1520 Main – Chapter 14

by | Jan 6, 2023 | Fiction, Prohibition | 116 comments

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13


PART I
SPEAKING IN TONGUES


14

THURSDAY AFTER SCHOOL, Trey and Gene were waiting for Marina and Dot in their booth at Kresge’s. Marina had said nothing to Dot about Gene’s feelings for her, but Dot was noticeably more peppy all day and less inclined to flirt with anybody not named Gene. She wasn’t flirting with Gene, either. Marina couldn’t tell if Dot was in love with Gene or not, but she sure was happy to see him and the fact that she didn’t notice his change in demeanor was telling.

“Hello, boys,” Dot said gaily as she stood at the table waiting for Gene to slip out of the booth and allow her in.

“Ladies,” Trey and Gene said at the same time.

“Hi,” Marina said softly as she slid into the booth Trey had vacated and patted the seat.

“Hi yourself,” he returned just as softly.

Dot and Gene were paying no attention whatsoever after Gene asked how her day had gone and he listened attentively. It might have seemed like an act, but Dot could make a study hall of one sound like a grand adventure.

“How’s your hand?” Marina asked Trey. “You aren’t wearing a bandage anymore.”

“Better,” Trey said, holding it up and flexing it, albeit slowly and with a grimace. “More aspirin, I suppose.”

“How was your day?”

“You have good days and bad ones. Had to pay out on a policy today.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Was it a lot of money?”

“I don’t care about the money. A family was put out of their house and their baby died. There is no amount of money in the world that can make up for that.”

Marina clapped her hands to her mouth, horrified. “Oh my. Oh, goodness gracious.”

He nodded soberly. “That is the worst part of my job, watching people’s lives get wiped out. Could be anything. Their pipes could burst and flood their house. All their whatnots and pictures and memories, gone. Robberies. That’s usually just stuff, but having someone break into your house disturbs your peace. You can’t replace that, either.”

His sorrow was real and deep, and Marina felt it. Gathering all the courage she could, she reached out and took his hand. He wrapped his other one around hers and gave it a little squeeze and a smile. “Thank you.” He paused, then said, “You’re a good woman, Marina.”

It was said so sincerely, she swallowed her hurt and pain and envy at the compliment. “Thank you,” she murmured.

His brow wrinkled. “Was that … wrong? I meant it, I truly did.”

She smiled. “I know you did. Thank you. I appreciate it.”

“Please don’t fib,” he said lightly. “Tell me why that upset you.”

Marina bit her lip and again had to swallow but now because she couldn’t seem to speak. She didn’t want to tell him but he was too perceptive and persistent. They’d been meeting every day for a little over a week but the fact that he knew she was distressed made it seem like they knew each other far better than their short acquaintance would indicate.

“Hey, why don’t we head outside?”

The day was warm when they emerged. Trey put on his fedora after Marina positioned her wide-brimmed sun hat on her head. They turned right and headed to Petticoat Lane. He didn’t take her hand, which disappointed her a little and he kept a respectable distance between them.

“Why did that upset you?” he asked again.

“Anybody can be a good woman,” she blurted.

They strolled for a while without speaking. Then he said, “Would interesting be better?”

She bit her lip. “Not much.”

“What would be?”

“Pretty,” she whispered.

“You’re not,” he said flatly, and she gasped, her head snapping up. He looked at her steadily and said, “I don’t like pretty girls.”

Marina blinked because that didn’t make sense.

“‘Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.’”

Marina was thoroughly confused.

“Tolstoy. Anna Karenina. That was a metaphor. Pretty girls are all alike; every interesting girl is interesting in her own way.”

Marina had so many feelings and thoughts and questions she didn’t know which one to pick first. “What’s the difference between a simile and a metaphor?”

