Links -Saturday Morning

by | Apr 30, 2022 | Daily Links | 211 comments

It’s the end of April? Dang. Time flies when there is someone who needs something from you every waking instant of the day. I am pretty tired. Another five or six months and I might get two nights of sleep in a row.

Damn Florida Man, that’s the way to sell dope! Be a volunteer auxiliary Sheriff.

You have died of [exhaustion].

Chicks dig them bad boys. 

Today we shall listen to Anthrax.

About The Author

Brett L

Brett L

Brett set out to find America, the real America, the America of strip malls and serial killers, of butthole waxing and kelp smoothies, of cocaine and maggots. He sought it in the most American part of America—Florida: swamp gas and fever dreams, where love arrives on a rickety boat and leaves when it doesn't have the money for its fourth abortion. Oh, where has Brett gone? He’s drinking at the neck of America’s wang, chewing its foreskin and working its shaft. Brett is becoming legend. Brett can never die. Brett can never die. Brett is America, facedown in his own patriotic puke: the red his blood, the white his stomach lining, and the cold, cold blue his gas station slushie, spiked with coconut rum and tetracycline.

211 Comments

  1. Surly Knott

    Good morning Brett.
    One might also ask ‘where did all the commenters go?’ Worn out from yesterday morning’s comment-fest?

    • Fourscore

      Saturday morning and the youngsters played hard and late. They’ll wander in later.

    • UnCivilServant

      I was up until midnight finally finishing a story.

      It is now 8am. I think I got some sleep in between.

      • R.J.

        I slept on the rocky ground, as no one shared a sleeping pad. Hell of a windstorm last night. Blew the small propane tanks off the table.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      I was staring at the last thread wondering why no more comments were coming in. (and wondering what Hype’s deal is with pickles)

      • UnCivilServant

        I don’t know why he chose to go with the inferior pickle product, but at least it means we’re not fighting over the same jar.

      • Ted S.

        He makes pickle bread: a dill dough.

      • Rat on a train

        Do you have to put dill dough in a warm place for it to rise?

      • TARDis

        Of course, how else can it be basted properly. IANAD, but I thought most dill dough need to rise a bit before going into the oven.

      • Sean

        Poor taste in pickles, imo. No mention of Grillos, Bubbies, or McClures.

        He probably has poor taste in olives too.

        /Pre Quordle smack talk.

      • slumbrew

        Grillo’s are local – can confirm they’re excellent

    • Nephilium

      Battling insomnia, and getting ready to walk up to the local strudel shop to pick up something to bring for my nephew’s birthday celebration today. I was hoping to get a ride in to grab some breakfast, but low 40’s and windy do not a pleasant ride make.

    • Gender Traitor

      I completely missed last night’s “What We’re Reading” post, as we were out listening to three blues bands. They were very good, but it was LOUD, and either the mix or the acoustics or both left a lot to be desired, at least where we were sitting. By the time we got home, I was utterly exhausted.

      So…good morning to all, but speaking of reading, I have some I want to do right away. I’ll be back!

      • The Hyperbole

        Local bands or someone we may have heard of?

      • Gender Traitor

        I hadn’t heard of the first two bands, but almost certainly local. The third – the one we were really there to see – I’d call local/regional: The Sonny Moorman Group. Sonny usually plays around the Cincinnati area, so we were pleasantly surprised to see him up here in the Dayton area.

  2. Fourscore

    Everything is not always black and White as it appears to be. Strange story but with the car in a parking lot? The story gets curiouser and curiouser.

    One day Brett, you’ll remember these early days fondly, when the boys become teenagers.

    • Count Potato

      It would make sense to change cars.

      • Fourscore

        So pre-positioned?

      • Count Potato

        Probably. Or stolen if the woman wasn’t in on it.

  3. Fourscore

    “Today we shall listen to Anthrax.”

    No, we won’t.

    • juris imprudent

      Yep.

      • TARDis

        The proper response is, “You like that better than music?”

    • MikeS

      I’ll listen for you, 4X20.

  4. l0b0t

    When I was in HS, a nearby community’s police department (North Port, FL) was known as the place to score weed. Also, Grady Judd is a glad-handing, self-aggrandizing goon with a grasp of Constitutional protections that is tenuous at best. That this fellow was an exemplary employee under his watch is icing on the cake.

      • juris imprudent

        Dumb sumbitch thought he was the FBI.

    • Spartacus

      l0b0t is too kind. Grady Judd is all that and much more. He also is a leader in the Florida Sheriff’s Association and so has a lot of pull in the legislature, to the entire state’s detriment.

      • Gustave Lytton

        Sheriff Not my fault sounds like a peach.

  5. SDF-7

    Morning Brett!

    From what I understand, Brett (only having one I don’t know personally) — with your horde, you’ll soon be able to put the eldest to work helping tend to the younger ones and get a bit of a break. Although — what happened to your orphan farms as any self-respecting Glib? 😉

    “Your marketing is as appealing as cholera! You have died!”

    Re: the missing deputy (bad boys) — they do say you tend to meet prospects at church or at work. Pity her work only let her meet scumbags. (Of course, for all we know he was in there because he was sent back to try to save the future and they needed to go off or John White would never be born… [ba ba bum ba bum BUM!]

