After – Ep. 5

by | Nov 5, 2021 | Fiction, Prepper | 189 comments

(ep 4)

 

Success, setback, success, setback, Alvin thought with particular bitterness as he received an answer to a question he had pushed to the back of his mind. He turned east onto the six lane boulevard and passed through a smoky haze wafting down from the burning cell antenna swaying in the wind. The tower was creased midway up, parts of a large tree still wedged in the impact point.

Bensalem tower fire: Crews dismantle cell tower that ...

A tear rolled down his cheek as he thought about his wife and daughter, who probably never had a chance. They’d certainly never reunite with him, even if they were alive. Or would they? His ever-present optimism allowed him to hope.

She’ll know to get the hell out of Dodge, right? She’s smart enough to drive away from the carnage, I’m sure. Where else would she go? She has family in West Texas, but there’s more of a support system in Batesville. 

Alvin tabled the internal discussion when a pair of luxury SUVs flew past in the opposite direction at insane speed. He watched them in the mirror, but something else caught his eye. He had turned away from the major north-south thoroughfare on purpose, believing that the smaller streets would fill up more slowly. His intuition had been correct. He watched in awe as the traffic backed up into the intersection. First one lane, then the next, then the one after. The speeding SUVs, encountering a partially blocked intersection, plowed over the median and cut northward into the southbound lanes. In a matter of moments, the road had become impassable. The nightmare had begun.

The 10 Biggest Traffic Jams Ever - The Drive

Please. Please. Please. Please. “Please, please, please, please,” he chanted as he rounded the corner at the empty intersection and headed north, “Please! PLEASE! YES!” Alvin looked down an empty street that he knew only continued a couple hundred feet beyond the bend that obstructed his view. He glanced from side to side, taking in the scenes of devastation. He began to see movement and other signs of life in a way he hadn’t seen in the prior forty minutes. People digging through rubble. Piles of supplies next to neighborhood streets. Even a family strapping a tarp full of provisions to the top of their hatchback with what appeared to be speaker wire.

As he approached an intersection with entrances to the neighborhoods, he checked the speedometer. 75 was a bit excessive, even given the circumstances. He let off the gas pedal and slowed to a reasonable speed in case somebody was pulling out with less caution than he was exercising. Alvin’s foresight paid off as a maroon sedan flew around the corner, tires squealing, and screamed northward. Curiously, as Alvin made his way through the intersection, a green car pulled out from the other side of the intersection and headed southward.

“South? Why would you head toward the destruction?” He watched the car as it approached the major intersection to the south and made a perilous turn to the right. “They have to know that the main road is already choked and there’s no escape that way, right? Why go that way?”

He glanced in the mirror at the baby, who didn’t proffer an answer. Turning his attention forward, he was able to observe the speeding maroon car slow just enough to make a turn at the tee where the road ended.

Red Maroon Compact Military Car Sales Europe Photos Of ...

“And now he goes east,” Alvin whispered, watching the maroon car reach the decision point. “Hmm… interesting.”

The maroon car, rather than turning east away from the town center, turned west toward all of the congestion.

“First, the pickup was heading west. Then the SUVs. Then the green car. Now the maroon car. What am I missing? How do they think they can escape by driving into the maw of the beast?” His mind hardly regarded the road as he encountered the tee and turned eastward.

His thoughts trailed westward.

What’s west of here? Kroger, Aldi, Walmart, Whole Foods, and a bunch of restaurants.

“Ahhhh, the looting begins.”

Protesters march along San Pablo. Looting reported at Pak ...

I wonder how many have decided to shelter in place, get food, or otherwise dilly dally rather than getting the hell out. Sticking around seems like a shit plan. This place is gonna be a hellscape within 12 hours. 

He drove past neighborhood after neighborhood, watching much the same human survival instinct play out like it must be for miles in either direction. Some were shell shocked, some were preparing to shelter in place, some were driving to loot the stores, and a few were preparing to drive somewhere. After a few minutes and for the first time since he started out, there were other cars moving in the same direction. Not many, certainly not enough to cause congestion, but it was clear that as he moved away from the epicenter, fewer were dead and more were getting on the road. A pang of fear settled in his gut.

Mopping the sweat and concentrated fear off his forehead, Alvin looked at the sign for the upcoming intersection.

Capital Road, not so big that people would flock there, but not so small that it’s likely to deadend before we get out of town.

He signaled his northward turn purely out of habit, shaking his head at the unnecessary gesture. The closest car was a quarter mile behind them.

We only have a couple miles until it opens up into prairie. Only a couple minutes until I can take a breath.

As he drove through the gentle curves in the road, he noticed that more and more cars seemed to be piling onto the road. More poured out of each neighborhood like flies from the mouth of a carcass. It wasn’t congested yet, but he had the feeling of being chased downhill by a snowball, and he could see its grim shadow cast over him.

Please God, let them all be getting onto the highway. You got me this far, now just a little further.

The last major obstacle was coming into view off in the distance. Highway 294, the final major east-west road before the metropolis thins out. Alvin squinted through his prescription sunglasses, trying to see any movement on the overpass. His heart sank when he saw the unmistakable sight of multiple 18 wheelers parked in traffic on the overpass. As he crested the hill and saw the rest of his path, he sighed. Gridlock.

Terminal operators decry closure of Ijora Bridge, says it ...

Worse than that, he saw people out of their cars milling about. The tail end of the parking lot was about a half mile ahead and closing quickly.

Turn now.

Alvin braked and turned into the neighborhood to his right, following the command. The voice in his head was not his own, and it had an authority to it that he was not used to. Obedience was his only option.

Okay, I can maybe cut through here and find a smaller crossroad or a way to get on the highway or…

He stopped mid thought as he rounded a corner onto a scene of crisis. There were ten, maybe fifteen people hacking at a tree that had fallen across the street with branch loppers, hatchets, and other wholly insufficient equipment. They were focused on  the canopy of the tree, where Alvin could see bits of a car poking out. He slammed on the brakes and shifted the car into reverse.

Tree Falling on a Car Insurance Claims

Damn it to Hell! I don’t have time for…

You are here to help.

He froze for a moment, car creeping backwards with no pedal input. The chainsaw in the back seat caught his eye. Slamming the brakes yet again and shoving the car back into drive with a bit too much gusto, the car jolted forward and he pulled up near the tree, Alvin parked and flung the door open.

One of the men helping clear the brush turned and approached. “We need help! My sister is trapped in there and she’s hurt! I think she’s bleeding out!”

