A Glibertarians Exclusive: The Painter III
Brussels – 1932
The Fokker tri-motor aeroplane touched down at the Brussels aerodrome, gently, as though it was a great bird settling slowly to Earth. Adolf looked curiously out the window. For all his travels, he had never been to Brussels before. He knew, of course, of the great port at Antwerp, and the huge arms manufactories at Liege. He had received, as a gift from the Lord Mayor of Munich, a beautiful autoloading fowling piece made in Liege but apparently designed by some American named Browning.
Today he was here for a small showing of some of his works resulting from a tour of northern France and southern Belgium. The timing worked out well, as he had finally tired of Rome. Just a week earlier, Adolf had signed a lease on a large studio in Berlin. His art supplies, works in progress and his modest inventory of personal effects were even now in a boxcar, making its way across Europe’s rail system from Rome to Berlin.
Adolf waited for the other passengers to clear off the aeroplane before standing up. He picked up the one painting he had carried by hand, a depiction of an oak grove that supposedly had been sacred to one of the old pagan tribes of northern France. He marched off the aeroplane, down the steps to the tarmac. Jozef-Ernest van Roey, the Archbishop of Mechelen, was there to meet Adolf, clad in his flowing robes. Behind him was the normal crowd of admirers, including the inevitable crowd of young women calling for Adolf’s signature in their personal diaries.
Adolf walked over to greet the Archbishop. “Your Eminence,” Adolf smiled, shaking the older man’s hand. “A pleasure to finally meet you in person.” The year before, the Archbishop had commissioned Adolf for three studies of Belgian landscapes.
“Indeed,” the Archbishop greeted Adolf gravely. “Ah – you have the painting of the grove at Gournay-sur-Aronde that we commissioned.” Adolf nodded, handing the clergyman the painting. “It was an interesting commission; I spent several days in the grove, finding the correct perspective.”
“It is beautiful,” the Archbishop beamed. He turned to Adolf. “Quite excellent. Herr Hitler, I wonder if you would consider taking supper with me tonight?”
“Of course,” Adolf replied. He had been raised Catholic, although his faith had suffered badly from his experiences in the Great War; that part of his personality had been replaced by his immersion in art. But the Archbishop wielded much influence.
The Archbishop walked away, trailed by two parish priests, still beaming at the painting. Adolf made his way down the row of admirers, signing diaries, shaking hands. He was now, after all, one of Europe’s greatest figures in the world of art, and he knew it; greeting the public was one of the requirements that went with that status. Finally, he was able to make his way through the throng to find two large gendarmes holding away a number of scruffy-looking young men wielding notebooks and cameras: The press.
“Herr Hitler,” one of them called. “Is your work portraying the industrial sector of the Ruhr meant to glorify Germany’s exit from the Treaty of Versailles?”
Adolf normally ignored reporters, but that statement demanded an answer. “I have no influence in Berlin, nor does Berlin have any influence on me, I assure you.” That last was a thumping lie; his depictions of the new factories in the Ruhr were done at Drexler’s request. “But I will say this: Germany has the right,” he called to the reporters, “to rebuild her industrial capacity. The Great War ended fourteen years ago.”
“What about Germany’s imperial ambitions?”
“Please. I am only an artist. I depict what happens; I have no say in policy. I will say this, Herr Drexler and Herr Göring have only peaceful intent. The annexation of the Sudetenland and the land corridor to East Prussia were done peacefully.”
“Isn’t it true that you are just a propagandist for the German Worker’s Party?” another reporter called out.
The gendarmes moved in. “All right,” one of them called. “That’s enough. Move along, mijne heren, or you will be moved along.”
Adolf looked ahead. As usual, a car was waiting to whisk him away to his Brussels exhibition. Following that, he reminded himself, he would return to Germany, this time for good. Much work already awaited him there.
***
Berlin – 1945
Adolf would have been more impressed at meeting the Reichskanzler had he not already met Hermann Göring on any number of occasions; as Germany’s foremost artist, he had attended any number of events hosted by or in honor of the Greater German Reich’s leader. The former fighter pilot had ascended to lead the German Worker’s Party after Anton Drexler’s death in 1943, and now, following the passage of the Enabling Act, stood alone as the leader of the Greater German Reich.