    And because I started my day crappy — the rest of y’all share share my pain (didn’t SDF it.. but I remain Dictator For Life of Chumptown, where I shall rule with an iron *cough* I mean, benevolently and not-so-wisely!):

    Daily Quordle 96
    6️⃣3️⃣
    ?7️⃣

    • Rat on a train

      Daily Quordle 96
      7️⃣4️⃣
      5️⃣6️⃣

    • rhywun

      “Your marketing is as appealing as cholera! You have died!”

      The woke lecturing in the first screenshot is a nice touch. Yeah, I’m gonna run out and buy that. ?

    • whiz

      Daily Quordle 96
      3️⃣6️⃣
      8️⃣4️⃣
      quordle.com
      ?⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
      ?⬜⬜?⬜ ⬜?⬜??
      ????? ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
      ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
      ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?⬜?⬜?
      ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?????

      ⬜⬜⬜?⬜ ??⬜⬜⬜
      ?⬜⬜⬜⬜ ?⬜⬜?⬜
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ??⬜??
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ?????
      ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ?⬜⬜?? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

    • The Last American Hero

      You don’t let the Orphans mix with the kids in the family, lest the heirs start to think of them as people and not just monocle polishers.

    • Tundra

      Daily Quordle 96
      6️⃣7️⃣
      8️⃣5️⃣

      Quordle guy was asshoe today.

      • TARDis

        Yes xe was.
        Daily Quordle 96
        5️⃣3️⃣
        8️⃣6️⃣

        Waffle sucked too.
        #waffle99 0/5

        ?????
        ?⬜?⬜?
        ?????
        ?⬜?⬜?
        ?????

        ? streak: 13
        ? #waffleelite

    • MikeS

      4️⃣6️⃣
      7️⃣3️⃣

      Quordle was interesting today. I consider a 20 to be a huge win.

      Wordle was asshoe today. Took me 6. It’s been weeks since I got a six.

  6. R.J.

    It’s quiet. Too quiet.

    • robodruid

      quiet is good.
      plenty of time to be noisy later.

      • Tres Cool

        Hey- Ive been up all night.

    • Rat on a train

      You don’t run chainsaws before 10 on Saturday.

      • Nephilium

        What was that?

        /turns off leafblower

      • R.J.

        Better.

      • SDF-7

        You work for U62 now?

      • R.J.

        Excellent reference!

  7. The Late P Brooks

    I watched “Idiocracy” last night, for the first time ever. Very enlightening. I always thought I was doing the world a favor by not reproducing. Now I’m certain of it.

    • R.J.

      Truly a great film.
      “Not now! Bate’n!”

      • slumbrew

        “I like money”

      • Nephilium

        You like money? I like money too… we should be friends.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Lead, follow, or get out of the way.

    • Brawndo

      Welcome to Costco. I love you.

    • juris imprudent

      We use “it’s got what soldiers crave” every time someone cites PLI as the ‘unprecedented capability’ in some system.

  8. Rat on a train

    Come home to find squatters have sold all your belongings

    When they had left on their vacation March 28, the apartment was fully furnished. But when they returned, practically everything was gone; the closets were cleared out and even the cabinet doors in the kitchen were missing, according to police.

    In one of the bedrooms, they found a man and a woman sleeping in one of the beds, which was the only furniture remaining.

    The strange couple woke up when the residents called out: “Hey, what are you doing here? Where’s my stuff?” Glasgow said.

    The man then told the roommates they had taken their belongings, then he and the woman started packing up their things, she said.

    Which is worse, squatters selling all your possessions or squaters that won’t leave?

    • juris imprudent

      Hmm, I think it might have been the meat wagon coming to my home in response.

    • TARDis

      How many states allow this ridiculous criminal nonsense. My dad had a POS squatter in his trailer in FL when he died. I was “allowed” to collect some of his belongings. The squatter had already stolen whatever little there was of value. The trailer was an absolute dump, so I just walked away.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        You’re supposed to set fire to it while they’re sleeping and collect the insurance.

      • Semi-Spartan Dad

        Or pay a couple good ole boys to handle the eviction.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Just shoot them and tell the cops you found them that way.

  9. Tulip

    I suck at quordle.
    6 7
    9 5

  10. l0b0t

    A great start was dashed on the rocks of that lower left word.
    Daily Quordle 96
    3️⃣5️⃣
    8️⃣2️⃣
    quordle.com
    ??⬜?⬜ ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
    ??⬜?? ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
    ????? ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
    ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ⬜??⬜⬜
    ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?????

    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ????⬜
    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ?????
    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ?⬜⬜?⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ⬜???⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ???⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

    #waffle99 2/5

    ?????
    ?⭐?⬜?
    ?????
    ?⬜?⭐?
    ?????

    ? streak: 1
    wafflegame.net

    • Grumbletarian

      Daily Quordle 96
      6️⃣7️⃣
      9️⃣5️⃣

    • MikeS

      You must use different starting words each day? I’m just baffled by all the 2s (and damn near 1s) you get.

