Along the coast, to the south
“It’s hard to believe that stroke of luck.”
Hengist was in the longboat’s bow, leaning on the railing, lost in a brown study. “That may be, General Gustafson. But her infantry is still in the field. Not as mobile, but still in the field. The larger ships, the Jutlanders, were there just off the beach, but from what we’ve heard they had several longboats. Those could have gone up-river.”
“Something else bothers you about this,” Gustafson said.
Hengist turned. “It does. Do you know what town lays up that river?”
“No.”
“Tillgatt. A trading town. I took Mabinne there, to trade for goods to see us over the winter. Why would she go that far upriver, to strike a trading town? There is nothing else along this river save a few farms.”
“I have no idea. A trading town, you say?”
Hengist turned back to his perusal of the gray ocean waters. “There must be some reason. Something lies there that she wanted. My worry, General, is this: Did she find it?”
General Gustafson considered that. “Since we do not know, I can see no reason to change our plans.”
Hengist nodded. “You make a fair point. We’ll continue south as we planned.”
“To Beretan,” Gustafson said.
“To Beretan.”
Hengist replayed the sudden attack in his mind. When they had seen the beached ships, his five hundred left his own fleet, crossed a bridge of ice conjured by Kristol and approached from the dunes, but it was the twins that had done much of the heavy lifting; one of Hengist’s longboats had approached from seaward, with the twins standing in the bow, holding hands.
The Jutlanders guarding the landing site had launched a volley of arrows, but the twins froze them in place, then incinerated the ships and the frozen men. By the time the Ikslunders crested the dunes and charged, there was little left to kill.
Their power is impressive, Hengist mused. But I can’t ask that of them too often.
He looked back. The twins were asleep under a bison robe. Using magic at that scale, Hengist knew, was exhausting. But it worked.
They’ll want to obtain more ships, he thought. There’s a port a day’s sail to the south if the winds hold. That’s where they will go. We need to find a spot in between, lay an ambush. Make them come to us. We won’t get this lucky again.
“They know we’re after them now,” General Gustafson pointed out.
Hengist considered that. “Good.” He thought very rapidly for about ten heartbeats. “What do we know of Mabinne’s forces? Their numbers?”
“Around five hundred,” Gustafson said. “Of course, we confirmed maybe forty dead on that beach, so take that away. From what I’ve heard of survivors of their raids, Mabinne has a large contingent of Jutlander infantry now – maybe three to four hundred – and perhaps fifty or sixty various magic-users, mostly ice and fire, some wind.”
“We outnumber them in conventional forces, then, but they have us badly outmatched in magic. So, we need to minimize their advantage. Magic is best used at some distance, wouldn’t you agree?”
“I would.”
“A close-in ambush, then. We must negate their magic-users as fast as possible. How many binding collars do we have?”
“Six,” Gustafson replied. “The mage who was making them was in Port Stronghold, and now…”
“We won’t be able to obtain any more until someone else figures out the making of them. Very well. Most, if not all, of Mabinne’s magic-users will just have to be killed, but make it plain to all the men, I want Mabinne alive.”
“Set the twins against her?”
“That was my thought.” Hengist looked pensive for a moment. “But I would prefer to hold the twins in reserve. If we can take out the magic-users with our infantry, so much the better; the twins can face Mabinne and her fire-user companion, if necessary. To do this, we need to find good ground, lay an ambush. If I remember this stretch of coast, there’s a village at a river mouth south of here. Let’s try this…” He went on for several minutes.
“Do you think the twins will be ready for a fight again if they are needed? That last action tired them badly, I’m not sure they have recovered yet.”
“We are ready.”
Both men turned. Agneyastra and Kristol stood there, holding hands. They looked a trifle unsteady in the rocking longboat, but they wore determined expressions. “We are ready,” Agneyastra repeated. “If we can do as you say, it may be the last battle.”
“We can hope,” General Gustafson said.
Hengist nodded. “Very well. Let us proceed.”
