Wednesday Afternoon SugarLinks – Pepperoni Hug Spot

by | Apr 26, 2023 | Daily Links | 263 comments

via Warty the Hugest, this nightmare of mouth parts and secret things.

Pepperoni Hug Spot: An AI-Generated Commercial


 

PSA: It’s Lesbian Visibility Week, so if you see a lesbian, point them out to everyone loudly. “LESBIAN! LESBIAN!” Maybe use your rape whistle to call attention. The lesbian strangers in your life will love all the attention. Your lesbian friends and neighbors? Maybe go the extra-mile and spray paint “LESBIAN!” on their garage door. And be sure to wear your “L For The W!” t-shirt.

Also, the joke “I feel like a lesbian trapped in a man’s body” is no longer funny. Too many transwomen took it seriously.


 

New favorite Twitter feed:


 

I just can’t imagine why Buzzfeed, this paragon of journalism, is going out of business.

19 Nineties Movie Moments That Gen Z Would Eviscerate Today

Ryan Gosling And Margot Robbie Walked The Carpet At CinemaCon For “Barbie,” And Everyone’s Obsessed With Their Outfits

17 Times Men Were Praised For Doing The Bare Minimum While Women Were Expected To Function At A Much Higher Standard

(No cherry-picking; all from today’s front page.)


 

 

LESBIAN!

Surprise! Tucker Carlson Draws the Most Democratic Viewers in Key Demo, Even Topping Rachel Maddow

Old reporting, but still oddly hilarious. Not ever having seen an episode of either show, I wonder what led to this result… Was Tucker just pumping out more Big Lesbian Energy? Was Maddow’s thick neck just too sexually confusing for Democratic viewers? Was it all the dead Democratic voters with their TV left on?


 

“Kooler Than Jesus”
My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult
Confessions of a Knife… (1990)

The audio sample “I am the Electric Messiah! The AC/DC God!” is from the delightfully deranged Peter O’Toole film The Ruling Class.

Following the death from accidental asphyxiation of Ralph Gurney, the 13th Earl of Gurney, Jack Gurney becomes the 14th Earl of Gurney. Jack, a paranoid schizophrenic, thinks he is Jesus Christ and shocks his family and friends with his talk of returning to the world to bring it love and charity, not to mention his penchant for breaking out into song and dance routines and sleeping upright on a cross.

About The Author

SugarFree

SugarFree

Your Resident Narcissistic Misogynist Rape-Culture Apologist

263 Comments

  1. Certified Public Asshat

    Also, the joke “I feel like a lesbian trapped in a man’s body” is no longer funny.

    AlexinCT hardest hit.

  2. Pat

    Not ever having seen an episode of either show, I wonder what led to this result… Was Tucker just pumping out more Big Lesbian Energy? Was Maddow’s thick neck just too sexually confusing for Democratic viewers? Was it all the dead Democratic voters with their TV left on?

    Hate wanking. It’s the same reason they can’t let go of Trump. Without that seething rage they simply can’t get off.

    • Drake

      I don’t believe that more Democrats were hate-watching Tucker than love-watching Maddow. He regularly had guests like Tulsi Gabbard, Jimmy Dore, and RFK Jr on saying things any mainstream Dem would have agreed with 15 years ago.

      • juris imprudent

        15 years ago is NOT the current thing!

      • Bobarian LMD

        Glenn Greenwald also has a sad.

      • R.J.

        Your answer makes some sense, but I would rather stick with Pat here. Tucker lived in liberal’s heads so much they have to watch and hate wank.

      • DEG
      • R C Dean

        Hell, Donald Trump said a lot of things most Dems would have agreed with if anyone but him had said them. Policy-wise, he was almost indistinguishable from Bill Clinton.

      • Homple

        Morality-wise as well.

  3. kinnath

    Warty’s link doesn’t work

    • Swiss Servator

      I found the terrifying video and fixed so you can see it…

      • Animal

        They uncanny valleyed the shit out of that one.

      • Compelled Speechless

        I don’t think this was AI generated. It’s obviously the lizard people eating at Cosmic Pizza. Desert is in the basement.

      • juris imprudent

        So advertising might not work, but convince me that is worse than 90% of TV news segments.

  4. Drake

    Tucker was saying principled things everyone in the mainstream believed 25 years ago. He was drifting away from the Republicans and into dissident territory.

  5. Pat

    I just can’t imagine why Buzzfeed, this paragon of journalism, is going out of business.

    27 Lame Ass Listicle Websites That Have Gone Bankrupt – Number 6 Will Surprise You!

    • Not Adahn

      *golf clap*

  6. Stinky Wizzleteats

    BuzzFeed problematic movie scene list: No wonder there are no good comedies made anymore. Are they even attempted?