“I can help,” replied Alvin, pulling the chainsaw out of the back of his car, “can somebody watch my baby?”

The man nodded, turning to the chaos. “Jessica, come here!”

A teenaged girl, not more than 14, quickly tossed some brush aside and jogged over. She was covered in dirt and sweat, and a few spots of blood. “Uncle John! Mom is having a hard time staying awake, we need to…”

“I need you to take care of this man’s baby,” John interrupted, his tone of finality drawing a look of unveiled panic across her face.

“But, but… we can’t just give up…”

“He has a chainsaw. Watch his baby and he’s going to get Charlotte out faster than the rest of us could.” John turned to Alvin, “I hope to God that thing actually works.”

“I had it running 15 minutes ago, so we should be good.” Alvin tossed the case aside and quickly felt the carburetor for heat. Satisfied that the engine was still warm, he pulled on the cord.

BRRRRRRRMMMMM… BRM, BRMMMMMMM

The saw started without a hesitation and settled into the staccato purr of its idle.

“The biggest problem is that the branch pinning her in there is being held down by other branches. We need to clear them out before we can get that one.” John said, quickly walking Alvin around the tree to the front of the car.

Alvin winced as he came around the tree and could see what had happened. A foot-wide branch of a large oak had obliterated the dashboard of the car and likely smashed her feet with it. A smaller branch sliced through the driver’s compartment and rested in Charlotte’s lap like a restraint bar on a roller coaster. Alvin couldn’t tell if the branch was suspended there or whether it had smashed through her thighs. The fact that she was still alive indicated the former was more likely. There was blood spattered on the dutifully deployed airbags, but not much. Alvin couldn’t clearly see anything else with the door and leaves in the way.

He could, however, see what John meant about the other branches. A bough, with six major branches, had fallen on top of the car and sat across a portion of the branch pinning Charlotte, putting enough weight on the branch that it bowed substantially. Everybody had been gingerly removing what they could, avoiding putting any more weight on the pinning branch, but they had only made it partway through one five inch log with a hand saw.

“We had to stop going at the first one, the sawing motion was too agonizing for her.” John quietly spoke. “We were trying to clear some brush to get at the second one when you pulled up.”

He turned away from the others and his voice halted as he whispered , “I don’t want her last moments on the Earth to be searing agony.”

“I’ll go as quickly as I can. I’ll try to keep pressure off the branch. Can you get a couple people to grab the last two? They’re liable to fall into the car after I cut them.” Alvin responded, focused more on the task ahead than on John. By the time he processed what had been said and how he had responded, the moment had passed. Alvin could beat himself up for his lack of compassion later.

With a rev of the saw, he started in on the first branch. He could see the car between the leaves, but couldn’t see in to know how the trapped driver was doing. It didn’t really matter for his part of the job. He wasn’t stopping until it was done.

The first branch cut like butter, falling away and exposing the second branch. Alvin heard a yelp of pain over the idling saw as the first branch caught on the pinning branch during its tumble to the ground. The cut was already finished, the pain temporary.

On to the next one.

Types of Saws for Cutting, Trimming & Pruning Trees ...

 

 

 

About The Author

trshmnstr

trshmnstr

I stink, therefore I am.

189 Comments

  1. ignoreLander

    Whaddup doh

    • Ownbestenemy

      Stealing is wrong.

  2. DEG

    Does he succeed?

      • DEG

        😉

  3. kinnath

    Always looking forward to the next installment.

  4. ignoreLander

    Someone, somewhere else, someone I trust, was asking about my nick. This cohort (Glibertarians) was way too clever and figured it out within minutes. But I was just made aware a few weeks ago of a cool video that I didn’t know existed so I’m making it my nick link.

    But I watched it again just now — it’s no secret I’m a drooling R.E.M. fanboy. Bill Berry was the backbone of that band. Seriously, did you know that this quiet, humble drummer wrote a majority of their massive hits, not Stipe or Buck? I don’t know Bill’s politics, and I’m so happy for it.

    Buck, Mills, and (oh for the love of God) Stipe are SCREAMING leftists, so I know their politics. Ergo, I know what was behind the song “Ignoreland” — it was a screed against Reagan and the first Bush.

    But man, if it doesn’t apply right now, in the age of Depends-loading overreach, I don’t know what does. I’d love to track down a bored Michael Stipe and a bloated Peter Buck and hear their thoughts on this song in the days of Biden’s puppet master’s tyrannical shit-show.

    But I’m glad I can’t, because I don’t want to know the answer. As the saying goes, never meet your heroes.

    • The Other Kevin

      One of my top concerts was REM in Chicago, 1989. Four encores. The played every song from every album to date. Except Superman. Unbelievable.

      • ignoreLander

        Superman was a cover done by some obscure band I never heard of. But that’s why — I can see them being pretentious “artistes” who will only perform their own songs.

        I sound like a jerk that hates them — my all time favorite band rotates a lot between 3 and they are one of the three. However, like most people (admit it Glibs) I was a fucking douche as a teenager and I thought I knew it all because I listened to R.E.M.

        And they played the part too. Now I can see it for what it was, some really really REALLY good music, but it didn’t change jack shit. Teenage and early 20’s me was very deferential to those guys’ talent.

      • rhywun

        I thought I knew it all because I listened to R.E.M.

        I just thought they wrote good tunes. I literally do not pay any further attention to most music than that.

        Taped Life’s Rich Pageant from a HS buddy and I was hooked.

      • The Hyperbole

        The Clique. the original is on regular rotation on LSUG.

    • rhywun

      I’m a fan and I didn’t even get the reference. They kind of fell off my radar in the early 90s.

      As for Bill’s politics… they formed in a college town FFS. You do the math.

      I saw the Green tour in Buffalo – I think that was ’89.

      • Zwak, sensual panzer

        Yeah, I saw the Green tour at the Shoreline amphitheater. The less said about that the better.

        But I grew up in a college town, so the politics seemed normal.

      • rhywun

        I don’t even like that album. I was there to hear the old stuff.

        Buffalo is weird in that it’s both a college town and so not a college town.

        It made for a lot of interesting dating challenges.

      • Zwak, sensual panzer

        I think part of the problem is that I wasn’t a fan, was just along for the ride. They must have played for four hours, and by the end, I think everyone was bored. It was just too long.

        San Luis Obispo was a college town (30K pop.) and everything revolved around that. It was cool growing up, was great at the right age, and then you aged out.