“Herr Hitler,” the pompous, overstuffed Great War hero greeted the artist.
“Mein Fuhrer,” Hitler replied. They shook hands.
“I must thank you again for your work showing the Wehrmacht’s peaceful occupation of Austria,” Germany’s leader said. “The displays of your work helped swing public opinion in your favor both in Germany and Austria, and indeed, even in France and Britain. There has been no backlash from any of the old Allies.”
“It was my honor and my duty to the Fatherland, mein Fuhrer,” Adolf said modestly.
Göring placed a hand on Adolf’s shoulder. “Thanks to you, and of course thanks to the Wehrmacht and the Luftwaffe, the reunification of Germany is complete. We have back the Ruhr, thanks in part to your efforts in portraying that region. We have back the Rhineland, we have our corridor to East Prussia, the Sudetenland and now Austria. All without another war.”
“It has been well done,” Adolf agreed. He was thinking of twenty years earlier, when he had seen for himself the New World’s growing might. “Are you thinking, mein Fuhrer, of any further expansion? I ask only so I can begin to plan my next work, of course.”
“For now, I am content,” Göring replied. “We have ample breathing space for the German people. Any further expansion would mean war with Britain and France, and possibly the United States. You read the papers, Herr Hitler. You have seen how badly the Americans have trounced the Japanese in the Pacific. They have built so many ships that one could almost walk from Pearl Harbor to Tokyo without getting one’s feet wet. No, we will focus instead on making Germany the world’s foremost industrial power. For now.” He smiled, enigmatically; he was thinking privately of a physicist named Heisenberg, and some very interesting work he was engaged in…
Adolf nodded. He had seen the Americans’ potential for industrial might years ago.
“So,” Göring said. He snagged a champagne flute from a passing waiter, handed it to Adolf, and seized one for himself. He held up the drink. “To peace!”
“Jawohl, mein Fuhrer,” Adolf Hitler saluted Germany’s leader with his champagne flute. “To peace.”
Adolf excused himself and blended into the room. He was thinking of something the Fuhrer had said. Breathing space, he thought. Now that is an interesting turn of phrase.
That night, Adolf awoke suddenly. He looked at the cheap wind-up clock at his bedside; it was not quite four o’clock in the morning. He sat up, blinking away the remnants of a dream: The wide-open steppes of Ukraine and Russia, the golden fields, now overrun with the latest German panzers, with the newest jet-powered fighter-bombers passing overhead…
Breathing space, he remembered. The Fuhrer is not interested in expansion. That is regrettable. But while only he can make policy, I have shown that I can influence matters, as well…
He got out of bed and dragged on an old evening robe. He walked over to his work area. His largest easel stood to one side, still holding the big, blank canvas, that had made the move from Rome years earlier and was still empty.
Adolf was holding an image in his head. Uncovering the blank canvas, he gathered his materials and began to work.
***
I left Rome and landed in Brussels.
With a picture of a tall oak tree by my side.
Clergymen in uniform and young girls pullin’ muscles,
Everyone was there, and nobody tried to hide.
Newspapermen eating candy,
Had to be held down by big police.
Someday, everything is gonna be diff’rent.
When I paint my masterpiece.
I’m caught in a time vacuum. Like I was asleep from ’32-45 and not alone.
Thanks, Animal, more intriguing than before.
/Confused in Podunkville
Wunderbar!
Terrific, Animal!
I really dig the reimagined Hitler.
I think going for the land corridor to East Prussia, Would have led to war. Outside of that nitpick, very well done alternative history.
Don’t assume Chamberlain out of the history.
Hmm… Heisenberg was on the wrong track iirc… but without Adolph driving the tone, is this German Worker’s Party so antisemitic? (It wouldn’t surprise me if they were given it seems to be Europe’s most favorite past time and all..). Just thinking if Einstein left or not, if he prompted the US Gov and the Brits to start thinking Manhattan or not, etc….
But nice read, Animal! Thanks as always!
I forgot who recently pointed out that the German antisemitism wasn’t some top-down phenomenon from the Nazis…
ji brought it up then I went on some long-winded rant about how some form of the Nazi party probably would have formed anyway, just less overtly racist at first but may have ended up being far more effectively destructive in the long-term because Hitler was such an incompetent.
