Thursday Afternoon Links

by | Feb 23, 2023 | Daily Links | 220 comments

 

TRUMP VISITS EAST PALESTINE, TEAM BIDEN NOWHERE TO BE FOUND:  This is purely about appearance, but appearance matters above all else in politics.

EUROPEAN PUBLISHERS REFUSE TO CENSOR ROALD DAHL’S WORK: Good for them. If only US publishers would grow a pair.

BIDEN ADMINISTRATION DEMANDS ‘EQUITY PLANS: “The details as to how this should be done run more than 200 pages. Those required to comply will include more than 1,200 cities and counties receiving HUD funding. All will be required to develop ‘equity plans.'”

‘MAMA BEARS’ PREVAIL IN LAWSUIT AGAINST GEORGIA SCHOOL DISTRICT: The good news is that the mothers won their suit, and the school board got smacked down hard and had to pay the parents’ legal bills. The bad news is that not one of those shitbag school employees will suffer any negative consequences for their actions and that the taxpayers get it coming and going. Here’s some info on the Institute for Free Speech mentioned in the article.

NH GOV SUNUNU PROPOSES TO ELIMINATE SOME STATE BOARDS, LICENSES: “[E]liminate boards that no longer serve a necessary function, to eliminate boards that are not necessary to protect the public, and to eliminate unnecessary barriers to workforce entry…” Let’s hope he manages to get this past the legislature.

HEART DISEASE REPORTEDLY UP AMONG YOUNG PEOPLE: The article couches this in terms of sedentary lifestyles and obesity, but we all know what caused them to do that.

About The Author

Tonio

Tonio

Tonio is a Glibs shitposter, linkstar (Thursday PM, yo), author, and editor. He is also a GlibZoom personality and prankster. Tonio is a big fan of pic-a-nic baskets. His hobbies include salmon fishing, territorial displays, dumpster diving, and posing for wildlife photographers.

220 Comments

  1. Certified Public Asshat

    In one example, the word “fat” has been replaced with “enormous” in reference to Augustus Gloop, the chubby character featured in “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.”

    This is fatphobic.

    • WTF

      “Enormous” is not the same as “fat”. For example, Aaron Judge is enormous at 6’7” and 280 pounds. But he’s not at all fat.

      • Rat on a train

        Give it 10-20 years at most before we have to move to the next word on the treadmill.

      • rhywun

        Big-boned?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Husky.

      • rhywun

        Chonky.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Zaftig.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Great personality.

  2. R.J.

    Aw crap, it’s Thursday! Gotta bust a move to be ready at 7:00 CST. Work has been killer.

    • Rat on a train

      not real communism

      • Bobarian LMD

        Reeducation camps will fix that problem.

    • The Other Kevin

      Narcissism is the real epidemic.

    • juris imprudent

      So did his parents have any non-retarded children?

      • Brett L

        Polish

  3. Count Potato

    “”promote equity in their communities, decrease segregation, and increase access to opportunity and community assets for people of color and other underserved communities.”

    Still no idea how this, or the other gazillion federal programs based on race or sex, are legal.

    • Count Potato

      “It quoted a Black library staffer who said, “There’s a group of African Americans that have achieved and have it together. And then there’s the group that’s still caught in not having achieved. … And I come from the mind-set: Separate yourselves at all costs from the ones who might still be struggling.”

      So there are two kinds of black people?

      • Zwak, my pronouns are Ass/Asshole

        Male AND female!

      • rhywun

        *faints*

    • rhywun

      +1 soft bigotry of low expectations

      It feels like we’ve been down this road a few zillion times in the last six decades or so.

      • juris imprudent

        Moynihan’s ghost rattles his chains.

  4. Sean

    Ok, I guess…

    *unzips*

  5. The Late P Brooks

    EUROPEAN PUBLISHERS REFUSE TO CENSOR ROALD DAHL’S WORK: Good for them. If only US publishers would grow a pair.

    P Brooks, publisher: Are you the original author of this work?

    Busybody activist: Well, no…

    P Brooks: Get the fuck out of my office, and never darken my door again.

    • kinnath

      Well, without copyright, anyone could to anything they like to Roald’s stories.

      • Zwak, my pronouns are Ass/Asshole

        Mickey Mouse knows.

      • Nephilium

        Not as much as Winnie the Pooh knows…

    • Pope Jimbo

      Never darken my door

      Sounds a bit racist?