  7. Timeloose

    “if you see a lesbian, point them out to everyone loudly. “LESBIAN! LESBIAN!” Maybe use your rape whistle to call attention. The lesbian strangers in your life will love all the attention. Your lesbian friends and neighbors? Maybe go the extra-mile and spray paint “LESBIAN!” on their garage door.”

    Stop making me laugh/choke at the office.

    My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult – proving the early 1990’s was peak sample. Late enough that almost any sample could be integrated in the studio while too early to be sued for doing it.

    • rhywun

      See also, Skinny Puppy.

  8. Certified Public Asshat

    “I was on a second date with a guy, and I let him know I wouldn’t be sleeping with him and that I wanted something serious. He still told me he’d be walking me home. When we got to my place, I let him in (silly, I know, but I trusted him). As he was leaving my apartment, he saw I had this thingy that needed installing. He immediately said he could take care of it for me if I wanted to, and I remember just being in shock and couldn’t speak. I wasn’t ready for a guy to be nice without the promise of sex. I said, ‘No, no, it’s fine.’ He asked me how long it had been waiting to be installed, and I said, ‘Two to three months.’ He said, ‘Really, it’s not a problem. I can take care of it for you — it’ll take me a second.’ To be honest, I was flabbergasted that he kept being so nice and respectful.”

    …sounds like he was really trying to still sleep with you.

    • R.J.

      That worked with my wife. I fixed her toilet, we are still together. A true romance.

    • Homple

      Nice and respectful worked very well 50 years ago, perhaps it’s making a comeback.

    • DrOtto

      My question is who was she waiting on to install it, the thingy installer fairy? She was waiting for a chump to come along and he did.

  9. SEA SMITH

    SILLY FRENCH HOOMAN DISTURB SEA SMITH WHEN HE ON VACATION. SEA SMITH EXPRESS DISPLEASURE. BY EXPRESS DISPLEASE, MEAN RAPE AIRPLANE. AND PILOT. AND CAMERA.

    • Aloysious

      …camera? That’s disturbingly thorough.

      • Spudalicious

        SEA SMITH INCLUSIVE TO ALL. AND BY INCLUSIVE TO ALL…

  10. Shirley Knott

    The Ruling Class is a great film. Disturbingly fun. Veddy British.

    • SEA SMITH

      END OF MOVIE VERY CRAZY. SEA SMITH WATCH ON SHIP TV. HIM SO DISTURBED, HIM NOT RAPE SHIP, OR CREW.

    • Homple

      I saw that movie when it first came out and at the time had no idea what was going on with the guy and the rope. Something about the goings on obviously disgusted the butler, but it made no sense to me. Good movie, though, albeit plenty bitter satire.

  11. Pat

    What was it with ’90s movies and rampant transphobia? They presented realizing you’d kissed a trans woman as the most horrifying, vile thing, and it just served to suggest trans women are not women and are somehow disgusting.

    Suck my ladydick.

    • Certified Public Asshat

      I present, the comments:

      so what was the obviously straight man in Trainspotting supposed to do? oh cool you have a penis can I suck it? want to get married?

      Response:

      Genitals have nothing to do with your gender identity. There are plenty of straight men who date trans women and love their penises. Not that there’s anything wrong with having a genital preference when it comes down to it

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Nope nope nope

      • SugarFree

        There are plenty of straight men who date trans women and love their penises.

        No, there aren’t. By definition. This shit is peak delusion.

      • juris imprudent

        Even better it comes from a person that would characterize any religious believer as delusional.

      • EvilSheldon

        I would have even accepted, ‘Plenty of conflicted straight men…’

        But nope, anything less than their very own reality is genocide.

      • R C Dean

        Not even that. I have seen more than one article by a transer bemoaning the fact that xey can’t get a date.

      • Brochettaward

        Because the trans shit really is extreme and rejected by 90% of men. They can only sell it to impressionable urban white women with no sense of identity and children.

      • Compelled Speechless

        At least we’re making headway with NPCs saying that there’s nothing wrong with having a genital preference. Two years ago that would have gotten you called a nazi.

      • Ted S.

        Name one.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Jim Norton.

        /End of List

      • Bobarian LMD

        Wait. I forgot.

        Eddie Murphy.

        /End of List

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      I’m pretty laid back and I’d be pretty pissed if a woman I was making the moves on turned out to have a dingaling. Not problematic at all IMHO.

      • R C Dean

        Well, if it was a trans woman, then you would have been making the moves on a man.

    • The Other Kevin

      I really hate living in 2023.

    • Rebel Scum

      +1 She-nis

    • rhywun

      That’s exactly where I just tapped out.

