Corrector Novus Occidentis – 9

by | Mar 8, 2022 | Fiction | 268 comments

The Second Seal is Broken – part I

An Isolated Incident IIIIII The First Seal is Broken IIIIII, IV, V

It would turn out the only decent print on the glass was the bartender. There had been some debate about extrapolating from the partial and smeared prints that may have been Conor’s, but the likelihood of getting anything remotely reliable was too low, even just for background intel and would certainly never hold up in court. Nor were any epithelials harvested from the rim of the glass, but there were microscopic traces of latex, a barrier to prevent the shedding of skin cells on the glass. There was essentially no physical evidence of Conor’s existence and Frank wasn’t surprised by that.

What troubled Frank was the chance encounter, that he couldn’t quite accept as chance. Everything he had learned about CNO told him chance was not a key element of their operation. He also found himself subject to some long and detailed questioning from other members of the task force. They wondered too about the chances of it being random, and if it wasn’t random, Frank, what made you of interest to him? The grilling ended after many hours over several days when finally Deputy Director Fuller had stepped in and announced that enough was enough. Frank didn’t know Fuller and he would end up wondering why he had intervened, not that he wasn’t appreciative of the respite from suspicion. His father’s comment about “knowing your own operations” had left Frank with the idea that someone inside the FBI (in the past or even currently) may be part of the CNO. That he had been approached in such proximity had made that seem even more plausible/troubling. He wondered if anyone else had been approached, and not reported it – that was an even more troubling thought, for they might report back out that Frank had.

A couple of more weeks passed, with no breaks in the case, and as everyone on the task force was quietly thankful for – no additional attacks. It was frustrating having no good leads, but no one wanted anything new to come up, even if a lead might come out of it. Equally, everyone knew that there would be more, that this wasn’t just over. On a Thursday afternoon, Frank was called into Deputy Director Fuller’s office. Fuller directed Frank to sit in one of the chairs facing Fuller’s desk. They were the only two in the office. A few pleasantries were exchanged.

Fuller spoke, “I’m sure you can imagine the political pressure we are under to make progress on this case. Such pressure that we’ve been given the green light for some unconventional actions. One of those courses of action involves you Frank.”

Frank nodded and Fuller continued, “CNO seems to have some interest in you, at least that is your own guess and mine as well. Are you willing to attempt an infiltration if the opportunity arises? I don’t have to tell you of the danger; that we can’t run you as close as we would any other confidential informant. The risk would be enormous; of course, so would the pay-off. We’ve had zero success in identifying anyone on the inside, not even anyone who knows anything about one of them. I personally would never consider putting an agent at the risk I’m asking you to take on, but I think you know as well as everyone else on the task force – risks need to be taken.”

Frank took it all in, which honestly was a bit overwhelming. It also occurred to him that there was no other person in the room, not even one of the seniors on the task force. Frank asked, “why isn’t this being run down the line? Shouldn’t the chain of command know?”

Fuller grinned, “that’s part of the risk. Your possible role outside has to be invisible to the team inside. If everyone knows, it may effect the investigation; worse, they may rely on you. Hell, we don’t really know that you’ll get a second approach, do we?”

Frank nodded but added “he did say I’d buy next time we met.”

Fuller said, “I’m kinda counting on that. I don’t like hope as a plan, but if the opportunity comes and we can seize it”, shrugged and continued “so you can see, this is you, on your own – I’m the only one at my level that knows, and no one else between you and me can. And obviously no one, not your family, friends, no one can have the slightest idea. Even above me, your identity wasn’t disclosed, just that an agent had been approached.”

Frank quietly weighed this, then asked “what are the other unconventional actions being contemplated?”

Fuller leaned back and slowly said, “you don’t really have a need to know that.”

Frank smirked a little, but the thought about CNO’s understanding of FBI operations jumped back at him and obviously things out of the ordinary were exactly what was needed. His face expressed a grim earnestness as he said “alright, I’ll do it”.

Fuller’s face was a mask, “no, not so fast. You haven’t considered this as thoroughly as you need to. I want you to have plenty of time to think it through. You’ll give me your answer on Monday.  In all honesty, I don’t expect you to do it because it’s damn close to a suicide mission.”

About The Author

juris imprudent

juris imprudent

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire." --Winston Churchill

268 Comments

  1. Suthenboy

    My first day back and I get a first? Huh.

    • juris imprudent

      Couldn’t happen to a better person.

    • Brochettaward

      It’s nice to see that someone around here besides me knows how to First.

  2. Suthenboy

    Good stuff Juris.

    • rhywun

      Are you caught up?? There are 8 previous parts.

      • Suthenboy

        Not entirely and I am too tired now. I have one foot on the bed and the other on a banana peel.

      • rhywun

        Well understood, dude.

  3. slumbrew

    Your writing keeps getting stronger, JI.

    I’m enjoying these a lot.

  4. Yusef drives a Kia

    Intensity intensifies, good Stuff!