  6. Certified Public Asshat

    Trump ended a 2015 Obama-era regulation mandating for trains carrying “large volumes of flammable liquids” like crude oil to have advanced brakes and speed restrictions – put in place after a number of deadly derailments.

    “A lot of the folks who seem to find political opportunity there are among those who have sided with the rail industry again and again and again, as they have fought safety regulations on railroads and hazmat, tooth and nail,” said Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg, who announced Wednesday he will visit the site of the derailment Thursday. “If people are going to find religion about rail regulation, sometimes for the first time, I welcome that.”

    Experts told CNN that the regulations likely would not have impacted the derailment in East Palestine because the train did not meet the criteria laid out by the Obama administration-era regulation.

    Wait, CNN article? *faints*

    • Michael Malaise

      They’re moving to the center, one sentence buried in an article at a time.

      • kinnath

        After hiding for a decade, some writer is peaking out at the world to see if he/she is allowed to actually write a real news story.

      • Bobarian LMD

        He saw his shadow, so six more years of media winter.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        I kept seeing TRUMP DEREGULATION everywhere, but never looked into what it was all about (other than obviously it was an attempt to blame the derailment on him). Truly shocked CNN threw some cold water on it.

    • Rat on a train

      Let me know when they write “The laws proposed after the shooting would not have prevented it.”

  7. Rat on a train

    BIDEN ADMINISTRATION DEMANDS ‘EQUITY PLANS
    Hey Massie, here’s another department that should be eliminated.

  8. Count Potato

    “The article couches this in terms of sedentary lifestyles and obesity, but we all know what caused them to do that.”

    Video games?

    • Rat on a train

      marijuana?

    • Chipwooder

      Fluoride in the water, of course

      • Rat on a train

        That just turns them into communists.

    • pistoffnick

      rock and roll music?

    • Bobarian LMD

      It causes blindness, curvature of the spine, and hair to grow on your palms, as well.

      • Nephilium

        Don’t forget about the spine spike that’s evolving!

    • Michael Malaise

      Couches?

      Couldn’t they Davenport it?

      • juris imprudent

        Sofa king droll.

    • Not Adahn

      High fructose corn syrup. And seed oils.

  9. Tres Cool

    whaddup doh’

  10. The Late P Brooks

    increase access to opportunity and community assets for people of color and other underserved communities.

    And just what the blazes does that mean?

    • Sean

      Moar spending.

    • B.P.

      Stuff taken from you.

      • rhywun

        I don’t know why this hasn’t been tried before.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Maybe I’m naive, but I assume that’s stuff like parks, swimming pools, etc.

      • Tundra

        Children.

  11. Mojeaux

    Egg sammich. Nom nom nom.

    • Tres Cool

      Best egg sammich- 2 fried runny, slice of fried spam, mustard, mayo, cheese, on wheat toast.

      *I buy this weird keto/low-carb bread

      • Chipwooder

        I’m partial to Conecuh smoked sausage, egg, and cheese on an english muffin.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Fried egg, over easy, plopped on top of a juicy medium cooked angus beef burger with bacon, jalapenos, and fried purple onion.

      • Chipwooder

        Similar to the Gusburger, which is the signature offering at the White Spot, famous UVA hangout.

      • Count Potato

        Two eggs? You some kind of millionaire?

      • rhywun

        lolright

        I was just thinking that I used 1 egg for lunch today and I only have 1 left until my next shopping trip this weekend.

      • Tundra

        Eggs at Costco are 7.99/ 2 doz. What the hell kind of eggs are you people eating?

      • pistoffnick

        The best egg sandwich is a gas station egg salad sandwich on a long roadtrip with captive passengers where I have control of the window lock button.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Maybe not the best, but definitely the most entertaining.

      • Mojeaux

        Oddly specific.

      • rhywun

        Dayum. Now I have a hankering for spam for first time in decades.

      • Rat on a train

        Fried egg, fried spam, mustard, cheese on toasted pandesal.

      • Mojeaux

        Fried egg over easy (not runny), on white bread with Miracle Whip and mustard. Sometimes American cheese if I’m not being lazy.

      • Sensei

        Would eat with no issues, but I agree that needs a knife and fork.

        Also I’ve never understood the call for unsalted butter and after that salt in the recipe.

        Since salt is definitely part of the essence of this just adjust the amount of additional salt you use.

  12. The Late P Brooks

    Well, without copyright, anyone could to anything they like to Roald’s stories.

    Put your own name on it.

