Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell

by | Oct 6, 2022 | Film, Fun, GlibFlick | 130 comments

First things first – I called this the “Chinese Evil Dead” in last weeks’ movie comments.ย  Clearly it is the Japanese Evil Dead.ย  I cannot blame this racist mis-speak on IMDB, I can only blame it on my drunken blatherings. Forgive me, or don’t.ย  I’ll still keep stinking up Thursday nights.

Bloody Muscle Body Builder in Hell

Short Feature: The Beer Parade

The short this week is a very, very rare cartoon.ย  I thought of it because we just wrapped up Octoberfest, and this particular cartoon is about as celebration of beer post-prohibition*. Technically prohibition came back later in the form of the war on drugs. Things to note:ย  This cartoon is so rare, it had not been seen for 70 years prior to this shaky video.ย  The only video of it is this one, shot by some drunk with a cell phone**. Why is this so? Why is this so rare? Prohibition is shameful and should be taught as such to every school child.ย  This should be mandatory viewing for school kids. Discuss in the comments!

On to the movie! This film is amusing, the special effects verge on Halloween haunted house quality, and this is best viewed with a beverage. Look, this movie is great!ย  Hopping severed arms on strings, bloody zombies, the whole nine yards. I hope you enjoy!

So watch!ย  Or don’t!ย  Everything is voluntary!ย  Next week, I have some real gems from the 1980’s to choose from:

  • Mad Foxes: Hot rods! Nazi bikers! Vengeance!
  • Wheel of Fire: Mad Max apocalypse-style feature with now-vintage cars, surplus jeeps, ninjas and… womenfolk! With guns!

What are you in the mood for next week?ย  Let me know in the comments.

*I refuse to capitalize prohibition, that gives it some kind of importance, as if it was a good thing. If the lefties can play with the English language so can I.

**Not me. Some other drunk.

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(h/t: The Hyperbole)

About The Author

R.J.

R.J.

Hello. My name is R.J. I am a Tulpa with extra cheese and sour cream.

130 Comments

  1. Count Potato

    *hits play*

  2. Count Potato

    “On to the movie! This film is amusing, the special effects verge on Halloween haunted house quality, and this is best viewed with a beverage. Look, this movie is great! Hopping severed arms on strings, bloody zombies, the whole nine yards. I hope you enjoy!”

    No matter what, it can’t be worse than that pumpkin ale.

    • R.J.

      Oh itโ€™s pretty bizarre. And enjoyable. I am a tad ahead of everyone so I hit pause and watched the cartoon again.

  3. Ownbestenemy

    Thanks for the movie.

    • R.J.

      You are welcome! Enjoy!

  4. DEG

    **Not me. Some other drunk.

    Not me either. Watching the short…

    • R.J.

      Itโ€™s another Columbia short, with a libertarian approach to assholes who vandalize beer.

      • The Hyperbole

        Right up until the ‘free lunch’ wagon.

    • DEG

      That was trippy.

      • R.J.

        Cartoons werenโ€™t always for kids. There are a lot of adult ones shown with features in the 1930s, which were lost to time after the 1960s when cartoons increasingly were โ€œonly for kids.โ€
        Now get ready for a grainy horror film with lots of stabbing!

  5. R.J.

    General question:
    Who here has seen โ€œShakes the Clown?โ€

    • robc

      Is that the Bobcat movie? If so, I have.

    • Zwak. who's suit is as ragged as his nerves.

      You mean The Citizen Cane of Alcoholic Clown Movies? Every true cinema fan has seen that!

    • robc

      Budget: $1.4 million
      Box office: $114k

      • robc

        $115k, typo

      • R.J.

        Those are the only films I show. Box office failures.

      • R.J.

        Ok. I was judging whether or not to show it. Since so many have already seen it, I will hold off.

      • Count Potato

        That’s a criteria?

      • R.J.

        Sometimes. I can still play it – I was excited to see it available. Big tits zombie is still on the board too.

    • J. Frank Parnell

      Yep

  6. MikeS

    Loved the short. Good stuff. ๐Ÿป

  7. Ownbestenemy

    Nothing happened in Vegas again. Dude stabbed showgirls on the strip. My guess, dude thought he was in love with street performer

    • Chafed

      It must have happened. I heard about it on the news.

