read this yet, Yusef. Sorry.

  22. UnCivilServant

    Morning Glibs.

    It was 52 in my house this morning, so I finally closed my windows.

    Watch, it’ll roast by the afternoon.

    • hayeksplosives

      I’m having to adjust to high desert weather!!

      Apparently having a jacket:coat in the car at all times is going to be required.

      • UnCivilServant

        How’s it going so far?

      • hayeksplosives

        It’s going! The movers brought all my furniture into the new house under my direction, did a great job.

        I still have a thousand boxes to open and unpack, but the backbreaking work is done. I’d love to share pics but Imgur insists on a WiFi connection, which I don’t have.

        I’m back at the Best Western tonight because I didn’t want to cope with making the bed and also wanted to watch the MNF game.

        A neighbor came over yo introduce himself (and his wife) while the movers were working. We chatted and exchanged phone numbers. He gave me a little intel on the neighborhood.

        Lots of American flags, Gadsden flags, POW/MIA flags.

        A few “Pray for America” signs.

        I think I’ve found my people. ?❤️

      • UnCivilServant

        I had a longer comment, but it was a bit incoherent.

      • Sean

        Cardigan.

    • Tres Cool

      SW Ohio autumn weather- the heat runs at night, a/c during the day.

  23. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam

    yo whats goody

    It was my day/night off, and while Jugsy has been snoring away with fevered dreams due to Moderna Part Deux, Ive been up since midnight pounding beer and cursing my aged soldering iron. And the bipolar water heater. We’re about to have a ‘Come To Jesus’ talk when I reprogram that shitty Rockwell valve controller with a framing hammer and replace it with a mechanical one from Lowe’s.

    TALL CANS!

    • UnCivilServant

      My soldering iron is on backorder. I finally found one which claimed to be made in the usa. It’s a hypothetical right now. So I have solder, flux, and no iron.

      • Sean

        Who doesn’t have multiple soldering irons?

        *shakes head*

        Kids these days…

      • Tres Cool

        My backup is in the garage, and its a Weller gun. 300/200W selectable. A bit heavy handed for boardwork and the caps Im trying to replace.

      • Tres Cool

        Come with me to the Dark Side- we’ll visit Harbor Freight. My current iron is a Weller that I bought at least your age ago, from a table at the Dayton HamVention. And at that time, it was likely your age old.

      • UnCivilServant

        If we can find some good old irons, I’d prefer that. But I donno how many of those are on the market.

      • hayeksplosives

        I’m a Weller girl myself!!

        They can pry it from my cold dead hands.

      • TARDis

        We got rid of the Wellers and most of the Metcals years ago. My dudes prefer PACE. To each, his their own. Have not touched any of it in years myself.

      • Tres Cool

        PACE looks nice. And spendy.

        For my purposes these days, chineseium from HB or Northern Tool works.

      • l0b0t

        I’ve had one of these for about 10 years. It’s cheap and gimmicky, but it works perfectly for the once-every-couple-years I need to solder something.

        https://www.coldheat.com/

      • TARDis

        That looks functional for the occasional home job. I could replace the butane torch I have.

      • db

        No soldering iron? That’s what nails and a hot fire are for.

    • UnCivilServant

      You have a thing for hair fins too?

      • UnCivilServant

        You have too many fetishes, almost HM-worthy.

      • Tres Cool

        Upon some reflection and analysis, the thing I have for her would be giant, blonde, women, that can cook.

      • UnCivilServant

        *shrug*

        I’m not judging, I’m only teasing.

        And I have an unrelated headache that is impeding my focus.

    • rhywun

      I like her shows but yeah, I guess I was wrong about that too.

  24. l0b0t

    This popped into my feed; a Swiss rifle range where one shoots across a busy highway. Cool stuff – https://youtu.be/2h1s6S4kotE

    • TARDis

      Cool. What would happen if they put one of those near say… Chicago?

    • Ghostpatzer

      That is very cool. Shocked no one has shot up the highway, I guess THOSE guns don’t have agency.

  25. Festus

    Rant On/ Supervisor sent me a job ticket yesterday but she was dense enough to include the entire E-Mail chain. I got to read three levels of bullshit before it reached me at the bottom of the totem pole. Two photos later and some camouflaged snark (Glibs have served me well!) I have put those cocksuckers by choice in their place. It always comes down to the same issue. Client complains, parent company makes unrealistic suggestion, I have to defend my actions and call upon my years of service and then they finally pony up the dough to fix the problem. Nine years I’ve been dealing with this dunce-capped tomfoolery. I did get a pretty good zinger in at the one fellow that revealed himself to be the stupidest one of all. That was some transitory joy! Fuck them, they’re no friends of mine and I wish they would stop trying to bum-fuck me. /Rant Off

      • Festus

        How else would the beating continue?