  5. rhywun

    Ooo, this is getting good. 🙂

  6. CPRM

    OT, but fun NFL news.
    Broncos Fan Reacts to Aaron Rodgers…Russell Wilson Trade!!!

  7. Fourscore

    I couldn’t put this article down, JI, same as a book review. I wish there was more than 1 Tuesday in a week. At this point I am totally directionless, no idea and I’m snared. Thanks, JI.

  8. Tres Cool

    Im off to work, kids
    Leave a light on for me.

  9. Suthenboy

    Good night all.

    • Tundra

      Sleep well. Glad you are back with us.

      • mindyourbusiness

        Good to see you again, Suthen.

  10. rhywun

    OT sportsball rant.

    NYC FC are playing a “home” game in East Hartford, CT in the North American equivalent of Champions League against a team from Guatemala.

    Last week they played a “home” game in Los Angeles.

    It is amazing that all the petrodollars that also fund the Manchester City juggernaut haven’t found their way into a fucking stadium for NYC FC. Especially after they won MLS Cup last year.

    Their usual “home” stadium is Yankee Stadium, and last I heard there isn’t any baseball or am I crazy?

    • CPRM

      Do they have unvaxxed players? Cuz NYC still won’t let Kyree play for the Nets at home, could be that.

      • rhywun

        Ah, I hadn’t thought of that. I don’t watch pre-game shit where that might come up but that sounds like the probable cause.

        It’s a weird reversal where the more celebrity you are, the more they enforce an illegal diktat.

        I am quite certain that the guys running the bodegas and liquor stores around me are not being followed around by the vaccine police.

      • CPRM

        The butt-hurt in the sports world was palpable when they found out Rodgers was unclean. HE LIED! There is still a ‘SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GET THE SHOT!’ tint most times Kyree is talked about. You could hear it easing up when people thought NYC was going to lift restrictions like other places, but then it doubled up when he didn’t.

      • rhywun

        It’s just pure vindinctiveness. Every other local restriction has been lifted except this one that apparently only applies to sports figures. Oh, and plague vector children under five or some shit.

    • Tundra

      Wild are schooling the Rangers.

      After all the losses, I’m ecstatic.

      • rhywun

        Ouch. I was focusing on soccer, but… yikes. Well, the Rangers schooled Winnipeg the other night so *shrugs*.

      • rhywun

        I wonder if Georgiev (sp?) started. He’s kind of… not good. Nice kid but…

    • slumbrew

      Contra argument:

      This matches were scheduled months ago, no?

      Just because baseball is fucking themselves, that’s no reason to make a last-minute venue change for the soccer games.

      People already bought their tickets and made their travel plans.

      • rhywun

        Maybe there was supposed to be a baseball game at Yankee Stadium tonight; I dunno. I do think that NYC FC is by a pretty wide margin the most mis-run team in the league. They are an afterthought of the organization that runs Man City and it shows.

        We sometimes play “home” games at our biggest rival’s stadium (New Jersey Red Bulls), FFS.

      • slumbrew

        I’m not sure the Revolution are “mis-run”, but they’re definitely an afterthought for the Krafts (for understandable reasons).

        In their defense: the Krafts have pushed, for years, for a dedicated 20k soccer stadium in a couple of locations – Dorchester, in particular. The problem is, as ever, the local governments with their hands out.

        The Krafts built Gillette Stadium with (almost) no “public” funds (they had some road work done on the public dime). It’s now one of the most valuable NFL teams, period.*

        The local pols won’t make that mistake again – they want in.

        * Fun fact: Boston is the only city where all four major sports franchises play in privately owned stadia:

        Bruins & Celtics at TD Garden
        Red Sox at Fenway
        Patriots at Gillette

      • Chafed

        All the local pols went to the Big Dig School of Finance. They want a piece of any future infrastructure.

      • slumbrew

        Precisely. TBF, those were some sweet, sweet federal funds, with almost no oversight – the Krafts might actually want some return on their investment.

        The nerve!

      • Chafed

        Absolutely. I suspect all the Boston owners figured out they would take a bath if the locals had a role in constructing their stadiums.

      • slumbrew

        For the most part, the stadia pre-date or post-date the thought of public bonds to build them.

        The Krafts re-did Foxborough on their own dime (largely), since people had figured out that the concessions were such a huge cash-cow.

        The re-build of the Garden followed the Kraft’s lead – no need for public funds, since you can keep all that sweet, sweet concession money yourself otherwise.

        No idea why places like Minnesota are cool with floating public bonds for stadia – that’s pure public cost, private profit.

        But *muh Vikings!*, I guess.

      • rhywun

        In NYC you can’t build anything without enthusiastic support from the functionaries who run their fiefdoms that we call “community districts” – unelected positions that are filled with NIMBY assholes.

        NYC FC have at any given time three or four proposals going and all of them get shot down. The last one was the spot where the Islanders built their new stadium.

      • rhywun

        or, “arena”

      • slumbrew

        So, pretty much what the Krafts are facing

        ISTG, Gillette Stadium only got built because it’s 45 minutes away from Boston; a new stadium on the T will never happen because too many pols have their hand out.

