Thursday Afternoon Links

by | Mar 31, 2022 | Daily Links | 243 comments

La tua musica.

SIR, DOES THIS MEAN THAT ANN-MARGRET ISN’T COMING? The watermelons promised threatened us a bright, new future where all cars are electric and are powered by batteries. Well, it turns out they didn’t think that through very well. China is the world’s top producer of Lithium. The US has some lithium deposits, but it turns out those are all on land which is either claimed to be sacred to Native Americans, or is the home of super-important “fragile ecosystems and wildlife.”

DON’T DARE CALL IT A SHITHOLE: Since 1990, at least 82 people have been murdered over alleged blasphemy in Pakistan, according to an Al Jazeera tally. Five of those killings took place last year alone, including mobs stoning and burning victims to death. And the evidentiary standards are pretty low, apparently all someone has to do is have a dream that someone committed blasphemy, and that’s justification for slitting the throat of the alleged blasphemer.

PA JUDGE REMOVES SCHOOL BOARD MEMBERS FROM OFFICE OVER MASK MANDATE: The order is a result of a parent-filed petition to the West Chester Area School District back in February, according to public media organization WHYY. One of the parents, Beth Ann Rosica, argued that under the Pennsylvania school code districts have no authority to require students to wear masks. Other ways to remove school board members, without recourse to the woodchipper.

WHEN HELL FROZE OVER: The ACLU opposed a California  bill requiring parents to tell school officials if they keep guns at home. The bill failed its first committee vote. Bill sponsor Sen. Anthony Portantino and supporters said it could help prevent mass shootings. Yeah, right. But expect to see this nonsense crop up again, and spread to other states.

A SLAP ON THE WRIST: FEC fines Hillary and Dems for “misreporting” Steele dossier. At least it’s something.

 

NASA CHANGES UP, DELAYS MARS SAMPLE RETURN MISSION: Mars Rover Perseverance, currently on Mars, collects mineral samples, seals them up in numbered tubes, and drops those tubes on the Martian surface for later retrieval by another robot which will collect them, then load them into a rocket which will return the samples to earth. Originally the sample-retrieving robot and sample-return rocket were going to land together as one unit; now they will land separately and sample return will be delayed until 2033.

About The Author

Tonio

Tonio

Tonio is a Glibs shitposter, linkstar (Thursday PM, yo), author, and editor. He is also a GlibZoom personality and prankster. Tonio is a big fan of pic-a-nic baskets. His hobbies include salmon fishing, territorial displays, dumpster diving, and posing for wildlife photographers.

243 Comments

  1. Surly Knott

    NASA late on a project?
    Well, at least they’ll come in under budget.

    • Tonio

      They would have had to design a whole new entry, descent, and landing (EDL) system had they gone with a single lander. This new, two-lander plan lets them re-use the EDL system they designed for Curiosity and Perseverance.

      • Lackadaisical

        Seems it would have been better to keep all the samples with perseverance and just pick that up?

      • Plisade

        My thoughts, too. IANARocketScientist, but the empty tubes were stored on the lander, so I’d guess there’d already be a home for them once filled.

      • Tonio

        Transporting the entire rover would require a much bigger return rocket. Perseverance is pretty big and heavy what with its radioisotope thermal generator and all.

        This strategy maximizes recovery potential. If Perseverance becomes stuck, or falls off a cliff, or whatever, you lose all the samples. If the sample caddy becomes jammed so the other robot can’t extract it, you lose all the samples. Shitting them out in sealed tubes gives you more oppos and flexibility for recovery.

      • pistoffnick the refusnik

        *searches for NERD! sign*

  2. KSuellington

    Also a big western fan, The Good , the Bad and the Ugly is my ringtone. Best 99 cents I’ve ever spent.

    • R.J.

      More Westerns. Check.

      • KSuellington

        Check out El Topo RJ if you want to see a Western drenched in LSD.

    • Sensei

      + 1 Yojimbo / A Fistfull of Dollars

  3. Tres Cool

    whaddup doh’

    • Rebel Scum

      What’s up? I’ll tell ya what’s up. Gas prices…

  4. pistoffnick the refusnik

    DOES THIS MEAN THAT ANN-MARGRET ISN’T COMING?