      I don’t care how much you do or do not like the she-dick… trans women are, in fact, not women.

    • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

      I am pretty sure that this would be the vagenda of any relationship if it happened in the reverse.

  12. Drake

    19 Nineties movies that show why Hollywood sucks now.

  13. juris imprudent

    The Warty link is dead apparently.

    • Swiss Servator

      I replaced with a copy of the full horror.

  14. Rebel Scum

    A photo of an unidentified sea creature taken in 1936. This photograph was taken by plane over the Persian Gulf. The pilot described it as looking like a “boa digesting a sheep” and said the tail was almost as long as the rest of the creature

    I don’t see it.

    • SEA SMITH

      THAT RIGHT. NOTHING SEE! SMART HOOMAN.

    • SugarFree

      Preview cuts it off. Click through.

  15. Rebel Scum

    can take care of it for you — it’ll take me a second.’ To be honest, I was flabbergasted that he kept being so nice and respectful.

    Just putting in extra effort to try to bang you.

    • Penguin

      Yeah – it seemed like she was up for a second date, which she had not specified a sleeping arrangement status for.

  16. JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

    Not a 90s movie, but that scene in Revenge of the Nerds where the nerd bangs the jock’s girlfriend in the funhouse is kind of rapey.

    • Stinky Wizzleteats

      If you think that was quasi problematic check out the movie his brother made with Brooke Shields.

      • Ted S.

        Endless Love?

        Shields makes an anti-gay comment to George Burns in “Just You and Me, Kid”.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        Wasn’t he in the movie where she was a 12yo prostitute?

      • SugarFree

        Pretty Baby

        Which is oddly hilarious when you consider they used a body double for most of The Blue Lagoon two years later.

        I try to explain the 1970s to Gen Z and they locked like they are have a seizure.

      • Scruffyy Nerfherder

        Blue Lagoon was my parents’ version of sex ed for me.

        That, and Quest For Fire.

        I’m not joking at all.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        And you probably learned more than most gen-z’ers have.

      • Stinky Wizzleteats

        That’s it.

  17. Rebel Scum

    “I realized I was amazed that he didn’t require me to be hairless at all times, like my exes had.”

    Ew. Shave the legs/bush.

  18. The Late P Brooks

    Prissy outrage is like mother’s milk to some people.

  19. Rebel Scum

    Nielsen Fusion data for October shows the Fox News host’s audience isn’t entirely conservative

    I don’t get the gloating from the deplatformers. He is going to have an audience elsewhere.

    • Brochettaward

      Other Fox News hosts who left didn’t.

      • Bobarian LMD

        Least douchey of the bunch.

        I think Glen Beck still has a pretty good sized following.

      • The Last American Hero

        Megyn Kelly’s landed on her feet as well.

      • Rebel Scum

        If only she landed in my lap.

      • Brochettaward

        Eh. She has an audience a tiny fraction of the size of the one she had at Fox. She isn’t a draw herself. She is a safe, milquetoast conservative you can throw on an established platform.

        Bill O’Reilly landed at Newsmax. While I don’t know what they’re paying him, I doubt it’s but a fraction of what he made at Fox and no one I know is watching. Or cares what he says.

      • Pat

        Glenn Beck landed on his feet.

      • Brochettaward

        I missed the Glenn Beck era. I was an in alcohol induced daze for several years there. Wasn’t even Firsting. It was dark times.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    “The Ruling Class” is a most excellent movie.

  21. DEG

    19 Movie Moments From The ’90s That Aged Like Cow’s Milk

    I went through the whole article. Someone got paid to write that. Wow.

    • SugarFree

      The only comfort to be had is that they weren’t paid that much and probably live with six roommates in a 300 sq ft apartment in Red Hook that is 100% haunted.

      • Compelled Speechless

        That needs to be a movie that I can watch right now. A bunch of virtue-signaling commie hipsters that won’t flee their apartment to escape a demonic poltergeist because they are still way less scared of that than everyone just outside their door.

      • R.J.

        I know of such a film…

      • R C Dean

        Of. Course.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        Haunted by the jizz of someone who got laid there before?

        ‘Cause you know none of the six have.

  22. SugarFree

    I would like to assure everyone that two different real life lesbians of the adult female variety assured me that my joke about Lesbian Visibility Week was not homophobic.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Did they give it an official Firster stamp of approval?

      • R.J.

        With their Firsting Organs?

    • juris imprudent

      You could have the endorsement of a thousand unicorn lesbians, and one shrieking harpy over-rules them all.

    • Bobarian LMD

      “We’re really men trapped in a lesbian’s body.”

    • Pope Jimbo

      Your story smells fishy

  23. The Late P Brooks

    I don’t think the Buzzfeed Miss Prissy would approve of “Miracle Beach either..