Two days later
The village proved to be more of a town, with a sturdy dock on the waterfront and houses and shops laid out in a rough oval facing the water. Heavy forest surrounded the town on the side away from the ocean. “Better and better,” Hengist mused as the Ikslunders approached.
The town had some magistrates and one elderly woman who wielded wind magic, but they posed little trouble to Hengist’s troops. Hengist ordered the longboats run aground, and his troops stormed into the town. The locals who resisted were put to the sword. The rest were herded into a large warehouse near the waterfront and put under guard. “Anyone who makes a sound,” Hengist warned them, “will be run through.”
The townspeople believed him.
As evening drew on, Hengist agreed to let a delegation from the townspeople gather food and water, which they did under guard. Near the docks and in the trees was a flurry of activity as the Ikslund infantry dug pits, and gathered branches to conceal the earthworks. That work went on through the night, in shifts to allow the men some sleep.
In the morning, when the preparations were complete, Hengist called the captains of the infantry together, along with the magic-user twins. With General Gustafson at his side, he addressed them.
“I want every man to know the plan,” he began. “Every swordsman, every archer, every watercarrier in the back rank.”
The captains nodded.
“You have seen how Mabinne’s army operates. In discussion with General Gustafson, we have examined her attack pattern, how she deploys her Jutlander infantry, and how she uses her magic-wielders. You all know she depends on the infantry to act as a screen, behind which her magic-users advance.”
“That is what we will take advantage of,” Gustafson said.
Hengist went on to explain the plan, walking the captains around the proposed battlefield, pointing out each earthwork, each pit, all the preparations. When this was done, one of them spoke up.
“General,” the man said, reluctantly, “…if this works, it will be a great victory. But if Mabinne the Merciless dispositions her forces in any different way, well, we will be at the mercy of her magic-users.”
“We have magic-users of our own,” Agneyastra snapped.
“Two of you,” the captain replied. “Against maybe two-score of Mabinne’s.”
“That is why the traps we laid are key,” Hengist said. “We need you to choose the very best men to carry this out. They will need to move swiftly, quietly, and mercilessly.”
“And the lady herself? Mabinne the Merciless?”
“General Gustafson and I will take her ourselves,” Hengist replied. “I have faced her in combat before. She is more powerful now, but I also know her better now. I have promised the King I would take her to him in chains, and that is what I intend to do.”
“Go and talk to your men,” General Gustafson ordered. The captains dispersed, and Gustafson looked keenly at Hengist. “Sure about this, are you? I would never question you in front of the men, but Captain Horst has a point; this plan could go badly wrong in any number of ways.”
“I know. But the initiative will be ours. That’s half the battle. The best archers will be in place. You and I will be in place. The ships are down the coast, hidden behind that headland to the south. If we can only keep surprise on our side, then this will work. Once it’s down to an infantry battle, we have all the advantages.”
“Fair enough,” Gustafson said.
There was a shout from the top of a tall dune. “Ships in sight – bound our way from the north!”
Hengist turned to a soldier standing nearby. “Pass the word – light the fires.”
“At once, General Hammer-fist,” the man said, grinning. He ran off to alert several other men who lounged nearby, awaiting this very command.
Hengist knows Mabinne well — and knowing is half the battle. Ikslund Joe!
More seriously — that’s going to have to be one heck of a job of concealment to cover up enough pits for the troops to be hidden from the infantry wave so they can take the magic users in the rear like Hengist wants with Mabinne… er… a flanking thrust… um… he’ll want to burst from concealment before she can cover her sensitive….
You know… I’ll just see myself out and thank Animal for another chapter.
“General,” the man said, reluctantly, “…if this works, it will be a great victory. But if Mabinne the Merciless dispositions her forces in any different way, well, we will be at the mercy of her magic-users.”
Foreshadowing. This fight won’t go well.
I don’t see Animal letting a rapist prevail.
They both go up in flames or get frozen into a block.
Can you see Animal letting someone who slaughters innocents in revenge for a rape prevail?