    No, she’s just breathing heavily.

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      But what watermelons!

  5. Tundra

    Mmmmm. Ann Margaret.

    Thanks, Tonio, because the lynx make me pray for nukes.

  6. Fourscore

    Thanks Tonio, a redhead my age. Your efforts will be rewarded one day.

    The question of guns at home would never be asked in MN, the answer is pretty well known

    • Tres Cool

      What is it with you people and redheads? Im trying to quit.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Because Red heads are Hawt?

      • Tres Cool

        So is meth, but it’s also toxic.

        I need to make a meme: “Heroin- the redhead of drugs”

      • MikeS

        I’d say redheads are more like meth-laced-crack.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        “Blondes from Hell.”

        I dated a coupla reds back in the day. Memorable.

  7. Tres Cool

    ” …but it turns out those are all on land which is either claimed to be sacred to Native Americans, or is the home of super-important “fragile ecosystems and wildlife.”

    Fun fact- a client of mine makes talcum powder that they source either from Jamaica or China. Seems its cheaper $/ton to buy chinese talc, across the Pacific, through Panama, to New Orleans, then put on a barge and sent up-river to Evansville, IN than to buy it from our Talc mines in Wyoming.

    Funner fact- only about 15% of the talc they make is for cosmetics (talcum powders). The rest is uses industrially, primarily polymers and plastics.

    • Tonio

      I’m sure the Chinese are aware of this and are pricing their talc to undercut domestic production. They also effectively have no environmental regulations which makes this easier for them.

      Apparently there is some asbestos in talc and the body powder industry has mostly switched to cornstarch.

      • Rat on a train

        But asbestos is all-natural, organic, non-GMO, gluten free, …

      • Bobarian LMD

        Akshuwally, asbestos, being a silicate, would not be organic.

      • Rat on a train

        False advertising at the grocery store.

    • rhywun

      Something tells me China isn’t paying much attention to sacred lands and fragile ecosystems.

      • Tres Cool

        I try to explain that to people that think we’re the largest polluter on the planet. China & India are taking up the slack.

      • Tonio

        The Chinese government controls info. You rarely see pictures of pollution there.

      • rhywun

        I’ve been to China. The pollution was unbelievable.

    • Shpip

      There has been some discussion about making Wyoming’s mines competitive with China, but as we all know, talc is cheap.

      • Rat on a train

        They tried to compete in strip mining, but ended up losing all their clothes.

      • Plisade

        Maybe the poles could do it cheaper.

    • Plinker762

      If only we had some resources which could be used as energy storage. Like some kind of liquid or gas.

  8. rhywun

    Since 1990, at least 82 people have been murdered over alleged blasphemy in Pakistan

    Pfft. 82 times what? It’s gotta be way more than that.

    • R.J.

      Yeah. In Chicago they call the Friday.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Get that tooth fixed for God’s sake.

      • rhywun

        Yeah, that made me wince.

        A TW would have been nice.

      • TARDis

        He should cishet-up and impregnate Stacey, the ruler of Earth.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Their offspring would break open the final seal.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        #9?

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Hell yeah we’re coming for your guns, and your children!

    • Rat on a train

      Latinx you bigot!

      • Fourscore

        Apparently it’s OK to mess with kids, as long as they are not trans.

        He needs to become an artist, there where the money is these days

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Ironically, he does want to mess with transkids by subjecting them to irreversible surgeries.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Why would you want this guy running anything, let alone a large state.

  9. Scruffy Nerfherder

    apparently all someone has to do is have a dream that someone committed blasphemy

    Someone explain to me how are they different from the woke crowd?

    • Bobarian LMD

      Their women are better behaved?

  10. Rebel Scum

    The what?

    In a video released on social media Thursday, President Biden released a message of support on Transgender Day of Visibility.

    The world cannot possibly take us seriously anymore.

