About The Author

CPRM

CPRM

Organic troll farmer.

96 Comments

  1. R.J.

    “Her Body, His Choice” should be a protest sign. Confuse everyone. Wonderful as always!

    • rhywun

      That got a LMAO out of me.

  2. Spudalicious

    Baron has an Oedipus complex towards Melania? I can’t condone it…

    • Count Potato

      I have an Oedipus complex towards Melania, and she’s not even related.

      • Chafed

        Same here. MILFS today. MILFS tomorrow. MILFS forever.

  3. DEG

    “Cogent point”

    Heh.

    Nicely done.

  4. Fourscore

    Good stuff, CPRM, as always.

    Planned Parenthood is kind of a misnomer anyway, more like unplanning.

    Looking at the current batch of politicians more women could and should have used ‘counseling’

  5. Count Potato

    *applause*

  6. Tundra

    Wonderful!

    Thanks, CPRM.

  7. Brochettaward

    I frequent a site called Profootballtalk.com. Run by a prog lawyer who, once upon a time, would leak stories that the regular media wouldn’t touch. Not often, but once in a while. Then he was bought out by NBC and his site exclusively serves as a news aggregator dressed up as a blog with shitty opinions thrown in.

    He likes his hot takes on gun violence lately.

    Maybe it finally has happened. Maybe we’ve finally reached the point at which we sufficient numbers of us cry, “Enough.”

    Really, enough. We all know it. Even the staunchest Second Amendment advocate knows it. Men and women of sound mind and goodwill have the right to keep and bear arms. There are ways to ensure that those who affirmatively would use weapons of war for their intended purposes cannot do so.

    Hopefully, we will soon strike a better balance between the right to liberty when it comes to guns with the right to life when it comes to not being shot by one. Hopefully, those boys and girls who died on Tuesday will not have died in vain.

    It’s all so cringy, I just can’t look away, though.

    Then the cunt goes and disables comments (note – I do not comment there, I wouldn’t First in their comment section if I was paid in gold and titties).

    • Urthona

      The whole “will not have died in vain” thing is just sick. Of course they did in vain.

      • Brochettaward

        That part stuck out to me the most, as well. It’s the definition of using the bodies as a soap box for your political views.

        Someone posted something from Michael Moore earlier where he openly called for getting rid of the second amendment. I say, hey, good. Let’s have the honest debate. That’s what the majority of the progs want. They can’t outright say it because they know it isn’t popular and because they know it’s going to get smacked down by the courts. So we get bullshit nonsense about “commonsense” gun regulations that never…ever…would have actually prevented the situations in question.

      • juris imprudent

        Martyrs for the cause! Even if conscripted to it post mortem.

      • This Machine

        Exactly, which is the MO of the progs since good ol’ Woodrow fuckin Wilson. Forget amendments – and later in the century, forget legislation – we should have a cadre of experts guide the nation with their expert expertise! Rule of law and the bicameral process to make legislation is too slow and cumbersome. Things get done so much faster when regulators regulate!

        I’d say we need a real life Bureau of Sabotage, but if history has proven out anything, it’s that communism is self-sabotaging and after a lot of misery we’ll have a Romanian Christmas and shake those tendrils off for good.

        Sorry for the rant. Shit’s been eating me up lately.

      • Fourscore

        Bureau of Sabotage= Biden Administration

      • rhywun

        Nah, BuSab exists to throw a wrench into the likes of the Biden administration.

        Jorj X. McKie is the f—–g hero we need right about now.

      • Chafed

        Is he related to Ibram X. Kendi?

      • Gustave Lytton

        Maybe when it starts out. Like all bureaucracy it will get taken over and eventually serve the apparatus to prevent threats to itself.

  8. MikeS

    DAILY QUORDLE ROUNDUP™©®
    (The ‘?‘ Edition)
    #121

    Champ
    Ozymandias 18

    Mojeaux 19
    Grosspatzer 20
    TARDis 21
    grrizzly 22
    Sean 22
    The Hyperbole 22
    trshmnstr the terrible 22
    Tulip 22
    whiz 22
    kinnath 23
    one true athena 23
    Grumbletarian 24
    Tundra 24
    MikeS 24
    Not Adahn 25
    Grummun 27
    Rat on a train 27
    Ted S. 28

    Chumps
    QuordleBot 117
    SDF-7 118

    Scrabble score: 42. Quordlemetrics: 0 0 5 7 (3). T-line split: 10/11. Average score: 31.9.

    I can’t think of anything funny to say today. Everyone, go hug somebody.