      • rhywun

        I’d be happy if NYC FC could figure out a way to play at the Meadowlands but I guess ownership issues prevent it.

        It’d be a fuckton better than fucking Yankee Stadium.

    • Chafed

      If they had to play in East Hartford then someone was being punished.

  11. MikeS

    Digging this story. A lot.

  12. rhywun

    Today in “new normal”.

    I have three Amazon packages out there in limbo that are “running late”. One already over a day and two that were supposed to arrive tonight.

    Last month I had two packages that never arrived at all (well, one of them “arrived” to the wrong state).

    I wonder if I will receive any of these three.

    • rhywun

      PS. I saw something that brightened my day.

      There is rampant package theft in the lobby of my apartment building. I frequently see notes posted on the wall asking the criminal to kindly return this package or that. The latest one read (paraphrasing) “To the thief who stole my son’s birthday present, I hope YOU BURN IN HELL!!!”

      I do wonder if the lobby cameras are working and if any of the thieves are actually caught. I sure hope so because they are the lowest scum.

      • MikeS

        That is some lowdown shit.

      • rhywun

        I passed on an apartment once with a doorman/concierge because I was like “this is an old-people building” but I’m beginning to see the appeal. I should add “doorman” to my list of requirements for my next place – it’s already a long list with things like “no small children within earshot” and “no rent control”.

      • MikeS

        Or you could move somewhere that you don’t need a doorman to protect your deliveries.

        Just sayin’…easier said than done (or desired)

      • rhywun

        I’m a city boy. This dog ain’t learning any new tricks.

        But actually my next place will probably be under six units which is the cutoff for rent control. My last place was a “flat” (three units, very common in this neighborhood). My next place will be something like that. Big building has some advantages and many disadvantages, as I’ve found out over the last nine years.

      • MikeS

        I get that. I see the appeal. I actually wonder if I’m not a city boy in country boy’s clothing. I’ve had a few business trips to Chicago and loved it. Alas, my life is settled and a move to the city isn’t in the cards. Oh well. We all play the hand we’re dealt.

    • CPRM

      The new site I’ve been using to buy my Transformers grup toys from has shit tracking. It says ‘arrived in destination country’ and that’s pretty much the only update I get until it shows up. Not even where in the country it arrived. But, so far I’ve gotten them. Delivery company (not sure which since that info isn’t provided) left the last one on the hood of my car, I guess they were scared of the ice on my sidewalk after the freezing rain the day before.

      • rhywun

        left the last one on the hood of my car

        lol

    • Don escaped Texas

      I can’t get any loads out. LTL can’t even pick up a simple pallet. The excuses change every day.

      A lot of things have fallen apart during virus theater, but what got even worse in the past month?

      • Sean

        Finding employees.

  13. Ownbestenemy

    Db we gotta should get together and work on a format. Also great installment again juris!

  14. pistoffnick the refusnik

    Thank you, juris.

    *waiting for the next episode*
    Same bat-time, same bat-place

    • rhywun

      Adam West will always be my The Batman.

      • MikeS

        Adam West is the fun Batman. Michael Keaton will always be The Batman.

      • rhywun

        It’s the only Batman movie I’ve seen so sure, I’ll go along with that. The other seventy-nine Batmans can piss off.

      • CPRM

        And not one of them has been accurate to the source material. You’d think they’d try it at least once.

      • rhywun

        Yeah… I’m not the target audience for a source-accurate Batman, to be honest.

        There is reason why I haven’t watched any of those impostors.

      • Sean

        DC sucks.

      • rhywun

        Uh… I had no idea he died. Sorry, Adam.

      • CPRM

        Sorry to break the news to you 5 years late.

      • The Bearded Hobbit

        Adam West was one of the few celebrities who didn’t mind poking fun at themselves. It was easy to tell that he was having fun while filming

        Another that comes to mind is Steve Tyler. I lumped the group into “basic rock” and didn’t pay much attention to them. Then Tyler started showing up in these skits where he was taking jabs at himself and, again, having fun. I’ve appreciated him a lot more over the years for his off-stage persona.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I didn’t know it was his daughter when it came out!

      • Chafed

        I don’t know if you saw Aerosmith on SNL years ago. They all appeared in a Wayne’s World skit. It was very funny. The entire band looked like they were having fun.

    • The Bearded Hobbit

      Same bat-time, same bat-*channel*

  15. Tundra

    Crazy good.

    Thanks, brother.

    • straffinrun

      ?

  16. juris imprudent

    Well I can tell you all, I’m about as unsure of what is going on as you are. Is Fuller setting him up, or recruiting him? Is Frank a good guy or a true Fed? What does there are none that are not accountable for what they do really mean? I’m glad you’re enjoying this as much as I am.

  17. dbleagle

    JI you are doing great. I am enjoying this series.

  18. ron73440

    I like it, you really have an interesting tale going.

  19. mikey

    Great stuff JI. Even more fun knowing the author doesn’t even know yet where it’ going.

