UnCivil Marinade (And Brine)

by | Jan 25, 2022 | Cooking, LifeSkills, Recipes | 199 comments

Back in 2016, I bought a home vacuum sealer during my experiment with sous vide cooking. I’ve used it off and on for five years, but most of the time it sits at the back of the counter next to the stove. During my year end budgetary review I concluded I was spending way too much on food. Given the unreliability of deliveries, the short cycle grocery shopping was also prone to problems. I concluded I had to buy more bulk items to save on the ‘cooking for one’ surcharge from the smaller amounts I’d been buying. So I turned back to the trusty vacuum sealer. After the first round of partitioning larger packages, I looked at the juices that would seep out of proteins while in the vacuum bag and thought about marinading the meat rather than simply sealing it. But immediately on the tail of that thought was the realization that store-bought marinades would run into both the problem of cost and the issue of unwanted ingredients. So I figured I could experiment with making my own marinades.

Or rather, mostly brines.

Being ignorant, I didn’t realize just how much oil marinades took to make. The basic formula was a ratio of 3:1 oil:acid plus flavorants. I didn’t buy additional oil, so I just had my one bottle of peanut oil, which turned out to have slightly less than four cups of oil left in it.

I got three different proteins for the experiment – chicken, pork, and beef. A pretty common assortment. I’d always intended to brine the chicken. I’d intended to marinade the beef, but when I ran out of oil after handling the pork, I switched tracks.

Now, I used a common set of flavorants between the three, but with variations with each iteration.

Not appearing in this photoshoot – the fresh ingredients and the fish sauce.

Most of these were herbs and spices I had on hand. I bought fresh green onion, ginger paste, and lemongrass paste for the general marinades, as well as a red bell pepper. I’d also ordered an orange bell and an aloha pepper but apparently the store was out of those colors. (The hazards of pickup orders). I had some garlic left, and picked that up for the first round.

So, I started with brining the chicken.

Chicken Brine

UnCivil Chicken Brine

  • Vacuum Sealer
  • 1/2 Gallons Water
  • 1/2 Cups Salt
  • 1/2 Cups Fresh Chopped Green Onions
  • 1 Clove Garlic, Minced
  • 1/2 tsp Lemongrass Paste
  • 1/2 tsp Ginger Paste
  • 1/8 cup Fish Sauce
  • 1/4 tsp Black Pepper
  • 6 Chicken Thighs
  1. In a large container, mix all ingredients except chicken until salt is dissolved Heat if necessary

  2. In vacuum bag (or airtight container) place two thighs, ladle in enough brine to cover the chicken. If using an airtight container, more brine may be needed per chicken depending on the shape of your container

  3. Seal container

  4. Refrigerate for 24-48 hours to let flavors soak in

  5. Remove chicken from container. Bake, pan fry, or otherwise cook chicken as per personal preference.

  6. Don't spill on floor when serving

Dinner
American

Wow, that recipe image is tiny. Here’s the full image:

The red stain on the bag is from borscht that spilled in the fridge I apparently haven’t fully cleaned up.

I noticed one procedural difficulty when working on the chicken, ladling the liquid into the bags was a bit of a difficult dance. It would be so much easier if I could just pour a bottle into the bag. I was unable to find my cooking funnel, but I did find a glass bottle that once contained 16 oz of eggnog. I’d washed it out thoroughly after last using it, so it seemed like the perfect container to mix my marinades. I unfortunately ran out of garlic after the chicken. I’d also forgotten what seasoning I’d used before and didn’t want to look it up. So I looked in the cabinet and grabbed a bunch of what I had on hand. I also had to break down the individual strips of pork ‘ribs’. For the most part, the pork was boneless, but two of the five strips had bone at one end, so I cut all five in half, and put the two bone-in pieces in the same vacuum bag. But here’s the recipe:

