Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack
on April 27, 2022 at 7:31 pm
Pudding button LOL
rhywun
on April 27, 2022 at 7:33 pm
also LOL
juris imprudent
on April 27, 2022 at 7:38 pm
That had to be the easy one – it replaced the diet coke button.
Count Potato
on April 27, 2022 at 8:04 pm
What’s the other button?
Draw Me Like One of Your Tulpae, Jack
on April 27, 2022 at 8:40 pm
Nukes
MikeS
on April 27, 2022 at 7:47 pm
Pudding….Nukes….
hahaha. Good stuff, CPRM!
Count Potato
on April 27, 2022 at 8:05 pm
Oh, nukes, thanks, I couldn’t make it out.
The Other Kevin
on April 27, 2022 at 7:48 pm
Fantastic. Love the attempt at a narrow gaze.
Hyperion
on April 27, 2022 at 7:53 pm
Where’s Cornpop fit into all of this? If want to stop Putin, you gotta have a bad dude who runs a bunch of bad boys.
Hyperion
on April 27, 2022 at 7:55 pm
Hey Putin, I’m sending over Cornpop so you better stop it right now. He has a pool chain! Sh!!!!, he’s black, but he’s a smart one and doesn’t even speak with a negro accent if he tries and he cleans up real good.
One of our liaison guys retired from the Air Force years ago. I was asked to give an address to his party at the NCO club. I couldn’t come up with anything so I went with this:
“You know, Butler and I have had some good times on road trips over the years. Like, there was this one time in Omaha. . . oh, I guess I shouldn’t tell that story here. But there was this time in Sacramento. . . well, I guess I need to skip that one, too. But this time in. . . In closing I want to wish Butler the best in his retirement and future plans. Good night.”
I then handed him his retirement card with an eightball of coke inside.
pistoffnick
on April 27, 2022 at 9:42 pm
*adds The Bearded Hobbit to my retirement party list*
The Easter Bunny running interference for the “Leader of the Free World” has got to have been a new low for the presidency.
I do like how the bunny head has a booming voice but no ability to make any more sense than Joe, since the voice must be a figure of his imagination. Kind of like the invisible friend Biden shook hands with at that press conference.
hayeksplosives
on April 27, 2022 at 9:23 pm
Figment, not figure, dammit.
Anyway, beautifully done CPRM!!
Peter Lorre, contemplating a Crime
on April 27, 2022 at 9:43 pm
Short version is that he called the cops to report theft of $77,000 cash and a Glock, but when the cops got there she (name redacted but it’s obviously his wife) claimed he started choking her when he found that the money was missing.
The cops released hthe tape of the call. I still don’t know what the truth is, but I ain’t voting for that guy..
rhywun
on April 27, 2022 at 10:13 pm
Yikes. Is that like a county executive?
hayeksplosives
on April 28, 2022 at 12:38 am
Yeah, and Pahrump isn’t an incorporated city yet is the Nye country seat, so the real “power” here is at the county level.
On the plus side, that means our top cop, the sheriff, is an elective office, unlike a police chief.
But the county commissioner needs to GO. I’m glad Nye county district attorney tossed this case over the wall to another county (not Clark, which is Vegas) so there’s no apparent conflict of interest.
Stopped at a local workwear store today to pick up a shirt. Got to talking to the owner about clothing manufacturers and he went down a path of decrying offshoring to China and their use of prison and slave labor. Ok, I’m on board. And yet he prominently carries this stuff, which frankly I find a whole lot more troubling:
I like the aims of the program, but the money making aspect of it becomes it’s own goal. All of the prison labor bothers me. It’s seen as a cheaper money saving option (or even requirement) but it crowds out true private sector alternatives and I question whether such programs can be truly voluntary. My feeling is they’re inherently coercive (vs non-participation options, favorable treatment for parole/probation decisions, etc) and the difference from Chinese prison labor is merely degree.
The shop had a large selection of Prison Blues, not so much Big Bill.
ron73440
on April 27, 2022 at 9:52 pm
You can’t be racist, you’re not a Republican!
What they actually believe.
Well done CPRM!
Brochettaward
on April 27, 2022 at 10:53 pm
I have to disagree. The individual Democrats believe that as long as they vote Democrat, that this magically makes them not racist. But in the victimhood games they play, other Democrats can full well be racists. It’s a competition of ever increasing pettiness and constantly shifting goalposts with the hoped for end result being to show that you are in fact the most virtuous…the most anti-racist that ever anti-racisted.
creech
on April 27, 2022 at 11:05 pm
Anyone happen to catch “Survivor” on tv tonite? The race card was played, and everyone groveled.