  20. creech

    Better than most recent James Patterson “co-authored” stuff. Good story line and reader isn’t at all sure where it is heading. Unlike Patterson, and his ilk, you haven’t padded the story with extraneous crap about what the characters are wearing, drinking, smoking, packing, or screwing. And, so far, no basement dwelling hacker genius, misunderstood and damaged goods female figure, or ex-SEAL who can take on and defeat twelve heavily armed assassins while bound and chained to a chair in an empty warehouse.
    .

  21. rhywun

    extraneous crap about what the characters are wearing, drinking, smoking, packing, or screwing

    There is a time and a place for that. I love a doorstopper sometimes but other times sure, it’s not needed.

  22. Tulip

    Reminder: send me your “what we are reading” contributions through a message in the forum and I will compile. I need responses by Saturday the 12th. Thanks

    • rhywun

      “Leviathan Wakes”. About 30 pages in.

      At my current pace I might finish the nine books in 2031.

      • slumbrew

        It is well worth your time.

      • Chafed

        How’s Babylon 5 coming along?

      • rhywun

        Quiet, you.

      • Chafed

        Rhy I am starting to worry about you. My youngest and I have been watching sporadically and we’re in the middle of season 4. It’s sooooooo good. Get back on your horse and enjoy the ride.

      • rhywun

        I want to but I find it very difficult to direct all my focus on the TV. Everything else I watch is stuff that makes great background noise.

      • Not Adahn

        The Expanse > B5.

      • slumbrew

        *dons flame-retardant suit*

        (I’ve not watched B5 but I know Glibs will Have Thoughts about that statement)

      • Not Adahn

        Oh, I replaced my taped-off-of-TNT entire run of B5 with DVDs back when they were first available.

        But The Expanse is the best scifi show of all time.

        Not saying it’s my favorite mind you, but I have a mental disorder that forces me to enjoy absolute garbage wrapped up in sci-fi wrappers *koff koff EarthFinalConflict koff*

      • Tulip

        *sigh* Glibs. *shakes head*

    • UnCivilServant

      Is the series returning?

    • Chafed

      So that’s how you get me to root for Iran.

    • straffinrun

      Vaguely identified sources. Ugh.

    • slumbrew

      They’re trying to thread the needle – keep the name people know them as, drop the problematic Russian name.

      In a sane world, it’d be a non-issue.

      We’ll see.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I just don’t see how people wouldn’t see Stoli as its Russian name still. Or it’s Russian association. But then I’m not a branding expert.

      • Chafed

        Agreed.

    • grrizzly

      Too bad I don’t drink vodka. Otherwise I’d buy boxes of Russian–or not–vodka at deep discounts.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Already pulled here. Now the idiot state and their franchisees are storing them indefinitely.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Went to check on which stores have inventory in hopes of finding some ignoramus, but the one thing they sort of do well is broken. And they’re now using Tableau, which I’m pretty sure is the shittiest visualization software hence its popularity with government agencies. “Oh look, I have meaningless metrics in pretty colors in a layout that ignore normal browser controls. I’m a data scientist!”

      • Ownbestenemy

        Ugh…everything is Tableau… but beats the daily ‘forms’ I have to fill out built in Excel. FedGov…hey at least we aren’t using floppy….shit, we aren’t still on WinME….no…..uh….russia!

      • grrizzly

        I still saw real Russian vodka, as in made in Russia, in a few liquor stores in California in the last week. It was Russian Standard in San Diego and Beluga in LA. Of course, everyone still had Stoli.

      • Not Adahn

        I remember really enjoying Crystal/Gold Ring back in the late ’80s and ’90s. No idea if that was Russian or Latvian.

  23. Chafed

    I saw $6/gallon gas on my drive home tonight. Joe Biden is going to be a Jimmy Carter Redux.

    • slumbrew

      We’ve got ~ 3 long years before he’s Carter part 2.

      • Chafed

        Between us dog owners, it’s going to feel like 21 years.

      • slumbrew

        It feels like dog-years for all of us right now.

        I’ll expand on a note to Tulip, but I just started The Forgotten Man.

        The introduction alone has me wanting to shout out loud, due to so many parallels.

        Yet Washington was doing all the wrong things. Officials in the capital seemed arrogant, obsessed with numbers, and oblivious to the pain the nation was suffering.

      • Chafed

        I need to put that on my reading list.

    • straffinrun

      But an electric powered nuclear reactor and you, too, can proudly stick it to Putin.

      • Chafed

        Will it power my rail gun?

  24. straffinrun

    What’s driving me nuts is how so many people think that, by escalating tension and engaging more directly in military action, they are being “anti war.” So, I’m supporting Putin’s war by not wanting a bigger war? Saddam, Muammar, Assad = bad guys. So what? The response by the US was worse. No reason to believe further US involvement in “current year war” on the other side of the globe is gonna help one iota.

    • Ownbestenemy

      We spent 2 years with slavery is freedom, down is up, chick’s with dicks are women, men need tampons, men pregnancy emotions, etc etc….