    • R C Dean

      Without even changing anything.

  13. The Late P Brooks

    Egg sammich. Nom nom nom.

    *envy*

  14. Drake

    Appearance used to matter above all else in politics. Now that elections are fortified and DC completely detached from the reality of life in the rest of the country, they have stopped pretending to care.
    https://thezman.com/wordpress/?p=29380#comments

    • juris imprudent

      DC detached from reality – someone is arguing this is a recent thing?

      • Drake

        It’s the not even bothering to pretend to care that’s new and disturbing.

  15. DEG

    your linkster is off having a life.

    Life? What’s that? Is that what I need alongside getting laid?

    In proposed regulations that would touch any jurisdiction that accepts any sort of HUD funding, fair housing must mean a plan to “promote equity in their communities, decrease segregation, and increase access to opportunity and community assets for people of color and other underserved communities.”

    What could possibly go wrong?

    NH GOV SUNUNU PROPOSES TO ELIMINATE SOME STATE BOARDS, LICENSES: “[E]liminate boards that no longer serve a necessary function, to eliminate boards that are not necessary to protect the public, and to eliminate unnecessary barriers to workforce entry…” Let’s hope he manages to get this past the legislature.

    He might actually pull it off. But remember: He’s running for president. He micromanaged NH’s economy for 18 months during the Lil Rona Panic. He played all sides during the Lil Rona Panic in order to further his political career. I will not vote for him in the NH primary, and I think a lot of NH Republicans won’t.

    “Because of the pandemic, people may be a little bit less active, maybe eating worse,” Liu said. “So that could possibly translate into worsened blood pressure, increased weight, and long-term healthcare problems, specifically cardiovascular.”

    But definitely not the jab. Nosirree.

    • pistoffnick

      your linkster is off having a life.

      I think that means he’s “bear hunting”.

    • Tonio

      Ha! Tonio is in da howse!

      I loaded the bike onto the rack and drove into town so I could ride in one of the parks along the river. You guys would have loved it, lots of UR college girls showing cleavage. I merely found them annoying trail blockers.

      But I did manage to also get in some “bear hunting” at the grocery store on my way home. No details, don’t want to jinx it. We all need the D. Most especially me.

      • slumbrew

        I don’t know if I should be disappointed by no alt-text or just satisfied that there’s nothing more that could be added to that image.

      • pistoffnick

        *wide eyed* You can find bear meat at the grocery store?

        just don’t get tricky-knows-is from improperly handling the bear meat.

      • DEG

        Best wishes on your bear hunt.

        I suspect it will go better than my woman hunt.

  16. Tundra

    This is purely about appearance, but appearance matters above all else in politics.

    Why do people find this so difficult to grasp? Trump isn’t some friendly grandpa lending a hand. He’s a politician. He may actually give a fuck about those people but it doesn’t matter in the game.

    • The Other Kevin

      Biden had every opportunity to do the same thing. In fact Trump gave him a few weeks head start. But Biden is terrible at everything, including politics. The only thing he’s good at is winning elections stacked in his favor.

      • Tundra

        That’s what I mean. The ‘Trump is stupid’ take is retarded. He’s good at playing the game.

      • Chipwooder

        I don’t know, he’s also good at slurring his words together, falling on stairs, and sniffing children.

  17. DEG

    NH Legislature considering seat belt law

    New Hampshire is the only state in America that does not mandate that adults use seat belts, but another attempt is underway at the State House to change that.

    State police said that when it comes to seat belt usage rates, federal statistics show New Hampshire holds a unique distinction.

    “Of the 50 states in the nation, New Hampshire is dead last at 75.5%,” said Capt. Christopher Vetter.

    The Granite State is the only state without a mandatory seat belt law for adults, and police said that leads to a higher rate of unbelted deaths. Trauma surgeons said that when unbelted crash victims arrive at an emergency department with more critical injuries, other patients get less care.

    • Rat on a train

      Trauma surgeons said that when unbelted crash victims arrive at an emergency department with more critical injuries, other patients get less care.
      Where is Dr Cocteau when you need him?

      • R C Dean

        Is it just me, or is this slope getting slippery?

      • Brett L

        No word on the rate at which they survive to be trauma patients versus organ donors before ever arriving at the ED

    • rhywun

      police said that leads to a higher rate of unbelted deaths

      And of course we have every reason to believe what the police says.

    • Sensei

      Proles should only be allowed to engage in economic activity that benefits the state.