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Hold your breath until you turn blue

    President Joe Biden and his advisers are still in conversations about how to approach November’s Group of 20 summit, whose hosts received confirmation Friday that Russian President Vladimir Putin plans to attend.

    Biden has said Russia should be ejected from the G20. Senior members of his administration have walked out of G20 events where Russian delegates are present. And there were discussions with Indonesia, which is hosting the summit, about stepping up its condemnation of Russia.

    But no decision on boycotting the leaders’ summit, still six months away, has been made. Officials said there wouldn’t likely be a decision in the near-term as they weigh the downsides of skipping the event and ceding the table to Russia and China.

    “The President has expressed publicly his opposition to President Putin attending the G20,” press secretary Jen Psaki said Friday.

    She said it was too early to say how the summit would look.

    “It is six months away. So we don’t know how to predict, we can’t predict at this point, what that will look like,” she said, adding: “We’ve conveyed our view that we don’t think they should be a part of it publicly and privately as well.”

    Pour more gasoline on the fire.

    • SDF-7

      This, the G20 discussion, kbolino’s comment below — I can’t help but keep thinking… how the hell is it we went 40 years of the actual Cold War with MAD with mostly adults in the room who understood at least how to deescalate and keep things from flaring up like this (barring Kruschev’s antics, admittedly)… and now it seems like all we have around the world are crying, petulant children who’ll smash their room and the rest of the house if they don’t get their way?

      I seriously still don’t understand why in the hell Putin didn’t just send “advisers” to the parts of Ukraine to the east that leaned his way already, recognize them as breakaway “republics” and take them under the Russian wing.

      Why we’re stupid enough to keep pushing NATO to the point where it seems like if a freaking suburb of Moscow wanted to petition us we’d say sure — all why demonizing Putin and trying to lock him out of the global markets.

      Just pure insanity, all of it.

      (Oh, and the Rodina guy in the good Count’s article with the response to “The have nukes too!” of “We’ll start over with a clean slate!” — 1) Publically revoke any rights he has to any government bunkers and see how brave he is when he can’t keep himself safe, 2) Be really clear to the Russian public that he sees them all as expendable and 3) Take away his copy of Metro or Civ or whatnot where he thinks he’ll get to rebuild the world after a global exchange… Twit).

  12. Count Potato

    “Oath Keeper, 44, sobs in court as he pleads guilty to seditious conspiracy in Capitol riot: Thug faces 20 years in prison after confessing to plotting with far-right militia leader Stewart Rhodes

    Out of hundreds of prosecutions, the case against the 11 Oath Keepers is the only one alleging participants in Capitol riot engaged in seditious conspiracy, which is defined as attempting ‘to overthrow, put down or to destroy by force the government of the United States.’

    The seditious conspiracy prosecution is the boldest publicly known attempt so far by the government to prosecute those who attacked the U.S. Capitol.”

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-10768571/Oath-Keeper-sobs-court-pleads-guilty-seditious-conspiracy-Capitol-riot.html

    IANAL, but it sounds like he took a plea, because not seeing how he was “attempting ‘to overthrow, put down or to destroy by force the government of the United States.” Were any of them even armed?

    • Grosspatzer

      “it sounds like he took a plea”

      Sure does. I shudder to think what the alternative might have been.

      • The Last American Hero

        Spend 5 more years in prison “awaiting trial”.

  13. Grosspatzer

    ?It’s getting better all the time?

    Daily Quordle 96
    6️⃣3️⃣
    7️⃣5️⃣
    quordle.com
    ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ?⬜?⬜⬜
    ⬜⬜⬜⬜? ⬜?⬜⬜⬜
    ⬜⬜?⬜⬜ ?????
    ⬜???? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ??⬜?? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

    ⬜⬜⬜?⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
    ⬜⬜⬜?⬜ ?⬜⬜⬜⬜
    ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜?⬜⬜
    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬜?⬜??
    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ?????
    ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
    ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

    #waffle99 3/5

    ?????
    ?⭐?⬜?
    ??⭐??
    ?⬜?⭐?
    ?????

    ? streak: 7
    wafflegame.net

      • Grosspatzer

        I am in awe of your geographical skills. Took me 3 guesses to get the right continent. But I did not need to cheat, which is the definition of easy.

        #Worldle #99 4/6 (100%)
        ???⬜⬜↙️
        ???⬜⬜⬅️
        ?????⬅️
        ??????
        https://worldle.teuteuf.fr

      • TARDis

        Your comment helped me cheat. Still got it wrong.
        #Worldle #99 2/6 (100%)
        ?????⬅️
        ??????
        https://worldle.teuteuf.fr

      • The Hyperbole

        Much improved from my 10 yesterday
        ? Apr 30, 2022 ?
        ? 16 | Avg. Guesses: 7
        ??? = 3

        #globle

      • rhywun

        Ring around country… barf.

        ? Apr 30, 2022 ?
        ? 1 | Avg. Guesses: 9
        ????????
        ? = 9

        #globle

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        These posts are getting weird.

      • Rat on a train

        Yep
        #Worldle #99 1/6 (100%)
        ??????

    • Penguin

      Daily Quordle 96
      4️⃣7️⃣
      8️⃣5️⃣

      Meh.