Hitler was militarily incompetent, but the SOB understood the political class in Britain and France with frightening precision. The General Staff never would’ve agreed to the risk of another two-front war – and they all expected it. Hitler was a political genius, and it took other political geniuses to spot that. The mid-wit amateurs all took him for a blustering bumpkin.
There were so many Jews in Poland because almost every other European country had persecuted them.
Most of the German philosophers and thinkers even prior to the turn of the century were antisemitic.
The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich details the near-inevitable circumstances which brought about the events that unfolded.
Yet many of Germany’s philosophers and thinkers were Jewish. It gets muddled, as many converted (Edith Stien, for one), but between Germany and the Austrian-Hungarian Empire, there was a non-trivial stream of Jewish intellectuals. [Heidegger is somewhat notorious for stabbing his teacher Husserl in the back (metaphorically) and replacing him at the university where Husserl trained him.]
There’s a reasonably credible theory that Heisenberg deliberately led his top scientists and acolytes down the wrong path on the way to the A-bomb. It is well-known that just before the war, he toured the US to say goodbye to his old scientific colleagues and friends from Europe. Several of them urged him to stay in America; it was clear that war would be coming.
Heisenberg explained that he couldn’t leave Germany; she would lose, he acknowledged, but that’s why he’d be needed afterwards to help her recover.
When he led up Germany’s version of the Manhattan project, he had multiple teams simultaneously going down different paths of R&D, which he encouraged, but anytime a team got close to the right idea, he immediately dissuaded them and put them back onto a wrong path.
We will never know for sure how much of that was deliberate. It’s another Heisenberg uncertainty principle.
I read all the parts, and it’s very well written. But I’m not versed enough in the history of WWI or its players to really understand what’s happening here, except an alternate history. Even if Hitler had found success as a painter, he would have changed Germany’s fate dramatically?
I’m reading it as “Hitler’s motivations remain unchanged, even if his circumstances did.” That and “historical forces continue even without a Great Man.”
This seems qualitatively different to me than most of Animal’s others. It’s got more of a “big idea” feel to it.
To my theory above: I think the time traveler is on a fool’s errand trying to deflect Hitler to other pursuits to avoid the rise of the Nazis and may end up making Germany far more destructive and dangerous in the long run.
Simple WWI: a war of empires where the victors carved up the losers.
And pretty much assured WWII.
Not just a war of empires, until America entered the fray, a war amongst Queen Victoria’s relatives.
Mehmet V and Yoshihito were Victoria’s relatives?
And where Imperial Germany had bet the farm on winning the war and paying for it by collecting reparations, rather than raise taxes. The consequences of which doomed the ensuing Weimar Republic since the tables were turned. The Marxists of that era also all expected that govt to fall to a proletarian revolution, which it did – just not the one they expected.
So the knock on effects of this are interesting with regards to both Churchill and Trotsky, both of whom sussed out Hitler in the early 30s (and run up to the actual war). We don’t really know if the same slimy characters that Hitler attracted end up in Göring’s circle – maybe, maybe not – though it seems to lean to the latter. With Göring in charge, it is also easy to imagine a Luftwaffe dominant over the Army and General Staff – which would ultimately be even worse for Britain.
I had to go find the Pullman hot-take on Dahl.
Phillip Pullman is easily one of the biggest assholes in literature living today. I hope he lives to see a reactionary phase where the Catholic Church rewrites his books for modern sensibilities.
And in case he wasn’t explicit enough:
Wait, did he just call Dahl fat?
I detect a tad bit of envy.
Woke have destroyed Roald Dahl’s books. Puffin pecks Dahl to death.
How does one rewrite Dahl and go home satisfied that they’ve done a good day’s work.
These are the same people who dox car license plates for parking violations on Twitter. They are wired wrong, and nothing will change that.
Sadbeard has a sad… beard.
Anyone know if there is a way to freeze Kindle editions? I have no interest in owning hard copies of every book I read, but the idea of them just stealth editing my copies annoys me too.
https://www.makeuseof.com/how-to-update-your-kindle-book/ — that’s mostly talking about turning it on, but at least as a start – going to Amazon, “Content & Devices” –> “Preferences” and setting Automatic Book Updates to “OFF” might work until they decide too many folks are doing it.