Trey stopped cold, blinked at her, his mouth partially open, then laughed, stuck his injured hand in his pocket, and rubbed his chin with his other hand. “The second I think I understand you, you surprise me.” He looked back at her with a grin, then he waggled his finger at her. “That’s what I mean, Marina. How’s this. I could look at you all day long and listen to you talk because you say the most unexpected things.”

Marina was hopelessly lost and now felt like a sap. She gulped, knowing her face was completely scrunched up. “I … ”

He leaned toward her, still grinning. “I could look at you all day long,” he repeated. “Better?”

His words seeped into her mind, but they seemed to float there. “Um … yes? I … don’t … ”

He waggled his eyebrows.

“I don’t believe you.”

His smile vanished. “What do you mean, you don’t believe me? You think I’m acting?”

Her brow wrinkled. “White lies,” she murmured, looking downward. “To make me feel better.”

“If I didn’t like you, I wouldn’t bother trying to making you feel better. Trust me, doll, I don’t give out compliments.”

“Nobody thinks I’m smart,” she said flatly.

“You don’t think the way everybody else does,” he insisted.

Marina shook her head slightly.

“Say … you’re a frog with a bunch of others. You all want to get across a pond. It’ll be easy because there are a whole lot of lily pads. But you’re stronger than your friends so you jump over a whole lot of lily pads and get to the other side of the pond a whole lot sooner. You don’t even notice there are any lily pads between you and the one you want to get to.”

She blinked. She might not like being compared to a frog but she sure liked hearing she was the strongest one of a group and didn’t need all those lily pads. “So I’m … efficient?”

His face lit up. His eyes sparkled. “Yes! And it takes a very smart person to be that efficient. The trick is to trust your efficiency. You don’t.”

Marina was watching him with eyes wide, all the words he said making no sense because she had always been homely and, at best, an average student. She wanted to believe him. She believed he was sincere. But if he was, he was simply the oddest person she had ever met.

“I’m telling you why your marks don’t make you stupid and standing next to your pretty friend doesn’t make you homely.”

That was a new way of looking at it. Marina thought. “Comparison.”

“Yes,” Trey drawled, sounding very pleased. “The difference between a simile and a metaphor is the word ‘like.’ I didn’t say happy families were like pretty girls. I said they were pretty girls.”

Marina’s mouth opened wider and she began to smile. No, she couldn’t have stopped it if she tried, and launched herself at Trey. She didn’t care she was being too forward. She didn’t care she was not being a proper girl.

She pushed herself away from him and clasped her hands in front of her chest. “Thank you! You make everything so clear!”

He drew back in surprise. “All that for an English lesson in three sentences?”

“Yes!” she laughed. “Simile, similar, like.”

His expression opened up even more. “And you know what else? I’ll bet you’ll be crackerjack at geometry.”

She waved a hand. “Geometry was a cinch.”

He scowled. “You say that like it’s nothing.”

Confused, she said, “It is. Like home ec. Like looking at a picture of a dress and knowing how to make it. Or like reading a recipe and knowing what it’ll taste like.”

He blinked. “You can do that?”

She nodded and shrugged helplessly. “It’s just … something I do.”

“Do you … cook? At home, I mean.”

“Once in a blue moon. Mother doesn’t like my food. She thinks I use too many spices.”

His eyebrow rose. “I bet you’re plenty spicy.”

She nodded. “Father likes it but Mother insists. I do the baking.”

He pursed his lips. “I see.”

“I … know what you’re thinking,” she said with quite a bit of guilt, but she had to get it out to someone. “Mother doesn’t cook very well.”

His mouth twitched a little, but he said nothing.

“Sometimes I think maybe she does it on purpose so I won’t eat too much,” she blurted, adding embarrassment to guilt. “I have to watch my waist.”

“I can watch it for you,” he said gravely, which made her look at him suspiciously. “It was a joke, doll,” he said dryly. “My way of saying I think it’s fine the way it is.”

“What’s that called?” she asked, still warily. “Not a joke. Not sarcasm or a pun. It’s something else.”

His mouth twitched. “A double entendre.”