  8. R.J.

    At 35 minutes in, we have decapitation by shovel followed by dismemberment by hand axe.

    • whiz

      Spoiler alert, dude!

      (Actually, that makes me want to watch it, now that I busted out of the poker tournament.)

  9. rhywun

    *play*

    • rhywun

      *break*

      LOL our hero playing with his hair in the mirror

      • R.J.

        30 minutes in. You can make it.

      • rhywun

        Well, that was… something ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. Brochettaward

    I just have to say it. I have a lot of problems with you seconders. You don’t know how to drive – get the fuck out of the left lane. You reported my favorite Mexican restaurant for doing take out drinks. You vote in massive swarms which in our wonderful system of government cancels out The Firsters’ 1 million fold when there are no comparable number of seconders who should rank on the level of even the lowlights of Firsters.

    Your time is coming to an end. REPENT.

    • Brochettaward

      And MikeS? Fuck you!

    • Shiny Nerfherder

      I am the Tenther and I have come to decimate all Firsters.

    • Sean

      “You donโ€™t know how to drive โ€“ get the fuck out of the left lane.”

      Amen.

      I have literally yelled at these fucksticks “You’ll never be first!” And then passed them in the right hand lane.

      Sometimes fingers get thrown. I ain’t stoic.

      I hates them.

      • The Hyperbole

        And then passed them in the right hand lane

        I’ve never understood why this is an issue, especially since it only seem to be a problem for people when there are only two lanes, once you get to three or more lanes people pass on the right with no hesitation.

      • MikeS

        Ditto. This has always been a truly WTF with me? People also do it all the time on four lane city streets and never think twice. Just get in whatever lane is clear and go.

  11. DEG

    I’m heading out for the night. I’m about half-way through the movie. An early Japanese gore film? From that gore genre from many movies ago?

    Thanks RJ! I’ll finish the movie tomorrow.

    • R.J.

      Enjoy! It gets crazy about 30 minutes in.

  12. MikeS

    Who Firsted who? I Firsted you.
    Who Firsted who? Ain’t nobody told you?
    Who Firsted who? I Firsted you!
    I Firsted them and I Firsted you,
    Broโ€™ picks up the bill when I First you!
    Yeah!
    I Firsted you! Bro gets the screw!
    Yeah!

    • Brochettaward

      I am strongly beginning to suspect that you are just not a seconder, but the Anti-Firster spoken of in the the Firstonomicon.

      • R C Dean

        Firstonomicon

        Good one, Bro.

      • R.J.

        I still like Firsthalla.

      • MikeS

        โ˜๐Ÿป๐Ÿค˜๐Ÿป

      • R.J.

        He comes from the land of the ice and snow
        From the beer tap room where the firstings flow

        The hammer of the gods
        Will drive our tits to new land
        To fight the tards, seconders
        Firsthalla I am comiiiiingโ€ฆ.

      • MikeS

        Excellent!

        *starts head banging*

    • R.J.

      Technically, if you post that as an article, youโ€™ll be the first person to write and article about firsting.

      • Plinker762

        Now that would be hilarious, the “Firster” out firsted by a Firsting article .

    • Chafed

      ๐Ÿค˜๐Ÿค˜

  13. Yusef drives a Kia

    Smoking a bowl,
    The winds shakes my van,
    I relax,
    Cold descends upon us all,
    Bitch that it is,
    Basking on a hot rock….

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      In dreams of sunshine

      • MikeS

        and Firsting

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        I have had many firsts, Im good. How you doin’?

      • MikeS

        Doing good. Hoping to get some disc in this weekend. Been crazy busy. Still haven’t thrown my care package.