    • rhywun

      Disappointed in QuordleBot.

      • MikeS

        I celebrate every instance of AI failure.

      • Brochettaward

        One day, I will regale you with the tale of The Bro triumphing against The Firsting Bot.

      • rhywun

        *chuckle*

      • Not Adahn

        The Bro was a First-driving man.

      • trshmnstr the terrible

        QB struggled with the top left. I posted the first run, but I ran a few more and it chumped on top left a few times.

        There’s a weakness in the guess selector right now, and that word played to the weakness. I wrote an article about QB, including how I’m gonna fix it.

      • rhywun

        Before I lost interest, I coded a visual randomizer based on my current status – mostly as an exercise for SwiftUI. But nothing as sophisticated as ole QB.

        It helped a couple times.

    • whiz

      Regarding the Quordle Championship, since Sean and I tied, we play off tomorrow, and everyone else gets a day off. (Right Hyperbole?)

      • MikeS

        Correct.

  9. Fourscore

    Freedom or Security? Which of the two? Those residing in fully paid government environments are certainly not safe, prisons are dangerous places. Freedom comes with responsibilities.

    About 25 years ago I revisited my high school, first thing I noticed was the locked entry, the security camera and a buzzer. I told my friend that it was like a prison.
    One would think it was safe and secure but I’m sure criminal entry with nefarious plans would have been easy or like the kid in Florida, wait outside.

    • rhywun

      I Google-street-viewed my HS recently and was happy to see no barricades, at least. It’s one of those old-timey buildings (1910, I believe) with a zillion entrances but who knows what theater is in place now.

      But… of course… none of this matters. The design of the school is not the issue. The mental state of the children who pass through its doors is the issue, and that is where something is amiss. Here and there, in rare instances that one cannot “defend” against.

      • whiz

        Google street views can be old. I was just looking at one today that hasn’t been updated since 2018. What is now apparently a state DOT office (I need to renew my license) is just an empty storefront on the street view.

  10. MikeS

    I just left a swear in the comments under this video at YouTube and a pop-up asked me to please keep it civil. I said “fuck you” and clicked “post anyway”.

    • ron73440

      Attica!
      Attica!
      Attica!

    • MikeS

      OMG. YouTube aborted my comment. The funniest (stupidest) part is it was only a quote from the video.

      • UnCivilServant

        This is why you don’t log in to youtube.

  11. MikeS

    CPRM; keep ’em coming. Good stuff as usual.

  12. slumbrew

    Great work, CPRM

  13. Drake

    I thought Barron was a 7-foot tall supergenuis? Last time I saw him, he was towering over his giant parents.

    • rhywun

      Cazares wants answers as to why the first 911 call came at 11:32am, and yet Ramos was not shot dead until 1pm

      That seems fucked up, if accurate.

      • robodruid

        I have trouble squaring the right to independentness and the practical necessity of involuntary commitments. And then any facility would be a govt. funded facility.

      • rhywun

        Oh yeah, I’m not even diving into that thorny mess now.

        Just wondering why the fuzz didn’t seem to do what they are paid to.

      • Brochettaward

        They seem to be celebrating that they isolated him to that one classroom, where they left him all the time in the world to make sure everyone in it was dead.

        Armed school resource officer, as was the case in Florida, failed to do anything. He “engaged” the shooter, but did not, you know, fire his weapon. No reason is being given. If you can imagine, the best and bravest LE has to offer aren’t looking to be a school resource officers.

        They speak of someone being at the school days earlier to give training for a shooting incident. The husband of one of the teachers killed, in fact. So, presumably this town had a tactical team.

        It wasn’t until a special Border Patrol tactical unit showed up that they actually decided to act. One guy reportedly refused to wait for back-up and engaged. Was wounded himself.

        So, basically, it took a while to get someone with the stones to do what needed to be done on the scene. But the media doesn’t give a shit about that story because this is about gun control.

      • Mojeaux

        Most of them controlled their guns, all right.

      • MikeS

        Yeah, the “we isolated him and that akshully saved lies” bullshit raised my blood pressure. According to the Mail story, there were plenty of opportunities to take this fucker out. I guess getting home safe is more important than getting the public home safe.

      • robodruid

        Unbelievably sad
        Unbelievable enraging.

      • slumbrew

        The heroes got home safely, which is priority one.

      • Plinker762

        If the heroes sacrificed themselves, how would they be able to do heroic acts in the future?