Her brow wrinkled.

“Means two things, but you have to be in the know to understand the second meaning. But since you’re not in the know, I’m not going to explain it. I am very impressed you understood there was more, though.”

“Double IN-tin-der,” she repeated carefully.

“Yes. How’d you pick it up?”

“It was in your voice.” She paused. “Are you … Did you go to college?”

“Oh no,” he said gravely. “I didn’t even finish sixth grade.”

Stunned, she blurted, “How do you know so much?”

“I told you. I read a lot. If I don’t understand something, like algebra, I hire a tutor. Most everything else I got from books.”

“Do you want to go to college?”

He hesitated. “Don’t need to,” he said gruffly. Marina said nothing because he seemed to be … sad. But just when the silence between them became unbearable, Trey murmured, “I’m sorry. I, um … I’m a little sentimental right now because of that family I told you about. I wanted to tell you what I think about you because you never know when—”

Marina’s eyes began to sting, which almost never happened, but the connection between the family who had lost their baby to a fire and never being able to talk to a loved one again was …

I would just like to enjoy having a beau for a little while.

They turned the corner onto Walnut. “Are you going somewhere?” she asked quietly, finally looking back at him. “Not interested in me anymore?”

“No!” he said, clearly shocked.

“Because if you get tired of me, I’d appreciate it if you say so and not just hint around or disappear.”

He stopped cold and stared at her for a few seconds, but she didn’t drop her gaze. “Marina,” he said finally, “my mother and three older brothers died in the epidemic.” She gasped. “One morning they were there and working, happy and healthy. A week later, they were dead. My father died a year later from a broken heart. Then it was just me.”

“Oh, my goodness gracious,” she breathed. “I am so sorry, I—”

“I was twelve when my father died, which is why I didn’t get past the sixth grade. I had to survive. So I know a little about things happening quickly and you never get to tell someone how you feel. How I feel about you is, I think you’re the bee’s knees. No matter what happens between us, I will always think that.”

Marina shifted her attention to the tip of his nose. It wasn’t a promise never to leave but …

I would just like to enjoy having a beau for a little while.

A little while. It would be best not to get too attached. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Thank you. I appreciate it.”

“And thank you for telling me.” It was all she could manage to say without blurting that what she really meant was And I’d appreciate it if you proposed to me right now and married me tomorrow.

Because what would it be like, she thought as they continued around the block in surprisingly comfortable silence, to live with someone who could look at her all day long and thought she was smart and that she was the bee’s knees and told her that without any embarrassment at all?

• • •

What would it be like, Trey thought darkly as he lay on his divan and listened to the sounds of a city waking up as he was falling asleep, to know a girl so smart and sweet and intriguing, so heartbreakingly sad, to want her, to hold her and kiss her and make love to her until she was happy, and not be making plans to pull the rug out from under her?

14


If you don’t want to wait 2 years to get to the end, you can buy it here.

Speakeasy staff.

About The Author

Mojeaux

Mojeaux

Aspiring odalisque.

116 Comments

  1. Brochettaward

    Let’s get this First started.

  2. juris imprudent

    Poor Trey, doesn’t really have the soul of a mobster.

    • Mojeaux

      No, he does not.

  3. R.J.

    I just got my copy of 1520 Main on Amazon. The wife ran off with it.

    • Mojeaux

      The wife ran off with it.

      AWESOME.

      BLOSSOM.

      • DEG

        🙂

    • DEG

      RJ, I finally finished last night’s GlibFlick. The shakeycam got to me, but it was a good little flick. Thanks!

      • rhywun

        Yeah I don’t like shakeycam much but I thought it was really well done here.

      • rhywun

        I was reminded of Cloverfield which I liked more than I expected and I only saw recently because I expected much less.

    • Rebel Scum

      They intend to turn this farce into a national holiday.