      Saying you want all but boots on the ground is anti-war now. Supply warships, bullets, supplies and tweets from your back porch and you too will be holding the red menace at bay.

    • Gustave Lytton

      I was wondering today where the no blood for oil crowd was.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Next to Cindy Sheehan wondering why they are of no use

    • Chafed

      Is supplying Ukraine with arms, but not troops, escalating tension? Serious question.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I would say yes. It’s an open proxy war at this point.

      • Sean

        ⬆?

      • straffinrun

        I’d say so if it’s the US govt doing it.

      • Chafed

        Thanks. We have a difference of opinion. The way I see it, Russia is the aggressor. They violated the NAP. They may complain about others, including us, arming Ukraine but they brought it on themselves.

      • straffinrun

        For me it’s not even a question of who’s the agressor. It’s a question of: will US involvement help given how people across the political spectrum ( including Biden himself) warned us not to expand NATO. They did it anyways and when you treat someone like an enemy, don’t be surprised when they turn into one. The US has zero credibility in diplomacy with Russia on this point now.

      • Chafed

        That’s side stepping the issue to my mind. Ukraine didn’t do a thing to Russia. Russia invaded them. Russia is deliberately shelling civilians. I see no reason not to arm Ukraine so they can defend themselves.

      • straffinrun

        The regime in Ukraine had been attacking ethic Russians in Eastern Ukraine for the past ten years. Estimates say 10k~15k dead civilians.

        Yes, that was an internal conflict, so Putin really escalated by making in an inter state conflict. As far as the NAP goes, however, that distinction is irrelevant.

      • Gustave Lytton

        R2P!

        Putin better cut a check to Samantha Power.

      • grrizzly

        The Ukrainian rulers should have stayed away from the US domestic politics. They didn’t.

        Ukraine then made a bad situation even worse. When the same people who had left them prey to Putin asked them to take sides in an American domestic political conflict, the Ukrainians enthusiastically signed on—instead of running hard in the opposite direction.

        In 2016, the Hillary Clinton campaign came calling on Ukrainian officials and activists to lend some Slavic authenticity to its Russia collusion narrative targeting Donald Trump. Indeed, Russiagate’s central storyline was about Ukraine. Yes, Trump had supposedly been compromised by a sex tape filmed in Moscow, but Putin’s ostensible reason for helping Trump win the presidency was to get him to drop Ukraine-related sanctions. Here was another chance for Ukraine to stick it to Putin, and gain favor with what it imagined would be the winning party in the American election.

        With the CIA’s Brennan and a host of senior FBI and DOJ officials pushing Russiagate into the press—and running an illegal espionage campaign against the Trump team—Ukrainian political figures gladly joined in. Key participants included Kyiv’s ambassador to Washington, who wrote a Trump-Russia piece for the U.S. press, and a member of the Ukrainian parliament who allegedly contributed to the dossier. The collusion narrative was also augmented by Ukrainian American operatives, like Alexandra Chalupa, who was tied into the Democratic Party’s NGO complex. The idea that this game might have consequences for Ukraine’s relations with its more powerful neighbor doesn’t seem to have entered the heads of either the feckless Ukrainians or the American political operatives who cynically used them.

      • Lackadaisical

        ” I see no reason not to arm Ukraine so they can defend themselves.”

        Compare and contrast to Korean and Vietnam wars (hell, Afghanistan, Soviet edition). The super powers did everything they could to fuck with each other, short of actually shooting at each other (some ‘volunteers’ aside). That did not (and shouldn’t) escalate to full on nuclear death.

        I am sympathetic to claims that Russia has a legit security claim, and that the breakaway provinces should have a proper referendum- but that should have been solved through diplomacy. Unfortunately, Trump didn’t get reelected. I have a strong suspicion this would not be happening now as Putin was less afraid Trump would stick our collective dicks into Ukraine.

        “The regime in Ukraine had been attacking ethic Russians in Eastern Ukraine for the past ten years. Estimates say 10k~15k dead civilians.”

        Isn’t this a little overblown? They’re attacking rebels, collateral damage happens. Absent some obvious malice I’m not going to accept implications they’re ethnically cleansing without a bit more evidence- 2k people a year during hostilities doesn’t a genocide make.

      • Lackadaisical

        @Straff:

        Are you getting the 30k from your report (dated in 2016):

        “In total, from the beginning of the conflict in mid-April 2014 to 15 February 2016, OHCHR recorded 30,211 casualties in eastern Ukraine, among civilians, Ukrainian armed forces, and members of armed groups – including 9,167 people killed and 21,044 injured.3”

        That number is lumping all casualties together. Obviously the report is now 6 years old, so I wouldn’t be surprised if they had gotten up to 30k, but the rate at the time of the report was averaging <100 civilian casualties a month for the past year.

      • Chafed

        I don’t see how this is a naval war. But let’s say it is. Does The Hague Convention say anything about shelling civilians? I’m going to guess Putin & Co. aren’t playing by any rules but his own.