    • Bobarian LMD
      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Classic

  11. pistoffnick the refusnik

    …at least 82 people have been murdered over alleged blasphemy…

    Look, I had a lovely supper and all I said to my wife was, “That piece of halibut was good enough for Jehovah.”

    https://youtu.be/bDe9msExUK8?t=98

  12. trshmnstr the terrible

    *dials 9 digit number on Teams*
    *”connecting…” , never gets to the ring tone, crashes*
    *dials +1 number on Teams*
    *”connecting…”, 40 seconds later it finally begins ring tone*

    Who designs this crap?

    • Nephilium

      Microsoft?

      Committees?

      Telecom people?

    • Rat on a train

      Try working for a Linux shop that gets bought by a Windows shop.

  13. JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

    “DON’T DARE CALL IT A SHITHOLE”

    Well sure, but lynching wasn’t a federal crime until yesterday and you’ll be thrown in jail for saying “gay” in FL, so who’s the shithole country?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I dreamt that shit swastikas were smeared on my office door!

      /conversation starter

      • Rat on a train

        Needs moar DEI training.

      • R.J.

        Clearly it was weaponized incontinence.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Sir, there is no business allowed on the grounds of the Incontinental.

  14. Warty

    Don’t worry, it will all be over soon

    No ruling class has ever hated its own country and people in the least, much less to the fanatic degree of our ruling class. No elite has, in Anton’s words, ever been “determined to make [their country’s] population fat, weak, ugly, lethargic, drug-addled, screen-addicted, and hyper-sexualized, the men effeminate and the women masculine.” No elite has exalted ugliness over beauty, or criminal behavior over lawful behavior, or rejected education as a goal, instead substituting lies about history and science, when there is any education at all.

    • Tundra

      Selfishness and idleness hack at the roots of the nation. The fruit is decadence. “Decadence is a moral and spiritual disease, resulting from too long a period of wealth and power, producing cynicism, decline of religion, pessimism and frivolity. The citizens of such a nation will no longer make an effort to save themselves, because they are not convinced that anything in life is worth saving.” Total lack of initiative appears; there are no new enterprises, no risk-taking, no heroic achievement. All that remains is to squabble over the wealth remaining—which, no surprise, diminishes rapidly.

      Ouch.

      • Tundra

        I’m ok with not being a contributor to a world empire, anyway.

      • juris imprudent

        Without the greatness of RomeAmerica to believe in, whatever shall the plebs do?

  15. Rebel Scum

    Everything about this makes my blood boil.

    Biden delivers remarks on efforts to reduce the impact of Putin’s price hike on energy prices and lower gas prices at the pump for American families.

    I’ll say it again: I can’t think of anything I would be doing differently than this administration if I was actively trying to bring about the social and economic destruction of the United States.

    • Warty

      *chuckles in collapsatarian*

      • Rebel Scum

        V-shaped recovery, baby!

        And the cuntes in charge will probably opt for war with Russia as the petro-dollar gets nuked.

      • Plinker762

        I assume you are aware of the scale?

      • Tundra

        Yes. Still interesting.

    • Mustang

      There’s that “Putin’s price hike” again. I swear someone is slipping me crazy pills because I (echoing everyone here) was telling everyone who would listen two years ago all our dumbassery in response to COVID would cause this. A few friends and family heard and believe, but NOBODY CARES. Otherwise intelligent people just give blank stares. I feel like the crazy guy on the street corner with “The End Is Near” signs.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        People at work looked at me like a wizard when I told them we had been making financial decisions with high inflation in mind since Jan 2021.

    • Lackadaisical

      .’Putin’s price hike on energy prices’

      Why doesn’t he just set it to eleven billion a barrel, since he controls it? Ridiculous.

  16. Rebel Scum

    There is. It’s the same bill.

    Meanwhile on @TODAYshow: “If there’s a don’t say gay bill, there should be a don’t say straight bill”

    What are the chances that she actually read the bill?

    • juris imprudent

      Who needs to read for themselves, she has all the right people telling her what to think!

  17. juris imprudent

    sacred to Native Americans, or is the home of super-important “fragile ecosystems and wildlife.”

    So one bullshit religion or another. Hoffer was so, so right.

  18. rhywun

    OFFS we have an informal policy to keep Fridays relatively open so people can get some actual work done.