    • Certified Public Asshat

      Home Alone would be too much. Kevin uses violence against two BLM protestors who are down on their luck, and shows his fatphobia when he does not appreciate the beauty of Buzz’s girlfriend.

      • The Other Kevin

        You could take any movie from the past and pick it apart for things that are offensive by today’s woke standards, and chances are you’d find plenty. Which is pretty much what they did.

      • rhywun

        You could do the same with any mainstream sitcom up to the early 00’s. It’s unreal.

      • Pat

        Early 2000s? Shit, the Office ended in 2013 and it’s already problematic. It’s Always Sunny is still airing, and Rob McElhenny had to do a 100% serious gay interpretive dance in character to atone for the show’s past “insensitivity.”

      • rhywun

        it’s already problematic

        *has thought, clicks*

        Yup. The best/funniest episode of the series, because of course it is.

      • SugarFree

        But, despite the scene, “Home Alone” could still be considered by many as a flawed comedy gem.

        Fuck off, Millennials. Humorless prude cuntes.

      • Michael Malaise

        It’s one of those films I appreciate more with every viewing. Wasn’t a big fan when it came out but the violence is spectacular for a kids film.

  24. The Late P Brooks

    I would like to assure everyone that two different real life lesbians of the adult female variety assured me that my joke about Lesbian Visibility Week was not homophobic.

    Do they have an Officially Recognized Authentic Lesbian membership card? Otherwise, their opinions are suspect, at best.

    • Rat on a train

      They may be men trapped in a lesbian’s body.

    • Shirley Knott

      You mean a Subaru?

    • B.P.

      Some of O.R.A.L.’s membership may be straying from orthodoxy.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        If they aren’t careful, they might get the shaft.

    • Pat

      We can always just buy it from China. Countries that trade never go to war, everybody knows that.

      • Compelled Speechless

        If the question is only left up to the merchants that would probably be true. Instead it’s left up to the organized crime parading as our benevolent rulers.

      • B.P.

        One of the few products for which they didn’t steal the design.

    • EvilSheldon

      Yes, I agree. We need more ammunition manufacturing plants. Loosen the regulations and establish tax credits for ammo companies.

      And while you’re at it, for having such a splendid idea, they should build a conveyor belt from the shipping docks at Federal’s Ankoa plant, directly to my ammo closet. No thanks necessary.

      • Not Adahn

        SuperVel is doing their <$0.20/round special (minimum order 50k)

      • EvilSheldon

        I’m a little down on Super Vel right now. For one thing, their shipping charges are brutal. For another, they use that horrible Norma 9mm brass with the tiny flash hole that jams up my reloading press.

      • Grummun

        So we just need 10 glibs that can front $1K…

      • Sean

        Hmmmm

      • Animal

        I actually bumped into two Federal guys who worked at Anoka, in the Minneapolis airport. I asked them why nobody (including Federal) was making a decent 16-gauge trap load. One of them turned to the other and said, “What have I been saying for years now?”

      • EvilSheldon

        Does the 16-gauge go along with your man-bun, keffiyeh, ironic tattoos, and CZ?

      • Sean

        😂😂

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        And now we know who doesn’t bird hunt.

      • EvilSheldon

        I go after doves when I get the opportunity, but I usually use a 20-ga. for that.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        16 was perfect for quail and pheasant in the CA river bottoms, but, then again, my old hunting partner just got a 28ga.

        CZ, of course.

      • Animal

        I think the 16 is damn near perfect for upland birds. Almost the punch of a 12, doesn’t stack up as long a shot column as a 20, but most guns (Model 12, Auto-5) the round fits in a 20-gauge-sized frame. My 12-gauge Auto-5 weighs almost nine pounds, but that 16 is a hair under seven. That’s a big difference.

        I did have my 16-gauge Model 12 out after grouse last fall. My Tolley double is lighter but not by a whole lot.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        I don’t hunt any more as I can’t walk very well, but I just picked up a vintage British 2-1/2″ 12 gauge. I have the feeling that it would work wonders as an upland gun.

        But I carried a rebranded Stevens 311 sxs 16 gauge, as it wasn’t something I worried about in those dense brambles and sink holes. Not a very heavy gun, but one that came up perfectly.

      • Animal

        I have none of those, but I do have a lovely Belgian Sweet Sixteen that I’d like to shoot more. The 16 is vastly underrated and under-used, and that’s a shame.

    • juris imprudent

      I used to shoot a muzzle loader and I don’t recall there being only one brand of black powder, though it’s been a long time and industry consolidation is a thing.

  25. Brochettaward

    That Ace Ventura scene where Jim Carrey is crying, dry heaving into a trash can and then curled in the fetal position crying in the shower is comedy gold.

