Stoic Friday

by | Mar 31, 2023 | Advice, LifeSkills, Musings | 39 comments

Last Week

Recommended readings:

The Practicing Stoic

Meditations

How to Be a Stoic

How to Think Like a Roman Emperor

If you have anger issues, this one is a great tool (h/t mindyourbusiness)

This week’s book:

Seneca’s Letters from a Stoic

Disclaimer: I’m not your Supervisor. These are my opinions after reading through these books a few times.

Picking up where I left off with Seneca’s letters to his friend and student, Lucilius Junior, an official in Sicily.

I am copying a part of the letter in italics and then responding in normal text.

ON THE GOD WITHIN US

YOU are doing the finest possible thing and acting in your best interests if, as you say in your letter, you are persevering in your efforts to acquire a sound understanding. This is something it is foolish to pray for when you can win it from your own self. There is no need to raise our hands to heaven; there is no need to implore the temple warden to allow us close to the ear of some graven image, as though this increased the chances of our being heard. God is near you, is with you, is inside you.

As a non-religious person, this way of thinking appeals to me. I can understand praying for someone to recover from illness or going through a hard time. I never understood praying for strength to resist temptation r for God to help me improve myself. I have always believed that if God is real, those kind of self improvement prayers are a waste of his time and mine.

Yes, Lucilius, there resides within us a divine spirit, which guards us and watches us in the evil and the good we do. As we treat him, so will he treat us. No man, indeed, is good without God – is any one capable of rising above fortune unless he has help from God? He it is that prompts us to noble and exalted endeavours. In each and every good man A god (what god we are uncertain) dwells.

My wife has called me a natural christian because of the way I behave and some of my ingrained beliefs. I am nowhere near perfect, but have tried to be an honest person and have been successful for the most part. Even without believing in God, I used the Bible as a guide for life after I got married. I think it helped to keep me on the right path as a young husband and father.

If you have ever come on a dense wood of ancient trees that have risen to an exceptional height, shutting out all sight of the sky with one thick screen of branches upon another, the loftiness of the forest, the seclusion of the spot, your sense of wonderment at finding so deep and unbroken a gloom out of doors, will persuade you of the presence of a deity. Any cave in which the rocks have been eroded deep into the mountain resting on it, its hollowing out into a cavern of impressive extent not produced by the labours of men but the result of processes of nature, will strike into your soul some kind of inkling of the divine. We venerate the sources of important streams; places where a mighty river bursts suddenly from hiding are provided with altars; hot springs are objects of worship; the darkness or unfathomable depth of pools has made their waters sacred.

The closest I ever come to thinking there might be a God is in nature. I grew up on a farm and I still enjoy walking through the woods or running trails. When I go running at 5 in the morning as the sun is coming up without a soul around, it is a special time.

And if you come across a man who is never alarmed by dangers, never affected by cravings, happy in adversity, calm in the midst of storm, viewing mankind from a higher level and the gods from their own, is it not likely that a feeling will find its way into you of veneration for him?

This is the type of man I am working to be. I remember a few of my leaders from the Marines this way and they are the ones everyone respected and knew wouldn’t lose their head when everything went sideways. I think the Marines I was in charge of remember me the same way and hope I was a good influence on them after we no longer worked together.

Is it not likely that you will say to yourself, ‘Here is a thing which is too great, too sublime for anyone to regard it as being in the same sort of category as that puny body it inhabits.’ Into that body there has descended a divine power. The soul that is elevated and well regulated, that passes through any experience as if it counted for comparatively little, that smiles at all the things we fear or pray for, is
impelled by a force that comes from heaven. A thing of that soul’s height cannot stand without the prop of a deity.Hence the greater part of it is situated where it descends from; in the same way as the sun’s rays touch the earth but are really situated at the point from which they emanate, a soul possessed of greatness and holiness, which has been sent down into this world in order that we may gain a nearer knowledge of the divine, associates with us, certainly, but never loses contact with its source. On that source it depends; that is the direction in which its eyes turn, and the direction it strives to climb in; the manner in which it takes part in our affairs is that of a superior being.