      ‘We, the people, prevailed’ — Pres. Biden marked the 2-year anniversary of January 6 by granting the Presidential Citizens Medal to 12 law enforcement officers, election workers, and officials who contributed to saving U.S. democracy

      This dishonest horseshit makes my blood boil like you wouldn’t believe.

      • Brochettaward

        Let them try to turn it into a day of remembrance and watch how quickly it becomes coopted.

        I’d love to see a bunch of Trump supporting deplorables descend on Washington DC every 1/6 for beers. A convention of deplorables just as an annual remind to those shitbags.

      • The Hyperbole

        A reminder that a bunch of gullible larpers made a half-assed attempt at ‘saving the republic’ ?

      • Gustave Lytton

        I look forward to reading “Hyperbole’s Reevaluation of the Founding Fathers” next Tuesday evening.

      • Brochettaward

        Yes. You say that as if it’s a big joke when the reality is that if those people had a fraction of the ill-intent prescribed to them they could have wiped out quite a few congress critters.

      • Ownbestenemy

        Was there even an attempt?

      • rhywun

        They arrested Ashli Babbit’s mother in DC today. I dunno what she did beyond “being a nuisance” but it smells like vindictive bullshit to me. Thus, entirely within character for this administration.

      • rhywun

        Oh. Read more down.

      • The Hyperbole

        Sounds like she got herself arrested on purpose.

      • rhywun

        A time-tested tactic, I guess.

      • Brochettaward

        Sounds more like law enforcement suddenly decided they were going to enforce laws against peaceful protesters to me. You could forgive someone for not realizing they aren’t supposed to protest in the streets without a permit.

        I’d love to hear an actual rational for arresting her and claiming that it isn’t viewpoint discrimination when they let BLM do as they pleased for years.

      • The Hyperbole

        Because she turned around extend her arms for the cuffs and offered herself up for arrest, while the BLM types ran and fought?

      • Brochettaward

        How often were BLM/antifa told they had to get out of the middle of the street when marching/blocking the road? When were they told they couldn’t protest because they didn’t have a permit?

        We’re back into “disingenuous cunt” territory with you.

      • Brochettaward

        Do you want me to go find links to the multitudes of stories where they blocked traffic and weren’t arrested?

        https://www.fox5dc.com/news/black-lives-matter-protesters-block-dc-streets

        sources told FOX 5 that officers on scene called the police chief asking for permission to make arrests, but she gave orders for officers to stand down and not make any arrests.

        You claimed she was intentionally trying to get arrested. No, she simply did what a number of “peaceful” protesters had done in recent years and because she was guilty of wrong think, they had no problem arresting her. The mayor DC won’t be naming any streets after her or her daughter.

      • The Hyperbole

        Of course she wanted to be arrested. Every ‘peaceful protestors’ goal should be to get arrested. That’s how you make the news and garner support without being an asshole.

    • juris imprudent

      Oh I understand the international repercussions – everyone in DC was exposed as cowardly and stupid. Thank god the rest of the world caught on to what a lot of us in this country know!

  4. Rebel Scum

    She should have identified as Antifa/BLM.

    The group did not have a permit to demonstrate on Capitol Grounds. Officers established a clear police line to prevent the group from moving further west on Independence Avenue, SW. The officers and officials told the group to get out of the road or the group would be arrested. The sidewalk was open. A woman in the group was given multiple warnings to get out of the road. Instead of getting out of the road, the woman refused to leave, turned around with her hands behind her back, and asked to be arrested.

    Around 1:45 p.m., the woman was arrested for two Capitol Traffic Regulations – §16.3.20 Obey An Order, as well as §16.3.40 Blocking And Obstructing Roadways. The person was identified as 58 year old Micki Witthoeft.

    As is typical for this charge, Ms. Witthoeft was processed and released this afternoon after being given a citation to appear in court at a later date.