    Hollywood doesn’t even know how to be funny or fun or even remotely entertaining these days.

    • Not Adahn

      I imagine not knowing about The Crying Game makes it lose something.

    • Fatty Bolger

      Wasn’t the shower part a parody of The Crying Game?

      • Michael Malaise

        Yes. Also parodied in The Naked Gun sequel.

  26. The Other Kevin

    Pepperoni Hug Spot sounds like it could be the next Internet in joke.

    • Compelled Speechless

      Or a euphemism for a vagina.

      • Bobarian LMD

        AND.

        Not or.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        Well, what do you call your wife in bed?

  27. Sensei

    Unreal.

    Former Harvard Professor Charles Lieber — who was found guilty of concealing his affiliation with a Chinese recruitment program — was sentenced to time served in prison (two days) and two years of supervised release with six months of home arrest, according to the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the District of Massachusetts.

    He will also have to pay a fine of $50,000 and restitution to the Internal Revenue Service of $33,600.

    And here’s what he was getting.

    As part of a three-year contract, the Wuhan University of Technology paid Lieber a salary of up to $50,000 per month, living expenses of up to $150,000 and awarded him more than $1.5 million to establish a research lab at the Wuhan University of Technology, according to the DOJ.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      I wonder what he knows.

  28. db

    Topping Rachel Maddow

    No thank you

    • Brochettaward

      If Maddow got rid of the 12 year old boy boy haircut, plenty of you would fuck her.

      Some of you act like AOC is some raging beauty.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        There’s a high school photo of Maddow where she doesn’t look half bad. AOC may not be a raging beauty, but she’s decent looking.

      • Certified Public Asshat

        Too horsey for me, but I guess I would still.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Who am I to say neigh?

      • Bobarian LMD

        Whoa there, Wilbur!

      • Compelled Speechless

        Does someone want to take the reigns and trot out a good picture of her so we can judge?

      • whiz

        I’m going to buck the trend and say “no.”

      • Pope Jimbo

        I don’t carrot all for these equestrian puns

      • Penguin

        CompelledSpeechless – I’ll take up JaimeR’s challenge: AOC at 20 or so.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        Are you willing to be saddled with her at a party?

      • WTF

        The greatest sports movie ever made.

      • The Hyperbole

        And there’s not even a close second. Hell, you could cross out “sports” and you’d still have a defendable argument.

      • Pat

        And there’s not even a close second.

        Major League.

      • kinnath

        Bull Durham

  29. Brochettaward

    19. And finally, just…everything about Cher getting with her stepbrother in Clueless:

    Judging by Pornub, this is very much a thing gen Z is into.

    • Pat

      As ’90s movies about banging your stepbrother go, Cruel Intentions would probably have made a better bullet point.

      • Mojeaux

        Yes. Clueless is pretty wholesome.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    Re- Sensei’s link

    A few days ago there was an article about how there is a plant in Pittsburgh(?) which is the primary, if not sole, producer of howitzer shells in the country which is woefully overstressed. The best part? The building (a relic of some nineteenth century railroad empire) is on the Historical Register and they can’t get permission to alter it to expand production.

    Why Pittsburgh, and not Vaqst Sandy Wasteland, Nevada? You might well ask.

      • Penguin

        I used to go bow-hunting there.

        That’s not a nice way to get ammo.

    • creech

      Scranton, pa. Maybe because it was hometown to some Dr.’s husband who sleeps in the White House?

  31. Grummun

    TPTB: Article submitted for review. I’d appreciate it someone could double check the fiddly settings, picture, etc.

    • Swiss Servator

      Set and scheduled. Thank you.

      • Grummun

        Viele danke.

  32. Certified Public Asshat

    Hey @Disney, my home state will happily accept your 70,000+ jobs if you want to leave Florida. We’ve got great weather, great people, and it’s always a great day in South Carolina! SC’s not woke, but we’re not sanctimonious about it either. pic.twitter.com/uf1PWQjGc5— Nikki Haley (@NikkiHaley) April 26, 2023

    Lol yes, this is what conservatives want.

    • Animal

      Well, she’s done.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      I guess South of the Border didn’t send their donation in time to keep out the competition.

    • R C Dean

      Yeah, I doubt there’s many Repub voters saying “Why won’t that mean DeSantis just leave port Disney alone?”

      Oh, and echoing Trump’s dig at DeSantis isn’t going to move a single voter into your column, sweetie.

      • Bobarian LMD

        She’s hoping for Trump VP nod.

    • Brochettaward

      There are a lot of establishment Republicans who think being “pro-business” is a conservative value. Even if that business hates you and your voters no matter how milquetoast you are and the pro part means basically letting Disney have its own little fiefdom in your state.