Stripping the DRM and backing up the files are about the only way I can think of to be sure… and the more this kind of crap happens, the more likely I am to decide I have to look into that.
Thank you. I suppose downloading everything to the computer immediately and never connecting the Kindle might work too.
This^
I know how to do this, but it requires that you be able to download the actual files. This is the tricky part because each device requires a different method and I don’t know if you can do it at all off an Apple device.
Get this here Calibre thing, start playing with the plugins, and go to town.
I ALWAYS download my books. I can strip them later if necessary, but downloading them immediately means I have them in case I need to.
Thanks, Mo!
Fahrenheit 451 had a solution.
Ha! Next he will paint up a war with Russia. Only this time, there won’t be two fronts.
Great stuff, Animal, I’m really enjoying this.
Non-cheese Swiss bait.
I laughed. 😉
U.S. To Invade Canada To Establish A Democracy
Kamala Disappointed To Learn President In Hospice Is Just Carter
Like shooting fish in a barrel.
Linked below:
https://twitter.com/disclosetv/status/1627692783321460736
It’s probably just Kevin’s OnlyFans footage
Axios says this is sooooo unnecessary because the J6 committee showed gobs of footage. Undoubtedly those evil rethuglikkkans will present clips out of context.
That’s going to take a lot of time to go over. Wonder if that’s all of it?
That sounds like the number I’ve heard as far as how much footage there is. I suspect the vast majority of it is of no interest and can be set aside fairly quickly.
Most likely it will be released to allow a large amount of people to analyze. Which should have been the first thing that happened anyway.
The Descartes joke (the original that he was riffing off of) is one of my all-time favorite jokes.
Now I’m imagining an alternate history where Lenin’s train from Zurich derailed, killing everyone aboard. Would the Bolshevik revolution still happen?
You still had Trotsky, so probably.
Speaking of WWII:
https://archive.fo/jLFd5
These fuckheads have a one page playbook.
They may get their wish when Biden drags them in to a shooting war with Russia.
Not just Biden:
https://twitter.com/mtracey/status/1619560775017955329
That fool is talking like an idiot. The US plain can’t dial up a WWII style industrial mobilization (AKA “Big M mobilization”) because the industrial plants don’t exist. The 155mm is the largest US surface or naval gun. Why? It is a versatile weapon for sure, but the US possesses no industrial lathes to make larger artillery. The US is manufacturing ~14K 155mm rounds per month for all US and overseas requirements. Russia is producing ~100K 152mm rounds per month. There will never be another F22 made because the line was shut down and converted to F35 production. When the C-17 line was at top speed it produced eight aircraft a year.
We for all practical purposes have no merchant marine, nor do our treaty allies. Unlike WWII we can’t count on the merchant marines of occupied nations, or the then world’s largest MM (UK) to convoy into harms way.
There will never be another F22 made because the line was shut down and converted to F35 production.
No need to be able to be able to replace any top of the line fighter planes. That would be silly.
says NATO is ready for “direct confrontation” with Russia
These cuntes are dangerously incompetent/malicious.
Okay, not to be a dick, but I am 100% certain that there are lathes in the United States that are capable of making larger/longer barrels than the 155mm.
The oil and gas industry most certainly has some, for one.
How about these particular British
cultistsscientists fuck right off.HTML fail.
*EDIT FAIRY HALPS*
You can get away with that shit when London is being bombed. When the weather may or may not be a trifle warmer than it was decades ago? I doubt it.
And I’m sure your allowance will be tied to your social credit score. Totalitarian bastards.
Just wait till LIBOR is gone in June. Then the real financial fireworks begin and London will be engaged in all kinds of fuckery to distract from it.
Especially when they bail-in the banks.
FOAD.
late to the game.
Daily Quordle 392
5️⃣7️⃣
9️⃣3️⃣
What a fucked up collection of words.
I got the lower left and thought I was going to cruise to a good score.
Daily Quordle 392
5️⃣4️⃣
6️⃣7️⃣
quordle.com
Researchers from Leeds said that rationing would help countries to cut their carbon emissions “rapidly and fairly” even though it was often seen as an “unpalatable” option.
/em>
Perhaps they consider getting strung up from a lamppost a suboptimal outcome.