UnCivil Marinaded Pork Ribs

Made with whatever was in the cupboard for flavoring

  • Vacuum Sealer
  • Bottle
  • 1/4 Cup Frech Chopped Green Onion
  • 1 Cup Peanut Oil
  • 1/3 Cup Lime Juice
  • 1 tbsp Fish Sauce
  • 1 1/2 tsp Salt (Used Himalayan Pink for this, but any salt will do)
  • 1/4 tsp Black Pepper
  • 1/4 tsp Ginger Paste
  • 1/4 tsp Lemongrass Paste
  • 1/8 tsp Adobo Seasoning
  • 1/8 tsp Smoked Paprika
  • 1/8 tsp Ground Cumin
  • 1/8 tsp Ground Sage
  • 1/8 tsp Tarragon Leaves
  • 1/2-2/3 lb Pork
  1. In the bottle, mix the non-pork ingredients. Don't forget any

  2. Place pork in vacuum bag or other airtight container.

  3. Seal container, removing as much air as possible

  4. Refrigerate for 24-48 hours

  5. Bake or pan fry pork until done, by your definition of done. This is not a BBQ recipe, so I don't think slow cooking will help it.

Dinner
American

The full image from the recipe:

Ribs?

Most distressingly, I ran low on oil while putting the pork together. I’d been planning to marinade the beef too, but without oil, it’s not a marinade. So the beef got the most experimental mix – an acid brine. I swapped out the oil for water and more salt. This may not turn out, but it’s experimental. I am also risking the most expensive protein of the mix. I don’t even remember the cut of beef, it was the one that was on sale. I also swapped out some of the seasonings. I had one bell pepper, which I diced and added to the mix for this. I have no idea if it turned out…

UnCivil Brined Beef

A marinade sans marinade

  • Vacuum Sealer
  • Bottle, 16 oz or more
  • 1/4 Cup Fresh Chopped Green Onion
  • 1/4 Red Bell Pepper, Diced
  • 1 Cup Water
  • 1/3 Cup Lemon Juice
  • 1/8 Cup Fish Sauce
  • 4 tsp, heaping Salt (I used Himalayan Pink, but any salt will do.)
  • 1/4 tsp Black Pepper
  • 1/4 tsp Ginger Paste
  • 1/4 tsp Lemongrass Paste
  • 1/4 tsp Dried Oregano
  • 1/8 tsp Smoked Paprika
  • 1/8 tsp Ground Cumin
  • 1/8 tsp Ground Sage
  • 1/8 tsp Tarragon Leaves
  • 1/2-2/3 lbs Beef
  1. Add all ingredients other than the beef to the bottle. Mix thoroughly.

  2. Place beef in vacuum bag or other airtight container

  3. Add seasoning mix and liquid to beef

  4. Remove as much air as possible and seal.

  5. Refrigerate 24-48 hours.

  6. Cook to your desired level of doneness. I know some of you will just gnaw on it straight out of the bag.

And here’s that tiny image made larger:

I notice these are getting more brown as I go along.

I have only had the honor of tasting the chicken. It was delicious, and retained more juices than other preparation methods.

About The Author

UnCivilServant

UnCivilServant

A premature curmudgeon and IT drone at a government agency with a well known dislike of many things popular among the Commentariat. Also fails at shilling Books

199 Comments

  1. db

    Nice Spoon!

    • WTF

      That may be one of the greatest things I’ve ever heard.

    • Chipping Pioneer

      That is great.

    • DEG

      OH YEAH

    • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

      Guaranteed to piss off all the right people.

    • rhywun

      OK, this once I’ll take a listen.

      Dayum!

    • Sean

      Let’s go Brandon!

  2. ron73440

    Is it difficult to seal the bags without pulling the liquid out?

    • The Other Kevin

      Looks like he’s using a Food Saver. Mine has an option to just seal without sucking the air out.

      • ron73440

        I did not know that was an option.

        I keep wanting to buy one, but I don’t know if I’ll use it enough.

        Using it for marinating would be nice.

      • Nephilium

        Yeah. You can also do some vacuum to get some/most of the air out, then seal it. If you get liquid in the spot where you’re trying to seal, the heat bar won’t get hot enough to seal the bag.

      • db

        I’ve got mine to seal even when wet, but it probably takes longer and risks the seal not being as good.

      • juris imprudent

        High probably of seal failure if you go to heat the contents in hot water. Don’t ask how I know.

      • Tundra

        Worth every dime, especially if you buy meat in bulk.

      • TARDis

        I wear mine out after every BBQ day and trip to Costco.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Regardless, you will use it enough. Buy quality though. FoodSaver is OK, but expect failure and maintenance about 1 year in.