    Guess where everyone dumped a whole bunch of meetings this week?

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      I made it formal. I have a tentative meeting on my calendar for 4 hours every Friday.

    • TARDis

      If people just respected princess Di’s wishes. The world would be a better place.

    • R.J.

      Must have been really important to keep going.

    • Rat on a train

      We do that, but with potholes.

    • grrizzly

      Meanwhile in Russia is out. Meanwhile in Ukraine is in.

    • Fourscore

      Finns showed up with their push poles and cleared the road in a couple minutes.

      • EvilSheldon

        Right after they finished the sauna…

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      I’d be more impressed if they started playing shuffleboard.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Starts off with my god-awful rep.

      I despise that carpetbagging Pelosi acolyte piece of shit.

    • The Other Kevin

      For the past year, I’ve looked and looked, and in every news outlet I’ve seen ZERO coverage of Jan. 6. Meanwhile, it’s been total, wall-to-wall coverage of the Hunter laptop. Total double standard.

    • Ownbestenemy

      I skimmed that this morning and laughed it was all about Trump.

  19. The Other Kevin

    “Well, it turns out they didn’t think that through very well. ”

    The left never thinks things through. They just assume some greedy rednecks in flyover country will figure it out.

    • Tonio

      I’m even more cynical. There is a large segment of the left that hates privately-owned automobiles. This dovetails nicely with the aims of the national security state. If people can move about freely they can meet in person; if they are forced to communicate electronically the government can monitor that.

  20. Rebel Scum

    We’re going to do what we’ve been doing and we’re going to do it every day.

    Kamala Harris delivered another word salad during her bilateral meeting with the Jamaican Prime Minister.

    “For Jamaica, one of the issues that has been presented as an issue that is economic in the way its impact has been the pandemic. So to that end we are announcing today also that we will assist Jamaica in Covid recovery by assisting in terms of the recovery efforts in Jamaica that have been essential to I believe what is necessary to strengthen not only the issue of public health but also the economy,” Harris said.

    To her credit, it’s not like she can come out and say “we are going to begin laundering money through Jamaica.”

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      argleblargleboo

      • R.J.

        Tim Benzadrine?

    • Tundra

      She must be an amazing lay.

      • juris imprudent

        All the talent between her ears is below the nose.

      • Bobarian LMD

        A golf ball thru 100′ of garden hose.

      • Homple

        Chrome off a trailer hitch ball.

    • mexican sharpshooter

      I like the analogy that all her speeches are like the kid that does a book report without reading the book.

      • juris imprudent

        Just the inside cover blurb.

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        She’s like Teen Miss South Carolina talking about why kids in foreign countries can’t have maps, but less coherent.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Even Biden is more coherent.

  21. mexican sharpshooter

    https://www.defenseone.com/policy/2022/03/about-face-army-expects-shrink-next-year/363878/

    Last year, Army Chief of Staff Gen. James McConville said he’d like to add 70,000 soldiers to end strength. This year, he’s advocating “quality” over “quantity” and preparing to shrink the service by 12,000 troops, to 473,000. What happened?

    Recruiting got harder, McConville said at a Defense Writers Group event on Thursday.

    I can’t imagine why.

    “Military kids are very comfortable going into the military,” McConville said. But a lot of Americans “can’t even fathom it.”

    Gee, I can’t imagine why.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I am glad I got out when I did because I would have received an less than honorable discharge

      • mexican sharpshooter

        lol

    • R C Dean

      This year, he’s advocating “quality” over “quantity” and preparing to shrink the service by 12,000 troops, to 473,000.

      Purging wrongthinkers ain’t easy.

      • juris imprudent

        Wait until this goes from shrinks to plummets.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Being as I live this every day, nah.

        When the economy finishes imploding, the bonus of ‘three meals a day, and medical’ will start to work like a frickin’ charm.

        Recruiters will be able to just drag an MRE thru the neighborhood and make mission for the month.

      • Fourscore

        3 hots and a flop caught me. Instead of my mother telling me to make my bed The Ol’ Sarge was there

    • juris imprudent

      Military kids are very comfortable going into the military

      and we are engaged in a mighty struggle to change that.