  14. Gender Traitor

    I just noticed the sound of the surf and the seabirds in the background. Nice! It’s the fine details like that that set these videos apart. Well…in addition to the main characters being Trump’s hat and Trump’s hair. You don’t see a lot of that elsewhere on YT, AFAIK… or anywhere else for that matter…

    • CPRM

      That’s been there since the first episode where they were in Mar-A-Lago, Episode 37: Aftermath. Though I do tinker with the mix, and it was a bit more prominent in this episode.

  15. ron73440

    You are making a cogent point.

    What the fuck did you just say?

    Good one CPRM.

  16. Mojeaux

    9 x
    4 6

  17. Sean

    This is good. *Points to avatar*

    • Grosspatzer

      “Raritan and Flemington officers ordered the man to drop his sword, but he refused and ran toward an officer “in an aggressive manner,” police said in a statement.”

      When someone charges you with a sword, this is what you do:

      https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=kQKrmDLvijo

    • slumbrew

      “I love this doctor,” an amused Barker responded

      I bet.

  18. UnCivilServant

    Morning.

    I wish I had a good reason to not go to work today.

    • UnCivilServant

      Something inoccuous rather than severe.

    • Sean

      Mornin.

      • UnCivilServant

        How goes things in your neck of the woods?

      • Sean

        Road construction on my daily commute. Aside from the damaged tires and wheels, now it’s down to one lane in both directions.

        ???????

      • Sean

        The one lane bit is about 25% of the total drive.

        Anything fun in your woods?

      • UnCivilServant

        They finished redoing the sidewalk sorners outside my house. I haven’t gone further than the grocery store since last week.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, U, Sean, db, DEG, RoaT, & Yu!

      ::mentally searches for innocuous but plausible excuses to miss work::

      Cold? Sinus infection? As long as you avoid any symptoms that prompt higher-ups to demand you take a COVID test. My boss missed a couple of days of work this week from what he insisted was a cold. Said he took a couple of at-home tests that were negative for COVID. He came in for part of the day yesterday, croaking.

      I’m taking generic Airborne to try to keep from catching his cold just in time for the holiday weekend.

      • UnCivilServant

        I’m still under a “Vax or Test” mandate, so I’m getting an at home test every week at taxpayer expense anyway.

      • Gender Traitor

        Are you WFH or onsite today?

      • Gender Traitor

        In other too-local news today, I have a hair appointment! ?‍? Besides repairing the ravages of time on my hair, I get to leave work early to go get pampered! ?

      • UnCivilServant

        Have fun.

        I have trouble even getting a hair cut.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Ahh hair, I just colored mine in it’s OG shade of Red, the local hicks are freaking out, I love it.
        Pamper away GT!

      • Gender Traitor

        …then after I get home, I need to do the complete change-out of the cat litter. ???‍?

      • UnCivilServant

        ?

        The upside to not having pets is not having to clean up after them.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I hate the cat box chore, but Sophie is very particular about where she poops so it must be done.

      • db

        Good morning to you!

  19. db

    The “carve-out” pun…wow

    These just keep getting better.

  20. DEG

    Mornin’.

    Off to the gym. Kinda chilly here in NH this morning.

    • rhywun

      My heat just kicked on. I thought I was hearing things. 57 is not heat weather in my house.

  21. Rat on a train

    Daily Quordle 122
    7️⃣4️⃣
    6️⃣3️⃣

    • The Hyperbole

      5️⃣7️⃣
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    • Grosspatzer

      Daily Quordle 122
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      • Tulip

        Daily Quordle 122
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    • Not Adahn

      Daily Quordle 122
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      STEVE SMITH GET PART OF WORD GOOD! NOT EVEN ANGRY AT TR!

    • Sean

      Daily Quordle 122
      3️⃣8️⃣
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      Meh.

    • db

      3 8
      5 6

  22. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates.

    GT, you need an excuse to miss work? We just post on the slack(er) channel. “Not feeling well today”. Working for a woke outfit has its benefits.

    The youngest Patzer is home for the summer. He emerged from his cave at 2:30 PM yesterday, and I told him I thought that was a bit late, to which he replied that he had been awake for an hour. I figured I’d better not ask what he’d been doing for that hour.

    • rhywun

      Yeah, we don’t need an excuse. I have yet to use a “sick” day since I resumed at this outfit in 2020, even when I think I had the plague back around Xmas. Today would be ideal… but I don’t get all that many days yet so I save them.

      • Gender Traitor

        I’m very lucky that my employer has quite generous paid time off benefits (especially the longer you’re there, and I’m at 22 years.) I think I just maxed out on sick leave, and I have to watch that I don’t max out on Vacation.

  23. Festus

    Bravissimo!