      There was a conservative congress critter who said that they may not go after businesses that are towing the progressive line, but don’t expect me to protect you the Dems come for you. I think it was aimed at big tech. Can’t remember who it was. That seems like a pretty fair and appropriate sentiment for the woke corporations to me.

      • DEG

        Tom Cotton.

        The bit you are talking about is at the end of the video.

      • R C Dean

        “That seems like a pretty fair and appropriate sentiment for the woke corporations to me.”

        Nah. If they’re woke, they are part of the progressive borg trying to immolate this society. Fuck ‘em. Not going after them doesn’t mean they won’t come after you. They have, and they will, and they won’t stop until they are crushed, or you are.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Beat me to it.

      Total self-immolation.

    • Pat

      Conservatives, the Chamber of Commerce, po-tay-to, po-tah-to.

  33. Mojeaux

    My friend rec’d me for a medical transcription job, where I promptly got a significant raise within 3 weeks with steadywork. I got comfy and though I told them during the hiring process I would leave when I finished my coding course, I felt guilty for soon leaving my friend in the lurch.

    Today my raise got clawed back. I’m no longer going to feel guilty. I’ve got my credential even though I haven’t finished the course, so I’m going to start job hunting. I’m beyond pissed.

      • Mojeaux

        Incoming, within the week.

    • Pat

      Classy.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    Not that there’s anything wrong with having a genital preference when it comes down to it

    Gosh, your magnanimous condescension is truly a thing to behold.

    • Mojeaux

      Yesterday on a huge subreddit, I saw someone say something bad about trans”women” after the whole Dylan Mulroney(sp) thing. The poster was bitter. tl;dr “How dare he claim his caricature of womanhood makes him a woman. He is not a woman. I want my own spaces back.”

      She not only did not get downvoted to oblivion, but all the comments were supportive.

  35. pistoffnick

    …pepperoni hug spot…

    I never sausage a place!

      • Animal

        Crusty.

      • DEG

        Juggler?

    • Pat

      That pun is extra cheesy.

      • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

        Don’t be so saucy.

  36. The Late P Brooks

    He is not a woman.

    *jaw drops*

    Man, I really hope people have had enough of this ridiculous charade and push back hard. Let’s bring back the term “female impersonator”.

  37. Tundra

    19 Nineties Movie Moments That Gen Z Would Eviscerate Today

    You mean the joyless Gen Z? Fuck them. Then show them some 70s and 80s movie moments. That should finish them.

    Also Leper Messiah > Electric Messiah

  38. Pope Jimbo

    Fucking journalos! All I wanted to know from this story is how much tax payer money the “researchers” got. Yet, that is one fact they don’t mention at all.

    The sense of how to shift our position on a playground swing tends to come naturally as part of growing up – a bit like learning how to ride a bike – and now scientists have put together a mathematical model for the ultimate swinging technique.

    In particular, the model identifies how riders adapt how they ‘pump’ the swing as the swinging distance increases. Until now, the perfect swinging technique hasn’t been put down in scientific form.

    Here’s how to swing perfectly, as determined by a new study by researchers from Japan and Australia: When you’re just starting with the swinging, lean all the way back on the forward swing just as it passes its equilibrium point (with the swing chains pointing straight down).

    As the swinging motion builds momentum, you need to start leaning back earlier – ideally at the highest point on the backward swing, just before you start going forward again. It’s this change that maximizes the oscillations of the swing.

    I guess a $1 spent on this study is a $1 that Fauci can’t send to his buddies in some foreign biolab.

    • Tundra

      My grandparents lived across the alley from their church. Behind the church, on a hilltop, was the playground. Some wonderful human being put the swingset near the edge, so that we could swing, let go and freefall forever.

      None of that shit in the study matters. Properly siting the swingset does.

    • Fourscore

      Is there a lot of swingers in real life? I don’t get out much anymore and Podunkville is pretty small.

      Inquiring minds and all

  39. Pope Jimbo

    So who is saying that lesbians aren’t viable?

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Viable for what?

      • Tundra

        Baby making.

      • Scruffyy Nerfherder

        *insert photo of Andrea Dworkin here*

      • Brochettaward

        The Bro could make a First even the likes of Dworkin. His First Organs are that powerful.

      • Compelled Speechless

        You didn’t even post an actual picture and I can feel my retinas burning.

      • Michael Malaise

        Counters with young Camille Paglia.

  40. The Late P Brooks

    Ill wind

    Republicans, who dominate the Montana House of Representatives, have voted Wednesday to formally punish Democratic Rep. Zooey Zephyr.