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Their appeal has become more selective.

  22. R C Dean

    Portantino cited statistics that nearly 70% of school shootings involve a gun taken from the student’s home or the home of a friend or relative.

    Where the hell else are people going to get guns? I find it hard to believe that 30% of school shootings apparently involved, what, guns found lying on the roadside?

    And he said that more than 90% of attacks are planned in advance and in many instances follow threatening or concerning communications.

    As is typical of gang shootings. I wonder how many school shootings weren’t gang-related?

    • The Other Kevin

      Over 90% of school shootings involved bullets!

      This reminds me of those, “The number 1 cause of death in children is…” Would you sleep better at night if more children were run over by tanks?

      • Bobarian LMD

        In this scenario, do I get a tank?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        No, What do you need military hardware for? I mean did the founding father’s allow people to own cannons or warships?

    • mexican sharpshooter

      No, the 30% were purchased at Wal-Mart.

      • juris imprudent

        You could probably convince these assholes that there are gun-seller trucks that cruise neighborhoods like old fashioned ice cream trucks used to.

      • mexican sharpshooter

        Interesting business model. Reminds me of the MMJ dispensary trucks I saw in California a couple years back.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      Where the hell else are people going to get guns? I find it hard to believe that 30% of school shootings apparently involved, what, guns found lying on the roadside?

      Bought on the black market. I’m guessing those 30%, at least, are gang-related that just happened to be on school property.

    • rhywun

      I thought it was easier to buy a gun on the street than to borrow a book from the library.

      • R.J.

        They grow on trees. I get tired of raking them all up every fall.

      • one true athena

        Damn, I need one of those trees. Concealed lemons are rather less effective when mugged.

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        Have you tried squirting the lemon juice into the eyes of your attacker?

      • one true athena

        Damn it! I was just throwing them! Should’ve taken a class at my local citrus range.

      • ron73440

        Better hope it’s not this guy attacking you.

      • Grummun

        ::Makes note to dig some seedlings from RJ’s yard::

      • Sean

        I’ve got a rake.

    • The Last American Hero

      Fuck that. The haters need to get woke and take their lumps.

    • The Other Kevin

      If everyone magically had an electric car, they’d push a per mile tax to make up for the lost gas tax money.

      • Plinker762

        Our POS governor in WA just signed a ban on new vehicles built after 2030 that are not electric. He vetoed it last year because is didn’t require a per mile tax on driving.

      • juris imprudent

        And that motherfucker will still get the votes of the same idiots.

      • R.J.

        And most of Washington State is country side! There are entire areas an electric car would have no chance of reaching.

      • Plinker762

        I was talking to our SAIA (trucking) rep the other day and he said the company purchased an electric tractor. It can go about 76 miles between charges. Not quite enough to do local deliveries.

      • R.J.

        My brother lives in Twisp. It’s a hell of a drive to get there in the winter. No electric bullshit car would survive.

      • Plinker762

        Come on man, you only loose 30% of the EV’s rated range at 25 degrees. Just put on a sweater.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “A typical driver will save about $80 a month from not having to pay gas at the pump” if they just buy an electric car.”

      That more than makes up for the car payment. It’s so easy!

      • The Other Kevin

        Remember when they hammered Bush as being out of touch because he had never seen a supermarket bar code scanner before? If only we had a press that did more than “Democrats good! Republicans bad!”

    • Sensei

      And you can buy one from any dealer and they have plenty of supply!

    • Fourscore

      Obviously they have never talked to a dairy farmer but did manage to load up on bullshit nonetheless

  23. Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack

    My Ma went to college w/Ann-Margret. I should have asked her for gossip when I had the chance.

      • Tundra

        Ann Bancroft.

        With tan lines!

      • Sensei

        Drat. I always conflate those two for some reason.

      • Tundra

        Who cares?!?

        Tan lines!!

  24. grrizzly

    Vladimir Putin’s fans are happier than you are
    Research indicates that people with authoritarian tendencies find life easier and more fulfilling. What does it take to counter the emotional appeal of absolutist ideas?