      • rhywun

        I don’t remember anything like four hours. Yeah, that’s too much for a rock band.

        I can see blissing out to, say, Tangerine Dream, for four hours, though.

      • Chafed

        Every Springsteen fan has a sad.

      • ignoreLander

        As for Bill’s politics… they formed in a college town FFS. You do the math.

        Plausible deniability my Scrow.

    • Sensei

      Weird Al Yankovic- Spam

      That said still was a big fan.

      Spam in the place where I live (Ham and Pork)
      Think about nutrition, wonder what’s inside it
      Spam in my lunchbox at work (it’s the best)
      Really makes a darned good sandwich anyway you slice it at all

      • ignoreLander

        It’s an actual fact, and I might as well own it, that I have seen Weird Al (3) more times than I have seen R.E.M. (1)/

    • commodious spittoon

      All I know is, when I wake up with a screaming hangover, more often than not End of the World is playing through my head.

      • l0b0t

        Start at 17:35 for my favorite cover of that song by Saint N and Helena Handbasket (NSFW) – https://vimeo.com/331549282

      • ignoreLander

        Damn that “Philm” is kind of the epitome of scratch auteur…. That must be what black turtleneck-beret wearing hipsters must have felt in Paris in the 60s. I like — I need more of that in my life. Makes Wes Anderson look like Rob Reiner.

      • l0b0t

        Oh, and I will totally jump around and shout to Radio Free Europe anytime I hear it.

      • commodious spittoon

        SPEAK ENGLISH MOTHERFUCKER

      • UnCivilServant

        English. Dost thou speaketh it?

      • commodious spittoon

        i GOT YOU AS FAR AS DAMN AND HIPSTER AND BERET WEARING AND AUTEUR, BUT THE REST OF IT IS FUCKING NONSENSE

        I’m channeling @ZODIAC_MF

      • commodious spittoon

        As if there’s a West Anderson. I checked, there’s not even an East Anderson

      • ignoreLander

        Mother effers! I shall have my revenge. For the younger people, and I don’t know how many, or even if any, exist

        I was going to do an essay on REM. And it made me want to do an essay for Glibs. And the this one by the way, this one is tired. I need to contact TPTB.

        In the meantime, enjoy some music, you young people who think REM is “Losing My Religion” and “The One I love”

        https://youtu.be/hEwPZyZ7lJk

        https://youtu.be/Xo1lRslQNTM

        https://youtu.be/PrR6qQ3I4e0
        https://youtu.be/EqBcKRz1BPc

        https://youtu.be/KA2n60NoOwY

        https://youtu.be/kXVeHjj_odw

        https://youtu.be/nJp2yfBmjCs

      • Nephilium

        Back in the days of radio stations and FM, one of the local radio stations started looping It’s the End of the World one morning. They continued it for 24 hours. No commercials. No DJ chatter. Just that song… over… and over.

        They were changing their call letters and format. It was enough of a publicity stunt that they got mentioned on local TV news, papers, everywhere.

      • Nephilium

        Nah. Like this (look under the chart performance).

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        A local station did that same thing with “Stairway to Heaven”.

        We were traveling and I noticed that the station we were on was playing “Heard it Through The Grapevine” by Creedence over and over. Since that time, whenever it comes into rotation in the library, I give it a “repeat”.

    • rhywun

      LOL wow

  5. trshmnstr the terrible

    Psalm of the day

    I hate the double-minded, but I love your law. You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in your word. Depart from me, you evildoers, that I may keep the commandments of my God. Uphold me according to your promise, that I may live, and let me not be put to shame in my hope! Hold me up, that I may be safe and have regard for your statutes continually! You spurn all who go astray from your statutes, for their cunning is in vain. All the wicked of the earth you discard like dross, therefore I love your testimonies.

    Psalm 119:113‭-‬119

    • ignoreLander

      Amen Trashy — may God keep us all at this time…. I put it to my elderly parents in context, and they admitted they had not seen a test of this manner, in their younger days.

    • rhywun

      This one’s not much different in my copy, other than the thees and thous.

      I have “vain” instead of “double-minded” – which actually seems clearer to me.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        They’re both less than perfect translations. Most of the commentaries on the verse point to “wavering beliefs” or undue doubt. Perhaps “vaccilators” would be a better translation.

        Barnes’ Notes on the Bible
        I hate vain thoughts – This commences a new portion of the psalm, distinguished by the Hebrew letter Samech (ס s), answering to our “s.” The word rendered “vain thoughts” occurs only in this place. It is rendered by the Septuagint, παρανόμους paranomous – transgressors. So the Latin Vulgate. Luther renders it “die Flattergeister,” the frivolous-minded. The word means divided; a man of a divided mind; a man who has no sure faith in regard to divine things, but is driven here and there; a sceptic; a doubter. Compare James 1:8. Thus it refers not to his own thoughts primarily, as being “vain” or worthless, but to a state of mind or heart in general, where there is no firmness, no stability, no settled view: a state of mind wavering, doubtful, skeptical, in regard to religion.

      • rhywun

        Interesting. Maybe yours is closer after all.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        The commentaries are all over the place, but the most convincing interpretation, at least to me, is roughly “those who worship God and also other idols”. A clear current example would be those who try to synchronize Christianity with Buddhism.

      • Sensei

        Trashy – what Bible version do you usually use?

        My family is Episcopal and they and many others standardized on King James. OTH, my wife is RC and I’m RC educated and that Bible gets continuously updated as well as including books that aren’t in the King James. My wife gets annoyed when I refer to it as the apocrypha.

        I, OTH, am a nonbeliever so I don’t have a horse in this race.

      • rhywun

        Is KJV not a Catholic Bible? I’m pretty ignorant in this stuff.

        What little formal induction I got was RC. I would hate to be reading from the wrong Bible! 🙂

      • Sensei

        No. That came after the break from Rome and the desire for the English Church to have it own Bible.

        It’s used by many other English speaking Protestant denominations now. But I know far less about Evangelical Protestants and what they use.

      • rhywun

        That came after the break from Rome and the desire for the English Church to have it own Bible.

        Yeah, the second I clicked Post I realized the obvious.

      • Ted S.

        That’s because the proper term is deuterocanonical. 😉

        My understanding is that the Orthodox Bible has books not in the Catholic Bible.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I’m usually working out of the ESV. Relatively recent translation, attempts word-for-word/thought-for-thought literal translation, and is clear enough to make heads or tails of even if you’re not a religious scholar. It’s a bit calvinist, but you’re going to get that with most modern translations.