You have to find your own inspiration to improve yourself and face adversity with calmness and rationality. For some people it is their belief in God. In my life now it is my desire to not be “that guy” and also the knowledge that my wife depends on me. In combat it was the faith in my fellow Marines and the responsibility I felt as a squad leader to bring all of my guys back home.

What, then, is this soul? Something which has a lustre that is due to no quality other than its own. Could anything be more stupid than to praise a person for something that is not his? Or more crazy than admiring things which in a single moment can be transferred to another? It is not a golden bit that makes one horse superior to others. Sending a lion into the arena with his mane gilded, tired by the handling he has been given in the process of being forced to submit to this embellishment, is a very different thing from sending in a wild one with his spirit unbroken. Bold in attack, as nature meant him to be, in all his unkempt beauty, a beast whose glory it is that none can look on him without fear, he stands higher in people’s eyes than the other, docile, gold-leaf coated creature.

It matters what is inside of a person, but looking at their exterior and judging them that way is much easier. Having a strong spirit is more impressive than being good looking or rich. I have never understood praising a model for their looks, or being impressed by brand name items. Does that mean I am not superficial at all? Unfortunately, no it does not. I still go gaga over classic cars and am blown away by the money they cost. I do try to not let pretty women turn my head, but that is more from being married forever than it is actual growth on my part.

No one should feel pride in anything that is not his own. We praise a vine if it loads its branches with fruit and bends its very props to the ground with the weight it carries: would any one prefer the famous vine that had gold grapes and leaves hanging on it? Fruitfulness is the vine’s peculiar virtue. So, too, in a man praise is due only to what is his very own. Suppose he has a beautiful home and a handsome collection of servants, a lot of land under cultivation and a lot of money out at interest; not one of these things can be said to be in him – they are just things around him. Praise in him what can neither be given nor snatched away, what is peculiarly a man’s.

I try not to, but I do feel pride in my truck and my house on the lake. In a perverse way I am even proud of my daily driver, a 2005 Saab 9-3 Aero with peeling clear coat and over 200,000 miles. Since I fixed the turbo (that was a test of my Stoicism) it can keep up with newer cars and is still a nice driver. I do understand that all of these can be taken away from me, because they are outside of my control. I am proud of my character and how I react to adversity and I know those can never be taken away.

You ask what that is? It is his spirit, and the perfection of his reason in that spirit. For man is a rational animal. Man’s ideal state is realized when he has fulfilled the purpose for which he was born. And what is it that reason demands of him? Something very easy – that he live in accordance with his own nature. Yet this is turned into something difficult by the madness that is universal among men; we push one
another into vices. And how can people be called back to spiritual well being when no one is trying to hold them back and the crowd is urging them on?

I think my purpose was to be a good leader of Marines and a good husband and father. Living that way always felt natural to me. I do not see our society encouraging this in young men anymore. My 26 year old son is still single, and he said every time he has tried to date a girl, he never wants to see them more than once. He lives in a college town and he says they are so worried about being independent women that he doesn’t see a good future with any of them. I am glad I got married young, it kept me from turning into an idiot alcoholic. Instead, I was a functional alcoholic with a mostly happy family.

Reminder: I will be in Richmond for lunch on April 1st, there is a meetup post in the forum about it.

Music this week is the band I am going to Richmond to see, Eluveitie (pronounced el-vay-tee)

This is a good intro to them.

One of my personal favorites.

The heaviest violin solo I’ve ever heard.

 

 

About The Author

ron73440

ron73440

What I told my wife when she said my steel Baby Eagle .45 was heavy, "Heavy is good, heavy is reliable, if it doesn't work you could always hit him with it."-Boris the Blade MOLON LABE

39 Comments

  1. Ownbestenemy

    I have always called my step father a “natural Christian”. Atheist through and through but you’d never know it because he doesn’t run around stating it and doesn’t let that get in the way with his interactions with other people, regardless of their faith or religious beliefs. Just is a good person.