  18. Certified Public Asshat

    🗣️ Ukraine is hosting one of the great epics of this century❝We are Harry Potter and William Wallace, the Na’vi and Han Solo. We’re escaping from Shawshank and blowing up the Death Star. We are fighting with the Harkonnens and challenging Thanos.❞ [9/10] pic.twitter.com/HBji5RoWws— NATO (@NATO) February 23, 2023

    Yes, this is a tweet from Nato.

    • Pope Jimbo

      We are Harry Potter

      Um, so they are transphobes?

    • Tonio

      W00t! Can’t believe it wasn’t already legal. Hell, it’s even legal here in Virginia, sorta. Recreational use is legal, but there is still no legal way to sell the stuff unless you’re part of the MM program.

      • juris imprudent

        Grow your own?

      • Nephilium

        We’ll see if Ohio passes recreational this fall (most likely), unless the state legislature passes the proposed bill by early May.

      • Muzzled Woodchipper

        Meanwhile KY is going the other way with a recent bill to make Delta8 illegal.

      • DEG

        Marijuana is decriminalized in NH. Medical is legal but highly regulated.

        From what I understand from some folks close to the Legislature, the reason NH does not have legal recreational marijuana is the NH Liquor Commission wants a monopoly on marijuana sales, but only after marijuana is Federally legal.

      • DEG

        In addition, from my second link, this bill will allow the NH Liquor Commission to regulate and license marijuana sales, but the Commission will not be able to sell marijuana. I am not sure if the Liquor Commission will fight this bill, unlike similar past bills, because they will have new regulatory powers.

  19. DEG

    Vivek Ramaswamy starts 2024 presidential bid

    Just 12 hours after announcing his White House bid on Fox News, multi-millionaire businessman and anti-Woke crusader Vivek Ramaswamy was campaigning in the Granite State.

    On Wednesday morning, the author of “Woke, Inc.” was at Potter’s Bakery in Rochester for a meet-and-greet with voters. After multiple stops, he was at the Red Arrow Diner in Manchester in time for dinner before making his way to a Q&A session at Murphy’s Taproom.

    In a sign of Ramaswamy’s media-savvy approach to the campaign, he had an op-ed published in The Wall Street Journal Wednesday explaining why he is in the race. (“I am launching not only a political campaign but a cultural movement to create a new American Dream—one that is not only about money but about the unapologetic pursuit of excellence.”)

  20. The Late P Brooks

    The underlying social science rationale, cited by HUD, is that of Harvard economists Raj Chetty and Lawrence Katz, who examined data in a 1990s HUD program called Moving to Opportunity — in which a small number of low-income households were relocated to higher-income areas.

    More fallacious modelling is what we need.

    • Chipwooder

      I like fellatious models, myself.

      *rimshot*

      • Bobarian LMD

        Sounds like someone has been reading Q’s newsletter.

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Guy with Polish parents who grew up under communism frets that he just can’t convince them that communism is much better than capitalism

    “Hey, this ditch is full of dead people. Why did you bring me here?”

    • kinnath

      *rimshot*

      • juris imprudent

        Buckweat ‘im eh? Man that’s harsh.

    • Rat on a train

      They took him on a Cambodian holiday?

    • R.J.

      Those parents must really love him to not disown him.

  22. The Other Kevin

    So Biden can impose “equity plans” but he’s helpless when it comes to restoring those railroad regulations supposedly removed by Trump.

  23. Zwak, my pronouns are Ass/Asshole

    The TECHNOCRACY needs no appearance! It is all knowing, and all providing. People in WashDeeCee(PBUI) have perfect perspective of all national matters!

  24. KSuellington

    I’m a huge Roald Dahl fan and really dig the stuff he did for adults as well. Tales of the Unexpected is the main collection of his adult stuff and it’s great. My kids are well familiar with all his books as I read most of them to them when they were younger and now they’ve read them on their own. I ended up buying first or second editions of several of them as the original illustrators were fantastic and I think the later editions that Quentin Blake illustrated kinda suck. We just recently watched the Wes Anderson movie version of Fantastic Mr Fox and quite liked it. Fuck the woke censors. They are collaborating with the dumb ass woke family members of Dahl that now control the boom rights to fuck up some classic children’s works. Part of the joy of Dahl is that he had a bit of a dark side and it came out in some of his evil and revolting characters.

    • Mojeaux

      Part of the joy of Dahl is that he had a bit of a dark side and it came out in some of his evil and revolting characters.