        I like to read parallel translations when I’m reading for deep study, but I’m currently just absorbing the psalms, so only using ESV.

        I don’t care for the KJV. I abhor KJV-only churches. It’s translated, in part, from the Septuagent and the Vulgate, which calls some of the OT translations into question. Translation of a translation, which sometimes results in the context being lost or muddled. Mostly, I don’t care for it because it’s inaccessible to the lay person. Even assuming a proper translation at the time, the English words have changed. For example, there was a verse quoted at me from the KJV about “debate” being sinful. If you look in the modern translations, the word is “strife” or “quarreling”. The guy quoting the KJV at me was interpreting it as the modern definition of “debate”. ?

        I don’t really have an opinion on the deuterocanonical books. I’ve been to a Catholic Bible study or two that dove into them, but I’m not well enough informed to have any stance on the issue. That may make me a bad Protestant. ?

      • Sensei

        I have the same issues with KJV. At this point the English language has changed enough that you need modern English reading of the English.

    • creech

      “All the wicked of the earth you discard like dross, therefore I love your testimonies.”
      Does He? Last week, the pastor again prayed – for the twentieth straight month – for God to deliver the world from the pandemic. Questioned, she cited the development of vaccine as God’s loving response to our prayers. All the world’s evils seem to go on and on, and many of the most evil get to die peacefully in their beds. Maybe they face God’s wrath in the next world, but literally millions of innocents have died at their hands before God gets to “discard the wicked.”

      • Mojeaux

        The whole premise is that this life is transitory and that it’s in the eternities that God punishes the wicked, and that justice will be served.

        That’s not a defense, though, just doctrine. I understand what you’re saying and sometimes I wonder, too.

        It’s the eternal question: How does a loving god allow bad things to happen to good people?

      • Ozymandias

        God? How does anyone put this on the Almighty?
        I mean, I can’t think of a clearer example of man’s arrogance that literally has not one iota of fault that could be placed on the Almighty.
        Covid is almost assuredly a man-made, genetically manipulated virus that – coincidentally – happens to go after people with “co-morbidities.” Which co-morbidities?
        Why, only those (mostly) associated with chronic disease. What’s that – chronic disease? Oh, only those near-daily, repeated actions by human beings that are bad for their own health, that (among other things) make their immune systems weaker. The week of 20 Dec 2020 was when the CDC got itself in trouble by reporting that “94% of the people who died with Covid had on average 2.9 co-morbidities.”
        They’ve been trying to walk that back ever since.
        And that’s to say nothing of the lockdowns, the economic destruction, wrought by the arrogance of elites. All I see is human douchebaggery in the whole thing – I would grant God complete absolution. (wink, wink)

      • Mojeaux

        The only thing I have to say to that is, check your email. LOL

        So, I said “allow”. I didn’t say God did things to his children. Now, Mormon theology is that this life is a probationary period that we must all suffer through (and have joy also) to go on to the eternities well prepared for whatever we’re going to do for all time.

        However, if we’re gonna go there, I can think of something to put on the Almighty. Job. The Almighty and Satan made a bet, with Job as the object. Any way you wanna cut that, it was a cruel thing to do. “Yeah, my dude will be faithful to me no matter what, so have at him. Do your worst.” Not a particularly loving thing to do.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Not a particularly loving thing to do.

        Only if the mortal life is the end all be all. God used Job’s suffering to tell a story of enduring faith that is still inspiring the faiths of others through suffering many thousands of years later.

        /Just my opinion

        But as for the good things of this life, and its ills, God has willed that these should be common to both [good and wicked men]; that we might not too eagerly covet the things which wicked men are seen equally to enjoy, nor shrink with an unseemly fear from the ills which even good men often suffer. . .

        . . . the same violence of affliction proves, purges, clarifies the good, but damns, ruins, exterminates the wicked. And thus it is that in the same affliction the wicked detest God and blaspheme, while the good pray and praise. So material a difference does it make, not what ills are suffered, but what kind of man suffers them. For, stirred up with the same movement, mud exhales a horrible stench, and ointment emits a fragrant odor

        the good are chastised along with the wicked . . . not because they have spent an equally corrupt life, but because the good as well as the wicked, though not equally with them, love this present life; while they ought to hold it cheap

        -Augustine

      • Mojeaux

        I know what the story is supposed to do, faith building and example and all that yadda yadda yadda. I used to use that line on myself when I began to think about it and go, “Heeeeyyyyy wait a minute…”

        Only if the mortal life is the end all be all.

        I won’t accept that caveat. It was an objectively shitty thing to do to a faithful disciple.

      • Mojeaux

        Or, put another way, would you do that to your kid?

      • Sensei

        Mojeaux – that’s my issue with much of the Old Testament.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It was an objectively shitty thing to do to a faithful disciple.

        Strongly disagreed. We are not co-equals of God, deserving of his respect and favor. We are broken inferiors deserving of nothing more than death for our sinfulness. “Job didn’t deserve that treatment” is exactly wrong, IMO, because it trivializes the Fall and the redemption of Christ.

        This is where I think Mormon theology diverges greatly from mainstream Christian thought (although, I think Calvinism shares this weakness, albeit from a different direction) . Without Hell, without wrath, without damnation, life is just a puppet show. A morality play acted out by unwitting actors. If we’re all generally good beings who just need to sand off a few rough edges before being ushered into paradise, then God is a wicked deity. He torments. He causes suffering. He kills en masse. He extinguishes the good in people without a moment’s hesitation.

        If, on the other hand, we are beings with free will and moral agency, but who are so hopelessly corrupted that we wouldn’t recognize actual, potent goodness even if it hit us in the face, then God is extremely merciful to allow even one of us to impute His righteousness as our own. Temporal suffering is not only judgment for our sinfulness, borne by the righteous and the wicked alike because “all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God”, but also training and equipping of the righteous for eternity.

        8We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; 9persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 10always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies. 11For we who live are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. 12So death is at work in us, but life in you.

        13Since we have the same spirit of faith according to what has been written, “I believed, and so I spoke,” we also believe, and so we also speak, 14knowing that he who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus and bring us with you into his presence. 15For it is all for your sake, so that as grace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, to the glory of God.