The Gunslinger
on April 28, 2022 at 6:39 am
I was watching. I was like, blah blah blah, can we get to a vote already? CBS has gone full woke with their casting.
Peter Lorre, contemplating a Crime
on April 27, 2022 at 10:36 pm
I found this on Discus, too funny to not share,
“As a LGBQT+++ pan sexual, gender fluid, cis, transracial,hermaphrodite, LatinX that, today, identifies as a quad sexual pterodactyl I have to say that this filth (Matt Walsh) literally is a literal mortal literal threat to my literal mental health and literal physical well being…. Literally. This book is problematic in so many ways. I mean for Christ’s sakes I’m pregnant with a transgender centaur and I might lose they/them to the stress that’s triggering to me. I sure hope Amazon does the right thing and bans Matt Walsh from ever waxing his dolphin again…. I meant to say bans this book. I’m literally scared for my literal life because of this book. Hopefully Bezos can convene a Truth & Reconciliation Council one day and Matt Walsh can face the wrath of a someone who likes to take “inappropriate” showers with their daughter. If this menace Walsh is not stopped soon he’ll be writing about a creep that touches children to achieve sexual gratification for himself…. especially poolside with the kiddos rubbing his hairy legs. Anyways x x’s”
Chafed
on April 27, 2022 at 10:48 pm
MLW’s reviews have taken a weird turn.
Peter Lorre, contemplating a Crime
on April 27, 2022 at 10:51 pm
It’s a kids book FFS, haters gonna hate I guess,
hayeksplosives
on April 28, 2022 at 12:41 am
That so much of that parody is based on fact is truly disturbing.
Chafed
on April 27, 2022 at 10:53 pm
Excellent CPRM. For a moment I thought the rabbit was Brochettaward. Really liked the kind words for SP.
Brochettaward
on April 27, 2022 at 11:00 pm
I would never say those words about another human being. It would be un-First like.
Bhad Barbie, the catcha outside girl, made $52 million on Only Fans. She did not provide even one First to the world. What am I Firsting for you cheap fucks for?
The Bearded Hobbit
on April 27, 2022 at 11:22 pm
$20?
Chafed
on April 27, 2022 at 11:37 pm
I’m proud to say I have no idea who she is.
rhywun
on April 28, 2022 at 5:45 am
She has her own language or something. The couple articles I skimmed with her somehow getting herself in the news were completely impenetrable to normal people.
Three unrelated words that are not coherent. Use that at a stand up routine at an old people’s home and you’ll have the audience laughing and/or in tears.
Sean
on April 28, 2022 at 6:33 am
It’s still distant, but the reality of it seems to be approaching me.
I haven’t followed the story closely, but I gather Ohio’s redistricting process has been a similar fiasco.
Early voting is under way for Ohio’s May 3 primary with statewide, congressional, and local races on the ballot. Without constitutional maps, state legislative races were removed from the ballots. A second primary will need to take place for those races.
rhywun
on April 28, 2022 at 5:50 am
Wow, that’s huge. My critter was one of the ones targeted for elimination.
“In other news, E.S. Bunny Esq has filed a lawsuit against a court in Iowa…”
Gender Traitor
on April 28, 2022 at 5:43 am
Good morning, homey, U, and Sean!
I have to take Little Black Cat in to the vet for a routine shot this afternoon. I hope he’s as well behaved as Big Sweet But Dumb Cat was. I also hope he’ll forgive me some day. ??
Dolphins are assholes and the rapists of the sea. Don’t trust them.
Grosspatzer
on April 28, 2022 at 6:28 am
Carl Hiaasen nailed it in “Native Tongue”, in which a villain meets his demise at the hands fins of a dolphin channeling SEA SMITH. The villain screams “I’m being fucked to death by a fish!” Oh, and the dolphin is Dickie the Dolphin, a featured attraction at the theme park.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:29 am
I thought it was “Candygram”.
Tres Cool
on April 28, 2022 at 6:34 am
They used that one, too.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:38 am
So much coke that they forgot that they’d already used the premise.
Tres Cool
on April 28, 2022 at 6:43 am
I think John Landis said that he actually budgeted in the cost of all the coke they were going through into Blues Brothers.
I’m not sure how much sleep I got last night. I lay down at 5pm with the lights on. Next thing I know I’m looking at the clock going “Oh, it’s one in the afternoon” (It wasn’t) Then a bit later more coherently realizing it was 330 in the morning. But I still didn’t drag myself out of bed and turn off the lights until after my alarms said to get up and get ready for work.