      Sometimes I put my dark side potential into my villains. JBP often talks about how you have to know what depths you are capable of going before you can be virtuous about not going there. Well, I’m pretty in touch with how dark I could get, so I take it to its logical conclusion in my villains.

      No, not ALL my villains are based on people I don’t like.

      • juris imprudent

        Straight out of Jung.

    • Gustave Lytton

      I’d be a little more outraged if Dahl and his publishers hadn’t engaged in revisionism all along.

    • KSuellington

      Heheh Moj, I think it’s a rare person that can be truly virtuous without that. Most kids get a good sense that there is that shadowy dark side lurking out there in the world. I think his books, much like classic fairy tales do a good job of including that as a major theme of his stories.

      GL; What revisionism are you referring to?

      • Gustave Lytton

        https://www.theguardian.com/books/2017/sep/13/charlie-and-the-chocolate-factory-hero-originally-black-roald-dahl

        Oompa Loompas in the original version were black pygmies from Africa.

        The news in 1970 that there was to be a film of the book drew the attention of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) to the work and they said the importation of the Oompa Loompas to the factory had overtones of slavery.

        Dahl insisted there was no racist intent behind the Oompa Loompas but also said he found himself sympathising with the NAACP. As a result, he rewrote them in time for the second US edition as white hippyish dwarves hailing from an invented place, “Loompaland”.

      • KSuellington

        Thanks. I remember them being black in the first edition book. I don’t remember how he described them in the later edition copy we have. I’ll have to have a look later. Interesting that he originally conceived of Charlie as black, hadn’t ever heard that before.

    • Semi-Spartan Dad

      They are really great books. I’m reading a chapter of Danny, The Champion of the World each night with my daughter. We got the boxed Dahl set sometime ago and are slowly working through them.

  25. The Late P Brooks

    New Hampshire is the only state in America that does not mandate that adults use seat belts, but another attempt is underway at the State House to change that.

    Can you special order a car without seat belts in New Hampshire?

    • Michael Malaise

      If you are Russian, you just rip them out.

    • Rat on a train

      Old cars you just don’t use them. New cars require effort to silence the naggers.

    • Spudalicious

      Cars in China don’t have seat belts in the back.

    • DEG

      I doubt it because of the Feds.

    • Sean

      *points & laughs*

    • Rat on a train

      Also descended from slave owners.

    • The Other Kevin

      That’s shocking. Nobody could have seen this coming. Etc.

    • kinnath

      Is there video her breaking down into tears?

      I recall the English journalist of Jamaican descent that found out one of her black ancestors in Jamaica had owned many slaves. She broke down on camera. It was joyful.

      • The Other Kevin

        It’s fun to see people who see the world in total black and white get hit square in the face with the reality that life is messy and complicated.

      • creech

        No, I thought she took the news pretty well. Would be funnier than hell if one of Gates’ lefty guests turns out to be related to Bad Orange Man.

  26. The Late P Brooks

    Help us, Obi-Won-Fed-Nobi!

    In downtown Nashville, chef Matt Farley is serving up trouble for Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell.

    Acme Feed and Seed, the restaurant and honky tonk he manages on the main live-music drag, has been jacking up prices for everything from fried chicken to a rack of ribs. There are two big reasons. Food supplies are way more expensive – pork costs two-and-a-half times what it used to, for example. More worrying for the Fed, so are workers.

    Farley is having to pay $17 an hour, up from about $12 before the pandemic hit, to hire dishwashers in a city where unemployment was just 2.3% in December. A line cook now makes more than $20, compared with $14 back in 2019. Early one evening this month, as the DJs were setting up on the second floor, Farley said he can see some relief coming from lower prices for food. But not for labor: “You’re never going to unring that bell.”

    That’s the concern for Powell and his colleagues, sitting some 600 miles away in Washington, and trying to decide how much higher they must raise interest rates to tame inflation. What Farley’s describing comes uncomfortably close to what’s known in economist parlance as a wage-price spiral – exactly the thing the Fed is determined to avoid, at any cost.

    ——-

    There are some nascent signs that wage pressures might also be coming off the boil a bit – which would be welcome news at the Fed.

    A measure of pay rates in the supercore service industries, put together by the White House Council of Economic Advisers, shows that average hourly earnings were rising at an annual pace of about 4.5% to 5% at the end of December — down from peaks of around 7% to 8% early last year.

    Meanwhile, Congress and the White House are creating and spending just as fast as they can.