        16So we do not lose heart. Though our outer selfd is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. 17For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, 18as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal

        2 Cor 4

      • Mojeaux

        I could give this a proper fisking, but you have your view and I have mine, and they are diametrically opposed. Neither one of us is going to give up the ghost.

        My Sunday school teaches Job the same way yours does. In fact, I got the side-eye when I said “it was an objectively awful thing to do” in aforementioned Sunday school class.

        But this:

        We are broken inferiors deserving of nothing more than death for our sinfulness.

        has to be the bleakest and most despairing sentiment ever. Yes, I know that this is why Christ atoned for our sins, but I still take issue with it–again yes–in the context of Mormonism having no place of eternal torment.

        A big flaw I see in evanglicalism is that people who have never heard of Jesus (you can’t choose what you don’t know exists) are going to end up in an eternal lake of torment. “Collateral damage” was how it was explained to me. Or, a little more callously, “Sucks to be them.”

        [[[We]]] believe that justice will be served and mercy will be granted on Judgment Day, as Christ is our judge and, as what he suffered in Gethsemane informs him of our motives and weaknesses and fears, he can judge us fairly because he did, in fact, walk a mile in our shoes.

        So while I can see the eternal implications of suffering, it still sucks here on Earth.

        My question, “Why does God allow bad things to happen to good people?” never was part of my thought process because I thought it was a puerile question. Duh, we’re here to suffer and learn and know joy (balance, can’t have one without the other) and grow in knowledge and truth.

        Except recently, I got to thinking about my Krampus and Santa story that I can’t really write without a good answer to “Why does Santa [assume magic is at play here] visit some good children and not others?” and the “others” are usually poor and/or in awful circumstances, and they are the ones who need Santa the most. And that brings me round to the question of injustice.

        Aside, regarding free will: Here’s the thing about free will. We can only choose what we know exists.

      • Cannoli

        I am a total novice, so take this for what it’s worth: the way I think about it is that all that is true, good, beautiful, life-giving, and joyous comes ultimately from God. We don’t hold a steady position at a fixed distance from God; at every moment we are either moving closer to Him or falling further away from Him. Taken to eternity, we will either be fully united with Him or completely separated. And if we are utterly separated from all that is true, good, beautiful, life-giving, and joyous, that’s Hell.

        Once a man is united to God, how could he not live forever? Once a man is separated from God, what can he do but wither and die? -C.S. Lewis

        Also, we are not able on our own to bring ourselves into right relationship with God, instead He draws us to Him and we have the opportunity to respond to that grace or reject it. In my personal experience, that process of God drawing us to Him began long before I found faith. My hope is that people who do not know God directly know Him implicitly because He is reflected in His creation, and that God is drawing them to Him without their yet realizing. But I don’t even know what His plans are for me, much less for others.

      • Cannoli

        Jordan Peterson draws a distinction between tragedy and malevolence, and thinks that we’re equipped to deal with tragedy, but we have a harder time dealing with malevolence. Theologically, though, it seems to me the other way around. Free will inherently comes with the possibility that people will use their free will for evil, and I can accept the idea that God has deemed free will worth the cost. It’s harder for me to understand why God permits the tragedies that aren’t a consequence of free will, like natural disasters. Then again, maybe if we were building our houses on foundations of rock, the storms would not shake them.

      • Mojeaux

        Malevolence and tragedy, in my personal life, I should say, seem to be equally grave, but in different ways. “It is what it is.” Sure, you live with the consequences, but I think you grieve for different things.

  6. rhywun

    The illos this week are eerily on point.

    Good stuff!

    • R.J.

      Wow. Quite the party!

    • Chafed

      The claxon going off really sets the scene.

  7. ignoreLander

    For DEG, if you’re still around tonight:

    I found this missive from a Brazilian, so I’m assuming it’s how they make it at the churrasco:

    https://braziliankitchenabroad.com/grilled-chicken-hearts/

    Anyway, assuming I can consistently get hearts at my Asian grocer, then I’ll be trying all of these — nothing like opening up a new arena when it comes to your comestibles….

    • DEG

      Oh my.

      Thank you!

    • Gustave Lytton

      My Mexican brother-in-law’s family makes spaghetti with chicken hearts. A grocery catering to Latinos should carry hearts and other less common cuts or offal.

      • Sensei

        Now I’ve got a craving for yakitori.

      • Chipping Pioneer

        Chicken hearts skewered with salt, pepper, garlic, and cumin over charcoal is the whizz.

      • ignoreLander

        the number one search result when I asked about “how to prepare chicken hearts” was ‘yakitori’. once again, when I’m well prepared, damn sure I’m going to make it that way.

        gustave, I’ve been frequenting my local carniceria for many years to get tripe — but for vietnamese cooking. after this week, i’m going to pay much closer attention to every form of organ meat they have available.

        chipping, your recipe just got added to the list. keep ’em coming….

      • Gustave Lytton

        Tripe and chicken hearts are available at Safeway around here now, thanks to the swelling Latino population.

        Come to think of it, tripe was regularly available at the grocery when I was a kid. Disappeared from the chain grocery stores somewhere along the way until recently.

      • rhywun

        I swear my mom served tripe a couple times when I was little. I, of course, wouldn’t touch it.

  8. UnCivilServant

    After yesterday’s 16 1/4 hour day, today’s been a 14 hour day and counting.

    • ignoreLander

      14 hour day and counting.

      I feel you my friend. Are you among us salaried people? Those whose managers say “We’re all professionals here — if it takes more than 40 hours some weeks to to get your job done, well, that’s why we pay you more, and why you take so much pride in your work”

      I’ve never worked less than 40 hours in a week unless I’ve taken my own PTO. And for those weeks where “the job needs to be finished”? I’ve gone as high as 60 hours (120 in a pay period).

      You want to tell me how well you pay me? Let’s average out the hours worked per week against my salary. Plus all those hours I spend on email, or texting, or on my personal cell phone (which the company doesn’t pay for), helping out people at the office, even if I’m on vacation. Or a holiday. Or on the weekends.

      “We’re all professionals here”? Go screw yourself.

      • UnCivilServant

        I am “Overtime Exempt” not “Salaried” If I go below 75 hours ina two week pay period they make me charge time or I’ll lose pay. If I go over, I get nothing extra.

        Fortunately the timecard system (and managers) are of a mind for my grade level that “As long as it adds up to your time” I get paid normal.

      • ignoreLander

        I like the sound of that. I’m in the “Here’s what we pay you annually” category, meaning, when my performance review comes, if it’s been determined I didn’t finish enough work to earn my money, well it’s curtains.