Like Ron says, maybe they both lose.
Yeah, I think that’s the most likely outcome.
But what if he’s an Analrapist?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Bmk-WrYJKc
Who’s looking for a new start?
You mean therapist?
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/199917670939398856/
Battle plans never go awry. I’m sure they will be fine.
Thanks, Animal! Love these cliffhangers.
I kind of hope they both lose.
Guess I’ll have to wait for next week.
Perfect. Getting on a plane to CA. I needed this chapter! Thanks!
Thoughts and prayers.
I’m supposed to go to LA this month but most of the people I need to see aren’t back in their offices yet.
Bud Light faced a backlash over its campaign with a trans influencer. But a poll finds a majority of American beer drinkers support such campaigns.
Despite a recent backlash, a majority of US beer drinkers appear to approve of brands partnering with transgender influencers.
That’s according to a new poll by Morning Consult that surveyed 4,401 people two weeks after Dylan Mulvaney, a trans influencer, announced her partnership with Bud Light on April 1.
Some right-wing groups — who have made transphobia a key part of their national message — immediately vilified Mulvaney, Bud Light, and its parent company, Anheuser-Busch, calling for mass boycotts.
Yet of the monthly beer drinkers that Morning Consult surveyed, 53% responded that they had a very favorable or somewhat favorable response to a brand hiring a transgender spokesperson.
Money is not important. Poll results are the great!
Wonder where they found the beer drinkers they surveyed.
Surely these people aren’t biased?
San Francisco sex shops and Antifa rallies.
Lol. The market is the most accurate poll ever developed.
Sorry, losers.
Ignore those revealed preferences, look at these stated preferences!
Somewhat relevant econ humor:
https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/eulogy
Lol. Very nice.
Yet Budweiser somehow lost at least $5Billion in market value in the 5 days following the Mulvaney fiasco.
And most of that recovered quite quickly. The 6M and 1Y charts barely show a blip.
Stock prices are speculative.
It’s the quarterly results that I want to see.
Actually, given that I don’t know how much stock distributors carry, it may take a while for a hit to show up in the financials.
It will percolate up from the bottom as retailers return beer past the Sell-Buy date and reduce future orders.
lol Sure it does.
Domestic light beer drinkers totally want more trans spokespeople.
“Monthly beer drinkers”
1) Good chapter, Animal.
2) I don’t have a problem with Mulvaney, really. Grifters grift. It’s what they do. If idiots at Ambev want to pay them ludicrous sums of money, (e.g., $5 or more), so be it. I don’t have to buy their crappy product.
As to the poll, I’m as certain it’s correct as I am to the AZ election.
Some of my buddies are starting to call Bud Light tranny fluid
*snort*
Seems appropriate for the bud light demographic
I would have thought it would be more.
*shrug*
Those 4401 people drink PBR ironically.
who have made transphobia a key part of their national message
Because “leave the kids alone” is transphobic.
Bud Light Poll Reveals Depth Of Dylan Mulvaney Partnership Backlash
The negative impact of the Dylan Mulvaney-Bud Light partnership boycott may be serious but not as bad as it initially appeared, a poll suggests.
A survey conducted by Redfield & Wilton Strategies on behalf of Newsweek has found that the overwhelming majority of individuals who were buying Bud Light before the controversy would continue to do so. However, it found that 12 percent of Bud Light drinkers would no longer continue to buy it, which, if translated to lost sales, would imply a serious hit to the company’s revenue.
Only 12%. Surely that won’t change executive bonuses.
The online poll for Newsweek was conducted on April 24, 2023, and had a sample size of 1,500 adults in the United States over the age of 18 with a 2.53 percent margin of error.
Participants were asked: “Bud Light recently hired Dylan Mulvaney, a prominent transgender person, to advertise its brand. To what extent, if at all, do you support or oppose this decision?”
Thirty-five percent of the participants said they “strongly support” the decision while 25 percent said they neither support nor oppose it and 18 percent said they support it. Fifteen percent of respondents said they strongly oppose, while 4 percent said they oppose and 3 percent said they don’t know.