      • db

        My FoodSaver is about 10 years old–no maintenance or failure so far. Granted, it was used only lightly for the first 6 or 7 years, but it’s been used quite a bit in the last 3.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Oh the older models were great. Now? Use to failure, buy again.

      • TARDis

        My first one lasted less than 3 years, but the second is still going after about 6.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I have a cheapo Amazon one. I can throw it away and buy 2 more before getting to the price of a FoodSaver.

      • db

        So does mine. You can also hit the “seal” button at any point, so as soon as you see liquid getting to the sealing area you can stop the vacuum and begin sealing.

      • ron73440

        You guys are talking me into it.

        What’s a good model to buy?

      • db

        I like my FoodSaver–I don’t know the model, but it has lasted me a good while. There may be better ones out there.

      • db

        Food Saver also has some reusable canisters that can be connected via a vacuum hose to the machine and vacuum sealed as well.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        I have a NESCO VS-02. It’s held up over a year of constant use.

      • The Other Kevin

        Mine is an older model, but if you go to the web site it’s similar to the smaller/cheaper one. I don’t use mine every day, but it is good to have around. Mostly for sous vide, and sometimes we buy in bulk. For example, the other day we bought a 30 pound case of bacon and used the Food Saver to divide it into 12 packs for the freezer. And Mrs. TOK tends to count her macros so for travel we make snack packs of weighed-out nuts and cheese. You can also re-seal bags of chips and other snacks.

      • Sean

        a 30 pound case of bacon

        ?

      • db

        So, TOK, would you care to adopt me?

      • The Other Kevin

        Already adopted 3, and two are out of the house. And it’s nice. But if you live near Michigan, the place is called Lowery’s Meat and Seafood, in Buchanan MI. That case cost $99.

      • l0b0t

        I have a Food Saver. I found it in the clearance section of Bed, Bath, Beyond as a returned item. With their wonderfully liberal coupon policy, it was only $9. If you’re not in a rush, keep an eye out for deals.

    • PieInTheSky

      there are vacuum machines that can handle wet stuff and others that cannot

      • Aloysious

        ‘Vacuum machine’ is an odd nickname for Winston’s Mom.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Some have special bags and a separate attachment to do marinades

  3. The Other Kevin

    I like making my own marinades and rubs. It’s usually cheaper and better for you. There’s less sodium and no mystery filler ingredients. If I need to make a BBQ rub or taco seasoning, I just google it and the top result is usually pretty good.

    My go to beef marinade is:
    Olive oil
    Balsamic vinegar
    Salt
    Pepper
    Oregano
    Red Pepper Flakes
    Garlic Powder

    Of course, all “to taste”, meaning I just throw it together and never measure anything.

  4. Sean

    If you’re not fresh grinding your pepper from whole peppercorns, then you are doing it wrong.

    Get a pepper mill, dude.

    Thanks for sharing the article. 🙂

    • Nephilium

      You can say that about most spices.

      • Sean

        True. The only two I care enough about though are nutmeg and pepper.

      • Rat on a train

        Ginger paste? Heresy!

      • Sean

        I’ll bet the lemon or lime juice wasn’t even fresh squeezed!

      • rhywun

        From organically-raised boutique lemon and lime trees in your backyard.

      • Rat on a train

        Do your trees support BLM?

      • Ted S.

        Black Limes Matter?

      • DEG

        As long as there are no lemon stealing whores.

      • PieInTheSky

        not turmeric. I tried fresh turmeric once. it stained my grater my cutting board and my fingers

    • PieInTheSky

      or a mortar and pestle

    • Toxteth O'Grady

      You are all correct.

      I don’t know what organic citrus would entail, but as Fred Mertz says while in Hollywood, “The oranges know what to do!”

      +2 muscade et poivrons

    • UnCivilServant

      I actually own a peppermill.

      Trying to grind out a measured amount is a hassle.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Spice grinder does wonders if needing more than a TSP or TBSP

      • db

        Check these out. I have a small silicone funnel that slips over the bottom of my pepper mill and fits in the top of these, so I can grind a precise amount when needed without waste.

      • ron73440

        People measure pepper?

        I always guesstimate with the grinder and err on the side of more than it calls for.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Making s spice rub I sure do

  5. rhywun

    Interesting – I never thought of vacuum sealing for marinading. I have only used it for preservation in the freezer.

