In the farthest reaches of the deep south, there exists the county of Alachua. The mighty rednecks of that wild country are indeed fierce and their brutality is highly advanced. Sometime around 1985, a child was conceived in the back of a pick-up truck at a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert and later abandoned upon birth. As he grew to maturity, he found himself possessed of amazing powers. Ornrier than burning hornet! More impulsive than Charlie Sheen! Able to drink Rick Flair under the table over and over! The infant of Alachua is now the Man of Florida. FLORIDA MAN!
To best use his incredible abilities in a never-ending battle for truth and justice, Florida Man has adopted the alter ego of Cletus Spunkmeyer, a mild-mannered catfish noodler.
We last met our hero and his sidekick Gator Boy just as they had finished defeating his arch-nemesis The Bureaucrat and his Paper Pusher minions. Now, they dine and celebrate at Hooters.
“Good work back there, Gator Boy”, intones Florida Man.
“Life gives countless gifts and death keeps them forever”, replies Gator Boy.
“Damn Skippy, that’s deep. You been reading Alan Watts or something?”
“No, I read that in a YouTube comment about a cartoon.”
But hark! Just then, a sinister old man in fatigues enters. After a dramatic pause, he steps into the light and speaks.
“Well, well, well. Looks like I finally have you two right where I want.”
“I’m afraid not, Sarcastro. You won’t get away from us this time” says Florida Man as he rises from his seat and breaks a beer bottle on the table.
“You’ve bitten off more than you can chew, Florida Man”, says Sarcastro as he produces a remote control with a scary red button from his pocket. “Behold! If I push this button, it will causes endangered baby sea turtles to turn gay and start burning American flags. And there’s nothing you can do to stop me because all the Hooters waitresses here are secretly my henchwomen!”
Epic power-up music plays as the henchwomen remove their tops to reveal the uniform of Sarcastro!
“Go get ’em Pinkos” shouts Sarcastro with a defiant sneer.
“So help me god, I’ll beat you to death with your own science fair project, you candy-ass shitdick” responds Florida Man.
In the ensuing struggle, our heroes are nearly defeated until Gator Boy discovers that three flicks to the ear will make the Pinko henchwomen cry like a baby in a bucket of onions. In the heat of battle, Sarcastro escapes without having pushed the button on the remote.
“Curse you, Sarcastro! You can run but you can’t hide from Florida Man!”
TO BE CONTINUED…
Thanks Derp, the cousins of Florida Man live near by, they’re not as tough and not nearly as intellectual but they all graduated with Honors
Form Hooters?
In the farthest reaches of the deep south, there exists the county of Alachua. The mighty rednecks of that wild country are indeed fierce and their brutality is highly advanced.
When I think of the county where the University of Florida resides, “fierce rednecks” isn’t the first term that comes to mind.
From one redneck to another:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3iVHxP8FQ
Today in I hate everyone involved.
An obvious solution screams out to be implemented, yet nobody is talking about it.
Everyone should ‘Lighten up Francis?”
I should add that the least hateful among this stew are the Sisters themselves, who are not, if memory servers, the “anti-Catholic hate group” the author is implying – they’re just a bunch of drag queens playing at some harmless if adult humor. They’ve been around since at least the 70’s.
Maybe they’ve been captured by radicals like every other organization – who knows.
All of which is irrelevant because sports teams have no excuse for promoting anything like this – or any other “cause”.
“Maybe they’ve been captured by radicals”
Seems likely, but I don’t know. Luggage Boy Brinton was a member, for what that’s worth.
ZOMG!
Intent. Isn’t. Fucking. Magic!
Nunface is wrong!
White face?
mickface?
“An obvious solution screams out to be implemented”
Cleansing fire?
A final solution?
The gift of the gun?
ESPN isn’t covering this one. A pitcher in the league calling for the boycott of a team would be newsworthy, I’d imagine. They are making sure to cover how another player had to apologize for an “anti-LGBTQ” post on social media.