        I make it sound way worse than it is, I work for an awesome company. However, I work way more than the 2080 hours that “full time” ought to be, and never get a dime of overtime.

        However, they do dole out bonuses at year’s end, and again, are pretty generous. So maybe I’m just being a bitch because it’s Friday night and I only had 2 bourbons and that’s just enough to make me do angry commenting….

      • rhywun

        My workplace is pretty chill about this stuff. They don’t really overwork us too much and on those occasions when they do, it’s easy to barter for some time off elsewhen.

        I’m trying to avoid the manager-track, which I understand is a whole ‘nother ballgame.

      • ignoreLander

        I’m trying to avoid the manager-track, which I understand is a whole ‘nother ballgame.

        In my particular line, there are 2 or 3 levels above “manager”. So, I’m at the manager level, and at my yearly reviews when they asked my goal I would always say “I’m gunning for your position”. Truth is, I’m happy where I am — good solid pay, no real boss, autonomy, no pressure to bring in new business….

        That’s going to be a hard one to spin come next review, however, I’m pretty pleased with where I am, getting a 3% raise or so per year, but continuing on as usual.

      • rhywun

        Me, I’m confident I can do it – I just don’t want to deal with the massive pile of tedious bullshit that comes with.

        I’m pretty sure whatever raise it might come with – and I’m already somewhat underpaid according to the surveys I’ve read – won’t be worth it. Absent moving to another company.

      • Tulip

        You should write an article about your adventures with chicken hearts. Or really, since you love it – offal. I think that would be really interesting.

      • Tulip

        I don’t know how this ended up here – threading fail. Anyway, you should write an article Ignorelander

    • UnCivilServant

      15.25 hour day and counting

  9. hayeksplosives

    My husband is miserable no matter what I do try and help him. He’s living in a fantasy world in which if we just went back in time to 2017 in Minnesota everything would be wonderful. Roses everywhere, him playing in his Southern Rock cover band, me bringing home the bacon.

    Then I get this crazy notion that my Minnesota job is starting to suck, so I move to San Diego to work for my arch rival. That was great for me! But he hated it and let me know that every damned step of the way, even after the “are you with this or not?” Speech I had to give.

    So now we are in Nevada. He’s given me positive noises all along the way; we like the house, got a lot done today. I thought things were good.

    Now he’s in bed saying “Just shoot me.” I asked “what was that?” And he answered that he just wanted to go home. I asked what he considered home, and he gave me some crap about me not knowing. And just shoot him.

    Gah, I hate drama bois.

    • rhywun

      Where is he from?

    • ignoreLander

      <>

      I don’t know a better or more appropriate way to show my support. Except to say, I’m really hurting where I am, but I care about my friends at least as much, if not more, than I care about myself.

      Prayers, etc. :^)

      • ignoreLander

        God-effing dammit

        I wrote a nice thing, it was erased because I put around it. Shit, sorry hayeksplosives….

      • hayeksplosives

        Thanks man. I know none of you can fix anything and I don’t need you to.

        I just. We’d to vent. It’s one of the fundamental gaps between men and women: women talk about frustrations and other women listen and validate her point of view, and that’s all she needs to feel the burden lifted.

        Women vent about problems to male friends, coworkers, brothers, and as soon as she’s done venting , she’s good! Unfortunately her male supporters are miserable because they just want to “fix” the problem.

        They have no idea that by listening they have literally fixed the problem.

      • Mojeaux

        When I vent to my husband, I usually have to preface it by saying, “I’m just venting.”

        Usually, if I want him to solve a problem for me, I will tell him the problem, what I have done to try to fix it, and can he fix this thing for me?

        It gets tricky when I have a problem, I lay everything out, and then…I start thinking out loud. That’s usually when my husband knows he can offer possible solutions.

      • hayeksplosives

        Glib men, heed our words. Sometimes women just need a listener who can sympathize and validate our point of view with a “yeah, that sucks,. Wanna pie?” Or something. Don’t take it as a personal quest. Just listen.

      • Hyperion

        Glib men.

        The best of men. God made everything in 6 days. And on the 7th day he said ‘Glib men, the best of men, men after my own way’.

      • nw

        Of course that rolls both ways. It’s not that it’s necessarily a personal quest,
        it’s that if you tell me something, my thought isn’t “yeah, that sucks”, it’s
        already going, “ok… here’s two or three approaches we might use to make things
        better”.

        I can’t even do dishes without my mind pondering how the process might be improved.

        There’s also somewhere the “if we’re not going to fix it, why are we wasting our time
        talking about it. sure, it sucks, lots of things do. I could be fixing something instead
        of talking about this.”

        I’ve learned though that I can generally just ask, “do you want me to help or just listen?”

      • Akira

        I’ve learned though that I can generally just ask, “do you want me to help or just listen?”

        I’m all down for lending a sympathetic ear; we all need that sometimes.

        I think the problem starts when someone is venting about the same problem for a prolonged time without making any efforts to remedy the situation. That can wear down the most sympathetic of ears over time.

    • Hyperion

      Move to SC or WV.

    • Hyperion

      “So now we are in Nevada.”

      Well, that’s a huge improvement over CA.

      • hayeksplosives

        Totally agree.

        I just think sometimes my husband wishes I were more passive and stupid. But then we wouldn’t be as financially ok as we are.

        Where are the movies showing men as the gold diggers?!?

      • Hyperion

        I dunno. He should wish you’re dominant in bed. Just kidding, I mean I don’t think that’s hot at all.

        Anyway, y’all can be Raiders fans now, so at least there is that.

      • slumbrew

        James Woods in Casino?

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      I quit being a drama boy, thenks HE!

    • Trigger Hippie

      Podunk White Trash Arm Chair Psychologist:

      He has begun to feel emasculated due to his declining health and your continued career success. Are these outbursts a sign of emotional immaturity or a run of the mill emotional response to becoming lesser? No idea. He’s “along for the ride” now and will have to adapt.

      P.S. I feel you regardless. Passive aggressive snark is one of my bugaboos. You have a problem? Voice it or piss off.

      Evolution is a MoFo.

      • hayeksplosives

        Lol,

        You’re not wrong.this is likely spot on.

        Yesterday when he was helping me move a heavy awkward item, he said “shit, I have to go backwards”. I immediately offered to switch with him, but he stubbornly stuck to it, then admitted he was scared of everything now—afraid of falling etc. That’s why we picked a flat house on a flat yard here.