      • Ozymandias

        Daily Quordle 96
        5️⃣6️⃣
        8️⃣4️⃣
        quordle.com
        ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜?
        ⬜⬜⬜⬜? ?⬜⬜⬜?
        ⬜⬜??⬜ ⬜?⬜⬜⬜
        ??⬜?? ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
        ????? ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
        ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?????

        ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬜??⬜⬜
        ⬜⬜?⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜⬜?
        ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
        ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ?????
        ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
        ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
        ⬜??⬜? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
        ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
        Bottom left one is asshoe.

      • Grummun

        6 4
        9 7

        Bottom left should have been more obvious, given my pastimes. I’ll take the no-chump and call it a good day.

    • Sean

      Daily Quordle 96
      5️⃣2️⃣
      9️⃣7️⃣
      quordle.com
      ⬜⬜??⬜ ??⬜??
      ⬜⬜?⬜⬜ ?????
      ?⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ⬜???? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

      ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜⬜?⬜
      ⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜ ⬜⬜?⬜⬜
      ⬜⬜?⬜⬜ ?⬜⬜?⬜
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬜?⬜??
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ??⬜??
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ??⬜??
      ⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ?????
      ⬜??⬜? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
      ????? ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛

  14. The Late P Brooks

    Psaki said there were no indications Russia was willing to engage in serious diplomacy.

    “There’s a lot that could happen between now and then, but we certainly haven’t seen an indication to date of Russia’s plan to participate in diplomatic talks constructively,” she said. “Our hope certainly is that will change because obviously diplomatic talks and conversations is the way to bring an end to this conflict and President Putin could end this tomorrow, could end this right now.”

    Unconditional surrender or nothing.

    • kbolino

      In an administration full of the most obnoxious and self-entitled people on the face of the Earth, they can’t find one person actually willing to negotiate, and not simply lecture and act smarmy, to send over there.

    • Brawndo

      I’m pretty sure Putin and Zelensky were set to sit down for negotiations and then the US/NATO allies sent Ukraine a bunch of weapons and cash.

      Ukraine is a massive source of untraceable cash for the very worst politicians in the US and probably other Western countries too, and they’ll put us all in the cross hairs to keep that gravy train going.

    • Ted S.

      Black guys going for white women. All of the black women are going to be *pissed*.

    • Ted S.

      But gentlemen marry brunettes.

    • slumbrew

      “ Paternoster is a fellow athlete who played soccer at Princeton University,”

      GlibFit

  15. The Late P Brooks

    The fleas think they own the circus

    Twitter (TWTR.N) Chief Executive Parag Agrawal sought to quell employee anger on Friday during a company-wide meeting where employees demanded answers to how managers planned to handle an anticipated mass exodus prompted by Elon Musk.

    The meeting comes after Musk, the Tesla (TSLA.O) chief executive who sealed a $44 billion deal to buy the social media company, repeatedly criticized Twitter’s content moderation practices and a top executive responsible for setting speech and safety policies.

    ——-

    “I’m tired of hearing about shareholder value and fiduciary duty. What are your honest thoughts about the very high likelihood that many employees will not have jobs after the deal closes?” one Twitter employee asked Agrawal, in a question read aloud during the meeting.

    *outright, prolonged laughter*

    • kbolino

      What are your honest thoughts about the very high likelihood that many employees will not have jobs after the deal closes?

      WDATPDIM?

      Agrawal can say he loves you like Jesus loved his disciples, but he would still be blowing smoke up your ass if/once Elon owns the company.

    • Grumbletarian

      Build your own Twitter?

    • rhywun

      Inorite

    • Spartacus

      This sounds just like a department meeting. Lots of people spending tons of time and energy worrying about things that haven’t happened.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The honest answer is that Twitter doesn’t exist to provide jobs.

      In its current formulation, it exists to launder propaganda for the government and multi-national equity firms.

      It should exist to turn a profit.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Employees also told executives they feared Musk’s erratic behavior could destabilize Twitter’s business, and hurt it financially as the company prepares to address the advertising world in a presentation next week in New York City.

    Nice talking point, bro.

    • R.J.

      You mean the business that was tanking already and cooking the books?

      • SDF-7

        They’re worried Elon will cut off that sweet, sweet CIA funding keeping them afloat…

      • Brawndo

        Would he though? Elon is not above government subsidies/contracts, and if the analyses that he’s put himself into a vulnerable position because of Tesla shares and whatever is going on w China are true, he’d be more likely to keep that going than not I think.

      • SDF-7

        Dunno. Seems like it would be hard to keep shutting down anything outside-the-narrative without it being too obvious and defeating the purpose.

        Not convinced on the whole Tesla share price weakness either — given that a lot of it seems tied to “And Tesla shares dropped when he announced!” but the market as a whole has taken a massive beating over the past few weeks, more due to the recession becoming obvious. (And boy do I wish I’d sold my vesting options when they vested instead of thinking “We were a few bucks up a share just last month.. let the market settle and come back to that”.)

      • juris imprudent

        I feel your pain on thinking “oh, our share price already has the bad news priced in”.

    • kbolino

      They seem to have gotten the impression they have more job security than even government employees.