    • creech

      “She should have identified as Antifa/BLM.”
      You bet! In Philly, the BLM mob starting spilling on to an active expressway. Cops used tear gas to restrain them. Eventually, several cops were dismissed from the police force for use of “excessive force” and the City paid compensation to those whose eyes were watering.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Psssst, it’s deliberate.

      • Chafed

        Oh yeah. It’s deliberate.

      • The Last American Hero

        +1 street czar

      • Chafed

        Are you Creosote Achilles.

    • Ownbestenemy

      Permit to demonstrate…..

      Oh…obstructing roadways is a thing again. If applications of laws were equal, I would say she deserved it.

  5. rhywun

    “I bet you’re plenty spicy.”

    Multiple-meaning LOL

  6. Fourscore

    Thanks Mojeaux,

    I don’t know how much is Trey’s BS and how much is fact. I’m sure getting the feeling that he’d wished he hadn’t lied so much at the beginning and is having thoughts that aren’t reconciled with the original plan.

    What guy hasn’t told a few imperfections trying to impress a girl at a bar, sometimes it works but leads into difficulties later.

    Marina/Trey, don’t fall in love with a dreamer

    • Mojeaux

      Heh. As Trey says, “A good lie is short on details. The best lie is the one a cat tells himself.”

    • rhywun

      I won’t pretend to read Mojo’s mind this soon in but it IS a romance 🙂

      • Mojeaux

        And everybody knows where a romance ends up! (Which is, you know, kinda the point of the genre designation.)

      • Ted S.

        If they’re kinky, it’s someplace other than bed.

  7. rhywun

    Thx for linking the pics again. It helps.

    • Mojeaux

      Oh, you’re welcome! I try to keep my website updated, but most of the time I forget I have one. LOL

  8. Brochettaward

    Yet another NFL rant.

    NFL owners officially voted to change their own rules about cancelled games. It’s all a jumbled, confusing mess. The only conceivable explanation I can come up with for developing this big convoluted scenario is to create artificial drama. Neutral site games and coin flips (which I’d wager will be televised somehow) to determine home field in other instances…this is all a joke.

    They had a simple and relatively fair scenario for a cancelled game. It was simple and straight forward. Anyone could understand it. No one can understand what or why they’re doing what they’re doing right now besides to drum up interest. Taking what was treated as some sort of national tragedy (christ, didn’t even cancel games after 9/11) and using it to create drama to attract eyeballs. Can anyone decipher this explanation for the rule change?

    Falcons CEO and Competition Committee chairperson Rich McKay addressed the decision to change the rules on the fly, and the move to not follow the rules as already written.

    “I would say it’s not necessarily that they weren’t followed,” McKay said, “it was that you had a circumstance, it wasn’t necessarily captured — we don’t capture everything in every rule and every policy manual and sometimes when you face situations you have to try to make adjustments, and this was one of those adjustments. Not a lot different than in COVID when we were trying to get — to make sure we got to [256 games] and we had to do a lot of schedule manipulation, and some teams that were affected were not obviously happy with it. But that was done in the best interest of all 32, and that really was the focus of this, is what’s in the best interests of all 32? And that’s why this was voted on, and then voted on prior to this week’s game, so that all teams would know.”

    I sure as fuck have no clue what he’s trying to say. How did using winning percentage for the effect teams not work?

      • rhywun

        The whole point of sports is to give people something frivolous to look at, away from the real world. “This wasn’t the time to play football” says, “You must wallow in this other thing that we direct you to.”

      • Gustave Lytton

        I remember when things shut down after 9/11. It was driven largely by public opinion imo. I was firmly in the get back to normal, eff them and I remember Bush getting flack for saying essentially that.

      • Chafed

        Me too. The Brits and the Israelis know how to handle this stuff. Cry, dust yourself off, and go on.

      • rhywun

        The American upper lip is a flaccid noodle.

      • Ted S.

        The Brits did until that idiot Diana Spencer got drunk and didn’t put on her seat belt.

      • Toxteth O'Grady

        (I heard her seat belt wasn’t working. Also that she often eschewed them to evade the paps faster.)