        Now, the Minnesota house had stairs and the Cali house had stairs ANF a terraced yard. But in his mind he’d never have had the strokes and heart surgery if not for California. So in his heart of hearts he blames his near death on California and blames California on me.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        in my xp, with Wendy Grrrrr,

      • hayeksplosives

        I think that once the Cali house sells and I know the budget, I can maybe afford an apartment for him in Minnesota. That should help him decide what his priorities are.

        I still have 16-20 years to work. I’m not ready to slow down.

      • Chafed

        At the risk of angering you, I don’t have much sympathy for your husband. He chose not to work. He knows you make his lifestyle possible. You have been his biggest advocate and helper during his health problems. He gets to be wistful. He doesn’t get to be a jerk.

      • hayeksplosives

        No risk of angering me. And you’re right.

        I think his “artistic” sensibilities conflict with my “problem Sober” nature so that I just need to give him a wide berth sometimes.

        Unfortunately if I do something like sleep for the night int eh guest bedroom, he takes it as some kind of escalation.

        I think the dude just needs a hobby…

      • Trigger Hippie

        ‘So in his heart of hearts he blames his near death on California and blames California on me.’

        Ouch. That’s a tough row to hoe. Any relationship advice I could impart would be laughable so…all I can say is I hope you all find peace and happiness in the future. Keep the faith.

      • Gustave Lytton

        HE- I believe you mentioned its a bit May-December? My wife and I are that and it does affect things, more now than in the past. Fear of growing old, insecurity, abandonment, all of those may be in play as well, particularly given you’re the breadwinner these days. The other day she was shopping for a new laptop and trying to figure out which option was the right one and I asked about future use/intentions (use the same programs or wanted to do other stuff like video editing or photoshop) to figure out if it needed more memory or HD space. Well, she took it as I was implying she would be physically declining so wouldn’t be using it as much in the future. Not what I was saying at all, but it happened anyway.

      • hayeksplosives

        It’s always fun to be assigned opinions and thought processes one does not have in reality, isn’t it?

        Yeah, not only is he male but also older and technically a Boomer, so the gap seems wider now than it ever did before.

    • Hyperion

      “in which if we just went back in time to 2017 in Minnesota ”

      He’s just got his numbers and climate a little wrong.

      1977 in SC, yeah he got it. Fucking Greenville and Skynyrd, now we’re talking about it.l

      • hayeksplosives

        Lol,

        You’re not wrong.

      • Hyperion

        I absolutely am not wrong, for once…

  10. Hyperion

    The absolute worst doucherag besides The Atlantic:

    Horrific Doucherag

    • rhywun

      in the context of a country roiled by white racial resentment and systemic racism

      Taps out.

      Made it farther than I expected.

      But I don’t tolerate flat-out lies. Sorry, The Guardian.

  11. Hyperion

    Senior Citizen

    I always said I’d never strike a senior citizen. I’m going to make an exception here.

  12. Festus

    This story is AWESOME! I actually read it leaning forward in my seat. So tangible! So real! Nice work Trashy.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Gimme a ring Bro, I can’t call you,
      /Phone BS

    • Hyperion

      I’m not going to try to trigger the Trshmaster today.

      I got banned from an internet forum today for the first time in my entire life. After being a member for more than 10 years.

      I am not making this shit up. I got banned for saying ‘boobies’. Now it may be permanent after I went completely postal on the forum admin and called him a spineless pussy among other things. We’ll see after I check back tomorrow.

      • Brochettaward

        I’ve been banned from many internet forums. There is a lot of jealousy of my Firsting. I think the admin probably just wants you to stop pretending and admit you’re a fag.

      • Hyperion

        I actually spoke too fast, I got banned from Politico a long time ago. But they did me a favor.

        No problem with being a fag unless you’re the last guy on the planet, in which case I’m going back to being 100% hetero immediately.

        Peace, bro.

      • Mojeaux

        I got banned from a Mormon chat room after JFK Jr died for saying that old Joe Kennedy was a bootlegger, and that the sins of the father were being visited upon the sons. Granted, I was being cheeky, but my expulsion came after a whole bunch of people were aghast at the suggestion that a Kennedy was less than perfect.

      • Hyperion

        So, you got banned for speaking the truth?

        Same as me today, is saying ‘boobies’ bannable offense? That’s not why I got banned, just the reason they said. I got banned for telling the truth and a beta admin did not like it.

      • slumbrew

        That’s hilarious! If those Kennedy boys all looked like Danny DeVito they would have ended up in jail.

      • Mojeaux

        1. Be attractive.

        2. Don’t be unattractive.

      • slumbrew

        Precisely.

        Cue Tom in his tighty-whiteys.

      • Hyperion

        And if they looked like Brad Pitt, they would have got laid.

      • Festus

        I got perma-banned from Huff-Po by Ben Stiller. It was just a joke!!!

      • Hyperion

        You should be banned from everywhere for just posing on FluffPo.

  13. slumbrew

    Yay, the “infrastructure” bill past – a mere $1.2 trillion.

    Just $1,200,000,000,000.

    • Hyperion

      Manchin is getting his ass primarid or defeated and will never hold political office again, ever.

      • slumbrew

        Note this is the infrastructure bill – 13 Republicans voted for it – and not the social spending monstrosity they’re still going to try to force through.

      • Hyperion

        I hate every one of them with the passion of 1000 burning stars.

    • rhywun

      Cool. I guess we get to find out what’s in it now?

    • Chafed

      Ridiculous. Of course I haven’t seen a single major media outlet dig into the actual text of the bill. From what I have read, only a fraction is devoted to infrastructure.

    • slumbrew

      I think I speak fur all of us when I say:

      “Fuck you, cut spending.”

      • Chafed

        Yes. Yes you do.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Just past the house? Or also the Senate?

  14. Festus

    I’ve been squirreling about in my mind a story of vaccination. “Darryl felt no ill effects from the first dose. No more painful than when his elder brother caught him twice for flinching. The ache in his left shoulder was transitory. No need for the next jab until nearly February… Lots of things could happen before that.” The rest of the tale goes into Sugarfree realm. He gets a second dose and begins to grow strange lesions between his navel and groin, even at the small of his back. His hair thickens and he tans well. After enduring many Epsom salt baths to allay his skin condition he begins to pick at the one that he can reach. After some weeks the pustules seem to dry up and strange, reptilian scales appear. These areas became unbearably itchy to the point that Darryl rubbed his back against the spruce tree in the back yard. To find relief he decides to clip away the offending tissue using a pair of tweezers and an exacto knife from his hobby kit. He was so panicked that he never bothered to sterilize them. Picking, prying, every action a tortuous endeavor he begins to reveal what the second vaccination has wrought. A smooth, pink, glistening vulva. Darryl had achieved a front-hole. Equity was established!