    • Grosspatzer

      Erratic behavior? I’m not seeing it, but that would disqualify someone from being the Chief Executive of a large enterprise. You know who else is behaving erratically?

    • Nephilium

      I’m entertained this comes out right after the admission in their report that they were miscounting active users for something like 3 years.

    • R C Dean

      What these morons don’t comprehend is that after the buyout, Musk’s behavior won’t affect the price oof a single share that he doesn’t own, and then fiduciary duty of management will run exclusively to Musk.

    • kbolino

      Uh, what happened to Tim Allen?

      • kbolino

        Yeah, but he’s also no A-lister. I doubt Chris Evans came cheap.

    • SDF-7

      Yeah — I noticed a trailer and quickly categorized this as right up there with Disney Direct-To-VHS sequels of the past. I was done with the franchise at Toy Story 3: The Apocalypse anyway.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        You mean, you didn’t like Little Mermaid 2: Ariel Sucks at Parenting?

      • SDF-7

        About as much as Beauty and the Beast 2: Christmas with your Kidnapper!

      • SDF-7

        Brother Bear 2: Wait.. someone watched Brother Bear in the First Place?

      • UnCivilServant

        Cinderella 2: Bridezilla

      • SDF-7

        The Lion King 2: Simba Sucks at Parenting… (Disney has a real theme… parents either suck or are dead….)

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Cinderella 2: Bridezilla

        Cinderella 3: A Time Travel Story because every sci-fi series has to have a time travel story

        /I wish I wasn’t serious

      • Mojeaux

        Parent(s) being absent is critical to the formation of a good fairy tale/morality tale/hero’s journey. It provides the character freedom to embark on their adventures. Often for girls, the mother figure is gone and the dad is either hapless or overworked.

  17. Chafed

    Brett has excellent musical taste. That’s how you stay awake when you’re sleep deprived.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    Do you believe in magic?

    The federal government will spend $5 billion dollars to build 500,000 chargers. The money will go to states, who have until late summer to submit their plans to the federal government.

    The funding comes with strings attached – strings intended to ensure that this network of chargers is fast, reliable, and convenient.

    To that end, states are to prioritize building chargers along the interstate highway system. Each charging station is required to include at least four fast-speed plug-ins. And chargers must be non-proprietary, meaning they connect to more than one auto brand.

    Just reach into the magic hat, and Presto!

    • Grosspatzer

      Building chargers is easy. The magic is in supplying the juice. They’re tilting at windmills.

      • juris imprudent

        $100 says they build and deploy the chargers, but never connect them to the grid because “who’s going to pay for that”.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        I’ll take that bet. I think they go “nice power company you have there. It’d be a shame if something happened to it”

      • Sensei

        Also the regulatory state in some places considers this electricity distribution.

        So in some places they have to charge you per minute and in other place per kWh. Since cars charge at different rates depending on temperature and state of charge kWh is preferred, but this isn’t possible in all states.

      • Sensei

        You’d think it would be.

        Not that your point isn’t valid, but they are quite expensive to build, vandalized because assholes want to make a point, blocked by ICE vehicles because assholes want to make a point, and blocked by state and local governments because assholes want to make a point.

        Tesla has this down to a science, but here in People’s Republic of NJ the time from announcement to completion for DC fast charging runs 18 to 30+ months. This is for facilities with 8 stalls.

      • Gustave Lytton

        blocked by ICE vehicles because assholes want to make a point

        *sees lot full except for 3 empty spots in front of unused chargers, looks at sign that says “electric vehicles only”, parks ICEgas-electric truck and walks away*

      • Sensei

        On “courtesy” low power chargers I don’t care much about that.

        I’m talking the actual DC fast charging stations. They are usually in the back of large parking lots in mall, strip centers, and food and fuel places.

        It’s obvious that some asshole in a jacked up diesel truck is making a point.

      • Gustave Lytton

        I didn’t realize there was a difference. I have seen those but apparently the rolling coal type assholes were not around either. Still sitting empty.

      • Gustave Lytton

        OT: JPY is down to a hair under 130. Unreal. Time to do some shopping.

      • Sensei

        I actually want to visit, but that’s still impossible.

    • kbolino

      On the one hand, nothing gets done anymore without subsidies, because why would you do it for hard-earned bucks when money is almost literally falling from trees, but on the other hand, how many government subsidies were necessary to build all these damn gas stations?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Those were subsidized because the government didn’t penalize the externalities.

        Don’t you even prog, bro?

      • juris imprudent

        Sure gas taxes were collected, but it was wrong to spend that money on roads. /also prog

      • rhywun

        Watch the left break their necks pivoting between green fantasies and yet more handouts to Elon Man Bad.

    • SDF-7

      You know — maybe if the government has to keep trying to fake a market and force behaviors that’s a clue that things aren’t ready and there’s a longer term economic viability problem with trying to make the whole country early adopters, you twits….

      (Setting aside the whole how the Fed justifies doing any of this… I know, I know… somehow the Clean Air Act justifies anything they can say impacts climate somehow.)

      • Q Continuum

        Those palms ain’t gonna grease themselves!