    Zephyr, who is transgender, has been blocked from speaking since last week. That’s when she told supporters of a bill to ban gender-affirming care that when they bowed their heads in prayer, she hoped they would see “blood on [their] hands.” She says was alluding to studies that show that transgender health care can reduce suicidality in youth.

    The formal punishment decided Wednesday bans Zephyr from attending or speaking during floor sessions. She will only be allowed to vote remotely in the remaining days of the legislative session. It’s a lesser punishment than expulsion, which was also on the table, according to House leadership.

    “I have fielded calls from families in Montana, including one family whose trans teenager attempted to take her life while watching a hearing on one of the anti-trans bills,” Zephyr said during the debate Wednesday. “So, when I rose up and said ‘there is blood on your hands,’ I was not being hyperbolic,” she said.

    Right. Now lecture us all about democracy.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      Not as much blood on their hands as the surgeons cutting off dicks.

    • Brochettaward

      You know, I’m going to agree that the punishment here is ridiculous. The rhetoric she (see, I’m polite) should be mocked and called out for the intellectual bankruptcy that it represents, but she was elected by the voters to represent them and silencing them for their speech is just bullshit to me.

      • R C Dean

        “silencing them for their speech is just bullshit to me”

        The voters aren’t being silenced for their speech.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        Actually, I think the punishment is shedickulous.

    • R C Dean

      “I have fielded calls from families in Montana, including one family whose trans teenager attempted to take her life while watching a hearing on one of the anti-trans bills”

      Ima file that under “shit that didn’t happen”.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      OMG

    • SugarFree

      What in the fuckity fuck is that god-cursed thing?

      • Compelled Speechless

        GORLOCK!!!

        If I recall she’s Galactus’s younger mentally ill sister.

      • R.J.

        I had to look. Anything that gets that reaction from you must be viewed.

    • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

      OK, I larfed out loud, both figuratively, and literally.

    • Tundra

      I heard it was 1,000,000 TIMES worse. Is this some sort of coverup?

      • Scruffyy Nerfherder

        It’s 1,000,000,000,000,000 times worse.

    • JaimeRoberto (carnitas/spicy salsa)

      Sounds terrible. We should start modifying it to make it more transmissible to humans in order to “prevent” the next pandemic.

      • Fourscore

        Heard immunity

  41. Scruffyy Nerfherder

    I don’t believe this theory but it is hilarious to consider.

    https://www.zerohedge.com/markets/tucker-speaks-first-public-comments-split-fox-fans-plan-boycott

    “ Murdoch and Smith called off their two-week engagement because Smith had told people Carlson was “a messenger from God.” Murdoch had seen Carlson and Smith discuss religion firsthand. In late March, Carlson had dinner at Murdoch’s Bel Air vineyard with Murdoch and Smith, according to the source. During dinner, Smith pulled out a bible and started reading passages from the Book of Exodus, the source said. “Rupert just sat there and stared,” the source said. A few days after the dinner, Murdoch and Smith called off the wedding. By taking Carlson off the air, Murdoch was also taking away his ex’s favorite show. -Vanity Fair”

    • Pat

      Imagine getting mogged by Tucker Carlson of all people…

      • Not Adahn

        Tucker the cucker?

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Scranton, pa. Maybe because it was hometown to some Dr.’s husband who sleeps in the White House?

    It has been there a while, so you can’t really pin that one on him.

    The factory — built for the Delaware, Lackawanna and Western Railroad just after 1900, when the city was a rising coal and railroad powerhouse — has produced large-caliber ammunition for the military going back to the Korean War.

    Link

  43. robodruid

    Hey @ Mojeaux
    I did respond to you with my email or number
    Robodruid100@gmail.com

    • Mojeaux

      Oh! I’ll get on that when I get back to my office.

    • Mojeaux

      Okay, just sent another email, from moriah at moriahjovan dot com.

    • R.J.

      Thank you sir may I have another!

    • Pat

      I remember humorously philosophizing with friends about precisely that scenario back in high school. As I recall, the final consensus was that it wasn’t cheating unless they both sucked your dick.

  44. ruodberht

    The “lesbian trapped in a man’s body” thing happens because a significant number of trans are just autogynephilic.

    There’s a brilliantly titled book about it: Men Trapped in Men’s Bodies.

    • Brochettaward

      I have never seen a leftie explain the logic of people who are straight transitioning to be what are nominally supposed to be marginalized members of society (aka transitioning to be a gay man or a lesbian). Or anyone explain why there is almost a cottage industry of grifters who sell themselves as being members of oppressed races.

      I am personally aroused by Firsts and Firsting related foreplay.

  45. Brochettaward

    Candace Owens is threatening to sue Steven Crowder. Crowder on Tuesday announced his wife filed for divorce from him and that that shit is over. Crowder claims people behind the scenes were extorting him over it because he kept it secret (rumors have been around for a while). Owens is also accusing Crowder of having hit on her in DM’s on Twitter.