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        You must fix that,
        Cheers bro๐Ÿป

  14. Yusef drives a Kia

    People named John that annoy me,
    Overfilled purple donuts,
    Tunnels of color,
    Leading to a dump,

  15. Yusef drives a Kia

    The sky appeared,
    I viewed it,
    Black,

  16. Yusef drives a Kia

    The wind is wonderful,
    Trees break,
    Teslas are destroyed,
    Insurance,

  17. Yusef drives a Kia

    Fear not,
    The spaghetti monster still flies,
    Blessed Conformity,
    Or not,

  18. Yusef drives a Kia

    People think Im famous,
    Putrid looks famous,
    Maybe we are,

  19. Yusef drives a Kia

    When life fives you lemons,
    Make surfboards,

  20. Yusef drives a Kia

    Dont throw the baby out with the bathwater,
    Por que dos?

  21. The Hyperbole

    It’s like watching the Browns play themselves.

    • whiz

      Oh no, they’re going to overtime. Please doG let it end.

    • whiz

      Denver’s toast, there’s no way they can score even a FG in 5:50.

      • rhywun

        If a football game only happens on Amazon Prime, did it actually happen?

      • MikeS

        Ugh. Amazon does their absolute damndest to remind me that it did.

      • Chafed

        I need to thank them for freeing up Thursday night. I don’t have Prime and I’m not getting it. So, no problem skipping the game.

  22. MikeS

    Yesterday’s high was 73F. Tonight’s forecasted low is 21F. Saturday’s forecasted high is 62F. Fall is fun until the temp stops rebounding.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      High of 47 tomorrow, bye nice weather

  23. Count Potato

    That was good.

    Thanks, RJ ๐Ÿ™‚

  24. Yusef drives a Kia

    I never stop, if I do I may never start again,

  25. Tres Cool

    Im off to work, kids.
    Someone let Rufus know.

  26. Gustave Lytton

    Watching In the Line of Duty III. This is awesome.

    • one true athena

      I looked it up on imdb. oh my gosh the BABY Michelle Yeoh in the first movie in that series!

  27. Sean

    Mornin peeps.

    • UnCivilServant

      ๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค๐Ÿค

    • Rat on a train

      The clock is ticking. T-11 hours.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Itโ€™s genius, you get to turn yourself in without getting shot and if they miss it you just might get a job.

  28. Gender Traitor

    Good morning, Sean, Stinky, RoaT, and U! It’s Friday! And I get a three-day weekend! ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

    I intend to enjoy this one, Columbus Day is the holiday I fully expect to get cancelled ‘ere long by the woke mob. It’s either that or it’s renamed Indigenous Peoples Day or something. I can’t wait to see what we have to rename our state capital. ๐Ÿ™„

    • Rat on a train

      Indigenous Peoples Day Sale doesn’t have the same ring.

    • rhywun

      They keep trying to pull woke stuff around Columbus here but there’s too many of us of Italian extraction so it doesn’t go anywhere.

      • Rat on a train

        I admit I am not indigenous to Virginia but my children are.

      • Gender Traitor

        They don’t try to offer another Italian in return?

        Mussolini Day
        Gambino Day
        Cuomo Day

        I…got nuthin’.

      • UnCivilServant

        Caligula Day. It would play right into their core deviancy.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        July and August

      • Gender Traitor

        If the Federal Reserve is closed then, I’ll get the time off! ๐Ÿ˜

      • UnCivilServant

        Octavian shouldn’t get two Three months!

      • Rat on a train

        Mario and Luigi?

    • UnCivilServant

      It’s friday. I have to provide a list of what I actually do to the new management. Hopefully it’s not a prelude to being replaced, but asking for this sort of thing in writing is always a red flag. This is the same management that doesn’t tell us anything, provide context for the barks of ‘do this’ or ‘provide Y by x’, nor do they ask our input on anything.

      • Grosspatzer

        Oh, joy. I suppose “You are my manager, it’s your job to know what I do” is not an option.

      • UnCivilServant

        New management, came from a different unit. Both myself and my newest supervisor have only met him once ever in the three months he’s been here.

      • Gender Traitor

        I suspect (hope) it’s more of a sign that the new management has no clue what anyone in the department does nor how they do it but doesn’t dare admit their ignorance,

      • Fourscore

        “Do you work here? I’m from the government”

      • UnCivilServant

        “I invoke my fifth amendment right against self-incrimination”

      • Grosspatzer

        Self-incrimination is not an absolute right, the founding fathers did not anticipate the rise of insurrectionists armed with weapons not permitted by the second amendment.