      • Gustave Lytton

        It’s not a naval war, but it still defines what is a belligerent and what is a neutral party. If we wish to remain a neutral party, we cannot supply arms to a party, at least as far as from the government. We do so and we become a belligerent, and yes, a valid target. There was a reason we supplied arms on the QT through private parties and cutouts to the mujahadeen.

        Russia’s violations are irrelevant, and even if he is Hitler do not allow us to supply arms and remain neutral. We can either remain neutral or we can be a belligerent. Those are the choices. Are we ready to go to war?

      • straffinrun

        War with a nuclear power that we foolishly alienated after the Cold War?

  25. Ownbestenemy

    Heard today ‘Putins price increase….’

    I don’t even know where to start with that.

    • slumbrew

      OFFS

    • straffinrun

      An honest press would check to see if Russia is actually selling less oil/gas to other countries now. Honestly, I dunno but I’d guess there are plenty of buyers out there.

      • Chafed

        That would require work.

      • Lackadaisical

        Even were it less, that’d just be evidence that buyers were having issues obtaining it due to sanctions, not that Russia wasn’t trying to sell.

    • Chafed

      There is a kernel of truth in that an oil producing state at war will increase gas prices. Of course, you have to ignore the year long run up in prices and Biden doing what he can to limit US production.

  26. Mojeaux

    My children are communing over employeehood at Walmart. I’m skeert.

  27. MikeS

    Look into the future
    Look into my eyes
    And tell me everything’s alright.

    Tell me where we’re going
    I’m so afraid, cuz I don’t know what’s going on
    With my life

    But, it’ll be alright, tonight.

    • slumbrew

      Not normally my thing, but that video led me to this song, which I’ve always liked.

      That kicks ass.

      • Chafed

        Your lack of appreciation for Ozzy is disturbing. But yes, Judith is a kick ass song.

      • MikeS

        I fucking hate that song. Victim blaming wrapped in an atheism anthem. And his mom is the target, no less.

        Maynard James Keenan is a pile of human shit. And not even much of a songwriter.

    • Chafed

      I can’t believe you are hitting on me after ignoring my Steel Panther link.

      • MikeS

        I can’t believe you think Judith is a god song.

      • MikeS

        Topical typo: Meant “good” not “god”

      • Chafed

        I understand your antipathy for the lyrics. I feel same the same way about much of Rage Against The Machine’s work. It’s still great. I know that’s irrational. It’s just how I feel. ?‍♂️

      • MikeS

        It’s one thing to look past politics. It’s another to ignore that fucker blaming his mother and her God for her death. Fuck him.

      • Lackadaisical

        Meh, still a great song.

        I don’t think it is wrong to have those feelings and even to express them.

        I never took it as blaming God or his mother for her illness so much as saying, how can you believe in God? If He exists, He could have prevented this. That is not an unreasonable query- the goodness of God and the existence of suffering is a true religious quandary.

      • straffinrun

        Rage has some killer riffs. ?‍♂️

  28. UnCivilServant

    Did they ever actually find anything on Oak Island other than Reality TV shows?

    • Gender Traitor

      They’re still digging, and they do seem to keep finding evidence that something significant happened there. I’d tell you the latest, but as last night’s episode started and the usual suspects drove up to what’s currently the most promising dig site (the “money pit,”) I dozed off on the sofa and don’t remember another thing about it.

    • The Hyperbole

      Sam Spade said “When your slapped, you’ll take it and like it.”

    • straffinrun

      These military pledges to come to the aid of a country under attack are bullshit. They pledge that future leaders are bound to join a fight they may not wish to join otherwise. Who has more knowledge, the people who made these promises or the ones who lead now?

  29. Plinker762

    Random music link; The Needle Lies I alway mishear “needle” as “leader” Both work for current events.

  30. UnCivilServant

    Morning.

    I don’t want to go to work today 🙁

    • Sean

      So don’t. Call out with Covid toe.

      • UnCivilServant

        That would make me feel lazy. Even though I’m feeling burned out.

      • Sean

        I haven’t called out sick since the early aughts. Even then, it was super rare.

      • UnCivilServant

        I called out just two weeks ago when my ear infection was making it difficult to think. That’s another reason I’m hesitant to do it, since it hasn’t been that long.

      • Lackadaisical

        Meh, it is a government job, they won’t really care.

      • UnCivilServant

        I have my own personal standards.

        Anyway, I have to get on the road.

    • TARDis

      “Barbie cancelled for being in the ‘Nutcracker’.”

    • TARDis

      WTF is wrong with people?

    • TARDis

      They both look expensive.

    • Not Adahn

      My upper has been in NJ for the last four days 🙁

  31. Lackadaisical

    Should be closing on the new home today. Wish me luck.

    • Sean

      Good luck.

      • Lackadaisical

        Thanks.

        Now begins the grind of fixing and replacing everything… I swore I wouldn’t do this to myself again. *sigh*

    • TARDis

      Good luck.

  32. TARDis

    Was one of the dudes named Cornpop? LOL

  33. slumbrew

    A little alone time is nice when the wife is away.