With apologies to Mark Twain:
There are three types of liars in this world: Liars; Damn Liars; and Pollsters.
The very existence of this article means the damage is worse than they want to let on.
A company will do market research and polls all the time. It almost never makes it public.
I doubt the veracity of the claims, this is another attempt at damage control.
I agree.
The fact these polls are being published is a very bad sign for Big Bud.
Even if true, and no real reason to doubt it (bring the usual) pissing off even 15% of your customer base for no reason isn’t good business.
For all the glib parents:
https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/care-2
Cell phone did not exist until my kids were well into teenage life. They were out of the house before I got my first cell phone.
We got an analog cell phone when they were ~16 and 13. Left the oldest at home (at 18) while we went on a trip.
“Here’s the cell phone, only for emergencies!”
The bill for that week was almost $900.
How long did it take him/her to pay it off?
Thanks for the story Animal.
I look forward to Monday lunch story time.
Not the Wednesday lunch story time?
Anticipate perhaps. Fear perhaps. But not look forward to.
I figured everybody’s comments about their revulsion was as much for show as SugarFree’s over-the-top raunchiness.
Relevant.
That was a scary dude.
Still is, I remember he punched some asshole that wouldn’t leave him alone.
What is wrong with that guy?
Who thinks to themselves, “Of all the possible people on the planet, I am going to antagonize Mike Tyson”?
“Huh, a guy with known control issues who punches people for a living. Sure, I’ll irritate the crap out of him.”
https://youtu.be/lw9azZmLxtw
https://youtu.be/zrX9Ca7LSyQ
Speaking of which
https://www.ssc.spaceforce.mil/Portals/3/Space%20Systems%20Command%20Hosts%20Ceremony%20Honoring%20Astronaut%20%20Fighter%20Pilot%20Colonel%20Buzz%20Aldrin%27s%20Honorary%20Appointment%20to%20Brigadier%20General.pdf
Honorary only, no bump in retirement pay.
Two people who needed punching. Here’s Rivera getting slapped around figuratively last week.
https://youtu.be/SVjb9fF-Hjc?t=272
Wow, I suddenly like Gutfeld a lot more.
Gutfeld is awesome. He needs to take a cue from Tucker and get the hell out of there so that sinking ship of boomer-con nitwits and controlled opposition plants can land at the bottom of the sea where it belongs. Why did anyone ever think that putting a microphone in front of that mustachioed 1/10 wit was a good idea?
Geraldo is such a giant douchbag.
Don’t forget his Mysteries.!
Tyson’s name always makes me think of Robert Schimmel; that’s very NSFW.
Despite a recent backlash, a majority of US beer drinkers appear to approve of brands partnering with transgender influencers.
That’s according to a new poll by Morning Consult that surveyed 4,401 people two weeks after Dylan Mulvaney, a trans influencer, announced her partnership with Bud Light on April 1.
“Random Samples”? What does Junior Samples say?
Do you drink beer is bit different than do you drink Bud Light or other domestic light beers.
But this way you (barely) get the answer you want.
They had to go to “monthly beer drinker” to get a whopping 53% approval.
2) I don’t have a problem with Mulvaney, really. Grifters grift.
My initial response was, “Big deal. Bud will sell their beer to anybody.”
I found the comments from the “marketing executive” irksome. What idiot put her in charge of Bud light? She probably would have been completely invisible in the seltzer brand portfolio. It couldn’t have been an accident.
But this way you (barely) get the answer you want.
That’s like the polls out there saying “52% of Democratic voters are somewhat okay with a second Biden campaign.”
Woohoo. GLASS HALF FULL!
We asked 1000 Democrats: How do you feel about a second Biden campaign?
a) Extremely positive
b) Very positive
c) Somewhat positive
d) A little positive
e) I’m voting for Trump
The backlash again Big Bud as big enough for the left wing to dispatch the cavalry.