Important news from the FPC:
First, the Board granted an Individual Membership to all individual monetary donors of FPC who have supported FPC’s activities through financial contribution(s) of twenty U.S. Dollars ($20) or more from June 1, 2022, through May 31, 2023, inclusive.
FPC members are party to the pistol brace injunction.
Yeah…I was checking that out earlier today. Seems dubious, at best.
Gonna pass.
“I won’t belong to any club that would have me as a member.”
Groucho Marx
Henchwomen?
I like henchwomen.
I have been slowly going through this, and as I am not a lawyer it is taking awhile for everything to sink in, but I think everyone here would be interested in this court case, and the reporting, or lack thereof.
https://brownstone.org/articles/censors-are-exposed-major-update-to-missouri-v-biden/
I am hoping the lawyers around the joint will weigh in on it.
I have been following it, some. It’s a very big deal. What do you want to know about it?
I was hoping for a view on the legal ramifications. How, in a general sense, does this play out? Does it block the gov’t as much as BS says it does? Is it a bunch of good sounding letters, but doesn’t, in the end mean much?
I guess I am looking for analysis of the cheap sort.
This case is a very big deal for two reasons. The first one is the preliminary injunction, if it is granted. In theory, the judge could order the government to cease all activity intended to censor citizens. That means no direction to social media companies and no working through NGOs.
The second reason is because the plaintiffs get to do discovery. It’s pretty clear the government has a lot to hide. If the plaintiffs expose what many people expect, it could have political ramifications.
If the government violates the injunction, what consequences would there actually be? Same thing if they win the case. Does anyone really think the government is going to stop this going forward even if they lose?
It would be great if there were political ramifications, but we already saw with the Twitter files that people voting for Dems don’t just not give a shit about their team censoring the right, they whole heartedly agree with it and cheer it on.
On your first point, I don’t have a good answer. It may be practically unenforceable. We will see what is granted, then figure out if enforcement is possible.
I understand but disagree with your second point. This is how you lose moderates. For certain NYT and WaPo readers will never see the story. If they hear about it, they will yawn. Beyond the faithful, everyone else is going to be enraged if this is what it appears to be. Assuming team stupid has a majority in at least one house of Congress, they will launch investigations. Not because they are principled, but because it will be popular and it will get them media exposure.
Also, I wouldn’t underestimate the rising independent media e.g. Substack, Rumble, etc. They are making inroads. Andrew Sullivan, Matt Taibbi, and Bari Weiss will keep this in front of their readers. Bill Maher will tee off on it. Liberals, not progressives, will hear about this and will have to reckon with it.
If the government violates the injunction, what consequences would there actually be?
“John Roberts has made his decision; now let him enforce it!”
I was skeptical of the significance, but if they can really block the government from working with social media companies or threatening them behind closed doors – really get them to cease all communication – that would be a huge win. I just don’t see that really happening, especially when there seems to be the same sort of revolving door with social media companies and government that we see in media.
Did everyone see Steel Panther on America’s Got Talent tonight? (also streaming on Peacock) I never imagined this day would come.
I never imagined the day would come when I would watch America’s Got Talent.
(That day still has not come)
Lol. I texted my kids when I found out SP would be on. Here is what I wrote:
Steel Panther will be on America’s Got Talent on May 30th. I didn’t think anything could get me to watch that show. I was wrong.
I’ll allow it.
* bangs gavel *
Is it likely one will be able to find a clip of their performance – with the judges’ reactions – on YT or somewhere on an NBC site? I’d be very curious to hear what Simon had to say about them.
I’ll enact your labor.
https://youtu.be/gHfSRef0Scs
Thanks, but I had already found that clip. 😉 What I was hoping I might find – which may not yet be available so soon after tonight’s episode – was what Simon had to say AFTER they performed. I’ll try to keep an eye out for that.