If it’s any consolation, I’m ashamed of my body too. Age, gravity and entropy are not your friends.
Tres Cool
on April 28, 2022 at 6:35 am
I seem to have acquired ‘furniture disease’. My chest has fallen into my drawers.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:43 am
Waistline inching upward, year by year. Chest waders a-comin!
Fourscore
on April 28, 2022 at 6:31 am
There’s a difference between shame and embarrassment. I have neither but I do get cold easily so that’s a good reason to stay covered.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:34 am
*pictures 4×20 dressed like a babushka*
Tres Cool
on April 28, 2022 at 6:39 am
Tres Sr., at age 82 is perpetually cold. Unless he’s baking in full sun, he shivers like a chihuahua.
And the cheap bastard will wear a parka around the house rather than bump the thermostat up a few degrees.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:45 am
That’s all of us in a year or so. He probably grew up in privation that we Gen-xers have never known.
Fourscore
on April 28, 2022 at 6:48 am
He wants everyone to know he has a parka
Pope Jimbo
on April 28, 2022 at 7:47 am
Shame, embarrassment, cold. I suffer from none of those afflictions.
What bothers me is the rocks that my wife throws at my fat naked butt. That and her giggling.
Grosspatzer
on April 28, 2022 at 6:35 am
There is (was? It’s been a while) a nude beach just east of Robert Moses State Park on Fire Island. If you dig seeing dudes like this in all their splendor, that is the place to go.
Tres Cool
on April 28, 2022 at 6:37 am
“My wife and I were getting ready to mess around, but nuthin’ was happening. I asked her “you cant think of anyone else either?””
-R. Dangerfield
slumbrew
on April 28, 2022 at 6:40 am
Can confirm.
Lot 4? I think?
slumbrew
on April 28, 2022 at 6:43 am
East of Field 5, it looks like. It’s been a few decades.
rhywun
on April 28, 2022 at 6:43 am
There’s one at Sandy Hook (NJ), too.
pistoffnick
on April 28, 2022 at 7:41 am
Every beach is a nude beach if you are brave enough!
Cprm, that might be the best one yet! I watched it twice on Youtube just to nudge your numbers a little. Who is Gropey Joe snuffling in that background picture?
Wife, who normally handles the morning walks, is traveling for work. Dog don’t care, still wants out at 6.
I, of course, anticipated this and went to bed early.
Hah, j/k – still stayed up way too late. My own dumb fault.
Fourscore
on April 28, 2022 at 6:47 am
I had a dream last night, that my dog wanted to go outside. I woke up and remembered I don’t have a dog.
This is true, dream or hallucination, but it must be something they put in the Johnsonville brats. Skip those at dinner time.
Pope Jimbo
on April 28, 2022 at 7:43 am
it must be something they put in the Johnsonville brats. Skip those at dinner time.
“YOU NOT BOSS OF ME!!!”
— Screaming Tribe of Cannibals
Pope Jimbo
on April 28, 2022 at 7:44 am
All cannibals know that kids are tasty. Doesn’t really matter how well behaved – or not – they might be.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 7:58 am
More tender. Like veal, I guess.
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 6:50 am
I have good days and bad days. Note to self – don’t stop for a gut bomb before your shift ever again. Man I dragged ass last night and those stairs were a caution. The sooner I’m rid of this wretched job the better.
Sean
on April 28, 2022 at 6:54 am
The sooner I’m rid of this wretched job the better.
That’s the spirit!
?
Festus
on April 28, 2022 at 7:10 am
It scares me sometimes. Thanks, Friend!
Sean
on April 28, 2022 at 7:23 am
Lulz.
Apparently I won a holster on Gunbroker for $5 and change. Shipping was more than the item.
For the last several weeks, Americans across the country have struggled to access the new Covid-19 antiviral pill, Pfizer’s Paxlovid. Eligibility was flexible but largely reserved for people “at high risk for progression to severe COVID-19,” according to the Food and Drug Administration’s emergency use authorization standards.
That’s why public health experts were surprised last night when the vice president’s office revealed that the 57-year-old KAMALA HARRIS was taking the antiviral pill after she tested positive yesterday. Harris’ office said she is asymptomatic. And her office didn’t comment on whether she has any underlying health conditions that could make her more susceptible to a bad case of the disease.