    • Ghostpatzer

      Mornin’ Festus. That sounds like fun!

    • TARDis

      Good for you, Fes! Lay the smack down on ’em.

      • Festus

        It was cool. Superintendent of the plant has failed three times thus far to paint lines on the floor. The photographic evidence made me feel like Gil Grissom sinking his dick into Lady Heather. It was quite satisfying!

  26. Gender Traitor

    Greetings from Ohiopalachia! Our lodge room looks straight into the woods, and the barely-visible horizon is just now starting to turn pink.

    • UnCivilServant

      Are there even enough hills to be part of appalachia, or is it a cultural thing?

      • Gender Traitor

        Oh, this area IS officially in Appalachia, and there are plenty of hills. Getting here was an adventure in itself – lots of twisty, curvy, up & down. Culturally, not that you’d notice, at least based on the lodge staff.

    • rhywun

      RWJBarnabas has taken a hard stance with its employee vaccine policy. In July, the health system fired six supervisory employees for not getting vaccinated, per its managerial policy at the time.

      So this “99.7” figure they’re touting doesn’t include however many they’ve fired between July and yesterday.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Informally delegate what government cannot legally do to the private sector through a series of seemingly unrelated, but very related when it comes down to it, carrots and sticks. Private organizations have become good at recognizing the demands that, as all good toadies do, the demand doesn’t even need to be made. They’re quasi governmental private organizations and should be constrained from doing this shit.

      • Ghostpatzer

        My biggest concern these days is not being banned from retail outlets or even loss of employment, but the possibility of being denied medical treatment. We are not there yet, but the writing is on the wall.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        They’ve been trial ballooning exactly that, and to trumpeted fanfare from the majority. Thankfully there are still some medical personnel who have souls and would treat us anyway.

  27. Stinky Wizzleteats

    “FDA To Allow “Mixing and Matching” Of COVID Boosters”

    https://www.zerohedge.com/covid-19/fda-allow-mixing-and-matching-covid-boosters

    Sounds like a good idea and by good I mean not good, terrible in fact. If one or two shots in particular have long term issues how in the hell are they going to be able to trace those back for any kind of root cause analysis?

    • UnCivilServant

      More proof were any needed that it is long past time to dissolve the FDA.

    • Gender Traitor

      Ooh! Ooh! I know this one! “Feature, not bug,” right??

      • Ghostpatzer

        ^^^ Exactly. No way to determine culpability when things go sideways.

      • Trigger Hippie

        Dammit!

        That’s what I get for not refreshing the page.

    • Trigger Hippie

      ‘…how in the hell are they going to be able to trace those back for any kind of root cause analysis?’

      Feature, not bug.

    • Not Adahn

      Why would it matter who’s at fault if they’re all immune from liability?

      /lawyer

  28. Not Adahn

    The weather has cooled down enough that four of the dogs at the park were wearing sweaters

    • UnCivilServant

      You know if there weren’t such opposition to fur coats, the dogs wouldn’t need wool.

      • Not Adahn

        I’ve got a pic for an upcoming IFLA that shows where Lily’s coat was shaved back for her spay. That Pyrenees in her heritage is giving her vast amounts of fluff.

  29. UnCivilServant

    Having found a paint remover capable of taking off bungled spray primer without damaging the plastic, I set about trying to salvage a squad of Termies that had a seriously borked primer coat. It takes a lot of scrubbing, but I’d been making progress.

    then one fell off my desk and broke off the arm. I’m starting to wonder whether these guys are worth the effort.

    • Festus

      I bought a huge scale model of the Bismarck when I was into that. Must have been nearly three feet long. I taped off the waterline and used the wrong paint. Melted the hull. I had already put about 80 hours into the top. I got so pissed off that I threw it in the fire pit. Never tried again and I was very good at that hobby.

      • UnCivilServant

        🙁

        These are little guys. It’s always worse when it’s a big model.

  30. Festus

    If they come after me for the cootie shot, I’ve got an angle. Judging by the walls of bagged cans in the drinkin’ room, I might just have found my life’s purpose! It’s something that I’m good at and if I were to become destitute I could shed the shame! I’d become a beer can God! All will tremble before me and lament!

    • rhywun

      I would have to fight off an army of little old Chinese ladies to pursue that career around here.

    • Ghostpatzer

      Planning to come to NYC? Beer can collection is a staple of the local economy, you’ll fit right in!

      • Festus

        Kidding. Wal-Mart greeter (wait, they wouldn’t hire me before) or delivery driver. You read it here first, folks, Festus wasn’t Wal-Mart material.

      • Festus

        That was a dark fucking day.

      • Festus

        I had my own ideas about running a warehouse seeing as how I’d run them for many years before. BIG MISTAKE. Independent thought was frowned upon, apparently. Same thing happened at another site. Maybe I’m just a stupid cunte that doesn’t know the racket.