    • Fourscore

      Sums up my Dad, too. Hardworking, supported his family, let us make our own mistakes. My grand parents were religious to the point of disowning their daughter because of her ‘mistake’. My dad lost a sister. He never, not once, ever disciplined us kids, that was my mother’s job and it was seldom enforced. In later life he and his sister were back together.

      • ron73440

        I lost my daughter for a while, not religious reasons, she chose a liar over me, but 3 years later she got her brain back.

        That was hard on the family, especially the two younger boys.

      • Fourscore

        Good that she recovered and your family is reunited.

        Growing up is tough, my kids caused me many worries but finally grew up to be adults. Just in time for retirement.

  2. Ownbestenemy

    These upcoming two weeks I have to be in OKC will be good. Hate to leave the wife and will try to get her out there but away from work. The amount of stupid I had to put up with this past couple of weeks has driven me mad. However, I did put in for a new job. Not where I want to be but its a travel based one. I can stay in Vegas and hunt for best possible ‘forever’ home at our own leisure if I get it.

    • Tundra

      Good luck! That actually sounds like a really solid plan.

    • ron73440

      Hope that works out.

      looking for a house in a time crunch is horrible.

      It was much nicer when we were on our own schedule.

      • Ted S.

        Yeah. I’m glad things worked out for us.

        Last October, we had an offer on our house, and Dad put in an offer on another house. But the other house failed the home inspection, and then the people who put the offer in on our place rescinded the offer, putting us back at square one. Amazing, the house we’re in now was something Dad was looking at at the start of the search in June, was off the market for a while, and only came back on the market because the rising interest rates priced the other would-be buyer out of the market.

    • R.J.

      While in OKC, try Clark Crew BBQ, Swadley’s, or Billy Sims BBQ.

  3. Tundra

    Interesting letter today. I wondered when we would get to God.

    Praise in him what can neither be given nor snatched away, what is peculiarly a man’s.

    That’s the whole enchilada. The material can be snatched away, the eternal can’t. Being in alignment with God’s will is the most difficult thing we can pursue but may be the best way to exist in a world of stupidity and evil.

    So prayer isn’t a letter to Santa, but an exercise in alignment, humility and maybe even fear. I’ve never called myself an atheist – I preferred the term agnostic – but I am finding myself more and more drawn to scripture and writings of the early Church. I grew up RC in the Jesus-was a-hippie era and I think it messed up my thinking for a long time and was directly responsible for me blowing off the whole thing. Going back to the beginning and approaching it as an individual journey rather than a gatekeeper-controlled drudgery has been quite interesting.

    Thanks, Ron! This was a good one!

    • ron73440

      I tried for a long time with my wife, we even had a church I was active in.

      If we were still living there, I would still go to church there, we did a lot of local charity work and the sermons weren’t boring, they were biblical yet practical, if that makes sense.

      Every church we went to after we left Kansas City left me cold and eventually, I stopped looking.

      My wife doesn’t go to church, but she is active in a couple bible groups and she is 100% christian, but she is ok with me being who I am.

      • Tundra

        It makes total sense. My wife and I belonged to a Catholic church in Minneapolis that we both liked a lot. Both our kids were baptized there. We left when the shit hit the fan in the RC church and, in hindsight, I was too emotional about it. We tried a few others, but the fucking wokeness in the protestant churches left me cold as well. I’ve not found one out here yet, but I’ve been considering it more and more. A good one can be very good.

      • Fourscore

        I tried a few different churches growing up (and later). Always kept coming back to the same conclusion.

        /Non-believer

      • Tundra

        I’ve said it quite often, but Christians are one of the biggest problems I have with Christianity!

        2,000 years of history and they somehow can suck all the life out of it. Amazing, really.