It’s a multi-front war for them now. They got caught placing porn in schools, mutilating babies and grooming everything that moves.
Lots of freak outs.
The backlash again Big Bud as big enough for the left wing to dispatch the cavalry.
It’s just a scratch.
Coming unravelled
Former Sen. Joe Lieberman, the Connecticut Democrat-turned-Independent long known for his centrist views, voted for Joe Biden in 2020. But as Biden’s reelection campaign begins, Lieberman is preparing to recruit a third-party candidate capable of defeating the Democratic president.
“Centrists and moderates feel that he’s governed more from the left than they hoped,” Lieberman, a leader of the group, No Labels, said of Biden in an interview. “He hasn’t been able to be the unifier that he promised to be.”
Biden’s political challenges are not confined to voters in the middle. In the days since he formally launched his 2024 campaign, key members of the sprawling political coalition that lifted him over former President Donald Trump in 2020 are far from excited about the prospect of four more years. That underscores the test confronting Biden as he aims to motivate the coalition of African Americans, Latinos, young people, suburban voters and independents to show up for him again.
John Paul Mejia, the 20-year-old spokesman for the progressive Sunrise Movement, says Biden has simply not done enough to ensure the young voters who rallied behind him in 2020 would do so again.
The media is going to have to do everything they can to make sure Former President Cartoon Villain is the Republican candidate.
“the sprawling political coalition that lifted him over former President Donald Trump”
Love this phrasing. Sounds like he used political skills to bring together people of different interests, when that sprawling coalition was just people who didn’t like Trump.
motivate the coalition of African Americans, Latinos, young people, suburban voters and independents to show up for him again.
As I recall, the exit polls showed Trump got increased percentages of voters from blacks, latinos, women, and younger voters in 2024 over 2020. I don’t recall if that carried over to the suburbs.
And, yet, Trump somehow lost that election.
‘capable of defeating the Democratic president.’
Read as “capable of ensuring Biden wins in 24”.
They want to syphon off independent voters who might otherwise vote for OMB.
The black pill always reveals the truth doesn’t it.
The MIC would love it for Lieberman to get in there.
Another great chapter.
The battle plan falls apart quickly but need a plan to start anyway.I t’s like when I’m going to fix something, in my mind I have it all figure out but somehow that never seems to translate into what really happens. 2 trips back to the hardware store later, if I haven’t already broke the original part, I’ll take another look in the morning, when I’m not so tired. Wish I had magic.
Thanks, Animal
Heh.
blocked by powerline
They’re just blocking “hotlinking”, so any connection with a Referer (sic) header set.
Just copy and paste the link into a new window/ tab and you’ll be able to see it (no Referer set in that case)
thanks
Hm. Works for me just clicking it.
They might be combining it w/ a cookie from Powerline or something like that
(to be clear – it looks like they’ll block if Referer is set to anything other than powerlineblog.com)
Settled science
DDT doesn’t belong with the others.
True, banning it has indirectly killed millions and I love the old photos of its inventor eating the stuff.
I hope this isn’t real.
https://thenationalpulse.com/2023/05/01/netherlands-canada-post-birth-abortions-rules/
fuck Europe
The amendments were added to the “Law Termination of Pregnancy and Life Termination of Newborns Regulations (LZA/LP),” which permitted the “termination” of children “suffering hopelessly and unbearably,” and who are “expected to die in the foreseeable future.” The law, which was restricted to up to one year, now permits children of all ages in what effectively amounts to post-birth abortion.
Children are just a clump of cells.
What constitutes hopeless and unbearable suffering, is that at the discretion of the doctor, the parents? Can a child be euthanized against his or her will at the behest of the parents? Seems like a child who wants to live could also be coerced by parents who feel inconvenienced by having a child with a medical condition. What a shit idea with bad incentives all around.
Just doesn’t seem right.
There may be conditions where this is acceptable, but I’m not sure I trust doctors to make the right decisions.
‘Sup, Satan?
So, if the kids aren’t fuckable, kill’m and get some new ones.