I have no idea if that’s available. There was roughly 10 seconds of Cowell and Mandel talking after SP left the stage. They seemed genuinely impressed.
Looks like they packed the crowd with their fans.
The camera should have spent more time on Sofia Vergara.
Christmas came early for Hayeksplosives!!
I’d placed some orders a while back and everything arrived TODAY!
My old Nevada boss finally shipped a few of my personal things i’d requested from my old office: patents, diplomas, taxidermied squirrel (natch), Blitzer projectile, probability slide rule. You know, the usual. 😂 One is a framed picture of the shape of lake Superior made from glass polished naturally and washed up on the shores of Lake Superior. Quite lovely.
Also got my St Barbara medal–patron saint of bombers and artillerymen. I’m not Catholic but I appreciate the “worry beads” aspect of the rosary. Got a new Russian orthodox cross too. Also the Leatherman that several of you had recommended as well as a utilitarian type pocket knife and an absolutely gorgeous blue abalone handled folding Damascus steel knife. Cuts like buttah.
So I am doing a happy dance like Santa has brought me a bunch of stuff all at once. Very happy!
👍
Happy for you!
Good!
Won an auction on GunBroker Monday, paid yesterday, got confirmation of the FFL today. This old boy is what is coming my way:
https://retting-auction.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/p/bsadbl12u166.jpg
A BSA Ejector model-delux, from around 1925. I am going to have to roll my own shells, as it takes 2-1/2″ 12 gauge, which is still in production, but is not too common, and no one expects any until next month. Fortunately, I have all the supplies for that.
Oooh, very nice! Beautiful wood and engraving.
Congratulations! I’m sure she’s going to be happy to be in an appreciative home.
Thank you, and congrats on your shipments!
Thanks!
I’m so happy to be reunited with my little taxidermy squirrel that it just underscores how much I need a furry friend.
I hope that Ernie, the 14 yo cat I tentatively chose, is still available when I get back from my late June trip.
Very nice! I love the old stamp lettering. Do you have something like that checked out first prior to firing?
Yeah, I am going to run it past a gunsmith in Salem, make sure it checks out. But, being in that good of condition on the outside, I don’t have much fears for the insides. A lot of it I could probably do myself, but, I am smart enough to know I could miss something.
Very nice.
Disney has dude in a dress greeting children at Disney Land.
Now they are just slapping the bull’s balls. Unbelievable.
You know, he’s probably better at the job than his female coworkers.
Well of course! He’s a motivated seller! ABC, Always Bring Children!
I could see that if there was a shortage of girls to do the job that they would bring in guys who are enthusiastic about helping the princesses find their perfect dress, etc. But why not put him up in kind of “Aladdin” style harem pants and such? That would be less jarring and less confusing for the kids, I’d think.
Jarring and confusing is the whole idea. They are doing this with a purpose in mind. Breaking social norms is what they do.
Someone in that company is determined to anger as many people as he/she/they can.
This is fine.
At some point there is going to be a shareholder lawsuit. All this virtue signaling is causing a drop in value. That’s got to be a breach of their fiduciary duty.
stakeholders > shareholders
I can’t imagine fucking with kids psyches the way that these freaks are doing. Woodchippers for the lot of them!
OT – I whinged last night about the condition I’m in. No more. I broke it, I bought it. Four + decades of poison and many concussions have left a mark. It’s time to pay the Piper.
I have a bad brain too. Just take daily multivitamins, B12, Folic acid.
Interestingly, Ataxia seems to have a heavy overlap with gluten problems! Maybe try a low gluten diet? Never been easier; lots of gluten-free meals out there.
Thank you Friend! Unfortunately my problem stems less from diet and more from death wish.
Sorry, dude. Didn’t mean to minimize it.
As you know, some of our medical “experts” are full of shit. So I do recommend the brains enhancers of folic acid, b12, multivitamins, and some good probiotics for the gut. That should hold off some of the bad shit like brain shrinkage and accumulation of ammonia.