      • Ted S.

        I wouldn’t be surprised if her last words were trying to get the driver to go faster.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      The NFL hates its own fans.

  9. KK the Porcine Pearl-Eater

    On board flight home. Anyone gonna still be on Zoom at 12:30am ET?

    • Ownbestenemy

      Maybe

    • DEG

      I won’t be on Zoom at all tonight. Maybe tomorrow night.

      Sorry about your friend.

  10. DEG

    “Pretty,” she whispered.

    “You’re not,” he said flatly, and she gasped, her head snapping up. He looked at her steadily and said, “I don’t like pretty girls.”

    Except she is pretty

    “‘Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.’”

    Tolstoy. Nice.

    Trey stopped cold, blinked at her, his mouth partially open, then laughed, stuck his injured hand in his pocket, and rubbed his chin with his other hand. “The second I think I understand you, you surprise me.” He looked back at her with a grin, then he waggled his finger at her. “That’s what I mean, Marina. How’s this. I could look at you all day long and listen to you talk because you say the most unexpected things.”

    Is he getting feelings for her? Yes. Yes I think he is.

    “I told you. I read a lot. If I don’t understand something, like algebra, I hire a tutor. Most everything else I got from books.”

    Minus the tutor, Eric Hoffer if he was a gangster instead of a longshoreman.

    “I was twelve when my father died, which is why I didn’t get past the sixth grade. I had to survive. So I know a little about things happening quickly and you never get to tell someone how you feel. How I feel about you is, I think you’re the bee’s knees. No matter what happens between us, I will always think that.”

    Pulling the rug out from under her is going to suck.

    • Mojeaux

      I am so glad you’re enjoying this. 🙂

      • DEG

        🙂

        It’s good.

    • Mojeaux

      Except she is pretty

      And, yeah, that becomes a tidge of a problem later on.

    • rhywun

      I like Gio’s idea that she becomes his moll.

      We shall see!

  11. LCDR_Fish

    RJ, saw your Private SNAFU post from last night a little late.

    Some of the episodes are remastered on the Golden/Platinum Looney Tunes collections, but if you can find this disc, it’s definitely worth it: https://www.amazon.com/Private-Snafu-Golden-Classics-Blu-ray/dp/B018611N1E/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3CGF9JLX0VL2J&keywords=private+snafu&qid=1673062455&sprefix=private+s%2Caps%2C757&sr=8-1

    Also, for one of the discussions earlier today, I’ve gotten great use out of some of the leather gloves from these folks – for using with my phone touchscreen.

    https://www.amazon.com/stores/Gloves+online/page/C406459F-2114-4AF1-A9EE-4DA9DC91A4C4?ref_=ast_bln

  12. rhywun

    I knew Hakeem Jeffries was a moronic clown but holy crap he is an asshole too.

    Dude gasbags for half an hour and every word of what he claims his party stands for is a bald-faced lie.

    • rhywun

      I don’t think I can stomach a half hour of McCarthy doing the same thing.

      • Lackadaisical

        Why are you torturing yourself?

  13. Gustave Lytton

    White smoke from the capitol.

  14. rhywun

    LOL “journalism“, ladies and gentlemen.

    Santos made the gesture in the very room where nearly exactly two years earlier a swarm of Trump supporters, many white supremacists, stormed inside.

    Harvard Law School’s Cyberlaw Clinic instructor Alejandra Caraballo took to Twitter to point out his use of the symbol.

    “The guy who lied about everything turns out to be a white supremacist who flashed a white power hand gesture on the house floor,” she wrote.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      OFFS, the 4chan troll that won’t die.

    • Sean

      That’s hysterical

  15. Sean

    Morning Glibs.

  16. Sean

    15th time does the trick. 😞

    It was fun while it lasted.

    • Lackadaisical

      ?

      Morning.

      • Sean

        McCarthy is in.