Went down a minor rabbit hole. First, a list of top conservative sites to read in 2023 had TOS on it. Oy. So then I went there, saw Remy had a new song. He posted on 2/17. He has only 17 comments, half of which are spam.
It’s only
moneyones and zeroesU.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken took a helicopter tour Sunday of one of the provinces worst-affected by the Feb. 6 earthquake in southern Turkey and northern Syria and pledged a further $100 million in aid to help the region.
“This is going to be a long-term effort,” Blinken said at Incirlik Air Base, a joint U.S.-Turkish facility that has coordinated the distribution of disaster aid. “The search and rescue, unfortunately, is coming to an end. The recovery is on, and then there will be a massive rebuilding operation.”
President Joe Biden announced $85 million for Turkey and Syria days after the earthquake that has killed more than 44,000 people in the two countries. The U.S. has also sent a search and rescue team, medical supplies and equipment.
The additional aid includes $50 million in emergency refugee and migration funds and $50 million in humanitarian assistance, Blinken said.
We don’t want the world to think our magic hat isn’t bottomless.
While we are throwing funny money around you’d think this small town in eastern Ohio could get some.
“U.S. Secretary of State Antony Blinken took a helicopter tour Sunday”
Sadly, not that kind of helicopter tour.
I read “helicopter tour” and for a second I got excited.
Any reports of a theme park accident?
I can’t know because no evening links.
Afternoon links are late. Do I get to throw tables?!
In a restaurant?
Call the police. There’s a madman around.
I’m thinking there might not be links because President’s Day?
The new Remy video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Krq-GX1IhBc
Afternoon links are late. Do I get to throw tables?!
*rattles tin cup on cage bars*
Attica! Attica!
When it gets this late, I suggest prune juice and Geritol.
Here’s one:
The Bing chat bot went crazy. Or did this get posted already?
https://hotair.com/david-strom/2023/02/20/bings-chatbot-is-really-scary-n531842
This is how it starts.
So this is how it ends, Huh. Five or six fears is a pretty good run, it’s been fun but we all knew it couldn’t last forever. Where are you guys going to migrate to? Back to Reason or some MAGA adjacent chatroom? I’ll keep posting Glibcrostic on my Blogger but I’ll understand of you guys go your own way.
Can I post movies out there on Thursdays?
I’m sticking right here.
Like Hunter on a stripper.
Splinters. Ouch.
https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/20/world/roman-wooden-phallus-sex-object-intl-scli-scn/index.html
What else are are you going to do while your husband is patrolling north of the wall?
Look. Romans knew how to make good dildos. That’s not a well made dildo.
It would be more convincing if it said “BIGGUS JIMMUS SLADEUS” on the side.
Ivory dildos have been found close to Rome itself. But at the edge of civilization you do whatcha gotta do.
It seems to be circumcised wood, which is something I doubt they did in the day. Or at all.
Why just yesterday me and my fellow chalk demon friends were discussing just this thing.
Biden on lynching: “White families gathered to celebrate the spectacle, taking pictures of the bodies … Some people still want to do that”
It’s like he thinks the whole world is “Abar: Black Superman.” I still can’t believe he said that. What an ass.
“White meat and dark meat, take it away!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWSRVYU_JMo
Biden on lynching: “White families gathered to celebrate the spectacle, taking pictures of the bodies … Some people still want to do that”
It all depends on the guest of honor. I can think of a few people I wouldn’t mind throwing a lynch party for.
Spoiler alert: none of them are black.
That seems pretty racist! There’s got to be some statist fucks you’d lynch that happen to be black. Why don’t you want to lynch any black people? are they not good enough for your rope?
No comment.
This is weird:
https://thepostmillennial.com/biden-called-kremlin-to-give-advanced-warning-he-was-going-to-ukraine?utm_campaign=64483
Actually makes sense to me. There is no need to let the people with warboners shriek about an assassination attempt if the Russians launched a pre-planned missile strike for that time period. Of course if during the call biden kept calling Putin Cornpop and asking if there were any other dinner choices besides Kiev Chicken a different message may have been conveyed.
Have they even hit Keeeeeeeev! yet?
Yes.
That Roman “sex toy” looks like half of a mortar and pestle set made by a woodcarver with a unique sense of humor.
Links up ^