If I’m wrong, they can push our wheelchairs together for one last lovely sunset before they release the brakes and give us a shove.
Thelma and Louise, baby.
But I’m afeared of heights!
Healthy respect not fear, friend.
Festus!
Good to see you.
I’ve been awake for 36hrs and I’m a bit surly. Watched Top Gun Maverick, the way people gushed about it is even sadder than I thought. “No need use CGI, looks so much gooder!1!” Yeah, lots of CGI, but just none in any place that could have improved the movie. Where as some good CGI backgrounds would have looked better than using those daft wide angle lenses for the cockpit shots. The acting and staging felt like watching a community theatre production. I hate everybody all the time.
Friend!
36 hrs is not kosher, by the way.
My Insomnia has a hair trigger. I had to work until 2am last night instead of my now steady 10pm. Could not sleep. Took Zzz Quil, took CBD, took several other meds that usually make me drowsy. Nothing. Spent the day mini-golfing and go-carting with my oldest nephew. Now a few beers in, still waiting for some slumber. I work that same shift Sat and Sun, looking forward to it. Not!
Old Buddy Old Pal; Love Ya Baby.
*lights cigarillo*
Hey CP, did you ever ponder teaching a class at a local college? You are obviously good at what you do. Maybe you might help someone else along the way. Perhaps there will be a sweet young thing that yearns to learn from you. Just asking…
Not college, but I did inquire about teaching k-12 summer school classes back in the day, and they pretty much told me to fuck off. That was after I had volunteered with the elementary drama club for a couple years when on of my nieces was in it and wrote them an original play based on ideas from the kids. Right now I’m too busy to even get the things on my own checklist done, much less anyone else’s.
The original isn’t that great either, really. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would.
Also, navy chick is in the new Schwarzenegger series.
Classic 80’s action
https://youtu.be/8u-XIjXS98Q
SAEDA!
I used to have the same problem, with some small lifestyle changes it mostly went away but I feel for you. Insomnia is a rough thing.
Hey y’all!
Wake up. 🌄
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yuTMWgOduFM
🎶🎶
https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/3-teens-nabbed-after-bucks-co-gun-store-burglary/ar-AA1bT4Yv
Fucking thieves.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/school-bus-driver-julie-pratt-charged-after-duct-taping-student-in-seat
I don’t see the problem.
OFFS.
Mornin’ all. Time to get to the gym.
I might do a little work in the yard between the gym and starting my workday.
Mornin’, reprobates!
The youngest Patzer started his summer internship yesterday. I asked what he’d be doing. “Building a data pipeline using Airflow”, says he.
LOL. That apple didn’t fall far from the tree.
Good morning, ‘patzie, Sean, rhy, Roat, and DEG!
Reliable Co-worker is back from his vacation today, so I guess that means I have to plod my way through the last half hour of the Board meeting to finish drafting the minutes. 😒
Mornin’.
Guy used AI to fill in additional backgrounds on classic paintings:
https://twitter.com/heykody/status/1662168390352666624?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1662168390352666624%7Ctwgr%5E7af23ef9fb71adb3231adac999f1f2cd2dc77c9e%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ace.mu.nu%2F
Ever wondered what the rest of the landscape the Mona Lisa’s standing in front of looks like? Well now you know…pretty neat I guess-made some interesting mistakes on some of them too.
Nice. AI is the latest addition to our collection of tools. Like every other tool, it can be used beneficially or destructively. The doomsayers need to STFU.
Can’t put the genie back in the bottle anyway.
Morning Everyone ! Another beautiful sunny July day, no rain to speak of. Garden looks great but with the constant watering the weeds are growing as well.
The bees seem not so busy, maybe a lack of flowers because of the lack of rain? Who knows? Tons of skeeter bugs though but maybe a little less than a couple days ago. Dragon flies showed up so that may help.
Mornin’.
suh’ fam
whats goody