“Why,” asked JONATHAN REINER, professor of medicine and surgery at George Washington University School of Medicine & Health Sciences, “would you give Paxlovid to someone without symptoms?”
——-
“I don’t think it’s unreasonable,” said CELINE GOUNDER, an infectious disease specialist and epidemiologist who’s also editor-at-large for public health at Kaiser Health News. She said the FDA’s reference to “high risk” for progression to severe disease in its Paxlovid fact sheet suggests a patient can be asymptomatic at time of diagnosis and still be eligible for the drug.
“We know that the way that presidents, or in this case vice presidents, are treated is not necessarily the way the average person is treated,” added Gounder, who advised the Biden transition on Covid-19. “It’s not just about what is best for that patient – it’s about what’s best for the nation.”
But medical ethicists argued that the moral rationalization for giving Harris the medication only underscores how unfair the system is.
Something something heartbeat away from the Presidency.
Also, medical ethicists should all be locked up in insane asylums, for the benefit of society.
Rebel Scum
on April 28, 2022 at 7:59 am
She’s A) more sickly than stated and/or B) still pushing the convid narrative.
rhywun
on April 28, 2022 at 8:05 am
She’s doing us a service by being a test guinea for that thing.
We’re not worthy.
R.J.
on April 28, 2022 at 8:17 am
I know, let her turn green and sprout tentacles first.
Brilliant. The voice is out of TOS Season 4
Awesome! Congratulations to you and your drug dealer.
Who is the girl in the picture?
I wondered who the girl is too. It was a slow reveal.
*standing ovation*
I loved it. Fantastic!
Pudding button LOL
also LOL
That had to be the easy one – it replaced the diet coke button.
What’s the other button?
Nukes
Pudding….Nukes….
hahaha. Good stuff, CPRM!
Oh, nukes, thanks, I couldn’t make it out.
Fantastic. Love the attempt at a narrow gaze.
Where’s Cornpop fit into all of this? If want to stop Putin, you gotta have a bad dude who runs a bunch of bad boys.
Hey Putin, I’m sending over Cornpop so you better stop it right now. He has a pool chain! Sh!!!!, he’s black, but he’s a smart one and doesn’t even speak with a negro accent if he tries and he cleans up real good.
Cornpop died in 2016.
Actually, I arranged his memorial service. It was very classy. Many people said it was the best memorial service ever. Really great.
Errybody talks about Cornpop, but you never hear a word about Cornmomma or Cornson or Corndaughter or even Corn-baby-momma.
They were probably bad dudes and duddettes, too.
That’s Cornyx to you. It’s 2022. Sheesh.
Children of the Cornpop? *shudder*
Huzzah! that was a great one,
Excellent work!
Outstanding CPRM, looks like the Hat/Hair are gonna have to step it up a notch, with the tough competition.
Nice shout out to SP. Thanks
https://archive.ph/ycZ3F/f05daffbd279b6af4d915ebb7132e8b45ee37999.webp
NSFW.
https://archive.ph/bHEGo/c4adada513a498658b16ef6fcefd8cbff75569d4.webp
NSFW.
https://archive.ph/dMYHM/35f63c65c8a46e86155ce01ef80422456e7e9989.webp
NSFW.
https://thumbs2.redgifs.com/WelloffSerpentineMice-mobile.mp4#t=0
NSFW.
Someone doesn’t understand how copyright works.
So…uhhhh…what do you guys want to talk about?
After you’ve been a couple with someone for 2 years, your flora is similar enough for analingus to be relatively low risk.
You know this from experience?
?
You know…the…uh…the thing.
How ’bout them Knicks?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ydrtF45-y-g
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZAQSoFMBsY
Some people have a lot of time on their hands.
Are related to Rufus?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dC1yHLp9bWA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HxUuDPNbkJk
I Don’t Wanna Talk, Baby, I Just Wanna Dance
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9nrEaHinGmY
I Don’t Wanna Talk About It
How You Broke My Heart
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcP8xLmTKmw
I Don’t Wanna Talk About It
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGg9zLIYurQ
Fuck you, MikeS., I LIKE Lesbian Folk
That was literally some of the worst music ever made.
I Don’t Wanna Talk About It
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdgcKB9X_N0
Fuck you, MikeS., I like reggae too.
I Feel Like You Are Talking in a Language I Don’t Speak
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EH9meoWmAOM
Talk To Ya Later
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-rEVVAw3-0
Let’s not.
Think it might rain?
Have You Ever Seen the Rain?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u1V8YRJnr4Q
Obvious follow up: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIPan-rEQJA
I love that song.