    • R.J.

      I don’t know about un-ringing that wage bell. A major depression will force lower wages.

      • Michael Malaise

        I doubt a lot of prices will come down either. Maybe a little, but this is the new normal. I don’t understand the low unemployment rates and the ubiquitous NOW HIRING signs everywhere.

      • R.J.

        I think I do. Biden is still sending out a ton of emergency funding from COVID, hence his desire to keep that emergency running a little longer past mid-terms. I think once that stops we will see what happened to all those vanished workers. I don’t think there is any accounting on just how much money Biden is throwing at the proles. It is significant.

      • B.P.

        During the height of federal COVID check-mailing, I read articles about people staying out of the workforce due to free money being a myth. Then I ran into a friend who I hadn’t seen in a while who works construction. He explained that things are good, dawg. He wasn’t working right then because he kept getting checks in the mail.

      • R.J.

        Yes, it is a real thing. And no telling how much money is being made up / redistributed. Trillions? What stops that – A war?

      • Rat on a train

        People found they can live well enough off taxpayer handouts?

    • B.P.

      Don’t worry. Out-of-control inflation is only threatening Ukraine.

    • R.J.

      OMG. He really thinks a one-time $500 fee is paying their fair share?

      Optics, bro.

      • Sensei

        Plus the convoluted way it is collected.

    • Fatty Bolger

      They tried something similar in Florida years ago, but the state supreme court shot it down. There’s a $225 fee for a new vehicle registration without an existing record of a plate to transfer, but that applies to everybody, not just new residents.

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Let them eat dog food

    In a year marked by stiff economic headwinds, retirement savers paid the price.

    Although the average 401(k) balance rose in the fourth quarter of last year, balances ended 2022 down 23% from a year earlier to $103,900, according to a new report by Fidelity Investments, the nation’s largest provider of 401(k) plans. The financial services firm handles more than 35 million retirement accounts in total.

    The average individual retirement account balance also plunged 20% year over year to $104,000 in the fourth quarter of 2022.

    The war on the middle class is progressing splendidly.

    • Mojeaux

      During The Madness, I begged my husband to take out all his 401k (without penalty) and put it in our very low-yield savings account, but he would not. “It always rebounds,” he said. I am still salty about this.

      • R.J.

        That’s a good idea.

      • Mojeaux

        It WAS before the penalties for early withdrawal got slotted back in place.

      • juris imprudent

        Might have been without penalty, but it would not have been without being taxed.

      • Sensei

        401(K) plans (pretty sure are required to) have cash investments as a selection.

        I don’t recommend them or the withdrawal. Timing the market is a fool’s errand.

        However, people have different risk tolerances and life stages and needs.

      • creech

        Employers strongly encouraged to have money market type investment available as part of their fiduciary duties in sponsoring the plan.

      • R C Dean

        Well, I’m out of the market and into a guaranteed return type of deal with a fair chunk. The math works, I sleep well.

        The chunk that’s still in the market is deferred comp that I can’t get to for 5 years; I’m going to have to think about what to do with that.

      • wdalasio

        He’s not entirely wrong. Sure, you might have been better off (not sure of the tax implications). But, its easy to get whallopped trying to time the market. The best long-term players are the people who stick with the long-term buy-and-hold strategy, on average.

      • Nephilium

        /continues depositing money into accounts every paycheck

      • juris imprudent

        Only way to ‘win’ is to play the game for the long haul.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Over the long term he’s right. However, when you get closer to retirement you might want to take some off the table.

  28. Shpip

    Heart disease is an umbrella term that encompasses heart health problems including heart attacks, irregular heartbeats, or other damage to different parts of the organ. High blood pressure, high cholesterol, and smoking cigarettes are typically the root causes of many types of heart disease, but lifestyle changes and national trends could be behind the increase in heart disease among young people, according to Dr. Jim Liu, a cardiologist at The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center.

    When you see the words “could be,” “may be,” or “might be,” just add “or could not / may not / might not.” Makes things truthier. As in:

    Liu told Insider he’s seen more young people with heart disease come into his care over the last five to ten years. Perhaps surprisingly, the cardiologist said many of his new, younger patients do not have any of the traditional risk factors, and might be [or might not be] more susceptible to other issues and indicators that could increase overall risk.