    • juris imprudent

      Can also be used for quick pickling – or so I’ve seen on Beat Bobby Flay. Have not tried that myself.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Quick pickling is great. And I also learned from Flay.

  6. Nephilium

    Issue with large batches of pre-seasoned food in my house is the flavor preferences between the girlfriend and myself. What I consider mild to medium, she considers inedible.

    • ron73440

      I have the same problem with my wife.

      She’ll make Korean Fried Chicken and put sauce on hers, then add pepper paste to the sauce for mine.

    • rhywun

      Taste buds can be trained, if the will is there.

      I’m talking about yours, of course.

      • ron73440

        I’ve been working on training hers.

        Years ago, she wouldn’t have been able to eat the “mild” version of the Korean Chicken.

      • Nephilium

        When the girlfriend and I first started dating, she said that pepperoni was spicy. I’ve at least gotten her to the point where she’ll step outside of ordering the mildest thing at Indian restaurants, and will eat some things that are on the mild side for me.

      • ron73440

        pepperoni was spicy

        My wife wasn’t that bad, but I did have a friend from Minnesota who was on that level.

      • Nephilium

        I’ve gotten her up to medium store bought salsa and the like. But even she mocks the concept of extra mild salsa.

      • R.J.

        My daughter is the same way. Anything other than bland is spicy. Even basil tomato sauce she thinks is “spicy.”

      • UnCivilServant

        From what? The tomato?

        Get some of Sean’s reapers and mix them in the next batch.

      • Sean

        One diced pepper per jar of sauce is just about right.

    • Rat on a train

      My wife likes ampalaya and tamarind which are too much for me. When she is in the mood, she makes dishes just for her. The kids and I eat something else.

      • Nephilium

        I used to be able to do that when the girlfriend went out of town to visit her aunt and the like. The past two years, that hasn’t happened…

  7. westernsloper

    Those look good. Lemon grass is an underrated ingredient. It is hard to find here.

    • l0b0t

      Sloper, keep an eye out for the Gourmet Garden brand (pictured in article) or Lighthouse brand (dehydrated); they should be in the produce section of your market. I know Lighthouse distributes nationally.

      • westernsloper

        We have Gourmet Garden here and I always have their basil paste on hand. I have never seen lemon grass paste stocked. Now I want to make a Laksa.

    • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

      I can get fresh lemongrass, but the quality’s inconsistent.

      I’ve tried powdered lemongrass originating from Vietnam and from Central America. For my money, the Vietnamese stuff is miles ahead of the Central American stuff, so much so that I’ll go without if all I can find is the Central American stuff.

    • Lackadaisical

      Yes, great flavor.

  8. PieInTheSky

    next, a yogurt marinade

    • juris imprudent

      That’s my go-to for chicken, particularly for thighs.

      • Not Adahn

        Yogurt + vindaloo powder.

  9. db

    Theodore Edgecomb, under direct questioning by his own attorney, just destroyed his self-defense legal defense by claiming the gun “just went off.” Accident is legally distinct from active self defense. I don’t think he can get both.

    • ron73440

      Sounds like they have chosen their cake, and must lie in it.

      That won’t work very well, I believe.

    • Lackadaisical

      Who?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Dude who shot an attorney in the face after an altercation just prior.

      • db

        Frankly I think he could have had a good case for self defense–if he could articulate that he was being attacked and feared for his life because he might be knocked or thrown down 20 feet of stairs or over the railing of the bridge.

        The defense utterly failed to evince testimony from him that would support that fear. Instead they focused on him being afraid of systemic racism as a justification for him running out of state for six months.

      • ron73440

        him being afraid of systemic racism

        Should have lead with that.

        NOT GUILTY!

      • db

        His defense did lead with that pretty heavily in opening arguments.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I am sure the contanst Hard R over and over wasn’t coached at all. Plus he felt the heat from that Kia Soul!

      • db

        And it’s roaring engine. Thing must have had glass packs.

      • db

        its.

    • EvilSheldon

      Yup. You can’t accidentally defend yourself. If he didn’t intend to shoot, then it logically follows that he wasn’t justified in shooting, or in having the gun out at all.

      This might have been deliberate – self-defense claim is falling apart, so try to give the jury an out to convict on a lesser charge.