Love.
Obviouser Follow Up:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzFnYcIqj6I
I really like this downtempo cover of that song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYonYNt9VyU
Have you ever…
One of our liaison guys retired from the Air Force years ago. I was asked to give an address to his party at the NCO club. I couldn’t come up with anything so I went with this:
“You know, Butler and I have had some good times on road trips over the years. Like, there was this one time in Omaha. . . oh, I guess I shouldn’t tell that story here. But there was this time in Sacramento. . . well, I guess I need to skip that one, too. But this time in. . . In closing I want to wish Butler the best in his retirement and future plans. Good night.”
I then handed him his retirement card with an eightball of coke inside.
*adds The Bearded Hobbit to my retirement party list*
No shit.
Right?
L.O.L. I fucking love that movie.
It is a classic.
LOL!
You’ve outdone yourself. 10/10.
This. ⬆ ??
I kept waiting for the bunny to say This
L.O.L. I fucking love that movie.
The Easter Bunny running interference for the “Leader of the Free World” has got to have been a new low for the presidency.
I do like how the bunny head has a booming voice but no ability to make any more sense than Joe, since the voice must be a figure of his imagination. Kind of like the invisible friend Biden shook hands with at that press conference.
Figment, not figure, dammit.
Anyway, beautifully done CPRM!!
South Park did the Bunny,
Do advanced civilizations end in farce?
Donovan sang about Atlantis, so yes?
Ask Incitatus.
I guess one just has to look at it as a Comedy
His friend Harvey
Das war gut. Danke!
Bitte. I copied the cassette from my high-school German teacher.
In too local news, the Nye county commissioner seems to be a piece of shit. His wife doesn’t come off very well either.
https://www.reviewjournal.com/crime/prosecutors-to-review-battery-claims-against-nye-county-commissioner-2567386/
Short version is that he called the cops to report theft of $77,000 cash and a Glock, but when the cops got there she (name redacted but it’s obviously his wife) claimed he started choking her when he found that the money was missing.
The cops released hthe tape of the call. I still don’t know what the truth is, but I ain’t voting for that guy..
Yikes. Is that like a county executive?
Yeah, and Pahrump isn’t an incorporated city yet is the Nye country seat, so the real “power” here is at the county level.
On the plus side, that means our top cop, the sheriff, is an elective office, unlike a police chief.
But the county commissioner needs to GO. I’m glad Nye county district attorney tossed this case over the wall to another county (not Clark, which is Vegas) so there’s no apparent conflict of interest.
Stopped at a local workwear store today to pick up a shirt. Got to talking to the owner about clothing manufacturers and he went down a path of decrying offshoring to China and their use of prison and slave labor. Ok, I’m on board. And yet he prominently carries this stuff, which frankly I find a whole lot more troubling:
https://oce.oregon.gov/apparel/prison-blues.asp
Assuming it’s a voluntary program, I’m not seeing the issue. ??
I like the aims of the program, but the money making aspect of it becomes it’s own goal. All of the prison labor bothers me. It’s seen as a cheaper money saving option (or even requirement) but it crowds out true private sector alternatives and I question whether such programs can be truly voluntary. My feeling is they’re inherently coercive (vs non-participation options, favorable treatment for parole/probation decisions, etc) and the difference from Chinese prison labor is merely degree.
https://www.oregon.gov/das/OPM/Pages/inmate.aspx
Completely unrelated, it’s really pissing me off how many federal and state agencies are still using COVID to close their doors to the public.
Good points. Most of which I hadn’t considered. Government competing with private sector is enough for me to not like it.
Yeah, good point.
My off-the-cuff response is it seems better than learning how to be a better criminal.
*Inmate #5679876 nods in agreement while sewing a gram of meth into pants cuff.
Just think how that metal working training will help when making chivs
Thank you. I find Prison Blues disturbing as well. Their clothes are big in the logging industry.
*I’m a wanna-be lumberjack*
*I like to press wildflowers*
The shop had a large selection of Prison Blues, not so much Big Bill.
What they actually believe.
Well done CPRM!
I have to disagree. The individual Democrats believe that as long as they vote Democrat, that this magically makes them not racist. But in the victimhood games they play, other Democrats can full well be racists. It’s a competition of ever increasing pettiness and constantly shifting goalposts with the hoped for end result being to show that you are in fact the most virtuous…the most anti-racist that ever anti-racisted.
Anyone happen to catch “Survivor” on tv tonite? The race card was played, and everyone groveled.