    So if otherwise young, healthy people are showing up at the cardiologist’s office with heart problems, it could be that more stress and other things that we haven’t discovered yet are the cause, or it might be something else. And maybe the good doctor can do a survey of his young patients and find some commonality that may be a new underlying issue. You should probably get crackin’ on that, doc, before further battalions of healthy young folks fall victim to Suddenly.

  29. The Late P Brooks

    I doubt a lot of prices will come down either. Maybe a little, but this is the new normal. I don’t understand the low unemployment rates and the ubiquitous NOW HIRING signs everywhere.

    Some price hikes really are supply chain related, but there is too much money creation. I think a lot of people have dropped out of the labor market. It sounds as if some of hem might be coming back.

    • Michael Malaise

      Labor Participation Rate is still around 1.2% lower than pre-Covid.

    • Yusef drives a Kia

      Exasperating heat!

      • Pope Jimbo

        Yeah, she def said that. Even though the caption said “exacerbates the heat”. Maybe that is the fig leaf that will let Mr. Fact Checker call that tweet a lie?

        “She did not say that climate change ‘exacerbates the heat'” Four Pinnochios!

    • Rat on a train

      If we only forced people into these heat islands …

    • B.P.

      exasperates/exacerbates

      • Yusef drives a Kia

        Thats why I mentioned it

    • R C Dean

      That, and CA doesn’t get hurricanes, as she claims.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Don’t worry. Out-of-control inflation is only threatening Ukraine.

    We’re the shiniest turd in the punchbowl!

  31. Pope Jimbo

    Uffda. Killjoys suck

    Cops should have just ignored the entire situation.

    • Tundra

      I’ve done it. I would do it again.

      Fuck off, pigs.

      • Pope Jimbo

        We used to pull inner tubes behind a truck when I was a kid. We usually did it on a lake, but during a blizzard? Yeah, we would be down with that.

      • Tundra

        You know Bush Lake down in Bloomington? We used to do all kinds of crazy shit on the ice there. I had a VW SuperBeetle that did shockingly well on the snow and ice. And had a bumper that was ideal for tying a rope or just hanging on.

        And nothing else happened. We all lived.

        Joyless fucks.

    • Pope Jimbo

      Afternoon Ray of Sunshine?

      From the same story. This one was a tweet from an asshole biker who was complaining about some kids offroading in a park during the storm.

      These are the sorts of people we allow to get around town using the second-leading cause of death in children.

      MPLS Bike Wrath (@mplsbikewrath)

      The guy is getting killed in the comments which is what boosted this to a Ray of Sunshine.

      • Pope Jimbo

        If I was on Twitter, I’d love to reply that the guy is just jelly because the SUV driver can still get around while he and all his fixie buddies are stuck at home.

    • Sensei

      And since they chose to do this on a public road with what appears to be a fair amount of traffic it’d be totes cool for me to run over the guy holding up traffic when he wipes out, right?

      • Pope Jimbo

        Can’t tell how much traffic was around. If it was during the blizzard last night, I doubt it was too much.

        I doubt you’d be in any trouble if you ran him over. We’d all agree he sort of had it coming (but we’d still think he was cool for doing it). Unless he turned out to be an illegal immigrant. Then you’d be fucked. Everyone knows you can’t do anything to them.

      • Sensei

        Regardless the asshole will be suing me and my insurance and raising rates for everyone just on the legal expense alone.

        I did the same damn thing too, but on country roads where the only person I was going to fuck over would be myself.

        Maybe I’m a bit testy about this because a group of teenagers doing exactly this almost ran me the fuck over while I was shoveling snow when the son of a bitch wiped out and the kid behind the wheel didn’t pay any attention.

        Fuck him.

      • Pope Jimbo

        Well you were asking for it. What kind of Glib shovels his own snow?

        My orphans would die of embarrassment if I were ever spotted out in my driveway doing menial tasks like that.

      • Sensei

        Hell I even change my own oil in the snowblower.

      • Rat on a train

        What kind of Glib shovels his own snow?
        A flame thrower would be Glib.

      • R C Dean

        “It’s really more of a snow elimination device.”

        Sadly, Mrs. Dean is a hard no on flamethrowers.

  32. juris imprudent

    The Bee delivers for Lent!

    Who needs a stupid Super Bowl win anyway.

    • Rat on a train

      I will gladly give up DC commuters year round?

    • creech

      A poll of Eagles fans showed 21% were willing to give up a $1 million lottery win in exchange for seeing multi-millionaire athletes parade a trophy down Broad Street. Your mileage may differ, as does mine.