    Down with Zelensky! Join Putin’s fan club. We’re so much happier here.

    • Sensei

      Who doesn’t enjoy putting a boot to a neck?

    • Sean

      It’s all that awesome communist sex!

    • mexican sharpshooter

      Join the dark side, we have cookies.

  25. one true athena

    I remember one of the best bits of the LotR cast commentary from the DVD was John-Rhys Davies basically delivering an ode to Ann-Margaret. I don’t remember the context at all, but he goes off about how she’s the most beautiful woman in the world, etc.

  26. DEG

    Excellent song. And thanks for the picture of Ann-Margaret.

    “Nobody really foresaw this huge spike in demand,” said Tim Crowley, vice president of government affairs for Lithium Nevada

    Really? Really? No one could have foreseen this?

    The Federal Election Commission (FEC) has fined Hillary Clinton’s 2016 presidential campaign and the Democratic National Committee for not properly disclosing the money they used to fund opposition research that led to a controversial dossier on President Trump’s links to Russia.

    My amateur Kremlinology says this means Clinton won’t replace Biden.

    • Dr. Fronkensteen

      Not necessarily. It could clear the way for the media to pass it off as “old news”

      See: What difference at this point does it make?

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      I think this is much more in line with what is happening in the average classroom.. I’ll say that I’ve encountered more than a few teachers who weren’t motivated by compassion or Empathy, but by a desire to receive affirmation from their peers. Yes, it’s fucking sad that they see a class of 8 year olds as their peers. Yes, they lash out in exactly the same way as an 8 year old when they’re scorned.

      • Zwak,The Baddest Johnny on the Apple Cart

        My MIL was teacher, and she said that the number of teachers who would fall into that trap was rather large. Among male teachers it leads to sleeping with the students. Women? Well, I think we are starting to see where it goes.

  27. The Hyperbole

    DAILY QUORDLE ROUNDUP*
    #66
    Champ(s)
    Teds’ 18

    Ghostpatzer 19
    The Hyperbole 19
    kinnath 21
    Plisade 23
    Trshmnstr the terrible 23
    Tundra 23
    Sean 24
    Grummun 26
    Raven Nation 26
    Grumbletarian 28
    TARDis 30

    Chump(s)
    MikeS 35

    *total score (X=11pts)

    • Sean

      Adds a new dimension. Nice.

      • The Hyperbole

        If something can’t be used to ridicule sub-Canadians is it really worth doing?

      • Bobarian LMD

        First time I’ve tried
        86
        75
        I assume that means 27 in this scoring?

      • The Hyperbole

        26, but I’ve been drinking so my maths may be wrong. 8+6+7+5. I’m making failures count as 11, one might argue that it should be 10 but there should be some penalty for failing so spectacularly. Now that I think of it a second failure will count as 13, but I doubt anyone will ever miss two words.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Is that a challenge? I am terrible at word games

      • MikeS

        but I doubt anyone will ever miss two words.

        I was hungover!

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      It’s a competition?

      Fine, I’m in

    • MikeS

      I’m sure it’s purely coincidental that you didn’t start this yesterday when I got a

      5️⃣3️⃣
      4️⃣7️⃣

      • MikeS

        lol

      • Ownbestenemy

        2️⃣9️⃣
        6️⃣8️⃣

        Was really lucky on that top right.

      • MikeS

        Other right?

      • Ownbestenemy

        Well….both I guess. I was lucky to get that 9. COINS on my first guess helped a lot but the answer didn’t on anything else.

      • Ted S.

        As I said in the midday thread, I specifically went with RATED and SONIC to use a bunch of letters, which made the other three words fairly obvious.

      • MikeS

        I’ve been using AUDIO and CHEST with mixed results.

      • The Hyperbole

        EERIE and then AREAR

      • Tundra

        I’ve been using DAILY. Creative, huh?

      • Grummun

        I’ve been using RADIO and TRUCE, also with mixed results. I’d like a with with U and E that doesn’t repeat the R.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        Grummun: How about “Rheum”?

      • The Hyperbole

        Could go with UNCLE you lose the T, but N and L are common letters.