      • Lackadaisical

        Ah. That was a forgone conclusion, though I’m a little surprised the GOPe didn’t put someone else up as a replacement.

        Did the holdouts at least get the concessions they wanted?

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        They got them. We’ll see if they can keep them.

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Whatever..

      We’re at a stage where the CIA doesn’t seem to really mind if we think they killed a sitting popular President, the FBI has gone completely political, State is given free reign to light the world on fire, the health agencies are actively trying to kill you, and the DOD is funded to the tune of a trillion dollars a year.

      The clown show in Congress isn’t going to change much. Wake me when they attempt to defund even one of those agencies.

  17. Lackadaisical

    Going to dive back into working out after a little hiatus for new years.

    And a tee time with the son, plus looking at pond kits today. Should be a fun day.

    • Lackadaisical

      Due to his severe case of sexlexia?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      “It’s going to come down to public opinion now, and public opinion has looked at Ron like a god,”

      Yeah, sure. I saw the guy back around 2000 in LA at a hotel event. He looked like a broken homeless dude back then and his posse looked positively heroin-chic.

    • Sean

      *owned

      • hayeksplosives

        I’ve heard it both ways.

        —Shawn Spencer

      • Sean

        💟

    • Trigger Hippie

      Even the brick and mortar retail stores are turning white supremacist slavers now? Is there nothing Trump can’t ruin?!

      Also, phrasing?

      Good morning. Sorry for the bad joke. Been up since three and am about to try giving sleep one last go before the sun rises. Enjoy your day, sir.

      • hayeksplosives

        Nighty night. Same boat. Freaking insomnia.

    • hayeksplosives

      How is this supposed to improve/eliminate racism?? It emphasizes RACE uber alles.

      Oh, wait; it’s not meant to eliminate racism; it’s meant to line the pockets of the Social Justice brigade.

      • Sean

        “One of the other books that he sold is ‘Africa Is Not a Country,” Blake said. “He used to tell us that all that time because so many people think Africa is a country and it’s a continent.”

        I mean…wow…maybe they should have left that out.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Philadelphia public education

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        They’d love a race war, or they at least think they would.

    • Grosspatzer

      It’s been slowly disappearing for a long time. Lake Bonneville, anybody?

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      I was outside last night when a starling flock flew over.

      Let’s just say I needed to wash my hair afterwards.

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        If only it had been meth or cocaine.

    • Grosspatzer

      Quinn the Eskimo is in a Canadian prison?

      • Shirley Knott

        Nice reference 🙂

      • Tres Cool

        You’ll not see nuthin like the mighty Quinn

      • Shirley Knott

        But when Quinn the Eskimo gets here everybody gonna want to doze.

  18. Tres Cool

    suh’ fam
    whats goody yo

    • Scruffy Nerfherder

      Coke pigeons

    • Sean

      ‘Sup?

  19. Grosspatzer

    Mornin’, reprobates!

    • Gender Traitor

      Good morning, ‘patzie, Scruffy, homey, Sean, hayek, TH (if you’re still awake,) and Lack!

      Survived week 1 of Hell Month at work – so far so good! ::knocks wood:: A weekend with no obligations sounds like heaven to me! ::raises mug::

      • Sean

      • Grosspatzer

        Skoal! Congrats on surviving; does Hell Month involve hazing? /recovering frat boy.

      • Sean

        Still recovering? Must have been quite the ordeal.

      • Grosspatzer

        Lots of cold pizza and shitty beer.

      • Gender Traitor

        Not unless there really is someone who, behind my back, is urging coworkers, “Call GT and ask her a stupid question about something that’s completely outside her area of responsibility. See if she finally snaps!:

      • Scruffy Nerfherder

        Mornin.

        I’m going in to work today to continue the effort. At least I can crank the music with nobody around. It does help with the more monotonous tasks.

      • Gender Traitor

        Hope you don’t make any more unpleasant discoveries and can just get everything back in good order!