      • db

        Listening to the testimony, it didn’t seem like any of it was deliberate, except for the parts where he kept trying to answer every questions with “I took actions necessary to defend myself” to unrelated yes or no questions.

  10. Aloysious

    No marinating gloves? What is going on around here. ?

    Well done. Thank you.

  11. TARDis

    Fish sauce?
    Lemongrass?

    Never tried those before. They all sound and look tasty, UCS. But where are the finished product photos?

    • UnCivilServant

      It was a rushed article at Tulip’s request. Most of these are in my freezer since I’ve driven out of state.

      • Tulip

        Thank you! It all looks good.

      • UnCivilServant

        You’re welcome.

        I’m no expert on these cooking techniques, so this represents most of my accumulated understanding.

    • UnCivilServant

      I have at least had the chance to taste each type since then. The chicken and the pork were the most successful from a flavor and moisture prospective. The beef brine was very effective at infusing the flavor of bell pepper into the beef. The only other flavor I got out of it was salt. So I felt I wasted a lot of other ingredients if those two stole the whole show.

    • juris imprudent

      Word of warning with fish sauce (assuming it’s the Thai stuff) – use sparingly.

      • UnCivilServant

        Mine was vietnamese, but yes, it has a… erm… pronounced flavor.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Phu Quoc is the good shit. But like Ron has found, there’s a reason it’s banned from passenger luggage on some airlines.

      • UnCivilServant

        I was limited to what was available at the Asian Grocery (I wish they’d picked something else as the name of their store, because it sounds like I don’t remember or can’t pronounce it when they store is literally named ‘Asian Grocery’)

      • ron73440

        And don’t drop a bottle inside your pantry.

        Cleaning the glass and liquid was easy, but the smell, it lingered for a while.

  12. db

    Oh man, Edgecomb is utterly destroying his own defense, under direct questioning by HIS OWN ATTORNEY.

    • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

      Mebbe he’s going for the “dumb SOB” defense, ’cause that works so well.  /tongue-in-cheek

    • Ownbestenemy

      Yeah when you have that level of detail it makes the story unbelievable.

      He actually claimed he thought of Arbery in that moment. Fuck off, no one knew about that case at that time for the most part.

    • Ownbestenemy

      This is painful. “Can you repeat that question”

  13. Tundra

    Looks really good, UCS! Thanks for the recipes!

  14. Ownbestenemy

    Interesting you used peanut oil…I would aim for something more neutral.

    Good stuff UCS

    • UnCivilServant

      It was the only oil I had on hand.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Wasn’t knocking it

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Stay based UCS, no seed oils.

  15. rhywun

    On Tuesday, Adams insisted that the masking requirement isn’t a burden, pitching it as a way to keep students and teachers healthy without adding restrictions.

    In an article with a photograph of the asshole clearly in public not wearing a mask.

    Go fuck yourself.

    If I had a child I would need to be restrained right about now.

    • l0b0t

      Yeah, but sometimes their mother is a teacher who is all in on the nonsense, in no small part to make her ex angry.

      • rhywun

        Sorry

        But yeah this is clearly all about the teachers being terrified of the children. All the bullshit posturing from the politicians is an attempt to cover for them.

        It’s sickening. And I love how there is always a sad pic of a classroom and there are multiple kids not wearing their feedbags properly because a classroom with everyone wearing them properly doesn’t exist. Where are the stacks of dead teachers being hidden??

      • EvilSheldon

        Terrified? Nah. Lazy fucks wanting to continue to cash checks for not working.

      • UnCivilServant

        They’re not even doing that. They probably have direct deposit.

      • DEG

        Sorry.

      • Mojeaux

        Here. Have a {{{hug}}}.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Not that he doesn’t deserve scorn and hate, but that’s basically just a stock photo of him.

      • rhywun

        Maybe it’s the Post being cheeky.

  16. DEG

    This looks good. Thanks!

    On a related note: It’s National Irish Coffee Day. I was going to abstain from alcohol until the weekend, but on second thought, time for a some boozy coffee.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Boozy coffee isn’t really drinking. Count it as a wash

    • Rat on a train

      I don’t drink coffee. I will make my Irish tea Irish in support of my coffee drinking comrades.