      • Tundra

        Damn you all for getting me involved with this.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        Grummun: Ah, sorry, you may have meant “repeat the ‘R’ from the previous word.”

        Okay, how about “spume”?

  28. Sensei

    Because when you buy a $20 Chinese made IoT camera you expect top level security!

    I’m done with Wyze

    Wyze knew hackers could remotely access your camera for three years and said nothing

    • The Hyperbole

      I am not a tech (or any other kind of) nerd but doesn’t this update exonerate Wyze?

      Update March 31st, 2:57PM ET: Clarified with Bitdefender that the attack would likely require some amount of access to your local network first — which means it’s vastly less likely to happen.

      If someone has access to your local network they are going to have access to anything that uses your local network, no?

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        It’s like crossing the moat of a castle. There’s still a wall to contend with (unless you know of a weakness)

      • Grummun

        Exonerate, no. That access to the local network is “likely” necessary mitigates the risk, but wifi routers have a rocky security history, and that assumes that the owner actually configured it correctly.

        Wyze’s failure to be completely clear about the vulnerability and relative risk is a shitty move.

      • MikeS

        I am not a tech (or any other kind of) nerd

        Says the nerd who makes up word games for fun.

      • Urthona

        I use one as my aquarium camera. I guess if someone wants to break in and look at my fish it’s ok.

  29. The Bearded Hobbit

    My grandfather used the term “ugly” when he meant “angry.” Also, the phrase “things are going to get ugly” doesn’t mean “things are going to be unpleasant to look at.”

    So I have always figured that “The Good, The Bad, and The Angry” was a better title than the English translation on the original Italian. Tuco wasn’t unpleasant to look at, he was angry with his lot in life. See, for example, the argument that he has with his brother; “Your was was hard, mine was harder!”

  30. Brochettaward

    I often get asked by my fans what my favorite First is. Which one sticks out above all the rest. The question, frankly, offends me. Would you ask a parent which child is their favorite?

    • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

      Fans? The next fan you get will be your first.

      • Brochettaward

        Sir, I do not come down to your place of work and insult you while you clean jizz off the floors. I am a professional. This is what puts food on my table. I will kindly leave it at that. !!

      • JaimeRoberto (shama/lama/ding dong)

        I use your mom to clean the jizz off the floor. She’s a professional too.

  31. Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack

    I haz the ‘V1D. What prize do I win?

    (literally common cold symptoms – not even a fever)

    • slumbrew

      You get to go to happy fun camp! Wait, it’s isn’t Australia…

      It has been a pleasure knowing you.

      Can I have your CDs?

    • Sean

      A tube of horse paste?

      You’ll be fine.

      • Shpip

        Speaking of which… I haven’t had time to do a deep dive into the methodology yet.

        TL:DR — New England Journal of Medicine publishes a study saying ivermectin had no effect on COVID outcomes.

    • DEG

      Get well soon!

      I haven’t read your cruise review yet. Work has been kinda busy.

    • ron73440

      Liked the cruise review, looking forward to more.

      My wife would like to go on one, but there is no way in hell I can see myself doing that.

      I do like watching the Smithsonian channel’s shows about cruise ships, but other than the river cruises, I don’t see the appeal.

      Maybe your stories will change my mind, but I doubt it.

      • Tulip

        Try a narrow boat in England. Fantastic! I want to do it again.

      • Ownbestenemy

        I wanna do that too!

      • ron73440

        That did look like a good time when you wrote about it.

        Actually TOK’s article about the DR has us considering that.

      • rhywun

        That did look most excellent. Any of those river cruises look neat.

      • EvilSheldon

        Thirded. That looked like a good time.

      • Surly Knott

        I took a ‘hotel barge’ cruise down the Thames from Oxford to Windsor in 98. 60 miles, 6 nights. It was wonderful. I highly recommend it if anything similar is still going. This boat has relocated to France; they used to alternate France & England, but seem to have dropped England.

      • Name's BEAM. James BEAM.

        I’ve always wanted to do the various canal journeys throughout Western Europe. France’s Canal du Midi fascinates me.