    Downside: the dog still expects her morning walk at the time my wife normally takes her out.

    Which would be now.

    ‘Morning, early-rising Glibs.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, slummy, TARDy, Sean, and Lack!

      This morning, the little black cat didn’t insist on being picked up and cuddled while the coffee maker finished up. I hope he’s feeling OK. ?

      • UnCivilServant

        Morning.

        Not sure what to think about the cat. Maybe he’s just being moody?

      • Gender Traitor

        He’ll probably come over and insist on getting on my lap just when it’s time for me to go clean up and dress for work.

  34. TARDis

    This morning I am pondering the appropriate punishment (read coaching) that should be applied to comedian-wannabee propagators of ‘reply-to-all’ emails. What should it be? I say a bunch of broken pinkies would be instructional.

    • Gender Traitor

      Some of our managers have resorted to including “PLEASE DO NOT ‘REPLY ALL'” in emails with announcements of good news like promotions, etc.

    • Lackadaisical

      If it was funny, a promotion. If unfunny, summary execution.

    • UnCivilServant

      We have distribution lists which have a limited set of people allowed to send emails to them. So anyone tryin to reply all will only get their message through to those who are explicitly listed as recipients and bounce off the DL.

      We have other DLs without this protection, and the occassional reply storm does flare up on those.

    • slumbrew

      Our semi-standard move is to send to just a limited list and put the ‘all’ address (dl-all@ or whatever) as a BCC.

      That greatly limits the damage.

      • TARDis

        One think our IT would implement such a policy.

      • slumbrew

        It’s not automatic – it relies on the sender doing the right thing.

        That said, once you get a few e-mails with ‘(dl-all BCC’d)’ as the first line, you tend to get in the habit yourself.

  35. Gender Traitor

    Local weather radar claims it’s just started snowing in my area. Luckily, the AccuWindow contradicts that…so far.

    • UnCivilServant

      What’s the view out the window say?

      • Gender Traitor

        See reference to “AccuWindow” above. ?

        I know – it’s awfully early yet. Have another swig of Dew.

      • UnCivilServant

        I just figured it was another widget on the bloated and ad-clogged accuweather site.

    • Gender Traitor

      ***SIGH!!!*** Now the traffic report says there’s a severe slowdown on the stretch of the interstate just before my usual exit. Guess I’d better get ready to leave early. ?

      • TARDis

        There is usually no traffic when I come in. There is the occasional wreck caused by late night shenanigans.

      • UnCivilServant

        The whole reason I went for a 7-3 work schedule was to avoid the godawful rush hour traffic around here. Even then, I’m still catching the opening stages of it.

      • TARDis

        I’d be a mass murderer if I had to stay until 3PM. Even 20 minutes past 2:30 means an additional 20-45 minutes added to my commute.

      • UnCivilServant

        The time exponent starts a bit later here. At 3, I can make similar time to nominal traffic. At 3:30, I will be delayed noticabilty, and it gets worse the later the departure time until quite late.

      • TARDis

        When I was an OT whore, I always stayed until after 6PM. I have not worked late since the before times though.

  36. UnCivilServant

    I find the very idea of a camel beauty pagent hilarious every time there’s an article about one. I just don’t see any beauty in the beasts.

    • Ghostpatzer

      Their beauty is in the toes.

      • TARDis

        Are there moose beauty pageants?

      • Ghostpatzer

        I’ll defer to Tres on that one.

      • Festus

        Bingo Hall lothario, confirmed!

      • Tres Cool

        A Møøse once bit my sister… No realli!

  37. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody

    • TARDis

      No nuke launches so far. That’s good, isn’t it?

    • Festus

      Beer is goody. Steady work is goody. The love of a good woman is extra goody. Tee times are goody. The bite-on is goody. The laughter of children is goody. My first smoke in the morning is not goody but the last one always is. Pets are goody. My Glibs are goody.

      • Tres Cool

        I havent had a cig in nearly 8 years, and I still miss the 1st one of the morning.

    • Sean

      Steak.

  38. Ghostpatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates. Where is the snow?

    Really digging Frank’s adventures with the insurrectionists(?) Also, good to see that Suthen has returned.

    • Festus

      I really need to go back and re-read it from the start. I’m half-in-the-bag when I get around to them.

  39. Festus

    Things that happened yesterday – The Good? Lolbot and Suthen made their long awaited return! The Bad? The price of gas just jumped another 17 cents per liter overnight. The Meh? My lay-off has been delayed for another month. The Ugly? A conference call with the big-wigs wherein my Asian boss who sounds like George Takei expounding upon death panels and abortion will hold forth and will calmly explain how everything that is happening right now is for the greater good. I will not be updating my health news until I learn what the fuck is going on.

    • Festus

      You guys know that it’s always Lupus.

      • UnCivilServant

        Feeling Wolfish? It might be Canis Lupus

    • Ghostpatzer

      17 cents per liter? That’s 65 cents a gallon, oh myyyy. Here it “only” went up 20 cents.