      • Nephilium

        If you’re going with tea, there’s a cocktail recipe I’ve got kicking around somewhere saved that’s a tea based drink that calls for Irish breakfast tea, a bar spoon of strawberry jam, and (IIRC) Irish whiskey. That may work better then trying to float heavy whipping cream on top of your tea.

      • DEG

        That sounds delicious.

      • Rat on a train

        I normally go the hot toddy route. I wonder how it would be if instead of whiskey and honey I used mead.

  17. R C Dean

    Dedthred from Grummun:

    Dean, if you’re still hanging around: when you took the shotgun classes, what fraction of students were using pump guns vs. semi-autos?

    I think it was about 50/50.

    • EvilSheldon

      Interesting!

      I was a very early adopter of self-loaders for fighting shotguns. It’s nice to see them getting more popular.

      • R C Dean

        That’s pretty impressionistic. I didn’t notice one type more than the other. Coulda been 60/40 either way.

      • Drake

        What class? Was it worthwhile?

      • R C Dean

        The two day shotgun class.

        Then, the four-day shotgun class.

        Both are worthwhile. If you have the time/energy (and are familiar with/confident with your shotgun), the four-day would be the way to go.

        Warning: Front Sight has a seriously goofy membership model, which they are in the process of revamping. Good luck navigating that.

      • juris imprudent

        As in, the owner has just shit on everyone that invested in life memberships. By all appearances he runs the thing like a Ponzi.

      • R C Dean

        I think the membership-gets-you-free-training-forever model was pretty Ponzi.

        We looked over the new structure, and are going to re-up for the year. My take: we already pretty much got the value for our membership fee (I think we were in for $1,000 each, and have around 8 -10 days of training for that). I think the value is still there even with the new fees (if you are a member, $500/year, plus $50/day for training), if you go to at least 4 days of training per year (which we are planning to do). The kicker may be that you have to buy their ammo, and regardless of what they claim, it ain’t cheap.

        We’ll see.

        The owner is kind of a nut. One of my fellow shotgunners summed it up as “He always shoots for the moon, and maybe gets low earth orbit”. The word “Ponzi” was also bandied about.

  18. UnCivilServant

    It’s been at least five hours since breakfast, so I’ve got to go and find myself lunch. I will be back (how soon depends on what kind of food I turn up)

  19. Old Man With Candy

    What marinade would one use for heads in the freezer?

    Asking for a friend.

    • R C Dean

      Bone in?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I would use a citric acid base before a slow-cook process.

    • EvilSheldon

      Hydrofluoric acid. Failing that, lye and boiling water.

      • UnCivilServant

        We’re trying to build a flavor profile here. Those are awful flavorants.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Dude, no HFL. Too much opportunity for permanent personal injury.

        Keep it organic with beetles and incineration afterwards.

      • EvilSheldon

        I never thought about beetles. Good i’ve .

      • Not Adahn

        HFL

        Floridic acid is dangerous stuff.

      • R C Dean

        Back it up, folks. For what purpose are we, err, marinating?

        If its more “disposal”, well, OMWC should have stayed in Phoenix. Two words:

        Hole. Desert.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I believe the preferred NY approach involves waterways and concrete forms.

    • Tundra

      No pineapple. It makes pork mushy, so I gotta believe it would do the same to long pork.

    • Tulip

      Your employee on the lam escalated quickly.

      • Sean

        lol

      • UnCivilServant

        Note to self, do not hide from the law at OMWC Cafe

    • Not Adahn

      Typically, they use a dry-rub, not a marinade.

      • juris imprudent
  20. Not Adahn

    Alles NICHT in Ordnung!

    Vögtlin sent my quote request to their US distributor who sent it to their NY partner (based out of Cheektowaga) who then had to use the quote-generator software at the mothership in Muttenz… but they have already closed for the day.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      How very German

      • Not Adahn

        Swiss. But apparently on the border, since the little map-pointer thingy is clearly in Germany.

    • UnCivilServant

      Software closes for the day?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s union software.

      • Not Adahn

        The employee who supervises the blinkenlights on the server only works banker’s hours.

    • R C Dean

      I’m curious – how does software close for the day?

      • Not Adahn

        After they’re done tidying up the office at the end of the day, they unplug all the computers to save electricity.