    • Brawndo

      That comes to 10,000 per charger. Seems excessive.

    • Count Potato

      More coal-powered cars!

  19. The Late P Brooks

    By some estimates it could take $40 billion – 8 times the amount the federal government will provide – to build all those chargers.

    But Britta Gross, at energy consulting firm RMI, says this is an important start that could help jumpstart private investment.

    “That could be the confidence-inspiring trigger that says, ‘Hey, private investment, pick up now where the federal government has now stepped aside, and now it’s time for the free market to take this thing into scale,'” she says.

    I don’t think that’s how it works.

    • rhywun

      Yeah, I’m thinking it’s more likely to put everyone the government doesn’t deem the winner out of business.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Beauty and the Beast 2: Christmas with your Kidnapper!

    Stockholm is so lovely, this time of year.

    • Mojeaux

      Hey! Don’t underestimate the pull of a good Stockholm syndrome romance.

      • TARDis

        Hanging With Chad

      • rhywun

        And for the adventurous, Hung Chad.

  21. Grumbletarian

    Where the hell did April go?

    ? Long time passing, ?

    • SDF-7

      Nice.

      I was leaning towards “Down the drain… to meet up with the turtles” myself.

    • Mojeaux

      I measure months by when the rent is due.

  22. The Late P Brooks

    In other fleas-versus-circus news

    For Meridian, 17, a trans nonbinary person from Virginia seeking their first job, their interest in Starbucks went beyond salary or benefits. “I live in a very rural town,” they explained to me. “I thought, what is an environment that I want to be in, in this very small-town job? And Starbucks appealed to me because they seemed like a very progressive company and I thought I would be in good company there.”

    Workers, when asked, say they enjoy the work. The environment Starbucks tries to cultivate and the values it espouses bring in a certain type of employee. “Starbucks attracts a lot of progressive-minded people,” said Cory Johnson, 28, who works at the Boulevard and Myers Starbucks in Richmond, Virginia. “People who are either doing some kind of activism or organizing outside of work.” Co-workers throughout interviews for this piece referred to each other as “family.”

    But when the COVID-19 pandemic began, many of the elements that created this progressive, community-oriented atmosphere disappeared, as face-to-face interactions with customers were now considered a health risk. Cafés shut down, leaving transactions to the drive-through window, as well as new demand from an old source: mobile ordering.

    This shift is one of the quiet reasons why we’ve seen over two dozen Starbucks stores unionize over the past couple of months, with hundreds more potentially on the way. The pandemic exacerbated long-standing problems that had damaged Starbucks’s relationship with its workers, and those workers had the organizing chops to address those problems through collective action.

    It’s a sweatshop. Welsh coal miners had it good, compared to the bitransbinarysexdysmorph Starbucks army.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      For Meridian, 17, a trans nonbinary person from Virginia seeking their first job

      Somebody’s got to pay for all those hormones…

      I hear the Army is a good option these days.

      • Count Potato

        This person might not be taking hormones or anything, as “trans nonbinary” is pretty much bullshit.

    • rhywun

      You think sometime during all that “organizing” these kids can learn how to make a decent cup of coffee?

  23. Sensei

    When Fire Island isn’t woke enough.

    A Black Man Ran to Gay Enclaves to Feel Safe. But Was He Welcome?

    So, when the world turned upside down and everything seemed to no longer make sense, I escaped to Fire Island to hide. As I was running down the wooden walkways of the Pines, I passed “Black Lives Matter” signs and began to feel the heat inside me grow. A question kept rattling inside my head I’d never really considered before: If these places love Black people so much, why do none of us live here?

    That’s as far as I could make it.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Paywalled. I’m generally curious to hear about the travails of a rich man who can afford to hideaway in gay summer camps for weeks on end.

      • Sensei

        I think if you clear cookies you can get a free look. If I recall I have javascript blocked which means I can’t navigate from page to page, but will display if you jump to the link from a search engine.

        I won’t pay either the NYT or WP.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Tor worked:

        Like me, Mr. Dash ran there, too, in the summer of 2020. Like me, he had fallen in love with Fire Island, first going there in the summer of 2015 as a day-tripper, lounging on the beach before heading to Low Tea, a popular happy hour on the island that was being D.J.-ed by one of the most beloved artists on the island, Lina Bradford, a Black transgender woman. He was hooked, returning for a longer stay the only way he could afford to at the time by finding summer jobs there that also provided housing. Eventually, he figured out a way to buy a share within the elusive Pines rental network that remains competitive. But summer 2020 was different, as the video of the murder of George Floyd replayed again and again. People began speaking about their experiences in ways he’d never seen before.

        Then the graffiti incident happened, and everything changed for him.

        Someone spray-painted ‘BLM’ on a building in Cherry Grove, a Facebook debate broke out and a division was made very clear. Some white residents commented that the community must find out who had done this and involve law enforcement. Others tried to remind people that calling the police would only perpetuate the issues that the graffiti was trying to raise. Mr. Dash watched this online debate breakout before moderators had to shut it all down and decided that he’d publish his own response to some white residents to stop being anti-Black.