    Owens also invited his ex-wife on to her show.

    Crowder may or may not have implied that it should be illegal for women to divorce men of their own accord.

    This all comes on the heels of his former co-host and stand-up comedian Dave Landau trashing him on Michael Malice’s show. Speaking of which, I don’t know how some of you watch Malice. Guy’s interview style made me want to throw and break shit. Let your subject talk.

    • Brochettaward

      One of Crowder’s former staff members, Owen Benjamin, has claimed Crowder is a closeted gay. At least according to internet trolls. I don’t follow Benjamin’s inane rants.

    • Pat

      Left wing activists can set up a flash mob anywhere in the contiguous United States to burn down a few city blocks with a few hours’ notice. Right wing activists can set up a circular firing squad with only a few minutes’ notice.

      It’s amazing the trifling amount of fame that can inflate the human ego like a Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade balloon.

      • Count Potato

        “Left wing activists can set up a flash mob anywhere in the contiguous United States to burn down a few city blocks with a few hours’ notice.”

        That’s not good.

  46. Count Potato

    “Elementary schools in Connecticut are now offering menstrual products in the boy’s bathrooms after a law was passed requiring schools to provide these products in men’s restrooms”

    https://twitter.com/libsoftiktok/status/1651305427475234820

    Your tax dollars at work.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      I’m rapidly coming to the view that given the threat of a full-blown WW3 or a global depression, I don’t have time for that shit.

      The people pushing it are completely expendable.

      • Count Potato

        This is more of a threat of clogged toilets.

      • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

        More likely a bunch of dudes having tampon fights.

    • R.J.

      Those things are GREAT for plugging toilets. The school will regret it.

    • Brochettaward

      Heckling gets noticeably louder once he praises Tucker Carlson.

      • Brochettaward

        I would be embarrassed to be on the side of people who sit their in stunned silence when confronted with what my side says is ridiculous, loony take on modern events.

        These are among the intellectual leaders of the left, I suppose. They can’t respond, have nothing to say. They have now it, no ability to think on their own, no ability to confront a differing opinion outside the bubble of what they deem to be acceptable thought. And they finally resort to force to take the guy out after someone in the audience gets in his face even though he said he was done with his question/point.

        Libertarian, conservative etc. that’s just a very revealing moment for how intellectually bankrupt the left has become.

      • Scruffyy Nerfherder

        And the dude is a full-blown socialist.

        It’s come to the point that I have more in common with old-school commies than I do with the political “center”.

    • Zwak , who will swing for the crime, in double time!

      Right now the right is sitting at the same place the left was sitting at, oh, right around Vietnam. They might not have the same mouth pieces, but the internet age has changed that anyway.

  47. R.J.

    My wife saw absolutely nothing odd about the pepperoni hug spot commercial.

  48. KK the Porcine Pearl-Eater

    My neighbor has taken my trash down to the dumpster twice. I see why leftists hate rednecks so much – they’re nice, non-miserable, normal people. And leftism ain’t nothing but envy in political form

    • Ted S.

      He’s trying to get in your pants.

    • Count Potato

      No, TMITE

    • rhywun

      LOL I love the pronunciation guide for a furriner-sounding name.

    • Brochettaward

      They were caught giving Hillary questions in advance of a debate. I’m fairly certain it was common for Obama to have his questions screened, too. This is just standard practice for the left at this point.

    • Scruffyy Nerfherder

      In an honorable world the “journalist” would be shamed out of the profession.

  49. Count Potato

    “How isn’t this biggest story in America?

    The former deputy director of the CIA told @Jim_Jordan
    under oath that he orchestrated the Hunter Biden ‘Russian disinfo letter’ after he spoke to the Biden Campaign and that the letter’s purpose was to help Joe Biden win the election.”

    https://twitter.com/miltimore79/status/1651199697024073731

    TMITE

    • Sensei

      Because we knew it already and it either mattered or didn’t depending on your team.

      It is just another reminder of the breakdown of society.

    • rhywun

      “How isn’t this biggest story in America?

      You know why.

      • Scruffyy Nerfherder

        My guess is the Fed (Powell) will backstop them. This is a liquidity battle between the Fed and the ECB to see who runs out of ammo first. The ECB wants the Fed to pivot, Powell wants to shore up the dollar. These are exclusionary items.

        Unfortunately, I think Yellen is working for the ECB.

        The hysteria is going to reach a fever pitch over the next few weeks and months as the financial chickens all come home to roost.

      • Sensei

        Depositors, yeah.

        It’s equity that is the only question. Right now it is approaching zero, however.