      • UnCivilServant

        That’s because all weapons are permitted by the second amendment, you seditionist traitor!

      • UnCivilServant

        Well, I’ve gotten most of what I do down. After filing off the serial numbers it amounts to:

        Ticketing system
        Print Services
        LDAP
        Samba
        SFTP
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft
        PeopleSoft Adjacent
        PeopleSoft Adjacent
        SSL

        Paperwork
        Paperwork

        Supervision
        Supervision
        Supervision
        Paperwork
        Interviews
        Paperwork

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Iโ€™m waiting for Hernando Cortes day. Anyone who finished off the Aztec Empire canโ€™t be all bad. As for Columbus, in the context of the times he was pretty standard issue and not particularly brutal.

      • UnCivilServant

        But he didn’t respect the indiginous culture of… ripping out hearts to feed the gods, flaying prisoners of war and wearing their skins until they rot, murdering children to brin the rain, eating the boiled flesh of sacrificial victims… etcetera etcetera etcetera.

      • Rat on a train

        He also didn’t get vaxed and wear a mask.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Careful man, itโ€™s โ€œGods.โ€ You want the sun to come up tomorrow donโ€™t you?

  29. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates!

    One less renal calculus as 0f 9:30 AM yesterday. Yay! Still one more to go, but things are looking up.

    We too are off for “Indigenous People’s Day”. Too many syllables, holidays should roll off the tongue.

    • UnCivilServant

      It’s Columbus Day. Even New York State still calls it that, and they’re battling for Commifornias title of prog central.

      • Grosspatzer

        My management begs to differ. Also this past Wednesday was “Hispanic and Latinx Games Day”. I did not participate, but I wonder if “Hispanic or Latinx” was one of the game categories. Because they are totally different.

      • UnCivilServant

        Aren’t the Los Angeles Tinx a slow-pitch softball team?

    • Gender Traitor

      I, for one, am eternally grateful that I never had to take renal calculus to fulfill a math requirement.

  30. Fourscore

    Morning All

    And a great morning it is, wake up in the dark, get a fresh cup and sit in the quiet.

    • Grosspatzer

      Ah, yes. Not exactly quiet here, the boids are noisy, but all good.

      • UnCivilServant

        Speaking of boids,last night I found a sparrow-sized one had taken to roosting in one of my outside light fixtures. I took out the part that had turned into a droppings catcher (scaring off the boidy in the process), leaving less room to perch. I need to get the whole darn fixture replaced at some point.

      • Gender Traitor

        “Thoity doity poiple boids a-sittin’ on a coib, a-boipin’ an’ a-choipin’ an’ a-eatin’ doity woims!”

        I speak Joisey! ๐Ÿ˜Ž

      • UnCivilServant

        What the *cheep* did you just say?

      • Gender Traitor

        ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿผโ€โ™€๏ธ

      • Grosspatzer

        LOL

    • Grosspatzer

      Us old folks will be fine. We learned to duck and cover in second grade.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Meh, living through a nuclear armageddon is overrated anyway, what with the living envying the dead and all that.

      • UnCivilServant

        Envy the dead? HA! I will drag my tumor-riddled carcass through the glowing wastes and mock you for being ash.

      • Sean

        That’s the spirit!

    • Gender Traitor

      I think I’ll stick to Monopoly and Trivial Pursuit. Hell, I’ll stick to Candy Land to avoid that! ๐Ÿ˜ณ

      • R.J.

        Are you saying that Candy Land and vibrating butt plugs are mutually exclusive?

      • Rat on a train

        If you need help deciding your next move in Candy Land …

  31. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    yo whats goody

    • Fourscore

      A crisp fall mornin’, I started a fire in the wood furnace. Once the sun comes up it’ll stay warm all day.

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, homey! Hey, did you hear that the spiffy new(ish) food co-op on lower (in every sense except the crime rate) Salem Avenue can no longer accept WIC? In that “food desert” (Is the nearby Rally’s even still open?) that sure smells like the kiss of death to me!