        OMFG. Somebody got pissed that their building was vandalized and it’s the end of the world for blacks, but more specifically black gays, and even more specifically black transgender women.

        These people are so far up their own narcissistic assholes that it’s hard to to describe. They pretend to identify with George Floyd, but they wouldn’t be caught near the ghetto. They’re living in one of the most exclusive places in the world that allows them to be their fullest egotistical selves.

      • rhywun

        Not paywalled here.

        Still won’t read garbage agitprop.

      • Sensei

        I feel obligated to do so. Same with the WP. Pre Trump the WP was actually “relatively” balanced.

        My reason being that I want to see what the current prog thinking is and what the next horror is they will be inflicting against the wishes of large percentage of the US.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        Pre Trump the WP was actually “relatively” balanced.

        Mark Levin made a career on exposing the WP’s bullshit pre-Trump.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    Existing workers during this time were frustrated as they hadn’t seen a raise in years, persevering through the most dangerous and difficult parts of the pandemic while watching new employees earn the same wages as they did. And inflation eroded whatever gains any of them might have made from distress pay or promotions.

    The catalyst, as it were, for the Westchester Commons Starbucks partners in Richmond was the December 2021 omicron wave. As Meridian tells it, “They [management] got rid of the plexiglass at our front registers. We have a lot of partners who were uncomfortable with that. So we wrote this very lovely, polite open letter to management saying … cases are on the rise, we feel pretty uncomfortable if customers don’t have to wear their masks.”

    The open letter was drafted by several workers. It states in part, “With numerous partners living with immunocompromised family members or being at high risk themselves, we urge you to please consider the following [policy proposals] in restructuring store procedures for this fiscal year.” The list included temporarily closing the café and only doing drive-through to slow the spread of omicron; asking for plexiglass barriers between themselves and customers; setting a capacity limit for the inside of the store for customers; and instituting a grab-and-go format for mobile orders to limit contact between partners and patrons.

    According to Meridian, management reacted by “laugh[ing] in our face … [saying] that we’re ungrateful, that if you don’t like Starbucks you should quit.”

    The doomsday LARPers were having a wonderful time until the big kkkorporate meanies pulled the plug.

    It’s funny how delusional narcissisms multiply and overlap.

    • rhywun

      I’m starting to like Starbucks management.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      With numerous partners living with immunocompromised family members or being at high risk themselves

      This appears to be the new victimhood.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        I’m now expecting a whole new class of Munchausen by Proxy lunatics who try to give their kid cancer so they have an “immunocompromised” family member.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    So, when the world turned upside down and everything seemed to no longer make sense, I escaped to Fire Island

    WHEEEEEE!

  26. The Late P Brooks

    PANDEMIC RESTRICTIONS ARE often framed as though they are preventing people from returning to work, due to their non-willingness to comply with COVID safety measures. What is often lost in the statistics is that, while the American people are “tired” of the pandemic, a majority support COVID safety measures for this very reason. At Meridian’s store, unionization efforts kicked off as workers saw their managers treat their health, safety, and potentially their lives with contempt.

    Sampling errors are a myth.

    • rhywun

      PANDEMIC RESTRICTIONS ARE often framed as though they are preventing people from returning to work, due to their non-willingness to comply with COVID safety measures.

      I have literally never seen this thought expressed in a mainstream media outlet. It is always – always – presented as workers are too scared to return.

      • Mustang

        It’s doublethink. This is no-shit propaganda. They’re framing it as though it’s the rebels’ fault the economy sucks because they won’t comply with a few little safety measures.

      • Nephilium

        Look, it’s just a mask, it won’t hurt you…

        Look, it’s just a safe and effective vaccine, it won’t hurt you…

    • Gustave Lytton

      a majority support COVID safety measures

      Stated vs revealed preference.

  27. Sensei

    The snowflakes in NYC are never going to reach peak stupid.

    New Yorkers don’t feel safe at home anymore

    NEW YORK – It’s a sweltering spring day in New York City, but Dana Aber stands on the Times Square-42 Street subway platform in a heavy leather jacket. Her hands are gloved and stuffed in her pockets to hide her jewelry. Although she tries to look relaxed, her senses are on high alert.

    “I thought maybe it would be just a little bit better protection than a thin coat, in case I got shot,” said Aber, a theater actor and writer from Manhattan.

    It will work just as well as that mask against COVID.

    • Fourscore

      When Superman dons a mask I don a mask. Until then, no donning.

    • rhywun

      it’s reality for many New Yorkers who feel helpless and afraid

      Define “many”. ?

      as the NYPD struggles to rein in crime

      Prosecutors and judges twiddle their thumbs, waiting for the cops to bring some criminals in front of them already.

      Economic and social hardships brought on by the pandemic played a role in the increase in crime

      Oh fuck off already.

    • R C Dean

      Although she tries to look relaxed, her senses are on high alert.

      Why do I suspect he situational awareness is . . . lacking?

  28. The Late P Brooks

    We had to destroy the economy in order to save it

    Yellen argued that the alternative to huge government spending was an economic downturn that “could match the Great Depression.”

    “Given this uncertainty, the recovery packages sought to protect against tail risk,” she said. “They were not just tailored to address the median outcome.”