    • rhywun

      Sort of apropos… we partner with an agency in Sweden (just a minor bit of business) and I’ve gotten an earful from a coworker who works with them about how unbelievably lazy they are. For example, no one in their office got around to assisting us in programming our integration with their data last year. By the time November rolled around they basically said nobody would get to it until maybe June this year. IIRC it’s partly because they’re on vacation all the time.

      • Lackadaisical

        +1 four-day, 6-hour work week

    • The Other Kevin

      “COVID-19 antibody drugs from Regeneron and Eli Lilly should no longer be used because they don’t work against the omicron variant that now accounts for nearly all U.S. infections, U.S. health regulators said Monday.”

      I can kind of understand this, but it’s also my understanding that the vaccines don’t work against omicron either. Am I right about that?

      • Compelled Speechless

        Treatments for illness cause vaccine hesitancy. Hesitancy must NOT be allowed. If it could be treated without an (arguably ineffective) experimental gene therapy that the government is now contracted to buy near infinite quantities of in perpetuity at an price undisclosed to the tax payer, someone will lose money and power. What don’t you understand!?!?!

      • R C Dean

        See, if you were a celebrity medical spokesmodel, you’d know why it makes perfect sense to suspend a failing treatment, but not a failing vaccine.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Yes, you are right about that.

        But Omicron specific boosters are coming!

        We’re saved!

      • Compelled Speechless

        It’s a perfect scheme to.
        1) Wait for new variant to show itself. Develop and produce vaccine and make gov’t commit to buying unholy quantities of it at a price that doesn’t need to reflect realities of the market.
        2) Allow the variant to burn itself out naturally in the wild.
        3) Release “vaccine” and claim it is solely responsible for the decrease in infections of that variant. Really enjoy your victory lap!!!
        4) Rinse and repeat.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The key is the EUA.

        Without it, they need to be on the childhood vaccine schedule in order to keep their liability protection.

        They won’t dare sell a single vial without that.

      • R C Dean

        I’m sure Pfizer has rubber stamps with the signatures of all the necessary officials in their office already.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        The battle over the childhood vaccine schedule is going to be epic. Pfizer desperately wants it, but resistance is growing to the idea of jabbing your kids every year with experimental therapies.

      • Gustave Lytton

        No it isn’t! Goddamn it. Enough of this bullshit.

        The liability protection is from the countermeasures declaration, which does not rely on EUA status. It can and is applied to fully licensed drugs.

        There I are several areas where the licensing and EUA do not overlap, such as for younger children. That is good possible reason for why the EUA versions are still being continued. Along with minimizing costs, of existing inventory and retooling.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Okay fair enough, the EUA allows usage and the Prep Act creates the liability shield.

        But without the EUA they can’t use the vaccines as countermeasures unless they switch over to fully approved Comirnaty, however the fuck that got thru five years of safety testing and review in under 18 months.

      • UnCivilServant

        Isn’t that out of order? Doesn’t the process go mandate – produce – distribute – test?

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        As far as I can tell. The more reports I read, the more it appears that Omicron is almost completely in vaccine escape mode, and is “enjoying” the benefits of what may be early signs of ADE and/or OAS to boot.

        Yay us. We’re so smaht.

      • Nephilium

        I saw a headline in my newsfeed today warning that contracting Omicron won’t protect you from other variants. I wasn’t interested enough to click through to read the fear mongering.

      • Drake

        The FDA announcement is free of any data – They just assert that the antibody drugs don’t work, the really expensive and dangerous failed cancer and AIDS drugs work great, as do the vaccines. All without any numbers.

        Pfizer’s marketing department could have written the announcement (and probably did). Probably wrote this one too

      • Ozymandias

        What we’re witnessing is the pharma wars by proxy. The FDA is owned by the biggest of the big – Pfizer – along with a few others.
        This is the battle over entry into the US market for the entire US citizenry, since we’re all now able to be compelled to take experimental treatments.
        What you’re witnessing is Pfizer consolidating its position. There will be no upstarts getting access to their COVID treasure trove.
        Legally, it’s also a threat because of how 21 USC 360bbb-3 (the EUA statute) is worded. Any comparable “therapeutic” would render the EUA for the Pfizer vaccines illegitimate. (See sub. sec, (c)(3) under the “EUA Requirements.”)