  33. Pope Jimbo

    Well the good news is that all those small towns should have no problem finding DEI professionals to write those plans/reports

    At Twitter, the diversity, equity and inclusion team is down to just two people from 30, one former employee said. A DEI worker who was let go from a popular ride-share company said their job search has stalled as other technology companies assess their finances. And just before getting the axe at separate tech giants this fall, two DEI specialists said leadership had stopped setting long-term goals for their departments entirely.

    The layoffs sweeping the technology industry are gutting diversity and inclusion departments, threatening company pledges to boost underrepresented groups in their ranks and leadership.

    Listings for DEI roles were down 19% last year — a bigger decline than legal or general human resources jobs saw, according to findings from Textio, which helps companies create unbiased job ads. Only software engineering and data science jobs saw larger declines, at 24% and 27%, respectively.

    There are a lot of sweet tears in that article. The ones where the college DEI admins complain because the university administrations don’t take them and their ideas seriously are particularly nice.

    • Pope Jimbo

      After four years at Princeton University, Avina Ross left her job in September 2021. She was one of three DEI employees who have resigned from the institution over the past 18 months due to what they described as a lack of institutional support for their work, according to a December article in the student newspaper, The Daily Princetonian. . .

      The departures at Princeton are part of a pattern in higher education, according to nearly a dozen college and university DEI administrators and staffers who spoke with Inside Higher Ed. While some institutions have elevated their highest-level DEI officers to senior positions or even president, the employees interviewed for this article said that more often, university leaders show a lack of appreciation and support for their work, leading them and many of their colleagues to leave higher ed burned out and disillusioned.

      • B.P.

        Somewhere there’s a person who was promoted from a make-work position with the purpose of getting activists to shut up to president of a higher education institution? Wow.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Some of the high profile DIE people in my company departed quietly sometime in the last few months.

    • Sensei

      I think that qualifies as ray of sunshine!

      • juris imprudent

        Absolutely glorious one!

      • rhywun

        +1

    • Rat on a train

      Companies that made promises to hire more underrepresented groups are gutting departments meant to achieve those goals.
      We made those promises when money was cheap. We could afford the losses for PR purposes. The situation has changed.

    • slumbrew

      *insert De Niro Cape Fear laughing gif here*

  34. JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

    I don’t really care one way or another if the President or some cabinet member visits a disaster site. In most cases they will just get in the way. For example, Bush would have been tying up runway space and other resources if he landed in New Orleans to see the damage from Katrina. But that’s the game the Dems like to play when a Republican is in charge, so they shouldn’t be surprised when someone turns it around on them.

  35. Tundra

    Funny money

    Weird when $10 billion barely merits a meh.

    • rhywun

      I love how we can’t estimate the spray of dollars to within 85 billion of them.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    Weird when $10 billion barely merits a meh.

    Crumbs, dude.

    • Tundra

      Awesome. We’ve definitely gone backwards.

      • B.P.

        I can’t remember the last time I saw a group of kids running around pew-pewing at each other. I suppose nerf and water guns are used some.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      Good Tweet and I wish all the fat shamer shamers would go play in traffic.

      • Tundra

        God, they are tedious.

      • R C Dean

        “Do you think fat people don’t deserve dignity?”

        “No.”

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        If I say yes will you refrain from eating me?

      • Mojeaux

        Please clarify: Fat people don’t deserve dignity or they do deserve dignity? Because it kind of reads like a double negative.

      • R C Dean

        It’s clear from context (there’s an Iron Law for that!) that the “No” meant “Fat people don’t deserve dignity”.

      • Ted S.

        This is where English needs a word like doch.

      • Mojeaux

        If it were clear from the context, I wouldn’t have asked. Well, mostly because I don’t believe that you believe that fat people don’t deserve dignity.

    • DEG

      There are lots of good looking women in that gallery, but not a lot of thicc women.

    • Spudalicious

      #3 and the ginger towards the end in the orange bikini.

  37. Sensei

    Never heard of this.

    https://youtu.be/FYfyPtA9sNI

    And the last part listening to the blow off valve while Jason counter steers is ridiculous. Europe really did have the better cars in the 80s and early 90s.

  38. Translucent Chum

    Uh. Did anyone get the Reason ‘did you ghost us’ email? With emojis and everything. Sad…

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    • slumbrew

      Just hit my inbox about 10 minutes before you posted.

      Pathetic.

    • Mojeaux

      I got that.

      Why, yes, I DID ghost you.