    Still, a recent Federal Reserve Bank of San Francisco analysis points to massive government spending during the pandemic as the reason for U.S. inflation surging more than in other developed economies.

    “Fiscal support measures designed to counteract the severity of the pandemic’s economic effect may have contributed to this divergence by raising inflation about 3 percentage points by the end of 2021,” wrote Òscar Jordà, Celeste Liu, Fernanda Nechio and Fabián Rivera-Reyes in the San Francisco Fed’s weekly Economic Letter.

    There is now growing fear on Wall Street that a recession is looming in the next two years as a result of the Russian war in Ukraine, soaring inflation and an increasingly hawkish Federal Reserve. With the consumer price index at a 40-year high, the U.S. central bank is moving quickly to raise rates in an effort to cool demand.

    Goldman Sachs, Bank of America and Deutsche Bank are among the firms that have predicted an economic downturn in coming years.

    We had to panic and completely destabilize the economy over the hysterical fears of a bunch of “public health” bureaucrats. There was no alternative. Now we just need to get more money into people’s hands, so they can afford the higher prices. That’s how you fix inflation.

    • Fourscore

      Each person needs access to a printing press that will limit the amount of money printed to that person’s “needs”. No one will be allowed excess cash.

    • R C Dean

      Fiscal support measures designed to counteract the severity of the pandemic’s economic effect may have contributed to this divergence by raising inflation about 3 percentage points by the end of 2021

      I think this is the proverbial modified limited hangout. They are dipping their toe in the water. And, purely by coincidence, pointing the finger at Congress in hopes none of the blame splashes on them.

    • trshmnstr the terrible

      In that first pic, Joe and Jill look like giants. What is going on there?

      • Peter Lorre, contemplating a Crime

        A bit of PS, but not too far from the original.

  29. The Late P Brooks

    I’m starting to like Starbucks management.

    Seriously. Every time I see another breathless profile of “Howard Schultz, UNIONBUSTER!” I get a warm fuzzy feeling.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    I’m now expecting a whole new class of Munchausen by Proxy lunatics who try to give their kid cancer so they have an “immunocompromised” family member.

    My money is on “immunocompromised” as the next big fad ailment. Forget about those dumb digestive tract problems. You’re nobody until your very next breath could KILL YOU!

    • Nephilium

      Nah. I’m leaning towards long COVID.

      • Tundra

        Long COVID is the new fibromyalgia.

      • Chafed

        ?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Nope. Long COVID doesn’t put a enough of a burden on everyone else. If you can’t use it as a moral cudgel, what’s the point?

    • Fourscore

      I told my wife I was calendar compromised so she threw away all the calendars.

  31. The Late P Brooks

    These people are so far up their own narcissistic assholes that it’s hard to to describe. They pretend to identify with George Floyd, but they wouldn’t be caught near the ghetto. They’re living in one of the most exclusive places in the world that allows them to be their fullest egotistical selves.

    No kidding. Those guys should go flouncing around East St Louis in their frilly dresses, twirling their vintage parasols, and see what happens.

  32. LCDR_Fish

    Been on another Carolla kick lately. Great ep from him and Drew: https://adamanddrdrewshow.com/1552-you-are-i-am/

    For narcissists (ie. most of the political class) – if they say “You are” [a nazi, a homophobe, etc] – translate that to “I am” and it makes perfect sense.

  33. KSuellington

    In Salvador, Brazil in the late 90’s I saw firsthand a drive through coke stand in a favela that was guarded by the military police. That was not particularly surprising to me, but it was surprising how blatant they were being about it. At least 7-8 cops in full uniform, some with rifles leaning up against marked police cars with the blues and reds flashing to advertise the spot.

  34. l0b0t

    The final 7 episodes of Ozark just dropped. There goes my afternoon.

    • Nephilium

      Yeah, they dropped yesterday. I’m on the second episode now.

  35. Tundra

    Good morning, Bret!

    And good morning to all of you shiny, happy people!

    Wild beat the Avs, Blues lost. All is (momentarily) right with the world.

    • Ownbestenemy

      The conference will be interesting. While I will be cheering the Kings they have little chance with their trash PP and PK unless Doughty comes back. We did well against the Oilers in regular season but that is all out the window

      I am just happy the Knights are out.

      • Tundra

        I’m just glad the Wild start on home ice. Bad enough that they start with the Blues.

    • rhywun

      All is (momentarily) right with the world.

      Rangers beat the Caps. Agreed.

  36. Sean

    #waffle99 3/5

    ?????
    ?⭐?⬜?
    ??⭐??
    ?⬜?⭐?
    ?????

    ? streak: 7
    wafflegame.net

  37. Threedoor

    Congrats on the baby. We had a surprise pregnancy last spring and all is well here with a two month old. Already sleeping through the night. Sadly like her older brother after about six months she’ll likely never nap again and wont go to bed until ten. Sleeping through the night early is not much of a blessing.

    • R C Dean

      We had a surprise pregnancy last spring

      I can think of a few ways a pregnancy could be a surprise, and they range from “statistically unlikely” to “somebody’s not telling you something”.