I was watching. I was like, blah blah blah, can we get to a vote already? CBS has gone full woke with their casting.
I found this on Discus, too funny to not share,
“As a LGBQT+++ pan sexual, gender fluid, cis, transracial,hermaphrodite, LatinX that, today, identifies as a quad sexual pterodactyl I have to say that this filth (Matt Walsh) literally is a literal mortal literal threat to my literal mental health and literal physical well being…. Literally. This book is problematic in so many ways. I mean for Christ’s sakes I’m pregnant with a transgender centaur and I might lose they/them to the stress that’s triggering to me. I sure hope Amazon does the right thing and bans Matt Walsh from ever waxing his dolphin again…. I meant to say bans this book. I’m literally scared for my literal life because of this book. Hopefully Bezos can convene a Truth & Reconciliation Council one day and Matt Walsh can face the wrath of a someone who likes to take “inappropriate” showers with their daughter. If this menace Walsh is not stopped soon he’ll be writing about a creep that touches children to achieve sexual gratification for himself…. especially poolside with the kiddos rubbing his hairy legs. Anyways x x’s”
MLW’s reviews have taken a weird turn.
It’s a kids book FFS, haters gonna hate I guess,
That so much of that parody is based on fact is truly disturbing.
Excellent CPRM. For a moment I thought the rabbit was Brochettaward. Really liked the kind words for SP.
I would never say those words about another human being. It would be un-First like.
@KK: your wifi problem: https://youtu.be/t4QQTfIvzv4?t=820
https://youtu.be/O-ZhzFR7WRk
Bhad Barbie, the catcha outside girl, made $52 million on Only Fans. She did not provide even one First to the world. What am I Firsting for you cheap fucks for?
$20?
I’m proud to say I have no idea who she is.
She has her own language or something. The couple articles I skimmed with her somehow getting herself in the news were completely impenetrable to normal people.
Revealed truth is a harsh mistress.
Stop trying to monetize your destiny. It’s unseemly.
Do some weird sex shit in the process and maybe you’ll do better. Ever hear of sounding?
https://www.nj.com/advice/2022/04/dear-abby-widower-wonders-if-age-creates-boundary-for-intimacy.html
Old people sex. ?
Three unrelated words that are not coherent. Use that at a stand up routine at an old people’s home and you’ll have the audience laughing and/or in tears.
It’s still distant, but the reality of it seems to be approaching me.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/carlieporterfield/2022/04/27/rare-15-carat-blue-diamond-sells-for-575-million-barely-under-world-record/
Pretty. Not $57.5m pretty though
https://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2022/04/28/kenneth-frye-eric-pope-death-tabu-philadelphia/
Dead from a punch. It happens.
Ask Houdini
As anyone who watched Bloodsport knows…
https://billypenn.com/2022/03/30/philly-hottie-house-airbnb-siren-redd-oxford-circle-instagram/
“A stay at this cutie crib will currently run you around $167 per night — not counting cleaning fees”
How much do jizz moppers make an hour?
https://ktla.com/news/local-news/burglar-caught-on-camera-staring-at-sleeping-san-bernardino-couple/
O.o
Soo… they had security cameras… in the bedroom
Pervy or prescient? *shrug*
I know not everyone here is about having a dog, but one would have been handy at that moment.
Morning, people. Get yer asses up!
Time to get ready for work. *sigh*
https://youtu.be/diYAc7gB-0A
suh’ fam
whats goody
Lulz.
All three layers of New York State Courts found the congressional redistricting so egregious they thre it out. Mind you this isn’t the Pennsylvania situation, the judges are from the same party as the legislature, and still found against the map.
I haven’t followed the story closely, but I gather Ohio’s redistricting process has been a similar fiasco.
Wow, that’s huge. My critter was one of the ones targeted for elimination.
Attn: Yufus
https://www.insider.com/wisconsin-couple-died-from-electrocution-after-attempting-fractal-wood-burning-2022-4
(tho I have no doubts you know how to be safe around high voltage)
On topic: ‘Easter Bunny’ listed as prosecutor in hundreds of Iowa court cases
“In other news, E.S. Bunny Esq has filed a lawsuit against a court in Iowa…”
Good morning, homey, U, and Sean!
I have to take Little Black Cat in to the vet for a routine shot this afternoon. I hope he’s as well behaved as Big Sweet But Dumb Cat was. I also hope he’ll forgive me some day. ??
I’m sure you can manage to get the cat to forgive… eventually
Might take a lot of catnip.