      • robc

        the fucking wokeness in the protestant churches

        I know its a thing and all, especially with the mainline protestant churches, but that is the exact opposite of my experience, to be the point of being pretty explicitly anti-woke. Not my current church, but previous ones almost went too far the other direction at times.

    • invisible finger

      Same here Tundra.

      Just the other day I stumbled across a video by Naomi Wolf where she read The Book Of Genesis from “The Geneva Bible” which pre-dates the King James Bible and then also read the original Hebrew and then read from “The Jerusalem Bible” from 1967. One can really understand how our contemporary use of language with its scientific and legal precision tends to lose the original tone and meaning of the text. There’s a lot more wonderment in the Bible than modern scientific man wants to admit, and teaching the bible to children with modern language tends to take the wonderment out of it and turns children away from it. Stupid pedagogues.

      • Tundra

        There’s a lot more wonderment in the Bible than modern scientific man wants to admit, and teaching the bible to children with modern language tends to take the wonderment out of it and turns children away from it. Stupid pedagogues.

        Well said and I agree 100%. I picked up an Orthodox Study Bible and it’s been quite helpful in tracking the changes and trying to instill the original tone and understanding.

        I’ll check out the video – thanks!

      • Plisade

        This is a really good one. As I recall, the author attempts to translate the oldest-known-to-archeology 2 gospels, in a way that would best capture how the people at the time would have read them in their pamphlet? form. He uses their punctuation, or lack thereof, and grammatical simplicity. The 3rd gospel is his own version, written in the same style, and adds some of the later-found gospels’ stories, like the virgin birth, not contained in the first 2.

        https://www.amazon.com/Three-Gospels-Reynolds-Price/dp/068483281X/ref=asc_df_068483281X?

      • Raven Nation

        I remember hearing a talk one year by a guy who worked for Wyclif Bible Translators. One of his points was that translating the bible was always a tension between word-for-word vs. thought-for-thought.

      • R C Dean

        I think that’s true of any translation. Meaning comes from context, and all that.

      • Drake

        The King James is also great poetry. The 23rd Psalm just sounds flat in any other translation. But reading complex stories in KJ for the first time can be really difficult to understand.

  4. Animal

    I think it was just last week we were talking about this in the Zoom.

    • Lackadaisical

      I saw that. I thought Russia was supposed to be doing this though.

      • Animal

        Russia is refurbing a bunch of T-62s. I gather (or, rather, Dr. Felton gathers) that these are refurbs already done by Slovenia, who are just handing the tanks off to Ukraine.

  5. Drake

    Speaking of religion and stoicism. It does give me comfort to know that all the terrible things happening now have happened before. Elijah took on the priests of Baal who where literally sacrificing children. Baal worship and child sacrifice both seem to be making a comeback.

    Psalm 37 fits well with my mood this week:
    Do not fret because of those who are evil
    or be envious of those who do wrong;
    2 for like the grass they will soon wither,
    like green plants they will soon die away.

    3 Trust in the Lord and do good;
    dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture…

    …The wicked plot against the righteous
    and gnash their teeth at them;
    13 but the Lord laughs at the wicked,
    for he knows their day is coming.

    • Lackadaisical

      Nicely put.

  6. Lackadaisical

    Thanks for writing this Ron.

    Good passage selection and commentary, your doing a hell of a job.

    • ron73440

      Thanks

  7. Ownbestenemy

    Beautifully dressed cables or wiring starts with the trainer. It’s just by zip cord 120 you are tired of it

    • Ownbestenemy

      Errr…zip tie, tie cord…whatever

  8. Lackadaisical

    Watching the walking dead… Prayer seems far less prevalent than I would think.

  9. ron73440

    That’s terrifying.

    • Tundra

      In the middle of the day is weird.

  10. robc

    Were the April 3rd tornadoes 1972 or 1973?

    I know I was very little. Off to wikipedia….

  11. R.J.

    Glad you got better Ron. Excellent work this week!