        ‘Course, I also wanna walk across Southwest France in a month (shortest distance is approx. 550km). Talking the Spousal Unit into it will be, um, challenging

    • Ted S.

      I’m sorry you’re terminally ill.

    • MikeS

      If you lose your sense of smell, don’t operate LP powered machines.

      • Ownbestenemy

        But a great time to start eating ass amirte?

      • MikeS

        ^ this guy gets it ^

      • MikeS

        It came in handy when I had to clean up some dog shit one morning.

        Modern science needs to come up with pill that causes short term loss of smell. Thousands of uses!

      • slumbrew

        Party on the aft deck!

      • Ted S.

        The Libertarian Party is powering machines?

  32. Brochettaward

    but it turns out those are all on land which is either claimed to be sacred to Native Americans, or is the home of super-important “fragile ecosystems and wildlife.”

    WW3 could break out tomorrow and demand the domestic mining of these resources, and the Democrats would probably still oppose it.

    • Urthona

      Are the Native Americans not allowed to mine on their own land? Seems like a shrewd business opportunity for a group of disenfranchised Americans who tend to be way more likely to fall below the poverty line.

      I work in the casino gaming business, and I assure you quite a few Native Americans are excellent businessmen and women.

  33. Animal

    SIR, DOES THIS MEAN THAT ANN-MARGRET ISN’T COMING?

    She woulda if I’da been there. Woof woof!

  34. Ownbestenemy

    Free market is awesome. Met with the son of the landscaper yesterday, gave him the idea of what we want and agreed on price over vodka. Today the backyard was prepped with tearing out all the fake grass. Soon to have new firepit and seating area, larger amount of fake grass (I want real but Nevada…) and a nice flat area for grill, smoker and an above ground pool if we want.

    • hayeksplosives

      Nice! Yeah, we had a larger area in the back “yard” paved so we’d have a place for a picnic table and a couple of large umbrellas. Looks good; the guys did it properly with rebar etc so it will last.

      I hear you about the grass. Just not a good use of water out here. I do have several shrubs, trees, and flowering plants in pots. They are living off the dribbler type sprinkler system.

    • rhywun

      *falls out of chair*

      Wow!

      • Ted S.

        I assume the Court of Appeals will say it’s hunky-dory.

      • creech

        Yeah, but in Penna. the Supreme Court would 1)reject the map, and then 2) draw the new map and unconstitutionally foist it on the Commonwealth.

    • R.J.

      Isn’t $17,000 a bit steep for a private massage?

    • EvilSheldon

      My Mom went to Centenary and still gets the alumni stuff. I can’t wait to bring this up over Easter dinner…

    • R.J.

      No.

    • EvilSheldon

      Kinda yes.

      There wouldn’t happen to be a black latex model, would there?

      • Dr. Fronkensteen

        I think that was only for the STEVE SMITH game.

    • Rat on a train

      It’s a nice April Fools bit.

  35. one true athena

    my first guess in Worldle was 9000 miles away. There’s wrong and there’s completely opposite side of the world wrong. lol

    • rhywun

      That was asshoe. I got to 101km away on my third guess and then just played crapshoot until I lost. I don’t think any human could get that one.

      • one true athena

        Worldle and Globle have taught me there are WAY TOO MANY islands on planet Earth.

      • Ted S.

        Yeah, I had to resort to a map too.

      • rhywun

        I won’t use a map. But even my geography skillz are useless in that area.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    Pretty please?

    Last week, the leaders of the G-7 major economies called on OPEC to raise oil production amid fears of supply shortages.

    “We call on oil and gas producing countries to act in a responsible manner and to increase deliveries to international markets, noting that OPEC has a key role to play. We will work with them and all partners to ensure stable and sustainable global energy supplies,” the group said in a statement.

    The G-7 group of major economies is comprised of the U.K., U.S., Canada, Japan, Germany, France and Italy.

    It’s almost as if some rhetorical chickens have come home to roost.

    • Tundra

      The FU-5 group of not-so-major-but-still-kind-of-influential economies comprised of Russia, China, India, Iran and Saudi Arabia think those G-7 calls are cute.