Mornin’, GT. Watch out for claws.
Good morning, ‘patzie!
::examines recent scratches and puncture wounds::
Yup.
Didnt SNL do this bit already with “telegram” ?
Alligator found scratching at front door of Florida home
Aw, it’s just like a big old cold blooded dog. Let him on in.
“You’re that land shark”
“No ma’am. I’m just a dolphin”
Dolphins are assholes and the rapists of the sea. Don’t trust them.
Carl Hiaasen nailed it in “Native Tongue”, in which a villain meets his demise at the
handsfins of a dolphin channeling SEA SMITH. The villain screams “I’m being fucked to death by a fish!” Oh, and the dolphin is Dickie the Dolphin, a featured attraction at the theme park.I thought it was “Candygram”.
They used that one, too.
So much coke that they forgot that they’d already used the premise.
I think John Landis said that he actually budgeted in the cost of all the coke they were going through into Blues Brothers.
Plumber man
Flowers
I’m not sure how much sleep I got last night. I lay down at 5pm with the lights on. Next thing I know I’m looking at the clock going “Oh, it’s one in the afternoon” (It wasn’t) Then a bit later more coherently realizing it was 330 in the morning. But I still didn’t drag myself out of bed and turn off the lights until after my alarms said to get up and get ready for work.
Mother’s Day is coming.
WonderSpray
“Clean Yo Ass!” RIP Redd Foxx.
Also Redd: “You don’t just wash your whole ass; you wash your ass hole.”
I found it so fucking funny after watching his character on TV that his stand-up was so “blue”. Sagat, too.
Oh, I clearly remember Fred saying the ‘n-word’ on Prime Time TV.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHWdTjHHXy0
Aunt Esther was very, very blue as well. Extremely NSFW.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Dk9fcIs5dNE
God. Damn.
Mornin’, reprobates. Animated H&H goes well with morning Covfefe.
It goes well with a myriad of beverages.
Wrong.
Naturist Stuart, 85: ‘You’re never too old to be naked’
Technically, that is correct, it’s not so much the age but the wrinkling and sagging that goes along with it that’s the problem.
^ Body-Shamer.
You bet your ass I am.
If it’s any consolation, I’m ashamed of my body too. Age, gravity and entropy are not your friends.
I seem to have acquired ‘furniture disease’. My chest has fallen into my drawers.
Waistline inching upward, year by year. Chest waders a-comin!
There’s a difference between shame and embarrassment. I have neither but I do get cold easily so that’s a good reason to stay covered.
*pictures 4×20 dressed like a babushka*
Tres Sr., at age 82 is perpetually cold. Unless he’s baking in full sun, he shivers like a chihuahua.
And the cheap bastard will wear a parka around the house rather than bump the thermostat up a few degrees.
That’s all of us in a year or so. He probably grew up in privation that we Gen-xers have never known.
He wants everyone to know he has a parka
Shame, embarrassment, cold. I suffer from none of those afflictions.
What bothers me is the rocks that my wife throws at my fat naked butt. That and her giggling.
There is (was? It’s been a while) a nude beach just east of Robert Moses State Park on Fire Island. If you dig seeing dudes like this in all their splendor, that is the place to go.
“My wife and I were getting ready to mess around, but nuthin’ was happening. I asked her “you cant think of anyone else either?””
-R. Dangerfield
Can confirm.
Lot 4? I think?
East of Field 5, it looks like. It’s been a few decades.
There’s one at Sandy Hook (NJ), too.
Every beach is a nude beach if you are brave enough!
*gambols unimpeded*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtzoUu7w-YM
Cprm, that might be the best one yet! I watched it twice on Youtube just to nudge your numbers a little. Who is Gropey Joe snuffling in that background picture?
Daily Quordle 94
6️⃣3️⃣
4️⃣5️⃣
quordle.com
⬜⬜?⬜? ?⬜?⬜⬜
⬜?⬜⬜? ⬜?⬜⬜?
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⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?????
Rawr!
Nice!
Daily Quordle 94
8️⃣4️⃣
2️⃣5️⃣
quordle.com
⬜??⬜⬜ ⬜???⬜
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⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛ ?????
Daily Quordle 94
7️⃣4️⃣
3️⃣5️⃣
quordle.com
⬜⬜??⬜ ⬜???⬜
⬜⬜⬜?? ⬜⬜⬜??
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Top-left is asshoLe. Actually, all of them were.
Daily Quordle 94
?7️⃣
6️⃣8️⃣
No argument here.