      • R C Dean

        I’ll be interested to see what happens with Pfizermectin and IverMercktin.

      • The Other Kevin

        They discovered a magic spigot out of which pours a stream of money greater than they ever imagined. No way in hell they’re giving that up without a fight.

      • Tundra

        So when does the fight start?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Soon, I hope.

      • Lackadaisical

        We’ve been on the ropes since before they rang the bell.

  21. R.J.

    I liked this article. Reminded me I could really use a vacuum sealer.

  22. The Late P Brooks

    I can rarely motivate myself to prepare anything more complicated than peanut butter and crackers.

    • UnCivilServant

      How do you manage to eat?

  23. Certified Public Asshat

    #BREAKING IMF urges El Salvador to remove Bitcoin as legal tender pic.twitter.com/QGnN5aoHMt— AFP News Agency (@AFP) January 25, 2022

    And when has the IMF ever been wrong.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    I just found out (via her family Christmas letter) my masked/vaxxed/boosted sister and her masked/vaxxed/boosted daughter got the plague a few weeks ago. Fortunately it was mild. both of them are more than slightly overweight.

    Nobody talks to me about this topic anymore.

    • R C Dean

      Nobody talks to me about this topic anymore.

      Bliss.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    How do you manage to eat?

    With my fingers, mostly.

  26. Ownbestenemy

    And just like that, Edgecomb admits it was an accident, going completely contrary to his claims he shot to defend himself.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Tilting at windmills

    As the world grapples with a worsening climate change crisis, governments and companies are pledging to achieve net-zero greenhouse emissions by 2050 — a goal that will require an extra $3.5 trillion a year in capital spending, according to estimates from a McKinsey & Company report released on Tuesday.

    That amount is the equivalent of half of global corporate profits, one-quarter of total tax revenue, or 7% of household spending in 2020.

    “The net-zero transition will amount to a massive economic transformation,” said Mekala Krishnan, a partner at the McKinsey Global Institute and the lead author of the report.

    “Nobody move, or the nigger gets it.”

    • rhywun

      The size and scope of this racket is going to make the plague response look like child’s play.

      And I am afraid that the human race will eagerly impoverish itself in order to enrich these assholes (again).

  28. The Late P Brooks

    What or who is Edgecomb?

  29. Tundra

    New JRE with JBP

    4 hours and 13 minutes!!

    I’ve listened to the first hour or so. The lefties that hated Rogan and Peterson are going to lose their minds.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      As soon as Peterson started talking about why climate models are unreliable, I was thinking “here we go.”

    • UnCivilServant

      I’m sick of patching Java Runtime Environments. Is that an exploit patch, or just some new feature we’ll never use?

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Keeping global temperatures from surpassing the 1.5 degrees Celsius target under the Paris Climate agreement would require the world to nearly halve emissions within the next decade and reach net-zero emissions by 2050, according to the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change.

    But the world has already warmed roughly 1.1 degrees Celsius above preindustrial levels and is on track to see global temperature rise of 2.4 degrees Celsius by the century’s end.

    The cost of climate change will be severe if no action is taken. For instance, a report from insurance giant Swiss Re estimates that climate change could cut the global economy by $23 trillion by 2050, essentially shaving off about 11% to 14% from global economic output.

    Garbage in, garbage out.

    Without the global warming “analytical” template, the panicdemic would never have gotten off the ground.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    “The economic transition to achieve net-zero will be complex and challenging, but our findings serve as a clear call for more thoughtful, urgent, and decisive action, to secure a more orderly transition to net zero by 2050,” said Dickon Pinner, a senior partner at McKinsey and co-leader of McKinsey Sustainability.

    “The question now,” Pinner said, “is whether the world can act boldly and broaden the response and investment needed in the upcoming decade.”

    And this is how you pull an imaginary rabbit from an imaginary hat.

    PRESTO!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      complex and challenging

      That’s a cute way of saying “You’re probably going to starve to death.”

    • juris imprudent

      said Dickon Pinner

      OK you fooled me, this was really a Bee article.

    • R C Dean

      to secure a more orderly transition to net zero by 2050

      Unless you go all nuclear, this will require the discovery of battery technology that we don’t even envision at the moment.

      And that doesn’t include the transport sector.