    • Festus

      Drunken rambling first draft. My apologies.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Never apologize

      • Festus

        It has potential. Better writers could do something with it. Took me about twenty minutes.

    • rhywun

      I only get bits and pieces. The other day I walked past a stabbing tent that was blocking the sidewalk with a sign in front of it reading “Let’s bring back the city one vaccination at a time!” I envisioned myself as one of the survivors, coming across that sign again after it was all faded and torn, and laughing at the sentiment.

  15. Hyperion

    We’ll be counting stars

    I love this song.

    “I don’t think the world is sold on just doing what we’re told”

    There’s going to be trouble. We’re going down? You’re going down with us, assholes.

  16. Chafed

    The Making of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders (or whatever it’s called) is fantastic eye candy while listening to music and Glibbening.

    • Hyperion

      I can just to to Noreste and see better looking women than that walking down the street, every day.

      • Hyperion

        Nordeste. Would help if I could spell.

      • Chafed

        I want to move to your town.

      • Hyperion

        Redife? NO, not worth it. For vacation, yes.

      • Chafed

        Sex tourism here I come.

  17. Festus

    Guttfeld slamming it. He’s really come in to his own in the last few months. I watch his open during my break – https://youtu.be/vTQ2YpXxAsQ

    • Hyperion

      I just do not get if Cat is not going to take her clothes off, what is this show good for? I seriously do not get it.

      • slumbrew

        In theory, she’s not my type, at all.

        In practice, I find her dirty-sexy.

      • Hyperion

        Mine either. But I still want her to take her clothes off.

      • Gustave Lytton

        There’s something about her canines I find offputting.

      • Festus

        That’s the attraction. The fear factor. if you will. Much like Lisa Boothe.

  18. Hyperion

    I want to write. I mean a SciFi novel. Problem is I suck at writing. I seriously have some fantastic ideas, problem is that I just cannot express it in words.

    All of you here who are great at writing, I hate you, go to hell.

    • Akira

      It’s a tricky craft, fo sho.

      My issue was that I’d get what seemed like an amazing idea, start writing, keep at it for maybe a few days, get sidetracked by something else, then when I return to it a week later, it seems like the stupidest idea ever. Did I actually have a good idea and lose focus, or did I just come up with a stupid idea? I don’t know. I only completed one story, and I couldn’t help but see it as a giant mass of storytelling and composition errors.

      • Festus

        Yep. Great idea side-tracked by the next squirrel chattering on the tree. Focus is a hard task-mistress. I can’t do it. Stupid writes as stupid does.

    • Hyperion

      Sure, that’s totally happening.

      Or, I’ll take ‘Things that didn’t happen’ for 500, Alex.

    • rhywun

      And I was just thinking to myself, “What would an old Clinton flack have to say about the election?”

      Thanks, CNN!

  19. Gustave Lytton

    Trshy- loving the series. Can’t wait for moar. Also Balls Slashdick. Ozy’s was over too quickly.

    Random patent thought since I was tied up today. My company strongly wants patents, either for trolling or defend against trolls. It’s gone to 11 on the absurdity scale. Our CEO is one of the latest “inventors”. Well actually, there’s a group of names on the patent with the CEO as the lead for something that is an obvious concept and pretty sure has prior art. But was granted anyway.

  20. Ownbestenemy

    Thanks WhaHappen and BP. Good convo on the late night zoom. Really appreciate it.

  21. Old Man With Candy

    Glibs Gulch is forming. It’s Happening!

    And related to the earlier stuff. one of the most beautiful bits of poetry in the Bible is the rebuke Yahweh gives to Job. “Where were you when…”

    I still don’t understand why many Christians think (((we))) are too stupid to write allegory, but there are many things I don’t understand.

    • hayeksplosives

      The Book of Job is lost on many people, whether Christian, atheist, or (((you guys)))).

      I was fortunate enough to go to public high school in a well-funded town of about 22k people. The town was the original HQ of a well-known tech company, so the schools were flush with tax cash snd involved parents who cared about quality education.

      My high school “world literature” class included in-depth study of the Old Testament, from Genesis through Exodus. This material was served up right after we’d covered the Epic of Gilgamesh. I suppose you could call it “The Bible as Literature”, but I don’t know if even that would fly today.

      I think it’s entirely appropriate to teach in AP English, and I agree with those who classify ancient Israel as an important part of Western civilization.

      Like Greek mythology, it’s important to know the literature and culture that shape one’s own modern culture. Garden of Eden, Cain and Abel, Lot’s wife, Jacob wrestling the angel, the Ten Commandments, etc. one of my favorite bits was my Georgia-born teacher explaining that “gosh!” comes from the exclamation “Land of Goshen!” where the Israelites wandered on their way to the Promised Land.

      I don’t know how a person could study all that and not think (((they))) can write allegory.

  22. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    • Sean

      Mornin

  23. Not Adahn

    Latest sunrise of the year

    #DSTallthetime

    • UnCivilServant

      Look, New York is not the land of the midnight sun. The sun does rise here in the winter.

      • Not Adahn

        Yeah, but the sun will go down before I can get the dog to the park. Which closes at sundown.

    • Sean

      Hey y’all

      • UnCivilServant

        Morning.

        I’m back at work again after two sixteen hour days. Same server, almost done, then we have to sort out the backlog of batch jobs.

        I might end up with next week off at this rate…

      • Sean

        I prefer routine. That would drive me nuts.

  24. robodruid

    Moring all:
    Glad to you see you guys.

    • Tres Cool

      suh’
      Im diligently drinking, trying to see 2X of everyone.

    • Sean

      Doh!

    • Tres Cool

      Pfft. Only has 1 additional chin. To me, she’s anorexic.
      Would.

      • Tres Cool

        That is a fat kid. I bet Michael Jackson would titty-fuck him.

        /too much? too early?

      • Sean

        ?

    • rhywun

      I feel like I’ve seen this story before.

      • Tres Cool

        Well, I do have a thing for chubby news chicks.