      • Festus

        Sorry, it was 20 cents per liter. We’re at nearly 2 bucks per liter or almost 8 bucks a gallon. They hate you and they want you dead.

    • rhywun

      *looks*

      It went up 30 cents overnight here.

      Wow.

      • Sean

        Do you have a car? I’ve don’t think I’ve seen you mention driving, ever.

      • Festus

        Knock on effects. Someone has to drive into Brooklyn to deliver his Sushi. (Pace, Rhywun, I know that you are the good sort of cool…)

      • rhywun

        The long list of items on my Amazon page that are “running late” has me worried.

        The knock-on effects are already here.

      • rhywun

        No. But we all get fucked eventually.

      • TARDis

        Sometimes it’s good to be below average.

      • slumbrew

        I mentioned yesterday – you can add ‘Los Angeles’ to the chart and feel better about yourself (unless you’re one of the benighted CA Glibs – sorry, my dudes and dudette(s)).

      • Sean

        Fraudulent elections have consequences.

      • rhywun

        More insanity:

        On Monday, [the] Environmental Protection Agency announced it wants to slap new rules on tractor-trailers, buses, delivery vans and moving trucks.

        They’re just gonna blow their wad until the next election, it seems.

      • Sean

        *Anger rising*

      • Not Adahn

        I ain’t gonna lie: Urban life is absolutely awesome in short stretches when money isn’t a serious constraint.

        Getting an AirBnB in the old city parts of Montreal, Quebec or Ottawa have been wonderful vacations.

  40. Fourscore

    Morning to all,

    Finally, finally, it looks like Spring will spring on Sunday, 4 more days of winter and the snow will start to go. I want to walk in the mud again.

    I have been up for quite a while, had to catch up on the ongoing rock feuds between MikeS and all the others that happened overnight. Fortunately I don’t (won’t) listen to what is loosely thrown around as music. The advantages of being old.

    Now to watch the pols make fools of themselves while jeopardizing the future of our youths.

    • Ghostpatzer

      Mornin’, 4×20.

      Now to watch the pols make fools of themselves while jeopardizing the future of our youths.

      It’s tough to laugh at those fools considering that my kids will have to deal with the fallout of their idiocy. But I will point fingers and laugh anyway, the alternative being impotent rage.

    • Festus

      One nice thing about losing the job might be it lighting a fire under my arse to actually get things done around the place if I can manage. I’ll have a year of “free” money.

  41. rhywun

    Notes from the IFLS Underground.

    If we can’t support our friends and neighbors who want to take off their masks when such actions are strongly supported by science, how are we going to get them to put their masks back on should the situation call for it in the future?

    Removing your mask (where appropriate) and explaining why you are doing so to your friends and neighbors (in a polite and nonjudgmental way), is just as important as explaining the value and urgency of getting vaccinated.

    etc. etc.

    Oh, piss off.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      They continue to pretend or maybe even believe that they are the rational ones.

      • TARDis

        Crazy people don’t know they are insane.

      • Fourscore

        Somehow, the same people that can’t teach kids to read and write are experts on health advice. Yet, there are some believers.

  42. robodruid

    Morning All:
    Glad to see that we are all here. That’s a hopeful sign.
    While i know patriot batteries in Poland are supposed to be defensive, i think its still escallating.

    Anybody doing any panic shopping?

    • Ghostpatzer

      Yup. Placing orders for the essentials today – coffee and tobacco. Also will stock the freezer with beef and chicken.

      • robodruid

        Coffee and tabacco are good ideas.
        Not sure about frozen stuff.

        I may need to get tobacco seeds….

      • Festus

        Where to buy?

    • slumbrew

      Limited space for perishables, sadly.

      I guess I’ll get another carton of toilet paper.

      • Festus

        Trade goods.

      • slumbrew

        Ay-yup.

        FWIW, Amazon is claiming delivery tomorrow for toilet paper and paper towels.

    • Sean

      I bought moar ammo. Apparently, I’m assembling another AR. I’m also looking to increase my alcohol reserves.

      So, nope. No panic buying here.

      • Tulip

        I’m still well stocked. Just replacing as I use stuff.

    • Fourscore

      We normally are a little ahead of the curve. I’m putting the missus on a plane Friday, I’ll check Walmart and lay in some additional supplies if they are available.

      A friend and neighbor came by yesterday with a nice package. They had butchered a beef, we ended up with liver, soup bones, a nice steak and a couple packs of hamburger. He left with 3 packs of venison sticks that I have made at the local store. I have nice neighbors, no one bothers one another.

    • slumbrew

      Looking forward to Sleepy Joe attempting to pronounce that.

      • rhywun

        “the thing”

      • slumbrew

        “c’mon, man – you kno… you know, the thing!”

      • Festus

        Syphillis Feet! Come on, Man! The thing!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Hillary would have been more appropriate, or maybe Klaus Schwab

    • Not Adahn

      If it has ten arms it isn’t an OCTOpus.

      • slumbrew

        Decapus?

      • R C Dean

        Squid.

      • Festus

        So long as it identifies as an 8 leg, all is good.