Daily Quordle 94
?6️⃣
4️⃣5️⃣
quordle.com
⬜?⬜⬜⬜ ⬜??⬜⬜
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Excellent stuff, CPRM!
Morning, all.
The dog did not want to sleep in.
Doge has you trained.
Euphemism?
Sadly, no.
Wife, who normally handles the morning walks, is traveling for work. Dog don’t care, still wants out at 6.
I, of course, anticipated this and went to bed early.
Hah, j/k – still stayed up way too late. My own dumb fault.
I had a dream last night, that my dog wanted to go outside. I woke up and remembered I don’t have a dog.
This is true, dream or hallucination, but it must be something they put in the Johnsonville brats. Skip those at dinner time.
it must be something they put in the Johnsonville brats. Skip those at dinner time.
“YOU NOT BOSS OF ME!!!”
— Screaming Tribe of Cannibals
All cannibals know that kids are tasty. Doesn’t really matter how well behaved – or not – they might be.
More tender. Like veal, I guess.
I have good days and bad days. Note to self – don’t stop for a gut bomb before your shift ever again. Man I dragged ass last night and those stairs were a caution. The sooner I’m rid of this wretched job the better.
That’s the spirit!
?
It scares me sometimes. Thanks, Friend!
Lulz.
Apparently I won a holster on Gunbroker for $5 and change. Shipping was more than the item.
No friday mourning lynx?
It’s thursday, that’s why.
Darn.
🙂
https://www.reddit.com/r/interestingasfuck/comments/uddy2d/the_leaf_sheep_consumes_so_much_algae_that_the/
Leaf sheep.
Never heard of them before.
That’s cool. Daughter will love that.
More info: https://www.boredpanda.com/leaf-sheep-sea-slug-costasiella-kuroshimae/
whoa, that’s cool!
*looks around*
This is highly irregular.
Putin’s fault.
PUTIN!!!
At least it shut that loudmouthed Festus up for awhile.
We should demand a refund!
I’m cancelling my subscription!
Aftermath of the zoom?
What did I miss? Who Toobin’d?
It was a Threebin?
I was completely clothed within the field of view of my camera.
*flips table*
You should aim to get it to land upright after the flip.
In Putin’s Russia extra long table flips you!
TPTB must be busy getting their Waffle on.
#waffle97 2/5
?????
?⭐?⬜?
?????
?⬜?⭐?
?????
? streak: 12
? #waffleelite
wafflegame.net
#Worldle #97 1/6 (100%)
??????
https://worldle.teuteuf.fr
? Apr 28, 2022 ?
? 14 | Avg. Guesses: 7.07
?⬜???? = 6
#globle
I guess I have to go find some work to do. ?
Nah. New thread is up.
More equaler
For the last several weeks, Americans across the country have struggled to access the new Covid-19 antiviral pill, Pfizer’s Paxlovid. Eligibility was flexible but largely reserved for people “at high risk for progression to severe COVID-19,” according to the Food and Drug Administration’s emergency use authorization standards.
That’s why public health experts were surprised last night when the vice president’s office revealed that the 57-year-old KAMALA HARRIS was taking the antiviral pill after she tested positive yesterday. Harris’ office said she is asymptomatic. And her office didn’t comment on whether she has any underlying health conditions that could make her more susceptible to a bad case of the disease.
“Why,” asked JONATHAN REINER, professor of medicine and surgery at George Washington University School of Medicine & Health Sciences, “would you give Paxlovid to someone without symptoms?”
——-
“I don’t think it’s unreasonable,” said CELINE GOUNDER, an infectious disease specialist and epidemiologist who’s also editor-at-large for public health at Kaiser Health News. She said the FDA’s reference to “high risk” for progression to severe disease in its Paxlovid fact sheet suggests a patient can be asymptomatic at time of diagnosis and still be eligible for the drug.
“We know that the way that presidents, or in this case vice presidents, are treated is not necessarily the way the average person is treated,” added Gounder, who advised the Biden transition on Covid-19. “It’s not just about what is best for that patient – it’s about what’s best for the nation.”
But medical ethicists argued that the moral rationalization for giving Harris the medication only underscores how unfair the system is.
Something something heartbeat away from the Presidency.
Also, medical ethicists should all be locked up in insane asylums, for the benefit of society.
She’s A) more sickly than stated and/or B) still pushing the convid narrative.
She’s doing us a service by being a test guinea for that thing.
We’re not worthy.
I know, let her turn green and sprout tentacles first.